2. Standing out in the Crowd
I was overcome by the pain of losing him all over again and once again found myself crying over Tailer…..
The next thing I heard was my father's booming voice from downstairs and I realised it was morning
"Gabi, Becka? Wake Up! You'll be late for school!" Glancing at the clock it was half-past six, our first day at Forks High School. As I got up and dressed and headed downstairs, I checked my phone seeing a message from Tai that read:
"Despite the challenges that you may be faced with today, I will always be here for you! No matter what you may face in your life I will ALWAYS be here for you. Through the good and the bad, I will always love you till death do us part! Everything that you go through remember I am here, and I love you! Lots of Love forever Tai."
Even though I had cried myself to sleep the night before, I felt the same thing happening where I stood holding my phone. (Conveniently in front of our mirror in the bathroom) glancing at myself I sighed and headed downstairs followed by Gabi rather reluctantly also.
"Becka? You Ok?" asked Dad as Gabi and I neared the bottom of the stairs heading to the kitchen for breakfast as he was leaving conveniently for work.
"Yeah! I'm fine, just didn't get much sleep last night!" I said with a reassuring smile.
"Ok, well have fun at school girls and I'll see you when I get home ok? Love you! Bye!" he called as he shut the door behind him.
"You were talking in your sleep last night Becka, did you and Tai have a fight? You sounded angry and upset with him last night!" Gabi mentioned as we too headed out the door after a hurried breakfast.
"Um, no he's thinking about persuading his folks to move up here so that we can 'pick up where we left off' it sounded ok last night but the more I thought about it now, the more I think that it's a bad idea. I don't want him sacrificing his families' happiness for me. I love him but I want what's best for him and now I think that's to stay in Phoenix, it would be too depressing for him here!" I said more to myself than Gabi as we locked the door and headed for my truck well our truck that Dad had given us as a "Home coming present" which was conveniently re-built by Jacob and Dad brought it off Billy.
"Yeah! You've got a point there maybe we should plan for them to come here for a weekend so that we can sort this out! I hate talking to Ben about that sort of thing over the phone!" said Gabi as we arrived at school quicker than I had hoped.
"We'll discuss this later Gabs, when we're at home, let's get this over and done with!" I said a few minutes later after glancing around the parking lot for some time.
Gabi and I held hands as more of a comfort thing we always did in this situation, as we headed towards the school office.
As we were walking I noticed that people were staring, and by people I mean guys.
Great I thought to myself more unwanted attention from the opposite gender, another Jacob all over again.
"Ok, deep breathe Gabs and in we go!" I said opening the door to the office and waiting for my sister who was busy staring at a group of five teenagers in the parking lot and didn't hear me.
"Gabi? Move! Please!" I said pushing her into the office and leading her to the desk.
"Sorry, they just caught my attention that's all!" she said as we reached the desk.
"Can I help you ladies?" asked a caramel haired lady with a strange pale white heart shaped face with two small dimples on either side, she was standing in the corner next to the photocopier.
"Yes, I'm Rebecka and this is my sister Gabriella, we're er Chief Shaw's daughters!" I said embarrassed at how easy it was to say after all these years.
"Certainly, I have your paperwork here, just give me a moment or two please!" she said leaving the machine and coming back near the front door to begin searching through the paperwork on the desk.
"I hope you don't have too much trouble finding your way around, would you like a map?" she asked smiling.
"No thank you, I think we'll be fine, it looks easy enough!" said Gabi smiling back and accepting her items.
"Please bring this slip back this afternoon!" she said handing me an extra paper with both our names on it.
"Good Luck!" she said as she made her way to the door and held it open for us.
"Thank you!" Gabi and I both said in unison.
"Well ok that was weird!" said Gabi glancing down at the paper she had in her hand.
"We have English first that should be fun!" I said now glancing at my own timetable.
"Awesome!" Gabi replied with a little more enthusiasm than I would have thought necessary.
"Hi, er you're Gabriella and Rebecka aren't you?" asked a blonde-haired spectacled boy as he was passing where we stood not far from the office.
"Um, yes and you are?" Gabi asked trying not to sound rude.
