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That Feeling Missed

Monday—July 13, 2021

"Are you going to keep ignoring me?" Ren inquired.

Goro felt a growl rise in his throat as he clenched his hands into fists, staring at the ravenette sitting too casually in a chair for his own good.

It had been another week since their visit to the Velvet Room, but Goro refused to talk about the events that took place there. He had grown to detest it despite its beauty. He could feel Ren's agitation rising as quickly as his own, but he wanted him to understand it was a little more convoluted than the credit he was giving.

"No one remembers it like we do," Ren said impatiently before he finally let a crack in his calm composure visible. "I need your help. I'm shooting in the dark and I need to make this right."

"You're looking for Yaxley, right?" Goro said, letting his defenses drop a hint. He uncrossed his arms from his chest and let his hands drop to his sides, gloved fingers flexing as if they were itching to do something. "Have you tried tapping into the database at the District?"

"Do you really think I know how?" he snorted in disbelief.

"What about Futaba?" Goro pressed, going for his mug of coffee. "Have you spoken to her?"

"I haven't, no," Ren said with a shake of his head, looking displeased at the idea. He let out a weary sigh and muttered under his breath. "We need to do this the right way. I've already got enough guilt on my conscience."

"We've been playing 'find the needle in the haystack' for nearly a month," Goro pointed out blatantly.

"I know, I know…."

"We need a plan before we go in."

"Okay, yeah…."

"And we need some backup," Goro said with a sense of finality, cupping his chin thoughtfully.

"Who?"

.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.~.

Goro had never given much thought about the size of Mementos, but as travelled around the alternate reality airport, he was beginning to regret his generosity and agreeing to accompany Ren on this meaningless goose-chase. Even Sumire was growing fatigued and she was always far too chipper when it was the three of them. He bit back his desire to call it quits and continued to follow Ren around the gates.

"Look at that," the redhead said softly and walked over to the window, eyes narrowing as she peered out through the glass. "Have you ever seen anything like it?"

Goro stared out the window and up at the clear, blue sky—much like the one in the real world today. He watched airplanes lift off and land, rolling up to the gates as people came and went. It truly was America's melting pot.

"No, it's never so closely resembled the real world," Ren breathed as he pressed his forehead against the cool barrier, taking a deep breath as he closed his eyes for a moment or two.

"Perhaps because the link between the two is less," Goro suggested, but held up a hand mostly to stop himself from hypothesizing when they had better things to do. "Where would a side-character of an infamous criminal be lurking?"

It was a question he had been asking himself for the past few weeks now, but he was still coming up short with answers. Goro's deep train of thought was interrupted when he felt an intense heat on his right, nearly catching his arm on fire as Ren's blue fire spiraled around his arms. He was about to retort when his voice died somewhere in his chest.

"So that's what it's like without your coat," Sumire giggled as she looked at Goro's gaping expression. "I always wondered what you look like without it."

"Why?" Ren asked, giving her a bit of a weird look.

"Moving on," Goro said pointedly, watching another airplane land. "I—"

"Let's just….rest," Sumire said and put a hand on his to stop his rambling. She blinked up at him with those pleading eyes. "There are no Shadows around and we could all benefit from a break."

"She isn't wrong," Ren said fairly and eyed the vending machine. "I'm sure it works like the ones in the real world."

He ventured over to it, but it only had a single button. He shrugged his shoulders as Sumire looked at him with curiosity and pressed it. Three phials came spilling out, nearly shattering on the ground if Goro had not caught them. He straightened up and held them up at eye-level.

"Is it bad?" Sumire asked quizzically. "We don't exactly know this Mementos."

"No way of knowing for sure," Ren said earnestly and held up a hand. "One of you has a Revival Bead. Use it if I need it."

"Joker?"

"Senpai—"

Ren tipped the phial to his lips and swallowed a mouthful of what tasted like nothing. For a few seconds, he merely stood there as if contemplating some great philosophical question. Goro was about to open his mouth, when he noticed goosebumps pop up over Ren's skin. The other must have noticed, for she even made to take off her jacket for him, but Ren stopped her.

"I'm okay," he said.

"You're so reckless, senpai," Sumire chided. "You're shivering!"

Goro grunted; this boy was impulsive and reckless—a dangerous combination, but he couldn't bring himself to be too angry about it. He walked over and began rubbing his hands up and down Ren's bare arms, which felt cold to the touch.

"It's getting better," Ren said earnestly as he flexed his fingers. "I feel great actually."

"What?" Sumire balked.

"Really excellent...really."

She looked taken aback, but she looked at the phial in her hand. Goro put his faith and trust in Ren and downed the contents in one sip. The liquid, itself, felt too thick to be water and cool on the tongue, like he was drinking gooey ice. The cold seeped through his bones, soaking his muscles and taking away the heat and pain. He moved his arms cautiously, but the achiness and soreness were gone.

"It's a restorative drink," Goro murmured curiously, almost in awe. "I would have never thought…."

