A/N: Takes place shortly after the last review episode, with the movie-licensed game Bebe's Kids for the SNES.

In this fourty-fifth review episode, team RWBY covers the second of two game reviews for the SNES per their attorney friend Athena Cykes' request, which is another movie-licensed game based on the 1980's John Landis comedy masterpiece The Blues Brothers.

BEACON
9:10 PM

After reviewing the SNES movie-licensed game Bebe's Kids, which ended up in a disaster after finding that the game's time limit ruined their experience, team RWBY decided to move on to the other game Athena had requested them to review, which is another movie-licensed game on the SNES based on a much better film, The Blues Brothers.

However, ten minutes after booting the game up on the SNES, team RWBY had a hard time playing through the Blues Brothers game, resulting in a ferocious fit when playing it.

Once they stopped playing, Ruby calmed, "Well, I guess that means we're gonna review the other game Athena has requested us to cover up, besides that god-awful Bebe's Kids game. How about a video game that really pisses us THE FUCK OFF THIS TIME?!", exclaiming this angrily as she continued, "Well...waste no time beating around the bush. Let's just take a look at the game that's based on a comedy masterpiece known as Blues Brothers."

Team RWBY's Game Commentary of Blues Brothers (SNES)

"But as of nowadays, people like to call this game as AN UNHOLY DICKSTORM OF SHIT CHEESE! By the gods, it's awful. The worst thing to be associated with the movie besides Blues Brothers 2000. We're sorry, but we had to go there. The original is still as comedically masterful as it is.", Yang verdicted next.

Blake and Weiss prepares, "What makes this game so horrible? What makes you want to give yourself OVARY SURGERY WITH A SPATULA?", settling down and sighing, "Well, I'm sure inquiring minds want to know. Let's take a look at...the Blues Brothers game.", before they restart the SNES cartridge and the game after saying this.

Blues Brothers (SNES)

"First of all, just look at the Blues Brothers. Yeah, they got their basic likeness down, but when did the Blues Brothers fucking smile? Would you think the Blues Brothers were cool if they walked around everywhere like that?", examined the tomboyish leader of team RWBY, "Well, I guess we gotta pick one of these guys; so let's go ahead and pick Elwood.", she then says when Elwood in the game disappears behind a jukebox in the game's select screen as they heard 'Rock-rock-rock-rock and roll!', "Really? That's his battle cry? Sounds like Fozzie Bear if he was trying to go all metal, going 'Wocka-wocka-wocka-wocka-wock and roll!'"

The elder sister of Ruby Rose states, "So, as you can see, we begin with Stage 1 and...", before the game starts in the first level as it had spikes and rotating platforms whilst taking place in a location different from the film, "Oh, yeah. Oh, this is exactly like the fucking movie. Yeah, with the spikes, the rotating platforms, it being set in the fucking forest... It's literally like watching the film!", and responds when they come across bees in the game as they start progressing, "Oh, look at that. Giant killer bees. Remember that from the movie?", and then with a chained spiky ball, "Oh, hey, a giant spiky ball on a chain! Remember THAT from the movie?"

"What part of Chicago do you think this is supposed to be, Millennium Park? Hell, they got faces that shoot water at you, and that's not as strange as this shit!", the Faunus commented, "Let's see. You gotta get to a jukebox and...", as team RWBY activates the jukebox very soon in the first level but realize it's a signification for the end of the level, "What, that's it? That's the end of the level? That's, like, the shortest stage we've ever played.", and then tells as they showed the timer in the game, "Look, the clock starts off at 99 seconds, and we finish at 84. That's 15 seconds. 15 SECONDS! The time it takes to put the game in the system takes longer than that!"

The Schnee heiress continued, "Okay, so after defeating that "epic" first stage, you move on to the second stage where you fight...possessed killer lawnmowers.", then sighed before asking, "What exactly IS the story of the game anyway? We mean, it doesn't give you a backstory, it just sort of tosses you in the middle of everything.", before she pauses the game as she told, "Hold on, we're just gonna check the instruction book, because we gotta know what kind of story has a possessed killer lawnmower in it."

In a moment, team RWBY grabs the game's instruction manual, as Weiss and Ruby exchange looks with the former indicating for Ruby to read.