"Oh, sorry I'm Mike, Mike Newton and these are my friends Mitch, Jaqi, Eric and Jess!" he said pointing to each person as he said their names.
"Where's your first class?" asked the boy named Eric
"English!" I said trying my best to sound friendly.
"Awesome! I'll show you where to go if you like?" said the guy by the name of Mitch.
"Um, thanks!" said Gabi smiling and dragging me to follow the group heading towards what looked like block 3.
"Mr Mansen! Two new students Sir!" said the boy by the name of Eric as we reached the teacher who was standing writing at the blackboard. (They still used Blackboard's here wow!)
"I'm Rebecka, this is Gabriella!" I said pointing to myself then my sister.
"Right Gabriella, you can sit here with Miss Stanley and Rebecka you can sit here with Miss Weber! Girls I expect you to help them catch up please!" He said motioning us to sit down where he put our books that he had in his hands. Sitting down where he pointed I turned to the person by the name of Angela.
"Hi, I'm Rebecka! Are you Angela?" I asked politely trying to sound friendly.
"Yes, I am and that's your sister Gabriella?" she asked smiling and pointing to the page where we were meant to be in our studies.
"Page 245! Miss Weber what is the answer to question 6?" Mr Mansen asked pointing to Angela.
"This relationship between Romeo and Juliet is at the breaking point when Paris turns up." replied Angela briefly smiling at me.
Great! Romeo and Juliet! Gabi and I had studied this almost every single year for the past two years. How fun, I just hoped that we don't have watch it anytime soon the whole romantic issues were touchy for both of us now which made things awkward.
"Miss Shaw the answer to question 9?" Came Mr Masen voice from somewhere in front of me.
"Er, Romeo murdered himself via poison and Juliet followed shortly after waking up?" I asked more confidently aware that I had been day dreaming. I now remembered that this was why I didn't like English.
"Okay review for homework and write an essay about the relationship that stands out to you, describe the strength of the relationship and the things you think make them the way they are!" Mr Mansen said to the class twenty minutes later as the bell sounded and I placed my books into my bag.
"What do you have next?" asked Angela as I took my timetable out of my bag quickly before replacing it.
"Biology, block 6!" I said smiling
"Oh, I have Government next!" she said rather disappointed
"I'm sure we'll have some more classes together; I have French I think it's fifth!" I said as we meet Gabi outside the door.
"Yeah I hope so, it was nice to meet you Becka!" Angela said waving to Gabi and I as her, Jessica, Eric, and Mike headed towards what looked like the lockers.
"Did you have fun Becks?" asked Gabi as we followed them.
"No! You know I hate Romeo and Juliet; I can't believe we're studying it again!" I said complaining.
"Becks, (sigh) you know each school has a different er curriculum basis! We're just gonna have deal with it! I mean come on; you know that you'll ace it anyway. Each time we do this you always complain and then you end up beating everyone anyway!" Gabi said.
"I know Gabi, but I'm just pointing out a fact." sighing I change the subject.
"I might call Tai at lunch! We need to sort this out, once and for all! I need him in my life Gabs and if that means that it can be nothing more than friends then so be it, but I NEED him so much, more than I've realized. I'm still head-over heels for him Gabi!" I said looking at her desperate for her to understand what I was trying to say.
"I know Becks, calm down, it's how I feel about Ben too although I'm not so sure that I can agree to letting him go like you seem to be able to do with Tai!" she said hugging me as she directed me towards our next class.
"Yeah but I mean a weekend up here Becks, it means saying (sighs shakily) goodbye all over again. I don't know if I can take that Becka I love him, I can't let him go all over again, I realized that last night when he told me he was still in love with me, and that he didn't want anyone else but me!" Gabi said as we walked into the class.
"After class Gabs!" I said as we walked up to the teacher's desk.
"Excuse me, my name's Rebecka and this is my sister Gabriella we're the Shaw twins." I said handing the teacher the slip.
"Right, here are your things! Miss Cullen would you be so kind as to move to the spare desk at the ah no Mr Hale, you can stay there thank you! Gabriella would you take this seat next to Mr. Cullen and Rebecka the seat next to Miss Cullen down the back!" he said passing me back the slip and motioning us to our designated seats.
