The smile Santana had on her face when she woke up the next morning was a stark contrast to how her body felt in that moment. Her whole body felt like it had simultaneously been set on fire and was made of lead but still, she felt like skipping out of bed. She absolutely did not expect what ended up being one of the worst nights she had had in a while to turn into one of the sweetest. As her thoughts drifted back to the blonde-haired girl, Santana reached over to her phone, pleasantly surprised to already see a message from said girl.
[My girl Brittz – 9:26am]Morning San! I hope you're feeling better than last night 3 Don't be afraid to message if you ever need a shoulder to lean on or an award-winning joke to cheer you up – that's what friends are for remember ;-)
Santana's chest felt funny from Brittany's kindness. She really was one of the good ones.
[Sent – 9:48am]Morning Britt :) Thanks for saving me from sitting alone on the curb like a loser, my ego needed that! I feel lots better thanks to you!
Well, it wasn't a complete lie. Was she physically any better? Oh, absolutely not. In fact, she was probably even worse. But emotionally, she felt a bit lighter. Like Brittany's silently comforting on the curbside took away some of the weight off her chest. Maybe it was a good idea to open herself up just one more time to someone who really could light up this dark pit Santana had built for herself?
At the sound of rustling about in the room next door, Santana groaned as she tried her best to rush out of bed. Rachel was probably just back from her morning power walk around the block which meant she was about to take up the bathroom for the next hour for her morning cleansing. Who would Santana be if she didn't try to mess up her roommate's day by disturbing her meticulous routine?
She smiled wickedly as she caught sight of Rachel exiting her room at the same moment as her and promptly sprinted for the bathroom with a maniacal laugh as she slammed the door shut.
"Are you serious right now Santana?! I have lunch with Finn at one and if I don't start my cleanse at ten am on the dot it'll totally mess-" Rachel's squawks of rage were promptly drowned out by both the sound of the water and Santana's shower music being conveniently turned up to full volume.
"Ha. Get fucked Berry. Now unless you want to stay there and listen to me shower like a creep, I suggest you scurry off and let me have a moment of goddamn peace," The girl shouted through the door to fully assure she was able to relax away from her nosy roommate.
As each water drop raced its way down her body, Santana let out a deep, shaky sigh. It was like a warm blanket had been cast over her and was able to provide momentary relief and mute the pain that constantly ran through every inch of her. If there were a way of bottling this feeling up and taking it with her, maybe she wouldn't be so in need of a bottle of alcohol to provide this similar sensation. But none of it was ever a permanent fix. It was always going to follow her around like a dark, menacing cloud. But at least, in moments like this, Santana could pretend like everything was okay, that she was just like everyone else.
In what felt like the blink of an eye, the girl's skin was starting to prune up and the water had turned into a barely lukewarm waterfall. Rachel was going to kill her for stealing the hot water, but whatever. She should just have longer legs and beat her to the door.
Speaking of her unfortunate roommate, once Santana had emerged from the bathroom fully clothed and finally presentable for the day ahead, she noticed Rachel hunched over the kitchen table suspiciously whispering intently to Kurt. She did not like the sight of them seemingly trying to hide something from her. Yes, call her a hypocrite because she hid basically everything from everyone, but sue her for being a nosy bitch about other people's lives.
"Alright, why are you acting like two little schoolgirls exchanging secrets at a sleepover?" Santana queried with a raised eyebrow.
"We're not exchanging secrets! We were just talking about what movie we were going to watch tonight."
"Where were you last night?" Both Kurt and Rachel spouted out at the exact same moment. Thankfully Rachel was just as nosy as Santana and unable to keep her mouth shut.
"I- Really Rach? What part of 'keep it subtle' don't you understand?"
"So, you were talking about me. Got it. Okay Hobbit, spill the full story," Santana waited with a raised eyebrow as she reached her hand out for Rachel's Wicked mug, knowingly full well the girl would get the hint of what was about to happen. There was already a smashed-up Streisand mug on its way to the dump right now.
"Alright alright. Move away from the cupboard, slowly, and I'll tell you everything."
Both Santana and Kurt rolled their eyes at Rachel's dramatics, but the former relented and slid into the seat across from her two friends with a huff, looking at them impatiently as Rachel began to speak.
"Well, it was just… Kurt retching last night from his irresponsible alcoholic consumption. So I, as a selfless and kind-hearted friend, went to get him some water and I noticed your bedroom door open. I went to close it because I know what you're like if you think people might be able to watch you sleep," Santana shuddered at the thought. It was part of the reason she could never get behind Twilight. In what world was watching someone sleep like a creeper romantic? That was an invasive weird type of intimacy that she was in no way comfortable with.
"And you weren't there at all. I got curious and went looking for a sign of where you were and noticed your usual boots were gone from the door too. But there was no note, no nothing. You could have been kidnapped for all we knew! Where were you? Why didn't you tell us? It was two in the morning, Santana!"
For a moment, Santana did feel guilty. At the end of the day, they were more than just her roommates…they were her friends (not that she loved to voice that very often). Maybe she should have left a note or sent a text. Although, how was she to no Rachel would be tiptoeing about at that hour?
"Sorry, I didn't realise you were my mother now? You were both asleep when I left, and I was only gone for like an hour or something. I just couldn't sleep so I went for a walk. Clearly nothing happened because I'm unfortunately sat here right in front of you. I don't see what the problem is here?" Santana shifted uncomfortably in her chair. Talking about what led her to escape the apartment was the last thing she had in mind for today. Talking about her vulnerabilities was the last thing she wished to do on any day.
