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Scarce to be Counted

Sunday—June 21, 2021

Goro stirred from his slumber and felt around for the warmth of his friend's body, smiling to himself as his fingers touched soft skin. Ren murmured sleepily and slowly opened his eyes, looking a bit disgruntled. Goro sent him an apologetic look, trying to put the other back to sleep, but Ren was already sitting up and rubbing the corners of his eyes.

"Morning," he rumbled, voice hoarse from the lack of use. "Sleep okay?"

"Well, thank you," Goro replied and stretched stiffly, swearing he was going to find a comfortable way to sleep without feeling like his bones were shifting back into place each morning. "And yourself?"

"Better."

It was not the answer he was expecting and perhaps he was reading too much into it, but the timing was too much of a coincidence. He looked at the sleepy teen in bed and laid back down.

"Better?"

Ren hummed but his eyes were still closed. "Yeah. Are you busy today?"

"No?" Goro answered although it came out more like a question than a statement; he was taken aback by the abruptness of the inquiry, but surely Ren knew he always tried to make plans with him. "Why?"

"I owe you a match, Akechi," Ren said knowingly and lifted his hand so his fingers brushed Goro's. "I still have the king."

A chess match sounded like the perfect way to spend time with him—it was mentally stimulating and he had been craving a rematch after he had lost the last game. Goro's fingers twitched in response.

"If that's what you want."

"You lost the last match," Ren said and rolled over on his stomach, head turned to the side so he could look.

Goro emulated the other and scowled. "You won it by luck."

"Is that it?" Ren snickered and propped himself up on his elbows, teeth grazing his lip. "I've forgotten how competitive you get."

Goro hummed and clicked his tongue. He slid out of bed and headed for the bathroom to get ready. He was about to close the door when it swung back open, nearly hitting him in the face. Goro jumped back with a grunt of surprise, glaring at Ren, who barged in.

"What are you doing?" he demanded.

"Getting ready."

Goro huffed, but the pair shared the space and got ready. He feigned annoyance though he knew it was hardly convincing.

Getting ready in the morning together was a completely foreign concept as they always took turns or Ren was up before him and already preparing breakfast by the time he was getting up for the morning. Therefore, it felt oddly routine to have his friend on his right, washing his face and brushing his teeth—doing such normal, daily things he never saw before.

"I need to do a few things today," Ren stated as he stared briefly at his reflection, shoving his glasses on his nose and pushing them into place. "I'd like you there."

"Sure, but what is it?" Goro asked curiously, looking at him through the mirror, lifting an eyebrow.

"Do you have plans?" Ren inquired, sounding genuinely worried.

"You know I don't," Goro snorted, but involuntarily added in a smaller voice, one barely audible. "You know I'd clear a schedule."

Ren smiled gently and nodded. "I'll meet you in the kitchen."

Goro never worried much about his outfits, but he was now second-guessing his entire wardrobe choice. He was never sure if the clothes he wore were too formal or too casual and he was no more sure than before—it did not help that Ren's choice of style was similar throughout and he couldn't use that as a gage. Finally, he settled on something he hoped was in between and ventured to the kitchen, feeling uncharacteristically self-conscious.

Ren stood in the middle of the kitchen wearing something quite different than what he usually wore. Goro wondered what the occasion was, but he didn't get to ask because he was occupied. Ren had a lopsided smile, talking rapidly into his phone in English, but the moment Goro walked in, he hastily hung up. Suddenly, he felt that old and familiar flare of jealousy.

"Who're you talking to?"

"Futaba-chan," Ren said softly, rubbing the back of his neck.

And that flare turned into a burning sensation. Goro wasn't sure if Ren was purposely being suspicious, or if he truly was that oblivious to his obviousness. However, he didn't have time to ponder the question—the ravenette was holding up his hand to stop his onslaught of inquiries.

"Stay there. I need to get something."

