Cersei aimed too high, and the vase shattered above her pathetic cousins shivering head. "You simpering little worm!" She seethed and showed her claws. Somehow, this was his fault. The plan was perfect and brilliant, befitting a daughter of Lord Tywin a dolt could have carried it out. He's not even as keen as a dolt. Why am I doomed to be surrounded by idiots and fools? How complicated was unleashing a rabid badger from the treeline? And the claim it wasn't rabid was a poor lie by Lancel to make up for his failure. I saw for myself the foam on its mouth.
Did the Reynes vex you so, father? Cersei wondered.
"Please, my queen I-"
She struck him with a slap that had his head spinning. "I did not give you leave to speak."
Cousin Lancel bristled, and she saw the misstep. One shouldn't pull the tail of a lion too much, even a weakling like Lancel, and she softened her expression. "I hurt you." Her voice as soft as silk. "I'm sorry cousin. It's just Robert is such a brute." Fake tears, the sword of a woman formed, and she wept.
"Fret not my queen." Lancel said, coming to her side like the simpleton he was. "We shall deliver you from such a beast. I swear it by the Father." He pressed up against her and it was clear what he desired. She brushed her lips against his own and claimed him with a kiss that burned. His skin reddened as she shoved him down like he was her prey. "Your grace!" He protested as she placed a finger on his lips. Her strands of golden hair falling down around them as she leaned down.
"Once Robert is gone, we can be together. Fully. Completely." And placed a gentle kiss between his neck and shoulder. "But that is for being so brave." The groan that escaped him and his withering body told her she had secured her cousin once more.
"Do you have another plan, my queen?" Lancel asked.
"Of course." She lied.
Lancel raised a brow. "What is it?"
It thinned her smile that he pressed it. "You'll see soon my gallant cousin." And after another quick kiss, he quickly forgot it.
At the feast, Cersei dressed in a beautiful crimson dress that drew eyes, jealous eyes from women, and appreciative stares from men. A Lannister should always be the center of attention, but she wasn't basking in the sheep's adoration. Robert acted a complete fool, deep in his cups, tittering around in his chair like a drunkard. A golden crown resting on his head was the only thing kingly about him. She could barely hide a sneer. How does this man best me? How can he escape every plot with nay a cut on him?
Robert belched.
She scoffed furiously. Her hands gripped the silverware, with her skin turning white as she saw him and smiled. He was clad in the white of the kingsguard. It should be crimson. Her twin. Her other half almost as perfect as herself. Jamie took up his post with his other sworn brothers. He winked at her.
A smirk formed. Enjoy yourself oaf. When you are passed out drunk in bed dreaming of a dead woman, I'll be making love with Jamie next to you. It excited her greatly and she could hardly wait for the feast to be over with. The company was terrible. The fat trout and her ugly brat sat next to her. Being the wife of the Hand protocol dictated Lady Arryn should sit next to her. Robert Arryns mismatched eyes wandered over her as he sucked on Lady Arryns tit.
"My lords and ladies!" The old falcon said, raising a glass. "Loyal friends of the Realm. Our noble king has gathered us here to celebrate the anniversary of the Trident. While we drink of such heroism, let us remember the fallen by honoring our pledge to keep a more peaceful realm. A more noble one, built on friendship and brotherhood. Not fear and fire." His voice was kind and his eyes twinkled with some amusement. "It's my distinct honor to keep this pledge." He paused, and all the fools gazed like pigeons following his every word. "Lord Tyrell has accepted the proposal for his son Loras to squire with Prince Renly. I bid you to welcome him into the kings court."
Prince Renly stood and waved with a smile. "Tis true Lord Hand. He shall be a Knight of Flowers."
"THE BOY RIDES WELL! THAT'S FOR SURE!" Robert roared, clapping as he did so. And when a king clapped, everyone joined in.
Strangely, Prince Renly seemed embarrassed. " Yes, and he shall bring great honor to us all. Come, stand with me Loras." The boy was slender as a reed with brown curls that dim maidens would find pleasing. He bowed and showed all the courtesies expected from the Reach. "Your grace, I'm thrilled with this honor to prove myself."
"And so you shall, boy!"
The clapping grew in volume, bouncing off the walls as Lord Arryn let out a cheer. "To King Robert the First of His Name!"
"To King Robert! Long may he reign!" They chanted.
