Alright, I'm skipping over pretty much all of episodes two and three here, they'd pretty much happen the exact same way anyway and I'd rather write about something new then copying and pasting something you've probably seen/read a hundred times. We'll pick back up around the beginning of episode four.
Chapter Two: A Hero Arises
Saitama stared at the television screen disinterestedly. There was something on the news about a group of people doing stuff. Just more of the same, probably. There was always something going on nowadays.
Saitama looked up at Genos, who was preparing breakfast. It was strange to have a roommate after all these years of living alone, especially one as eccentric as Genos was. Him being half machine didn't exactly help either. It was kinda creepy how the guy would stare at him unblinkingly for hours at a time, and the faint electronic whirring he constantly made was mildly distracting.
Saitama supposed it was fine. So long as the cyborg didn't make too much noise, he didn't really mind. The extra pair of hands around the house was nice too, but Genos seemed like he was going a bit overboard with the whole thing. And despite all of his, um...personality, he was a good kid, and Saitama liked having him around.
He was very attentive and enthusiastic about the whole 'disciple' thing. To be honest, Saitama forgot about it until the guy showed up at his door. Saitama was about to send him away when the bug crashed through his ceiling and the whole basement thingy happened, and now that they went shopping together, Saitama felt a bond with the cyborg. He didn't have the heart to send him away. Plus, how could he say no to the stash of cash the dude just dropped on the table?
Saitama looked back at the television screen. A woman was talking about a group of people called the paratroopers led by a guy named sledgehammer. They certainly had a creative set of names. Saitama was about to turn off the television when…
"The Paradisers sport shaven heads, which makes them not only uniform in appearance but also quite intimidating. Please be cautious of any man with a bald head."
"What!?" Saitama shouted out loud. How dare these people steal his look and ruin his reputation?
"Sensei!" Genos said upon hearing his Master's shout. "What is the issue? Shall I dispose of it for you?"
"No," Saitama said, changing into his hero costume in a blur. "This is a personal matter."
Saitama was walking through the woods in F City for a while before hearing a frantic panting from behind him. Saitama turned to see a large bald man in a black metal suit with a scar across his nose running towards him. Saitama held his ground as the person skidded to a stop before him.
"Huh? Are you here to join the Paradisers?" the larger bald man asked.
"Nah, for personal reasons, I'm here to smash all your faces in," the smaller bald man replied. He looked past the large man to the empty field beyond."So, is this it?"
"Then die!" The larger bald man screamed, punching Saitama. "Well I'm glad that's over-huh?"
Hammerhead blanched, seeing the shorter bald man standing there as if nothing had happened.
"Ah man, what a letdown. I was kinda intrigued by these new battlesuits I heard about, but all they do is give you super strength," Saitama said, bored already.
"Heh, well I've been waiting to test the full power of the-oomph," Hammerhead shouted, suddenly buck ass naked. He stared down, not understanding what had happened until the smaller bald man raised his smoking fist. "Go home dude, I'm not in the mood. And hey, don't be bad anymore, K?"
Hammerhead nodded his head up and down vigorously before running into the woods, still entirely in the nude. Saitama watched him go before turning to leave, only to hear another voice a moment later.
"Where did Hammerhead run off to?"
Saitama grabbed some kind of knife flying in front of his eyes, and then a sword a moment later, halting it from coming into contact with his eye. Applying a bit of pressure, he snapped the sword into pieces.
Saitama looked in front of him to see a man clad in a black bodysuit with bits of armor, wearing a purple scarf around his neck. He had long black hair tied into a knot, and Saitama could see a sheath for the sword on the man's back and several more places where throwing knives were concealed on the man's body.
The person jumped back, somersaulting in midair to land on his feet twenty feet away. The strange man stared at Saitama. After a moment of silence, the stranger spoke. "Do I know you?"
Saitama shook his head. "Never meet you in my life."
The strange man continued to scrutinize Saitama to the point it was becoming creepy until the figure's eyes widened. "It's you!"
Saitama furrowed his brows. "Uh, what?"
The man glowered at him and struck a pose. "Don't claim to have forgotten wiping out my ninja village! I was only a child, but I remember the day you came and slaughtered all of my brethren! Now, I, Speed o' Sound Sonic will claim vengeance for the souls you took!"
The man lunged at Saitama, spinning midair, shouting "Windblade kick!"
Saitama simply moved to the side and raised his fist towards the strange man. "Checkmate."