"Santana, you've got to realise you just getting up and leaving so early in the morning must have been worrying for us, right?" Kurt chimed in as a calm voice of reason. He hesitated slightly before expressing his second thought, "Was the pain bad again?"
Santana recoiled almost immediately at Kurt's questioning and folded her arms across herself as she gave him a death stare. She did not like being called out so frank like that, so conveniently ignored everything he had just said and tried to end the conversation.
"Look, here are the facts: I had prepared myself for a full night of fun and drinking, but instead, I had to drag your annoying ass back home at ten pm. Therefore, I was not ready to be fast asleep like a grandma before midnight. My body wasn't for sleeping so I decided to just walk around for a while in the cold air to help me sleep. That's all. Nothing else."
Both Kurt and Rachel looked at her skeptically, but of course Rachel was the only one who would press further on it.
"Are you sure? We just want to be here to help you"
Santana shook her head and managed to give the both of them a flicker of a sad smile. She did appreciate their support, she just really didn't want to have to use it – because that meant that things were bad, and she didn't want that to be part of her future narrative.
"I'm seriously okay guys. I just…can we drop it, please? I'm not- I can't. Not yet."
Kurt and Rachel nodded sympathetically. They knew Santana wasn't ready to open up to them right now. However, this was the closest they had gotten in a long time to her acknowledging something was up with her chronic pain. They both knew she had it, but Santana was very reluctant to divulge much more about her feelings surrounding it. This was a very good baby step forward for the trio.
Once Santana was satisfied that both her friends understood to drop things, she gave them a quick nod of acknowledgement before she busied herself with making some breakfast to distract from the awkward silence that had now settled over them. Conveniently that was the perfect timing for her phone to buzz beside
[My Girl Brittz – 10:32am]I know you might still be dealing with some rough 'morning after' feelings but just remember to take deep breaths, count to ten, and picture me and Lord Tubbington giving you a really big hug. Then you'll feel better in no time
Santana's face subconsciously broke into a face-splitting grin as she saw it was from Brittany. How did she know just what to say to take away all the tension she had built up over the past ten minutes?
With her attention fully focused on her phone, on Brittany, Santana had no clue that her two friends were sat just feet away watching her uncharacteristic behaviour with shit-eating grins and curious gazes. They watched quietly as another buzz went off and Santana smiled wider – if that were even possible – and a quiet giggle escaped her lips. Thankfully they had no idea that Santana was giggling at a picture of Brittany holding up her cat – who really lived up to his name – with a huge smile on her face.
"Okay Kurt, did you just hear that?"
"Oh, I sure did. The infamous Santana Lopez just giggled. I thought you were about to beat our asses a few minutes ago, what the hell just happened? Who is that?"
Before Santana even had a chance to lift her head and toss out an insulting reply, Rachel had scurried up behind trying to get any information on her mood change. She had to know so she could use it next time they needed to de-escalate a Santana blowout.
"Brittany? That name sounds familiar – oh she's that bar girl, isn't she?"
Kurt practically fell out of his chair at hearing that name and Santana was ready to make Rachel 'fall' out of the window as she whipped her head behind her and clutched her phone to her chest.
"Holy shit Hobbit, have you never heard of the term privacy? Back the fuck up."
Her words didn't seem to have any power over the shorter girl now as Rachel just stood there with a stupid grin as Kurt rushed up to give Santana a full interrogation.
"Brittany?! You're texting Brittany?! When did you get her number? I would have remembered you getting her number. I wouldn't have let anyone forget. Tell me everything," Kurt bounced up and down against the breakfast bar in front of Santana and said girl was currently trying to avoid all eye contact as she continued to make her food.
"I don't see how who I text is any of your business, Hummel. It's not even that interesting. I went for my walk last night and bumped into her as she was locking up The Barn and she just wanted my number to make sure I got home safe. That's all."
"She just wanted to make sure you got home safe? Then why are you still messaging her and giggling like a teenager over her texts, huh? Seems like there's more to it to me," Kurt teased light-heartedly, but Santana had grown tired of the teasing and wasn't taking it in such a light, fun way.
"Can you just give this a rest? Don't ruin a perfectly good friendship by doing that crap," She huffed and stomped her foot like a frustrated little kid.
"Santana, he's not trying to ruin anything. C'mon, you've been closing your heart off from any type of feeling for so long that it's actually hurting us. From what I know Brittany's probably the sweetest girl you have ever met and I bet she must really like you. I don't see wha-" Rachel tried to rationalise and get Santana to see things from their rose-coloured glasses vision but the other girl was having none of it in that moment and cut her off.
"STOP! Stop it. I said give this crap a rest. I'm letting myself open up to a friend, a really good fucking friend and I will not have your stupid ideas taint this for me. I don't like her like that," She went silent for a moment and avoided her friends' gaze, unsure whether she believed the statement that just left her mouth, "I just would like a friend who isn't the two of you. Can you just let me do this my way? You know I never do even this. Please just drop it," Santana practically begged.
Both Kurt and Rachel stared at the ground in silence. They had never considered how hard it was for Santana to trust someone enough to just let them in as a friend. To them, any talk of her having a relationship was all in fun but maybe for Santana it was just adding too much weight to the already precarious state her personal relationships felt. She couldn't think so many steps ahead with her friendship with Brittany, she just had to take things one thing at a time, or she would feel too vulnerable and bail.