Lords and Ladies from the Stormlands seemed pleased by the news that the Tyrells were finally being welcomed back into the fold except Lord Stannis, whom was grinding his teeth. Something she shared with the dullard, but unlike him, she hid it masterfully. How dare they allow the roses a foot in? House Tyrell had always hung in the shadow of Lannister and now they were wrapping their vines around the stags as if they were truly competitors. Do they think me a fool? I see the game they play. First it was a fostering, then a betrothal, positions at court and the banners of roses would hang over the bannisters.
This is our destiny, you up jumped stewards! She wanted to roar.
Robert had to die before they ensnared him any further before they set aside her or they betrothed her precious Joffrey to that hideous girl from Highgarden.
"My Queen." Loras Tyrell said, bowing before her.
"How courteous." She kissed the back of his hand.
"Jon!" King Robert said. "Start the entertainment before I piss myself from boredom."
Lord Arryn sighed and gave a disinterested wave of his hands. Drums roared as the performers strolled on the raised stage. Servants drew curtains back. A man dressed in the furs of the north, a dark-haired woman with a simple dress laced with blue roses, and a tall man built like a giant with a golden cape around his thick neck. "We shall be brothers soon." The man in furs said solemnly.
"As it was always meant to be." The tall man grinned, and they embraced before he departed. The woman approached love struck, reaching for his hands and swooning." Oh, I love you Lord Robert. How I wish to wed." Before pausing, teary-eyed and twisting away.
"Speak my lady, what ails you."
"I can't."
"Fear not. I'm as strong as a stag, as fierce as the storm. Speak your worries, my lady love. I shall protect you from whatever lies ahead."
The woman gave an exaggerated twirl. "It's the dragon." She collapsed into his broad chest. As the chorus cried out. "The DRAGON! THE DRAGON! AS DARK AS NIGHT! IT FLIES! IT BREATHES FLAMES AS HOT AS THE SUN! THE DRAGON! THE DRAGON!" He wrapped her tightly around him as she shuddered.
"The prince would never dare. It would violate the laws of the gods." The man declared. "Worry not, my blue rose. In one moon I shall return and we shall live happily ever after. Wait for me." Hands slowly untangled.
"I shall always wait for you."
Robert was sobbing like a girl, moaning about his precious Lyanna. The proud warrior and hunter reduced to tears by the performance. Jon Arryn was close to his side, worriedly whispering some words? He didn't know about the performance and when she looked around; it seemed Lord Renly was aghast. Of the Small Council members, only Lord Estermont, the Master of Coins' chest puffed up with pride as he clapped. He did this and would suffer the king's wrath and the Hands displeasure.
The man left the stage as the music shifted to a sinister sound. A tall man wearing a white wig jaunted to center stage with a villainous sneer. Dressed in black plate, he paced like a beast in a suit of arms. "I shall never let cousin Robert be happy. A dragon takes what it sees. By Fire and Blood. I shall have the wintery rose as another bride. Her tears and protests shall mean nought. Come Arthur, we have a maiden to seize."
Ser Arthur sighed. "My prince, this is without honor. You mustn't."
"A dragon cares not for honor. Now quiet and do as bid."
Curtains close as the scene ends. The room was as quiet as a tomb no one dared even to gulp less Robert explode.
The woman that played Lyanna Stark emerged humming a song. A tapestry of a river behind them. Northman wearing furs became a wall around her as the music shifts from a peaceful tune to a dark drumbeat. A man fell as if struck by an arrow. "Run Lady Lyanna! "She went wide eyed picking up her dress and ran left only for a figure wearing the white of the Kingsuard blocking her path. "But you are of the Kingsuard!" She cried out. "A knight of great valor and chivalry."
"I'm sorry fair maiden, but I must follow my commands." He said, conflicted.
Panicked, she turned the other way as the last guardsman collapsed to the ground. Running into Prince Rhaegar, whom grinned at his prize. "Let me go! Let me go!" He dragged her kicking and screaming. "Help me Robert!" She wailed despondently.
"Oh, Robert cannot find you. I shall take you to where no one shall hear your screams."
King Robert's sobbing ceased, his face darkened and bubbled with fury. "ENOUGH! FUCKING DRAGONSPAWN! I"LL KILL EVERY LAST ONE OF THEM!" Men of the Kingsguard bristled and prepared to cut down anyone at Robert's wish. Tension in the room could be cut with a knife. Jon Arryn was whispering, trying to calm his petulant ward. "We'll deal with this later." He promised. "Be a damn king."
He sat back down, grumbling.