Sadly, Saitama did not account for Sonic's momentum. Saitama only realized the gravity of his mistake as Sonic's vulnerable ballsacks slammed into his upheld glove. Saitama winced in sympathy as the ninja jumped back, eyes red with pain. He held his poor nuts between his legs to try and ease the pain but to no avail. It was all Sonic could do to not scream.
"What is your name, villain?" Sonic gasped, failing to mask the pain he was in.
Saitama grimaced. Even invulnerability wouldn't save you from the emotional trauma of having your balls collide with something at such a speed. "It's Saitama."
"Next time we meet, it will be your demise! Think on my name and remember the horrors you brought to my village all those years ago! Remember the carnage and know that my wrath will be twice as bloody! There is nowhere you can hide that the flame of my hatred will not devour you!"
It was actually an impressive threat. Saitama would have applauded if the guy hadn't been squealing like a pig and shaking the whole time. "Train hard!"
Back at his apartment, Saitama was deep in thought. That man today had mistaken him for someone else. Some villain who had killed his whole village or whatever. How could that be? He wasn't a jerk! It's not like he went around slaughtering people he didn't like. And the other man, what was it? Nail? Sharky? Big ol' Stick? Something like that. He asked Saitama if he was going to join his little group. All of these things only pointed to one conclusion. They had no idea who he was.
"Sensei, I have a request," Genos stated abruptly, pulling Saitama from his thoughts.
"Not now Genos, I'm dealing with a crisis," Saitama told him.
"A crisis!" Genos yelled aloud. "What could possibly trouble Master Saitama?"
Saitama sighed. "Those guys earlier didn't know who I was. I've defeated countless monsters and evil organizations. After all these years of being a hero, don't you think someone would have noticed my actions?"
Tatsumaki, Sitch, Agoni, Agoni's grandson, Sekingar, an entire floor of the Hero Association, Metal Knight, Gyoro Gyoro (read: Psykos), Orochi, Elder Centipede, Doctor Genus, Sonic and a bunch of other ninjas all sneezed at the same time.
A thought occurred to Genos. "Master, are you registered with the Hero Association?"
"What's that?" Saitama asked. After a few minutes of explanations later, Saitama nodded. "Let's do it! We'll sign up together and I'll make you my official disciple!"
"Alright!"
Sitch answered the phone next to his desk as he stared at the screen on his computer.
"Sir, the cyborg we've been scouting has just taken the Hero Entrance Exam. He received a perfect score on both the written and physical exams."
Sitch smiled. "Excellent. I'll interview him in an hour, and then we'll put him in S Class, so long as Amai Mask approves."
After a moment's hesitation the man on the other end spoke again. "There was another person who passed the hero entrance exam. In fact, they were the only two who passed today."
"Do whatever his scores befit him," Sitch replied. "I've got bigger problems to worry about."
"Yes sir," the man replied and the line went dead.
Sitch sighed, putting the phone back where it belonged. He looked at the picture on his screen once more, creases of concern evident on his face. In front of him were pictures of the Z City Ghost Town. Rumors were beginning to circulate about a monster lurking there. Based on the evidence in front of him, that might just be the case.
The picture showed a large plot of land of clear dirt. Normally, it wouldn't be much to look at, but the terrifying part was the fact that a few days ago, there had been over a dozen city blocks squatting in that place.
What kind of monster would have the strength to cause destruction on this massive of a scale? And the better question, why? What prompted this kind of response from the beast? Sitch sighed. He was going to have to send in someone to investigate.
Amai Mask received a phone call while riding in the back of his private limousine. He answered with a polite, "Yes?"
"You remember that cyborg we've been scouting?" A male voice asked.
"Of course. What of it?" Amai Mask asked.
"He's recently taken the hero entrance exam and scored a perfect score on both the written and physical exams. Minister Sitch wants to put his in S Class, with your permission."
Amai Mask smiled. "Of course. He's earned it, hasn't he? I think I'll find him and have a chat later on."
"And what of the other?"
"Other? Other what?" Amai Mask snapped.
"There was another man who passed the exam. His physical score was perfect, breaking every record we have," the man replied.
"Oh? How interesting. Perhaps I will speak with him as well, so long as his written exams don't disappoint him," Amai Mask said, not really all that interested.
"Yes sir," the man replied, hanging up abruptly. Amai Mask stared at the phone for a moment before putting it in his pocket. The nerve.
Saitama stretched, not for any benefit of the action, but to try and feel his muscles burn. Ultimately, he was unsuccessful and he shrugged, putting his clothes back on. When he heard about this exam, he had kind of hoped for a bit of a challenge. But the events were incredibly easy, even the written part.
