Samurai SEED

by AJ-Writer

Kira's a lowly ramen bar waiter in wartorn world. Thrust into an age of warriors where legends are made, Kira don a mask and found he's fighting not only against his enemies but also his very own demons. New chapter is up! PLEASE, PLEASE Read and Review!

61. Dance of Shadow and Light Part 1

Kira - Noir & Kage

Lacus - Hikari

Athrun - Rosso

Chapter 61

The Dance of Shadow and Light – Part 1:

Darkness in Paradise

00000008 years ago0000000

"…so…"

Rosso stood ready to accept his judgment before the Supreme Judge, AKA Big Boss, AKA Ray Yuki, AKA his mother's latest failed attempt at cooking…

…wait, what?

"Before I drag your sorry ass back to Aprillus… can you please explain what is happening here?"

(A still smoking) Ray Yuki was referring to this pack of actual children and figurative man child in dunce hats.

"…it started two days ago…"

0000000

Two days ago was the first time Rosso began to notice the symptoms of this acute lack of common sense…

To begin with, most people in Februarius did not understand the very concept of Law Enforcements. In here, the law enforce themselves… so they fail to understand the need for it to be enforced by a special agency like the Judges. In layman's terms, they don't understand what exactly a Judge does. That was the first symptom.

Second symptom: Noir became famous overnight. After that death match, suddenly, he is now a household name and Februarius, especially Gateway city, literally became his playground. And don't get him wrong: this is not a bad thing. The issue here… he was famous for his crime solving wisdom and sharp intelligence… NOT.

Rosso had been informed by madame Helga and the kids that his best friend had been tasked to go around tasting food from various restaurants across the city. Part of his induction into the culinary world, so to speak. And he was very good at it, apparently. Up until the whole food poisoning thing was made public, people actually welcomed him coming to check up on their restaurant from time to time. Fact is, as his repertoire of taste and cooking skill continue to increase exponentially under Helga's tutelage, his review of the restaurant he visited became increasingly in depth, as does his criticism. And this was no ordinary criticism either, but the epitome of constructive criticism. As his understanding of the culinary world grew, Noir would often make notes on how he would improve a menu he tasted. This was just his own personal opinion and usually he kept these notes for himself. But legend has it, one time, he accidentally left one such note in a restaurant. The chef found those notes… and swallowed enough of his pride to follow through with its criticisms…

Nowadays, people need to book three months in advance to sample that restaurant's vastly improved menu. And after that, many restaurants were literally begging for Noir to come, the whole food poisoning shenanigans was swiftly swept under the rug.

Between this… and the common knowledge that the fight with Britannia ultimately revolves around food… followed by a blinkered logical thought process that Athrun still had a hard time understanding… everyone immediately thought that Judges and thus the Circle are a specialized agency of Food Critics.

Want proof? A mere day after that whole food fight ended, a literal storm of letters from all the restaurants in Februarius came flooding in various magical ways. All of them asking for the black Judge to come and review their restaurant.

"…is this… are you serious? After all that blood and guts… this is what Judges became known for in Februarius…!?" Rosso read all these letters with twitching eyes as he scratched his smoking head.

"And why not?" And Noir can actually stay sane. That was the most error-does-not-compute fact for Rosso. "It's not like it's illegal or anything… and there are no rules saying Judges can't part time as food critics. Lord Yuki gave me permission."

"They even created a rating system to go with it!" Lacus chortled. "We called it Feathers, and it's based on Noir's now legendary complaints. Because he always had something to say. If a restaurant earned a good rating but also a lot of criticism from the Judge, it's one feather. Two feathers are when the comments are only two pages long. Three is when the complaints are only a single page long. And lastly, the most prestigious achievement of all… the legendary Four Feathers… where the Judge was rendered completely speechless. Most foodmongers deemed it inexistent… except everyone acknowledged there's already one recipient… Madame Helga's legendary banquet-"

"Ano~o, milady? If you're quite finished, help me drag Rosso's ass off, I think his brain shortcircuited already."

"Arara…" Lacus would be happy to help, but her hands… Lamia sighed and rolled back her sleeves.

"Do all Judges tend to shortcircuit like so?" Lacus asked as she watched the blank eyed Rosso being dragged ass down by Noir and Lamia, reminiscent to how Lacus and Helga had done the same for Noir, day one.

"Only when there is too much stupid in the room."

Fortunately, Rosso's brain rebooted as they are on route to their destination.

Unfortunately, that was midair, on Godric's back, on a broom, and this is his first time flying, so naturally he panicked. What followed was just logic, and gravity did the rest.

"If we're meant to fly, we'd grow wings!" That was the first thing he said as he walked unscathed out of the crater he created when he free fell head first into the ground 500 meters below.

And that's how Athrun found out that day that he's not a fan of flying. "How come you guys can fly up there on that broom with no safety belts!?"

"What is safety belt?" The tree broom handlers: Lacus, Godric, and Rowena asked in concert.

The ceremonious answer so devoid of logic stunned Athrun into silence; he hopingly looked to his best friend, desperately begging for some explanation that will save his sanity and rationality. All he gets was a sympathetic broken spirited thousand yard stare from a man who had emptied all worldly thoughts and just had fun breathing.

"You get used to it." Noir lifelessly answered. "Whelp, the restaurant is around the corner anyway, so let's just walk the rest of the way."

"Agreed!" Lacus raised her hand in agreement. And like it was the most natural thing in the world, she run off and walk at Noir's side, almost clinging to him.

By the way, Lacus had appointed herself as Noir's assistant in this food tasting business. She helped Noir particularly in dealing with his lightweight condition.

"But, are you not his partner, Master Rosso?" Godric asked.

"I have a tastebud of a cardboard box, and that's a fact. I can't help him there." Again, Judges are Extra Judicial Agents of Law Enforcements, handpicked for their intelligence and inquisitive nature, NOT their palate.

"Speaking of which… Rosso, do you know why we're here?"

"Apart from your food tasting?"

"We're also here to meet some 'old friends' of lady Clyne. Some important personages of sensitive nature in a… rather touchy situation, so I'll be counting on you and everybody else for protection and privacy."

"Protection detail. Got it." Finally. Something that makes sense.

The meeting place in question is an Indian themed Restaurant, something rather rare and unusual in the European Zaft. Noir and Lacus took separate table from their escorts.

As Noir looked at the menu, Rosso and Lamia noticed Lacus' eyes were nowhere near the menu.

Lamia couldn't stop twitching at this… 'tense' atmosphere. In the last few days, Lacus had spent every moment and every chance she get to be close to the Judge… Heck, she'd still be sleeping with HIM if Lamia didn't pull her off it – ESPECIALLY knowing her Sister's sleeping habit. Rosso merely sighed. "Your sister is the first person I knew who would rather get close to a Judge than away from one. And I meant that as a compliment."

"My sister can be weird… but…" Lamia shrugged to Rosso. "…I can trust Noir, right?"

"…if you can't trust him, milady, then I don't know who else you can trust."

Just then, the waiter came and asked for an order. Noir picked the menu carefully. "I'll have this one."

"Good choice, sir. That is our restaurant's specialty. And for you miss?"

"I… I'll have what he's having." Lacus chuckled. She didn't read the menu at all… but if Noir think it's good, it'll be good for her.

"…are you serious?" Noir looked at her… with pity.

…wait… what? Lacus felt like she had forgotten something incredibly important… But… seeing his concerned eyes, and her worries just went out of window. "…It'll be fine."

"…" Noir looked like he was about to say something, but finally refrained. "These… people… will they answer your invitation?"

"Arara…? I wouldn't worry. They'll definitely come. All I have to do was mention your name."

"…why would that-"

"You've become terribly famous, Mr. Judge." Lacus chuckled. "And not just in this world, but also the other."

"…"

"…you… don't like it?"

"I felt a certain comfort in anonymity." Behold the biggest damage Carine inflicted on Noir: she had shown the Empire that the most infamous Judge of the Circle is not a make believe ghost story to scare children. He's very real. And he's in Februarius. It won't be long before a tirade of attention, friendly and not, to rain down upon him.

"Hmmm? Indeed…?" Lacus tilted her head. "…is that why they gave you the codename Noir? Black for shadow?"

"…sometimes it's best without the attention." Noir replied. "The things we see, the things we do… if you knew half the stuff we saw at daily basis in the shadows, you'd run away from this country in terror."

"But you don't." Lacus stopped tilting and gently looked at him straight in the eye. "You were always… looking at it. The darkness. The ugly. The places covered in shadows. Most of people would turn away and pretend it wasn't there… but you did not look away."

"…someone… has to." Noir paused… For the moment, it look as if he doesn't want to say anymore… but something about the earnest way Lacus looked at him straight in the eye… "…I… came from… that darkness."

"…!"

"…I was… I was… born in there. And for a while I lived in that darkness, no one sees you… but you can see everyone… So you see… I know its horror… its fear… but at the same time… I know its… cold comfort. The comfort of lurking in shadows, where no one will bother you… where most of things you do can go unseen and unnoticed. I think that's why I was so good at finding things in the darkness."

"…but it's still cold… right?"

"Hm?"

"…" Lacus looked at him with pity in her eyes. "…darkness won't keep you warm at night. It must've been cold… and lonely. Why… would you want to live like that?"

"…" At this, Noir didn't answer. Lacus, noticing she touched a nerve, chose wisely not to force the issue.

Fortunately, it was amidst this uneasy silence that the meals are served, And when she looked at the served meal… that's when Lacus finally remembered that incredibly important something she had forgotten.

Two plates of curry rice redder than anything she had ever seen all her life were served at their table. The red chili fume from the terrifying number of chilies decorating its pitch black roux gave an illusion of the fiery flames of Hell. "The Maison Taj special: the Tandoori Chicken Curry of Seven Hells."

…what have she gotten herself into?

Noir took a spoonful of curry, eyed it carefully, and took a mouthful as he savored it quietly. Lacus took hers… with trembling fingers. She only managed a sip.

Her scream blew up the entire restaurant.

Or at least… that's what she knew would've happened if she did not immediately clasped her mouth to bit her lips to stop herself from screaming. She banged her head to the table again and again to make sure her resolve did not break. Every second it took for that one sip to flow down her throat into her stomach was an agony of infernal hell that seemingly lasted hours per second. "…" Still struggling to not literally explode, she looked at the other side of the table… and her worst nightmare was denied…

Because it was the sight of something even worse.

Spoonful after spoonful of curried chicken and rice kept disappearing underneath Noir's mask. And unlike Lacus who's flooded with sweat, he was obviously as dry as a bone. Lacus eyes widened… "A… Ano~o… t… h… how's… the food…!?"

"(Nom… nom…) Don't… (nom…) talk… (nom…) to me."

Lacus was stunned stupefied. He enjoyed it so much… like a kid who just found his new favorite toy, he doesn't want to be bothered by anything else… 'Oh no… oh dear god no…' His quill and note lay forgotten next to him. He did not say a word, not even a peep… His comment section. It's squeaky clean. Noir had found his soul food… and clearly a new addition to the Hall of Silent Four Feathers.

"Anoo… if you like, you can have mine…" Lacus pushed her share to Noir. He didn't even hesitate and her plate quickly diminished as well… Point in fact, Noir would ask for seconds. At which point, Lacus silently retreated to Rosso and Lamia's table in defeat. Her plan to get close to Noir was beaten by a plate… make that SEVERAL plates of super hot curry. A depressed Lacus buried her head on the table as Lamia quickly pat her sunken pink head.

It wasn't after his fifth plate that Noir finally recovered from his drive. But… there was nothing to comment on. It was fiery, it was spicy, the meat was juicy, the rice is plump and not overly seasoned… it was perfectly balanced, hands down delicious. "This is… amazing. But it's not just the taste… everything is… fresh." Noir began commenting as the waitress, an elderly Indian woman, stood proudly over the piles of empty plate.

"I can taste a LOT of spices… fresh spices…" Noir twitched and narrowed his eyes at the waitress. "Where did you get them?"

Before the woman can answer, a more familiar voice answered it for her. "We grow them all right here in our own backyard, honorable Judge."

Noir looked to the voice… and his eyes widened in disbelief. "…Ashem?"

Rosso jerked in shock as well. Ashem. Lady Catherine's secret lover in the Reingraze case. Both Judges quickly stood up to get a better look… and it's him. That young tanned boy they rescued from false charges is standing there smiling widely.

"Ashem?" Rosso quickly approached Noir's table just as Ashem respectfully close the distance.

"Judge Noir, Judge Rosso… I'm truly honored to serve you both this evening."

Noir and Rosso smiled in pleasant surprise. "You look well." Rosso noted the boy had changed greatly than he was when they first met him. He was skin and bone then. Now his body is still lean but it had more weight to it.

"I could say the same to you milords. Especially you, Judge Noir. You're actually walking now, without a walking stick too, Vishnu be praised!"

Noir chuckled. "What are you doing here?"

"After milady…" Ashem bit his lips a bit. "Well… I just don't feel like staying in Aprillus anymore. So my family and I decided to hell with it, and left. We heard there's a booming of restaurant business in Februarius, and as far as I know there is no authentic Indian cuisine on the block yet."

"Where did you get the spices?" Noir asked. "As in… you really grew them here? Straight up?"

"We brought the seeds in from Mumbai. And I grew them all here."

"Can I see?"

"Normally, we don't allow anyone into the Spice garden." Ashem smiled. "But you, milords, are not just anyone. It would be my honor to show you."

When Ashem led them into the garden, they were overwhelmed. A botanical marvel, that's how Rosso would best describe what he saw. Isolated in this glass house, various kinds of spices were grown here, lush and fresh. Coriander. Cumin. Cardamom. Clove. Fenugreek. Turmeric. Cinnamon. Pepper. Ginger. Nutmeg. Even Holy Basil. Februarius is a winter continent, but here inside the Greenhouse, the temperature had somehow been adjusted to a warm climate suitable for such plants to grow. And most amazingly…

"Merlin's Beard…" Rowena and Lacus looked around with their magic sense. "How did you do this? I sensed not a single drop of Magic in the air!"

"What?" Noir gawked. "…you did all this… without magic?"

"My family's Muggle. Couldn't use magic even if they want to."

Everyone balked speechless. "Dear God…" Rosso shook his head. The skill and care needed to tend out of season plants in land with inhospitable climate… without any magical aid… How come no one noticed this?

Ashem then asked Noir with a big grin. "So… my lord? How many feathers?"

"…" Noir rubbed his nose thinking hard. Right. The Feathers. "…I'd give you a solid Two, I suppose."

"Two!?" Lacus gawked. "You were practically at loss for words!"

"It's not about the food." Noir shrugged. "If I just declared you Four Feathers straight off, this time tomorrow, you'll be up to your neck with customer orders. Which is good, except…" The Judge gestured at the greenhouse. "…this Greenhouse, which is the cornerstone of your dishes, won't be able to handle that kind of pressure. Build up a strong foundation first. Two feathers for first timer is more than enough. Give it a few years… then we'll see."

Ashem nodded in understanding. As expected of Judge Noir. He thinks things through. "But two feathers… huh?"

"If you're worried about competition, don't bother." Noir nodded. "There's going to be a booming surge on the market sometime soon in the future. You and your family are now ideally prepared to face it. This I can promise."

"Then I gladly take your word for it, Honorable Judge. Namaste."

Just then, the waitress from before arrived in a hurry. "T… there are several guests at the door, they say they have a meeting with a Master Noir?"

Noir and Lacus looked at each other. That would be their long awaited Guests. "Showtime."

