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Challenges listed at the bottom.
Word Count: 743
It Makes You Who You Are
Tony opened his book and snuggled beneath his blanket, thanking every deity that could possibly exist that he finally had a night to just… relax.
The last month had been one call out after another, and when he wasn't out being an Avenger, he was in his lab, trying to keep up to date on his duties for SI, to take the pressure off Pepper.
She was planning her wedding, and she was scary enough without being a bridezilla in Tony's humble opinion.
The fire crackled merrily—the only sound in the room—and Tony sipped at his tumbler of scotch. It was nice to drink because he wanted to, not because it would be polite at a party, or because he felt like he needed alcohol to quiet his brain.
He read for a while, half an hour or so, and was just getting really into the book when he was startled back into awareness of the room by the clearing of a throat.
Looking up, he saw Steve standing awkwardly by the door to the den. He was rumpled in a way he so rarely was, his hair a mess and a crease on his face where he'd been lying down.
"Hey Cap," Tony said, smiling slightly. "You can come in, you know, I won't bite."
Steve flushed a little but approached him anyway, sitting down on the other side of the sofa. Tony flicked the edge of the blanket at him in invitation. He looked… not good.
Well, no, he looked great because he was Steve and Steve always looked great but his eyes were… haunted.
Nightmares then.
Tony didn't ask. He didn't need to. They all suffered from them, and they all had their own ways of dealing with them. Some healthy—Natasha danced in the gym, or watched late night infomercials with Clint—and some not so healthy—both Tony and Clint liked to find their way to the bottom of a bottle.
They sat in silence for a while, and Tony turned his attention back to his book, though he didn't sink as deep into the story as he had before. Beside him, he could feel Steve shifting every few minutes, getting closer and closer to Tony.
Steve liked physical contact after a nightmare. Tony thought it was so he could prove to himself that he was real.
Eventually, Steve's hand found Tony's ankle and wrapped around it. His hold was gentle, and Tony knew if he moved, Steve wouldn't try and stop him. It wasn't about restraint.
It was just comfort.
"Do you ever wish you could just… forget the terrible things in your mind?" Steve asked, breaking the silence.
Tony tilted his head, folding his bookmark into his pages before he closed the book. "Not really."
"No? None of them? I can't stop seeing things I never want to see again," Steve admitted softly. "I just want them to go away."
"Truth is, it is all your memories, the joyful ones and the heartbreaking ones that make up who you are as a person. I kinda like who you are as a person, Steve."
Steve glanced his way. "Yeah?"
"Yeah. Sure, the nightmares suck, but you're not alone. I think that's the important take-away honestly."
Hand tightening slightly on Tony's ankle, Steve nodded. "Yeah… I guess you're right."
"Wanna cuddle?"
Steve bit his lip. "You were reading, I don't want to interrupt. I know you don't get many nights—"
"Hey," Tony said, nudging Steve's thigh with his toes. "You're right that I don't get many nights off, but surely that means it's up to me how I spend them, right?"
Steve nodded, and with only a slight hesitation, he raised his arm for Tony to settle into his side. Tony immediately cuddled close—he was a slut for a cuddle and he didn't care who knew it.
Steve chuckled at his enthusiasm but tightened his hold a little, nuzzling his face against Tony's hair.
"Thanks, Tony."
"Psh, this is not something you ever need to thank me for," Tony replied, his eyes drifting shut. "In fact, I'm gonna complain if you don't cuddle me at least once a week from now on. You're really good at it."
A soft laugh left Steve, and then they stilled, enjoying one another's presence in front of the fire. It wouldn't get rid of the nightmares, but it might scare them off for a moment of respite.
And wasn't that what life was all about anyway?
Written for:
This or That: Fluff: 6. Cuddling in front of the fire
Buttons: O5. Blanket
They Said What: 1. "The truth is, it is all your memories, the joyful ones and the heartbreaking ones that make up who you are as a person."
Wheeeee: Word Count: 743
Funko Pop: Harry Potter: 03. Hermione Granger - Book
365: 44. Book