Soon Genos came and found him as he was pulling on his shoes. "Say, Genos, what did you think of the exams?"
"All of the events were pitiful. They provided no physical or cognitive challenge," Genos said.
"I know right? It's like, is that really all it takes to be a hero?" Saitama joked.
"So what rank did you achieve Master?" Genos asked, pulling out a sheet of paper with a large S on it.
"Hey, S Class, not bad," Saitama said. Pulling out his own paper, Saitama smiled. "Looks like I'm not that far behind you. I'm in Class A."
"That's absurd," Genos said, snatching the paper. "You achieved a perfect score on the physical exams, but only achieved 41 of the possible 50 points on the written exam."
Handing Saitama his certificate back, Genos turned. "Don't worry Master, I will correct this mistake."
"What? No! You'll just embarrass me more," Saitama shouted.
Bofoi watched as his drone made it's way out into the middle of nowhere. He frowned, furrowing his brows. What was the newest member of the S Class doing out here? Several scenarios played through Bofoi's head, but only one seemed likely. Perhaps the cyborg had received a mission from the Hero Association. Bofoi knew no mysterious being or organization that hid out here.
With a few clicks of his fingers, Bofoi looked through the Hero Association mission archives. There were no mentions of specialized tasks or threat responses that correlated with either the newest S Class or this location. Bofoi returned to the footage from his stealth drone. So what was this man doing?
When he heard the Hero Association had recruited the cyborg they had been searching for, he was surprised to say the least. He wasn't aware the Hero Association had even approached him. And according to their records, they haven't. Apparently, this man who previously showed no indication of wanting to join the Hero Association came to a testing site and registered to be a hero. And was immediately placed in the S Class, the highest and most prestigious class of heroes. And then immediately goes out into the middle of nowhere for seemingly no reason.
Bofoi was a naturally suspicious person by nature, and this certainly warranted some looking into. He had dispatched one of his high tech stealth drones to track and record the cyborg's movements. He was with another person, and a quick scan through the Hero Association's database revealed it was another man, who had no record of ever existing before this point, who also joined the Hero Association today and aced the physical section of the test. And was now walking through the middle of a canyon.
What on earth were they doing?
The duo stopped in the middle of the canyon. The drone zoomed in on their faces, showing their facial expressions and movements. They seemed to be having a conversation, but at this distance the drone was incapable of making out words.
The pair stopped talking and separated, walking towards opposite ends of the canyon. Bofoi leaned in on his desk, folding his arms together and furrowed his brows even further. The pair turned and faced each other, and the drone's sensors registered the cyborg powering up.
Bofoi slurped a cup of coffee. So these two were going to fight? Interesting. Was the A Class upset at the S Class? Bofoi made sure the drone was recording. Of course it was. He turned back at the screen just in time to see the cyborg lunge at the bald hero.
Bofoi smirked. No A Class could dodge a strike at that speed. At least this had been good for something. If nothing else, he could measure the S Class' speed.
The cyborg flew and landed, far from the A Class and spun, attacking the bald hero again. Bofoi blinked. How was this man dodging the cyborg?
Looking closer, he saw the A Class barely dodging the cyborg's strikes. Hm. The cyborg was reckless. If only he didn't extend himself so far, he would have defeated the other hero by now.
The A Class hero jumped, flying high into the sky. Bofoi gaped. Who was this man?
The battle continued, the bald man staying varying levels ahead of the cyborg. At times they were mere inches apart, and at others they were separated by hundreds of feet of stone.
It was baffling. The A Class wasn't even fighting back. The blond cyborg utilized his strength, speed and flame cannons but could not seem to touch the bald man. And no matter what the cyborg did, the bald man's expression remained a neutral, almost disinterested tone. Was the A Class even trying?
The cyborg landed on the ground, unleashing a massive burst of flame, directly at the A Class. It was definitely capable of wiping out Tiger Level threats and some weaker Demons. Bofoi watched the screen intently. Did he just witness the newest S Class murder another hero?
No, there he was. Behind the cyborg. The cyborg struck at him and the bald man jumped, landing a ways away from the cyborg. Bofoi expected him to rush the bald man again, but he seemed to pause, speaking again. The cyborg positioned him, throwing up a guard. Bofoi sipped his coffee, wondering what he was saying.
Suddenly, the bald man vanished. He reappeared in front of the cyborg again, but disappeared as the cyborg kicked at him. Bofoi didn't have time to blink before a thundering sound pierced his ears. Bofoi spat out his coffee and covered his ears, dropping the coffee on himself. He yelled as the hot liquid dripped all over him. He stood up, frantically brushing the coffee off himself.