When the group returned to the dining hall, several cloaked figures had been seated on the corner of the room. Noir and Lacus quickly headed towards said table, while the security details took their place around the perimeter. As a special treat, Ashem was allowed to listen, but he's watched closely by Rosso.

As Noir and Lacus approached, the cloaked figures, numbering two, shifted their heads towards them and made a gesture. Noir and Lacus returned the gesture, and they took the empty seats in front of the two characters.

"Thank you for answering to our invitations in so short of notice, highnesses." Lacus started.

"Likewise, old friend." One answered with a soft gentle voice, which reminded the listener to the breezing of winds.

"Is this him?" The other figure also spoke. Both were clearly female voices, but this one is very energetic and noticeably feral…

"Yes." Lacus gestured to her side. "My ladies… this is the venerable Judge Noir."

"Magister Judge Noir, at your service." The Judge nodded.

"Huh." The Energetic one shrugged. "You're smaller than I imagined."

Noir didn't react. "If it's not too much, we'd like to go straight to business."

"Oh my, straight forward."

"Aww, it's uncouth to talk business straight off. We're in the restaurant, can't we eat first?"

"You glutton."

Noir raised an eyebrow. So the energetic one is the hyper type, and the quiet one is the sisterly type. "Of course. Ashem, we could use a menu here!"

"Coming!"

"Meat! Meat! Do you have anything with meat in it?"

"I want none of that meat in my plate. Do you have any Vegetarian. Pure vegetarian?"

"We have actually. I shall make the order."

"I want one more of that Tandoori Seven Hells, please."

At this, Lacus glared at Noir. "You ate several plates of that Hell on Earth already, and you want MORE!?"

"You're the one who said I should eat a lot." Noir further added. "Besides, you've seen how the dishes were made here: everything is organic. Free Range chicken, home grown spices… not a single drop of magic was used. This is the epitome of healthy food, right here."

Lacus made an ugly face. She dreadfully looked at the menu more carefully. "Is there anything on the menu that isn't heavily spiced?"

"This is Indian restaurant. EVERYTHING is spiced."

That right there, is the pronunciation of despair for Lacus. "Don't you have anything like ice cream or something?"

"In a winter island?" Everyone except Lacus, chorused. Only Fortescue had managed that, and he's retired.

Ashem quickly think it through. "Well… the Naan is not spiced, but it is kinda bland."

Lacus finally ordered that… then she buried her head down to sulk.

Watching her antics, the Sisterly One chuckled. "You're more interesting than I thought, Master Noir. Never have I seen someone who can put Lacus down a notch like this."

"You live and you learn, lady… I'm sorry?"

"Where are our manners? Forgive us." The hooded women finally lowered her hood, revealing a refined beauty with white skin, high nose bridge, and almond eyes. Like a flawless finely honed blade. Her long pointy ears extended out of her dark green long hair. "I am Sakuya, Lord and Lady of the Slyphan Aelves of the Woodland realm."

"And I'm Alicia." The other lowered her hood as well, revealing a cute childish girl face full of energy. In place of ears, she had a pair of cat ears extended up her blonde hair/fur. "Mistress of the Beastmen clan. Nice to meet you."

Elves and Nekomimi. Noir and Rosso nodded. Definitely a land of dreams for some people. But this also makes a lot of sense about a lot of things. Lacus data regarding the study of human lifespan in Februarius can only be made by someone who can live for hundreds of years. It stood to reason that only the Elves with their legendarily long lifespan are capable of such study.

"Once again, your highnesses, I thank you for answering to our call in so short of a notice." Noir bowed his head.

"Yes. And I feel like I've just heard a glimpse of what you wish to talk about. The dishes in this restaurant were made without magic you say? When I made that study about human lifespan, I did guess food played a part… But I did not see magic being the specific cause."

"With respect, milady. This is not something Magical beings such as yourself can perceive. For beings that were able to use Ether as sustenance, you would not see it as detrimental."

"Truly. So you're saying you had the advantage of outside perspective… you say?"

"I'm a Muggle. I can't use magic, so… I had to constantly think other ways to understand things. I'm simply in a better position to catch up on the clues." Noir crossed his arms. "But… if I may ask, milady… why did you make that human mortality thesis in the first place? It's human matter. You're an Elf. Why the interest?"

"Hm… it interest me, precisely because it is interesting. Human, that is. I may not look like it… but 200 years ago… I've met the Wise King, in person. Wisest human I've ever met. Even now, when many of my people had begun to see humans in brighter light, none yet hold a candle to him. I had much fun with him… and I do mourn his passing. So… I thought to myself… what are the odds of someone like him might show up again in human lifetime? Thus began my study… which yielded unexpected findings."

"Is Lacus the only person you ever told about these findings?"

"She's the only one who paid attention. She's the only one who had a mind to ask it of me."

"…and no one else made this study besides you?"

"Not that I'm aware of." At this Sakuya's eyes quickly narrowed. "Do you suspect someone did, child?"

"If there is, they have purposefully kept it hidden to a critical stage. For whatever reason, we cannot wait any longer."

Sakuya smirked. "Your plan is a bold one, child. But… It is very hard to fill a cup that is already full."

"I've already emptied some of that cup." Noir firmly stated. "The tale of my food fight with the Britannians is the current hot topic right now. Everybody knows the story, and everybody wants in on the action. What they're dying to know… is how it happened. Lacus told me there will be an International Wizard and Witches convention in a few days. Which is a perfect stage for a worldwide announcement for all wizarding community across the world."

"…and you want me to reveal the truth right then and there… with some of your refinements. I see." Sakuya nodded. "But I'm not working a charity, child. What do I get for my trouble?"

"…I thought you find us interesting?"

"True. But I get enjoyment from that. What do I get from this?"

"Easy." Noir crossed his arms. "You get the credit. All of it. Purge all mention of my name ever being involved at all. This is your thesis, 100%. I'm just one of your many nameless helpers, if they asked. That doesn't break the three rules, does it?"

"Whoa, you want no recognition? At all?" Alicia blurted.

"I fail to see why you don't want this. Consider the history between human and elves, which is still on shaky tension at times even today. Now humans gonna owe you their lives and you Elves get the bragging rights. Imagine its effect on future Human Elves dealings."

Sakuya and Alicia glanced at each other for a bit, clearly deliberating Noir's offer. After a moment, Sakuya looked straight at Noir. "…one last question for you then."

"Shoot."

"Why… do you want ME to do this? With your current celebrity status, you can easily do this without my help. You have more than right and authority to do so."

"It's because… I'm human."

"Oh?"

"This is a problem that affects humans… and ONLY humans. Other magical beings are clearly unaffected. And that is the problem. If some famous influential human suddenly start blabbing about the dangers of magic and its impact on human mortality rate… how would the other ignorant simpleton and reactionary dotards respond? The last thing anyone want, is for an anti nonhuman sentiment to grow into some human supremacy sentiment, and before you knew it, some damned fool started panicking, causing an incident, and a new war break out while we still have one going on this side."

Sakuya smiled. "And what do YOU get out of this?"

"Peace of mind." Noir answered short. "Human idiocies had caused me headaches at daily basis. No need to add other races into it."

Sakuya smiled and exchanged looks at an also smiling Alicia before they both chuckled. "I know humans can be wise… it just never occurred to me to look for it in an 8 year old child."

"Did you guess my age, or did Lacus told you?"

"I'm several thousand years old, little one. You pick things up, even with that distortion cloak." Sakuya smiled. "I will do it. But apart from the credit, you will also owe me a favor. Whenever I needed it, I can call on your services once."

"Deal." Noir and Sakuya then shook hands. It was also around that time Ashem returned with their ordered food.

Everyone eat happily, even the non human guests.

"This chicken! Nom, nom! The fibres of the meat is very luscious and vibrant! It had an active life!" The carnivorous Alicia happily wolfed down the drumsticks on each of her hands.

"This… vegetarian curry rice…" Sakuya was similarly pleased. "I initially had my misgivings… but there really isn't any meat in it… yet I did not think it could be this flavorful!"

"And he made this without a single drop of magic." Noir pointed with his spoon. "Once the announcement is made, THIS will become the spearhead for the booming of restaurant industry in this region."

"So you're saying if I make my thesis known, there will be more good food like this all around?" Sakuya grinned ear to ear. "Well, if that's the case, then let's make this happen, master Judge!" Sakuya and Alicia raised their glasses.

Noir nodded, and he and Lacus too raised their glass and everyone toasted.

Rosso smiled in relief. All's well, end well.

…or so he thought.

The issue came when it comes to payment. At first, Ashem refused payment. "How could I possibly extract payment from my benefactor?"

"Look, if I keep eating like this, you'd go bankrupt. And you just opened! Let's at least count just how much do I owe you, then if you insist, you can give me a 50% discount out of the goodwill of your heart."

So, the tally is this: Sakuya: 1x Vegetarian curry – 5 sickle, Alicia: 3x Meat Lover Curry – 24 sickle, Lacus: 1x Naan – 3 sickle, Rosso and Godric: 10(Rosso) + 2(Godric) x Chicken Curry – 60 sickle + 5x Tandoori – 25 sickle, Rowena and Lamia: 2x Vegetarian Curry – 10 sickle, Noir: …9x Tandoori Seven Hells – 90 sickle. With drinks – 50 sickles. "Right. Soo… how much is this in Galleon…?"

Before Noir finished calculating, Lacus just tossed the bag of coins into the counter. "Yep. That's about it!"

"Whoa! How much money is in that bag?" Noir asked in shock.

"Eh, just about the right amount! With tips!"

"Just about- oi! You can't do that!" Noir sighed. "Listen, you've had enough problem with money the other day, you should at least take it more seriously! Come on! Let's count it, okay? So… With all the aforementioned food… we owe Ashem…?"

"…a lot?"

It was in that moment… with that dumbass answer flowing out of Lacus' innocent lips… and as they looked around the room, they noticed little to no reaction from bystanders… It was then did the Judges, especially Noir… received… an earth shattering, mind blowing epiphany. "Ano~o…" Noir addressed Godric with much trepidation. "I'm hoping I'm wrong here… but… can you… can ANY of you… count how many sickles… did we owe Ashem-kun?"

"Umm…" Godric blinked. Noir twitched.

"uhhh…" Lamia frowned. Rosso gawked in disbelief.

"267 sickles." Rowena answered after no small amount of straining of her brows.

"How much is that in Galleon…?"

"Ummm… one moment…"

And Lacus… she just innocently tilted her head with her trademark innocent smile. "Tee-hee! A lot?"

SNAP.

…Alicia and Sakuya ran for their lives out of the restaurant…

…Ashem and Rowena duck for cover behind the counter…

The two Judges just about had it… They've put up… with a LOT of nonsensical thing on this… abnormal continent. But this?

This is just… too much.

"ALL HANDS UP AND AT E~EEM!"

And the trumpet sound and Hell was unleashed…

0000000

"…and that's how it is." Athrun finished his explanation as to why Ray Yuki was welcomed with the sight of Lacus, Godric, Lamia, even Rowena and Hugo… all of them, bar Rowena, are wearing dunce hats, doing math exam with Noir watching at their back with a horsewhip.

For the record, understanding of arithmetic at the time is a very rare thing. Most commoners could not afford the education. Few people can truly read, even fewer can do addition, much less multiplication. Such education was the privilege of the upper class. Of course, Kira was one of the few lucky exceptions. And since he and Athrun are both Judges, advanced arithmetic formed the very core of their being Judges. What particularly pissed Kira off more than anything is the fact everyone he tested fail for arithmetic belonged to the said privileged upper class who SHOULD'VE had the luxury of that education. And their excuses for this gross lack of understanding of this privileged but squandered commodity?

Godric: "I was too busy training swords and magic all day… I spare too little time on this… ahaha… my bad. I'm ashamed." – at least he admits it.

Hugo: "It's not that I don't have the time… I can gather the time but regrettably, I… I'm a bit slow on the uptake…" – Where there's a will, there's a way.

Rowena: "I still haven't grasped the intricacies of multiplication yet…" – Don't worry, ma'am, we'll get there!

Lamia: "Just… didn't seem very important… I do know how to count… but… not too advanced yet… as for addition and whatnot… never had the time." – there's some hope for her yet…

Lacus: "It's boring." – …ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?

That last excuse just set off all manner of rage bomb in Kira's mind, and every bit of self control he imposed upon himself just evaporated. For the first time in her life, Lacus found herself, a Clyne, to be outshouted.

"…that explains why her dunce hat was the biggest." Ray Yuki nodded, understanding his students' plight. Apart from the dunce hats recipients, there are also other children of the orphanage, Fayt, Roger, Pepitta, and others, who happily participate in the learning experience.

"That's not the reason." Rosso shook his head. "In the last 2 days of intensive study, Lacus tried to skip class 7 times. Noir caught her each and every time, and punished her severely for it with more homework than anybody else, and some more when she tried to skip that too. Finally… he had enough, and borrowed that dunce hat from Lord Balthazar. Said he used them to keep prisoners from escaping. Madame Helga, Godric, even Lady Ravenclaw jinxed it even further. She can't take it off, and every time she tried to run, it will scream and howl very loudly. And no, she can't use her bloodline limit to silence it. If she tried that, it will bleach her hair toxic neon green."

"Isn't that a bit… too much?"

"No." And Rosso said so without a hint of remorse or sympathy. "The last time she tried to escape, she set off a magical fireworks in the classroom. It accidentally burned the finished exam questions Noir and I spent all night grading – so we have to redo the exam." Thank goodness for their eidetic memory, they can rewrite the test questions. The answer though… "It was pure accident, but as you can just about imagine… everyone is quite pissed at her at the moment."

"…so… I see." That explains why Lacus had her four limbs chained to four different tables, seated by very pissed off occupants, her sister was one of them. Ray also noticed Athrun's disheveled hair, and Kira's brown hair was even more of a mess than ever. Both of their eyes are red and strained due to lack of sleep and stress. And parts of their attire were singed, some are still smoking. They looked like they just went through a war in the trenches.

"Time's up!" Noir declared, and everyone's quill stopped. The Masked Judge calmly gathered the exam papers, and graded what he can glance right on the spot. And he's happy to announce: "Marked improvements everyone, very good." Godric and Hugo in particular, earned the right to remove their dunce hats. "Lady Lacus?"

"Yes?"

"Supplementary lesson."

"What!? You haven't even graded it!"

Like he need to. "You wrote your answer in Haro language! This is a Math test, not artistic literature!"

"Uwaaaannn! Noir-kyun, you me~eaniee!"

"Mean and proud of it." And that's that. That's when Noir finally noticed Ray Yuki looking from the distance.

He nodded before he dropped half a dozen books at Lacus' table, each is twice as thick as her arm – all of them filled with questions. "Keep at it."

"Uwaa~aannn! Lamia-chaan help meee~e!" For once, Lamia found herself unable to sympathize.

Meanwhile, the Judges gathered around the Supreme Judge, and saunter far off… out of everyone's ear range… but not that far away from the Clynes.

"You look like you're having a good time." Ray smirked.

"Do I look… like I'm having a good time, boss?" Noir sighed. He looked very exhausted if anything else.

Ray smiled nonetheless. "Charles himself wrote to me. He knows about what happened with his daughters. He said he had no wish to declare Vendetta against you. He publicly declared you had a just cause."

"That's hardly surprising." Noir narrowed his gaze.

"Hardly." Ray nodded. "…though you'd be surprised just how much letter flooding the HQ, asking for you."

