"How can I help?" Amity desperately asked as Magnus peered into Luz's unconscious mind, "As Luz's girlfriend it's my duty to…"
"Child, please." Magnus groaned as he held his hands to Luz's temples in an attempt to establish a psychic link, "Your enthusiasm is appreciated, if not slightly annoying, but I doubt there's much you could do to when it comes those touched by the Warp. This "Luz" seems to have potent potential as a psyker, but that poses a litany of risks that could…"
"Risks?!" Amity shrieked as she pulled at her hair in a bout of fright, "What kind of risks? We need to wake her up NOW!"
"What do you think I'm trying to do, child?" Magnus indignantly growled, "Luz's psyker abilities awakening put a grievous mental strain on her. An untrained psychic mind is a delicate thing, we must approach this situation cautiously or…"
"Luz!" Amity cried as she rushed towards her human, recklessly trying to shake her awake, "Wake up, please! I know you're in their!"
Amity paused as a certain thought crossed her mind, spreading a crimson blush across her face.
"You know, in the fifth Good Witch Azura Hecate wakes up Azura with true love's k…"
"Ugh…" Magnus groaned, "Companion, could you please restrain this hormone-addled teen?"
Kitten silently approached the witch and effortlessly lifted her in the air. She kicked and reached out her arms in an attempt to reach Luz, but such an effort was futile when in the clutches of a Custode.
"Put me down, I can help!" Amity begged, "You don't know what you're doing! Only someone as close as her awesome girlfriend would know what to do!"
"What on Terra is going on between you two?" a truly baffled Kitten asked.
"Really?" Magnus asked, shooting a puzzled gaze as Kitten, "She has mentioned their relationship more times than I can count! And unlike the average Astartes I'm actually capable of counting to a number higher than ten."
"Uh…" Kitten droned, understanding he should know something about these two that escaped him.
"They're dating." Magnus began, trying to find a euphemism that might penetrate Kitten's thick skull, "They're, you know… friends of Celestine?"
"Oh… Ohhhhhh!" Kitten gasped with sudden realization, "Apologies, but centuries without even seeing a woman can make a man quite oblivious to these sorts of things."
"Centuries without seeing a certain buff fish-woman." Magnus quipped.
"Not canon." Kitten insisted.
"I mean, I'm here for it." Amity interjected.
"NOT CANON!"
"Can we stop with the mindless blithering!" Magnus shouted in an uncharacteristic bout of anger, "If I don't make haste than this 'Luz' is at serious risk of daemonic possession! I don't think Amity wants a possessed girlfriend, and nobody wants a daemonhost running rampant in the Imperial Palace!"
Meanwhile, in the echelons of Luz's mind, Magnus managed to make a faint echo with his psychic prowess.
"Luz? Child?" his voice calmly beckoned, "Can you hear me?"
Luz slowly opened her eyes. She found herself in an endless void, one exactly the same as the one Eda was in for the last two chapters so I won't bother explaining it again. She sat herself up and took in her surroundings, and a deep sense of dread filled her soul at being lost in such an empty space.
"Hello?" Luz called out as she rose to her feet, "I… I thought I heard someone… is anybody out there?"
Luz slowly dragged her feet and walked outward into the void, hoping to find some other soul to save her from this aching loneliness.
"Hello?" Magnus' voiced echoed from outside Luz's mind, "Child?"
"You!" Luz cried as she looked upwards, hoping to find the source of this voice, "Who is that? Can you hear me? Somebody, please?"
Luz stopped her endless pleading when she noticed a sound in the distance. It was a guttural and slovenly sound, like a starving dog slopping up its freshest kill. It sent a shiver down Luz's spine, and she cringed in disgust, but it was still the only signs of anything existing in the void besides herself. Luz cautiously approached the sound which only grew more explicit and grotesque as she neared. She could make out grinding teeth, smacking lips, and slobber dripping from something's mouth.