He watched curiously as Ren departed the kitchen and disappeared down their hallway for a few minutes before he came out with something in his hands. He couldn't quite see, but from the way Ren was holding it, it looked pretty bulky. Goro narrowed his eyes and felt his breath hitch when he revealed what he was carrying. Ren had presented him with the same chess board from Leblanc—same chips and cracks….

"How?"

Ren chuckled and set it on the table, walking around it to close the distance between them. Goro braced his hands on the surface as he stared at the board—the very one he and Ren had spent hours sharing.

"Now that we're in the west…."

Goro looked up just as Ren tossed him something black. He caught it with a grunt and opened his palm to see that he had caught his own glove. Ren flicked an eyebrow up at him as his eyes silently traveled down to the board and the missing—

"King."

He opened the glove to find the king wrapped up in it. Goro's throat closed as deep-seated memories began to stir; he remembered the day he admitted his complex feelings that ranged from envy to awe. It was a moment he would never forget.

"It'll be my checkmate," Ren murmured as he looked at the chessboard with a small but hollow smile. He took a seat and used a long leg to push the chair out across from him. "Change my mind."

Goro bit his lip and sat down slowly, placing the king with the other pieces. He moved his chair closer, elbows resting on the table, and put his chin on his folded hands. Ren moved first and the game began….

But his heart was barely in the match and "being distracted" was putting it lightly. Goro had already made several detrimental mistakes that had cost him his two rooks and a bishop yet he couldn't bring himself to be upset about it—not this time. Instead, his mind went back to the times he had considered simpler but harder. Now free from the mask he had had to wear back then, Goro felt like he could release a bit of himself little by little.

"What is it?"

Goro looked up in surprise by the sudden break in silence. Ren was eyeing him with apprehension, the same kind he would give an enemy before a fight.

"What's on your mind?"

"A leader must be willing to sacrifice their pieces to obtain total victory yet you fall back to protect your knight," Goro observed as he watched Ren's predictable movements. He countered by moving his. "Nothing short of what you need to learn as a leader, yourself."

"I find," Ren said slowly, eyes never straying from the board. "When you are a Trickster, you tend to find unorthodox ways."

Goro snorted but his mockery died somewhere in his throat. Ren had effectively used both rooks and his queen to take out his best line of defense and effectively pin his king to the edge of the board, cutting off his escape. His head snapped up and he let out an involuntary gasp.

"Checkmate."

"How?" Goro demanded, hands slamming on the surface of the table before they carded through his hair. "I don't understand."

"Maybe you won't ever," Ren replied bluntly, but there was a soft smile on his face as he leaned forward. "But, I will always do what I can to protect my friends—you, included."

"How sentimental," Goro huffed with his arms folded.

However, Ren was not triggered. "You might make fun of me for it, but if there's one thing I learned from all this—"

Goro watched Ren wave a hand to the air in general, but he knew what it was supposed to mean.

"A leader is nothing without his allies."

For the first time, Goro had no rebuttal readily available at his disposal. He could only sit there with his mouth opening and closing as he searched desperately for some sort of comeback. Ren must have noticed his floundering, but he did not make fun of it or point it out. Instead, he rose to his feet, subtly pocketing the king and glove, and held out his hand.

"Ready?"

"For what?" Goro asked, looking up at Ren with his eyebrow raised.

"Our day out," Ren replied.

Goro rose to his feet, taking Ren's hand to help himself up. He dusted his shirt off and sighed, throwing one last glare at the chessboard before he followed Ren to the door, stopping short when he realized something.

"Where is everyone?"

"Had plans," Ren said and stretched, hand reaching up to rub the back of his neck. "Why are you so hesitant to spend time with me?"

"I'm not," Goro insisted stubbornly and a bit defiantly.

"Prove it."

Goro huffed and gestured impatiently to the door.

