AN: Summary tells you must of what you need to know.
I've had to make some changes for this set-up to be Oregairu plausible. Some are aesthetic, others are more notable. I've aged up some characters like Iroha so I could use them in the same year as Hachiman- it seemed a waste not to- as well as spread the cast of characters out across Japan. In this story's canon, none of them attended the same high school before getting into the story's 'Battle Royale' location, Sobu Boarding School. Also, some of the characters needed to have a bit of an intelligence lift to get in. In fairness, Sobu High is a pretty selective school anyway, so I don't think it's too much of a jump.
There will be an ample amount of violence in this story. I'm gonna start off the rating at T but considering how dark the story will get it will probably end up as an M. This is a Battle Royale, after all.
The Tests
Prologue-
Many people had heard of Sobu Boarding School. Only those who survived it understood.
It was established in the year 2033 by a man named Nagasaka Ueno, a famous shipping magnate who went on to become the Prime Minister of Japan. In a matter of years, the success of the school's alumni created such an air of prestige and mystery that 'Sobu Boarding School' became a household name.
Rumours about the institution spread like wildfire. People weren't even sure where the school was, let alone what it entailed. Some people said it was located on a remote island. Other people said it was an obscure mountain retreat. Some people even doubted its existence, and who could blame them? It sounded too blatantly elitist to be true.
But it wasn't ridiculous. It was real. All the most successful people in Japan since the 2050s had been to Sobu Boarding School. CEOs, politicians, yakuza bosses… everyone. They all had Sobu Boarding School on their resume. It didn't claim to be a university, although you went there instead of university. No one knew how long the courses were, or even if it had courses.
Nonetheless, by the 2060s, the boarding school had opened up to such an extent that anyone of the right age could apply. The application process, however, was shrouded in secrecy, thanks to an assault of non-disclosure agreements should anyone choose to try. Ones serious enough to dissuade anyone from talking about the process.
The school became a taboo subject. If a journalist dared to ask a known alumni about the school, they point blank refused to answer. If anything about the school was posted online, it was removed and whoever broke their non-disclosure agreement was prosecuted. Or worse.
There were whispers of people going missing. They never progressed beyond whispers, and they never dissuaded prospective students from applying.
After all, how bad could it really be?
Chapter 1- Your Only Opportunity
1.1
It never crossed Hikigaya Hachiman's mind to apply for Sobu Boarding School until he received the email.
To him, that name had only ever amounted to a passing interest. A topic to be read about at 3am online, or watch shakily researched conspiratorial Youtube vids about. He didn't doubt its existence like a lot of people, which often surprised him because Hikigaya Hachiman was an indomitable cynic. He doubted or questioned virtually everything- people, friendships, the society around him. But not the school.
He couldn't say why that was. People spoke about it as if it existed, which would usually be an excellent reason for him to disbelieve them. Perhaps the idea that success in life could be so fixed, so pre-determined, actually appealed to his cynicism rather than disagreed with it.
Either way, when he saw the notification for an email pop up on his computer screen, half way through an online match of the game Kombat X, he wasn't that surprised.
The email was entitled simply An Opportunity. He expected it to be another spam email advert for a university; after all, his third year exam season was fast approaching, and the already backbreaking competition for top university places had started in earnest.
Hachiman opened it up reluctantly as a result- his mouse was already hovering over delete as his eyes scanned the text. He'd already planned what to do with himself post high-school; find some form of low end employment immediately, something he could do in his sleep, and then frequent high end bars until he found a lonely old spinster who he could become a house husband for.
It was a despicable life plan, but really, Hachiman thought it was logical. He remembered well the first time he'd relayed this plan to his parents:
"Really, it makes a lot of sense. The competition for a 'top' university like Tokyo is so ridiculous that I don't think it's worth the effort. I'm not unintelligent, but I don't rate myself highly enough to get into a place like that, and everyone knows that a degree from a 'lower' uni is useless-"
"Hachima-"
"So, that leaves me with one option: cutting out the middle man. I'll go straight into a dead-end job instead and try and build up as much savings as I can. Bare minimum lifestyle, cupboard flat, the rest. Then I'll find some old woman I can leech off-"
"Hachiman-"
"Really, this is all your fault. Seriously, why won't the older generations just die already? You guys are all living into your hundreds and holding onto the good jobs into your seventies. There's nothing left for good, honest young people like me. And I can't rely on inheriting off you for a while, so-"
"HIKIGAYA HACHIMAN."
His parents then went on another lecture about undervaluing himself, and how he was perfectly capable of getting into a 'top' university if he tried. Also something about making rude comments and hoping for their death. His sister, Komachi, also scolded him for that one.
Although Hachiman had been half-joking, nothing he'd said had been untrue. The fertility rate was so low, and the life expectancy so high, that the hopes of a young person getting a good job on meritocracy alone were pretty much non-existent, and had been for decades. People had never lived longer, or had more older dependants. More young people got their degrees on the street than they did at a university, all of which were overpriced and guaranteed nothing. Life, in Hachiman's eyes and many other's, was a birth-related lottery. Either be born rich, or… well.
Unluckily for Hachiman, he'd been born to two extremely honest parents who worked themselves to the bone for pay far below any reasonable bracket. Was that the life he wanted? The life that he'd spent his whole youth listening to his parents, far better off than him, complain about?
Of course not. And they blamed him for being cynical.
Komachi had persuaded him into apologising for the tirade that time- and for several others before and afterwards. She later admitted to him in private, however, that her plan was somewhat similar. Try and get into a university to appease their parents, then try her luck in a bar job. Hopefully, the kind that a lot of rich old men who appreciated good looks and charm frequented.
He'd smirked. "I'm guessing you haven't told Kaa-san and Oto-san that?"
"Of course not! It's beneficial being the favourite, you know…"
For this, and several hundred other reason he could scarcely count, Hachiman did not expect much from the email.
Reading it, at the very least, made him pause.
Hikigaya Hachiman: An Opportunity
You are invited to apply for a place at Sobu Boarding School.
This is not just the opportunity of a lifetime. This is your only opportunity.
The First Stage of Application will take place on the 12th February at exactly 12 noon. You will not need to prepare for the application. No further information will be disclosed at this point in time.
Competition for a place has never been greater. It has also never been fairer. There is no limit to how many can attend Sobu Boarding School. If you are worthy of a place, you will be offered one. There are no tuition or accommodation fees for Sobu Boarding School. If you are worthy of a place, we will pay all expenses.
Signed, Sobu Board of Directors
He read it over a couple of times, just to make sure it was real. Next, he found himself wondering whether it was a scam or some sort of joke; the notion fell away quickly. It looked very official, and something about the phrasing, its quiet authority, was instantly believable. In most cases that would probably convince him it wasn't real, but this…
This is not just the opportunity of a lifetime. This is your only opportunity.
Hikigaya Hachiman raised an eyebrow, and then shrugged. Even if it was genuine, he told himself it didn't matter either way. He had no plans to apply to Sobu Boarding School, just as he had no plans to apply for any university.