The actor playing a significantly more handsome Ned Stark returned with his brother in all but name. "Where is Lyanna? I like this, not Robert. She has not returned."
"I grow weary too Ned." He agreed as they came across the scene. "Her guard is slain! LYANNA!" He fell to his knees in grief.
"Robert, one still lives." The Northman said, taking a knee.
"Who did this?" The man demanded. "Speak now. We must find this villain. Speak, oh valiant man of Winterfell."
"Prince Rhaegar." The guardsman croaked, head falling limp as the chorus sang again. "The DRAGON! THE DRAGON! AS DARK AS NIGHT! IT FLIES! IT BREATHES FLAMES AS HOT AS THE SUN! THE DRAGON! THE DRAGON!"
The larger man rose with fury in his eyes. "The dragon he may be, but I am the storm. Brother, will you venture with me to the lair of the dragon? No doubt its certain death. I will feel no less of you if you cannot." Ned Stark embraced him, removing that doubt.
"Always Robert. Let's return my sister home or die in the attempt."
"For Lyanna." They both said in agreement.
They returned with banners of a Stag, direwolves, trout, and falcon painted behind them. Dozens of knights with different sigils stood with him, following the man with an antlered helm. "Loyal men! True Knights, I bid you forward to all that is good in this world. March with me. March to fight the dragon."
"We shall not!" They chanted in unison.
"For what reason?" He asked.
"We need a king that's not a dragon. They have oppressed us like tyrants burning our sons and daughters. Be our king, oh Storm Lord. Be our king and we shall fight."
"I DID THIS NOT FOR A CROWN! ONLY FOR MY BLUE ROSE!" He crossed his arms. "A crown is a heavy thing, uncomfortable and irksome. I care not about such things. Make Ned your king. He is as true a man as any."
"Brother." Ned Stark said. "I cannot. I'm built for the cold, not the heat of the south. I'll melt. It must be you."
The man paced and raved before drawing his sword. "Very well, for Lyanna I shall be your king."
"King?" A scoff rang out. "Only a dragon can be king cousin." As Prince Rhaegar appeared with his host of white knights and spearmen dyed with bright yellow tunics. "This shall be the end of you Robert."
"YOU FIEND! YOUR VILLANY IS AT AN END! TRUE KNIGHTS! NED! CHARGE!" It was laughable the fight sequence that followed. Lords and knights were rolling their eyes at the fight while it enchanted all the ladies. The actor who played Robert smashed Rhaegar to the ground with a single blow, earning a loud gasp from the crowd. Rubies flew towards the audience. "What are your final words, villain? Say them."
"Lyanna will always be mine. A crown you may take, but the blue rose shall be lost forever."
The hammer struck him again, and the actor playing Robert breathed heavily and dropped to his knees, addressing them all. "The villain lies, surely. Or mayhap he speaks truth? No, I refuse to accept such. I shall see my lady again." Turning around. "Ned, to me. The villain is slain, but we must find Lyanna."
Only for him to clutch his chest and collapse. Ned Stark at his side like a faithful hound. "Not you Robert. Your wounds are great. I shall find my sister. You must rest. I'll handle the Sword of the Morning. Nothing shall stop me, for Winter is Coming."
"Oh, Ned brother, not of blood. I can still fight."
"It shall not move me, my noble friend. I swear I shall return Lyanna."
The actor lowered his head. "Then go, my friend. Dally no longer."
The scene shifted again as the Northman faced the figure clad in white. "Oh, Stark of Winterfell. I'm truly sorry for such violence that has been witnessed, but I'm bound by honor to obey to my great shame."
"Tis a sad story. But the Gods and laws of men demand I rescue my sister. Let us fight with honor. Ice against dawn."
"So it ends."
"So it ends." Ser Arthur agreed. They danced around fighting with blades, both of them seemed to know what they were doing, moving as quickly as actual knights. When Eddard Stark cut him down with a mock blow. "And so I've lost." The man said. "My honor upheld. But at what cost? What shall they say of me?"
The Northman eased him down. "You were a true knight in the employ of a dark master. I fault you not. One day a new Dayne shall bring the dawn. I shall bring your bones back to your home. I so swear on my honor." Ser Arthur passed with a small smile on his face. And with that, Ned Stark ran off shouting. "LYANNA! LYANNA!" And the scene shifted as he came upon her. The actress was sickly and pale. "Is that truly my brother?" If only her end was so painful.
"It is sister. I shall take you home to Robert."
"Oh, is Robert well? How I love him."