Bofoi breathed a sigh of relief as the burning liquid settled, no longer scorching him. When he turned back to the screen, his jaw dropped.
The cracked screen displayed an enormous hole in the mountainside. It was impossible to tell how absurdly large it was, but Bofoi guessed it could be seen from space. There was no dust, no indicator that there had been anything there at all. It had been entirely vaporised.
Amai Mask stepped out of his limousine onto the cracked pavement and sneered. The newest member of the Hero Association and comes to this dump to celebrate? How sad. Perhaps a lesson on etiquette and grace was in order.
After a moment, Amai Mask decided against it. The cyborg was still fresh and had time to be molded. With the right guidance Amai Mask was sure he could become the face of the S Class. They were in desperate need of more graceful heroes. Too many of them were undisciplined or simply unfit to be a hero. Who decided that eating monsters was a viable solution? Or employing a felon and sex offender would shine a good light on the Hero Association? Tatsumaki had incredible potential, if only she wasn't so high strung and refused to go on interviews. King was the same, so much potential but wasting it all. He couldn't argue with the results, but would it really kill them to go on a talk show every once in a while, if only to boost morale and donations to the Hero Association?
The A Class Hero was supposedly here as well. That was convenient. Perhaps the two of them had met at the seminar and decided to celebrate together. No matter. Whatever the reason they were here, Amai Mask could talk to them both at once and get a sense what kind of heroes they would be.
Amai Mask sighed, opening the door and walking into the squalid space with a smile on his face. Hopefully this new face would rekindle the faith in the Hero Association. All he needed was to do is give a little push in the right direction, and wait and see.
The new S Class hero stuck out like a sore thumb in the small place. His golden hair, intense expression and rigid posture gave off a threatening aura in the otherwise quiet environment. His dark clothes and metal exterior certainly drew some attention, and Amai Mask couldn't help but notice a few of the women in the place staring advertently at him, blushes on their face.
The other man, who Amai Mask could only guess to be the A Class hero, was the complete opposite. He wore a bland, generic hero suit, with bright, distracting colors. They clashed despicably, further highlighting the man's bald head. His face was a total foil to the cyborg's ferocious glare, being bland and almost childish.
"Hello Genos. Saitama. May I sit down?" Amai Mask asked cordially, walking up to their table.
"Who are you?" Genos demanded, orange eyes looking on him.
"You may call me Amai Mask. I am the A Class rank one hero," Amai Mask informed them.
"Careful, he might be one of those rookie crushers," the bald hero whispered loudly to the cyborg. Amai Mask had to fight the urge to roll his eyes. Hasn't even been a day and he was already worrying about his ranking? Nothing interesting about this man then. What a shame.
"If he is then I will dispose of him immediately," the cyborg said, standing suddenly.
Amai Mask put up a hand, stopping the cyborg. "I'm not here to fight you. Quite the contrary. I want to congratulate you both on your acceptance to the Hero Association."
The bald man perked up immediately. "Are you going to pay for our udon then?"
Amai Mask blinked. "Er, no."
The bald man sagged down again. "Ah man. This stuff is expensive," he stated blandly. He casually turned to the cyborg and asked. "Hey are you gonna pay for this?"
"Hai!" Genos said loudly, frightening a few of the patrons. The bald man grinned. "Sweetness."
Amai Mask blinked rapidly several times, trying to process what just happened. Clearly these two didn't understand the dynamics of how the Hero Association worked. They would learn soon enough. Clearing his throat, Amai Mask continued. "As I'm sure you're aware, Genos, you're the first admitted into the S Class for quite some time. I do hope you're not experiencing the pressure the title must come with. The executives and myself have a lot of faith in your abilities. I trust you won't let us down."
Genos narrowed his eyes at him. "I assure you, I will not."
Amai Mask smiled devilishly at him. "Good. What did you think of the entrance exams?"
"They were an utter waste of time, a pathetic excuse for a test," Genos spat.
"Hm. As to be expected from someone of your strength," Amai Mask remarked. Standing, Amai Mask addressed the two men. "Excuse me, but I have some business to attend to. Congratulations again on your acceptance to the Hero Association. The industry expects great things from you."
I put Saitama in A Class because he's a lot older in this scenario and has held a job so should be relatively more capable of answering the questions, but not get a perfect score. Because he started out so high, he won't advance as quickly. Ok legitimate question: I know Saitama's bald, but does he have eyebrows? I looked at the anime and manga and still have no clue if he does or not.