"Now I'm going to get me some iced coffee because my morning has been adequately fucked up, and that is the only thing that can now save me. I'm going to the café two blocks away and I won't be back for a few hours cause I'm going to study too. I hope that is sufficient warning about my whereabouts. So please don't ever do whatever this morning was ever again. I hated this so much. I'll see you both for take-out tonight," Santana gave a slight wave to her roommates, and strutted out of the door, letting it bang behind her. Once the coast was clear, she leaned her back against the door and closed her eyes for a moment. That was certainly not the morning she had planned. Any sort of mention of her emotions and feelings made her feel like throwing up. It was awkward and uncomfortable, and she was pretty sure that because she had buried most of her feelings for so long that she wouldn't even know how to describe them.
One thing was for sure though, she really liked the idea of having a friendship with Brittany. No stupid comment from Kurt or Rachel was going to ruin this for her. In fact, she was going to rub it in their faces how good of a strictly platonic relationship she can have with the blonde girl.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-
Okay, so she shouldn't have gotten Brittany's number. She really shouldn't have. It has been approximately four days, nine hours, and twenty-seven minutes since they exchanged digits (she wouldn't know that if she didn't keep scrolling back in their conversation to reread messages…) but here Santana is – trying to not burst out laughing in the middle of her lecture with the stupidest smile on her face from Brittany's texts.
[Sent – 11:49am]Okay Britt, you gotta shh! I have douche prof today and he'll totally kick my ass out.
[My girl Brittz – 11:51am] It's not my fault you can't leave me alone for 2 minutes and get off your phone! Who would have thought I'd be such a bad influence on you :P
As she read the end, Santana started to fidget more in her seat – even attracting the attention of the professor for a moment before he just rolled his eyes and moved on. The more she really thought about that, the more it gave her a strange feeling in her stomach. She had no idea the influence Brittany was going to have on her life, but something told her that this girl had the power to turn it all upside down.
[Sent – 11:56am] I'd call you a saint actually for being able to keep my mind from literally melting out my ears.
[Sent – 11:56am]Actually, I wouldn't mind that because it means I wouldn't have to listen to this talking bowling ball head go off about media theory anymore.
[My girl Brittz – 11:57am]I have some good earplugs to stop your brain juice from getting out and staining your clothes?
"Miss Lopez, if you're going to be attending my lecture, I would appreciate your attention please. Or if you have something more important to attend to, the door is right over there," Professor Andrews gave Santana a stern look as he nodded his head towards her phone, indicating that she had been caught.
"Alright alright, it's away – see?" The girl rolled her eyes as she made a big show of slowly placing her phone inside her bag for the rest of the lesson. What a fun ruiner.
Thankfully the last fifteen minutes of class passed relatively painlessly and, remembering she had yet to text her friend back, Santana tried – and failed – to type out a coherent response to Brittany as she tried to rush her way out of class to get to lunch.
[Sent – 12:16pm]Thank duck that iver
[My girl Brittz – 12:16pm]Oh my god your brain really did melt! Santana put it back! Quick!
Santana's heart melted at Brittany's concern as she laughed to herself and made sure to reassure her that she was not, in fact, walking about with no functioning brain. Although, the same couldn't be said for some of the people she was currently walking by on campus. Especially the frat guys who thought following girls around being douches was peak romance.
[Sent – 12:18pm]*Thank fuck that's over
[Sent – 12:18pm]and don't worry Britt, my brain is as sharp and on point as ever. Turns out I can't text, walk, carry three books and stank eye someone at the same time.
[My girl Brittz – 12:19pm] and here I thought you were perfect. I guess you are just human like the rest of us.
[Sent – 12:19pm]Actually can I go back and delete my message? I'd rather not ruin that image for you and continue being that Perfect being
Unbeknownst to Santana, Kurt was sat on a bench waiting on her only a few feet away and had seen her giggling and adorable facial expressions as she messaged away. He wished she could be like this more often – unfiltered and unguarded – when she knew people were actually looking at her.
[My girl Brittz – 12:20pm] Oh no, I won't be doing that. Actually, seeing your flaws just makes me like you even more :-)
[Sent – 12:20pm]3
"Texting someone special over there?" Kurt called out as Santana finally approached and looked up from her phone.
She immediately tried to hide the smile that had been growing from her texts, "It was just Britt," The brunette girl shrugged nonchalantly, "Now get a move on. I only have an hour free until another damn class and I want to actually enjoy it."
Kurt huffed as he followed after his friend into the cafeteria ahead of them, "I know you're stuck on campus all day but why do you have to make me eat the cafeteria food with you? I'm not really into murder-suicide pacts, especially not by food poisoning."
"You're my best friend, which means whatever I have to suffer with you have to do with me. It's called being supportive."
"Yeah whatever," As Santana's phone buzzed in her pocket as they waited in line, a small smile appeared on his face, "How's Brittany doing by the way?"
"Yeah, yeah she's good. She said something about spending the day with her mom, I think. They were having a super fancy lunch or something. So at least one of us is enjoying ourselves."
Brittany practically floated around the kitchen as she began her mom's lunch and medication preparation routine. She wasn't totally lying when she told Santana that she was having a fancy lunch with her mom because making Greek salad was something she only used to have when her and her mom would treat themselves to a fancy brunch morning. Santana just didn't have to know they were eating it in the living room of her tiny apartment – keeping the magic alive and all that.