Yet closing the tab of his email, the wording remained, strangely haunting, like an echo in his head.
This is your only opportunity…
1.2
Nothing might have come of this 'opportunity' had Hachiman not brought it up himself, in a conversation with his father.
Hikigaya Nobu rarely came home at any time before midnight. He worked a desk job at a local office firm that had him staying pushing pencils until ungodly hours. It was the kind of bureaucratic and mindless job that you couldn't let go for fear of not finding anything better. The kind that trapped you in a constant mind-numbing cycle, like a Venus fly trap.
But that was just how Hachiman saw it. Hikigaya Nobu might not have chosen it in an ideal world, but there was little more rewarding to him than knowing he'd worked hard to support his family. Deriving some form of pleasure from the job was about as much as he could hope for. And this certainly was not an ideal world.
On the evening of this rare pre-midnight finish, Hikigaya Nobu all but collapsed onto the couch in their tiny living room. They lived in a three bedroom, high rise apartment that overlooked the suburbs of Chiba. Blocks like these were on every street corner, many of them built in the 2030s to meet the demands of extortionate overcrowding in Japan's urban sprawls.
Hachiman was the only one home at the time. His mother was still working and Komachi was out with some of her friends. He entered the living room and saw his father sitting there with surprise.
It occurred to him that he could scarcely remember the last time he'd spoken with his father.
"… Hey, Oto-san."
"What? Oh, son… you surprised me a little there."
His father's eyes were half-closed, on the brink of dozing off already. Hachiman didn't know what to say for a moment.
"… How was work?"
"Oh you know, same old."
"Yeah."
Another pause.
"Well, do you want me to grab you some food, or something? It won't be a Komachi meal, but-"
"No, don't worry about that. Have a seat though." He briefly turned and offered him a small smile. "It'd be good to catch up, right?"
Hachiman sat down next to his father, and found his eyes running over his appearance, the shabby and worn suit, the tired expression and the hair just as unruly as his but older, longer. The dead fish pupils which he'd inherited were just then focused on the ceiling. He'd forgotten how similar they looked.
"How's your school work going?" His father asked.
"Alright. I'm keeping up, which is something." Hachiman snorted. "Most people don't bother."
"Well, the workload is very high. You'd best get used to that."
"If my house-husband plan goes through, I won't have to."
"… You still clinging onto that ridiculous idea, then?"
"There's nothing ridiculous about it. It's the best possible idea for anyone in my situatio-"
"What about universities? You have any ideas where to apply to yet?"
Hachiman decided not to argue the topic this time. "… No, not really."
"You must have some idea."
"Oh yeah, I'm actually planning to apply for Sobu Boarding School," he snapped sarcastically. "I heard they're offering free places this year."
"… Sobu Boarding School?" His father glanced at him sideways. "What made you bring that up?"
"It's called sarcasm, Oto-san. Don't suppose you've heard of it?"
"… Sobu Boarding School…" He murmured, as if he really hadn't heard. "… Huh."
Already, Hachiman had a niggling suspicion where this distinctly uncomfortable line of questioning could end. He stood up and brushed down his school uniform.
"Well, I'd best get on with that schoolwork you mentioned. You know, get into good habi-"
"Hachiman… please. Can we just, for once, talk about this seriously?"
"Talk about what seriously?"
"Don't play dumb. Your future."
The tone of his father's voice was absent of the anger that usually accompanied this topic. Instead, it was bordering on desperate. Hachiman glanced back around and saw in his father's face what he already knew: that his father was worried sick about him.
Hachiman sat back down.
"Fine. Talk."
"… Look. I'm tired of going through the motions right now. I'm tired of telling you that I just want the best for you. And quite frankly, I'm tired of your excuses. You're a clever kid, Hachi-"
"-I'm-"
"-Don't try and deny it. You do far less work than the others at the top of your school, and yet you're in the top five for the majority of your subjects. In Japanese, I've only ever seen you finish in first place. In Math, which is your weakest subject, you're still a very high performer." Hikigaya Nobu shook his head. "To see you…" He trailed off.
"What?" Hachiman replied tersely.
He lowered his head. "… To see you waste your opportunity in life, Hachiman… I don't think I could bear that."
This is not just the opportunity of a lifetime. This is your only opportunity…
"… Son, are you listening to me-"
"Yes, I'm listening to you. I just don't agree with you."
"Damn it, Hachiman. Is there really nothing I can say to convince you? You have a chance! You have a better chance than most people at succeeding in this stupid, rigged system, and you're convincing yourself that you don't! You could get into those top universities, son! Hell, you could probably get into Sobu Boarding School if you trie-"
"As much as I'm flattered by your high opinion of me," Hachiman intoned drily, "we shouldn't lose track of reality. There is no way on this earth that I could get into Sobu Boarding School."
"And that's an excuse not to try?"
"No, it's the truth. Chiba University, maybe. Tokyo University, if I studied until my fingers bled. But don't go saying nonsense about Sobu Boarding School. Everyone knows that's a closed shop."
There was a moment of silence where both Hachiman and his father sat there, arms crossed, dead fish eyes glaring at each other intently. He realised again how similar they looked.
"… Wanna bet?"
"… What?"
"I said, do you wanna bet?" His father said clearer, not breaking eye contact.
Hachiman continued staring at him for a moment, and then burst out laughing. "Are you serious right now?"
"Yes, I'm serious. If you're so sure you won't get into university, why don't we make a bet?"
"… What sort've bet-"
"Anything. Your choice. If I win, I get to see you go to university, no more excuses, no more complaints. If you win… well, you choose what you get from the deal."
"This is so stupid. I hope you realise this, Oto-san. And it's definitely not going to work-"
"You can choose the uni that you apply for as well as your prize for failing. However, you have to try your best. Otherwise it doesn't count. You have to study and prepare every day, to your best effort. Komachi can check for me and report back, since I'm never home when you'd be studying." Hikigaya Nobu sat back in his chair, looking oddly pleased with himself.
Hachiman opened his mouth, ready to turn him down, then considered what his father had said. A bet where if he failed to get into university, which was extremely probable, he would still benefit… and the only downside of it was that if he got in, he would have to go to said university.
It was a win-win situation… well, only if the university he chose to apply for was worth attending. Not that he would get in anyway. But if it was somewhere that could also provide him with an opportunity…
There it was again. That word. Opportunity.
He thought it over once more, and then again, trying to figure out the best form of this supposed 'bet', what he could get for failing to get in, what would improve his chances of failing.
Then, the idea struck him. He smirked, and met his father's eyes again.
"… Alright. I'll take you up on this."
Hikigaya Nobu smiled, before being interrupted again.
"But here are my conditions. First of all, the prize I get for failing to attend… When I do fail, which is inevitable, you have to cover more of my living costs."
The smile was quickly gone from his father's face. Such was the absurd prices of living in Japan and the low wages for employment, that he had already agreed to help with Hachiman and Komachi's financial situations when they first moved out. They would only do so when they had a reasonable paying job, and for rent their parents would foot 30% percent of the bill. For families like them, this was a common enough arrangement, but any more than that would have them reaching deep into their pockets.