Despite his curiosity, he refused to ask where they were going. However, it did not take long for them to reach their first destination. Ren had first taken him to a small cafe, where they had baked goods and coffee; Goro never minded the bitter drink, but after having a taste of Ren's, it was hard to enjoy anyone else's. However, he drank it out of politeness, staring at the other across from him.

"What?" he asked as he noticed Ren scrutinizing him with narrowed eyes behind those reflective lenses.

"Nothing," the teen said casually, shrugging a shoulder before setting his cup down. "Do you remember the last time we went to a cafe?"

"You offered to dress me up more often," Goro said with a slight blush creeping up on his cheeks. "Of course I remember. I am surprised you do."

"Why wouldn't I?" Ren snorted and drummed his fingers against the surface of the table. "We used to spend a lot of time together."

"Yeah," he said slowly as if prompting for an explanation for the topic of the conversation.

"You asked me, Goro, if there was anything we needed to talk about," Ren said and leaned forward. "In May….the night before we left Tokyo. Do you remember?"

Goro hummed reluctantly with a nod.

"Why don't we start today?" he pressed, one corner of his lip turning up in the slightest.

"Who controls it?" Goro scoffed boorishly and set his jaw, having no desire to be ridiculed for his past mistakes. "Who gets a say?"

"You do," Ren said with an acknowledging dip of his head. "I haven't been listening to you, but I should."

Goro, not expecting this, leaned back and blinked.

"I've known you for a while, Goro, and after everything we've been through together," Ren said a bit softer this time, but with the same conviction and confidence he had as Joker. "It's obvious to me when there's something bothering you."

Everything he had said was true; like Ren, Goro could read his counterpart like a book for the most part. While he was still working his way to the ravenette's true heart, he could catch glimpses into Ren's mind every now and then. It was fleeting and often muddled, but he could see through the perfectly placed facade. Perhaps it was his improving skills or perhaps Rne was finally letting his walls down, one by one, and allowing for transient looks in.

"We're restless," the Detective said as his expression turned troubled.

"Yeah," he said and looked at his hands as if he was taking the blame. Ren wrapped his fingers around his cup, gripping it tightly. "I just….I—yeah. We are. Is that the reason why you agreed to sign Igor's contract?"

Goro frowned lightly. "It's not like you weren't going to."

"I would have turned it down if it's what you wanted," Ren said without missing a beat and Goro believed him. "I would have signed it for you, too."

"So, why did you?" Goro asked, turning the question back to him.

"Because I thought it was what we both wanted," Ren said and relinquished his hold and let his hand rest on the table, inching closer to Goro's. "It's what I believed. We're restless, aren't we? You didn't want to retire either."

"No," Goro said in agreement, pushing his hand the rest of the inch to let their fingers brush casually, something that made his heart pound and his head spin uncontrollably. Through the dizziness, he could see Ren's lips twitch upwards, which sent fire through his veins. "No, I wasn't ready to let it go."

"I know," the Trickster said and tapped his index twice. "I feel the same way."

Goro, at a loss of what to say, just stared at the tips of Ren's brown boots; but, he didn't get to stay lost in his thoughts for long. After he had taken his last sip of coffee, Ren was already moving on to their next destination. Hesitant, all he could do was follow him to the unknown and trust it was not going to go from bad to worse. The pair headed for the subway, which was no different than the ones in Tokyo; the heat, however, was stifling.

"Here," Ren said once they were seated, pulling out headphones and his phone. "It won't be long but it'll take your mind off the heat."

Goro chuckled involuntarily and accepted the right headphone, putting it in and leaning back in the seat; immediately, the music strummed through the earpiece, filling his head with a slow melody and foreign lyrics. Still, there was something about sharing these kinds of moments with Ren that made it feel like it was the most precious moment….and he was never going to forget.

Ren rested his arm on his knee as he stole sideways glances, a smile gracing those lips as Goro was occupied melting himself into the music. Ren had a peculiar taste, but he did not hate it. The brunette closed his eyes and focused on the lyrics and their meaning, unaware he was being watched.

