This is literally just dumb humor because I'm an adult and taxes suck.
It took forever to corner her.
Hu Tao was a slippery woman at times; easy to find when you didn't want her around and impossible to track down when one actually had something to discuss.
Unless you were nearly dead because then Hu Tao would find you instead , offering her services with a wink, a well-punned pitch, and her business card.
"You can't avoid me forever," said Yanfei, tapping her foot impatiently.
"Who, I? Hu Tao? Avoiding you?" Hu Tao grinned widely, amused by her own words.
"There are legal forms for you to fill and they've been past due for nearly a month-"
"I do believe that I told Mr. Zhongli to submit those," said Hu Tao. She bounced on the balls of her feet, hands clasped behind her back.
Yanfei got it, truly she did. Hu Tao ran a tight ship and her business was one of the most legitimate around; there'd always be dead to lay to rest, and there'd always be people who needed that comfort. Yanfei wouldn't be good with it, most wouldn't be, not really.
But it wasn't an excuse to skirt around legal things, no matter how enterprising one was. When Yanfei turned to address her again, Hu Tao was gone and thirty paces down the road, having snuck off without a peep.
Yanfei was quick to follow, her book slapping against her hip as she hurried after. "Hu Tao!" she called.
To her surprise, Hu Tao listened, stopping dead in her tracks and turning back to her.
"So, it's like this," she started, meeting Yanfei's face with a mischievous smirk. "The Parlor's just been so busy that I kinda forgot. And it's not that I don't want to fill them out-"
"They're tax forms," cut in Yanfei. "No one wants to file those."
"I pride myself in following the law, I'll have you know!" Hu Tao huffed, arms crossed over her chest. Then, she pressed her hand to her chin as she thought. "Actually, that reminds me; I have some questions that maybe you could answer. There's this client that I could use some advice on. Something about their brother being off adventuring, but they refuse to listen to a two-for-one deal and-"
"That would be a flat rate of six thousand Mora," said Yanfei, smiling a little too sweet to be genuinely nice.
Hu Tao pouted, her cheeks puffing out. "Oh, you're no fun."
"No one works for free, least of all you. Which you would know because you usually file your taxes-"
"I swear to you, it's on my list. It's just a long list. A long, long list of things to do, and Mr. Zhongli, bless his strangely old-fashioned soul, has been distracted as of late."
Yanfei blinked at that. "Mr. Zhongli is usually distracted." The man was the most distracted person that she knew, head in the clouds, feet barely on the ground. Yanfei oft wondered how he never walked right off a cliff, he was dense enough at times.
"Okay, then," said Hu Tao. "More so than usual."
Yanfei believed it. Liyue Harbor was still rebuilding in the aftermath of the rise of Osial- part of the reason that the Wansheng Funeral Parlor had likely been so very busy. It was a good time to be in the business of death, as morbid a thought it was.
"Miss Hu Tao," said Yanfei gently, "Just be honest. You aren't in trouble, I just need the paperwork. I certainly don't want to be the one to have to temporarily close the place down because your operating license has been temporarily suspended."
"Ahhhhh," sighed Hu Tao, her head tipping back, seemingly aggrieved. "So, admittedly, it's kinda dumb."
"I promise you it isn't any worse than what I've seen and heard before." Because Yanfei's seen some weird shit in her life as legal council, some things so bad that she'd blocked them from her mind entirely.
Until she was reminded of them.
"Am I crazy, or are the forms… you know, different."
"Different?"
"Funky. Off. The numbers came out all wrong. And Morax above, I certainly didn't let Mr. Zhongli run those because he doesn't know a Mora from a rock, so I know the math is sound."
Yanfei considered her words. "Admittedly, I'm still looking over the new tax addendums that the Qixing passed. Someone's gotta pay for the Jade Harbor crashing down, you know. I wasn't yet aware that it might affect businesses, though."
"Well, seems like it did, so I've been crunching the numbers again to double-check."
Yanfei pats the book at her side lovingly and thumbs at her chin with her other hand. "I wonder," she murmured, thinking and thinking.
"Wondering isn't usually good," said Hu Tao. "Not when it comes to you."
Yanfei turned back to her. "Why don't we do the forms together?"
Hu tao blinked, processing her words, then screeched. "Ehhhh?"
Yanfei winced slightly at the loud noise. "It'd be a win-win you know. Help your business and help mine? We can do it together while sharing a nice lunch. I'm dying to know what's on Xiangling's menu for the day."
"Hmm," thought Hu Tao, rubbing at her chin. She eyed Yanfei warily as though she expected there to be more to the deal.
And, to be fair, when working with Yanfei there often was. Such was the nature of binding legal contracts.
"I swear," said Yanfei, "No tricks up my sleeve. I mean only solid legal advice."
Hu Tao sighed. "Might as well. Mr. Zhongli's useless when it comes to this kind of thing. One has to wonder how he lives his daily life? Like, how'd he become an adult without knowing the most basic of things?"
"You hired him," said Yanfei quite simply, "Which means you can fire him."
Hu Tao puffed out her cheeks. "He makes good tea," she said, as though it explained away why she put up with his eccentricities.
Yanfei rolled her eyes. "Look, want the help or not?"
"I, Hu Tao, of the Wangshen Funeral Parlor happily accept the bargain."
They shook hands and turned for Wanmin Restaurant, taking the walk slow as she chattered about.
It wasn't until they were settled neatly into a table at the Wanmin Restaurant that Yanfei generously quoted a total sum for her legal fees.