"… What kind of son did I raise, to make a request like that?"
"One that you'd better hope is good enough for Sobu Boarding School."
And there it was. The sinker which guaranteed Hachiman could only profit from this bet.
"… That's your choice of where to apply for?"
"Yep." Hachiman's smirk remained. "If I get a place, I will go to Sobu Boarding School. I promise. But if I don't, you foot half of my rent."
"50 percent is too much. 35."
"40."
"…"
In Hachiman's eyes, this form of the 'bet' barely constituted one, because the only possible outcome for him was failure, and then paradoxically victory. The email he'd read had only reassured him how difficult it was to get into this school. Hachiman truly did not believe that it was within his capabilities.
Of course, he was making the bet as unfair as possible because he wanted his father to fold. Both of them were stubborn as rocks, and agreeing to going along with it would still be, to a certain extent, giving in.
The smirk disappeared from Hachiman's face when he heard his father's response.
"Okay."
"… Sorry, could you repeat that? I don't think I heard you."
"Okay. That sounds good to me."
Hachiman blinked. "You've got to be joking. Don't you realise how rigged this is?"
"In my favour, yes."
"How?!"
"Because you, kid, are betting on your chances of failure. You're shorting your own stocks. I, however, am best positioned to know how valuable they really are."
He snorted. "With that sort've judgement, I'll count myself lucky you never went into investing. You'd have bankrupted us in a day."
"We'll see about that."
"Oto-san, this… this is never going to work."
"And here comes the denial."
"No, it's just tha-"
But Hikigaya Nobu was already standing up. It occurred to Hachiman that he'd rarely seen his father look so confident, so self-assured.
"May the best man win?"
"Isn't that the total opposite of the bet we just made?"
"Perhaps." His father turned around, looking far more satisfied than he should have done, and walked towards his bedroom. "I'm gonna get some sleep. You probably should as well, with all that studying you'll have to do. Oh, and Hachiman?"
"… What?"
"…" Hikigaya Nobu smiled. "Do your best."
1.3
The 12th February arrived in what felt like the blink of an eye.
Hachiman was glad for how quickly the time seemed to pass. Unfortunately for him, the same couldn't be said for the hateful three hours of studying that became a part of his daily routine. This was valuable free time he'd spent playing games or reading light novels before- all of a sudden, he was having to be proactive and disciplined instead.
Not only was the work exhausting, but the guilt he felt for asking his parents to spend so much money on him invalidated every scratch of the pen. Granted, he'd been trying to bluff his father out of the bet with the request, but the guilt remained. It was only the insistence of Hachiman's family that he couldn't back out which kept him going.
His mother, while initially disapproving of the bet, had been persuaded of its merits when she saw the work it was squeezing out of him. Komachi, who was designated the responsibility of checking on his progress, just seemed to enjoy teasing him. But he also sensed that she approved just as much as their parents.
"I don't know, Onii-chan… I think this could turn out to be really good for you!" she'd announced brightly, whilst watching him work one evening.
"Sure, it could do. If I fail the application process. Otherwise it will be terrible-"
"I'm just glad Oto-san bullied you into this. Now, I get to watch you go through the same pain that I'll go through when I apply!" She beamed. "Makes me feel loads better about things!"
"I can tell," Hachiman had grumbled. "You've always been a sadist when it comes to your Onii-chan."
"Oh, come on. Don't tell me the thought of getting into Sobu Boarding School doesn't excite you? Even just a tiny ittle little bit?"
"No, it doesn't. It will be full of rich, arrogant, intelligent people that I'd despise."
"But it would set you up for life-"
"The email said that I wouldn't have to prepare for the application. I don't see why I have to study so much."
She snorted, interrupting him right back. "Everyone else will, you stupid lump. Just because it says you shouldn't prepare doesn't mean people won't. It's Sobu Boarding School!"
"Thus making this whole process pointless…"
Komachi had giggled, flicking Hachiman's forehead with a strange note of pride. "We'll just have to wait and see, won't we?"
By the time the waiting was over, he was thoroughly sick of the whole ordeal. The workload had worn him down. A second email had been sent out to all 'potential applicants' the week before, giving them a venue for the First Stage of the process, and when the 12th February dawned, Hachiman left their apartment excited to get the bet over with.
The day was overcast and chilly. He stepped onto the sidewalk outside his apartment block and zipped up his jacket. Streams of litter danced around on the sharp wind, and the familiar odour of the junkyard down the road filled the air. The majority of streets in Japan's big cities were rundown, and his was no exception.
He walked past a homeless man on the way to the bus stop, and then another sitting beside it. Homelessness was such a huge issue in Chiba and Tokyo that the government had long since given up on policies to resolve it. The benefit system had broken down in the 2040s.
Both of the hallowed faces he saw, Hachiman noticed, were young. The man by the bus stop couldn't have been much older than twenty.
The bus journey to the address in the email- Aiya Warehouse- took little over twenty minutes, and he arrived outside the address at 11:45 AM. If it hadn't been for the crowd of nervous looking students waiting outside, he wouldn't have guessed for a moment this was the venue. There were no signs outside, no waiting party, no one to greet them. Just a gate, and a cold steel warehouse behind it that didn't look at all worthy of a prestigious institution like Sobu Boarding School.
He walked through the gates and up to the warehouse where the rest of the students were waiting. Some were in groups- they'd likely arrived together- but many stood alone. His eyes surveyed them, counting about fifty applicants in total. It was lower than he'd expected; granted, the venues for application must have been decided by geography, but the suburb of Chiba that Hachiman lived in was well populated.
Then again, it had practically taken a bribe to convince him to apply. Most people probably thought it was a hopeless endeavour as well.
At first, Hachiman thought that he didn't recognise anyone at the venue. When a flash of light blue hair caught his eye, he stopped short.
At the very back of the throng, leaning against the metallic surface of the warehouse itself, was a girl from his school. Her name was Kawa-something (Hachiman couldn't remember it in full). Furthermore, he only knew her by reputation. She had been in his class during last year and still was now, but had become notorious for her extended absences. The delinquent persona she exuded only added to the rumour mill.
There was also the added fact that she was attractive- not in a traditional way, but a curvaceous 'don't fuck with me' sort've way. In short, there were few people he would have expected to see applying for Sobu Boarding School less than Kawa-something.
Suddenly, she glanced over in his direction and they met eyes. He looked away, not wanting to embarrass either of them. Still, the fact that he could almost sense her own gaze burning into him hinted that she wouldn't have expected to see him here either. By the time he looked in her direction again, she had lit up a cigarette and was glaring a hole into her shoes.
The time reached 11:55 AM and there still hadn't been any sign they were in the right place. No one to greet them, no announcements whatsoever. The rest of the crowd was getting fidgety.
As it happened, the evidence they needed came from another student.
The sound of a car pulling up outside the warehouse alerted them to another new arrival. There had been several arrivals by car, so much so that Hachiman didn't pay much attention. It was only when a long, sickeningly stylish limousine pulled up, its colour a deep black, that he too began to take notice.