"See you!" I said reluctantly heading down the back of the classroom away from my sister.
"Hello! I'm Alice, You're Rebecka aren't you?" as I sat down I realized that my father must have been talking about us behind our back and using the names we didn't like.
"Um yes, but I prefer Becka!" I said smiling at her she was a simple yet pretty person, her hair all spiky, she had a pixie look about her.
Her pale white skin, her golden-brown eyes made me think that there was something more there but before I could act on that Mr. Singapore called the class to order.
I smile reading the overview for the term, we had already learnt this (sighs) another boring class.
Gabi looked like she was just as board as I felt I decided to try and start a conversation with this strange girl, Alice Cullen who looked like a decent person, possibly she could be a friend…
"So, have you always lived in Forks?" I asked trying to sound interested.
"No, I moved down here about two years ago but I love Forks it's my kind of town. How are you liking Forks, is it fun living with your Dad?" She asked smiling.
"Um, well it's cold and wet which makes me miss Phoenix, living with my Dad well that's just embarrassing!" I said looking slightly apologetic and embarrassed.
"That sounds about right!" Alice said smiling again before glancing back up at the teacher.
"Is that your sister Gabriella next to my brother?" Alice asked pulling my attention once again out of my day dream.
"Um, yes but she prefers Gabi." I said smiling slightly as Gabi turned around as I spoke.
"After class can you introduce me?" she asked eagerly, turning away from the Hale boy who looked...upset; was the only word to describe it.
"I think she would like that!" I said curiously glancing at the teacher before turning to look at the other two Cullen's in the room well the Hale and the Cullen.
"Interesting, he likes being the only brainiac in the class; looks like Gabi might be some competition...this might be a good change for him." She replied pretending not to be surprised.
"Is Edward the type of person who hates loosing things like this?" I asked trying not to sound too interested but I was, I was interested in this boy sitting next to my sister, the way she looked at him and he at her it was worse than the way she used to look at Ben oh please God don't let it be that same look.
"Read pages 200-289 for homework please!" Mr Singapore called as the bell rung for the end of class.
"So, are you going to introduce me to your sister?" asked Alice as we both stood and collected our books.
"Um sure, Gabi can you come here please?" I called looking slightly worried she walked towards where I stood with Alice.
"Hi! I'm Alice, this is Jasper and that's my brother Edward who so rudely ran out of the room." she said smiling at Gabi and I rather awkwardly.
"It's nice to meet you both!" Gabi answered politely.
"Um, would you excuse us please?" I asked grabbing Gabi's arm as we reached the door.
"Sure, I'm sure we'll see each other around, in a town this small." Alice said with a smile turning and walking in the opposite direction.
"She seems nice doesn't she?" I asked Gabi walking towards block 6 which unfortunately was the gym.
"Um, yeah she does… Becka, I got a text message from Ben before, he wants to know what time our lunch break is, it's kind of worrying to think that on the first day of school they would want to call." she said as we reached the gym. I recognized some of the students from some of the other classes were also in this one.
How unfortunate that the two most friendly guys were here! Eric and Mike oh joy another class with them, I think I'll fake a sicky there must be a way to get rid of them!
I thought to myself as Gabi and I handed our slips to the Gym teacher and she told us to sit out and watch today, she would pair us up tomorrow, relieved I sat down next to my sister and asked her.
"Was it just me or did it seem like we have at least one or more enthusiastic males on our hands, another Jacob?" I asked now waving my hand in front of her face to get her attention.
"Huh? What sorry Becks I can't stop thinking about Ben, I'm worried." she said trying her best not to sound upset.
"Gabi, relax I'm sure it's nothing ok. Look lunch is next, we'll sit in the car and we'll give them a quick call and tell them to call us after school ok! I promise you it will work out!" I said giving her a hug and a pat on the back. I was saying those words more to reassure myself than my sister.
"I hope you're right Becks, I hope you are right!" she said breaking free of my hug and turning back to watch the rest of the class play Volleyball, that was one sport I was good at but mainly beach was my favourite oh here I go again!
