Chapter 9: Snuggles and Threats

She was happy, content, over the clouds, with Addison safely sleeping in her arms. Last time this had happened she had been angry she could not stay with her until she woke up. This time she was here and she was not going to move until Addison did.

They had been in the on-call room for a while now. Thankfully no one had tried to barge in to interrupt their nap. At some point Addison had adjusted herself so that her head rested on Meredith's chest, her hands securely fastened around her waist. A tiny smile had appeared on her face where tears had been an hour before which made Meredith even happier.

A content sigh escaped the sleeping redhead's lips as Meredith brushed away some loose strands of hair away from her face. This was what she wanted. What she needed. It pained her to think that this might have just been a moment of weakness. Maybe Addison would have been ok with anyone but then…

"I don't know. I'm... I want to help... tell me what you need and I'll do it. Tell me who you need and I'll get them here. Just tell me what to do." Meredith had begged.

"You!" Addison had quickly replied.

She had said she wanted her. Over Derek, which was actually no surprise, but also over Mark. Addison had wanted her to stay. Maybe that meant something. Maybe it was fine to hope. Would it be ok to let herself hope, though? Would she get hurt again? Then again she was already on her way. She was already hoping, already believing that Addison might feel something, anything for her. "I don't hate you." Addison had said and if her blurry mind was correct she had really meant it. If she did not hate her then would she be ok to feel something else?

Meredith frowned, too many questions, too many thoughts when she should be enjoying her slumbering company. Hard as it was she shut her mind and focused on Addison's features. Her red hair, her soft and porcelain skin, her perfectly sculpted face adorned by those luscious pink lips. She was a work of art and just for this moment she was Meredith's work of art.

The moment was starting to end and Meredith was dreading it as her work of art began to slightly shift. Addison tightened her hold against her reflectively and buried her face on her neck. Meredith's breath hitched as she felt warm air brushing off against her. Yet she lay as still as she could manage trying to delay the inevitable. Slowly Addison's eyes fluttered open and Meredith held her breath as she lifted her head to look at her. The small smile she had had during her sleep widening a bit as their eyes met, until realization hit.

Addison had rested so well, even after the run in with Mrs. Burns, she felt relaxed and airy. She reluctantly lifted her head from the warm pillow with a sleepy smile, only it was no pillow she had been laying on. How had she forgotten that she was with Meredith? She became flustered rather quickly as blue eyes landed on her with a sweet smile. She looked down and noticed her arms wrapped around the blonde. She completely froze at the sight, avoiding eye contact, as panic invaded her.

"Addison." Meredith's voice rang tentatively.

"I uh, umm." Addison stammered, still avoiding her.

"Ar-are you ok?" Meredith asked, shifting nervously.

"P-perfect." Addison managed to get out. "I uh should… uh…"

"You don't have to go if you don't want to." Meredith responded, her voice sounding even more unsure than before and tensing up.

Addison looked at her then. She could see the insecurities and concern swimming in her blue eyes, so she did the only thing there was to do, soothe her. She laid her head on Meredith's chest once more with a sigh as she drew aimless circles on her arm. Slowly she felt as Meredith's tension began to ease, her muscles relaxing and her breathing evening out.

They were silent for a while, Addison's head flooding with thoughts, as she stared into the darkness of the room. Everything felt so backwards to her and yet so right. There she lay in a tangle of limbs, snuggled up to Meredith Grey. Who would have thought this could ever happen? She certainly did not. She had wished for it but she had never thought there would come the day when she would lay in her arms. She lightly chuckled, drawing Meredith's attention.

"What's funny?" Meredith asked.

Absent-mindedly the blonde brushed Addison's hair out of her face when she shifted to look at her. A small blush heated up Addison's cheeks but she ignored it, offering her a gentle smile.

"Nothing." Addison said as she looked up to her. "Thank you."

"What for?" Meredith asked, tilting her head.

"For this." Addison sweetly smiled.

"Oh. It uh… it was nothing." Meredith smiled a bit nervously.

"So are you enjoying yourself?" Addison asked, trying to hide the smirk working its way onto her face.

"Wh-what?" Meredith looked at her in shock.

"You keep playing with my hair." Addison pointed out. It seemed Meredith had not even noticed that the whole time she had been curling and playing around with the redhead's hair.

"I'm so sorry. I didn't even notice." Meredith said, quickly letting go.