There were hushed whispers spreading through the students when a chauffeur stepped out of the driver's seat and opened the passenger door. Following him out of the car were two women, both with long black hair that somehow seemed even darker than the surface of the car behind them.
This was enough to intensify the whispers all the more. He listened as the two women, one of them taller and wearing a work jacket and pencil skirt, the other slimmer and wearing home clothes, spoke to each other outside the limousine.
The older of the pair, that he guessed were sisters, leaned in and whispered something in the other's ear. Hachiman couldn't make out her expression, but her posture noticeably stiffened.
"That's… that's Yukinoshita Haruno!"
"No way-"
"-that can't be righ-"
"No, I'm sure of it! She's next in line for the Yukinoshita family company, and she went to Sobu Boarding School! Just like her mother and father…"
Hachiman raised an eyebrow. Even he, someone largely disillusioned with politics, was aware of the Yukinoshita family. The 'father' in question had held the Chiba National Diet seat for as long as he could remember, and was a political heavyweight in his party. Billboards that read 'Yukinoshita Corporation' around Japan were commonplace. These were the people that would end up running the country one day.
Well, at least we know we've come to the right place… Hachiman thought.
The older sister then stepped back and bowed, before getting back into the car with her chauffeur. It drove away with a hum, leaving a silence in its wake. The girl remained still for a moment, before turning and walking towards the rest of the students.
No one said a word as she approached. She didn't even glance at the rest of the students, her gaze fixed solely on the door to the warehouse, her steps quick and full of intent.
She passed Hachiman, and he took in her appearance for the first time. For a moment, he didn't believe his own eyes. This girl, this child of the 'Yukinoshita' family, was almost too beautiful. Her hair was silky and long, her eyes blue and clear, her features like a collage from a fashion magazine. But it was a cold beauty- ice-like, maintained. She looked like an ice statue re-animated, missing the vital pieces of humanity.
These were the kind of students that attended Sobu Boarding School. Hachiman had never been more grateful that he wouldn't get in.
They only had to wait a couple more minutes. At 12 o'clock precisely, just as the email had promised, a voice rung out over the warehouse. Hachiman turned, searching for where the sound was coming from, and noticed a speaker system attached to the metallic wall.
"Welcome, everyone, to the First Stage of Application for Sobu Boarding School. We wish you the best of luck."
There was some more fidgeting, and then as if on its own accord, the inconspicuous fire-escape door to the warehouse swung open. The tin-like voice rang out again, artificial and female.
"If you would still like to apply, then please enter and form an orderly queue inside. You will then receive further instructions."
While the crowd hesitated, taken back by their impersonal nature of it all, the Yukinoshita girl did not. She walked straight over to the fire escape door and into the shadowy interior of the warehouse. The door was too narrow and the inside too dark to see what it held, but the rest of the crowd followed her in afterwards, reassured.
Hachiman took his place in the line towards the back. He happened to place just behind the girl from his school, Kawa-something. She either didn't notice him or refused to look- Hachiman guessed it was the latter- so as they walked in he was entertained with a view of her blue ponytail, bobbing in his eye-line.
It was somehow colder inside the warehouse than it was outside, and considerably darker. There were no ceiling lights- only the pale glow emanating from within a long line of crystal white booths. Each booth, a cube about a two metres on each side, was closed off by a sliding door. They were organised in lines of ten, more than enough for all of them.
By each one stood a man dressed in a formal suit, their eyes covered by sunglasses, their arms crossed in front of them like bouncers. They were an intimidating sight, and the students all lined up on the opposite side of the booths with wide eyes. Hachiman tried to keep his face impassive, but couldn't help wondering just what sort've place this school was. If every testing venue was like this, each one taken as seriously as the last… just how much money and influence did Sobu Boarding School have?
The Yukinoshita girl remained stood at the front of the queue, looking calm to the point of boredom. After a pause, the artificial voice resonated once more.
"Before participating in the application, you must fulfil our conditions. In in the interest of Sobu Boarding School's privacy, we ask you to sign a non-disclosure agreement. These are legally binding, and are taken extremely seriously. If you refuse to sign, you will not be allowed to apply for Sobu Boarding School."
A rumble of noise ran down the queue.
"The non-disclosure agreement refers both to the contents of the First Stage of Application and, should you receive a sufficient score, any details of the Second Stage. You may discuss your score with immediate family only, and no details of the test. They will also be required to sign non-disclosure agreements should you progress to the Second Stage of Application. The breaking of these agreements will make you liable to prosecution, fines and incarceration."
Someone from the middle of the queue shouted out a question. "Aren't we allowed to deliberate on this? Y'know, read the non-disclosure papers and then come back?"
"The First Stage of Application for Sobu Boarding School will take place now," one of the men by the booths replied, emotionless. "This is your only chance to apply."
The person went quiet, and the announcer voice continued.
"Regarding the application itself: The First Stage will take thirty minutes. No extra time or breaks will be permitted under any circumstances. Your results will be emailed to you immediately after being processed. Any disturbances, cheating or collusion will also make you liable to prosecution, fines and incarceration."
Immediately after the announcement cut off, the same guard who had spoken before stepped forward.
"Step forward one at a time. Less have attended the application for this venue than estimated, so there will be enough booths for all of you. No one will have to wait."
Again, the Yukinoshita girl stepped forward as if on automatic, her expression as inhumanly still as the guards. She was directed to the first booth and entered it without a word.
The rest followed her example with more ease than they might have done; if a family that powerful was willing to put their daughter through this, it couldn't be that unsafe. The next student in line, a boy with glasses, moved with nervous steps towards the second booth and paused before opening the sliding door. A cold stare from the guard assuaged his fears.
Hachiman didn't have to wait long for his turn. The line shortened until only Kawa-something was in front of him- he was led, just behind her, towards the last line of booths, the third from last.
He thanked his lack of expectations, and thus lack of nerves, as he slid open the door. At least his family had only asked him to apply on the pretence of a bet. Many of the other students in the line had been visibly sweating under the pale lights, no doubt the words of the automated email, this is your only opportunity, running through their minds.
The booth was empty save for a desk, which was itself occupied by two things: a pile of forms with a pen, and an expensive looking computer. He took a seat and picked up the forms first. As the announcer had detailed, the forms read 'Non-Disclosure Agreement' on the top, with blocks and blocks of worrying looking small print.
In picking up the pen and signing his name, the word 'Faustus' insisted on playing in Hachiman's head. He tried to remember the agreement he'd made with his family. The disappointment he would see on their faces if he refused to do the test now wasn't hard to imagine- perhaps because he'd seen it all before. One too many times.
The desktop screen presented a single paragraph of text, blinking above a background of dim blue light: "Welcome to the First Stage of Application for Sobu Boarding School. By pressing Continue, you agree that you have signed our non-disclosure agreement and consent to all our terms and conditions."
Hachiman delayed for a second longer, and then pressed Continue.
"Please enter your personal information below."
It was all the normal details- name, age, address, ethnicity. He entered them, and then was warned one final time about the consequences of breaching their conditions.