"That IS surprising." Noir raised an eyebrow. "Why HQ? I mean… I know they'll be coming for me but… they know I'm in Februarius, Carine saw to that. That was a few days ago. I'm surprised we're not being flooded by letters of that kind. In here, not HQ."

"Ah yes, that. I glanced at some of them, and they all complained none of the letters can reach you. Some of them I knew had sent agents here, and they can't seem to find you even with naked eye search. So they sent the letters to HQ instead. You're very skilled, but I don't recall disappearing completely off the grid to be one of your repertoires…"

"…! It's not." Noir shrugged. That sounds familiar. "But you found me."

"…well, I know where you are, you told me." Ray sighed. "What about you?"

"Me?"

"You look well." Noir's hand had clearly recovered, his gait is strong, the scarred tissue on his face was barely visible… "You came here… to heal. No matter how I see it, you've truly recovered… I'm here to pick up Rosso of course… but… Would you like to go home?"

Tchwachk!

Lamia jerked as Lacus just pressed her quill so hard it broke.

She was completely stiff… her eyes are trembling… she wasn't looking at anything, she was just… listening with baited breath.

"…" Noir remained silent for a few seconds… "…is that an order?"

Ray paused, then he shook his head with a smile. "…no. No, it's not an order."

Lacus held her breath… and closed her eyes for good measure…

"If it's not too much trouble…I'd rather stay here for now."

And Lacus' perked up in an instant.

"…I've… started something here… Something big and it can't be taken back." Noir explained. "…if I leave now… that will leave me with a bad taste in the mouth."

"That is… A VERY interesting choice of words." Ray chuckled. "You're serious about this culinary thing, aren't you?"

"My Lord, if you… feel uncomfortable about-"

"There's no rule saying Judges can't be Foodies." Yes, Ray is all too aware of what Judges had become in Februarius. "If this… is a sample of what Judges will become in a future without crime… I'm good with that."

And he patted Noir's head. "You stay here for as long as you wish. No need to worry about Aprillus, I can take care of it. Whenever you need to go elsewhere, just let me know. C.C. will help you, won't she?"

"You slave driver!" C.C. groaned.

"…and what about-" Noir turned to Rosso, but Athrun hastily replied. "You don't have to worry about… 'them.'" 'Them' of course, refer to Athrun himself and Kira's extended family. And of course he doesn't mind. For the first time ever, Kira finally found a place where he wants to be, doing what he liked instead of what he had to. "I'm sure 'they' would be more than happy to. Just be sure to keep in touch eh?"

"Alright."

"We'll see what we can do with the situation here from our side." Ray nodded then he turned to his other most decorated – soon to be punished - Judge. "Now come. Let's get you back home. You have some 'explaining' to do."

"Yes, milord." Rosso gave one last fist bump to Noir. "Good luck, brother."

And Noir, he welcomed it… with his now fully healed left fist bump. "Look who's talking. See you later, brother."

0000000-8 years later-0000000

"That was the last time I met him." After that, Lord Yuki put him through the wringer for breaking out suspension. Between that and the other job Noir asked of him… there was almost no contact. And then… there was no 'later'. 'The next time I see him again… Noir no longer existed.'

What happened to Kira after that…?

0000000-KIRA-0000000

Thankfully, the journey from the engine room back to the hangar was undisturbed. Rygart can only place the Captain in the safest place he can think of. "Captain, stay here."

Kage blinked several times as he just regained a greater measure of his consciousness. Looking to the left, he saw the word High Explosive shells. Looking the right, he saw helldart launchers. "…Mr. Arrow? Where… am I?"

"You're inside the Atilla's magazine. You'll be safe here. And you can call me Rygart, sir. My friends call me that."

"Okay, Rygart-san… you… I thought you were going to give me up?"

"…I did. But then… I measured my options: between the guy who's been showering me with bullets… vs the guy who's been vomiting blood because he had to cover my ass. Which one most likely will kill me, I ask?"

Kage smiled behind his mask. "Alright. Then my next question is… since when is a super tank's magazine loaded with ammunition a safe place?"

"Last place these guys would try to shoot. There's enough ammo to take out the whole car in here. They had to be crazy to do that."

"Wonderful." That notion clearly did not feel safe to Kage.

"Just sit tight, okay?" But no sooner than he said that Rygart saw Troopers pouring in. They don't look very happy. "Uh, Capt… that thing you said about if they're bad they'll shoot at us?"

"Yeah?"

One of the troopers caught sight of the mechanic in the Atilla's cockpit. And they made their intention known by opening fire. Rygart ducked beneath shattered glass. "Guess what? I just found them!"

By the sound of the gunfire, Kage can already tell. "It looks this whole train is filled with Corner's troopers. Or they've already killed those who aren't."

"Well… I guess that means it's okay for me to return fire."

"What?"

Rygart for one was getting fed up on being the wrong end of the gun all day. He start flicking a few switches, the Atilla began to growl. The smoke stacks at its back boomed. The troopers blinked. Did that Slayer Tank just… roared to life?

Rygart start getting busy. "Okay… now, let's see… this thing come fully loaded: one ballistic armor piercing artillery cannon, 2 sponson mounted twin linked gatling and… ah… central hull mounted Quad linked gatling gun." And fortunately, that one can be used right there from the main cockpit by one person. Better yet, the mechanism allowed the shooter to fire under cover. Rygart wasted no time and returned fire.

A rain of bullet storm hailed the troopers. They quickly ran into panic and cover.

Kage watched in shock and awe and wonder. "Mr. Arrow? Who are you really?"

"Like I said, I'm a mechanic. And to be more specific…" Rygart grinned. "I'm the mechanic tasked for the maintenance and assembly of one specific piece of hardware. This one." He jerked his thumb at the very tank they're sitting in, the Atilla.

The troopers had to hide behind cover as the Atilla continues to spray bullets at them like no tomorrow. For the moment, they are suppressed, unable to move. This enough time for Kage to start regaining his strength. His head still hurts, but he need to move.

"Captain, I suggest you stay put. I don't know what's wrong with you but… I doubt your injury is anything but light."

"…this isn't working."

"What?"

"You… manning the gun… spraying them with all the bullets in the world just to keep them away… this isn't working. This is not winning, this is just losing slowly."

"What do you think we should do?"

"Which car are we again?"

"….Uhh… we're in the third car to the front… actually."

"Okay… Now… for my next question: does this thing move?" And by this thing, Kage was jerking his finger at this tank.

"…I'm almost too afraid to answer that question."

"I'll take that as a yes. Now. How bout if you give me a crash course on how to drive this thing?"

"Hooo… boy… Rena's gonna kill me…"

"Not, if they kill you first."

00000000000000

What happened to Kira after that…?

That was Athrun's personal biggest mystery. And these five individuals might hold the key…

"…so… what about you guys?"

"…perhaps I should start?" Hugo raised his hand.

00000008 years later0000000

Hugo's Story:

For as long as he knew… Hugo had this… inferiority complex hounding him. His mother was the great chef. The food she made had earned the approval of Kings and Queens. And like his mother he likes to eat… alas, appetite was all he inherited from her. When he tried to cook, his burly fingers could not produce the delicate cuts her mother can create. When he tried to control the flame, he nearly burned his house down! He was clumsy, slow, stiff, and not very bright… it was obvious to him from very early on… he cannot be his mother. When he had a daughter, that daughter took after his wife, a strong kindly woman… but she's no cook. And neither is their daughter. But what burden him even more, was her mother's legacy. The greatest chef in the world had composed… a great number of recipes. But very few… none actually understand them all. Rowena Ravenclaw can memorize them all, but cooking them? The last cooking match had proven she was no great chef. It took a great chef to not only memorize the recipes, but also bring them to reality. Hugo inherited enough of his mother's passion to at least understand that much.

Lacus Clyne was her mother's first apprenti. A genius in her own right and, make no mistake, she had the skills… and the passion. Lacus Clyne's focus to a subject greatly dependant on her like or dislike of the matter. If she dislikes the subject, she wouldn't bat an eye even if she had a once in a millennium talent for it. But if that topic earned even half the attention… one can expect at least a breakthrough a century ahead of the time. Thankfully, her mother's cooking skills fall squarely on the latter category. Alas… her commitment to her ideals to pacifism saw she crippled her own hands, literally halving her potential.

And then there's Judge Noir. A mystery incarnate… but here are the facts: He had the golden tongue, he was clearly passionate about this, in one month while he was crippled, he still managed to memorize his Mother's teachings… even used some in practice… His only handicap was his injuries… which had miraculously healed by now. And his skills…?

"Well?" Today's menu was Boeuf Bourguignon Encroute with a side of sautéed Mushroom Ala Hufflepuff. One of her mother's most technical dishes. It is a Boueuf Bourguignon stew, stuffed inside a thick pastry, encroute style. When cut, the thick flavorful soup should pour out without the pastry being destroyed. When Helga cut the bread and the aromatic soup flowed out so beautifully, Noir had succeeded, at least that far. Next is the flavor.

"…what is this… flavor that is fighting against the wine?"

"I added a little Cheyenne and rubbed a bit of Garam Masalla on the beef… to mask the flavor of the papaya juice, and a bit more honey. I didn't put too much wine, so I need to balance it out and soften the meat some other way."

"You do understand you've just changed a recipe of a traditional food that had lasted 300 years?"

"All due respect Madame, I think 300 years is… long enough?"

Helga looked at Noir's masked face for a while as she tasted the soup again… and nodded in approval. He adjusted the recipe to compensate his inability to handle alcohol. "…at least I can tell you've tried to keep the traditional flavor intact. But… this could use some more improvements before we can serve it in my restaurant."

"Yes ma'am."

Noir had began the long arduous task of… cooking, by his count, all 4,000 plus recipes his mother had created. When he was crippled, Noir spent his every waking hour learning the basic theory of culinary arts that Helga can teach him. Reading book after book of cooking he can get his hands on, memorizing thousands of recipes. Such was his genius, within the first week he already memorized all the terminology and techniques of French Haute cuisine. Memorizing recipes is one thing… but his crippled state prevented him from practicing them. And now, at last, with his body fully recovered, he can begin his training in the earnest. In the last few days after he mastered he basics, he had managed to perfectly replicate quite a few of his mother's recipe that fulfilled her high standards. He even managed to adapt some of them to suit his handicap of being lightweight, while trying to keep the taste intact. His only flaw at the moment is simply his lack of practice… something time will easily fix, given his diligent nature. One simply cannot ask for a better successor for his mother. Her legacy might yet survive…

"My own restaurant?" Noir tilted at Lacus' comment on whether he wants to open his own restaurant as he tended to this grilled fish dish for today's breakfast. "You do understand I still got a LOO~ONG way to go right?"

"At the rate you're going, I think it's safe to assume it won't take too long before you mastered all of madame Hufflepuff's recipe! Why, you've already started creating your own, no?" Lacus cheerfully asked in the corner as she tended to the oven, baking bread. This is their homework for this morning's breakfast: Stone grilled fish stuffed with leek and onions, with a side of French croissant. It's just the three of them in the kitchen. Her sister was forced to return back to the barracks by order of Cornelia. She was only given a few days leave after all.

"For the record, I merely adjusted some of her recipes." If nothing else, Madame Helga used a LOT of wine in her menu. "…but my own restaurant huh… That is… actually a good food for thought."

"What kind of restaurant do you have in mind, master Noir?" Hugo and Lacus were genuinely curious.

"Definitely not a fine dining restaurant, that's for sure." Noir flatly stated. "…I'm thinking… a restaurant for the masses. I guess? I want to make… a B-Grade gourmet restaurant… or no… maybe… Like Ramen Shop or something. Uh, noodles. Ramen are noodles."

"Ramen Shop…?" Lacus and Hugo had different image in their heads. Lacus who know a thing or two about Japan culture can just about imagine a ramen bar… but the thought it was owned by Noir, all she can imagine are customers in dunce hats eating their ramen in abject terror as Noir glared in the background… Hugo had no image of what ramen is safe that meatball spaghetti he had some time ago… but he can imagine the commoner's restaurant that Noir wished for. He remembered how his mother was genuinely happy with that kind of restaurant.

"Well, putting my mom's recipes on that restaurant will be difficult, I'm sure." Hugo chuckled.

"…I don't think I'll ever put any of madame Helga's recipes in my menu." Noir tilted his head. "Her food is… not the kind I want to make, after all."

"…eh?" Hugo gawked and glared at Noir. "Pardon me, master Noir… I… if you're not going to put any of it in the menu, why bother learning it at all?"

"…the basics. Many of your mother's dishes require very high level of technical skills to make. So… mastering them would make a very good practice to increase one's cooking skills very rapidly."

"So… I see…"

Noir can easily see Hugo's disappointment on his face. "…you disapprove?"

"I wouldn't dare, master! It's not my place to impose-"

"It would've been a pity, indeed."

"I… what?"

"…there aren't many people on this world who can master your mother's recipes. Apparently I'm one of only two who can. But the other one is crippled. So, she won't do half as good." Lacus shrugged when Noir mentioned her arms. "And as for me… I won't cook much of your mother's recipe… But it's good food. That's why I'm learning so hard to master your mother's recipe. They're good recipes worth cooking. What a pity it would be if it's just got… lost and forgotten."

Hugo sighed. As expected of Master Noir, he deduced his concerns perfectly.

"…I'll find a way."

"Master?"

"I'll find a way. I promise you this: before I can ensure the future of Madame Hufflepuff's recipes, I will never open my own restaurant. No matter how long it takes. Even if it takes me the rest of my life, I'll find a way."

"Master Noir…" Hugo was more than grateful for this.

But then…

STOMP, STOMP, STOMP…

The ground shakes. Noir, Lacus, and Hugo easily recognized this. This is the tremor caused when Madame Helga was absolutely furious. Now, as far as Noir concerned, he had yet made any new attempts of murder by food, Lacus had yet to be confronted by any new crooked money lender, so Hugo surmised his beloved mother is angry about something else.

Hint: this morning Lacus told her about Noir's valuation of the Maison Taj restaurant…

"Two feathers." Helga glared at Noir. "You gave them two feathers!?"

"Food quality wise, it's four. But I question their ability to handle the stress of being Four."

"Oh." Helga grimace was reduced somewhat. When she tasted the food, she did question why it was only two. But she still looks rather angry.

"Something vexes you, madame?"

"YES, something vexes me! This is their official opening day, and I had to wait 3 hours in line! And did they sympathize? No, they blared that LOUD horrid music with that marching band! SO LOUD I can barely hear myself THINK! They won't even let pets into the building! And the smell of curry! It's everywhere!"

"Well, it's an Indian restaurant…" And yeah, apparently for today, they hired a musical band to promote their restaurant and played a chorus of Indian music so loud, even Noir can hear it from here, a few blocks away.

"That's no restaurant, Mr. Judge. That's a funeral house! The funeral for the death of Good Taste and Class in Februarius!"

"…well… it's crowded, isn't it? People seem to like it."

"Funny thing is, half of the customers today are non-humans."

"That's a problem?"

"YES, IT'S A PROBLEM! He's poaching a lot of our regulars! And today was supposed to be peak day, but HOW did it become so popular with the Beastmans and Elves!? ELVES! Those tree huggers never ate anything with no green in it, and they all LINED up for that brown muck!" There's another reason why Madame Helga was upset. Today was the final day of the Wizard Convention. This is supposed to be their busiest day, come lunch time. Yet… they get only half of their usual number of customers. The other half is currently sweating happily in Maison Taj. But, to be fair, they're no longer pressed for money, so this is hardly as serious an issue as before…

"Well… isn't that what business is all about? They're making something they like, so they came. What do you want me to do about it?" By all accounts the restaurant was perfectly legal in every way, so Noir was pretty helpless.