"No, it's fine." Addison said quickly. "Keep going."

Meredith looked at her with a bit of uncertainty before she nodded encouragingly. So the blonde began to play it again, this time running her fingers through it causing Addison to hum contently as she laid her head back on Meredith yet again.

They stayed quiet for a while after and Addison found herself playing with Meredith's hand. Running her fingers softly against her palm causing her to giggle. The sound warming Addison and she smiled softly.

"You have great surgeon hands." Addison idly mentioned.

"Is that your assessment?" Meredith giggled once more.

"Yeah. Nice long and skinny fingers. Very supple and soft." Addison said as she turned Meredith's hand.

"Addison." Meredith semi-scolded.

"What?" Addison looked at her oblivious to what her words could be taken as.

"You just said. Well you were talking about my fingers and umm and…" Meredith tried explaining but whatever it was was going over Addison's head.

"What?" She asked again.

"Oh, umm nothing." Meredith shook her head as she completely flushed.

"You sure?" Addison asked.

"Yep. Completely." Meredith nodded quickly.

"Ok." Addison said shifting again and laying on her chest.

"You also have very nice surgeon fingers." Meredith chuckled a bit.

"What's so funny about that?" Addison asked.

"Nothing. I was just saying." Meredith replied and continued gently massaging her scalp.

"That feels nice." Addison softly hummed again.

"Good." Meredith smiled.

"Meredith?" She said after a while.

"Hmm?" Meredith replied, still playing with her hair.

"Why did you… Earlier at the cafeteria you got upset. You looked angry even. Why?" Addison faced her once more as Meredith's hand stilled.

"It was nothing." She answered as she continued to play with her hair once again.

"Are you sure? Did I do something? Was it Mark? I thought everything was ok and then you just left." Addison pushed.

"Everything was ok." Meredith assured with a small smile.

"Promise?" Addison tried again.

"I'm ok. Everything's fine." Meredith replied though her eyes clouded over just a tiny bit.

"Somehow, I don't believe you." Addison smiled up at her before she returned to her spot on Meredith's chest.

"Meredith." Addison called again.

"What is it, Addie?" Meredith responded and at the sound of her nickname Addison looked up.

"Call me like that from now on, ok?" Addison smiled widely as Meredith nodded with an equal smile. "Are you a little hungry? Like snack hungry? We have about an hour left on our shift."

"Sure. The vending machine is pretty close. We can grab some chips or something." Meredith suggested.

"Yeah, let's go." Addison smiled.

They got up although a bit reluctantly since they were so comfortable with each other. Addison went for the door when Meredith stopped her grabbing onto her white coat, much like she had that morning.

"Meredith, something wrong?" Addison turned meeting sad and uncertain blue eyes.

"Is this… will this… I uh… I really umm." Meredith seemed to be having issues stringing sentences.

"I enjoyed this and I may be up to doing it again." Addison said for her.

"You would?" Meredith's face brightened.

"Yes." Addison took her hand and squeezed it.

"So it wasn't because I was the only one here? Or?" Meredith pressed her lips together nervously.

"No Meredith. It wasn't because you were the only one here. I wanted you." Addison admitted as a raising blush crawled its way up her neck, much like Meredith's. " Wh-why don't we go?"

"Right." Meredith replied quickly.

Both women slipped out of the on-call room and headed to the vending machines. As Meredith had said they ended up with bags of chips and sodas. Then they went back to the lobby and sat together idly chatting and laughing until their pagers went off.

"Mr. and Mrs. Burns, may we come in?" Addison said tentatively as she knocked on the door. They had sent for her, which surprised her a bit but at the same time it did not. Mrs. Burns would need her to do the assisted delivery.

"Come in." Clint called.

"When can you do it?" Suzy asked immediately as they walked in.

"It's up to you. If you want, I could induce you today or tomorrow morning." Addison responded.

"Today?" Clint looked at her with despair in his eyes.

"The time is up to you. I'm just letting you know that I'm available to do it whenever you are." Addison explained as Meredith rocked from one foot to the other.

"Tomorrow." Suzy said. "Please leave now." Addison and Meredith moved quickly, closing the door behind them as they left.

"Would you be up for this tomorrow?" Addison asked Meredith as they approached the nurses' station. "I understand if you rather not these things are tough. But you do need to learn." She added when Meredith stayed quiet.