[Sannybear – 12:32pm]Today's one of those days I wish you could be making me a margarita right now. Another class this afternoon and these assignments are no joke. I can't even have one night off to come to the bar. This is killing me.
[Sent - 12:34pm]I know, poor San. Not seeing me must be very hard.
[Sannybear - 12:35pm] Oh no no, it's just the drink I miss. Maybe Sam too, he's like so crazy good at bartending
[Sent– 12:35pm]Wow way to kill my ego, ouch :'(
[Sannybear – 12:46pm]Oh ha ha.
[Sannybear – 12:48pm] Britt?
[Sannybear – 12:55pm] Are you seriously ignoring me after a little teasing?
Brittany had now kept all her attention on making sure all her mother's medication had all been accounted for and measured out exactly that she hadn't even noticed the barrage of messages on her phone. However, when she noticed it was just Santana being needy and adorable, Brittany decided to purposely hold off for a few more minutes just to see what she would do.
[Sannybear – 12:57pm] Okay FINE. You're a pretty decent bartender. Don't leave me hanging like this!
Okay so she couldn't not play into this just a little bit. Santana was being far too cute, and she selfishly just wanted it to keep on going.
[Sent – 1:00pm] …I'm very very wounded right now
[Sannybear – 1:03pm]You are the best bartender I've ever seen. I only come to The Unicorn Barn so you can tell me your amazing jokes and stories about your cat
[Sent – 1:04pm]I was just asking for a 'sorry' but…I'm not complaining. You're cute.
This had been one of the many times the past few days Brittany got close to telling Santana how much she really liked her, but she knew that would absolutely spook the girl into running far away. So she settled for a simple 'you're cute' and hoping it wasn't too much and the other girl would still come back
[Sannybear – 1:04pm]Yeah…pfft, whatever. If I don't get off the phone and pay attention to Kurt rant about the 'absolute toxic waste' that is the cafeteria food, he might start throwing it at me. Talk to you later Britts xx
Brittany almost wanted to pout at the thought of her peak at such an adorable Santana going away. But she knew that wasn't the last time she would show herself; Brittany was sure of it. Santana was opening herself up more and more each day and she loved seeing this gooey, sweet side of the usually tough brunette girl.
[Sent – 1:05pm]Haha see ya San 3
A smile spread wide across the blonde's face as she finally tucked her phone away in her pocket and focused back fully on the task at hand. With great concentration, she balanced a tray on each hand – one with her expertly prepared lunch that was making her mouth water, and the other with an array of medication all lined up. Despite it being a task she completed daily, the trays shook slightly in her arms every single time. Brittany knew she could have done the sensible one at a time thing, but at this point it was a point of principle for her. That, and it made her feel like she was part of a funky circus performance.
Just as the Greek salad was about to meet its messy demise, her mom reached out and took the tray from her with a tut of disapproval.
"I keep telling you, Peanut, that's just an accident waiting to happen every single time," The woman breathed out as she slowly made her way back to her place on the couch, daughter in tow.
"I totally could have caught it…"
"Oh yes, I completely forgot you grew a third arm during the night." Brittany's eyes widened at that statement as she frantically spun around looking for the non-existent extra limb. When she noticed her mom quietly laughing, she realised it was just one of her dumb jokes. She couldn't help but laugh along with the older woman as she sat on the armchair next to the couch.
Days like these were Brittany's favourite. Days when she could pretend like everything was just like it was a few years ago, like everything was okay.
Her mom always felt like a superhero to her. Unstoppable, invincible, and always there to protect her. It wasn't until a month after she turned nineteen that she realised that maybe her mom was fragile and breakable and just…human.
The older woman always got bronchial infections around Christmas but after Brittany left high school, that had turned into every summer too. Soon it felt like an avalanche had been coming towards them and now it was finally here to swipe their little haven away.
Then came the hospitalisations. It only took just two for that to wipe the independence from her mom as she had to tearfully say goodbye to working at the bar she had built from the ground up and give control of it to her still baby girl of only twenty-one years old.
It wasn't easy at first, calling the place her bar and not her mother's. Brittany could also tell it wasn't easy on her mom either, to hear all the stories from each night that she missed out on. She could see the pain sometimes in the older woman's eyes and that all she wanted was to be making cocktails and new friends each night again.
It wasn't until about three weeks into her new role that Brittany found her whole new world of responsibilities that much easier. That was when Santana walked into her bar for the first time…
~ Flashback ~
"Stop production on the missing person flyers cause I'm fine. I wasn't about to let that bitch ruin The Santana Lopez." A loud voice boomed as the door to The Unicorn Barn was flung open. Brittany's eyes snapped up to the newcomer and she couldn't pull them away. In the doorway was the most beautiful girl she's ever laid eyes upon. She had definitely never seen her before; she would have remembered. Maybe she could be another new patron friend for her?
"No Kurt, seriously…I'm good," The brunette girl, Santana, smiled genuinely, yet with a sense of deep sadness to it, "I broke up with her, remember? I just, you know, wasn't feeling it anymore." Oh, so this girl was fresh from a breakup. Now, this was something Brittany was an expert at helping with now from working here.
"No. It has absolutely nothing to do with that. Would you just drop it already?!" The new girl snapped as her eyes darted all about the bar and the grip on her phone tightened before letting out a deep sigh.
"Look…I just wanted to go somewhere to be alone for the night, okay? I'm at some random bar to destress before I end up committing a federal crime. Right well, I'll text you the address and you can pick me up if you're so desperate to. But don't you dare come before midnight or I'll feed your fashion portfolio to the subway rats, and you can kiss Vogue goodbye."