"He is well. He slew the villain and is eager to see his bride."
She reached out for his hand. "Oh, my simple Ned. I shall not long live I fear. I feel the Stranger coming to take me."
"No." He shook his head." You shall marry Robert and be happy with many children by your hearth."
The woman shook her head sadly and wiped away his tears. "Cry not Ned. Promise me such."
"You would leave me a lone wolf?" Bitterness mired his speech. "Stay for me. Stay for Robert."
A gentle smile formed on her face as her hand went limp. " Lyanna?" He asked. "Lyanna?" He asked again, his voice heartbroken as he began shaking her to no avail. After a long moment, he rose. "They will say Ned Stark lived this day that he triumphed over the great Ser Arthur, but they are fools. For Ned Stark died this day." The actor bowed and departed the stage.
The actor playing Robert stepped onto the stage wearing a crown. "I've won the war. The villain slain at my own hands and yet can I claim such a victory without my Lyanna? I know not. I truly know not, but I'm happy the dragons are dead. At least in that I Robert has won."
They directed all the actors to Robert, whom had crumpled two goblets of bronze. The food at his table uneaten. His face darkened as he gazed at Rhaegars actor. He was like a brooding storm before laughing. "FUCK ME! THAT WAS DAMN GOOD!" He patted Rhaegars actor to the ground as strong as a blow of his war hammer. "GODS I JUST WANTED TO KILL YOU!"
"Eh, thank you your grace."
And with that, the oaf shamed her when he kissed Lyanna Starks' actress hands. "You look just like her. A damn fine woman as free as the northern wind."
"Your grace." She curtsied.
"Tis was a fine performance." Jon Arryn said. "Mayhaps, we should allow the evening to end with the dance?"
Robert smiled, staring at her lecherously, stripping her beneath his gaze. She might as well have been naked before him.
"Your grace, your command?" Jon Arryn asked again.
"Yes, let's dance." Taking the womans hand, she blushed profusely as he led her in a bumbling dance.
Jon Arryn silent at the slight to her.
Cersei held an icy look. Dance with her Robert, when you tire of her, I'll see her dead like all the others.
Jamie would have comforted her, but he was at his post, chained by his oaths. Fools offered to dance with her, including Loras Tyrell, whom she told off with icy courtesy. The night was proving incredibly dismal when the man still dressed with a white cloak approached with a devilish grin. "You seem unhappy Queen of the Andals."
"Careful, ser. I'm the queen, I can have my husband take your tongue."
He placed a hand on his chest. "And so fiery. I meant no offense." He said. "Yet, my curiosity is peaked what troubles you so."
Cersei scoffed. "You think I would tell someone as low as you."
"No one is as high as me." He boasted. "Yet, I'm no one and everyone. Playing a role as old as the gods."
His cryptic words had her temper flaring. She wondered how much he would boast in the cells as they removed his fingernails. "Valar morghulis," he said, placing a coin in her hands, stifling the urge to see him flayed.
She paused for a moment and raised her brow. "What is this?"
"A sign of my favor from my god, the many faced god." He winked and the facade of confident actor chipped away and revealed the killer she saw on stage. A ruthless glint that made her smile.
"What use would I have for such favor?"
He turned away from her with disinterest.
"Wait!" Her voice filled with eagerness. "Where are you going?"
"To await your fond wish and the payment. I'm staying at the Sleeping Maiden." And left her without another word and she sipped some wine.
Later on that night, after passionate lovemaking with her twin. He took her hard against the wall while Robert slept. Yet despite the satisfied feeling between her legs, all she could think of was the coin and the man with the dangerous glint in his eyes. He was beautiful in a rugged way. "Valar morghulis," He had promised her with a predatory glare that made her lick her lips. She removed her naked form from the sheets and reached for the coin. Was this truly a faceless man?
It could be the answer to the oaf. Cersei mused as she poured herself a cup of wine and drank. Or a trick.
But with such incompetent men like Lancel around, it was tempting. Not even Roberts luck could outwit a faceless man.
If the coin was real…
Cersei strolled into the stuffy room dressed as befitting a queen. The room was filled with parchment and ink. "Your gr-ace." The old fool tittered the grand maesters chain clang from the movement," I didn't expect you if I had-"
"No matter." She said and tossed him the coin. "Tell me what this is?"