"I will be here. Ready when you are." Meredith nodded with a small smile of reassurance.

"Ok. Well I think I've kept you long enough. Go get some rest. I'll see you tomorrow." Addison said, matching her smile.

"Ok. I'll see you tomorrow. You get some rest as well." Meredith grinned.

"Meredith, thank you. For staying with me even if…" Addison began but stopped.

"Even if what?" Meredith questioned.

"Nothing." Addison shook her head with a smile. "Go on. Have a nice night."

"Goodnight, Addie." Meredith smiled using her nickname which completely warmed her.

Addison stared after her for a while with a silly smile on her face before remembering she too should get ready to go. First she went to her office to grab her things and then she was off to the elevator. She went in and the door was closing when suddenly Derek's hand shot through stopping it and he got on.

"Tell me I'm wrong Addison." He said her back to her as he pressed a floor button.

"I don't have time for games Derek. What is this about?" Addison asked, letting out an annoyed sigh.

"Tell me that what your eyes are saying is a lie. Because if it's not, you've fallen far." Derek turned to her, pulling the emergency button.

"Get to the point. I have things to do." Addison retorted standing her ground as he took a step toward her.

"Are you falling for Meredith?" He asked, stopping a few inches from her.

"I don't know what you're talking about. Move, I have to go." She made to step around him but he grabbed her and slammed her against the back wall of the elevator.

"Don't play dumb with me Addison. I know you." He growled.

Addison could feel his fingers digging into her arms but did not dare make a sound. What the hell was wrong with Derek? He had never acted that way toward anyone much less her. She looked into his eyes and could see the smoldering anger swirling about. It terrified her but she was strong she would not show it.

"So what if I am." She hissed and he dug his fingers in even more. Pain now irradiated up and down her arms and still she did not waver.

"I'll only say this once, Addison. Stay away from my Meredith. She is mine." He barked.

"She's not property Derek. You can't state your claim to her like that." Addison challenged.

"I'm warning you Addison. I'll do anything for Meredith. Do you understand?" He let go of her and punched the wall next to her head making her flinch. "I don't care what it is. I don't care who it hurts. Even if it is her." Addison just stood there as he pushed back the emergency button and the elevator began to move once more. He walked out on her floor but she just stood there frozen.

Was he being serious? Or was this just a tactic to scare her off? If it was, it was working. She was terrified not for herself but for her, for Meredith.

After a few minutes and some deep breaths she made her way to her car, continually looking over her shoulder as she went. Out of the corner of her eye she spotted Meredith walking to her car along with some of the other interns so she moved quickly and got into her car. She left the parking lot as quickly as possible, ignoring Meredith's wave and looking straight ahead. She had no idea how she made it to her hotel but she did and in one piece. Walking through the lobby she heard Mark's laugh echoing about as he joked with Richard, which was still strange to her but right now she did not care.

She made it to her room before the tears began to run down her cheeks. Shaking her head, trying to shake away the tears, she got her pajamas. As she jumped in the shower where salty tears mixed with the water that was spraying on her.

How was she supposed to do this? She had just told Meredith that she wanted her. How was she supposed to keep her safe? Was she strong enough to break her? How was she to pretend that she did not want her? Hiding it was fine. But they had gotten so close in just the last few hours. Was she strong enough to pretend that none of that mattered? She had just begun but now she had to stop.

Red puffy eyes stared back at her as she looked in the mirror. There were also bright pink finger marks on both of her arms, which she knew would bruise for a long while. More tears streamed down her cheeks as she looked into her reflection's eyes. 'Cry today, Addison. Feel today because tomorrow you are ice. No emotion. Nothing. Tomorrow you are stone.' She said to herself before leaving her reflection and moving into the room..

She got in bed and reached under the pillow for the thing that had kept her company for the last few days, Meredith's Dartmouth shirt. She brought it to her chest and cried some more until her heavy eyes closed and she drifted into sleep as words echoed in her head. 'Tomorrow you are stone.'

And then there were 9! I hope you enjoyed. Don't hate me. Also to the people that like Derek, I don't necessarily hate him I just don't particularly like him either, so he gets to be the bad guy. Which lets face it he kinda already is being toxic and such, but that's besides the point. We don't need a debate. Like I said I hope you enjoyed it. Remember to leave some comments and stuff just so I know how it's going, k? Guess I'll see ya next time. See what Addison does. ;)