It was then Santana finally noticed Brittany's raised eyebrow and amused smile being sent her way and had to blink and shake her head to stop herself from staring back at her, a blush covering her cheeks. The blonde thought it was adorable. Brittany nodded her head towards the drinks, silently asking if Santana was going to order something to which she shyly nodded and averted her gaze, finally remembering she had still been on the phone during that whole exchange.
"Huh? Y-yeah. Yeah, I'll see you later. Bye."
Brittany giggled softly at Santana's flustered state as she ended the call and pushed a drink in front of her.
"One margarita for The Santana Lopez. You look like a margarita girl."
Santana scrunched her face up in confusion, now cautiously handing Brittany her card to pay, "You know my name?"
"Well, yeah you don't have much of a quiet voice, especially to that poor person on the call."
"That was Kurt, not some poor person," with the roll of her eyes, yet a small smile on her face, Brittany couldn't tell whether Kurt was Santana's friend or foe. This girl seemed to be almost intentionally hard to understand. But Brittany was stubborn, she would understand her.
"Ah yes, of course. If I still had my psychic powers, I would know all about him," The blonde winked as she flicked her wrist out to give the brunette her card back.
"You want some glitter in it? It's our thing here at The Unicorn Barn to add some sparkle to people's drinks to make sure their nights are filled with a little bit of magic to help them get through whatever they need to get through. It totally works, scouts honor. Well…I was never actually in the scouts, but I still honor it!"
"No. I'll pass on that. I'm not…I don't do sunshine-y stuff like that."
"Suit yourself. I promise you I'll make you try it one of these days though."
"And what makes you think I'll come back?" Santana raised a challenging eyebrow.
"Everyone always comes back to the barn, silly." It was true. Most of the bar patrons had been coming for years – decades even for some – and even newcomers at least came a few times or found themselves back there every so often. This was home to a lot of people. Santana may have thought she was too good to become someone like that but two days later she was back, with Kurt in tow, and two years later they are both now part of the family of regulars. Santana became Brittany's constant at the bar and her visits were what always got her through each week. Even if she was never really up for much of a conversation – since she had Kurt usually speak for the both of them – the small, shy smiles that were because of her were Brittany's treasure. Well, until the recent developments started to change everything.
~ End of flashback ~
Brittany smiled as her mind took her to thoughts about the hot-headed, gorgeous girl, and a light blush covered her cheeks.
"Okay, who is it?"
"It's Brittany, mom. Surely you're not that ill that you're forgetting your own kid's name?" Maybe if she played it off like a joke, she wouldn't have to embarrass herself and talk about her feelings with her mother.
"C'mon don't play that card with me. You've been giggling at your phone for days and sometimes I think you're actually floating around the apartment with how happy you are. Now, who is it? Guy or girl?"
"It's…a girl. She comes to the barn. Her name's Santana" Brittany quietly revealed. It felt odd to actually be talking, out loud, about the girl she had a crush on. She never really needed to voice stuff to Sam because he knew before even she did and he would basically talk about it for her. This was new though, and it's also different gushing to your mom about your crush. Her and her mom talked about everything though, no secrets, so it was almost relieving to finally get it out to her.
"Santana? I don't think I know that name. New girl?"
"No, she's been a regular for a couple of years now. But we only just started talking properly for the past week I guess."
"You've only just started talking to one of the two-year-long regulars? Honey, I didn't think I'd ever have to remind you of bartender etiquette, c'mon now," Whitney scolded her daughter as she shook her head in disapproval.
"Oh trust me, I've been talking her ear off the whole time. Santana is just…she's interesting. She's like a timid animal. It just took her a while to warm up to me but, I think we're really good now." Now Brittany thought about it, it was kind of crazy that Santana had been coming to her bar for so long and it had taken until now for them to get close. Then again, this was Santana she was talking about. However long it took them to get to where they were, Brittany was just glad they got there – even if it was just as friends. It was well worth the wait.
"And what does really good mean?"
"That we've been texting every single day and she started sending me little heart emojis in her texts today," The younger girl gushed as she beamed and bounced in her chair from happiness.
"So you really like like her then?" "Do you think she likes you back?" Brittany frowned at that. Yes, she could easily admit now that she had a pretty big crush on Santana, but did the girl like her back? Would she ever? That wasn't an easy answer. Nothing with Santana was ever easy.
"I mean…I don't know. She's hard to read sometimes. Kurt – that's her best friend – he's been teasing her more about it, but…ugh I don't know," Brittany flopped her head against the back of the chair in frustration, "We only just became proper friends, I don't want to go off into dream land only to get disappointed. I don't want to say something and then have her never come back. I think I'd be miserable for like, ever. And I can't serve people if I look like someone took the marshmallows out of my Lucky Charms all the time." Whitney nodded in understanding. She remembered how complicated feelings could be when you're young and understood Brittany's trepidation – risking a really good friendship and putting your heart on the line like that? Both women had been on the receiving end of too many customers who had lost everything by doing that.
Very quickly though, Brittany had changed the conversation to one of the funny bar stories from her week in order to stop herself from dwelling on her feelings too much. One particular story about one very drunk patron forgetting to pull their pants up after visiting the bathroom and tripping head first into a bachelorette party had caused an eruption of laughter from her mother.
"Britt? Inhaler. Please." Whitney tried to slow her laughter induced coughing fit as she recognised that she required a little bit of assistance.