Pycelle's face turning white as his beard was the only answer she needed and turned with a satisfied smile. Soon you shall be with your precious Lyanna after all, but I must be shrewd. How would she orchestrate this? No involvement could come back to herself. Joffrey's reign had to begin without incident. A name is all she had to provide, and then he would name a price. But she couldn't leave the Red Keep, nor send for such a man. She would have to communicate via a messenger.
"Wait-" He called after her, but she ignored the old man and whatever pathetic counsel he would offer. A Lannister of the Rock didn't take counsel from gutless men. She sent word to Vylarr and handed him the missive with the crimson wax seal of House Lannister plastered on the parchment.
After supper and she had sent her two youngest off to bed, Vylarr returned bowing like a proper servant. She snatched the response out of his hand.
Fair queen, to kill a king is quite the price, but for such a beautiful radiant woman I shall lower it to 100,000 kings coin. You shall pay half upfront, the rest upon completion of the contract. When the bells ring from the Great Sept you shall know him to be dead."
Cersei was giddy with excitement. A paltry hundred thousand was a small price to pay for Roberts demise. I've spent worse on other schemes.
"Wait here." She said, writing a quick response and instructions. "Give this back to them and you follow this to the letter." Her voice hardened, warning of the price of failure.
Vylarr nodded and bowed.
The moon was high above them when she heard the bells ring. She stepped out onto the balcony and heard the beautiful sound as men beneath her ran around in alarm. Robert is dead… And she poured herself another glass of wine and sipped, smiling. Soon Joffrey would be king, and they would name her regent and everyone would bow to her. The Arryns, Tullys, Bratheons, all the lords and knights, would bow to her.
It's my time at last.
"Mother," the sweet voice of her daughter interrupted, peering through the doorway like a frightened doe. "What is going on? Has something happened?" Her youngest son was clutching her hand, small and afraid, following his sister like a lost duckling.
I forgot about them.
"I'm sure it's nothing sweetlings."
"Has something happened to father?" Myrcella asked.
Cersei shushed her. "Nothing is the matter." She stroked her beautiful blond curls. "And if something has happened, Joffrey will become king. We'll all be safe."
Myrcella looked saddened.
Tommen's voice as soft as a kitten. "I'm frightened mother."
She threw her arms around them and brought them in close. "Be brave my cubs." She said. "You can sleep in here tonight. How does that sound?"
They nodded their little heads and gave her kisses on the cheek. Tommen dozed off first under the covers as she stroked Myrcella to sleep. I'll protect my cubs, Cersei thought. Though when she allowed sleep to claim her, she dreamed of a golden crown on her brow as the bells of baelor sang a beautiful song.
A door slammed shut, stealing her from the strangers realm.
Who dares?
The large shadowy figured removed his boots, tall and fat, with a crown on his brow, that glistened even in the dark. The smell of ale lingered in the room. A ghost. She thought desperately.
"What are the children doing here, woman?" Robert said
Cersei almost screamed.
Far from the Red Keep sailing on, the Flying Boar men were clanging glasses of wine within the captains cabin. Two men cheered. One was himself the actor who played Robert, and the other the actor whom claimed to be a faceless man.
"SHE FELL FOR IT! HA!" the so called faceless man said with an enormous grin, but he knew him as Bal the greatest con artist in Essos and the Seven Kingdoms.
"I can't believe it Bal."
"Never doubt the classic faceless man, mummery." Bal said, playing with the gold between his fingers. "Look for a biter spiteful rich woman whom wants her husband dead. Helps if she's dumber than a nail."
He rolled his eyes. "She didn't seem stupid to me."
"Ah, but she thinks shes smarter and that makes her a dolt."
As they drank to their success, he thought of the warm beaches they would travel too. They had enough to retire easily in some manse. Or maybe they would pull off another con. They lived for the game and always wanted another score.
"To spiteful women." Bal proclaimed, one foot on the desk, as he stumbled drunk.
"To being rich!"
And there were worst faiths than being rich.
Authors Note: Next up Barry the Bold regrets life and lives up to his moniker.
MBB: Yeah, I had to believe Cersei was trying to kill Robert at least for a couple of years once Joffrey turned at least 12 I'd imagine she wouldn't have tried before then cause Robert was a good force of stability in keeping everyone in line. No one wants a long regency. I honestly, never thought about other other players plotting to kill Robert, but it certainly would be hilarious having Cersei and say Doran trip over ruin the others plan unintentionally. Now, a boar will appear eventually in a future chapter I promise.
Johannes293: Glad, you enjoyed it and he certainly is. It's a nice contrast to the other Lancel and Queen affair within Arthurian legend.