They only got through four of five songs before their stop came up. Goro looked sullen at this, but Ren merely chuckled as he wound the wires around his phone.

"There'll be more," he said and supported Goro's back as he rose to his feet.

Goro felt his mouth go dry and his back shiver at the touch; he followed Ren out of the subway and outside, where he was greeted with a soft breeze and the sound of seagulls screaming above. He looked up and around for a moment or two before he knew where he was.

"The East River?"

"Yeah," Ren said as the sun dipped behind the graying clouds.

The two of them walked over to the railing, wind beginning to pick up speed. People ran by without giving them a second glance, minding their business and leaving them to their own. No one was trying to sneak pictures of the famous Japanese detective, craning their necks and whispering about him subtly or obviously. No one was pointing at him….

Right now, it was just the two of them. It was just him and Ren.

"I want you to try something," Ren said suddenly, shoving his hands in his pockets as he spoke….almost like he was nervous.

Goro, never one to back down from a challenge, merely waited silently.

"I don't want you to think," he said as the wind blew his bangs in front of his eyes, hiding them from view. He dipped his head a bit lower as if covering his face. "And let whatever you do first be your answer."

Goro drew his eyebrows together. Despite his apprehension, he was curious. "Try me."

Ren swallowed and finally raised his head to look at him. "Where did you go….after Shido?"

"Here and there," Goro said earnestly, looking out over the river, though the breeze coming off it did little to cool down the rising heat in his body. "I didn't really go anywhere. I didn't have anywhere to go."

"Why didn't you just….come back?" Ren inquired, but his voice wavered with suppressed emotion.

"After everything I've done?" Goro snorted as if the answer was obvious even though he knew how convoluted their situation was.

"You sacrificed yourself for us."

Goro's mind told him to lie, but his heart told him to tell the truth; he had never endured this kind of inner conflict, but he found it harder than the doubts about his father. He looked up at Ren, but found he could not look away.

"For you."

Ren knit his eyebrows.

"To protect you."

Goro ran a hand through his hair and wrapped his jacket around himself tighter, wishing the water would come and wash him away. The bars around his heart were being slowly prised apart and each inch of movement struck him harder. Ren pushed his glasses up his nose as he seemed to ponder this statement.

"So, why didn't you come back?"

"I couldn't," Goro insisted with a hint of a plea in his tone. How could he make him understand? How could he explain everything without giving himself away? "Not after what happened. Not until I worked under the radar to clear my name."

"You know things were settled," he protested stubbornly, lips turned downward.

"Only after I made sure of that," Goro said and watched a cargo ship sail by, mind flashing back to his father's ship. He put a hand to his head and squeezed his eyes shut. "Don't you know how hard it was to stay away?"

"Was it?" Ren inquired seriously, doubt filling his tone that tore at Goro's heart. "Was it really?"

Goro's throat tightened to the point where he couldn't answer.

"After Maruki, too, Goro, you just….disappeared again," Ren said, voice quivering once more. He let out a sharp breath and gripped the railing so tight, his knuckles turned white. "Why didn't you come back?"

"You were gone," Goro replied bluntly, not exactly lying, but not answering in a way to avoid the truth. "You went back to your hometown to finish the rest of your second year. I had to re-enroll in school because I had missed so much….there was too much going on."

"I—"

"I settled my affairs," Goro said with a weak sense of finality.

"The real reason," Ren snapped.

"Same reasons," he replied hastily, trying a different tactic, hoping it sounded more like an explanation than an excuse. "After everything—"

"You said you put it behind you," Ren interjected with a hand held up.

Goro exhaled sharply through his nose, laughing humorlessly. Of course he would remember the smallest detail; after Ren had tackled Sumire and reunited with the rest of his Phantom Thieves, Goro finally made his presence known. While the others seemed shocked and even defensive (especially Ryuji), he insisted they shared the same end goal and the feud they had became water under the bridge.