Brittany's head snapped up from her phone, a smile still on her face as she proceeded to jump up at her mother's request. "Oh crap, yeah of course. I've got it!" She yelled as she rushed to her moms' room to look for a new inhaler for her.
In her rush, the younger girl had left her phone unlocked on the coffee table. Being the nosy mother she was, Whitney just had to see what words this Santana girl was saying to make her smile like that. So she carefully leaned forward slightly and twisted her head to get a good view of just a couple of messages.
[Sannybear – 2:07pm]How do you know exactly what to say? I like you Britt-Britt, I think I'll keep you around.
[Sent – 2:07pm]I like you too San :-) You can't get rid of me 3
Whitney's heart swelled at the sweetness. Despite Brittany's brushing off their relationship as 'just friends', Whitney could tell that something more was brewing. Honestly, she hoped there was. After all the stress her condition has put on her daughter, she deserves this. Brittany deserved to be loved. Whitney was just glad she was still here to be able to see the start of this blossom.
At the sound of her daughter bounding back into the room, the older woman quickly – as quickly as she could, which was not quick at all – sat back into her chair just in time. Brittany was none the wiser and didn't see the knowing smile her mom sent her as she blushed at her phone once more before placing it into her pocket.
-x-x-x-x-x-x-
The best friend duo made it to The Unicorn Barn in record time tonight. Santana would argue that it was because they hadn't been able to go for a week because of deadlines and she was dying for a drink. Kurt had concocted an entirely different argument, and if the constant smirks he was sending her way were any indication, Santana knew exactly what that was. Not even her very best death stares were making him back down. Maybe it had been that long that he was no longer scared of her? If it wasn't for the fact she kind of loved him as her best friend, she would have sent him to the dump for that defect.
The two had barely stepped one foot inside The Barn when they heard cheering coming from the bar.
"There are my two favourite patrons! I missed you guys so much, don't do that again," Brittany bounced up and down and she grinned widely, most of her attention on Santana but Kurt didn't mind at all.
"Well, I don't know how you could have missed us when you've still had this one's attention all week. Genius move, Britt. Satan has been so much tamer. It's been paradise." Santana just rolled her eyes at Kurt's over exaggeration, but she was just so excited to be back in her favourite place that she didn't bother voicing her annoyance this time. So maybe he wasn't over exaggerating…
"Hey San."
"Hi Britt."
The two girls shyly smiled at each other before quickly delving into excited chatter and giggles. Sam watched the two interact, completely dumbfounded. A week ago, Santana could barely even look and Brittany and now he probably couldn't pull the two away from each other. He looked to a grinning Kurt to try and get some answers.
"It's so cute, isn't it? Apparently, they exchanged numbers after you guys closed last weekend and they've been texting non-stop since. I've never seen Santana this gentle with someone before."
Sam started to beam when he heard the news. His best friend was finally getting somewhere with the girl she had been pinning after for so long. He was so happy for her.
"Do you think this means that they'll…you know. That they'll actually get over themselves and admit to each other they like each other, because c'mon, we both know they've both been smitten since day one and just wouldn't admit it."
Kurt's grin quickly turned to a frown as he pulled the blonde further down the bar to make sure they wouldn't be within earshot of Santana. Not that the girl even remembered they were there with how glued to her new friend she had become.
"First of all, we don't bring that topic up in front of Satan. She'll bite your head off, trust me," Kurt started to rub at his temples to try and get rid of the memory that was the headache of bringing any hint of romantic interest up the first time, "Secondly, she's…Santana doesn't have a great track record when it comes to dating, so I'm honestly not that surprised that she's a bit nervous to let things 'escalate' to that again."
"Really? I didn't think Santana would be scared of anything. I didn't peg her as a relationship scaredy-cat. I thought she was like super tough," Sam responded in surprise to hearing Santana wasn't this completely 'tough girl' he had just assumed her to be over the years.
"Yeah, well there's a lot you don't know about her," Kurt snapped. He could be quite protective of his best friend, especially when people made assumptions about her without knowing all the crap she's had to deal with. "Sorry… It's just, she's been through a lot. Even I don't even know the full extent of it, and I've known her since we were fifteen." It was true. Kurt knew things from what he'd seen, and the little bits of information Santana had shared when she confided in him. He knew she had chronic pain, that her mom either blaming her for it or dismissing it completely. He knew that she acted out and got in trouble a lot in high school because she would get angry about how the pain made her feel – but not any real emotional depth. Santana didn't do that.
"In high school, she got herself into a whole load of crap with a bad crowd. Then when she realised men were not her thing and got herself her first girlfriend when we moved out here, that bitch said a lot of things that ruined Santana's confidence. It hurt Santana deeply, and she doesn't like to talk about it or even the slight possibility of that happening again."
"But Britt would never say anything to hurt her. C'mon we all know she's probably one of the kindest people in a hundred-mile radius."
"And you really think she is listening to that rational, optimistic part of her brain?" Kurt sighed. The more he spoke about it aloud, the more he understood where his best friend was coming – but it didn't mean it still wasn't frustrating to see her to this to herself. "Look, I think Santana really does like Brittany. I mean, look how quickly they've become besties after just one little push of exchanging numbers? I think if she was going to get past her own fears for anyone it would be Brittany. Just don't try and push them together, we need to just wait and see what she does on her own terms, okay?"
Sam nodded in understanding and before he could even utter a response, the two were being interrupted by the very subject of their conversation.
