Keldeo stood up on his hindlegs in his Resolute Form, his Secret Sword shining brightly.

The show must go on!

Go on. . . go on. . . go on. . . go on. . .go on. . .go on. . .

Keldeo the Critic- Season Six

Episode 15: Editorial 8 - GOTCHA: DC League of Super-Pets

Keldeo smiled and said, "It's me. Keldeo the Critic. I review it so you don't have to."

Keldeo sighed nostalgically and said, "So, arguably one of the best cartoons, as in western animation, Matthais and I have ever seen was Krypto the Superdog (2005 - 2006)."

The catchy theme song began to play as clips from the cartoon were shown, featuring Krypto the Superdog, Streaky the Supercat, Ace the Bathound, and Krypto's human friend Kevin.

"Yeah, this show was great, and important," Keldeo said with a grin, "You see, I think this show single handedly made people interested in the pets of the DC superheroes. Sure, the Super-Pets were always in the comics, and the pets did make occasional cameos before this show, but Krypto the Superdog was what really set the DC Super-Pets franchise on fire. Not only is it cool to see animal version of the DC superheroes and villains battle it on in a fun, comical way that harkens back to the classic Hannah Barbera cartoons, but the show also proved that forgotten characters can be brought back at any time to great success. Matthais and I were sure that the Dog Star Patrol were a bunch of random alien dogs the show writers made up, but no! These characters actually first debuted as the Space Canine Patrol Agents in Superboy (volume 1) #131 all the way back in July 1966! WOW!"

Keldeo grinned and said,"It was also a good idea to have Krypto stay with an ordinary boy that used a translator to talk to Krypto under the excuse that Superman was always busy on missions. Kevin was the perfect audience surrogate to the kids watching, and he was a good likeable kid too."

Keldeo nodded, and continued, "And, yeah, the show only ran for one year at 2 seasons, 26 episodes in the first and 13 in the second, but it still did it's job. Everyone was interested in the DC Super-Pets. I'm sure you've seen those weirdly animated, simply designed shorts and the kids books that were published to go with them. They weren't as good as Krypto the Superdog, but they were fun, and they also reintroduced ALLLLLLLLLL of the Super-Pets. Did you know that Wonder Woman had a pet alien kangaroo? How about B'dg and Ch'p, the alien squirrel Green Lanterns? And don't get me started on Dex-Starr, the cat Red Lantern! Seriously, EVERYONE loves this villainous cat! Probably because of his tragic backstory of losing his loving owner and nearly getting drowned by evil humans. All I know is, this cat joined the Batman Who Laughs in the hall of DC characters that shot up in popularity overnight! The Super-Pets also came up in both versions of DC Super Hero Girls and in Justice League Action. Dex-Starr actually got an entire episode of each series all to himself!"

Keldeo's smile got even bigger and he said, "And now, we finally got a feature film starring the DC Super-Pets! When Matthais and first saw that teaser of Krypto tapping his collar nad unleashing his cape- OH MAN! It just felt so AWESOME! And now that the actual full trailer is out, we can finally bask in the excitement of knowing that this movie will be just what we've waiting for-GOTCHA! This trailer was a slap in the face! It drove me crazy seeing such an incredible let down! UGH!"

Keldeo hung his head and sighed, "Okay, let's get this over with."

Keldeo nodded and said, "Alright, so this movie isn't in the same universe as the cartoon, obviously. So of course Krypto is with Clark Kent/Superman, which means that Streaky the Supercat will be with Supergirl. Fine, either way, it'll be great to see Krypto and his faithful feline sidekick play off each other. Krypto is lively and loves to help, while Streaky is on the lazy side and loves to eat and can be sarcastic, but still wants to be a hero. It'll be great to see Streaky make sarcastic quips and stuff-GOTCHA! Steaky is not in the movie! Wh-what!? WHY!? Why would you take out Supercat, Streaky was a perfect sidekick to Krypto, why would you not include him!?"

Keldeo groaned and said, "Okay, fine, no Streaky. But at least we have Ace the Bathound. The design they gave Ace was perfect for Batman, he was a sleek, steel grey German Shepherd, the perfect contrast to Krypto-GOTCHA! The turned him into a big, pudgy hound dog! Look, I'm not being a dog racist, or breedist, or anything, but the whole point of a Super-Pet is that they are similar to their Superhero. I mean, sure, if this is Bruce Wayne's dog, then-GOTCHA! Ace is not even Batman's dog at the start of this movie! He's just a random dog from a animal shelter named Ace! But fine, if he has dreams and aspirations to be Batman's dog, then who am I to argue? If he's making the effort to be a smart detective and all serious-GOTCHA! He's a stupid goofball! A large section of this trailer is devoted to Ace peeing on a statue! What a disgrace! But fine, if he can get through this movie with no powers then I supposed he's earned my respect-GOTCHA! THEY GAVE ACE POWERS! They gave him super strength and invulnerability! This literally defeats the purpose of being Batman's dog! Ace is now literally stronger than Batman! Are you kidding me!"