"Okay...", Ruby said before taking a deep breath, "The Blues Brothers are back to play the blues. On the way to their first concert. "First concert, they encounter a jukebox and decide to listen to some good music. But as soon as they approach it, they get trapped by the evil machine! Finding a way out will take the Blues Brothers through the sewers, warehouses, and the suburbs of many large cities. Can Jake and Elwood escape from the hungry jukebox and reach Chicago in time for the greatest concert of all time?"

Team RWBY, after reading the manual, look at each other in puzzlement.

The red-haired tomboy asked, "Okay, first of all, when they mentioned 'first concert', they're likely a little-known, startup band. Second, are they in the jukebox, or are they in the city? Because we don't know that many cities that have spikes on the ground and possessed killer lawnmowers! Well, maybe parts of Cicero, but even then, that's a big stretch! And lastly, to answer that last question from the manual if Jake and Elwood could reach Chicago in time... Not if they keep feeding us this bullshit story."

"Okay, so the idea of each level is to reach the jukebox before the time runs out, which almost never happens because each level is, like, a minute long at most. We don't even get it. You're in a jukebox, but there's a jukebox inside the jukebox? How are you gonna get OUTSIDE the jukebox if you keep going INSIDE the jukebox? Very confusing!", explains Yang on the level design, "Well, your main weapon is a bunch of records you collect to throw them at ease. Yeah, it's like that Aerosmith game, Revolution X. I wouldn't mind so much, except they always make this obnoxious sound every time you collect a record."

Blake contemplated when they heard a 'Yeah!' sound byte every time they collected a record, "It sounds like someone hit Sam Kinison in the balls every time you get one of those.", resuming the game onto the next level as Elwood in the game comes across a cake which powers him up into a muscle builder, "If you eat one of these cakes, you suddenly become Arnold Schwarzenegger. Yeah, I'm sure he'd be happy to know that this game is encouraging that eating sweets turns you into a muscle builder.", then saying, "You jump on mushrooms, throw records and shit; but there's a LOT of things about this game that don't make sense.", addressing, "We know. Imagine. But we're talking about the gameplay itself."

"For example, when you start off the game, you have 100 of these records to throw. Which makes it kinda pointless to collect more for the fifteen seconds of gameplay you have, but whatever.", exampled Weiss as they showed the record counter on the game screen's stat window before she continued the game, "Nevertheless, we start the next level; and then, we're suddenly down to fifty. What the hell? Where'd the rest of my records go?", as team RWBY advances to the third level despite this whilst playing, "Okay, whatever, we still got fifty and a ton more to collect; that still ain't bad. Look at all of these we're getting at the end of this level. We're gonna have plenty in the next one."

But the gameplay experience starts to turn ugly as when team RWBY plays through the next couple levels, they eventually see they do not have any records left by the time they reached Level 6 where there were chains in a dark atmosphere.

The red-haired huntress exasperated, "What the FUCK?! YOU STOLE ALL OUR RECORDS, you fucktard! Why? You gave them to us before! W-w-why the hell did you give us all of those records at the end of the last level if you're just gonna take them away anyway? What did you think we're gonna do with those records before we end the friggin' level? You think I'm gonna listen to them? That would actually make sense, but you're not allowed to! So it's entirely pointless!", while another thing pops in her mind about this part, "Oh, and just to make things more annoying, remember when they handed these things out like candy before, you couldn't get enough of them? In this level, they don't give you any until halfway through. You have no control over how many of these you can keep. You're totally at the mercy of the crazy programmers who...randomly decide when you can defend yourself or not. And that wouldn't be too bad if, you know, the fucking CONTROLS were easy to use."

"First of all, every floor in his game is like ice. Look how much you slide every time you try to stop.", proves the blonde huntress as they sampled how the playable characters in the game slides across the platform they're standing on after stopping, "You have to account for that every time you jump a platform. And sometimes they don't even give you time to adjust! Just when you thank God that you finally didn't slip off and die...", also showing what's said happens as they lose a life once falling to an electric barrier, "Whoop! Down you go, fucker! Damn it! What, did he go skating in butter before he started this magical fuckquest?", remarking the next thing, "And the second thing is: the chains. These fucking goddamn chains. Now, we know what you're thinking: 'What's so hard about climbing a chain? All you have to do is push 'up,' right?' No. You have to be at the exact point to climb these things. You have to push up at the exact moment you hit that chain, not a second later or a second earlier. And even then, just like the floors, you can easily slip off."