I scowled at myself lately every time I thought of something we used to do at home, something I missed...it seemed to involve Tai. Tai, Tai ALWAYS Tai why couldn't I just get over him?
I thought to myself, I already knew the answer to that and by the end of the class I had decided.
It wouldn't be an easy choice but I knew that I, I mean WE could do this.
As the end of class bell rang I grabbed my bag and Gabi's arm and headed to the teacher for our slips that we had to take back to the office at the end of the day.
As we left the gym I spotted the Cullen's and the Hale's making their way into the cafeteria. Not realizing that I was staring, I was surprised when Alice turned and waved at both of us before leading the way through the doors.
The remainder of the week passed without any drama's we ate lunch with the group of friends we had made, managed to find our classes easy enough and seemed to slip into an almost old routine.
Our first weekend was spent doing homework while Dad was fishing and by night we spent time as a family attempting to watch some cheesy movie that was on.
I gave up and decided to read one of my favourite books by Stephanie Meyer- Midnight Sun, Gabi, and I both had a copy and knew it by heart which made it boring very quickly.
Giving up I decided I would FORCE myself to read Romeo and Juliet for English.
Sunday Gabi and I paid a visit to the grocery store and Library before going for a walk in the Forrest behind our house, again giving up on that quickly when we thought we heard movement in the bushes behind us.
I decided to finish the day cleaning while Gabi googled just for something to do.
Both Gabi and I had been putting off something we knew we would have to do sooner or later.
So almost two weeks after coming to Forks we decided today was the day to do it, to talk to Tailer and Rueben.
"Becka, Gabi? Wait up!" someone called from behind us, I turned and silently groaned as Eric walked over to us; perfect of all the people to show up at the worst moment it's Eric.
It was a Wednesday afternoon, the sun still had not come out in the whole time we had been here and there had been a fresh pile of snow dumped outside between second and third hour.
Gabi and I were heading towards our truck when Eric decided to follow.
Putting on a fake smile we eached turned to face him at the same time.
"Hey, would you like to join me for lunch?" he asked when he finally caught up with us.
"Actually Eric, we have a couple of things to take care of we were just thinking of having lunch in our truck, our Mum wanted us to call her at lunch to let her know how school's going and she'll freak if we don't call her!" I said trying to sound as apologetic as I made my face look.
"Oh, that's um fine! I'll see you round then!" he replied looking downcast with a smile he turned away and headed to the café.
"Oh, I feel bad now Becks, did we have to do that?" Gabi asked looking after him apologetically.
"Don't worry about its Gabi, Eric will just have to get over himself!" I said as I lead her towards the parking lot with a lot more energy than I realized I had, it was determination more than anything. I realized I was determined to sort this out with Tai.
He was after all the main person other than Gabi that my life revolved around and the fact that I was still in love with him didn't help that matter.
As I unlocked the truck for Gabi I took my cell phone out of my pocket and dialled Tai's number.
"Hello? Becka?" came a relieved Tai from the other end of the phone.
"Yeah Tai, it's me. I've decided I want to try a long-distance relationship; I just can't get you off my mind!" I mumbled the last part smiling as I waited for a reply from Tai.
"Well, um that's awesome babe but um I'd advise that you and Gabi turn around slowly there's a surprise waiting for you behind the truck." It sounded like he was smiling.
Turning around as slowly as possible and trying not to look to excited, I saw that both Tai and Ben were standing at the back of my truck smiling and waving.
"Tai!" I all but cried running as carefully as I could towards him.
"Hey Babe! God I've missed you!" Tai said hugging me tight when I finally reached him.
Glancing at my sister I said "Yeah! I've missed you too Tai, what are you guys doing here? I thought you were going to talk to your parents first?" I asked trying my hardest to not sound annoyed.
"We're staying at Ben's Uncles as soon as I got off the phone to you I went and said that both Ben and I had to see you guys and so we packed and went straight to the airport, and here we are baby, you look worried!" Tai said suddenly alarmed at my unknown expression.