Then, the test began.
As soon as the first question appeared on the screen, Hachiman was groaning. The first email had said as much, but now it was obvious that all his hours of studying had been redundant from the start. At a guess, he would say it was a specifically designed IQ test, or something along those lines. One that couldn't be 'revised' for in simple terms.
The first question was a logic puzzle involving shapes. He considered it for little over thirty seconds before entering the answer, but the next five were all along the same lines. Just as he was getting used to the mathematical tone of the test, the questions became linguistic. They would give him a blank space in a sentence and ask him to choose a word, justifying his choice based on the occasion where the sentence would be spoken.
Following on from that, the questions bordered on abstract. Some took the form of riddles and word play, others sequences of numbers. Others were scientific or creative. Hachiman spent a good few minutes deliberating over a later question before realising it was asking him to use a rule established earlier in the test. Thinking outside the box, literally and figuratively, seemed to be a requirement.
He was half-way through writing out an answer when, from nowhere, the shrill sound of an alarm ripped through the warehouse. It was loud and high pitched enough to force him to cover his ears. Hachiman jumped up from his seat wildly, taken by surprise.
The announcer voice broke over the alarm. "Signs of cheating have been detected in Booth 34. Your timers have been paused. We apologise for the delay."
Although the alarm persisted, Hachiman quickly began to make out raised voices from further down his line of booths. It was that of a male student, followed by the gruff shout of one of the guards. They rose in volume. A door slammed. The sound of heels scraping along the floor of the warehouse.
"… no, I promise, I didn't mea-"
The male student's voice trailed off. A crack. The slamming of another door- the fire escape.
The alarm turned off. Deathly silence.
"We apologise for the delay. Please continue with the test."
Hachiman finished three more questions before he realised he was still holding his breath.
The timer started to dwindle, and the test became harder. For the first half, he couldn't imagine many people struggling with the difficulty- that, or he was severely underestimating himself. Either way, when the timer ran down fully, he had finished all of the available questions.
They didn't have to wait. The computer asked him to press a Finish button, which he did, and then it shut down, the blue monitor extinguishing like streetlights at dawn. There was no waiting period as the guard outside his booth knocked on the door.
"Step out with your forms in hand."
He followed the instructions quickly. Outside the booth, everyone handed their non-disclosure agreements to the guards and waited with bated breath. He glanced in Kawa-something's direction out of curiosity. She too looked tense, her fists clenched by her side.
They were directed to leave in reverse order to how they entered, one at a time. Hachiman was glad for not having to wait any longer. He was one of the very first out of the warehouse.
Breathing in fresh air had scarcely felt so sweet. Relieved of the dim lights of the booths, even the rundown Chiba suburb and the bitingly cold air felt like a luxury. He shoved his hands into his pockets and moved to the side. At least it's over.
As the rest of the students streamed out after him, he became aware that Kawa-something too was standing away from the crowd. She was definitely more invested in the test than he was, having already lit another cigarette through trembling fingers. She pulled out her phone and scrolled down, then put it away again.
She's checking her emails? They can't have processed the results already… she must really want this. The sight of this delinquent, unapproachable girl looking so unlike her image was a shock to his system.
A tinge of sympathy passed through him, and he opened his mouth to offer her some words of reassuran-
"Don't even think about talking to me, idiot," Kawa-something snapped, immediately walking away.
… Oh yeah. I forgot she was a total bitch.
If anything, Hachiman was glad for the feeling of familiar social embarrassment- it relieved some of the built up tension in his limbs. Feeling oddly refreshed, he walked past the lingering crowds of worried students and back towards the bus stop. Even the sight of the Yukinoshita girl, patiently awaiting the return of the ink-black limousine, couldn't dull his mood.
As the bus journey back home came and went, the positives of the strange, disturbing experience came better into focus. The shrill sound of the announcer and the desperate shouts of the removed student- the scraping of his feet along the floor- were replaced by thoughts of the bet with his father.
No more three hours a day of studying. No more talk of getting into Sobu Boarding School. From now on, it was all behind him. He could look forward to being a parasitic house husband without any more pressure from his family. Oh, and with some added financial security to boot, no matter how guilty it made him feel.
In fact, by the time Hachiman was stood outside their apartment door, waiting to be let back in, his mood was borderline optimistic. Now there's a real surprise…
He tapped in the passcode and opened it slowly. "I'm back-"
"How did it go?!"
Komachi's arms had enveloped him in seconds. He stumbled backwards from the force, confronted with his sister's face of simultaneous excitement and nerves. Her eyes, so much wider and brighter than his, were brimming with life.
"… Stop suffocating me, and I might tell you…" Hachiman rasped.
"Oh, sorry!" The apology didn't sound very authentic.
She let go of him and all but pushed him into their apartment, where their parents were waiting in the living room. They stood up when they saw him, similarly full of anticipation.
He decided to douse cold water on their expectations as fast as possible. "Don't look at me like that. I've told you a million times this is hopeless-"
"And I've told you a million times that we're not going to listen," his father interrupted, smiling.
"As long as you did your best. That was part of the bet, right?" said his mother.
"Yeah yeah yeah, I tried, don't worry about it."
"You still haven't told me how it went!" Komachi yelled, pouting.
"We won't know until I get the results back. They said they'd email me once the processing was complete-"
"Then check your emails, baka!"
Hachiman rolled his eyes, walking back over to his bedroom. His family followed him in defiantly. "It's gonna take longer than an hour, Komachi. There's probably thousands that applied. It will take days-"
"Well, I'm not letting go of you until you check." Komachi arms were clinging onto him before he could react or pull away, the grip strong and defiant. He glared down at his sister but she glared right back.
He was about to insist they gave him some space, but then… there it was again. Written all over his family's faces, clearer than stars glimmering at night, was a feeling he hadn't seen in them in quite some time. Of course, he knew deep down that they would always be proud, no matter how much he screwed up, no matter how deeply he let down their expectations. That was how family worked, and Hikigaya Hachiman's was better than most.
But the thought that he could exceed their expectations, rather than disappoint them… really make them proud… was more than a match for his cynicism.
Hachiman rolled his dead fish eyes again, taken back by the strength of emotion. "… Fine. I'll check. But then you get out of my damn room."
Komachi squealed loudly as he turned on his computer and brought up the internet.
"You better not back out of this when you see my results, Oto-san. You know what we agreed. 40%."
"I know son. It was me who suggested this, y'know." His tone was teasing.
"I really don't see the point of this." He opened up his emails. "There's no way they could have processed the results this quickly-"
Hachiman stopped dead. The mouse key hovered, motionless, over an unopened email from Sobu Boarding School.
"… What was that you were saying, Onii-chan?" Komachi whispered, nudging him. "Open it."
"…" Hachiman hesitated. The mouse key still didn't move.
Why was he suddenly so nervous about this? The sensation of his family's eyes burnt into the back of his skull. He dared not look at them.
He clicked open.
Hikigaya Hachiman: Your Results
Congratulations. You have passed the First Stage of Application for Sobu Boarding School.