"Porcelain get your ass over here! You need to get your drinking on. Poor Britt over here is just trying to do her job for us. I'm already on my second, so you have to order a double now to catch up," Santana yelled as she slammed the bar in order to get his attention, which caused Brittany to smack her hand lightly and chastise her about ruining the vintage wood.
Brittany then slid Kurt over his double strength cosmopolitan with a wink and a whispered, "Don't worry it's on the house as compensation for having to keep up with this one's superhuman alcoholic consumption."
"And here is margarita number two, m'lady. Just the way you like it, dull and gross."
"You better put that away," Santana waved her hand towards the pout on Brittany's face, "I've gone two years without getting all glittery, you're not going to make me cave with a quivering lip." Her words just made the blonde's face light up in a smirk as the memory of their first exchanged resurfaced in Brittany's mind.
"The first day I met you I said I would get you to try it one of these days, and I always keep my promises. Don't underestimate my power, Miss Lopez. I'll get you soon enough."
Santana just rolled her eyes with a playful smile plastered across her face, "I'd like to see you try, Pierce."
~ Four Hours Later ~
"Okay where the hell is he? Unless he's back there applying a whole makeup look, I'm about to get concerned about what's keeping him in that bathroom for this long."
"Oh, you didn't see him slip out? Kurt said he had to leave like ten minutes ago. Something to do with Rachel calling about a break-out disaster, I think? He said you'd be fine and in fact, would be 'absolutely thanking him later,'" Sam answered as he walked by Santana, heading to the back with a tray of empty glasses. He made sure he had a way of unloading the information and fleeing as he didn't want to be caught in the firing line for just being the messenger.
"Ooh that sneaky little weasel. Thank god he's not here to get an ass-kicking," Santana sighed in annoyance. She did feel bad that she hadn't even noticed that the person she came to the bar with had left and hadn't spent as much time with as she should have. Although, surely Kurt was over the moon that she had been instead spending almost all of her night talking to Brittany. Still, Santana felt like she should be getting back to her friend about now.
"That's probably my cue to head out anyway, you'll be closing up soon anyway, right Britt?"
"Yeah, we might even call it early, looks like you're leading all the old-timers out."
Santana gasped and frowned at Brittany's implication that she was in any way associated with the word 'old.' Her body may feel like it actually belonged to an eighty-five-year-old woman at times but she sure as hell tried to not let that seep into her outward appearance.
Brittany just laughed at her exaggerated response and decided to let her out of her misery, "I'm totally kidding, you're too hot to be lumped in with them." Santana's eyes widened at Brittany's comment and felt her whole face turn bright red as she tried to calm the rave of butterflies in her stomach. Thankfully, Brittany didn't make any further comment, just gave a soft smile, "I can totally walk you home again if you don't wanna be out there alone tonight?"
"I don't know Britt… Like you said, you'll be closing soon, and I don't want to inconvenience you guys."
"Nah it's totally cool, me and Mike have closing covered. Britt, you go on ahead and make sure our most loyal customer gets home safe," Sam winked as he rounded the bar with a now empty tray, catching the tail end of the girls' conversation.
"Well, you heard the man. Let me just grab my stuff from out back and I'll get you out front."
It didn't take Brittany long to skip out the doors of The Unicorn Barn and over to Santana with a beaming smile.
The other girl couldn't stop herself from smiling back, it was infectious, and both girls started to walk away from the bar in silence with neither of their smiles leaving their faces. Brittany ended up being the first to break the silence though, when they were about two blocks away from the bar.
"You know, it's been exactly a week since we did this the last time? I think that night was one of my favourites, maybe top three."
"Top three? What's your other two?"
"Well number two would be…it was about six months ago, when Kurt dragged you up on the stage to dance to a Gaga song or something, and I had just never seen you so…carefree before. Your smile probably lit up the bar for the rest of the night. It just made the whole mood of the place so much brighter than night. Everyone was so cheerful." The brunette was taken aback by Brittany's response. She hadn't expected something so…honest. Santana remembered that night well and a small smile started to spread across her face as she thought back on it. She had just found out she had come out on top of every single college class from her second year. Then, her PR internship had informed her she has a job lined up at graduation if she wanted, and her mom had actually said she was 'proud of her initiative' – which was honestly the nicest thing her mother had ever said. Not even the burden of pain could have stopped her that night. So, when Kurt begged her to dance with him that night, she didn't try to stop him for once. She didn't even notice Brittany had been watching her.
Shyly Santana decided to ask, "What's your number one night?" Hoping she was a part of all three.
"Ooh that was probably when Marty brought in his pet rabbit for us to look after because apparently Furby gets very territorial when he brings guys back to his and he didn't want to be cockblocked. So I got to babysit a little fluff for the night and it was amazing," Brittany's eyes sparkled as she remembered the little bunny hopping on top of the bar and following her wherever she went.
"Oh, so I get beaten out by a goddamn bunny rabbit? Charming," Santana huffed. Okay, so not the response she had wanted. But, really, she was a part of two of Brittany's favourite nights at The Unicorn Barn over all the years of working there so she really shouldn't be so greedy. Plus, being this disappointed to not be part of the blonde's favourite memory made her seem desperate and getting herself involved in the other girl in a way she absolutely did not want to do.
"Hey, if you work a little bit harder, you could get the number one spot easy! Do you have any pets you can bring me? That would help."
"I can steal a stray off the street if that would do anything?"
"I like the creativity but I'm going to have to pass on that. I don't think the other patrons would appreciate the smell. Plus, they'd sniff out Lord Tubs on me and most likely go feral. You know their history."
