A wasteland. Neji could only use that word to describe what his life had been like for the past 300 years. Meeting Shukaku again, the rage and hatred were buried and forgotten, turning his wasteland into a warm and safe haven. The cold darkness he had traversed on his own for so long, the wounds he had accumulated, the lack of a place to belong, the exhaustion, the moment Shukaku touched him, the pain left him, bundled him in a blanket and provided him shelter.
But Neji could never fully rest. In his peace, there was a sense of unease. No matter how comfortable and promising the shelter provided was, if it was on the edge of a cliff that was slowly crumbling away, one would not help but worry.
After being battered so long, he did not want to leave it. Any shelter would have done. He embraced the feeling, ignored the warnings that tried to get through to him, and curled up. So what if the cliff was edging away, little by little. He was too tired to keep fighting. Hasn't it been long enough? He was ready to go to sleep.
Eventually the warnings quieted. They were still there, but Neji could no longer hear them, especially when Shukaku held him. Something would tell him, this was okay. Ignore it all. Focus only on the good memories. Just let him have control.
But then he heard a voice, reaching into his shelter, rousing him from his sleep-like state. The voice was familiar and soothing. It urged him to step away. Its call was a siren, and he could not resist, and when sweet ambrosia touched his lips, he could see how false his shelter was. Not a shelter, but a prison. The warmth that stood before him was not a shelter, but sanctuary. The person before him offered a warmth that could not be replicated. A truly safe place. A feeling of home and belonging.
"Neji."
That soft uncertain voice that spoke his name. Worried green eyes filled with nothing but concern for him. This was his, "Gaara." His mate. This was what having a mate was supposed to be like.
The urge to take his mate into his arms overwhelmed him. His blood was sweet. He wanted more. He shouldn't have ever let him go.
But he could not have him. Not yet.
He stabbed Gaara, letting him fall, seeing his confused expression as he hit the ground. Neji removed the sword swiftly and cleanly, turning his gaze to Shukaku.
Shukaku smiled at Neji who was holding Gaara's sword and was standing just behind where Gaara fell. "You missed his vitals, Neji-kun."
Neji stepped over Gaara, going to Shukaku. "It is better to let him die like this. Why let it be merciless when he insulted you."
Shukaku laughed. "That is the Neji-kun I remember. Gentle to me, but merciless to his enemies. I suppose that he will receive no help here."
"Being merciless towards my enemies." Neji stabbed his sword, through Shukaku's heart. "Is what I do best."
Rather than remove his blade, he sliced his way out of his chest, nearly cutting the torso in half.
"Neji," he growled, falling back. "What are you doing?"
"You think I would forgive you for hurting my mate? Trying to kill him. Manipulating me. Humiliating me." His voice was steady and even but his eyes were growing angrier and angrier. "And lastly, picking up another master after swearing your life and allegiance to ours. Did those tengu teach you qi techniques?" Neji cut off his arms before he could completely regenerate.
Shukaku laughed. "He was no longer my master when he tried to marry you off as if you were his daughter. You are mine Neji. You always were. Do you think that boy knows you better than me?"
Even bloodied and cut up, Shukaku only had his possessive eyes on him. Even now, he was trying to bring him to his side and manipulate him.
"You do understand me the best. You know me better than myself. You have always known what to say and do what needed to be done. Gaara-san does not know me well, but he is what I have been looking for and offers what I need, even if I am not aware of it. He has never tried to hurt me, even willing to give his life for me." He put his blade to Shukaku's neck. "And I was forced to stab him just so you could not."
With a flick of his wrist, he cut off Shukaku's head. His ex-lover's face was not one of fear but of victory. Like he still owned Neji. That any moment, he would come back to trap Neji again in his game of mind tricks and lies. Even in death, he could not let Neji rest.
He had no time to dwell on Shukaku. He went back to Gaara, who was sitting up, holding his bleeding stomach. Even if Neji missed his vitals, it was still a stab wound and had to be treated quickly. He took off his yukata, ripping the fabric into strips, and trying to bandage him with haste. "Do not move. You need to rest."
"Neji back?" Gaara replied weakly. His face was already pale, grabbing at Neji's arm weakly.