A legal representative of ours will come to your address tomorrow, at 2pm, with information about the Second Stage of Application. All immediate members of your family, or those you live with, must be present.
Remember: this is your only opportunity.
Signed, Sobu Board of Directors
1.4
Hachiman spent the next week doing his upmost to forget. What had become a far off impossibility, the equivalent of a joke in his head, was now startlingly plausible.
The arrival of the legal representative, just as the email had promised, was when the reality began to fully settle in. Reading the words 'you have passed' alone wasn't enough. A man in the same suits as the Aiya Warehouse sitting in their living room, taking out pages and pages of legal documents, asking them to fill them out, refusing to even say his name for confidentiality reasons… that was.
His family's mood had been celebratory. Komachi wouldn't stop rattling on about it. His father wouldn't stop saying 'I told you so'. It was all they spoke of. Going to school had been the chore in Hachiman's life and getting back home the relief for as long as he could remember- but the two had reversed. Now, being home felt uncomfortable, so flattered with praise he felt he didn't deserve.
Two schooldays after the application, Kawa-something had been in attendance. She paid less attention than before, which was quite impressive. In their Math class, all she did was lie with her head in hands, her thoughts elsewhere. She retorted rudely when their tutor called on her to answer a question.
It was temptation enough for him to approach her after class, when they broke up for recess. She eyed him as he walked up, her blueish hair worn down this time, her school uniform sloppy and untidy.
"You again?" Her voice was aggressive, but Hachiman couldn't help but think it had a rich timbre. "What did I say about not talking to me-"
"How did it go for you?"
"…" She shifted her feet, knowing exactly what he was talking about. Her tone remained aggressive. "What's it to you?"
It was his turn to go silent. In truth, he'd been compelled to ask because it didn't feel as if he could talk about it with anyone else. Hachiman had grown so used to internalising his problems, but all that had happened at the warehouse, with Sobu Boarding School, couldn't be discarded in the same way.
And his usual route for venting, Komachi, could only see the good side of things. Of course, if he was honest about his misgivings, she would be understanding, helpful: everything she always had been. The best sister in the world.
But he didn't want to ruin it. To spoil it. That pride.
So here he was.
"If you don't want to answer, then don't." Hachiman shrugged his head, regretting approaching her. "You're right. It's none of my business."
Her lips stayed sealed. He shrugged again and turned to go-
"I passed, if that's what you want to know."
"…"
"I bet you wanted to take the piss, thinking I failed, right?" She was back on the assault. "Well tough luck-"
"I passed too."
Kawa-something looked at him, waiting for the point. He didn't say anything more, and she threw her hands. "Great!" was the sarcastic quip. "Look at us, passing together! You want me to throw you a party or something?"
"It just doesn't feel real, is all." He snapped. "The way it all happened at the venue… It didn't feel right."
"I've got no idea what you're talking about." She shook her head one last time and then walked past him down the corridor, brushing her shoulder against his as she did. "Idiot."
Hachiman watched her go, realising that neither of them knew each other's name. He couldn't bring himself to be devastated about it.
Two schooldays after the application soon became four, then six, but the thought of their meeting with the Sobu Boarding School representative persisted. The man arrived so on the dot at 2PM, so to the millisecond, that it was unnerving. His parents showed him into the living room, bowing, offering him tea. He declined every pleasantry.
Hachiman followed them, disinclined. The talk of forms and confidentiality had irritated him so much that eventually he rose his voice, cutting over the chatter.
"The Second Stage of Application. What is it? Another test?"
The man had pushed his spectacles up his nose. "I'm afraid I'm not allowed to disclose any information about the Second Stage. This is school policy-"
"When does it take place?"
"Please refrain from asking any more questions. You will be emailed more information closer to the day."
"Then what is the point of all-"
"Hachiman! M- my apologies sir, ah… my son is just a little stressed about all this, as you can imagine."
"Yes." The glasses glinted harshly in the light. "I certainly can."
Soon, a full week had passed, and no word from Sobu Boarding School. No email. His parents asked him to check his computer as soon as he got back from school, every day, and to text them the news if they weren't home. Nothing. And he couldn't have been more relieved.
Perhaps Sobu Boarding School had forgotten about him. Perhaps there had been some bureaucratic issue, a fault in the processing, and the name Hikigaya Hachiman had slipped through the system. Perhaps he wouldn't have to go through with this after all.
Yeah. Like that's bound to happen, Hachiman thought to himself.
He was on his way back from school, the prospect of checking his emails again looming large. His method of getting to school most days was to cycle, but it had become common for the bike sheds outside the building to be stolen from. The theft of one locked up right next to his had convinced him it wasn't really worth it. Walking presented its own problem, with street crime on the rise, but it was only a twenty minute walk. If he were a girl, he would have had to think twice.
The evening was cool and mild, with a sunset of black and pink atop the Chiba skyline. He left his last class at the routine time and started the twenty minute trek, and at the end of that trek he hoped to once again be looking at an empty inbox on his computer screen.
Several times over the past few weeks, Hachiman had wondered if there was something wrong with him. There was being cynical and idiosyncratic- that was characteristic of him, to be sure, but any normal person should have been thrilled about this. He was on the verge of a place at Sobu Boarding School! His family were absolutely right: this would secure him any life, any whim, that he desired. It was the educational equivalent of a genie in a lamp.
Only the rest of the applicants at Aiya Warehouse had looked just as apprehensive when they left as he did. He remembered Kawa-something's face when he asked her what her results had been. For someone so clearly desperate to get in, she hadn't looked thrilled.
No. You didn't need good instincts or cynicism to see that Sobu Boarding School was different to any other. Wasn't it their responsibility to welcome prospective students, rather than put them off?
But then again, their results spoke for themselves. They didn't need to.
The sight of their local convenience store made Hachiman pause briefly. Komachi had asked him to pick up some extra food on the way back, and ducked inside to do so. By the time he left again, plastic shopping bag in hand, the temperature had noticeably dropped. Sunset was becoming twilight.
He kept walking, texting Komachi as he did. Got those groceries you asked fo-
Hachiman never finished typing.
There was a noise… something muffled, to his right hand side… It sounded like…
He stopped and looked around. There was an alley to his right, where the sound appeared to be coming from. It was narrow, hardly wide enough for two people, and recycling bins were lined up all the way down. The windows adjacent were barred up. An old building, abandoned.
He listened carefully… and there it was again. The sound of a person. A girl.
It sounded like they were moaning.
Hachiman quickly put his phone away. "… Hello?"
The sound disappeared. There was no response. Hachiman peered down, trying to make out shapes from the shadows in the alley. He called out again. Still nothing. Had he imagined it?
He was on the verge of continuing on when he heard the sound again. Only louder. The beginning of a word, which was then cut off. As if someone was preventing them from calling out.
"Help."
Hachiman didn't think twice. "Hello? Is someone there?" He ducked into the alley, shuffling past two of the recycling bins. The shadows grew more intense. Darker. But if someone needed him, if someone was injure-
"Turn around."