"Only some silence from you for today! I'm going into the kitchen! I need to think of some new menu to show to that goody veggie curry do gooders!"

Noir was probably quite confused out of his mind at this point, because his next comment was rather dumb. "And the fish…?" Later he questioned his sanity on why he asked that question.

Helga glanced at the fireplace, and simply took a sniff of the fish being cooked within: "That is good. Don't burn the skin, now SHUT UP!"

And the angry matron stomped into the kitchen and slammed the door shut behind her. Noir was stunned in silence. "What have I done?"

Hugo merely laughed heartily. "Nothing, Master Noir. Nothing. You've simply saw the full revival of my mother as a chef. You noticed that she was angry about a lot of things… but not their food, yes? That was just her being competitive. That just means that while she disagrees with the food, she at least acknowledged it's good food. Maybe even better than hers."

"WHAT!?" Helga howled behind closed door.

"NOTHINGFORGETISAIDTHAT!" Hugo clasped his mouth shut.

Lacus chuckled sweetly in the background. Noir sighed in relief. "On another topic… it should be today." With this being the final day of the convention, a particular announcement should've been revealed in front hundreds and thousands of shocked wizards and witches by now. "I hope it all goes well."

"C.C. didn't come barging in as she often would." Lacus smiled. "So… I guess it went as well as you can hope?"

"You don't mean, she's not lazing away eating pizza again?"

"She's maybe weird that way, but she can be responsible when she wants to." Lacus chuckled. "Besides, you outranked her now. She had to do as you've told, no? Otherwise, she'll get fired, and then there won't be anyone who will foot her Pizza bills." When Ray Yuki came to pick up Athrun, he also used that chance to officially demote C.C. to the rank of senior Field Judge. She doesn't mind, but it effectively making her Noir's subordinate.

"…so that's her primary motivation on joining the circle?" That answered a lot of questions. Lord help them.

So all in all, it is a quiet morning. But… such quiet times masked… a brewing storm. And this was vindicated when Noir noticed a familiar face… "Lady Sakuya?"

The Lady of the Sylphan Elf just appeared right at their backyard, seemingly out of thin air. Godric was right behind her, being her escort. Their hooded cloak insinuate they wish not to be seen coming here.

"What are you doing here, milady? Shouldn't you be somewhere else?"

"I have my best right hand woman upholding my end of the bargain as we speak. I need you now, to uphold yours. You once promised me a favor?"

Noir blinked, noting the grimness of her tone. "So soon already?"

"The suddenness is not my choice. My carriage awaits."

"…understood. Just… let me doggy bag my fish."

Sakuya led Noir, Lacus and Hugo to join her in her pumpkin carriage, pulled by a pack of rabbits as big as a full grown man. As soon as they boarded, the new occupants were jerked off their seats when the rabbits yanked and pulled the carriage at incredible speed. As they zoomed their way across the city, Noir noticed no one bat an eye to this unusual vehicle. Not even the wildlife was affected when they zoomed very near them. "You… turned this vehicle invisible… so… a modicum of secrecy is needed."

"As expected, you're very quick. I'm asking you to deal with… a rather sensitive issue. I've been made aware of what Judges really do, and… I know it has nothing to do with food." Sakuya chuckled, but then she continued: "This is something… that I think is quite right up your alley. But… please understand I'm taking great pains to bring you, a human, into this."

"My silence is already part of the whole package deal. But… it would help me considerably if you can at least tell me who my 'client' will be."

"Illustrious, in the extreme. But… she has no love for humans. Her race and the humans had too much bad blood in their history."

"Okay…" Around that time, the passenger also began to notice something else: they've left the city behind and they're climbing up a mountain. At incredible speed too. It wasn't long before they arrived at the destination and the carriage stops. For the record, they're near the top of the mountain. Sakuya gently waved her hand; a thick coat made of leaves and flowers appeared in the passengers hands. When they put it on, the cold weather on the mountain no longer bothered them. As they descended from the carriage, a few people are already there. Leading them, was Balthazar Slytherin, with his son and a group of other wizards in tow. They're encircling something…

"What are you doing here?" Salazar gawked as soon as he saw Noir.

"I was invited."

"Do you now?" Balthazar growled. "I thought I told you to act your age."

"I tried. Some people don't. Clearly, even in this 'perfect' city of yours, I still can't afford to."

Balthazar and Salazar winced at how deep his sarcasm bites. Everybody in the Warden office already knows about the truth of the food fight, and they clearly can see which one is more mature in that case. And it's also a fact that their inability to stop it had forced the Judge to shed no small amount of blood in their supposedly peaceful city. The humiliated wardens have no word, or right, to rebuke his barely concealed chastisement.

"Now, get out of the way please."

Balthazar made a gesture and the wizards parted ways… revealing the body.

Noir's eyes widened.

It's… a horse… a beautiful white horse… its skin was unblemished, pure white… or rather it used to be… if not for this… pool of silver blood pouring out of its many, many terrible wounds… especially her head… half of it was smashed. It made everyone who looked at it… sad. Something that should not be scarred had been desecrated. "…what is this… travesty, Lady Sakuya?"

"…aptly put. That, My Lord Judge… is a Unicorn. A slain Unicorn."

Lacus clasped her mouth in horror, Hugo can feel his grip on his hammer tightened, even Godric's face grew redder in anger. Noir remained calm, and then slowly, but sure, he approached the poor creature… until suddenly, he was yanked back by Godric. He would later thanked the man, because moments later, he saw a jet black horse with two horns came charging, impaling the spot where his lungs would've been.

"Bicorns!? Then…" Lacus gasped.

Two Bicorns immediately appeared and neighed viciously, forcing the wizards into full retreat. They angrily swiped their twin horns, slashing and stabbing the onlookers away in a threatening manner. One in particular, was glaring angrily at Noir, the one it didn't managed to gore. Before the shock of these newcomers had abated, everyone can hear a beautiful clarion of a horse neigh heralding the flapping of wings. When they look up, everyone held their breath…

Another horse descends, this time from the sky. Even from afar, she was still a magnificently beautiful horse, far more beautiful than the one laying dead on the ground. Her whole body is colored in purple, with a mane of dark night sky, matching the pinions of her wing. The mighty wings on her shoulders flapped gracefully, its feathers looked ethereal with glimmers of stars sprinkled across its dark night color. A golden horn proudly jutted out of her forehead. A Winged Unicorn, an Alicorn. She landed gracefully right inbetween the two bicorns. And while the jet black horses are noticeably bigger than her, they backed away and bowed their heads to her in reverence.

"What is this treachery!?"Her voice, soothing and beautiful, was nonetheless clearly displeased. It came out from her unmoving snout and boomed straight into their minds. "I believe the covenant was quite clear. None of you humans will lay hand on my kin while flesh still attached to her bones!"

"We are not!" Salazar hastily replied. "We still honor the covenant! It was this boy who tried to touch it!"

The Alicorn quickly looked at Noir with hostility. But then Sakuya quickly stand in his defense. "Sakuya? What is the meaning of this?"

"Peace, my friend. Peace. It was I who brought him here. And he knows not of the covenant. Please… stay your hostility, your majesty. He means no harm."

"You brought a human here? A boy!? A Muggle no less?"

"Yes. But he's not just any muggle boy, he's a Judge. The Lawkeeper of Man. THE Lawkeeper."

"…the one the Treants spoke of?"The Alicorn snorted. For someone the Treants had held in such high regard, she was expecting someone older… and bigger. "…why did you bring him here?"

"I believe he can help."

"We don't need their help!"

"We don't need their help in the last six either? Now is not the time to be stubborn, my friend."

"6!?" Salazar blurted. "You only said there are 3-"

Balthazar quickly slapped his son's head to shut up.

"He doesn't know our ways?"

"He doesn't. And that is to his advantage. It gave him insight. He can see things in ways we cannot. Let him do what he needs to do. You'll lose nothing either way."

The Alicorn Princess looked at the masked boy… and then she signaled the Bicorns, and they reluctantly part ways. Noir nodded and so he made his way towards the body – but… "Don't touch the blood." Sakuya whispered.

"Is it toxic?" Noir halted at that.

"…in a way. Expect a terrible end if it enters your system."

"…in that case… we'll treat this as a Class-S contraband situation." Noir turned to the wizards: "Your attention: Class-S Contraband, the Highest Class of dangerous material. I need you guys to set up an isolated chamber. Nothing gets in, nothing gets out, not even a single drop of blood, not even its fumes are allowed to leave this place. Everybody put on hazmat suits at ALL time! And once we're done, we're gonna sterilize the whole lot! Burn it all down! NOW MOVE IT! THIS CRIME SCENE ISN'T GETTING ANY FRESHER!"

The Wizards and Witches winced and they looked at Balthazar… who glared back at them. "What are you looking at me for, you doddering halfwits? You heard him, NOW MOVE IT!" Now everyone jumped into action.

"One more thing, can someone give me a rundown about Unicorn physiology? The basics would do."

"I have a book!" Lacus giddily raised a book: Unicorn 101 for Dummies.

In 15 minutes, the wizards, under the wary watch of the Bicorns, had completely enclosed the Unicorn body in a magical tent. Everyone working must wear a hazmat suit (AN: imagine a more bulbous form of medieval plague doctors), as instructed. And no one, no one was allowed to so much as to touch a single drop of the Unicorn blood smearing the crime scene. In all that time Noir studiously read the book Lacus gave him… "Unicorn… Unicorn… similar physiology to horse, denser muscle, deceptively faster and stronger, smart enough to reach human level intellect… Unicorn Horn, prized magical ingredients… blood… dangerous in the extreme…" From that book, Noir began to understand why everyone was furious about the murder of a Unicorn. It is by far, the friendliest Magical Creature in the world. Other creatures looked upon humanity with dread, and run, at worst they attack viciously at the mere sight of one. But Unicorns, which are all females, are naturally tame and friendly. They will even innocently get close to a hostile armed human. Of course they are extremely dangerous when provoked… but to kill something so pure… so innocent… that's like killing a baby in a crib. And that is why everyone is furious. Even crimes had taboos.

Standing in the opposite spectrum are Bicorns. Extremely violent, extremely hostile… 9 times out 10 they will kill humans on sight. But that's because of the grim nature of their job. Apart from the fact they are all Males and mating partners of the all female unicorns, they also took responsible of guarding the graveyard of deceased Unicorns, the place where elderly unicorn went for their final rest… a treasure horde for grave robbers. "Kinda like Elephant Graveyard…" Any grave robbers will be trampled or gored without mercy. A covenant however, exists between humans and unicorns. They're allowed to take a portion of the Unicorn horns, provided they are already dead and the flesh had rotted away, that is… when they are all but bones. That's why the Bicorn tried to kill him, he thought he was breaking the rule. "…but… this situation will demand it."

"What do you mean?" Lacus asked.

"I need to touch the body if I'm going to examine it." Noir made sure the Alicorn Queen heard him. Already he can sense the bloodlust emanating from the Bicorns. "I need to understand this situation. It's not enough to just see. I'll be in a Hazmat suit."

Soon, Godric dressed Noir in a Hazmat suit that fit his diminutive size and he began entering the isolation chamber. Just before he went in, once again Sakuya and the Alicorn Queen barred him with cautionary words. "Do NOT touch the blood directly. Understand?"

"My Bicorns will be in there with you. If they sense for an instant that you are false-"

"Kill me. Understood." After that firm answer, the two let the Judge into the room, where the two less than friendly bicorns awaited.

Noir spent quite a while in that isolated room. The bicorns were awfully quiet too. Which is a good sign: if he had done anything untoward, they would throw a fuss… and a lot of red blood would smear the inside of that tent. But… after a while, the door of the Chamber was finally opened again. But Noir didn't immediately walk out; his hazmat suit was drenched in silver blood of the Unicorn. "Get this thing off me! And we're done here! Gather all the Hazmat suits! We're gonna burn it all!"

"But we're not in there?"

"The blood had fumes, don't they?"

Class-S Contraband item: NOT EVEN THE FUMES are allowed to leave the scene. And so, the wizards took off their hazmat suits and throw it into the isolation tent. Once the Bicorns walked out of there, Noir set the whole thing ablaze. They waited until the fire consumed the very last bit of the tent, leaving the Unicorn body completely unscathed for the Bicorns to care for.

"You found what you're looking for?"

"Yes." Noir replied. "Some answers… and a lot more questions. Questions that need answers. And this book is useful, but it's no help anymore." The Unicorn for Dummies was for dummies. And now he needed some expert answers.

"Then let's do it somewhere quiet and private." Sakuya snapped her finger and the pumpkin carriage suddenly transformed as it grew larger and larger. The wheel disappeared and soon, the pumpkin itself grew to the size of a small house.

A private meeting was arranged inside the newly erected pumpkin cabin, with only limited participant: Noir, Lacus, Hugo, Godric, Salazar, Balthazar, Sakuya… and by Noir's request, the Alicorn Queen.

"What will be said here will not leave this room, we swear it under the law of the Deep Magic." Noir started. Everyone nodded and swore the same. "Now… let's get this started right away. That was a murder. Plain and simple. But… there's a lot of weird things about this picture."

"Weird, how?"

Noir looked straight at the Alicorn Queen: "Your grace… all due respect… you need to be honest with me. What did Unicorn blood do? Exactly? That poor creature lost a pint of her blood. And I don't mean roughly, I mean a pint. Exactly a pint. If it's toxic… why would anyone… want Unicorn blood?"

"…" The Unicorn Queen held her silence… but then Sakuya gently patted her mane.

"Twilight… he can help you… but you need to help him." She said something in her language.

The Queen finally sighed… and nodded in exasperation."…we kept this secret… for a long time… we would like it to stay that way."

"Understood."

"Unicorn Blood is not poison. Just the opposite. It is life. An Elixir of Life. Any who imbibe Unicorn Blood will be granted life. Even if you are one step away from death, our blood will keep you."The Queen finally came clean. "But it is also a cursed life. The new life you gained from the slaying of something so pure will not last. You need to imbibe more and more Unicorn Blood to keep it. Until eventually, life itself will become so unbearable, and most would rather die than to live like so."

Everyone easily understood now why the Queen kept it a secret. If anyone knew about this… and the Unicorns are endangered enough as is…

"So that's why you were wary about the blood." Noir sighed in regret. "…which is kinda funny because the perpetrator didn't give a damn about the blood."

Everyone glared at Noir at that note. He started the conversation implying the blood was important now he went back on his words?

"They don't… care?" Hugo choked. "How could they not care?"

"Let me finish: the Unicorn had a pint of her blood extracted out of her… but it was easy to see where it went: they threw it around. Smeared it allover the place to make the scene as bloody as possible-"

SLAM!

The Unicorn Queen just smashed her golden hoof on the floor in rage, and the ground shattered. Her mane flared as her gentle eyes were filled to the brim with bloodlust. Even her light purple skin turned dark. "They murdered… my kind… and then desecrated her body… what kind of creature would do such a thing?"

"Humans." Noir answered without even raising a tone, to the horror of everyone present. "The only creature I knew who would kill in so brutal a fashion but still had enough cunning to prepare an elaborate scene: humans. That Unicorn was murdered by humans."

"But you're also human!?"

"Yes. Which is why I understand very well just how disgusting we can be." Noir's eyes glint coldly. Not a hint of warmth of friendliness everyone had grown accustomed to. This is not Februarius Noir, this is Aprillus Noir. The shadowy hunter that is the terror of the underworld of the most corrupt city of the Empire. "That being said… human is also a creature of need. Disgusting as it is… this is not a fun killing."