Neji took his hand, reassuring him that he was there. "Yes. Gaara's voice reached me," he kissed Gaara's cut wrist. "I am sorry. I have caused you so much pain, and yet you still did not through me away."
"My name. You said it." Even weak, Gaara tried to give him a soft smile.
Because it was Gaara's one request Neji never gave in to. This really was his mate. Their blood-coated fingers intertwined. "Sleep. I will take care of you, so do not fear."
"I … missed you," Gaara's eyes grew heavy.
"I also missed you," Neji whispered, putting his forehead to Gaara's. "My Gaara."
Neji stood in a pavilion, his hands on the railing, head hanging low. It was located in the middle of a large pond. The water was pure with large koi swimming just below the surface of varying colors. Lotuses floated on the top, giving it a peaceful and serene look. The moon reflected off the surface as thousands of fireflies danced just above the water, lighting the pond with their glow. In the distance all around him, he could see the illumination of the palace lights.
Beauty all around him, and he could not see it. appreciate it, staring into the water as he waited.
"Hyuuga."
Neji immediately straightened himself, turning to the deity that had called his name, he immediately bowed deeply. "Kurama-sama." He struggled to say no more to avoid overstepping with questions that lingered on the edge of his tongue.
The being that stood before him was not the Kurama he was acquainted with, but the father, the true ruler of Mt. Kurama and worshipped as a god. Rather than a name, Kurama was more of a title. A title that became their name. Only the ruling god and heir were allowed to have this name. Though the son seemed to have appropriated the name as it appeared he had no intention of taking over for his father.
This Kurama had a mostly human appearance as well except for the long silver hair, fox ears, eyebrows only a few centimeters long, and nine bushy tails. Despite the age and power he possessed, his aura was muted, mostly hidden; however, even hiding his powers, his elegance and authority could not be missed. The presence the father had did not compare to the son, and Neji wondered how he had ever confused the two.
"Your mate will be fine. The medicine took well. The spirit energy here will aid in his healing. You may take him back to the human world in two days."
"Thank you very much, Kurama-sama. I owe you greatly. My life would not be enough." The relief at hearing that turned his body to jelly. He fought the pull of gravity, maintaining his dignity, but he could not stop his body from shaking.
"You helped my troublesome son, and it was tengu from my mountain that has given you difficulties. Treating your human was merely paying what I owed."
"If you wished, you did not have to respond to my plea. For that, I am forever in your debt."
The god's ear twitched than the other. "You may see him if you like."
"If it does not trouble you…" Neji trailed off.
The fox god tilted his head slightly. "You should feed before you go. Your complexion is too pale."
"I wish to wait until he has awakened. If he is suffering, my needs are not important," Neji replied.
"Young ones these days are too stubborn. He will not rest easily if you do not take care of your body."
"I will consider doing so." Neji's responses had been short since arriving in the fox god's realm, only agreeing to everything the god had said to him. It reminded the god of a dog waiting sadly for his master's return. It had been difficult to keep any conversation between the two of them.
The god stood there awkwardly. Neji did not lift his head nor say anything else. "Then I will leave you be. Good night, Hyuuga."
Neji stayed bowed until the god left. When he righted himself, he went back to staring out into the pond. Gaara was going to get better. That was all that mattered to him. He exhaled heavily, running his hand through his hair. He didn't know how many times he had ruined his hair doing this.
"Master, may I join you." Uchiha's voice made Neji tense slightly, guilt prickling at the back of his head.
Neji turned his head to see Uchiha. His wounds had finally healed, and he must have eaten recently as his face had a little color. Though he looked worse for wear as well, his appearance of someone who was highly stressed by still had to work anyway. He had forgone his armor for once, being the first time in centuries that Neji had seen him without it. In his hands, he carried two sake bottles, holding them by the neck. "You may."
Uchiha joined him, leaning his behind against the railing and placing the jugs on it. He poured a cup of alcohol and offered it to Neji.
Neji took it, downing the cup quickly which Uchiha refilled as if ready for it.
He wanted to down the second cup, but refrained, not wanting to trouble his subordinate with constantly refilling his cup. Uchiha probably came to drink himself and offered out of duty, not because he wanted to.