It wasn't long before Luz finally found the source of these sounds – after all, being in an empty void leaves little room for distraction. Luz saw some pink and misshapen… thing crawling on the ground. Once she grew closer, she could see it was furiously licking at the ground with an elongated and pointed tongue. It didn't seem to notice her as is mindlessly dragged its bloated body with clawed hands, continuing to lick the floor every step of the way. The creature's head was adorned with a pair of elegant purple horns, and its body was so fat that seemed unable to hoist its weight on its legs.
"Are…" Luz stuttered, "Are you a daemon?"
"Whoa! What the f**k?!" the creature shouted as it sucked its tongue back into its mouth, "Who the f**k are you? I thought I was alone here!"
The creature sat itself upright and stared at Luz with utter befuddlement.
"Uh…" Luz stammered, "Well, I'm a human, and, well, I think we're in my head?"
"Ohhhhh…" the daemon sighed before slapping himself on the forehead, "Duh! I'm, like, supposed to possess you or something!"
"Uh…" Luz nervously continued, "So I'm guessing you are a daemon?"
"Oh, right!" the creature replied, "So I'm, like, a daemon of Slaanesh, bruh. God of pleasure and junk, you know how it is."
"Dios mio…" Luz gasped, "I can't be possessed by some perv-daemon! I'm a teenager!"
"Hey, relax dude." The daemon reassured Luz, "Sure, some of the boys are about the whole 'sex, drugs, and rock n' roll' vibe, but I'm more of a 'sloth and gluttony' sorta dude, ya know? I'm just lookin' to blaze a few doobs and watch Ridiculousness until I can no longer feel the crushing weight of existential dread that inherently comes with a sentient existence! Speakin' of, you got any… you know?"
The daemon made a strange rolling gesture with its right thumb and forefinger that was lost on Luz.
"I… have no idea what you're talking about." Luz admitted.
"Aw, come on, man!" the daemon protested, "You know, Mary Jane? The Devil's Lettuce? Reefer McEntire?"
"Sorry," Luz apologized, still confused, "I have no idea what you're talking about."
"Ugh…" the daemon groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose in an exasperated gesture, "You know what? This place is, like, killing my high. Sorry, I'm out."
With a puff of pink smoke, the daemon vanished from Luz's mind. With the threat now gone, cracks began to appear in the void that released beams of white light. As the light slowly engulfed Luz, she couldn't help but feel a mix of relief and discomfort.
"I know that daemon didn't possess me…" Luz thought to herself, "But somehow I still feel like I've lost my innocence."
The light grew around the human and blinded her eyes before a sudden jolt shook her body into consciousness. Luz slowly opened her eyes and found herself in a gilded chamber, with a one-eyed red giant looming over her.
"Well," Magnus began, "I've no idea how that happened, but she's awake and, by the looks of it, completely daemon-free…"
"Luz!" Amity cried as she slithered free from Kitten's grasp. She ran to Luz and smothered her with a tight embrace.
"I'm so glad my awesome girlfriend's okay!"
"We get it!" Magnus groaned.
"Are you alright? Do you need anything?" Amity frantically asked, "You were out for a while… is your blood pressure low? I could get you a juice box and some cookies if you want… you, banana boy!"
Kitten raised an inquisitive eyebrow and pointed to his chest in a gesture that said, "Did you really just call me banana boy?"
"WE NEED A JUICE BOX AND COOKIES!" Amity shouted.
"Amity…" Luz sighed, placing a gentle hand on the witch's cheek, "I'm fine. I appreciate you worrying about me, but you don't need to worry about me all of the time."
"But…" Amity stuttered, "What if you weren't okay? If I failed, you'd never want me…"
"Amity." Luz interrupted, "I'm just happy you're hear. You don't need to prove you're good enough to be my girlfriend. If I didn't like you for you, I never would've asked you out to begin with."
"Hey!" Amity bluntly asserted, "I asked you out."
"I did it first!" Luz teased.
"Your naïve feelings are making me sick." Magnus interjected.