"It's maybe the gang activity. I'd assume he's most likely knifed ninety percent of the street cats within the state of New York."
"Oh yeah, for sure. He's a menace my little boy," Both girls let out laughs that quickly died down and they looked at each other in a genuine, real way they hadn't before and Santana was first to break the comfortable silence that had fell around them.
"You know, last week was one of my favourites too. I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't been there."
"You looked like you needed a friend that night. Are you sure everything's alright? It's just, I've never seen you look so small like that before. You always put on this big bad wolf image but that night you were just like a little pup."
Santana wanted to be mad, wanted to snap at Brittany for thinking she could pry into her personal life like that. But really…was the girl really pointing out something that wasn't obvious? She cried on her shoulder for goodness sake.
"I…yeah everything is okay. I was just going through it; you know how it is sometimes. If it's anything I can't handle, I'll let you know. I promise."
"Pinky promise?" Brittany held out her pinky finger and Santana rolled her eyes playfully at the gesture before one look in Brittany's eyes made her relent and wrap her own around the other girls.
"Yeah, pinky promise, Britt," The brunette squeezed the other girls pinky with her own in reassurance. However, neither girl wanted to be the first to let go from their deal so they ended up walking with their pinkies linked all the way to Santana's apartment, swinging between them as they continued to talk about everything and nothing.
"Well, this is me," Santana pointed her head to her left, indicating that it was, unfortunately, the end of their alone time together.
"You sure you'll be alright to walk the rest of the way to your place?" Santana knew that Brittany probably did this walk home alone every night no problem, but she couldn't help but find herself feeling protective and worried for her new friend. She really wanted to keep her around and that would be hard to do if the other girl got herself kidnapped. That would not be ideal for her.
"Yeah, I'll be good. I'm only a couple of minutes away. but I'll be the one to text this time when I get back safe."
"Good. I can't have anything happening to my new bestie – just don't tell Kurt I said that."
"Oh, but Kurt's already heard that. I'm deeply wounded, Satan." Santana visibly jumped as a voice seemingly coming from the sky boomed above them. Of course with one glance to her left, she could see Kurt hanging out his bedroom window with an overexaggerated pout covering his face. His very untimely interruption of her last few minutes of peace with Brittany caused her to glare up at him and hope that would be enough to make him get lost.
"Okay, creeper. What the fuck do you think you're doing?" The pissed-off girl yelled towards her nosy-ass roommate. He was getting as bad as Rachel.
"I just got off my late-night phone call with Blaine and was enjoying a peaceful gaze out at New York at night when you two rudely interrupted me." Santana wasn't sure she completely bought that – not with the smug look on his face. She was sure he heard the sound of their voices and had bolted straight for the window to see if he could get a sight of whatever fantasy he had concocted.
"Well can you enjoy your peace somewhere else so I can say goodbye to Britts without being ogled at?"
Kurt sighed at the direct call for his departure. If he hadn't have spoken up he could still be able to spy, damn his big mouth. "I suppose I could go and exfoliate before bed… But please spare no details when you get up here, San," Kurt smirked as he quickly backed away from the window before Santana could find a rock or other throwable object to aim straight for his head.
"I swear I'm going to put glass in that exfoliator one of these days," Santana's rant of annoyance was swiftly intercepted as Brittany rolled her eyes and placed a kiss on her cheek to calm her. Immediately Santana closed her mouth and felt like her whole brain just broke down in that moment. She would have convinced herself she had just hallucinated that act had there not been a warm tingle and blush covering her cheeks left over as evidence.
"Be nice, he's just messing with you. Don't let a dumb argument with him ruin such a good night."
As much as Santana really wanted to run up there and let Kurt have it for spying on her time with Brittany, the other girl was right. Arguing with him would just put her in a bad mood and after all the time she's just spent with the blonde, she didn't want anything to taint this night.
"I'll see you tomorrow night?"
"Of course, you can't keep me away," Santana winked as she gave Brittany a bright smile before she turned to walk up the stairs to her apartment.
"Hey San?" Brittany called from a few feet away down the street.
"You've overtaken the rabbit."
If anyone else were to hear Brittany's words, they would think she was completely trashed and spouting nonsense. Yet, her words caused Santana's heart to swell up as she gave a toothy grin in response before she turned back and walked into her apartment complex.
Yeah, this was her number one night too.
XXXXXXX
A/N: Hey…hey…how y'all doing?
Well…it's been almost a year lmao I am SO sorry that I left y'all waiting for so long! When I started this story, I was just starting my master's degree and naively thought I'd have the free time to do writing – turns out, nope!
BUT I've officially handed in my dissertation which means I'm a free woman! I'm taking this next year off to focus on being a carer and taking some more time for things I love (meaning lots more writing, reading, and potentially starting a twitch to feed my video game Love).
But yeah, I'm just super sorry for keeping y'all waiting for so long, I hope this super long chapter can make up for it. I really enjoyed writing it so I hope it's as fun to read for y'all! Any comments/critiques/suggestions are more than welcome – as with this being my first story, I'm always looking to improve my writing!
I'm so appreciative of everyone who has been reading this fic, has followed/favourited, and commented as well. Y'all are super amazing and have a place in my wee little heart.
I hope y'all have the most amazing day/night. Remember you are the Main character in your story and deserve all the love and respect!
I'll see you guys SOON for the next update 3
Tumblr ~ brielrsons