Uchiha made no comment, just drinking in silence.
"If you wish to leave my service, I will allow it," Neji said in a soft voice. It was not the voice of a master. No pride or authority in his words.
Uchiha scoffed, throwing back a cup. "Do you think I would allow you off so easily? Until I die, I will be stuck by your side."
Neji's lip twitched upward a little, his chuckle self-deprecating. "Indeed, that may be a worse punishment for me."
Uchiha eyed him from the corner of his eye before looking forward. "I do not know what history you had with that man, but it was clear he had muddled your mind. If anyone asks, I saw and heard nothing of what transpired."
Uchiha was a good guard. Perhaps he was not as rude as had made him out to be to still be at his side after this incident. Only Uchiha thought to come check against orders, thinking perhaps the orders and Neji's behavior was off. He was grateful he had come with Gaara, but he was also angry he had allowed Gaara to go to such a place to begin with.
No, he should not blame Uchiha. It was his own fault Gaara ended up in that state. He forewent the cup, grabbing the bottle of alcohol, and drinking from it directly. At this point, what face did he have left in front of Uchiha anyway?
Surprisingly, Uchiha did the same, grabbing the second bottle and drinking from it, though not as fast as Neji. His mouth hovered over the jug his eyes unfocused as he thought of something. In a voice that wavered just a little, he asked, "Master, when can we return?"
"Is there someplace you must be?" Neji asked casually, letting the jug hang loosely between his fingers over the water.
Uchiha's squeezed the neck of the bottle too hard, shattering the ceramic and causing the rest to fall and shatter on the pavilion floor. His hand was twitching, but he put it in his sleeves, hiding them from view.
"Uchiha-san?" Neji asked, straightening his back a little with concern. Had he not healed properly? He only seemed to sustain minor cuts and bruises with his fight with the tengu and he had fed. Perhaps he had been poisoned by something.
"I… cannot breathe," he said, misery slipping into his normally stoic features. "Without Uzumaki…," he paused, "If I am away from him, it feels as if the air escapes me. The need to be at his side…"
He stopped, trying to suppress his feelings and regain control of himself. "I just wish to return as soon as possible."
Neji took another swig then passed the bottle over for Uchiha to drink. "Has it always been that way?" he asked. Why did Gaara and he not have this connection the other mates seemed to have?
"No. We hated each other at first. Argued frequently. We kissed during an argument, and something… clicked." He smirked, recalling the memory fondly. "Since then, if I do not hold him, make love to him…" Uchiha did not say more. He did not need to. His expression said more than enough. It was as if it was physically painful to stay away as the need continued to grow inside him.
"You may return first. I will return with Gaara on my own."
"Do not try to be a kind master now. It does not suit you."
Neji chuckled a little. "If I was not kind, your head would have rolled many times over." His eyes wandering to the palace walls across the pond. The only room that had a dim flickering light. His mood became dower as he asked, "Could you wait two more days?"
"If that is what the young master needs, I cannot say no." Uchiha finished off the bottle.
His gaze stayed lingering on the room across the pond. He should be there. Not here. "Thank you, Uchiha-san. I will compensate you well when we return."
Uchiha bowed as his master passed him by. "Thank you, Hyuuga-sama."
Hyuuga inhaled deeply, feeling a tightness in his own chest. It seemed he could not rest without seeing Gaara himself. Finally gathering his nerve, he went to Gaara's side.
Light fell over Gaara's face, rousing him from his slumber. He grunted in pain, his body tensing and making the pain worse. Right, Neji had stabbed him.
He struggled to open his eyes, feeling as if they had been glued shut. A battle ensued to open them, only to close again from the pain of his pupils constricting quickly. This feeling was familiar. Was this the fourth or fifth time he was stabbed? He did not know if he should consider himself lucky to always survive or unlucky for being stabbed so many times. He was starting to get used to it.
He knew it would be a bad idea to sit up from experience. Honestly, he did not feel too bad. The pain was more akin to being severely sore. Considering where the wound was, he should be in worse pain. Instead, he was hungry and quite thirsty. His tongue feeling rough and dry.