"For the sake of taking Maruki down," Goro said and it was his first lie. Ren must have seen right through it, too, for he scowled. The brunette worked quickly to fix his mistake. "I needed you."

Ren's expression settled.

"I couldn't go from there without you," he whispered, barely audible over the now-howling wind. He bent his head lower and spoke to the ground. "When it was you and me, I felt like the world was ours to take. Maruki didn't seem so...daunting."

"I wasn't sure if you were dead, Goro….if Maruki's distortions only brought you back through my desires," he whispered. "And then you told me you'd die all over again…."

"It's what I wanted you to believe," Goro said with regret. "I thought it would be better if you….stayed away from me. After all I've done to you."

"Do you know how hard that was?" Ren rasped as if he was trying to keep his temper in check. Even if Ren was angry, it did not explain why his voice was shaking so much. "To make that decision even though it meant saying goodbye again?"

He has spent his last few weeks in Tokyo forcing himself to put the memories away and enjoy what little time he had with his friends left before he was forced to return home. But, the moment he had stepped foot in his hometown…his former school, those memories came surging back tenfold.

~FLASHBACK~

Ren put his forehead to his knees, bringing them to his chest as he wrapped his arms around them, biting his tongue so hard it drew blood. He could feel Morgana's soft paw on his foot, but his mind refused to register the present. Tears fell for what it felt like the sixth or seventh time that day, today being worse than others.

"Ren," Morgana mewed softly, nudging his leg with his head. "Ren, we need to go—the station, remember?"

"I can't," he said, voice hoarse and empty. After drying his eyes on his knees, he looked up at his friend with a hollow expression. "I'm sorry."

"Please," Morgana whispered, desperation in his voice. "We need to go."

Ren just stared at the ground, eyes blank. He watched Morgana lash his tail in frustration before he bounded away; he had no energy to chase after the feline as he usually would (followed by some chiding for running away like that) and merely put his face back into his knees.

"Look at that delinquent kid."

"He's always alone, but it's no wonder he hasn't got any friends."

"This school was way better off without him."

"I'm scared to even be in the same room as him. He'll probably snap."

"He should just leave. I mean, everyone wishes he would."

"I heard his own family was glad to kick him out for a year."

"How embarrassing."

Ren had long gotten used to the rumors and nasty commentary; the insults rarely stung anymore, but nothing in his hometown brought him the same pain he had left in Tokyo. He drew up his hood, having abandoned his uniform a while ago, and put his face in his hands, trying to control the tears threatening to spill.

His heart ached. Ren's days had become so mingled, it was impossible to tell when it started and when it ended until it felt like one, long, continuous day. Time, which was meant to heal his wounds, ate away at him, little by little until there was nothing of him left except the memories and the "what-ifs".

"He's so withdrawn."

"I bet he's gonna go to jail."

"No one wants him around."

"No one feels safe with him."

He stifled a cry and hastily dried his eyes.

Ren had lost track of time, unsure of how long he was sitting there. It could have been an hour or it could have been several, but he had no desire to go back home. He looked around—most of the students had left the school's premises, which meant he must have been here for hours. He looked up at the slightly darkening sky and sighed, finally finding the energy to check his phone. But, there were no new messages.

He looked around for his feline friend, but when the cat was still not in sight, Ren had gotten to his feet shakily and started looking for Morgana. He could not fathom where Morgana would go without him, but his mind told him to follow the route to the station. He was so preoccupied with looking around, he did not even notice the person in front of him until he walked right into the body.

He hastily apologized, bowing slightly as he kept his eyes lowered submissively. However, something felt very familiar. He dared to look up and felt his world come to a stop.

Goro was staring at him with those reddish-brown eyes, extending a hand to help straighten him up.

"Akechi…."

"Amamiya," Goro said, voice betraying no emotion. "I was told I could find you here."

Ren saw a blur of black fur before it weaved between his legs.