The Queen looked at Noir.

"I'm sorry I have to ask you about the blood, but I need to understand this picture. The perpetrator used that pint of blood to disguise the murder… you were all so concerned about the blood, the perpetrator knows this too… which is why they tried to disguise their murder as an attempt on ex-sanguinate the poor girl. To mislead us. They went after something else." Noir pointed at his forehead… referring to that thing on a Unicorn's forehead. "They want the Horn."

"Unicorn Horn!?" Salazar blurted. "That's even more outlandish than your first theory. Unicorn Horn is sold publically in the market! Why would anyone kill a Unicorn and then… bloodied the poor thing for something they can just buy off the store!?"

"Exactly the question, thank you Master Slytherin." Noir nodded, stunning Salazar in silence. "Let me tell you what I see in that tent. There are signs of restraints on the Unicorn's legs. And then, on her head… I saw precise incisions – which they try to disguise by bashing her face apart. The horn wasn't torn violently off her head, it was surgically removed. And they take pains to make sure the Unicorn was alive during the extraction. I know now about the covenant. And I also knew the fearsomeness of Unicorns, despite their innocent nature. Flawlessly removing a horn from a living, trashing, Unicorn is not something just anyone can do. This is not just simple murder, this is a well coordinated operation performed by professional killers and poachers. And they did it 6 times? The cost far surpassed the market price of an intact unicorn horn… so… as Lord Slytherin Jr. had so eloquently put: why would anyone do this… for something they can just buy off the shelf. That is my question."

Silence in the room. They all looked uneasily at the table, but they also glanced quietly at the only one who can answer that question.

The Alicorn Queen looked at this child human… judging him very closely… she glanced at Sakuya one more time, and she gave her an encouraging look. "I trust you're not bluffing me again this time?"

"I know the blood was important somehow." Noir nodded apologetically. "I just didn't think it was THAT important."

The Queen nodded. As Sakuya had said: the child did not know their ways. "…if there's something different about this Horn, little one… is because… as you say… the Unicorn was alive when they extracted the horn."

"Is there any difference?"

"A world of difference. The Horns you see in the market are horns harvested from deceased Unicorns. The Covenant clearly stipulates the types and amount humans can harvest at any given time. Unicorn Horns are among the most commonly used ingredients in magic practices. Wand making. Potion. Ritual. We understand its importance to the world of witchcraft and wizardry, that is why we allowed the harvesting – but only on our deceased ones in their Graveyard. Unicorn horn possessed incredible magical properties, even when it was harvested from our bleached bones. However… a living unicorn horn is even more potent. In fact, allow me to give you a demonstration."The Queen turned to Sakuya. "My friend, you wouldn't happen to have a skellegro potion in your keeping?"

Sakuya raised an eyebrow in a knowing look. "Ooooh… this is going to be painful…"

"I need someone to get maimed badly to near death? Any volunteers? I promise on my honor, that volunteer will walk out of the experience unharmed."

Only two hands rose up. Noir and Godric.

Noir looked at Godric. "I need to understand this. Why do you volunteer?"

"Need I remind you, master Noir, you just recovered? Volunteering to be maimed by a Unicorn would be very ill advised."

"Pain's an old friend."

A now officially bewildered Alicorn Queen nevertheless chose Godric. "He's an adult, and I'm still quite peeved at you, Master Noir. I might accidentally smash you to paste."So she said… before she raised her hooves and smashed Godric's chest with a carefully controlled force. The man was thrown allover the room. Lacus winced as her ears told her exactly just how many of his bones are broken and how many are shattered to pieces.

The half dead Godric gape and gawked in sheer absolute pain… all his limbs are twisted the wrong way, some of the bones jutted out of his clothes… It hurts just looking at him. "Okay, you have your half dead man, now what?"

Sakuya quickly pulled out the Skellegro potion. "This is a Skellegro potion. It is well known to mend and regrow bones back. And it has Unicorn Horn Dust in it. Deceased ones, of course." Sakuya continue explaining as she poured a cup of the sickly smoking green liquid for Godric. He could barely drink it… before he start roaring in pain. Only his jaw was fixed and even that, it's still fractured, Lacus noted. "Normally, for injuries as severe as this… Master Gryffindor has to drink a whole gallon, and then to not sleep for 5 years straight on the account of the bones grow back… VERY, VERY painfully. Assuming he didn't die of insanity after the first night."

"In other words, he's screwed."

"Quite." Then the Alicorn Queen came and thrust out her golden horn. Sakuya gently took a nail filer and grated just a speck of the golden dust from her horn, and then she poured it into a single glass of that smoking potion. The liquid turned its color, from sickly green… to gentle yellow. Sakuya offered it again to Godric… and then…

Within seconds, Godric shot straight back up as all the broken shattered bones in his body fixed themselves anew… When he get back up on his feet, it was as if he had never been injured before…

His amazement aside, Noir quickly understood the implications. "The Living Unicorn Horn dust… amplifies the effect of the magic potion… making it more potent?"

"A hundred times a hundred more potent. In fact… it can be too much." The Queen bowed her head to a recovering Godric. "My apologies for the severity of the injury. But if I don't do at least that much, the overly potent Skellegro will overwhelm you."

"It's okay, milady…" Godric grunted as he tested his new bones… It's amazingly strong! He could get used to this!

"So… you're implying a living Unicorn Horn Dust is too potent to be used for magical practices." Noir shrugged. "Or… is there any spells or magical whatnot that specifically require Living Unicorn Horn Dust?"

"Nay. Elves never used Living Unicron Horn dust. We consider it way too chaotic. Too unreliable! Remember, if a magic fails, the backlash is equivalent to the power of the magic. Imagine a magic boosted a hundred times a hundred. And imagine if it fails! The power boost is not worth the risk."

"Not your spells… I'm asking the humans in this room!"

"You're still insistent that this was done by humans?" Salazar asked.

"Yes. Because the crime scene was sloppy as fuck as far their attempt to throw us off." Noir frowned. "Can I assume the previous five is just as bad or better?"

"The truth is, in the first three we… thought some kind of monster got to them. Turf war is not exactly uncommon." Sakuya explained. "But the next two was… so brutal… we don't see animals can do this. Even one so starved out of its mind."

"In those two, you realized someone is consciously hunting Unicorns. So… you readied escorts, Bicorns. The perpetrators began to notice. They're good… but the ground is shrinking beneath their feet. This was a close call. They didn't have time to cover their tracks as well as the previous ones." Noir sighed. "So… let's examine the facts: a group of highly trained poachers are out there hunting Unicorns. They tried to disguise their murder by making us think they were after its blood. Blood which secretly has the ability to extend life. An information which, while you've tried to keep it a secret, the perpetrator seem well aware of. Their true target however, is a surgical extraction of living Unicorn Horns. An extremely potent magical ingredient. So… …how much would a Living Unicorn Horn sell in a black market? You… wizards and witches had anything of sorts?"

Sakuya bit her lips. "I don't pretend to be the expert but…"

"A living unicorn horn dust would fetch at least… 100,000 galleons… per gram."The Unicorn Queen unexpectedly answered. "An intact horn… 20 million."

"…shelf life?"

"…1 week. No methods of preservation exist."

At that Noir stood up and made ready to leave.

"W… wait, we're done?"

"No. We're just getting started. That body is 2 days old. Shelf Life is only a week? We're running short on time." Noir looked at Sakuya. "You're going to take me to that black market, right now."

"Umm… okay. But… uh…"

"What?" That was when Noir finally realized he was the only one in the room that was raring to go. "Why do I sense so much hesitation?"

"…so none of you ever told the boy about what we call the Black Market in here?" Balthazar rubbed his nose. Hugo and Godric sighed. No, they were too busy being tutored to the inch of their lives in math and physics with a side of chemistry…

"Anoo… Noir-kyun?" Lacus raised her hand. "In here… Black Markets are called… Troll Markets."

"Ok, so?"

"Named such because they used to be Troll's Hoards… their nest. So… it's guarded by Trolls."

"So it's hidden?"

"No. Everybody knows where it is, but it is guarded by Trolls."

"Ok, so?"

"Uhhh…" Lacus sweat dropped.

"So… he doesn't know what Troll is?" Salazar concluded in exasperation.

Noir tilted his head in confusion. Then he finally asked the question he should've asked 5 minutes ago: "What's a Troll?"

Later… in the entrance to Troll Market…

CRUNCH!

Noir saw exactly what trolls are.

30 feet of excess muscle and dumb hate, filled with warts and covered in slabs of rocky hard skin, its trunk like arms wield a tree as club. A club which one out of TWO of them had just used to swat a rhinoceros-like creature the size of a cart to a stain on the ground because the Troll in question mistook it for a cockroach. The head housed a skull so thick it houses an underdeveloped brains the size of a peanut. Said head unfortunately featured two tiny eyes, two big flappy ears, a giant crooked nose, a gaping maw that passed for a mouth, replete with a series of jagged fangs and tusks, each of them is about as tall as Noir.

Everybody knows where the Troll Market is. It's a giant cave on the face of a mountain's base. But the problem isn't about finding it. The problem is getting in… and out.

"As I mentioned before… Troll Markets used to be Troll Hoards. Their nest. Trolls often left the leftovers and refuse of their meals in said hoard. The leftovers often include precious trinkets and riches. Belongings of their unfortunate former owner. Legend has it, one day, the Trolls captured a group of Dwarves. Instead of eating them, they stored them in their hoard, they want to eat them fresh. The Dwarves are resourceful, and the hoards were filled with various trinkets… so the Dwarves used them to escape, by tunneling out of the hoard. But… then… an idea struck. Instead of tunneling out, they expand the hoard into a network of caves… which they used to salvage the precious trinkets found in the Troll Hoards. Over time those caves turned into trading grounds… and before you know it, viola, the Hoard turned into Market. And the Trolls never noticed. They just assume they've already eaten the dwarves, but they still stand guard over the entrance, smashing down whoever tried to get into their hoard." Lacus explained while Noir, Salazar, Godric and Hugo watched as the troll start licking at the stain that was the rhino creature. Balthazar had left and took most of the mages back with him, but he ordered Salazar to stay. Sakuya and the Alicorn Queen also followed Noir's group, and now they stay behind them and watch.

"…so they're like giant club wielding bouncers." Noir nodded. "I see… but it's a market… so… there's gotta be a way in, no?"

"Oh yes. You just have to get past the Trolls."

"Get past the Trolls?" Noir tilted his head. "How do you get past the Trolls?"

"Good question." Salazar snarled.

"Technically speaking there are various ways, if you know how." Sakuya chuckled. "It goes without saying that they're strong, but they're also very resilient to spells, and they're slow. They are not very bright but they are very territorial: they will crush anything that came close. Various races used various methods to get in. Invisibility cloak, tunneling, bribe with food and alcohol, etc2. Some opted to distract them." Noir looked at Sakuya. "That was the easiest method. Then you walk in before they catch up."

"…you can kill them too?" Noir shrugged. "Call in the artillery, blast them to oblivion?"

"They're Trolls, almost impossible to kill. Even if you can somehow blast off the head, they'll regrow it in a matter of minutes." Salazar replied.

"Aa~ah… so they're regenerators. Now we're getting somewhere." Noir snapped his fingers. "Okay. I know what to do."

"What?"

Noir turned to Lacus. "Lacus, I need a lift."

"Okay." While everyone is still confused, Lacus already gave Noir a ride on her broom. Noir asked her to take him high up above the cliff entrance. They flew around a while as Noir is studying the mountain… for something… then they swooped in… Lacus later told them Noir took a pebble, took aim, and throw. And in a series of mathematically calculated unfortunate events: The pebble hit a rock, the rock hit a bigger rock, the bigger rock hit a bunch of bigger rocks, and the bunch of bigger rocks hits the biggest of rocks, and within seconds a fact of life in a rocky mountain occurred: an avalanche of rockslide descended upon the trolls. One of the biggest slabs landed on one of the troll and crushed him outright. The other one, so dumb he was, didn't even realize his friend just got pulverized before he looked up and the second wave of the rockslide crushed his head.

When the two children landed, the two 30 feet monstrosity are now twitching limbs beneath a pile of rocks. "That… went better than I expected…" He was only hoping he'll only get one of them. Getting two with one throw is jackpot.

"Did anyone ever tell you your ideas are disturbingly brutal?" Lacus winced.

"Not to my face, they don't." Noir looked at the twitching Troll limbs. "They're not dead?"

"No. They'll regenerate. They always do. But… with this amount of damage? It'll probably take a few days…"

"Is that right…?" Then he looked back to the audience - who had yet to pick up their jaws. "Anyway, there, I beat the crap out of them. Now that you see what a little math can do, shall we?" He jerked both thumbs to the now unguarded entrance to the Troll market.

And he did that with a pebble. A freakin' pebble. Somebody, anybody… please… don't ever give this kid some real weapon, PLEASE.

Sakuya was the first to recover. And just in time, because Noir is already one foot away from entering the now rock piled cave entrance. "WAIT! One more thing! One more thing! Just One. More. Thing! Lord Noir. Please!" After seeing what the boy can do with a pebble, Sakuya suddenly felt compelled to be respectful, hence the honorific.

"What now?"

"Your smell!" Sakuya spurted in her rush.

"My smell!? What, do I have to take a bath!?"

"No! No, that's not what I meant." Sakuya took a moment to catch her breath. "We need to put you on a disguise to mask your smell. Even with that distortion cloak, you stink of human."

"…your kind really hates humans, don't you?"

"Not really. Many of us LOVE humans." Sakuya quickly added. "A rare delicacy. Especially the little ones."

"…" Contrary to being terrified, Noir seems to be in deep thought… "Okay… so… what should I do?"

"Wait! I got just the thing!" Lacus jumped in excitement. "Something just got sent to me this morning! We can use that!" She yanked Ms. Pink and opened her up. She rummaged inside her for a bit… and then she pulled something really bulky…

Honestly, even Noir almost forgot about that thing.

"Ta-da! Behold the new and improved Bert Suit!"

There are quite a few changes. Still the same color scheme: mostly white with black chest plume. The arm still had blue pinions, and they are as long as before, but the finger feathers are leaner. Less bulky. Also, it sports a black cape with blue undertone behind the head that is also smaller. Everything is not so bulbous and more streamlined and sporty, so to speak. "Okay. I can use that."

And so as Noir put on his new suit, Sakuya watched all this in held breath and barely concealed horror. She knew very well what's hidden under that fluffy plush façade. "Lacus… that's a Titan-bane right?"

"Yes."

"You do realize he just crushed two fully grown Trolls… with a pebble? With a 'bleeping' pebble?" Didn't they just agree to NOT give this kid a weapon!?

"Yes."

That's when Sakuya realized: it's not that Lacus didn't realize what she had created… she just chose to not care. "…All-Father help us…"

"Tee-hee…"

Everyone turned to the Alicorn Queen. "Interesting. VERY interesting. I see now why Sakuya took an interest in you. If this… is the sort of unyielding zeal you will bring to bear against those butchers… then you have my blessings, Lawkeeper." The Queen neighed serenely in a clarion call. The two Bicorns stood ready. "These are my royal Guards. They will aid you in your endeavor until its conclusion. I pray you good fortune in your hunt."

Noir had just finished putting his Bert helmet on. Whoever made it, they've taken the liberty of making the bird face look less ridiculous and angrier to boot. Now he's a bit closer to the Bird of Terror they called him to be. "You can count on me, your majesty."