The black-haired huntress asked irritably, "Who designed it that way? If I wanna go up, just let me go frigging up!", who then said, "Y'know, what the fuck kind of factory is this, anyway? All I ever see in this place is fucking chains and boxes. They're really putting up electric shocks to protect chains and boxes? Priorities in this magical jukebox world are pretty fucked up.", while they kept playing as Elwood jumps onto boxes and almost slid off, "Look how close we were to falling off there. It's like they're trying to give you wiggle room to move around on the chain. Where the hell are we gonna go except for up or down?", before they try to grab the chain whilst playing but end up losing another life when Elwood in the game falls to a electric barrier, "DAMN IT!", as the Faunus and her teammates berated as they kept dying from the same hazards in the game, "Dammiiit! Fucking chains!"

"Look at this level.", noticed the white-haired huntress as they had 57 seconds left to complete the level they're in, "They give you less time than usual. God, this one must go by real fast.", rushing as she and her teammates try to beat the level by climbing chains and trying to get the dog in the game to leave in order for Elwood to get past the upcoming hazards in the level as time was running out, "Come on, you fucking dog, MOVE! We only have sixteen seconds!", but the girls unfortunately were unable to beat the level as the timer runs out and another life was lost, "FUCK!", before the Schnee heiress overreacted, "I swear this game is a sadist of expectations. It gives you a bunch of time, it takes it away!"

Ruby commented, "By the gods, why would they give you such little time when part of it is just waiting for these dogs to move? Not counting me and Yang's beloved Zwei in the mix though. He's so cute!", as she decided for the moment being as time was about to run out before they could advance in the game, "Fuck it, we don't care. We're gonna just accept our fate in the moment of this level. Hey, it's better than giving the satisfaction of thinking we give a crap... which, of course, we don't. That's why we're trying desperately to be so FUCKING CALM!", placating themselves soon after, "So, after you finally get past that level, you get to go outside the factory in Stage 11. It's still a factory; but, fuck it, at least, you're outside. Then after that, you go into another forest in Stage 12. Well, good. Maybe we're finally moving away from that whole fucking factory thing-", and then suddenly get disappointed when they find out Stage 13 takes place in the factory yet again, "GODDAMN IT! We are so sick of this place!"

"Wouldn't they close down these factories due to safety hazards?", Yang asked as they noticed the serpent circling around the player in the stage, "Oh, what's this thing, a flying snake? Yeah. Why not? We wouldn't expect anything else out of an everyday factory in an everyday magic jukebox. So what the hell are we supposed to do with it? It just sorta nudges me; it doesn't really kill me. I guess we can grab it; but when we throw it, it just comes back again.", but then finds out they can ride the snake in the game, "Oh, we RIDE it. Well, OK, this should be a lot of fun, it is kind of a cool idea, and-", and suddenly when they hit a corner, Elwood falls off the snake and thus loses a life for the players; "Oh, fuck you- If we touch anything, we fall?! What a load of BITCH! OK, this wouldn't be too bad. It really wouldn't- Except... Look at it!"

Blake describes the stationary animation when Elwood rides the snake, "We mean, this is me when we're keeping it still! It's always moving! It's incredibly hard to control. Everywhere we go, it tries to fight us or knock us off! It literally tries to head toward the nearest platform to make you fall. And... LOOK AT THIS SHIT I gotta maneuver through!", as she and her teammates showed a portion of the stage which had electric hazards once again, "Are you fucking kidding me?!", before more moments of team RWBY's efforts to control Elwood riding the snake and then falling off at times had them saying, "Shit! SHIT! SHEE-YAT!", with the Faunus criticizing, "This thing is impossible. It's honest-to-God like trying to ride a real fucking dragon. I guess we should congratulate the game for trying to be true of life, except that it's a FUCKING FLYING DRAGON! CUT ME SOME SLACK!", whilst they try to manuever around the electric barriers in the game but end up failing at times, "Okay, easy... easy... Easy-GOOOOOD-DAMMIT!"