"I daresay this is a different pace than Tokyo."

The former leader looked to Morgana, eyes seeking some sort of explanation that could be summed up in less than a second.

"Amamiya?"

"I thought…." Ren said but trailed off, not even sure where to start.

"No," Goro replied with a shake of his head, looking at Morgana with a jerk of his chin. "He spotted me at the station and told me where I could find you there."

"That's why I wanted to go so badly," Morgana explained, although he sounded less confident when he realized Ren was not emitting the kind of reaction he was expecting. "I thought it would be good for you to see him."

Goro's eyes fell to the ground as Ren merely stared at him. "Perhaps it was an honest mistake."

Ren wanted to shout to the world, howl his agony to the sky, but he could not even bring himself to move. The boy before him had given him so much grief over the months, Ren was sure his heart no longer worked properly.

After Shido's fall, Ren had lost him without saying goodbye. He watched the barrier slam shut, cutting him off from Goro before he could reach him. He never got the chance to say what he wanted….not in the least, but suddenly it was over. Ren wanted Goro to know….he wanted him to know what he meant to him. Why did everyone else get to confess their true feelings for him but he didn't? Ren's turmoil only worsened when he came back and the world was no longer the one he remembered. Everything had gone wrong, but any will to fix it fell short….not when his world had stopped.

Yet, Maruki's distorted reality brought back the one person that had caused him to lose half his mind. Goro had resurrected and returned to him. It was as if a sliver of his paradise came back and he never wanted to let it go. Ren thirsted for his presence, his company, for those memories to become something more than just memories. He wanted it to be real, but his hope was put out before he could even rekindle it. Ren could not even begin to explain the temptation of accepting Maruki's reality, to give it all up, just to get Goro back.

During his last moments facing the god and Ren wanting and waiting to lie down and sleep, he could hear Goro's voice above the mass's chanting. The simple sound of his voice was enough to shock a will to fight back into Ren because it meant that somewhere, somehow, maybe he was still alive….

It was enough to breathe life back into him.

"Ren," Morgana said, tone riddled with concern.

Ren jolted out of his stupor and looked from Morgana to Goro. Through all those repressed feelings, all he could do was hold out his left hand.

"No, it's good to see you, Akechi."

Goro must have found this strange, but he shook his hand regardless. "I heard you applied to study abroad."

"I don't know if I was accepted…." Ren said and even though he felt himself speaking, his voice sounded far away and so unlike his own.

"When you receive the news, you know where to find me," Goro said knowingly.

~END~

After that minute or two with Goro, Ren felt everything at once, so he made sure he felt nothing at all. When he returned to Tokyo after he and his friends took their summer road trip around Japan, Ren asked to speak with everyone….including Goro after pulling his number up when it had been dormant for so long. He had told his friends he would be joining some on their excursion to study overseas, only to discover Goro would be going, too, like they were going to pick up where they left off.

"That was my mistake," Goro said softly. "But it was a good idea at the time."

"What hurt the most," Ren said, trailing off as he swallowed thickly, only resuming after a few moments of silence. "Was being so close and having so much to say….but having you walk away."

Goro felt himself shrink as he was consumed with guilt, grief, and regret. Everything he had done only hurt Ren; how could he forgive himself?

"Any distance between us never works out in the end," Ren said after a long pause, a small smile—but a smile nonetheless—forming on his face. "I thought you'd learn your lesson the first time."

Goro inhaled shakily, but he felt his lips turning upwards in the faintest of smiles.

"I asked you earlier to try something for me," Ren said, now visibly trembling not just in his hands but all over. "Do you remember?"

Goro nodded, feeling lightheaded. His legs felt like they were struggling to support his weight.

"Don't think," Ren murmured, right hand in his pocket while his left hand came out.