Keldeo face hoofed and sighed, then put his hoof back down and continued, "Okay, so Ace is a let down. But at least we got Robbie the Robin, he was a fun sidekick and it was nice when Ace warmed up to him in the 2005 cartoon, maybe he could be the serious one in the movie while still keeping his warmth and charm-GOTCHA! Robbie's not in the movie either! Why am I not surprised?"

Keldeo held up a forehoof and said, "Okay, so what is the plot of this film? Lex Luthor manages to capture the Justice League and Krypto and Ace have to assemble a team to save them. Okay, cool, so this is when we get to see all of the other Super-Pets. Jumpa the alien kangaroo, Detective Chimp, maybe one of Aquaman's sea creature friends-GOTCHA! None of those Super-Pets are in this movie! Don't these writers know how dedicated these comic books fans are? Do they seriously not realise that when you call a movie DC League of Super-Pets, people are going to expect to see the Super-Pets. DC published loads of books showcasing every single Super-Pet, and none of the good ones even show up in their multimillion dollar movie! What is wrong with them?"

Keldeo waved his forehoof around and said, "Well, okay, I was wrong. There actually is one other actual Super-Pet on the team. It's Ch'p the alien squirrel-GOTCHA! Not only is Ch'p not an alien anymore, his name is just spelled Chip. He's not an alien, he's not interesting, he's just a random Earth squirrel. But fine, he's still a Green Lantern, it'll be cool to see him get the ring and show off those energy construct powers-GOTCHA! HE'S NOT EVEN A GREEN LANTERN! WHAT?!Instead, he just has electricity powers. Why did you give this squirrel the powers of Static Shock? Just make a Static Shock movie! I liked the Static Shock cartoon! I want to see Static as a cool black human guy, not an annoying red squirrel with an annoying voice!"

BZZZZZT!

Hi, Matthais Unidostres here. While I would've much rather had Chip/Ch'p be a Green Lantern like he's supposed to be, Chip is still on the road to be the most entertaining character in this film. I'm looking forward to seeing him master his new powers and have plenty of funny, entertaining scenes with witty dialogue. I think Chip might be a suitable replacement for Streaky in this.

BZZZZZT!

"Okay, okay," Keldeo said as he put his hoof back down, "Okay, so, I'm pretty sure the other characters will make up for these let down. I'm sure we'll get some cool looking animals with cool powers-GOTCHA! Next we get a pig who just grows big. It's not like the pig gets angry like the Hulk or has any other abilities. The pig just grows big. That's it! That has got to be the laziest Super-Hero idea ever made."

"But, okay, I saved the best for last, this character is actually pretty cool-GOTCHA! It's just a turtle that goes fast! That's gotta be the second laziest-."

Keldeo was cut off when Victini flew in and whispered something in his ear. Keldeo's eyes widened, and he turned to Victini and said, "Really?'

Victini nodded, then stuck his tongue out and Keldeo and flew off.

Keldeo blinked, then faced forward and nodded, "Well. . .okay then. It turns out Merton, aka the Terrific Whatzit, is actually a real character from the comics. He was actually DC's first talking animal superhero, and he first appeared in Funny Stuff #1 (Summer 1944) and was created by Martin Naydel. . .Wow. . .Okay, reverse GOTCHA!"

Keldeo nodded and said, "Okay, so we've got our heroes, now it's time for our villains. If Lex Luthor is the main human villain, then the main animal villain must be Lex's evil pet iguana, Ignatius! A greedy, sneaky, selfish little opportunistic schemer who will probably end up borrowing Luthor's technology and weapons to try and take out Krypto-GOTCHA! Of course Ignatius isn't in this movie! Why should I get my hopes up over things like this!"

But then Keldeo smiled and said, "But you know what, at least we can count on Dex-Starr to show up, because this cat is extremely popular, he's showed up in the cartoons like I said earlier, he'll be a great final challenge, we can have Chip fight him to reference or even foreshadow Chip being a Green Lantern- GOTCHA! DEX-STARR'S NOT EVEN IN THE MOVIE!"

Keldeo stomped his hoof and said, "Fine, well the villain pet in this film better be good-GOTCHA! It's just a random orange kitten! Whatever, as long as the kitten has cool powers-DOUBLE GOTCHA! All it does is suit missiles out of its tail! This movie is like horrible fanfiction written by a toddler. Uggh!"

Keldeo stormed off and shouted, "That's it, I don't care, I give up, see you next time!"

The End

Credits

Vito (YouTube)

Krypto the Superdog (2005 -2006)

DC Superhero Girls (2015)

DC Superhero Girls (2019)

Justice League Action (2016 - 2018)

Static Shock (2000 - 2004)