"I'm just wondering how you got past all the teachers around here maybe we should discuss this after school Babe!" I said now realizing that Gabi and Ben were back in the truck with the doors locked.
"Um, yeah! Ok Ben we'd better go mate!" said Tai slightly disappointed.
"Sorry Hun, I just don't want to get into trouble coz it will get back to Dad and Gabi and I will get into trouble!" I said kissing him on the cheek and then turning to bang on the door to get Gabi out of the truck but to my surprise she was already.
"Ok, Gabs time to go, we'll see them after school! Love you Tai but I've got to go!" I said rather reluctantly.
"No! Let's just fake a sickie, go to the office and get off school!" She said not letting go of Ben.
I thought that sounded good but we couldn't do that! Not when it will likely get back to Dad.
"No Gabriella! We are going to class, the boys will be here when we get home, we can't just ditch. You know that Gabs!" I said trying to persuade myself that what I had just said was the right thing to do.
"Fine! I guess you're right Becks, (sigh) let's go then. Mwah Ben I'll miss you!" she said now letting go of Ben and getting her bag from the front seat of the truck.
"Me too Babe!" Ben said nudging Tai to do the same.
"I'd better go too Babe, can't let Gabi go by herself!" I said half-heartedly with a smile and reluctantly took my bag, locked the truck, and walked back towards the school building forcing myself not to look back knowing that if I had I wouldn't be able to go to class.
"Why'd you have to spoil the moment Becka!" asked Gabi glaring at me.
The saying if looks could kill really worked well with Gabi right now.
"I'm sorry Gabriella but if Dad finds out we ditched school he'd probably have a heart attack and we can't have that now can we?" I asked as we reached the building for Trigonometry.
"Oh, how fun a double of Trig!" sighed Gabi looking at her timetable to double check on which class we needed to be in.
"You love Trig Gabs, STOP complaining." I said as we walked to our seats.
"Becka! You're day dreaming again!" said Gabi nudging me about twenty minutes later.
"Rebecka would you like to join us in the real world or would you like to leave the classroom." came Miss Anderson's voice as Gabi nudged me.
"Sorry? What was the question Miss?" I asked hiding my head a little as the teacher repeated the question.
"The answer to question 11 please?" said Miss Anderson
"Um, 1.77254?" I asked realizing that I already knew the answer to that one off by heart.
"Correct, Well Done!" she replied looking rather surprised at my answer. Why hadn't I been listening? What made me drift off? It wasn't like me to daydream in Trig. Then the answer hit me, I knew the reason, the culprit of this event.
I forced myself not to think about it for the rest of the double period.
"For homework please read chapter 34 and do all the questions thought to page 887" said Miss Anderson with a smile as the bell sounded the end of the double period.
Turning to face my sister as we walked out to the car park, I tossed her the keys as I said, "You're driving"
"Yes, let's go!" she said as we opened the doors and she started the overly loud truck.
As she pulled out I glanced around and noticed Alice, Jasper and Edward staring at me.
I smiled at Alice and she waved back politely, I also spotted their two older siblings standing not so far away, the older bear-like one was staring at what felt like me but I could have been wrong.
As I glanced at Gabi I asked her "Did you recognize those guys that passed us on the way to the truck?"
"Um… I wasn't really paying attention but I did recognize one" she said in reply.
"I don't know who the other guy was but whoever he is, he's gorgeous!" I said smiling slightly.
"Becks! Does Tai ring a bell?" asked Gabi as we pulled up outside our Dads well our place I guess, that was going to take some getting used to.
"Of course, but I'm just saying he's cute!" I said simply as I spotted the second-best man in the world Tailer my-almost-boyfriend.
Getting out of the truck I left my bag in the cab and literally ran at Tai who was waiting down by the stairs.
"Hey! How was school?" he asked hugging me and kissing my hair.
Squeezing him back tightly I said disgustedly "We just had a double of Trig!"
"It wasn't that bad Becks!" Said Gabi chucking me my bag followed by the keys before her and Ben ran up the stairs to unlock the door giggling all the way and tripping over each other as Ben moved into kiss her.
