Chapter 3

It did not take long for Daffy to become inebriated. Just as business was beginning to pick up, it became apparent that the duck was not going to be able to take much more.

"Alright Daffy I tink dats enough" Bugs forcefully suggested, lowering the duck's hand just as he was about to ask for another drink.

"Oh c'mon" Daffy complained, his speech growing difficult to understand, "I jus' neeeeed one moooooore."

"No, you don't, besides I can't afford it even if I wanted to" Bugs slid off the bar stool helping Daffy to his feet. Being in such a weak state, the bunny was met with little resistance as the duck barely managed to land on his feet. Daffy swayed back and forth for a moment before colliding into Bugs, leaning on him for support.

"Why is the room moving around?" Daffy sputtered.

"I can trust you to take care of him, right?" the bartender asked, concerned.

"Don't worry, he's safe wit' me" Bugs assured, doing his best to guide Daffy to the exit. The journey to the door proved more difficult than expected, once outside however, Bugs realized they still had to navigate the stairs up to the street level. This was even more challenging, with Bugs having to nearly carry Daffy up, lest he slide back down the stairs.

"Alright, which way is your place? I gotta get ya home" Bugs patted Daffy's face, trying to get him to come to his senses.

"My place? Ooooooh it's right arooooouuuund this area" Daffy waved his arm around, indicating no particular direction. Bugs sighed, rubbing his temples. Of course, he had to be the one to wind up with a drunken duck on his shoulder. Why was it he was never in this situation with some cute guy? He had felt bad for Daffy and decided to pay for his drinks, but if he had known that it would go this far then he never would have offered in the first place. If Daffy could not at least indicate a street address then Bugs knew he would have no choice but to bring the duck to his apartment, and that was not something he particularly wanted to do.

Bugs slapped the duck even harder, desperate to get any indication of where to go,

"C'mon doc, work wit me here! Where do you live?"

"I'm living right here, right now" Daffy drooped. Bugs groaned.

"Alright, fine, have it your way." With that he began dragging the duck in the direction of his apartment.

/

"Th-th-this better not be g-going where I think it's going" Porky commented nervously, looking up to Daffy. The duck shrugged.

"Hell if I know, I was plastered during this part; I couldn't remember what happened the next morning, let alone 70 years later" Daffy answered. At this the two of them looked over to Bugs.

"If ya expect'n a show, then prepare to be disappointed" Bugs said.

/

It was not long before the two reached Bugs apartment building; the bunny was quite thankful they had not run into any fans on the way over. All things considered, it was a rather unsuspecting place, not standing out from the rest of the other apartment buildings which lay about the area. They entered, trudged up a few stairs, and soon found themselves inside Bugs' home. It was a small place, but still quite comfortable. Upon entering there was a kitchen area to the right, with the rest of the room being filled up by a couch, coffee table, some chairs and a radio. On the far wall there was a rather large window, letting quite a bit of the fading light from outside into the room, and to the right there was a door which Daffy could only assume led to the bedroom and bathroom. Two of the walls were made of brick, and the floor was a fine polished wood. All things considered it was a rather cool bachelor pad, which was not something that was easy to find on their salary. Bugs dragged Daffy in, closing the door with his foot, and practically threw him onto the couch.

In his current state, Daffy was only seldom grasping what was going on. He was aware that Bugs had brought him to his apartment, but the impact of actually being there was negated by the fluids running through his body. He looked around, as if in a dream, taking in these new surroundings for the very first time.

"Gosh gollllllly, it suuure was nice of yoooouuu to bring me here" Daffy said, at the very least thankful in his own sort of way. Bugs collapsed onto one of the chairs, exhausted from essentially having to support the duck for almost the entire walk. What was worse was that he was now in his apartment, Bugs was stuck with him until he sobered up.

"Just don't go gett'n any funny ideas, ok? The only reason I brought ya here was cause I had no other option" Bugs folded his arms.

"Are you angry with me?" Daffy frowned, his head drooping off of the couch as he looked at the bunny with large watery eyes.

"I'm not mad… ok maybe I am a little mad" Bugs stood up, heading over to the kitchen area. He began rifling through cabinets, hoping that he could find something to sober Daffy up.

"You know, earlier today I found you kind of annoying, but the way your taking charge like this is kind of sexy" the duck thought aloud, beginning to drift between conscious and unconscious. Bugs immediately paused, a tad flustered at the comment.

/

Porky looked up, trying to read the expressions on his two companions faces in an attempt to gage how they felt watching all of this play out. He had to admit that being the intruder here, he felt incredibly uncomfortable. Bugs had assured them that nothing was going to happen, but still there was a part of Porky which wondered if that was a lie he was telling them to make things less awkward. In spite of all this, in a bizarre sort of way he was finding himself invested in what was happening. He felt bad for admitting it to himself, but at this point he wanted to see how far this little evening in the 1940s would go.