Sumire was the last to take it, but after a few moments, she smiled as the effects became noticeable. She tightened the tie around her hair and nodded approvingly, clapping her hands together as if preparing herself for the next battle. Goro turned to the Leader and fixed him with a look.

"What now?"

"Rest," he said and gestured to the seats facing the window. "We have a ways back and we won't be sure what we'll run into."

Sumire took a seat first and folded her legs neatly at the knee, propping herself up with an elbow on the armest. She put her chin in her hand and looked pensive as she stared at the scenery.

"What is it?" the Trickster asked.

"Look at us," Sumire said though her eyes never strayed. "And where we are now. Just a few months ago we were in Japan….disbanded, what I thought was, for good. "

She shook her head in disbelief. "And now we have half our members in a foreign country together, fighting the same enemy as before. Is there a finish line?"

"It's surreal, yes," Goro found himself saying before he had time to stop himself. He sat down beside her and rubbed his forehead wearily. "And repetitive, but there will come a time when you realize the power you hold—to change one's heart is a power over another that you will come to appreciate."

Ren looked at him but Goro ignored the face he had given him and let his hand drop to his lap.

"And maybe that alone will be worth it to you one day."

Sumire sunk lower in her chair and crossed her arms over her chest, sounding unsure. "What about Oracle?"

"She had her reasons for joining in the first place, Violet," Ren repeated and gestured to the sky above them. "We all do but what we started in Japan and why….it happens everywhere. That's why I keep doing it."

"So someday, well just...lose this all regardless?" Sumire asked, sounding discouraged. She slowly removed her mask and rubbed the corners of her eyes. "How is that motivation?"

"Because of the differences you're making now."

"Enough," Goro said suddenly, rising to his feet as he threw her a bit of a glare. "We don't have time to constantly keep reassuring you. If they were the case, I would put the title therapist before my surname and make a salary off it. We have more pressing matters at hand."

"Crow…." Ren protested softly, rising to his feet with a frown.

"No, he's right," Sumire said and waved a hand at herself. "I waste too much time whining. I should be more focused."

Goro grunted, having whatever patience he had left dissipate. He was tired of playing the Mother role for this too-old child, regretting only not saying something sooner. He sighed and let his shoulder sag at the thought of having to walk back to where they started. He was no longer tired physically, but he was mentally drained.

Admittedly, the last thing on his mind were Shadows, so when he came across one, he was unprepared. Ren seized him around the waist and yanked him back to keep him from getting hit. Goro hissed and drew out his gun, sending a few bullets at the body to provoke it into its real self.

"You're true form!" Ren declared as she shot a bullet through its left eye.

The Shadow groaned and contorted itself until a Maara came slithering out from its disguise. The green mass jerked and swayed awkwardly as it opened its gasped mouth, red tongue lolling out. Sumire unsheathed her sword and pointed it at the creature, eyes flashing.

"Let's dance."

"She twirled on her feet and threw her mask in the air, calling upon her Persona with a flair. Cendrillon emerged with a twist and raised her glowing hand.

"Kouga, my Persona!"

Cendrillon threw out an arm and blasted the Maara with a bedazzling light, twirling gracefully when she finished.

"Crow?"

Goro looked at her in surprise and accepted the hand she had extended for him. He called upon a Persona of his own and sent a shower of light on the Maara.

"Back up!"

Goro saw it exactly as Ren cried out; he threw himself in front of Sumire and turned his back to the explosion as Goro threw his arms up to block his face. The Shadow's outburst blew the seats from the floor and sent them flying in all directions, including theirs.

The Detective winced as one hit Ren in the back, but he remained unflinching. Ren took Sumire by the arm and pushed her back, yanking out his phone with haste. Goro crouched low as another piece of loose debris from the explosion whisked over his head.

"Get us out!" he shouted.

Ren activated the MetaNav, which began warping the world immediately. Goro let out a breath of relief as he felt the familiar bucket of cool water douse him when they returned to the real world. He sighed and looked around to find them exactly where they had left—in the corner of a tiny alleyway behind a pile of construction supplies and traffic cones.

"Thank you, senpai," Sumire gasped and bowed gratefully.

"No problem," Ren panted and ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head. "I'm sorry we didn't get much done."

"That's not how I see it, Ren," Sumire said gently and put a hand over his, gripping it tightly. "We don't say it often, but we want you to know we're behind you. We are."

Ren bit his lip as he waited for the light to turn, listening to the mingled conversations and watching people live in their own little worlds. New York City at night was absolutely breathtaking and for once, Ren wanted to take the time to appreciate the beauty it had to offer. It reminded him strongly of Tokyo, but this city had much more variety to offer than his home. Truly, the world was a beautiful place and the people in it that made the world so unique—it was hard to remember that sometimes.

For once, he just wanted to appreciate the fact he was in New York because that alone was such a treat.

Short chapter, but I'll get things moving along.