As Tai led me towards the steps I stopped him "Tai, can we talk baby?" I said sitting down still holding his hand.
"Yeah! You know we can always talk B!" he said squeezing my hand tightly.
"Are we back on or am I just imagining this?"
"The more I think about us, the more I want to try it, your life, my life B, I want it to be "our" life coz I'm still in love with you!" he said looking at me trying to keep eye contact.
As I looked at him the old feelings came back from before we split, I was still in love with him.
Sighing as he took my hand "Trial?" He asked me kissing my hand.
"Ok, Tai a trial I'm not going to be mucked around though ok!" I said smiling and pecking him on the cheek before leading him into the house.
Dad came home about 9:30 that night I persuaded Tai and Ben to leave before he got home, both Gabi and I knew our father's reaction to the words 'Boyfriend, Dating & Love' he would jump to conclusions that we would shortly be following in their (our parents) footsteps and be getting married.
Gabi and I had both agreed that we would only marry after we were positive about the person involved.
I knew that Tailer Pauletti was a perfect guy to marry and yet somehow I was absolutely determined that he would not be.
The same went for Gabi, it was as simple as me not allowing her to and she knew it well.
As I lay in bed that night another face continued to pop-up, it was one of the Cullen siblings, the older muscular one, his golden topaz eyes, his curly black hair, how small these things were and yet they were things that made me curious about him.
There was something about him, the way he made me feel when I looked at him!
I knew this feeling and I had to stop it NOW!
I was with Tailer; I'd just finished pouring my heart out to him telling him and myself that I was still in love with him.
Was I? Or was I just fooling us both, this Cullen boy, there was something about him, I felt like I knew him- really knew him! It felt like I was connected to him as though we were somehow connected and yet weren't in the same.
I had to find out who he was. All I knew is that he was a part of me, a part of me that I didn't know about yet-that I had to find.
When I woke in the morning I had made the choice that I would find out about this sibling of Alice's as I glanced at the clock and reached for my phone I realized that I had fallen asleep thinking about this boy.
How foolish, no doubt I would think about him all day! How stupid is that, hadn't I convinced myself the night before I was still in love with Tailer…
"Becka? Do you want some French Toast?" came Dad's voice from downstairs in the kitchen.
"Um, yes please!" I called back slightly annoyed but grateful he had interrupted my thoughts.
Glancing at Gabi's bed as I got up I realized she was already up, this wasn't normal for her, I would find out why in the car.
Something just wasn't right, everything was going the wrong way, Dad home, me curious about the Cullen's, Gabi brighter and bubblier than usual…
"Gabi? Time to get out please!" called Dad as he came up the stairs and past the bathroom ten minutes later as I was packing my bag.
"I'm out Dad! I was just doing my hair!" She said happily bounding into our room and coming over to hug me good morning.
"Gabs? What's with you this morning?" I asked looking surprise as we made our way downstairs for breakfast.
"I'm allowed to be happy aren't I B?" she said looking surprised and happy as Dad put our plates down in front of us.
"Thanks Dad!" I said fifteen minutes later as I took my plate to the sink to rinse it.
"Do you mind if we have a couple of friends round after school? I need some help with my Trig and I was going to ask Angela Webber to help me!" I asked as I headed to the door after collecting my bag from the stairs.
"No, not at all, just remember that Billy and Jake are coming up again to watch the special match tonight!" Dad replied with a smirk on his face as he gave Gabi a hug goodbye.
"Sure great Dad! See you!" I said looking annoyed as we left for school.
"B you're not your usual self today!" Gabi said as we backed out onto the road and headed for school.
"What are you on about?" I asked but not able to listen for an answer as I couldn't focus, the more I tried not to think about my relationship with Tai, the more it seemed an impossible idea that I'd agreed to spare both myself and Tailer, but I just couldn't get Alice's brother out of my mind.
I had to know who he was, it was almost as though it was destiny to find out what these feelings meant. I decided that I would ask Alice over as well the more people, the less Jacob could attempt to be well Jacob.
This kept me thinking all the way to the school car park, so much so that I wasn't paying proper attention to where I was driving.