Daffy meanwhile, was doing everything he could to hide the amount of cringe he was experiencing. It was not often one got the chance to see oneself drunk, let alone this drunk, and Daffy was not enjoying the experience of seeing what a total idiot he was making of himself. The fact that he had called Bugs "sexy" was the worst part of it. He checked his watch, thankful that they did not have too much time left. Never the less, the minutes could not count down fast enough as far as he was concerned. The three of them continued to sit there, in silence, not wanting to make it more awkward for the other two.

/

"Listen here mistah, if you're gonna be a horny drunk, then at the very least could you try and be a self-aware horny drunk?" Bugs said, taking out some coffee. He was unsure as to whether or not it actually had any effect in negating drunkenness, but he was willing to try anything to get this over with. Daffy slouched upward, trying to appear more presentable.

"Look, being self-aware is not in my wheelhouse right now." His speech was still slurred, but it was clear that he was making more of an effort. Bugs set up the coffee, then sat back down once again.

"I nevah said you had to be, I just told you to try" he folded his arms once more. There was a moment of silence as they both sat there.

"Hey listen… thanks for helping me out like this. It was a really nice thing to do" Daffy eventually said, breaking their silence.

"You're welcome."

"I know I… I kinda acted like an ass in the bar. I said earlier that we had a long way to go before I would even consider you a friend, but after this… if you wanna be friends then… I guess it wouldn't be totally one sided."

"Wit da way you're act'n now, you'd be lucky if I let ya be my friend" Bugs scoffed. He was still angry, but a bit of his more jovial nature was slipping through. For a moment they sat in silence once more. It was once again Daffy who decided to say something.

"Hey, you're not gonna tell anyone about this, are you?"

"Course not! Even if I was that awful then there's no way I can go tell'n dis story without out'n myself" Bugs answered.

"Does anybody at work know about you being…interested in guys?" Daffy asked.

"No, and no way am I risk'n it either. What about you?"

"I hope not! I've always been careful to keep it under wraps."

"Not even Porky knows? You two seem pretty close."

"That's why I especially can't let Porky know. He's so, well you've met him… he's simple… old fashioned. Just today I had to lie to him, and say that I was going to a doctor's appointment." Daffy sighed.

"Ha! Some doctor's appointment" Bugs joked.

"Yeah… but I mean, you know how it is. If there wasn't a need to keep it from Porky, I would just tell him, but the way things are I hope he never finds out."

/

Upon hearing this from his past self, Daffy looked down to Porky, trying to gage the pig's reaction to this. This whole situation was so difficult. Daffy knew he had no reason to feel ashamed, this was his private life and he had the right to dole it out as he pleased. In spite of this, he still wondered how Porky would react knowing he and Bugs had shared a secret like this.

Porky on the other hand, was trying to gage how Daffy felt. Now that the conversation had switched to him, things had become especially awkward. Porky hated how drawn in he was by the whole thing, especially now that the topic had shifted to something about himself which he was not meant to hear. He was never one to pry into other people's personal affairs, and yet now that these decades old secrets were presenting themselves to him, he could not help but to feel himself get drawn into their grasp.

/

Bugs leaned back, assuming a more casual position.

"Alright, well forget about a potato like Porky, tell me about dis guy you broke up wit" the bunny said, a bit more conversational.

"Oh, don't go dredging up this again" Daffy groaned.

"C'mon, you can't just get over someone by drink'n your problems away and then not even acknowledg'n it."

"Well first of all, his name was John. Second of all, it wasn't a breakup, because in order to have a breakup, one must date. John and I were strictly in it for the sex."

"Please, not so explicit. You're putt'n an image in my head I didn't want dare in da first place" Bugs complained.

"Hey, you were the one who asked." Daffy shifted his body to get a better look at his host, when suddenly, in his drunken state he shifted a bit further than expected. The duck very quickly found himself lying face down on the floor. At the very least, it was not that far of a fall. Daffy turned his head to the side, so that he could adequately articulate his words, at least to the best degree a drunk duck could.

"Hey, a little help here?"

"Seriously?" Bugs stood up to get a better look, raising an eyebrow.

"You try getting up when you're this drunk!" Daffy replied. Bugs sighed.

"Alright, fine. You better just be grateful that I'm not one of those guys who goes taking advantage of someone the first moment he gets." The bunny walked around the coffee table to where the duck was lying. Bugs knelt down, doing his best to get Daffy back on his feet.

"C'mon, put your back into it" Daffy commentated.