"Really?" Kitten asked, "I mean, I thought it was kind of sweet…"
"Enough!" Magnus roared as he rose to his feet, "While we are thankful for Luz's safe return there is still an imminent danger. The fact remains that, as an untrained psyker, Luz is still at risk of being corrupted by the tainted energies of the Warp. We will need to cover extensive lessons in Warp-sorcery and control to allow her to utilize her inane gifts properly!"
"Does that mean…" Luz gasped as she turned her head towards Magnus, "A MAGICAL TRAINING MONTAGE?!"
"What?" Magnus asked as the strange power of jingoistic 1980's action movie clichés overcame his body, "No, that's not what I… wait… what's happening?
With generic synthpop blaring in the background, the quartet engaged in an intense regiment of training Luz's body, heart, and soul to contain the immense magical energies that now flowed through her. Magnus taught Luz of the nature of Warp magic and how to prevent it from overcoming her, Kitten trained her in combat and martial prowess, Amity provided much needed moral support because that's what healthy couples do, and there was one break where the group had a tea party in animal-onesies. After about one minutes and forty-five seconds, the montage came to a satisfying close.
"What an efficient way to train!" Kitten excitedly remarked, "Wait, why were we having tea in animal jammies?"
"What happens in the montage, stays in the montage!" Luz insisted.
"Well, I certainly can't deny your magical prowess!" Magnus joyfully commented, "Warping reality to complete a full training regiment in under two minutes? You show true promise!"
"Awesome!" Luz gleefully squealed, "So now we can get to saving my friends and destroying…" Luz paused as she suddenly realized what she was about to say might mean to Magnus and Kitten.
"Destroying this timeline?" Magnus knowingly asked, "I know. I had precognitions of your arrival."
"Wait, what?!" Kitten cried, "That's why they're here?"
"Of course." Magnus explained, "What these two and their entourage can provide us is Secher Nbiw. The Golden Path, so to speak. They offer an opportunity to separate the Materium from the Immaterium. A realm where humanity is free from the chains of Chaos."
"I'm not gonna be lectured on Chaos from the scrowder that broke the Webway Project…"
"No time for that now!" Magnus nervously interrupted Kitten, "We, the Emperor's chosen, know that most humble of truths. While our very lives may be forfeit, to do so for a future that ensures the prosperity of humanity would be a truly deserving end."
"Weren't you telling us about the merits of Chaos just a few episodes ago?" Kitten asked.
"Companion, I…"
Magnus paused as he sensed something amiss in the palace. It was a malignant energy – Warp magic. He could feel the power growing as he tried to locate its source, much to the confusion of the other three in the chamber. Suddenly an azure portal ripped through the space above them, revealing a maddening void that emanated malice.
"Aw s**t, it's Tzeentch." Magnus groaned.
Much to Magnus' surprise, the mollusk-deity of trolling did not traverse through the portal. Rather, a trio of humans came hurdling out and crashing to the floor before the portal abruptly dissipated.
The quartet approach the bodies with morbid curiosity. They saw an abnormally tall and pale human adorned with a purple toga clutching two witches. The human was lying on his back, and from the patterned cracks in the floor it was clear that his body took the entirety of the bloow from their fall.
"Gus and Willow…" Amity gasped.
"And… Fulgrim?" Luz added.
"Wait…" Magnus interrupted, "That is Fulgrim, it's human Fulgrim! What on Terra is he doing here?!"
Magnus grabbed the clone by his shoulders and hoisted him into the air. He violently shook his body, hoping to grasp one moment of consciousness.
"Fulgrim? Fulgrim, is that you?" Magnus interrogated, "Wake up, Gods dammit! I demand answers!"
"Buh…" Fulgrim grunted as his eyes half-opened, "Hello, barista. I'll take a light roast with coconut milk and stevia… and don't think of adding almond milk, I can taste the difference!"
Fulgrim let out a final sigh as his body once again went limp and his mind slid back into sleep. Magnus gently laid his body on the floor between the two sleeping witches.
"I'm sure there's an explanation for all of this." Magnus explained, "No need to worry."
"I worry a lot…" Kitten sighed.