The voice, a male's this time, echoed from behind his back. He spun, stared, dead fish eyes wide with horror.
Two men in their twenties were knelt behind one of the recycling bins. Both looked normal. They wore jeans and simple T-shirts. Hachiman would have passed them on the street and not thought twice. But their eyes were cold and vicious, and beneath them, held face down on the concrete of the alley, was a schoolgirl. One of them was covering her mouth with his hand. The other was holding a knife.
Her shirt was unbuttoned, revealing her chest. A white bra lay discarded to the side and her skirt was pulled half way down. She stared at him with eyes more desperate, more panicked, than anything he had ever seen.
"Turn around," the man with the knife repeated, his voice terribly calm. "Leave now, and we won't hurt you too."
Hachiman stood still, mouth opened, unable to react. His eyes flittered from the knife, then to the men, then to the schoolgirl. He could feel her fear rolling off in her waves. She struggled beneath the grip, a hundred screams smothered by their hands, tears streaming down her cheeks.
He didn't know what to do. I should have called the police, as soon as I heard her. What the hell do I do-
"I'm not gonna say it again, kid. Turn around and leave, or I'll fucking kill you."
Hachiman found himself meeting the man's eyes. They were so still, so calm, as if this happened everyday, as if he'd done this a hundred time before. Hachiman felt the sweat his palms, the quiver in his legs. He felt compelled to listen, to do as he said-
But then he looked at the schoolgirl.
He saw that she needed him, more than anyone had ever needed him before. He saw a vision of the world he lived in, one where there were two kinds of people, only two, one being held down and the other with a knife, one killing and the other being killed.
He saw that world and he hated it. It filled him with disgust and revulsion.
The quiver in his legs disappeared. He felt resolve strengthen them. He knew what he was going to do.
As if giving in, Hachiman began to walk, very slowly, back the way he'd come. The two men came closer, within two metres, within a metre. The schoolgirl began to struggle more, shaking her head, wailing silent wails, as she watched him appear to leave.
"That's good kid. You just keep walkin-"
"Run!"
Hachiman's shout was directed at the girl. When the two men were as close as possible, he leaped forwards, barrelling straight into them. The weight of his body sent them sprawling, breaking their grip on the schoolgirl. She rolled away like a rabbit set free, and the scream came alive, louder than a round of artillery. She dashed to her feet and ran away.
Hachiman had intentionally leaped at the man with the knife first. In the moment of shock, he reached for the man's arm, trying to grip it, force the knife out. He'd never been in a fight before. He had no idea what he was doing. Instincts took over-
Instincts meant nothing.
They struggled together, Hachiman and the man, but the other reacted fast. He stood up and rushed forward, lashing out with his feet, kicking him in the stomach. Hachiman held onto the knife for as long as he could, before the pain buckled him over.
He let go. They were on him in an instant. Both were bigger, stronger. They kicked once, twice, three times, more than he could count. He spat out blood.
But the pain receded like it had never existed when he thought of the schoolgirl, the person's whose name he didn't know, and the way she had leaped up and dashed away, relieved of her torment.
I made the right choice, he repeated, as his body grew weak. I couldn't have done anything differ-
"Alright, that's quite enough."
The voice reverberated faraway, like the sound of a train in the distance. Hachiman wasn't sure he'd heard of it; the blurriness in his vision reduced everything to a haze. All his senses were dulled.
But the kicking stopped. The pain lingered, but the men pulled away. He coughed up more blood, stunned, and then a bright white light turned on behind him, illuminating the whole alleyway, blinding him.
He turned over onto his front, looking around in a daze. The scarlet colour of the blood that he'd spat out was intensified in the light. The two men, the two rapists, were looking down at him with an expression that seemed like…
Hachiman couldn't believe what he was seeing. Are they… are they impressed-
"Well done, Hikigaya-kun. Really, well done."
I recognise that voice…
Behind him, where the white LED light was shining, was the shape of a person silhouetted. As they drew nearer, and the blurriness in his vision fell away, he began to make the person out. They reached him, and offered him a hand.
A pair of spectacles glinted harshly.
It was him. The man that had come to his apartment about the Second Stage. And by his side… by his side was the schoolgirl. She was still half-naked, every facet of her body revealed by the LED, but she too was looking down at him, the terror and the fear wholly removed from her face, replaced with approval. With a smile.
"What the…" Hachiman rasped, coughing again. "What the fuc-"
"Take my hand, Hikigaya-kun. Let's get you up-"
"No. Don't touch me. What… what is this? What the hell just happened?"
"Oh come now, you must have realised by now…"
The man kept his hand outstretched, but re-adjusted his spectacles with the other.
"My name is Satoshi-san. I am an examiner for Sobu Boarding School, responsible for the Second Stage of Application: namely, Real Life Simulation. And you, Hikigaya Hachiman, have just passed with flying colours."
Hachiman blinked, trying to process what was happening. Every place that he'd been kicked ached, but a lump in his throat was developing, one of sickened disgust, one that hurt more than any of the blows.
"You're telling me… you're telling me that this was all just part of the application?"
"Yes," he explained, as if it was perfectly logical. "You see, Sobu Boarding School only accepts the very best. The creme de la creme, as the French would say. Intellectual and theoretical excellence is a given, which we test in the First Stage, but you need more than that to succeed at our institution… much more. And that applies to life as well, of course. So we also need to test how you react in real life scenarios, whether those be of imminent threat to yourself, or in this case, to another."
The man, Satoshi-san, was still holding out his hand as he spoke. "This happens to be Scenario 13- Sexual Assault, one of our most difficult. You, however, performed exceptionally. You showed ingenuity and deception in taking the attackers by surprise, as well as a strong desire to help your fellow human beings. I could fail you for this, given the importance we place on self-preservation… Abandoning the schoolgirl is a perfectly valid response, in my opinion, so long as it's done with authority. Others attempt to participate in the assault, which shows an admirable sense of opportunism, but in your case…" He shook his head. "There was enough determination and initiative on show to persuade me of your merits."
"…" Hachiman tried to speak through ragged breaths, but couldn't. His tongue was tied. He couldn't quite believe it- the extent that this school was willing to go…
"Hikigaya Hachiman. It is my personal pleasure to offer you a place at Sobu Boarding School. You have taken your opportunity with both hands."
At this Satoshi-san, his examiner, began to clap. The rapists and their supposed victim did too. They all smiled at him, offering him their congratulations.
Hachiman felt as if he was going to be sick.
"This is… this is beyond… How can you do this? How can you stand there and clap?" Fury began to ripple through him. "You bastards-"
"Now now," the examiner said, all too used to placating his subjects. "Anger is a normal response in this situation. It's understandable. But the Second Stage of Application is crucial; a person only shows who they truly are when they think no one's looking. Sobu Boarding School is willing to let you digest things, consider them rationally, and then get back to us."
He removed a thin business card from his pocket and dropped it at Hachiman's feet. "This is my number. Please call this immediately if you wish to accept your place at Sobu Boarding School. You have twenty four hours to deliberate on this decision. If you do not respond in this timeframe, we will revoke your offer. Understood?"