"It would be a lot easier if you put in a bit more effort" Bugs scoffed.

Eventually, Bugs just barely managed to get Daffy back upright, although it was clear that the duck would not be able to maintain the position for long. Bugs kept a steady grasp on the duck's shoulders but even that was not enough, as he could feel Daffy beginning to sway. His eyelids were getting droopy, barely open.

"Thaaaanks a lot pal" Daffy smiled. He slowly swayed in, and before Bugs knew it, a drunken kiss was planted on his lips. Before he could register what was even happening, or even react, the duck swayed back, and collapsed on the couch.

/

Daffy shielded his eyes from the others, trying to avoid eye contact. He did not even want to know what was going through Bugs mind while watching this play out. This was so embarrassing; he was glad to have forgotten it. Sadly, there was no way he or his two companions would be forgetting this any time soon.

/

Bugs stood there for a moment, not quite sure how to process what he had just experienced. After a moment of mental delay, he instinctively wiped the spit off his lips, trying to act as disgusted as possible. On the one hand, he was kind of offended. After all, if anyone was going to go around kissing people, then it would be him! On the other hand, he felt oddly flustered. If he was being honest then… it wasn't the worst kiss he had ever had. No! What was he thinking? There was no way he needed to go thinking about a relationship with Daffy Duck of all people! He was a famous star, he had better options.

Bugs turned around to see whether or not the coffee was done. He walked into the kitchen, then proceeded to pour a mug. He then walked back to the living room, placing the mug on the coffee table.

"Here Daffy, try drink'n dis."

There was no reply.

"Daffy?" Bugs knelt down beside the couch, shaking the duck. He was out cold. Bugs checked his pulse; he was still alive at the very least. He tried shaking the duck once more, yet he still would not wake up. Suddenly, a loud snore was let loose. Bugs sighed, there was no way he was going to get Daffy out of his apartment at this rate.

/

Suddenly, an alarm went off on Daffy's watch. The two hours were up!

"Oh, thank god! We can finally get out of here!" the duck said joyously, showing the zeroes to Bugs and Porky.

"B-b-bu-bu-but wait a minute!" Porky stammered, though there was no time for him to object. Before they knew it, the great blinding light enveloped them once more and after a moment they soon found themselves standing on solid concrete. All three of them rubbed their eyes, trying to recover from the experience. When Porky began to regain some of his vision, he looked around, disappointed by their surroundings. They were standing back in that same old abandoned parking lot they had met Daffy at earlier that day. They were back in their own time.

"Well, I'm glad dat's over wit" Bugs stretched, "Dat bubble was awful cramped."

"I'm just glad we no longer have to sit through me making a fool of myself. Speaking of which" Daffy looked down to Porky, "You better keep your snout shut about everything you saw, got it?" Waving his finger disparagingly as he did so.

"B-b-bu-bu-but what happened?" Porky asked.

"Wadda ya mean what happened?" Bugs folded his arms.

"W-well y-you can't ju-just leave me hanging l-like that" Porky pleaded, "Did you have a-a r-re-rel-relationship?"

Both Bugs and Daffy glanced towards each other, then back down at the pig.

"For shame! Don't you have an ounce of dignity left in that squishy little body of yours?" Daffy scoffed, "Honestly, being so blunt about such private matters, I expected better of you!"

"If ya really wanna know, then all dat happened was I threw a blanket over Daffy, and then went ta sleep in my own separate bed. I then woke up da next mornin' ta find he was not da best at hold'n his liquor" Bugs explained, "Dare was no relationship, and no sex; after all I wouldn't go taking advantage a someone in dat state."

"I-I see" Pokry said, a bit disappointed, "W-we-well if that's t-the case, then I h-ha-have a meeting to get to." The pig then walked away. Bugs waited for Porky to be out of earshot, then casually put his arm around Daffy. The duck looked over to Bugs, confused.

"What's all this about?" Daffy asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, I donno" Bugs said coyly, "I guess that whole trip just sort'a put me in a romantic mood."

"With Porky sitting right there?"

"Ok, ignoring Porky, it put me in a romantic mood."

"But I thought we agreed back in 51 that it would be best if we kept our working relationship platonic?" In spite of what he what saying, Daffy was now reciprocating, placing his arm around Bugs.

"Well, it ain't 51 anymore, so I say we give things another shot" the bunny smiled. Daffy shook his head, not believing what he was hearing.

"If I had known getting black out drunk was such a turn on for you then I would have done it sooner" the duck joked as they walked off together, holding hands.

"That's not exactly the lesson I was hop'n you'd take away from this whole escapade" Bugs said as he leaned in, resting his head against Daffy's cheek.