Sensing the Queen's approval, Sakuya also smiled… albeit uneasily. "If that's the case, then I guess I shall take my leave too. We'll look forward to hear your success. Twilight, you wanna carry me home?"

"Why should I give you a ride?"

"You broke my carriage." That foot stomp from earlier had nailed the transfigured pumpkin on the spot there in the mountain, completely immovable.

Sakuya, with Twilight's reluctant permission, mounted the Alicorn on her back. And with that, the two Queens took to the air, leaving Noir and company behind so that they can do their task unimpeded. Nevertheless… the two Queens can't help but mused:

"Understanding now what we've just unleashed… is it funny that I actually feel sorry for those poor foolish murderers?" Barely seconds after she left, the naturally peaceful Alicorn Queen already had a crisis of conscience.

"…not really, no." So did Sakuya…

00000008 years later0000000

Hugo paused there. And everyone also sighed. The biggest hurdle about Troll market is getting past those Trolls. And in the few days it'll took for the Trolls to recover from the experience, entry into the Market was easier than ever. Between this and the fact there is a worldwide Wizard convention at that time… the Troll Market saw an influx of visitors unprecedented…

…and they all inevitably saw what the Bird of Terror did to those Trolls. Those poor, poor Trolls.

And the fact he did that with a pebble; a friggin pebble… became legend. A boogieman story to terrify misbehaving children: if you misbehave, the Bird of terror will throw a pebble at you… From one terrified listener to the next, the word was spread. Whenever someone, anyone whispered the name Noir the Bird of Terror in fear, they will always cite this story as one of the reasons for that fear. One of many more that will follow.

"That is… very interesting." Rosso was hardly surprised. He's not the only regenerator they've ever faced in a fight. Together with Noir, they've learned about a hundred different ways people had dealt with regenerators. Stabbing his heart with a sword and keep it there was one of the oldest, most often used trick – second only to burn it down with fire. Hell, Athrun had done it once to a regenerator perp, it's no surprise that even some Alliance captains knew them. Never thought the day would come when he was on the receiving end. But he digresses.

The main point here, at least for these people, is Lacus and Noir. Well, mostly Lacus at the moment.

0000000-LACUS-0000000

"You're on your own."

That was Canard's flat toned answer to the stunned twins when they came to the 7th division asking-nay-demanding help regarding a certain Armored Doctor.

For the record, after beating the inviolate sphere for close to an hour and came nowhere close to breaking it, they finally give up and tried asking for help from the 10th division. Alas, they refused on the account they already have their own orders. And this came straight from Rena Imelia herself, so they can't help them.

The way of 10th division squadron is thus: each Sergeant had autonomy over their own squad. They can shape it any way they like… but conversely, when a squad was given an assignment, unless their superior commanding officer (Lieutenant or Captain) say otherwise, involving other squadron in one's assignment is strictly prohibited, such is the army discipline of the 10th. The pride of the elite, is the responsibility to be able to complete whatever assignment tasked to them using their own resources and privileges.

One such privilege entitled to them was the right to 'requisition' Militia. But truth be known, this is not exactly an official rule, but it was a fact when Harlbarton was in command – born out of his kindness to aid the war effort in his way… except this time, he was no longer around. So, they have to ask permission to the lieutenant, seeing the Captain was clearly unavailable.

But the minute they told the lieutenant their assignment involved a certain armored doctor…

The flat toned answer.

"I don't know where you get your fucking assignment from." Canard scoffed at the twins. "But even if what you say is true that our doctor kidnapped the Empress, such a critical situation, I'd imagine they ought to send the whole fucking army. But they send only you? Clearly they don't value the Empress very much, do they?"

"It's a surgical operation. Requires subtlety and precision-"

"Then you should do better without us. We're 7th division: fucking blunt instrument. Uncouth fucks and no subtlety or precision whatsoever." Canard snorted. "Besides, do you have any idea who the fuck you're dealing with?"

"…no?"

"Well, we do. Everyone in the 7th learnt that the fucking hard way." Canard and everyone in the 7th still remembered the devastation that was caused in Prankcraft. They're childish tricks that do no lasting damage… but the fact is: she was able to do all that to everyone without them being able to do anything to stop her… Imagine if her ideas are more… lethal. "There's only one person who can keep up with her… and unfortunately, your fucking bosses, in their infinite fucking wisdom, sent that person to the backside of fucking China. You want a fucking help? Tell your fuck-faced bosses to ask him for a fucking help. Now get the fuck out of here."

And so the door was shut behind their backs, and the twins walked out of the Archangel empty handed.

Normally it annoyed them having to go through such bureaucratic nonsense. They'd rather just… convince some soldiers to follow their lead, but then they were warned. Warned to the inch of their lives: this is NOT the same 7th division anymore. Respect the chain of command or they will join those braziers still heavy with the stench of burnt humans. And in the case of the Takeuchi twins… normally, they have a trump card in Simca, who will easily do whatever they asked, including requisitioning the other Squadrons with ease… except she was kidnapped too. So they're out of options. And men.

"What now, brother?"

Sora frowned… and then smirked as an idea pop in his head. "Well… there's one help we can call…"

00000000000000

"Where are we? What is this, Hikari-darren?"

"This is my Reality marble. Shut-in Heaven. A reclusive private space when… I want to be alone." As a display of the unnatural nature of this space, Hikari's voice was no longer distorted. Her true serene voice flowed smoothly from her unmoving mask, soothing all who hear it. And what a beautiful voice it was. Simca recognized it as the true wonderful voice of the siren within.

"This is… magic? Arcane Magic…" Simca looked at this surreal environment with tired eyes. "…it won't hold them for long."

"Oh, don't worry. This is a mixture of Magic and Jutsu. Even though they're Null Children… it won't be that easy."

"Null Children?" Tien Zi tilted her head. More terms she's unfamiliar with.

"…it's no secret… that the Old Ones… the Oni Clan who served the Gods in the olden age… they despise demons… and all that comes from them." Lacus began explaining. "Arcane Magic was no exception. Even though humans were able to adapt to its power and made it their own, there was a time when the Old Ones actively tried to prevent humanity from falling into its sway. One such path they undertook was genetics."

Already Lacus can see smoke on Tien Zi's poor head. "Uhh… quick and dirty: Gene is the… foundation that makes human, human. The framework of our very existence. Gender, hair color, skin tone… everything was determined by our Genes. Legend has it that the Old Ones possessed such mastery of the medical arts they were able to alter the genetics of living being, changing them into something… different. And that's what they're trying to do with the Null Children." Lacus paused and wait a bit for Tien Zi to nod in understanding, then she continued.

"They deemed Humanity to be… too vulnerable to Magic's influence. So they tried to alter their genes to create a species of humans that are more resistant to it. An antithesis, one that's not only unaffected but also actively repel magic." Lacus chuckled. "Myths didn't tell the extent of their success, but from what I've learned… the first generation of this anti magic human were able to disrupt the conjuring of magic by their very own presence. Spells won't work, their very touch can unravel enchantments, curses bounced off them… Now… that generation have gone extinct… but not before the Old Ones made sure they were spread allover the globe. Their legacy immortalized in the gene pool of all humanity, lying dormant. Every now and then, these dormant genes reawakened. But they are rare. The odds of humans reawakening these ancient traits are over a million to one."

"China has a population of 1.2 billion people…" Simca followed. "A million to one odd still means we can find more than enough recruits to form several squads of Null humans. Maka and the entire Soul Eater squadron was one such example. There's a special unit in it called the Spartoi, composed entirely of Null Children shock troopers. They are… our countermeasures against magical warfare."

"And those two gentlemen who had been chasing us?"

The life that briefly returned to Simca's face was instantly snuffed out into pure terror. One doesn't need to be a doctor to see it. She struggled to get her bearings back, and Lacus kindly allowed her the time. After seconds… she finally mustered enough courage to answer: "The Takeuchi Twins. One of the strongest pair of Null Children we've ever encountered in a decade."

"Pair?" Lacus' eyes widened. "My word… Twins… and BOTH of them are Null humans? Talk about rare. No wonder their Magic Nullification was so strong. Still…" Lacus caressed Simca's flustered face. "That's not the reason you're so terrified of them, was it?"

"…" Simca grasped her shoulders tightly. But try as she might, her body just couldn't stop trembling.

"…alright." Lacus know severe emotional trauma when she sees one. And pushing her will not help. "Take your time."

"He's… my rehabilitation officer." Simca choked the words out. "…Takeuchi Nike Sora, the younger."

"Rehabilitation?" Tien Zi perked.

"There are many ways to recover from drug addiction." Lacus frowned. "I don't remember if someone had found a way to make it pleasant for the patient… but… I'm pretty sure I won't condone terrorizing a patient."

"I know you won't…" Simca laughed nervously. "…but I can't help it… Rena's rehab regime is brutal and unforgiving, just like she was… but Nike… Nike made it worse for me."

"He had a grudge against you?"

"Just the opposite." Simca shivered even more. "He likes me… like… like, really, really likes me. And because of that he took a… an 'extra' special care at me… but… but…"

"Okay, that's enough." Lacus caressed Simca's cheek. "I asked you these questions not to dig up old wounds. I need to understand what we're up against. Quite frankly, I'm more wary of the other twin. The elder one. Who is he?"

"Takeuchi Sora." Simca's shaky tone recovers significantly. She was clearly less afraid of the elder one. But she's still wary. "Nike's the stronger of the twin, but… Sora's more cunning and crafty. He's de facto leader of the two squadrons."

"How cunning?"

"There was… a mission. A mission that went badly for the twins… The entire squad was wiped out. But Sora… he claimed he was injured. He claimed he was wheelchair bound, so instead of blaming him, everyone sympathize. He had this… junior working under him. For a good long while, Sora absconded from active service and he taught the junior everything he knew, he made it seemingly clear to everyone that junior was to be his successor. And for a while, everyone believed that. And then… there was this mission. A retrieval mission no single squad can pull off. And yet Sora feed the boy with lies… making him think he could." Simca bit her lips angrily. "He used that boy to soften up the defenders so that he could finish the mission himself, regaining his… glory. But… I liked that boy."

"…I see. And this… sympathetic character and his twin, why would they try to kill Tien Zi?"

Simca was quite aware which one is trying to protect the Empress and which one is trying to kill her at this point. "The Eunuchs had… by the graces of the Logos, control of several squadrons that act as their personal bodyguard/thug enforcer/assassins. Xingke and Rena tolerate it enough as long as they did not disturb the military chain of command."

"…right."

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"So… you went to the Troll Market? What happened then?"

"We split up." Hugo explained. "Master Noir believed it to be more productive. Sir Godric and I went our separate ways, while Lord Slytherin…"

That was the cue for Salazar to take over the story.

Salazar's Story:

Balthazar Slytherin and Ray Yuki didn't get along.

Everybody in Februarius, nay, the whole empire knows that. But Salazar knew better. He knew him before he was the Knightmaster. He knew him when he was but a newbie youngster who appeared in front of his family's estate, seeking knowledge in the magical arts from one of the greatest wizard of the age. His esteemed father, Balthazar the Grim. As his namesake implies, he's a mirthless person, tough both to himself, and to his apprentices, including his son. Especially his son.

Many would kill to be his father's apprentice. Many brought tributes and gifts to appease the Master, that he may grant their children the honor to be his student. The fools. For his part, whilst everyone knows he was well off, Ray came before his father with nothing.

"I'm here to learn as much as I can of the greatest magical arts of the land. Not to buy some trinkets." That's what he said to his father.

Balthazar Slytherin, who never smiled even once to his own wife, grinned that day.

For 5 years Salazar studied together with the boy. He watched him fumble, scoffed at his lack of understanding in the exquisite art of magic… and then he was rendered speechless when he quickly surpassed him in every aspect of the magical arts by the fourth year. Around that time, Ray Yuki was no longer his father's apprentice… he's probably the closest thing his father ever had to an equal. Not in magic certainly, but in stature.

And then, the fifth year… the fallout. No one was quite sure what caused it. Some say it was because Ray's ideal of magical mastery stood in opposite spectrum of his Father's. Others say Ray was upset because his Father remained tight lipped regarding certain magical secrets. Others even say Ray stole something from his father. Something he never gave back. No one was quite sure. Neither was inclined to say a word about it… In fact… neither was inclined to say a single word to each other, decades hence.

And now… this. Ray Yuki suddenly just… shoved this half dead injured muggle kid into their backyard and claimed he had more authority than any child had any business in having. The audacity of it all…

But against all odds, just before Balthazar took the other Wardens back to HQ, he gave him an order: "Salazar, you stay with the Judge. Follow through on this operation until its conclusion, you and Godric. Judge Noir, I'm assigning them both under your command."

"WHAT?" Salazar roared in protest, but his father was absolute.

"You heard me."

Later, in front of the now open wide Troll Market…

After Noir put on his disguise, the others also put on their own cover. Godric used a partial transfiguration on himself and turn his upper head into that of a lion, making him a lion beastman. For Hugo, Godric helped gave him a bear ears and snout, and Salazar turned his ears to elven ears. Lacus happily transformed herself with white bunny ears, she even went so far as to give herself a fluffy tail and red nose for good measure. (AN: think a One Piece rabbit mink).

"Ara! Noir-kyuun! Look! Look!" She showcased her playing her rabbit ears to everyone… She looked incredibly cute, all who looked at her were sorely tempted to pat those fluffy ears or pull that tail.

"Uh-huh. Okay. Let's go, clock's ticking."

All except a certain workaholic bird of terror.

And so, a giant bird, followed by a sulking rabbit girl, further accompanied by a lion beastman, a bear man, and an elf… and don't forget the two stern Bicorns, all walked into a Troll Hoard. A perfectly ordinary sight in an ordinarily weird continent.

In the cave, the first that assaulted everyone was the smell. Everyone almost ceremoniously closed their nose. "What is that God Awful smell?"

"Troll waste heap. It's a Troll Hoard. What do you expect?"

"I thought we're going into a Troll Market?"

"This is just the entrance, and it's still a Troll's nest. How do you think those Dwarves kept the Trolls out of the market? Dwarven doors are invisible when closed. We need to find it."

"Well, don't worry, we have days to find the door!"

"Invisible?" Noir groaned amidst the smell. "You call THAT invisible?"

With Noir's eye for detail, he accurately pointed a finger at where the door lay in less than a second. As if acknowledging someone had seen them, rune markings appeared on the door as they lit up.

"That's Elvish… It reads: 'Whomsoever found this door speak the word of merchants and the way will open.'" Salazar read it. "Well that's easy. It's a riddle. The word for merchant in Elvish is… vaktele!"

The door didn't open. "Maybe you didn't say it right?" Hugo asked.

"You're welcome to try if you think your elvish is better than mine!"

"Wait." Noir raised a hand. He cleared his throat a bit and then spoke up, mimicking Salazar's accent: "Vaktele!"

And just like that the door opened up. Everyone blinked curiously, Noir merely shrugged. "If I learn anything about this place, is that everything can be quite literal. It says: 'Whomsoeverfound this door speak the word…' It only works if the one who first found the door speak it." He then turned to the Bicorns: "Am I correct in thinking that the market is not exactly a safe place for you Bicorns?"

"If you want us to go in there, we go."The Bicorn readily answered.

"Is there any other entrance besides this one?"

"No. So far as we know, this is the only entrance passable for humans."Godric replied.

"In that case… I'd rather you two stay here. If things get ugly in there, we may need someone to watch the door: to escape or catch any runners."