Goro almost missed it over the whistling wind, but he could feel Ren's arm close around his waist, hand resting on his hip. Goro's arm, which seemed to act on its own accord, rested lightly on the other's back. True to his word, he tried not to think about what was happening, and as Ren leaned in, eyes closing, Goro could only blink in mingled shock as the Trickster finally leaned forward and closed the distance.

Eyes fluttering shut, Goro savored the taste of Ren's lips on his own. The surreality made it feel as though this was nothing but a dream of his, but the warmth of Ren's body against his own, shoulders pressed into one another convinced him he was awake. Ren's hand on his hip tightened as his arm drew him closer. Goro's grip on the railing turned vice-like as he burned this feeling into his memory forever.

Ren pulled back first and looked at him shyly, cheeks red. Goro couldn't stop staring, speechless.

"We should head back," the ravenette said after the silence dragged on. "I've got one more place."

Goro spent the entire way home in a complete daze and if someone asked him what happened in that span of time, he would not be able to recount a single detail.

.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Goro had lost track of Ren when he disappeared into his bedroom and never came out. He would have been more upset about being abruptly abandoned, especially after everything that had happened, but he couldn't focus on being upset given everything that happened.

Yusuke greeted him instead; the taller boy gave him a polite nod of his head and rose to his feet, evidently waiting for him on the couch. "Sumire's routine is developing nicely and she asked us all to observe."

"I see," Goro murmured absentmindedly, frowning. "That still does not explain why we needed to dress up for it."

"To make a good impression on her coach," Yusuke replied smoothly and pocketed the keys of their townhouse. He held the door open and beckoned him to the exit. "Let's start with punctuality."

"Clever," Goro muttered.

"A statement worthy of a former adversary's compliments," Yusuke said and flashed him the quickest of smiles. "I'm honored."

Goro snorted but followed the Phantom Thief without trouble. Just down the block, he could see Ryuji waiting with Ann and Morgana, who was now in Ryuji's backpack. The pair of them were talking with their heads bent low and close together. Ryuji's hand rested on her lower back, grinning widely at whatever she was saying.

He felt awkward for interrupting, but they pulled apart rather quickly the moment they saw him and Yusuke approaching from down the street. The faux-blonde ran a hand through his hair as he grinned a bit sheepishly.

"Are we ready?"

"Is all this necessary?" Goro asked sharply, gesturing to Ryuji and Ann's choice of clothing. "It gives off the appearance of desperation to make a good impression."

"Whatever," Ryuji said dismissively, flapping a hand before checking his phone. "Our ride's comin' so suck it up."

Goro couldn't bring himself to come up with a witty response. His fingers brushed his lips unconsciously as his mind reeled back to a few hours prior. What was the meaning? Was there a point? Did he regret it? Where was he? Why didn't he come back? Questions ravaged his mind for the entirety of the ride; he barely remembered getting out of the car and stepping into the foyer of a very fancy restaurant. It was only when someone started speaking that he realized they were most certainly not at a gymnasium nor were they going to watch Sumire's routine.

"Where are we?"

He sounded curt, trying to get Ann's attention as she followed the host to an empty table. When Goro found his seat, he finally was able to steer his thoughts away from Ren long enough to stay in the present.

"What are we doing?" he asked again.

"Happy birthday!" Ann said suddenly, giving him a gracious dip and coming around the table to give him a peck on the cheek.

"Excuse me?" Goro asked, looking down at her with his eyebrows pinched.

"Your birthday, silly," Ann repeated, ignoring Ryuji's sour look.

"Did you forget it was this month?" came a new but familiar voice.

Goro blinked, dumbfounded as he stared at the Phantom Thieves gathered around the table, grinning at him and his expression. Sumire bowed respectfully as she approached the table, Sophia springing behind her happily. His breath hitched and his heart began to pound in his chest, swelling as he tried to keep his jaw from dropping. Now he understood why they were dressed the way they were.