"Oh, we like this.", said Weiss when they witness Elwood in the game now being stuck that he can't hit the platform above him, "Obviously, there's no way to get on it without touching some sort of platform; so either way, we're dead. It's really a shame that this thing is... fucking allergic to walls!", disgruntling, "Yeah, come on. I don't like this any more than you do, bitchasaurus, just COME ON!", as another time had Elwood being thrown off the snake and losing yet another life, "GOD... We can't believe how long this is taking! It'd be easier just to find a real snake and actually make him fly!", questioning for a moment, "The hell is this thing anyway?", before deciding, "Let me see what it says in the instruction book this time.", and saying this before she read in the instruction manual again "Snake: a friendly creature; you can jump on its back and control it."

"Does the Snake in the game actually look remotely friendly to you?", the leader of team RWBY and her elder sister, Ruby and Yang, questioned; "Does it act like it's friendly? If it's so friendly, how come he's always trying to knock us off and push us down every chance he gets?", before testing the level many more times, one instance having Elwood fall off and become temporarily safe on the edge of the electrical hazard, "DAAH! Oh, hey-" but then falling off and losing a life, "DAAAAHH! DAMMIT!"

The Faunus and the heiress, Blake and Weiss try the level again as another instance has Elwood standing only for the snake to push him off slightly and causes another lost life, "What?! He pushed us! HE FUCKING PUSHED US! FRIENDLY CREATURE, MY ASS! NOTHING IN THIS GAME IS FRIENDLY! THIS IS SHIT! IT'S ALL SHIT! ONE BIG, STINKING, FUCKING PILE OF FUCK-SHIT!", before the four teammates eventually see the Game Over screen, or as the game puts it 'Concert Over', "Oh, "Concert Over?" WE'LL SAY IT AS IT IS, THEN!"

The four teammates finally give up on the game then shut down the SNES and took out the Blues Brothers game cartridge from the console, removed the console from the TV, grabbed both game cartridges of Blues Brothers and Bebe's Kids, stormed out of their dorm room, walked down the hallway, and knocked on the dorm Athena, Maka and their friends are staying in for the social event.

Athena answers and opens the door, meeting with team RWBY, "Hey, girls. We were getting ready to go to bed, how was-"

"Horrible!", Team RWBY said in unison as they handed Athena her SNES and the game cartridges back, before the four of them were making their way back to their dorm.

The orange-haired attorney simply said, "What did I tell you?", acknowledging their experience as similar as hers when it came to bad games, before she resumes back to the dorm and closes the door.

Once Team RWBY settles back down in their dorm, Ruby had the honors of concluding the game review.

"We're sorry, we couldn't review any more of that shit.", said Ruby in conclusion, "We mean, that game is terrible! That is a god-awful game! It has nothing to do with the movie, the...floors made of Crisco, the controls are insane, IT IS TERRIBLE! It's a TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE game! And we pity the poor suckers who ever come ACROSS this game and TRY to play it!"

Team RWBY then heard another knock on their door again, as the four went to open it.

It was Rachel, a friend of Miria's.

"Hey, girls. What happened?", Rachel said, wondering.

Ruby greeted, "Oh. Hey, Rachel. We just finished two awful game reviews on Bebe's Kids and Blues Brothers, both based on movies. They just ticked us off, you know?"

"Yeah...", Rachel said, putting one hand on the back of her head, "Sorry to hear that."

Yang asked, "What's up?"

"I just wanted to inform you that my friend Miria, Celty and Mika are open to reviewing a movie with you tomorrow if possible, both you and Yang?", said Rachel to Ruby.

Blake and Weiss relieved, "At last."

"We won't mind. Thank you for letting us know, though.", the leader of team RWBY smiled.

The dirty-blonde freelancer replied, "No problem.", as she closed the door after this.

A moment afterwards, the red-black-haired huntress says, "I'm Ruby..."

"...I'm Yang..."

"...I'm Blake..."

"...and I'm Weiss."

"And...may we have mercy.", team RWBY simply told before they go start getting ready for bed.

End of Team RWBY's Game Commentary of Blues Brothers (SNES)

Up Next: Ruby Rose, Yang Xiao Long, Miria Harvent, Mika Harima and Celty Sturluson's Commentary of Bloodrayne (2005)