Hachiman swore under his breath again, trying to find the strength to get to his feet, to charge this repulsive man and beat some morality into him. But the glasses only flashed coldly as he turned around and walked back towards the floodlight. The actors in his twisted theatre followed him.
"I strongly suggest you accept, Hikigaya Hachiman." He smiled thinly. "If not, you will regret it for the rest of your life."
The floodlight turned off and the examiner disappeared. Hachiman sat there, immobilised, submerged in the darkness of the alley.
Sunset had passed. It was night-time over Chiba.
1.5
"Onii-chan?"
His sister's voice, no louder than a whisper, reached out to him under the door. Hachiman's bedroom door was locked. It had been from the moment he got back.
When he first entered, Komachi had bounded up to him, asking about the groceries, ready to tell him about her day. The sight of him covered in grime, bloodstains splashed on his uniform and his face like the strokes of an artist, had turned her mood upside down.
He'd ducked her questions, her worry, still in shock, in disbelief. He'd locked himself in his room, thankful that his parents weren't home yet, and lain on his bed, staring up at the ceiling aimlessly.
The memories were weak and fuzzy, as if he'd awoken from a nightmare. The two men. The knife. The schoolgirl, held down, all but naked on the floor. The horror on her face, artificial, fake. The glinting of Satoshi-san's glasses.
It was a horrible nightmare. That's all it was. A horrible nightmare.
Hachiman was wrong, of course. It was only the beginning of one.
An hour and a half later was when Komachi tried to approach him again. She knocked on his door, nervous.
"Onii-chan…? Please talk to me…"
"…"
"I'm so worried, Onii-chan, I… I just want to know what happened. Were you mugged?"
If anyone could break him out of the trance, it was his sister. There was no one Hachiman loved more. Sighing with exhaustion, he stood up and opened the door.
Wordlessly, they sat down next to each other, leaning against Hachiman's bed, waiting for the other to speak. The silence was long and drawn out. Komachi wrapped her arms around him, held him tightly. She left and came back a couple of times with a wet towel to clean his face. She asked him if he wanted to change out of his uniform. He didn't answer.
"Please tell me what happened, Onii-chan. Just so I can help you."
"…"
"It doesn't have to be right away. I'll just stay with you till then-"
"It was Sobu Boarding School."
"What?"
He sighed again. "The Second Stage of Application. For Sobu Boarding School."
Hachiman told her everything. How he'd been picking up her shopping when he heard the sound of a girl in trouble. How he barrelled into the men assaulting her only to find out it was all a scam. A trick to test how he handled a 'Real Life Simulation'. He told her about Satoshi-san, showing her the business card.
Komachi stayed quiet for the longest time, sometimes on the verge of speaking, sometimes her mouth sealed shut.
"… Did you…" She trailed off.
"What?"
"… Did you pass?"
Hachiman blinked. "Does that really matter? Shit, Komachi-"
"No, it's just…" His sister shook her head, emotion plain across her face, and rested her cheek against his shoulder. He accepted the embrace, the feeling of someone he cared about against him.
"You said that it was a scenario. A Real Life Simulation. Right?"
He nodded.
"…" She laughed humourlessly. "I wonder what I'd do in that position."
"The same thing. I know you Komachi, and you know me."
"I'd certainly like to think that. It's probably true. But… I know this sounds horrible, but… I could only be sure that I'd intervene if it was your life on the line, Onii-chan."
"…"
"In a perfect world, I'd intervene for anyone. But in the one that we live in, it's always the people we love that most that matter. That we have to look out for. The thought of you, or Oto-san, or Kaa-san…" Komachi sniffled. "I can't even bear the thought of that."
"What are you trying to say, Komachi?"
"… It's just…" She could hardly force out the words. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but… I just want you to have a good life, Onii-chan. I want you to be the best you can possibly be. I don't want you to live a life where you can't get a job, where you can't make ends meet… And you know that's what it will be like. For both of us. And if you can avoid that..."
"…"
"I just don't want you to become the person with a knife at their throat. That's why I think… that's why I think you should-"
"Komachi… Why are you saying this? Why are you still saying this, after everything I've just told you!?"
Hachiman couldn't keep the aggression out of his voice. It was the frustration of the past few weeks, of hearing his family's praise and seeing their pride, and now, not wanting it. It came out in his voice, quiet and yet strong.
His sister went silent again, but he felt the opposite pull to him, the opposite feeling, in their embrace. He felt her disagreement.
"Just think about it… You have twenty four hours to think about it, right Onii-chan? Just sleep on it. For me…?"
The silence became them. Soon, Komachi left his room, bidding him good night, offering to get him a hot drink before he fell asleep. Hachiman shook his head. He'd thought the talk with his sister would relieve the pains and the aches in his chest. So much for that.
It was apparent immediately that he wouldn't be sleeping easy. The darkness in his bedroom was too reminiscent of the alleyway, the glimmer of streetlights beneath his curtain too like the white LED of the floodlight.
Twenty four hours. He had twenty fours to decide what kind of person he was. Selfish or unselfish. Cruel or kind.
Hachiman knew that the bet with Oto-san meant nothing. He knew that his sister's urging meant nothing. He'd wanted to make his family proud, like any eldest son, and that had motivated him, but the Second Stage went beyond any hollow motivations. He couldn't hide behind them as justification.
Sobu Boarding School was a horrible place- would be a horrible place. The institution, who made rape and crime into an exam, and the students who attended it too. The revulsion that swelled in his throat when he thought of the way they'd exploited his morality, tested it, was agonisingly real.
Of course, he had no idea what the school was like in person, but in Hachiman's eyes that was irrelevant. It didn't matter if it was just like any other school past the point of application. It didn't matter even if it was worse than the application.
Sobu Boarding School had given him a very simple choice.
He could win by the system's rules. Or he could lose.
By the time he fell into a stuttering, disturbed sleep, Hachiman had already made his choice.
Morning sunbeams burnt through the curtains. There was no bird song outside, but the sound of cars and public transport was a warning to everyone that, regrettably, another day had begun.
Hachiman was wide awake. He had been since 5PM.
His mobile phone lay on his lap, open to the keypad, ready for a number to be typed in. The business card of Satoshi-san was beside it.
Ring Ring. Ring Ring. Ring Rin-
"Good morning. This is Satoshi-san speaking, on behalf of Sobu Boarding School. How may I help you?"
"… It's Hikigaya Hachiman."
"Yes? And what is your response?"
"…"
"Excuse me, I don't think I heard you? The connection might be breakin-"
"I accept. I accept the place at Sobu Boarding School."
And in all seventeen years of his life, Hikigaya Hachiman had never despised himself more.
Sobu Boarding School- Student Profile
Name: Hikigaya Hachiman
Student No: 106371
First Stage of Application Score: 48/50
Second Stage of Application Comments: Performed strongly in Scenario 13- Sexual Assault. Showed qualities of initiative, determination and deception. Showed detriment of selflessness.
Status: Accepted Place