The Bicorns nodded firmly. And everyone, except the Judge, gaped. They've never heard Bicorns would obey humans so easily… even if they were on loan to him by the Alicorn Queen…

0000000

"Welcome to the Troll Market."

Apart from its unusual crowd, it is a market. For something built inside a mountain this place is surprisingly bright. People talking and yelling in various languages. Various smells filled the air. The closed corridors and halls were filled with shady stands and shops that lined a dirty street. Their owners prefer to remain in the darkest part of the shade, while their wares of dubious nature are in full display. The minute they walked through the door, they were immediately swarmed by… all kinds of people. And Noir thought he had seen all kinds of unimaginable creature… this place dialled that variety to eleven. All kinds of things fly, crawl, walk, slither, and even modes of movement he couldn't fathom is moving allover the place… All kinds of creature of various shapes and sizes bursting everywhere… from creatures that are now familiar to him… to creatures he just couldn't make heads or tails of… assuming they have heads.

The customers in this place are incredibly varied, the goods sold here, even more so: formalin jar filled with still twitching eyeballs, dried severed hands – many are still twitching, a barrel filled with still beating hearts, mushrooms with salivating maw and serrated teeth, questionable stuff are being cooked in boiling pots, and so on and so forth. One thing in common: none of them looked like stuff that is legally acquired.

But one thing for certain: they blend right in. No one bats an eye at this giant bird with exaggerated proportions with his funny entourage of mismatched creatures.

"Well, this certainly looks the part for a Black Market." Noir tilted his head. Definitely the place one go to find things that weren't supposed to be sold. "Spread out. We'll cover more ground that way." And that's when Noir unexpectedly asked: "Lord Slytherin, sir? May I trouble you to accompany us?"

Salazar jumped in shock hearing the words. "You want ME to come with you?"

"Yes. I need to know more of this market. And you had a broad knowledge regarding this place and of the magic society in general. Not to mention your mastery in magical language. Something I'm still quite ignorant of. I could use your expertise."

Salazar blinked, completely not expecting the Judge would value his skills. His friend Godric merely beamed with pride and slapped his back. "Ha! Master Noir truly has an eye for talent!"

"What are we looking for?" Salazar asked.

"Anything that is even remotely related to our quarry." But as he looked at the rather blank stare of the audience, Noir was soberly reminded he's not talking to his best friend and partner of equal intelligence… he's dealing with newbies, the lot of them. "…remember our quarry. We're looking for a living unicorn horn. An illegal item. It's an item that cannot be sold in the open world – lest attracting unwanted, mayhap hostile, attentions. Which is another way of saying, there's no way they'll just gonna blare out in the public: Hello, we have a living unicorn horn for sale here~! Any takers…?... or am I wrong?" Even now Noir still dread the times his common sense doesn't work in this place.

"No. No, you're not wrong on this one." Lacus chuckled. "Lacking we are in common sense, screaming such a thing is a surefire way to earn open hostility of everyone present. Killing Unicorns equals killing baby in the crib. Your words."

"Well okay… which means, we need to look into the shadiest part of the market. One so shady, no sane person would normally go there, unless they absolutely had to. You're all armed?"

Godric brandished his silver sword, Hugo hefted his warhammer, Salazar checked his wand just to be sure.

"Good. Chances are, there WILL be trouble. If you cannot find the actual item, you can also begin asking questions about things related to the said item. For example, I've mentioned this before: the unicorn horn extraction is no easy process. And it was done expertly, so we're looking for a skilled vet surgeon with dubious morals. I don't know about hunting them though." If Unicorns are really that tame, perhaps there's no need for specialized hunting skills? "Look in shops… auction house. If this is a black market, there's gotta be an auction house or two. And then underground arena. Prize for victor, of sorts."

"I know a few auction houses." Hugo winced when he felt Noir looked at him. "I went there several times to buy some rare spices mom wants."

"…you know any auction houses Madame Helga told you not to go?"

"…Yes?"

"Then you also go there."

Hugo paled.

"I'll go to the arena then." Godric quickly followed. "I'm a regular. My father had me fought some real opponent in the rings. For training."

"In that case, Salazar and I will check the shops around here."

"And me?" Lacus raised her hand.

"You?" Noir sighed. "You kidding me? You have the most important job of all." And before Lacus can guess, Noir had plucked her up and placed her on his shoulder. He's big and strong enough to do that now. "You're a Clyne. Your ears can hear the sound of a needle falling in a coal mine, surely you can monitor a market and listen to any mention of our quarry?"

Lacus eyes widened. "This place is very noisy! It might… overwhelm me…!"

"…so much so that you can't even do anything else. I know. Why do you think you have two escorts and I'm putting you on my shoulder?"

Salazar nodded. So that's why this group is bigger than the rest. They have to protect the one with the best chance to catch the perp. And thus, while Godric and Hugo went their separate ways, Salazar stayed with Noir and Lacus. Lacus closed her eyes and happily purred as she rested her head on Noir's obviously bigger doll head. But she's hardly idle. The other two knew she must be straining right now. Her ears, her bunny ears, are twitching non-stop, she's hearing EVERYTHING. Every chatter, every whisper, even sounds so minute they might just as well didn't happen… she's hearing them all like it was booming right next to her. Salazar couldn't even imagine what that feels like…

"How did it go, Princess?" Noir asked after a few seconds of silence.

"…there are about… two thousand or so voices in this market, chattering in all kinds of language…" Lacus frowned. "Not a single one of them are saying anything about any Unicorn."

"Why can't you count that good in tests?" Lacus purred a chuckle and rested her head on Noir's bulbous head again. God she missed this softness… "Keep checking in 5 minute intervals. Report back to me immediately of any changes."

"Righto."

"Hmmm…" Salazar looked down… and saw a little snake slithering. And then he starts saying something… like a series of hissings… it formed sentences… some form of language… and the snake, it listened to him. It waited and listened… and once he's done, it slithered away.

"Parseltongue. The language of Snakes."

"Yes." Salazar wasn't so surprised anymore that the Judge know his family's bloodline limit.

"What did you tell that snake?"

"I told it to spread the word to its kin. Search places no one can look. Every crevice, every nook and cranny too small for humans to get through."

"Um. Good." Noir nodded. "Well… everybody's looking. Let's get started."

"Where should we start looking?"

"…Are those hotels?" Noir pointed at a large building that looked distinctly high class in this setting. It stuck out in contrast with the slumlike market background.

"Why… yes. Leaving the Troll Market can be as hard as getting in. People can be trapped in here for weeks."

"Hence the hotel business… but they can be used as something else. They can be hideouts."

"Hideouts?"

"Remember what happened to that unicorn? The incisions made on her head are precise and delicate. That's no work of an amateur vet."

"I… don't understand."

"Given the ugly reputation that comes with the act, people who can provide such services are people who would rather hide in places that are hard to find. A hotel in a difficult to access black market? That does sound like a good place to start." Lacus and Salazar nodded as Noir explained. "We're going to check every hotel in this market. How many are there?"

"8." Lacus answered easily.

"Again, why can't you count that good in test!?"

"But how are we going to check them all? These are hotels for people who came to this place, the one place respectable people don't want to be seen coming! They will excel in secrecy! It's not like we can… knock at the front door and say: hello, we would like to see your guest book!"

"No. And you're not wrong. These hotels would cater to the need of not wanting to be found… but we are looking for them, that's no lie. So we will disguise our intent… but… we will not be coming there as a seeker. Did you forget what I was known for in Gateway city? I'm pretty sure my reputation had preceded me at this point."

And to Salazar's bewilderment… it really went by like clockwork.

Noir need only to bring out his name… and the doors to these very exclusive hotels opened wide. Everyone was eager to please the famous food critic that can bring down the stars!

But even Salazar didn't think this would be enough for the hotels to open up… but then…

"A thousand apologies, great master Noir. I do want to please you… but asking to see our guest book…?"

"I had no intention on seeing the actual people… I just need to know their names. And their species. And I'll tell you why: different food affects different people differently. Take me for example: I can't take in alcohol. Just the other day I learned that Sylphan Elves can't eat meat. If this hotel is to provide first class services to all its clients, it had to be able to adapt! If you want my silence, my colleague and I are prepared to take the oath of silence on deep magic, right now."

"You can tell that much just by looking at their names?"

"Who do you think you're talking to?"

"…I'll… talk to the manager."

5 minutes later, the manager himself came and displayed the guest book to their honored guests… with a caveat that he put them under strict watch as they go through them.

"Alright. Now it's your turn, Master Slytherin. I need your help."

"Yes?"

"I want you to pick out names that are obviously non human. Elves, dwarves, whatever else."

"What good will that do?"

"So that I can sort out names that are clearly human. We're looking for humans after all."

"Okay… okay…"

A few minutes, and Salazar had provided Noir with a rough guideline to the naming system of different races. This helped Noir sorted out human names out of the list.

"Is there a problem, sir?"

"No. Just seeing a lot of… Dwarves." Noir frowned. "These are Dwarves?" He looked at Lacus for confirmation and she just nodded.

"Indeed sir, we have a lot of dwarves here."

"I understand it their diet is meat mostly?"

"So much so it put our kitchen under enormous strain!"

"Yes, that sounds very healthy." Noir grunted. "Never crossed your mind to add vegetables and fruits to their diet?"

"We've tried to do that, and they've thrown axes at our waiters in response!" The manager followed. "Honorable sir, in all honesty, the problem is not in serving the dwarves… rather, the often suddenness of their visit…"

"…and they often got roaring ass drunk, yes? I mean… brandy in the morning? That would explain the axe throwing."

"Truly."

"…okay… then for the moment, you can change your ordering system into one you can make via reservation system. Aprillus restaurants do this from time to time. Certain menus can only be ordered via reservation system. Certain amount of food can only be readied when you ordered them a certain days ahead. Also, from what I've noticed: the Dwarves may not like green food, but they do eat fruits and bread, and cheeses too… Change the bread. You're using the soft white munchies… turn it into Whole Wheat grain bread, that will help break down alcohol. It's harder, but they'll get their fiber – and with their jaw strength it wouldn't matter. More fruit too: banana, berries… Make it into part of the package, they'll devour everything in sight. And once they're slightly sober… replace the coffee with tea. Lots and lots of tea. That should break down the oil and help with indigestion and hangovers."

"That… That might work! We'll do so at once! Thank you! Thank you, milord!" The manager was so happy, he repeatedly bowed and kissed Noir's hands before he and the waiter rushed off immediately, leaving their guests unattended. Salazar took the chance and start writing something on paper.

"What are you doing?"

"Writing the names!"

"Put that pen away! We promised them secrecy, and secrecy we will give!"

"B… But there are so many names, how are we going to analyze them all?"

"Just memorize them all! We'll review them later!"

"Me… Memorize!?"

"I already did." Noir shrugged, Salazar felt like he just heard something truly unfathomable. "I suggest you get your snakes. Tell them to follow that manager. He's gonna send a runner to the grocery store any time soon. I just gave them a lot of ideas, ideas using things this hotel didn't have yet. They're gonna send a runner to their favorite suppliers. Find out who those suppliers are."

"…yes. Right away!" Salazar was about to jump to it… but then… "Why should we do this?"

"Do it now. I'll explain why later." Noir glared to stress the urgency, and the somewhat unnerved Salazar had no choice but to do as he was told. "We have other hotels to visit. Now let's go."

'I doubt it will work…' such was Salazar's skepticism… but against all odds, it's a pattern that repeats over and over in the other hotels. They welcomed them, they provide service, he convinced them to show him something they should not give, but they give it anyway… and in return he gave them… genuinely good advices:

"Sylphan Elves can't handle meat? You can try replacing the beef in the steak menu with tofu. Use vegetable oil. Stir fry it, season it with soy bean sauce… it'll give them taste of meat, but not meat."

"Okay… so… You have centaur guests… I noticed these people can't handle dairy products… you can try change the milk from cow milk to goat milk… or better yet, soy milk."

"You… might wanna remove these desserts from the menu. You serve a lot of beastman. Feline and canine types can't tolerate chocolate!"

And then, on Hotel no 5…

Noir wisely decided to slow down. In part, he claimed he needed… some time… to process the hundreds of names he had memorized from the guests lists of the previous hotels. Lacus had been scanning the entire market, listening to thousands of voices for hours until her head began to spin… Salazar's snakes had reached far and wide… no Unicorn horn. They all need a break. So this time around they ordered the food, but they send the waiters away for some peace and quiet.

"I'd say we're staying here for the night… Lacus… check everyone's status."

Lacus nodded and closed her eyes as her ears twitched, locating the specific individuals' sound. And then, she contacted them using soundwaves. "Hugo is in auction house no 2… they're auctioning some… crazy eyeball thing… he vomited twice, but no horn, but he will keep at it. Godric is still in the arena… They told him the second and third prizes are known, but the first prize was kept secret… for the winner only. He's asking if he may be allowed to participate." She shifted her head a bit. "The Bicorns can wait… but they have some concerns. With the two trolls out for the count for some time, there's a growing line of people out there wanting to get in. They turn the other way when they saw them, but they spotted several Warrior Dwarf companies camping outside."

"…and this is cause for concern because…?"

"Because Dwarves and Goblins hate each other." Salazar explained. "They're both a race of miners. But they just can't get along: one was stubborn to a fault, the other is maliciously cunning. They often clashed in territorial dispute. Remember the legend of how Dwarves created the first Troll Market? Well… they expand too far and too wide, they encountered a Goblin mining expedition. Long story short, the Goblins overrun the Dwarves and they took over management of this place. The Dwarves never forgave them and add this to the long list of bad blood between them, seeing these two races are constantly at war. As far as this Troll Market goes, the Dwarves constantly searched any opportunity to bring a whole army here, kick out the Goblins, and take over."

"But I saw some dwarf merchant out there… heck, some hotels are serving Dwarf guests!"

"True… but they're constantly on the run from the security. They're not allowed to bring in weapons either. The only reason they managed to get away is because the security here is as sloppy as the Goblins: easy to bribe, dumb as a rock, underpaid, incompetent, and etc, etc." Salazar frowned. "But fair warning: sloppy as they are, Goblins' are not to be underestimated, especially if open war were brought before them. The fact that the Dwarves still could not took over this place for decades despite their technological prowess stood testament to that."

Noir sighed. "Alas, that's not our concern right now. Lacus, tell the Bicorns to… keep watch and warn me of any changes… Meanwhile, tell Lord Hufflepuff to continue as is. Sir Gryffindor can participate. But if he can't win, don't push it. There's always another way."

"Heard that." Lacus nodded and delivered the message, from his lips straight to their eardrums.

"Hurp… Understood."

"So I shall!"

"As you wish."

"And they get it." Lacus smiled.

Noir rubbed his temple and nodded… "Master Slytherin… I'm going to start mentioning some names… I want you to tell me if they're human or not." He needs to empty some of the content out of his head.

"I understand."

"Tsurg. (Goblin) Herrothen. (Elvish) Fringa. (Dwarvish) Azhag. (Orc) Grosh. (Orc) Bort'ohg. (Goblin) Guort Hylog…"

Salazar rolled his eyes as he checked each and every one of those names… he really did memorize the entire guest list… As Noir rolled out the names, Salazar pointed out the names: Elven, Dwarvis, Orcish, Goblins, even Centaurs, and Sprites… they went at it for fifteen minutes… from there, they concluded:

"Only 30% of the guests in those three hotels are humans." Noir concluded. "Some of them used pseudo names. And they are known aliases of wanted fugitives listed in Judge's Librarium archives."

