05/12/1992

We're at Funtimez. In theory we're watching Babs, but in reality me and Bugs are sitting across from each other, him reading a paper and me writing in this. I pretty much bring it everywhere with me now. In case I get so annoyed I need to to write. I'm not annoyed now though. Mainly bored.

There's no point even trying to talk in a soft play area, you can't hear a word anyone's saying. Thank Avery for signs is all I can say.

The whole reason we're here is because Babs wanted something to do and me and Bugs are weak. Elmyra's at her parents for the weekend. I dropped her off yesterday and the two of them grinned at me. Always smiling that pair. It's unnerving, especially if you're in a bad mood like I was. I'm trying to get everything done before we break up for Christmas, I need to finish my module.

"Well, what's the rush?" Bugs said, in bewilderment as I flung Elmyra's stuff in a suitcase. [She'll claim she's packed and ready to go as long as she's got her stuffed dog with her. Small things like clean clothes, and toothbrushes and that kind of things don't cross her mind.]

"It might have escaped your notice, Bugs." I snapped, as I sat on Elmyra's case. "But I actually have rather a lot to do this weekend. My course needs wrapping up and tonight's already gone. So I've only got tomorrow and Sunday, tomorrows probably out because we've got to look after Buster and Babs and so's Sunday-"

"Why's Sunday out?"

"Well, the mornings alright, but Elmyra comes back late afternoon and then I've got to help her with her homework-"

"Why?"

"Because otherwise SHE'LL NEVER DO IT!"

"No, I mean why are YOU doing it? Last time I checked Elmyra had two sets of parents. Why can't her created parents help her with her homework? After all she's spending all the weekend with them already, would it really kill em to do some of the boring things as well?"

I went to argue with him, then realised he actually had a point. "I'ww mention I drop her off tonight."

"Don't just 'mention' it." Bugs said, making air commas with his fingers. "Make it a 'firm' suggestion, if ya get me drift." I must not have looked like I got it because he sighed. "For Jones's sake, Elmer, tell them they need to look at the homework and help her with it!"

"What if they can't do it?" I fretted.

Bugs rolled his eyes. "They've been designed as adults - with three kids no less! - if they don't have a basic grasp of shapes there's no hope for 'em. Not only that but I mentioned it to Scratchy and he said they've both been designed with a high-school level of education and got through the grades easily. Her dads an inventor, don't forget."

Like I could forget that. Every time me or Bugs go over there somethings exploding. As a matter of fact that's what happened yesterday when we dropped Elmyra off. We pulled up and there was a bang followed by the roof shooting about five metres in the air before landing back again. The her dad, Edward, came staggering out the house, face black with ash, and waved blindly at us. "Hello Elmyra!" He shouted. "Good to see ya!"

Elmyra laughed, jumped out the car and hugged him, which was sweet.

"Good to see you, Elmer!" Edward said, brightly. "Thanks for droppin' her off, it's much appreciated. I'll see you Sunday, yeah?" And he turned to go.

I called him back and 'suggested' either he or Emily [Elmyra's mother] may want to help her with her homework at some point this weekend?

He looked quite surprised I was asking him and said he would have a look at it personally. He was quite sure it would be easy, he was an inventor, didn't I know? [I did know.]

So I left Elmyra in the capable hands of her parents and went back home again. I had been gone for less than an hour and the house was in chaos. I went in and Bugs, Buster and Babs were sitting in the living room eating there dinner. As opposed to the kitchen where the should have been.

"What are you doing in here?" I asked, irritably.

"Pop said we could eat it in here." Buster said, as he shovelled in a mouthful of food. "And watch telly."

I glared daggers at Bugs. "Did he now?"

"Relax, Elmer." Bugs said, in a kind of 'go away' tone. "I just thought it'd be nice to have it in here for a day. After all. It is Friday."

I wasn't happy, but seeing as they were already more than halfway through dinner, I didn't feel I could really demand they move now. And it would just make me look like the bad guy, not Bugs. And after the conversation with Elmyra's parents I was exhausted as it was.

Anyway. That was Friday. Today we were planning to have a quiet night in, maybe play some board games or something later on, followed by a movie and let the kids stay up a bit later. You know, as a treat. 8:00 instead of 7:30. That went out the window when Hampton called and asked if Buster would like to come over for a sleepover tonight. Short notice, he knew, but Porky had said it was alright and-

It was at this point I plucked the phone out of Busters hand and demanded to speak to Porky. Sure enough, it turned out to be 'legit', as kids apparently say now, and Buster was duly sent off, with a suitcase in his hands, to Porky's as him and Plucky would be staying the night. Unfortunately though they didn't want Babs, much to her annoyance. Bugs found her on the phone trying to organise her own sleepover. [Without ASKING us first, obviously] Shirley couldn't come and Pepe, Penelope and Fifi were doing something else tonight, so they couldn't come over either.

"It's not fair!" Babs yelled. "Everyone's busy!"

"Er - tone the volume down, young lady." I said, sternly. "You're indoors, remember?"

"But IT'S NOT FAIR-!"

"Okay, where do you wanna go?" Bugs asked, cutting over her.

Less than one hour later we were in 'Funtimez' - the biggest soft play area in Toontown! Fun for all the family! [As long as they're under the actual age of 13] And as I mentioned, it's SO noisy we can't hear ourselves think, let alone have a civilised conversation, so I'm writing in this to pass some time.

Tell you what, I won't be sad when this is over. Actually hold that thought, Bugs is getting us a drink.