His surroundings looked familiar. The ceiling, the smell of the room, the blankets and pillows around him, he was back in his room in the Hyuuga manor. How did they manage to transport him back in his state? How much time had passed? It had been a 10 trip out on horseback. To bring him back would take much longer if they took a carriage or wagon.
He turned his head, trying to see if Haru or some other servant was at his side. Instead, he saw Neji, sleeping upright at his bedside. His head was bowed as soft snores escaped him from the uncomfortable angle. His face was severely pale, almost ash in color. He looked tired with the darkness under his eyes and his hair not groomed as usual.
Gaara felt happiness and relief spread through his chest. It had not been a dream. Neji had come back to him. Still, he needed something to drink, the inside of his mouth was like sandpaper.
He debated whether or not to wake Neji. Deciding Neji looked tired enough, he tried to sit up, hoping to locate a servant to fetch him something. He grunted with effort, finding his body was still lacking strength even with the muted pain.
A strong hand supported his back, helping him sit up. "Are you in pain?" Neji's gentle voice asked him.
"Wa—r." Gaara's mouth stuck together, and his tongue felt thick and heavy, not cooperating with him. Neji seemed to understand what he was asking for, reaching beside him for a jar that had a spout that Gaara had not seen before. Neji brought the spout to his lips, allowing Gaara to drink without worrying about spilling it. He drank greedily until the last drop was gone and still, he wanted more.
"I will have someone procure you more." Neji started to get up, but Gaara grabbed his sleeve weakly. Neji could easily slip out of his grasp but stopped waiting for Gaara's request.
"Are you hungry?" Gaara asked.
His question seemed to make Neji uncomfortable. "Do not worry about me." His did not change towards him, but it appeared he wanted to avoid answering as well. "Your wound is not completely healed. You should keep resting."
Neji was right. Now that he had hydrated some, he was getting tired again. Sitting up had drained more of his energy than he thought. Neji held his hand as he helped him lay back down. Gaara looked into his eyes. That ominous look he had before was gone. They were a clear molten silver, the eyes he had grown familiar with and fell in love with. "You should eat," Gaara said again.
Neji smiled a bit. He brushed Gaara's hair away from his eyes, his touch feather light. "Even now you worry for me. Sleep, and I will eat."
"Promise?"
"Promise."
Hearing his promise, Gaara felt sleepy. He thought he saw Neji kiss his palm, but he could not be sure as his eyelids drooped.
"Good night, Gaara."
Gaara drifted in and out of sleep for a couple of days. When he woke, he would see Neji at his side, but when he was finally managed to stay awake for a decent amount of time, Neji was gone, replaced by Haru.
Haru begged for his forgiveness for not protecting him properly. Gaara did not understand why he would do so. Haru had jumped in front of a blade for him. Without his sacrifice, he would not be here.
Apparently, it had only been four days since the incident, yet his wound was almost healed. Natsu came to serve alongside Haru a day later, and thanked Gaara for bringing Neji home. He had to get used to both of them serving him, finding it eerily creepy how well they worked together without saying a word. Natsu, like Haru was good at his work, but he lacked the confidence, treading lightly around him as if he felt guilty. But if Natsu was serving him, then who was serving Neji?
Gaara also found an increased number of guards outside his room. When Haru and Natsu accompanied him on short walks to stretch his legs, the guards would follow him and show him almost the same level of respect they gave to Neji. It was strange and a little uncomfortable as he did not even get so much respect and attention in the palace.
But he did not see Neji. Was he avoiding him again? The thought hurt, but he could understand why. He was avoiding his brother as well who had been staying somewhere in the mansion. Strangely, he had not seen hide or tail of his brother. He could only assume it was the guards watching over him that had kept him away. He could not say he was not grateful. After what happened, he was sure his brother would try to get him out of the country as quickly as possible. He wasn't ready to have that conversation yet. He still did not know what he was going to do.
At times, he thought he heard his brother outside, asking to be let through, but it was always silenced quickly, making him wonder. When he asked the twins about his brother's condition, they told him he was healthy and being taken care of as an honored guest. He had no reason to believe they were lying. If they did not want him to know something they would often skirt the issue or not respond at all to just avoid lying to him.