"…fugitives!?" Salazar gaped. "…are they…?"

"No. They're criminals, but they have no known skill or abilities related to our quarry. They're not what we're looking for." Noir sighed and groaned as he massaged his feverish temple, thinking.

Salazar also had some things he needs to get off his chest: "Why did you ask me to track their suppliers?"

"…" Noir looked at Salazar briefly… but then, seemingly ignoring his question, he turned to Lacus while she was playing with one of her haro… Then he asked: "…What did you do to me?"

"Pardon?"

"What Lord Yuki said the other day. He said I disappeared off the grid. You made madame Hufflepuff disappeared off the grid. How did you do that?"

Lacus chuckled. As expected of Noir. "It's called Fidelius charm. The spell of secrets."

"Oh. That is a very complex and difficult spell, milady! I'm in awe that you can use it at such a-"

"How did it work?" Noir cut off.

"It stores a secret inside someone. A person. For example… the secret of your location, your whole existence… I kept it inside me. I'm your… Secret Keeper. As long as I hold my silence, you're hidden. People can search for you all they like… they will never be able to see you, hear you, touch you… even if they're standing in front of you, they won't be able to perceive you in any way. The more they want to find you… the more your existence fades. Conversely, people not looking for you would be more likely to find you."

"…but Lord Yuki found me… the two of you can see me."

"Because you let us see you. There are two ways this spell can be broken. The first is for the one whose secret is being kept to tell someone else of his existence. He will reveal his existence to that person and that person alone… but… if the secret keeper says it… if the secret keeper herself opened up… the spell will be broken completely and permanently, and you will be revealed for the whole world to see."

"Interesting…" Noir rubbed his chin, and then finally he turned to Salazar. "That, Master Slytherin… is the reason why I tasked you to track those suppliers."

"…you're suspecting our quarry is using the same spell?" Salazar asked.

"If Lacus is not the only one who can do it? Then yes… I'd like to think it's a strong possibility. After all, we're looking for someone who doesn't want to be found."

"…then… how are we going to find someone who can't be perceived? The Fidelius Charm is foolproof!"

"There are various other ways to detect someone that can't be seen. Making himself unperceivable doesn't mean he doesn't exist anymore. He still needs to eat and drink, no?" Noir frowned, and then he starts making notes. "Based on the information given to me by the Hotel Managers about their guests and their eating patterns, I'm starting to get a good grasp on how much food each type of species can spend in a week. Elves are vegetarians, but they eat half as much as a human. Dwarves eat meat, and they can devour 4 times their body weight. Goblins like things raw. And they hate dwarves so Goblins and Dwarves never went to the same hotel. Centaurs dislike certain dairy products. And etc, etc… from these eating habits, we can deduce a hotel's expenditure."

"How does that help us?"

"Purchase pattern. No matter what world, Hotels are business that operates on a strict profit and loss pattern. Expenditure vs earnings. Every Hotel ought to have their most efficient purchase pattern. Based on the number of guests they have compared to the hotel's capacity, I can create an algorithm that deduces the hotel's most efficient expenditure. So, if there's an expenditure pattern that is out of the norm, that's our cue that there's more to their guest list – they're hosting clients that rather went unseen. We found that… and we found places where our hidden guests may hide."

"…you can do that… just by looking at their guest list!?"

"Don't sell yourself short, master Slytherin. I wouldn't be able to do this without your input. Your knowledge on these beings' customs and culture had been invaluable."

Salazar was too busy jaw dropping he didn't catch the praise. Lacus simply chuckled.

"Noir-kyun is amazing! Did the Circle teach you that?"

"No… Rosso did. Deducing info from purchase pattern was one of his specialties."

"He~eh…!"

And after that, the two just chatted away, with Lacus asking all kinds of trivial questions and Noir was patient enough to answer them. But Salazar felt something welling up in his chest… And it's not admiration… no…

…this is… Ray Yuki's student? Are you kidding me!? He took down two trolls with a pebble, and then he had the insight to track down a killer using only the guest list, using his own side job as a food critic to set up the hotel to track their suppliers down, running this manhunt like it's a military operation… all this… was done by an 8 years old. 8 years old. 8! YEARS! OLD! Salazar had to repeat that fact over and over to make sense of it. And based on what he just said, he's not the only one who can do this! There's more like him out there!? Seriously!? What the hell did that Ray Yuki was trying to make!? Even for specialized law enforcement… this is too much!

"Master Slytherin!"

"Yes!?" Jumping out of his horrified musings, Salazar looked at the two children staring at him. "Yes? What is it?"

"Since we're staying in this hotel for the night, we have other things to do as we rest."

"And… that is…?"

"You said, Unicorn Horns had been one of the staple magical ingredients for centuries of magic history. So let's assume, they have no intention of selling it. They want to use it. We need to find out what the horn could be used for. We find that, and we might be able to track it down." Noir then continued: "I need… access to… all kinds of books, grimoires, scroll, any written record about uses of Unicorn Horn that you can gather."

"B… but we're talking about hundreds and thousands of spells and potions!"

"…then we best get started." And Noir just shoved a hand to Lacus and sure enough, she placed the book: Unicorn Horn Basic Potion Recipes for Dummies 101. "…starting with this one."

'…is he serious…!?'

7 hours, 10 sandwiches, 4 buckets of coffee, 150 books, and nearly a thousand recipes and spells about Unicorn later…

'…he's serious…' Their room, a first class penthouse provided with compliments from the hotel, is quickly turning into a mountainous pile of books of various sizes, the smallest of them are as thick as bricks. The bellboy had been going back and forth carrying books after books after books… as many magical books with a mere mention of Unicorn in them as they can get their hands on. It soon became clear that the Judge had no intention of using his bedroom to sleep. If he plan to sleep at all. Nearing midnight, Lacus, ever loyal at his side finally nodded off and fell asleep on top of all the open books. It was the only time, Salazar noted, that Noir finally moved his eyes away from the books. "…excuse me for a second." Noir gently cradled the small girl and carry her into the bedroom, then he quickly returned to his study. His focus, his concentration… Salazar felt like he's back watching the young Ray Yuki studying in his father's library like a good little nerd…

"…did Ray Yuki teach you to do this? All this?"

"…in a way." Noir shrugged. "…he taught us… that when you have a weakness… don't run from it. People will look for it. Make sure you know it before they do. And then accept it. Face it. Fix it."

"Weakness?" Salazar frowned. "You have weakness?"

"…you're kidding me with that question right?" Noir looked at Salazar… he can somehow imagine his bewildered face behind that mask. "Look at me, and what do you see?"

Salazar perked. He see a bone white mask, with slit for eyes, a black cape that felt like it was made of black mist… but… took away the theatrics… and underneath it is the body of an 8 year old… A pretty… small… undernourished 8 year old. "uuh…"

"…Outside this suit, even before I got injured… I'm one of the weakest Advanced around. Even the Princess can probably kick my ass. I bypassed the Field Judge and get promoted straight to Magister Judge, not because I'm very good… it's because I never had the physical capacity to be a Field Judge. I'm trying to fix it, but it takes time. And in the mean time, this is how I have to make do. I used the other advantage I had. My mind. Study more. Learn more. Sharpen it as much as I could. That's why I read so many books. Our adversary was clearly an expert in Unicorn. Me? I'm an absolute novice. I had to work harder to catch up."

"But you're a genius."

"Genius? You're being very kind, master Slytherin."

"…I'm serious…" Did he not know how many fathers would kill to have sons like him!?

"…let me put it this way… It took me… 3 years of pushing myself to the very limit to get this far… Rosso was my junior… started much later than I was… and he managed to get to my level… in a little over 6 months. How's that for a genius?"

"…" And for a moment, Salazar felt like he had gotten a sneak peek of the depth of the Judge's thought process… he's not being humble or arrogant. He… was just… earnest. He neither underestimates nor overestimates his opponents; he simply faced them with everything he's got, expending everything and fight them head on… He never bragged about his abilities because he was more than aware of what he lacks. The praises coming from his mouth were not sarcasm… they were all his honest opinion…

'Father… this boy is… pure… too pure…' "…and… Lady Lacus?"

"What of her?"

"You believe you can fix her… 'problems?'"

"…" Noir titled his head. "You too, huh?"

"?"

"How smart do you think she is?"

"Pardon?"

Noir jerked his head to that supposed halfwit princess sleeping soundly in the room behind him. "I checked her background once… Her father had her IQ tested five times. All five declared her IQ below average, bordering on her being invalid. The fact she's very good at music simply consider her as a… savant, at best."

"…five times? Why five times?"

"Because… in all five tests she figured out she was being tested. And the idiots who made those tests did it wrong: they were all multiple choice questions."

"And that's a problem?"

"…even if you have absolutely no idea what you're doing, randomly answering a multiple choice question would still give you, on average, 20-30% of it right. She faked her answer by getting it all wrong in some cases." Noir explained. "Here's the rub: knowing which answer is wrong is the same as knowing which one is right. That's her mistake. Everyone's mistake: taking her answer at face value."

"Then… how smart is she?"

Noir revealed something beneath his coat. "Her answer to the previous tests."

Salazar rolled his eyes. Now that he noticed it, Noir had been giving her essay type questions. But her answer: "She drew a herd of giraffes?"

"A herd of giraffe… whose neck incrementally increase in a Fibonacci sequence." Noir answered. "Another time, she answered a multiplication question in prime numbers – which she turned into a musical composition. In her latest test? She does her math test using her original Haro language, a series of drawings of those… Haro things… all of them had a diameter in… four digit binary numbers – which translate into the answer to the questions. She had weird ways of answering them, but she answered them all correctly. And none of them can be made by a mere invalid."

"…"

"The problem with her? She's a genius. A genius unlike anything we've ever seen before. Lacus didn't count things systematically using calculation like most people do. She just…" Noir struggle a bit to find the words to best describe it: "It's like this… her mind had come up with a way to calculate things subconsciously… at a speed far surpassing what even her own consciousness can perceive. Give her a problem, and she just came up with the answer instantly, like it was her gut instinct, like it was guesses. Except those guesses are… an accurate and well calculated answer, almost all the time. And she's conscious of it. That's the scariest part. How smart is she? She's incandescent. An era defining genius. Newton, Galileo, Einstein… put all their IQ together and she still outshined them all."

Salazar was pretty sure his eyebrows are twitching… Since when Children are so much smarter and scarier than grownups!? "So… why do you suppose she hide her intellect?"

"I imagine… life must be really scary for her." Noir shrugged. "…those ears… that let her know everything… combined with that intellect, which let her understand everything so fast, she didn't even have the time to comprehend why… And no one can keep up with her. No one can understand just how much she understands. When she tried to speak things at her pace, they'll just think her as a raving idiot. But she's not an idiot. She a bird who fly so high, higher than anyone… she knows everything… except how to land."

"If she's so smart, why do you force her to study then? What's the point?"

"…I've seen… too many examples… of what kind of damage that much genius can do to a lonely soul. She's been trying so hard to ground herself to our level. I don't think she had much success. So… I tried to teach her how I did it. After all, I'm the idiot. I've crawled my up from the ground. It's the only thing I can do right now. I'm not trying to teach her how to count… I'm trying to teach her how to live."

"Did you think it will work?"

"I don't know, master Slytherin. Contrary to popular belief, I don't always have all the answers." Then Noir looked at the clock… 1:20 AM… "…Let's call it a night. Rest, master Slytherin. We still have a lot to do tomorrow. I'll finish up this book and rest as well."

That's what he said, but he barely got through a quarter of the super thick book in his hand…

Salazar merely shook his head and went to his room and rest. But… sleep does not come so easily to a mind that had went through so much experience in a day. Even one so tired after all the activity… but rest did come… Alas, Salazar sleeps lightly. When he woke up, the night is still dark. Checking the clock he slept only for an hour… '…I need a drink…' then it's back to much needed rest…

When he walked out of his room to the decanter, drowsiness and urgency of thirst made it the center of his attention. One glass of wine later, his belly warmed, he turned around back to his room… then he stopped to get a better look.

Atop the pile of books at the center of the room where he sure he saw Noir earlier is… he saw a white blanket… '…hrm…' Salazar sighed and walked back into his room…

00000008 years later0000000

A white snake crept out of Lacus gloves from somewhere. Lacus let it play in her hand for a bit as she observes the slithering creature in her hand.

"Hikari-daifu, what are you doing?"

"Hikikomori Rakuen's defenses are rock solid. There's enough food here to last for three months. If it has a weakness, is that we're completely cut off from the world." Lacus knelt and let the snake go. The Snake slithered and then slunk into the inexistent floor and disappear. "Well… thankfully I fixed that… somewhat. First off, we need to get a better idea of our surroundings. Shall we?"

As this happened…

Kaguya and Salamandine had finally caught up with their mutual friend. Alas, they can't come close. Not yet. "…what is that?"

"That's… what happened when the Academy had no choice but to use Anbu ninjas to corner my bestie to the point she ran out of places to hide. She just… seals herself inside an indestructible shell of absolute defense."

"…and… she had the Empress and Lady Simca with her?"

"Inside that thing is another dimension, completely separate from the existing reality. Even if the world were to explode all around her, it won't budge unless she opens it from the inside." Kaguya tilted. "The world exploding theory had never been tested, but I remember the Academy threw everything they got at it: from cannons to skyscraper destroying jutsu, and we barely even notice." In other words, all those troopers surrounding that Sphere at the moment won't be able to do anything about it. "Simca and Tien Zi are now inside one of the safest isolation chamber in the world."

"…okay… so… how can we get the Empress out?"

"…I don't know."

"Excuse me?"

"The one I was in back when we were Genins is apparently just a prototype. That was years ago… She made improvements… obviously. But… if it's still had the same feature… it might have the same problem… namely… Only she can get her in or out. She'll be barely aware of the events outside, so… there's no way we can contact her."

"Actually…!"

"AHHHH!" The two jumped in shock… a blue eyed white snake appeared right behind them.

"I managed to fix that weakness, after a fashion." The snake greeted them with the voice of their favorite witch doctor.

"…that voice… Hikari?"

"Heya. Kaguya. Are the children safe?"

"Yes. We put them in Archangel's childcare center… still can't believe such a thing exists." What's a childcare center doing in a super dreadnought!?

"Just one of Kage's better ideas. Though, you do understand we have to move them away eventually."

"Right…" Kaguya stretched out her hands and the snake knowingly slithered onto her arm. "Is Tien Zi with you?"

"Safe and sound. And Simca's here too. She told me a good amount of info regarding our adversaries. Allow me to share them with you now."

And Lacus told them everything from twin's psychological profile, combat history, as well as their unique characteristics.

"Well, I must say, I'm hardly surprised." Salamandine sighed. So in the end, this is yet another one in the long list of the Eunuchs attempts to do away with the empress. "…what should we do?"

"Well, I think it's quite obvious." Hikari simply stated. "I promised Xing Ke I will bring the Empress back by sundown, and by Merlin, I will."

"And how are we going to do that?"

"We~ell…" Lacus' ears had already caught a certain unpleasant sound coming out into the open… And they're heading straight towards a certain location with absolute certainty… "I'm gonna have to wreak a li~ittle havoc."

00000000000000

00000000000000

Just to be clear. Lacus is easily the smartest character in the entire series. She's smarter than Kira and Athrun combined by miles. However, the difference between her and Kira is simply that Kira's a polymath with a broader range of knowledge under his belt, whereas Lacus focused all her attention on being a doctor, with little to no attention given to anything else. That's why, overall, Kira scored higher than Lacus because he's much more flexible.