"We gotcha, didn't we?" Ryuji asked, bouncing from his unhappiness and nudging him with his elbow. He, then, set the bag underneath the table and unzipped it so Morgana could pop his head out. "Happy birthday, man. Sorry we missed it!"

"I-I didn't even know you knew," he breathed, barely able to get his voice to work.

Yusuke smiled warmly and put his hand to his chest. "We cannot take all the credit."

All eyes turned to Sumire, who ducked her head as she blushed as red as her hair. Goro never really knew her outside of the Phantom Thieves, so any mentions of his birthday came up blank unless he let it slip in casual conversation. If that were the case, he inwardly applauded her attention to detail.

"It was mostly Sumire's ideas," Ann said and put a hand on her shoulder, giving her a light shake. "She is a great planner."

Goro, once again, found himself looking at her. Whatever he would say surely would not express his gratitude to the fullest. For the first time, he felt like he had real friends. His eyes traveled to each person, but there were still more chairs than occupants.

"Sorry I'm late."

Goro whipped around on his heels. Ren approached him from behind, hands in his pockets and his face adorning this graceful half-smile, a corner of his mouth turned upwards. He looked so whole and different, it was impossible to look away.

Ren bent his head in obeisance and came around to stand at his side.

"Don't you look nice," he murmured in Goro's ear, leaning in so only he could hear.

"Let's eat," Ryuji whined as he grabbed the nearest chair and pulled it out for Ann, who eyed him with fond suspicion. "I'm starvin'."

The others chorused their agreement and sat around the table; the Phantom Thieves were, once again, were able to enjoy each other's company without a hint of antipathy in the air. Ren, stationed between Ann and Sumire, was talking with the two about the food while Ryuji snuck food underneath the table for Morgana, who was poking his head out every once and a while, hidden from view by the white tablecloth.

They had stuffed themselves full of food and were pacing themselves well enough until Ryuji had challenged Yusuke to another chugging contest in which Ryuji ended up spitting soda over the table while Yusuke had it coming out of his nostrils.

"Boys," Ann grumbled unhappily as she tried to salvage her plate.

"That is unsanitary," Sophia added, although her happy tone did not match the context.

After dinner and stuffed full to the brim, the group of friends made their way back to the townhouse, where they could all flop in varying positions in the living room. The AI had merged into Ann's phone to recharge, struggling to function after having eaten so much for the first time in her life. Ryuji and Ann collapsed on the couch, effectively kicking Yusuke off and claiming his legs were too long and took up too much space. He was banished to the smaller armchair instead.

Ren and Goro came in last, but before Goro could make his way to a chair, Ren had grabbed him by the arm and looked to the door. Deciding a certain conversation was long overdue, he nodded in consent and followed him out the back door and onto the patio.

Sharing a smoke break together seemed normal to him now….not as forced as it once felt.

"I need a light."

Goro pulled out his lighter, cupping the flame as Ren stuck the end of his cigarette into the fire, inhaling deeply. Goro beckoned him closer with a finger and bummed off Ren's, the two standing close together but this time it felt different.

Ren took a few long drags from the start, most likely to delay the conversation or whatever he was going to say. Goro wanted to bring himself to say something first, but the words died somewhere in his head.

Finally, he spoke.

"I hope today was good."

Goro looked at Ren and lifted an eyebrow. "Of course."

The ravenette chuckled as he regarded Goro closely, eyes moving up and down his body. "I wanted to talk about earlier."

Goro bit the inside of his cheek, scared to hear what was coming next.

"I didn't mean to pressure you," he said simply, which was anticlimactic. "I just wanted to see if you really were doing what I asked. Please….don't think too much of it."

How could he not?

Yet, he nodded.

"I….okay," Ren said and plastered a smile on his face, giving Goro's hand a reassuring squeeze. "It's getting late and we're all pretty exhausted."

He didn't even give Goro time to answer before he was tossing out his cigarette and heading back inside. All he could do was watch the other's retreating back disappear behind the door.

This time, he had no control over the conversation.