As he recovered, he played music, happy to have the strings underneath his fingertips, that it wasn't the last time he could play. He hoped it would draw Neji back to see him, but he did not come.
He sighed, stopping his practice.
"Is something wrong young master?" Natsu asked. "Should I retrieve your medicine?"
"I am alright. It does not hurt much." Gaara placed his hands in his lap. "Am I like you? I healed too quickly."
"Young master is younger master," Haru replied. "We could never compare to the young master."
A perfect servant answer, skirting the answer as well. Gaara was not too keen on them avoiding his questions, so he tried for a different question. "What is your age?"
"Sixteen, young master," Haru replied.
"When were you born?" he asked, knowing Haru was trying to find a loophole.
The twins looked at each other, having that silent conversation between them again. "We are 73 years old," Natsu answered.
Seventy-three? Did they stop aging? Were they created like this? Or did they simply age slower than normal humans? Whenever he discovered something non-human about them, he was wary because of his religion but curious as well. He could not help but want to learn more.
"And Neji?" he asked, looking at them expectantly.
The twins side-eyed each other once more. As always, they took more time deciding whether or not to divulge their master's secrets. He thought they would keep silent on the matter as it was personal, but it was to his surprise that it was Natsu who spoke once more. "He is 332 this year."
It was truly an amazing thought. Gaara had grown up hearing about legends of people who had looked for the great panacea, who committed many atrocities, looking for ways to cure their illnesses and extend their life. To find a way to live forever. These people really did live forever. Neji had always referred to him as a child. In comparison, he really was. Was that why Neji would not look at him as a man? Was there a way to overcome that?
He found himself sighing again. Should he try to go to Neji again? "Is Neji…is he doing well?"
"You may go see him if you wish," Haru told him.
Gaara's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Really?"
"The young master may do whatever he pleases. If someone offends you or if you are tired of them, you can kill them, and no one would stop you. There is nowhere you cannot go and nothing you cannot do. The master has proclaimed as much."
Neji said that? It was touching, as well as a bit overwhelming, but why did Neji keep avoiding him then? All he wanted was to see him.
"Then… I wish to see Neji."
He thought they would try to dissuade him. They did no such thing. They prepared him to go out and accompanied him to where Neji was.
He was in the chanoma, reading by candlelight. He looked much healthier than the last time Gaara had seen him. He must have finally eaten. One worry was quelled, while another came to replace it, wondering if he would give Gaara his time or send him away.
Neji looked up, seeing Gaara lingering at the door. Placing his novel in his lap, he told the twins to put more coal in the heater to warm the room. "Please sit," he told Gaara.
He seemed friendly enough, though Gaara felt some distance as well. Neither spoke as the twins prepared the room for Gaara, preparing him a cushion to sit on, pouring him tea, and providing him a blanket to wrap around his shoulders. They all seem to worry endlessly about his health. It was a bit burdensome. He was not that fragile, and his wound was almost healed. Their fussing was only making him hot.
When the twins finished. They quickly left, leaving Neji and Gaara alone for a private conversation. The first thing Gaara did was shrug off the blanket, putting it behind him.
"Are you healing well?" Neji asked. He seemed tentative to speak, quite unlike him.
Gaara had less patience for small talk though. He had been dying to see Neji for so long, he needed to know now. "Do you dislike me?" he asked.
"What?" Neji asked with surprise.
"Do you dislike me? You have not come to see me so…" he trailed off.
Neji huffed a little, a small smile pulling at his lips howbeit self-depreciative. "I assumed you would not wish to see me. I have caused you much pain these past weeks."
"It is more pain not being able to see Neji," Gaara said.
Neji's face was conflicted as guilt seeped into his features as well. "Why? I have shown you nothing but disgraceful actions. I was childish and naïve, and I—" he stuttered as if the shame was too much to continue. "I raised my sword against you. You almost died because of me."
"You are not the first to try to kill me," Gaara said, shrugging it off. After fighting for so long, he knew his Neji had missed his vital points on purpose. It was never Neji's intention to kill him, and given the situation, he understood why it was done.
Neji bristled, not liking Gaara's dismissal of it. "Who tried to kill you? I will have their head."
Neji getting angry for his sake made him laugh. "My father has many wives and many children. Many fight to become king. I do not fight, but they still see me as an enemy. Only Kankuro has ever shown me kindness at home. Would you kill so many?"
"If that is what you desire." His eyes portrayed the dead seriousness in his words. If Gaara asked, he would do it.
Gaara's smile dropped, suddenly feeling uncomfortable, trying to stop the hope before it could grow too large. "You know I like Neji. Why does Neji say these things? I will misunderstand."
Neji raised his hand as if he was about to reach out to comfort him and stopped halfway. "You still like me?" he whispered.
Gaara's mouth closed tight, afraid he made another mistake. Images of the last rejection were still quite fresh in his head. He had said too much again, didn't he? He should have kept his mouth shut.
"Gaara," Neji said gently, trying to coax him to speak.
"I know, you do not like it. Please do not hate me."
Neji reached out, placing his hand on top of his. "I do not hate it. Because of my past, because of that man, I became blinded with fear."
"That man was your lover. Is that why you do not like me?" He was trying not to get his hopes up, but Neji was drawing him in with his actions, initiating touch on his own, talking to him gently and sweetly.
"A long time ago, he was," Neji admitted. "I admired him. But you have seen with your own eyes how poor his personality was. He was a man with no honor. He poisoned my mind to control me. He did not deserve my attentions," he took Gaara's hand, bringing it to his mouth, kissing the inside of his hand. "Just as I do not deserve yours."
Neji's breath tickled, but Gaara's cheeks flushed at Neji's actions. Was it okay to believe that Neji was willing to give him a chance? That Neji was trying to accept him? He was embarrassed; however, a heat was rising inside him, starting at the pit of his stomach. A spark quickly gaining ground. His mouth went dry, and he was focused on where Neji's lips hovered over his skin.
Neji was the same, his eyes intensifying as the tension built inside.
Gaara could not hold it back anymore. He threw himself at Neji, Neji catching him, their lips mashing together with hunger. Their teeth clashed in their haste. Neji wrapped his arms around his waist, pulling him closer. Gaara straddled his waist, hiking and parting his yukata in the process.
Gaara kissed clumsily. It was messy. Gaara kept pressing closer as if desperate for Neji's touch, desperate to breathe his air. His hardness pressed against Neji's stomach.
Neji had to push Gaara away, just enough so that they could breathe, wiping the saliva from the corner of his lips with his thumb. "You need practice," he said softly, teasingly. "Do you not need air?"
Gaara's face, which was already flushed, turned a deeper red as he said, "Sorry, I've never did this."
"Never?" Neji asked. "At your age?"
He shook his head. "Is that bad?"
No, not at all. Neji's instincts were pleased with that fact, that his mate had not been with another. Even the thought of him with another, he could not bear. "Is this what you really desire?" he asked. "If we go further, I will not be able to stop." Gaara brushed his lips against his, and it was hard to resist. He wanted to push him down and have his way with him. So much so that it was almost excruciating. The words Uchiha told him before came to mind, how something clicked and suddenly it was hard to stay away.
He was fearful of that, fearful of trying to possess Gaara as Shukaku had tried with him. Every fiber of his being told him that if he went past a certain point if he decided to bed the man in his arms, he would never be able to let him go, would not be able to live without him. Gaara would be his, and he would be enslaved to Gaara. Gaara's happiness would be all that mattered to him.
"Do not stop," Gaara replied breathily. His body was shaking as if he shared Neji's struggle to hold himself back. "If Neji wants my body, then have it. I have nothing Neji could want. I am all I have. If it will buy me Neji, please take it."
Neji growled, trailing his lips down Gaara's neck. His restraint snapping as he ground his hardness against Gaara. Gaara was more than he could ever afford, yet Gaara spoke as if it was not enough, that he did not have much worth. He was angry Gaara would think that way but aroused that he was willing to be his. He needed to give his mate everything. The entire world. And beg for his forgiveness for ever harming him and making him cry.
Gaara, caught a moan in his throat, cutting it off. Gaara was indeed inexperienced, getting overstimulated with a little bit of rubbing and grinding, ejaculating.
The smell of his organism wrapped around Neji's senses, drawing out his primal urges. The smell of a sweet, spicy incense with the earthy undertone. He knew this smell. The only time when he had ever found pleasure during sex. It seemed he found his little spy from that time.
If he was in his right mind, he would have felt shame at the knowledge Gaara had seen him, but he no longer had control of his actions, licking Gaara's neck, tasting his skin, memorizing it. He needed to pleasure his mate. Make his Gaara come over and over again until he could no longer think. Have him hang onto Neji for dear life and beg him to stop yet have his body urge him on.
"S-sorry," Gaara tried to apologize for his performance. He was unable to. Neji picked him up and laid him down on the floor, kissing his neck as he parted Gaara's yukata more. Gaara's body opened up to him, opening his legs so Neji could settle between them, his arms around Neji, one around his neck and the other tangled in his hair.
His scent really was like a drug. Neji could hardly think straight. He needed to be one with Gaara. His hand traveled outside his thigh until he could grab a handful of nicely toned ass in his hand. Gaara arched his body into Neji's as if there was still too much distance between them.
Vaguely aware that Gaara had not worn underwear underneath his clothes, Neji felt Gaara's erection pressing against his stomach, pleading for Neji's attention. How could he refuse? Grabbing hold of the heavily weeping member, already wet and sticky from Gaara's little accident. The hot and throbbing member in his hand, threatened to unearth Neji's bad memories, almost recalling the last time he had laid with men. As if he knew, Gaara thrusted, bringing Neji's attention back to him.
Neji pumped his member, his callused hand causing a delicious friction. Unable to control himself, Gaara kept trying to thrust, wanting Neji to go faster. Only soft sounds escaped Gaara's lips, even as his nails dug into Neji's skin, leaving deep scratches. If he kept going, Gaara was going to come again. Since this was Gaara's first experience, Neji knew it would not take much to push Gaara over. What bothered him was how quiet Gaara was.
He wanted to hear his voice, wanted to hear him call his name desperately. He bit down lightly on his collar bone, just piercing the skin and drawing a little blood.
Gaara arched, letting out a simultaneous gasp and cry. Pleasure flooded him from the small wound, Gaara coming a little. That was what he wanted to hear.
Neji pumped faster, biting once again, a little deeper this time, going over the wound with his tongue, tasting the wonderful ambrosia that was his Gaara.
Gaara came again, crying out loudly this time, unable to restrain his voice no matter how much he tried, pulling Neji's hair.
Neji would not let him rest. He did not stop leaving small bites down his body, each bite bringing Gaara more and more pleasure, overstimulating his senses. Even after he had softened for his refractory period, he felt like his body was still trying to orgasm again and again. "Neji!" he would scream. "Please. I can't," he cried.
He said that, but never once tried to push Neji away, only closer. If Neji even tried to move away to move or change positions, Gaara would not let him go. "More," he would ask him. He was completely lost to the pleasure and lust.
He liked hearing him like this. Not restrained or embarrassed. No doubt Haru, Natsu, and the guards could hear them through the thin walls. He would send them away in the future., so Gaara could be as loud as he wanted. Only he was allowed to hear Gaara like this. This was only for his ears.
He kissed, nipped, and bit all the way down Gaara's body until he was covered in bruises and bite marks. When he leaned back, Gaara was a mess. His yukata was barely held together, only the obi keeping it together as the top and bottom were as open as they could be. His skin was flushed, his hair a tangled mess, his stomach covered in his own mess, his chest heaving up and down, his hard nipples drawing Neji's attention asking to be sucked on.
Neji wanted to devour him. Until he was completely debauched, covered in Neji's come. "Do you know how men have sex, Gaara-san," he whispered into his mate's ear.
Gaara's eyes, which had been glazed over with pleasure, sobered a little. His lips were parted, and he was breathing heavily, but there was nervousness in his eyes and a little fear. Instead of answering, he took Neji's hand, bringing it between his legs and pushed Neji's fingers inside, strangling a moan.
Gaara knew. It made things a little easier. Neji had done anal with women before and was careful not to hurt them, but with men, he could not help but associate it with pain. It helped Gaara knew what he was going to do, helped that Gaara was nervous and scared, but still wanted to do this. He was placing trust that Neji would do right by him.
Neji pushed his fingers further in, working Gaara's body which had tensed at the intrusion back open. It was uncomfortable for Gaara, feeling weird and awkward and somewhat painful, causing his erection to wilt some. Despite the bit of pain, he wanted Neji to take him, put himself inside him. Gaara felt he would go mad if he did not. He could not take Neji's teasing anymore.
Neji felt he was about to burst. His erection was throbbing painfully, dying to dive into Gaara's warm flesh. His instincts were directing him to do so. Make him yours. Be one with him. Never separate from him. His sanity threatened to break if he postponed it any longer, yet he hesitated to take that final step.
He watched his fingers thrust in and out of Gaara's hole, ensuring that there was no blood. This was okay, right. This wouldn't hurt him, right?
"Neji," Gaara called, grabbing his hand, stopping him, and removing his fingers. He lifted his legs, spreading his ass for him. "Do it. I need it."
The beautifully provocative body before him, begging for him to continue, Neji stopped thinking, capturing his lips, and entered him hard.
Gaara swallowed the pain, letting Neji rut. Neji rutted like an animal in heat. His hips moved erratically as if he was trying to bury himself inside Gaara as deeply as physically as possible. Rational thought had left him. He just needed to mate.
The pain did keep Gaara from climaxing too early. Occasionally, Neji would hit something inside him that would make his vision white with pleasure. Little by little, Neji would hit that spot more and more until it was consistent, pulling Gaara into his mindless pleasure. More, more, more, they both thought. It wasn't enough. It was never enough.
Gaara held Neji close, wrapping his legs around his waist, trying to help Neji go harder, go deeper, any discomfort forgotten.
Neji came first, filling Gaara's hole. His nails dug into the tatami mats, leaving grooves behind. He pulled out and pulled his body away from Gaara, wanting to check on him in the brief moment of clarity. He did not hurt him, right? "Are you okay?"
Rather than a verbal answer, Gaara flipped over, getting onto his hands and knees, presenting his ass in the air. Neji's breath hitched, seeing his seed trail down those strong muscular legs. His erection had hardly flagged before, Gaara's actions brought him back to full hardness. Looking back with a seductive gaze, he said, "Again."
He descended onto Gaara again, taking him from behind. Leaving new marks on his back. He did not stop again. Even when Gaara came onto the mats over and over, he kept going. He had not marked his mate enough with his scent.
When Gaara could not keep himself up anymore, too exhausted to hold his weight, Neji held him so he could continue. He never told Neji to stop, cried out until he lost his voice. Even when he could no longer get hard, his body continued to try. He passed out from pleasure twice, and when Neji stopped it was morning. They had made love the entire night.
Neji laid beside him, holding his fatigued mate in his arms. Gaara tried to adjust, grunting in discomfort.
"Is your body alright?" Neji whispered into his ear, running his hand over his body comfortingly.
"Wound hurts a little," Gaara mumbled on the brink of sleep. "Hips hurt too."
"I'm sorry." Neji kissed his forehead, slipping into more casual speech. "I told you I would not stop."
"I know," he slurred. "I did not want you to."
His thumb ran over his lover's cheek. "I want you to know, I never laid with that man." Shukaku had tried to convince him to sleep with him when he was in his grasp, but Neji had stopped him every time if Shukaku tried to go too far. Japanese men did not typically use the word love, and words of affection were given sparingly. As long as he was in love with Shukaku, he never once gave him words of affection and endearment. In Gaara's ear, he said softly, "You are the light who illuminates my path, and the sun in my world that is mostly night."
Gaara snuggled into his chest, his hair tickling Neji's nose. "Ya amar," he replied just before falling asleep.
chanoma- living room basically. It's a place to kind of chill outbr /
Ya amar - means "My moon"
To explain why Neji stabbed him in case it was not clear, Shukaku was about to kill Gaara as Neji had obviously reacted to him. Neji was too weak physically to fight Shukaku head-on, as he was in a hungry state and was not on a day schedule like Shukaku had been for decades. Stabbing Gaara bought them time, and allowed Neji to get close and get a sucker punch in.