Chapter 5:

Surrogate Sisterly Instincts

Saiko, Shroomy, Meggy, and Whimpu ran as fast as they could to the hospital after receiving the news of Tari's injury. With every step they took as they ran, they hoped with all their hearts that she was okay. Mario, Axol, and Rob were quick to follow, as was Melony. There was no way she would be falling asleep for this one.

When they finally got to Tari's room, they found her lying in bed, surrounded by some of her other friends—SMG4, Luigi, and Belle, to be precise. The ones that couldn't make it to the wedding. They were showing concern and sympathy, offering her things to drink or eat, stroking her hair, or otherwise doing what they could to help her feel better. Belle in particular was holding a "get well soon" wreath. That was pretty big of her, given how Tari's goody-goodiness often got on her nerves.

Indeed, Tari looked hurt by the fall she took down the stairs. Nothing in her body appeared to be broken, and her heart rate was normal, but there was a noticeable bruise on her cheek. Despite this, the honest smile she had on her face let herself and everyone know that she would be okay.

The injured cyborg girl quickly noticed the band at the door, and was quick to greet them with her wonderful smile.

"Hi, guys," she weakly said.

"Tari," said Meggy worriedly, "we came as soon as we got SMG4's text."

"How are you feeling?" asked Whimpu.

"Can I get you any corn?" asked Rob.

"I'm fine," Tari weakly replied. "The doctor said I'll be in bed for at least an hour."

A sobbing Mario was quick to rush to Tari and give her a big hug—and a very tight one.

"Thank God the truck missed!" sobbed Mario.

"OW OW OW OW OW!" screamed Tari in pain.

Mario seemed to ignore Tari's cries and continued to squeeze her painfully in his hug; until a furious Saiko forcefully pulled him away—rather roughly.

"GET AWAY FROM HER!" she screamed.

"…or maybe a little longer," said a pained Tari.

After taking a deep breath, Saiko calmed down and got closer to her bedridden gamer friend.

"Who did this to you?" she asked.

"Nobody," explained Tari. "I didn't feel anyone push me down those stairs, and I didn't trip on anything. I guess I was just…clumsy. That's what I get for rushing down those stairs to play Tempest with my friends."

Saiko was relieved from Tari's story that there was no foul play, but she was still upset by her injuries. She even seemed to get angry with the android for her admitted clumsiness.

"Tari…" she said, visibly shaking, "what the hell were you thinking? Do you have any idea how much worse your injuries could have been?!"

This scolding started to scare Tari just a bit. Saiko has been known to have anger problems, and she's usually good about toning them down for the sake of her best friends, but you never get used to it, especially not if you're as sensitive and fragile as Tari.

"I'm sorry," she could only say meekly.

"Saiko, chill," Luigi politely but firmly said. "We're here to help Tari feel better."

Fortunately, the anime girl got the message and calmed down once again. After all, this was the same guy who helped her become a better person.

"Just please don't do that again," she told Tari gently. "You're very precious to me."

"Where's Archibald?" asked Tari.

Right on cue, Axol gave the gamer girl a very familiar rubber duck.

"He's right here," he said.

Immediately, Tari cuddled her beloved rubber ducky as if it were her child.

"It'll be okay, Archibald," she said, "mommy will recover."

Everyone watched as Tari continued to cuddle her rubber duck. It even looked like she was trying to fall asleep with it. This wasn't the weirdest thing they've ever seen. The world they lived in contained some truly bizarre things, but a grown woman showing affection to a rubber duck was the least of it.

"Let's go, guys," said SMG4, "she needs her rest."

"Dream pleasant dreams of corn," said Rob.

And with that, the SMG4 crew quietly left the hospital room to give Tari some room to recover, and Belle hung her wreath on the bed. Saiko was noticeably taking her time leaving the room, and when she did, she slowly closed the door while eyeing Tari. Everyone else was walking to the hospital door, with Saiko barely catching up, likely drowning in her own thoughts.

"Have you guys noticed that Saiko was the hardest hit by Tari's accident?" asked Axol, not even bothering with nicknames right now.

"Hard to blame her," admitted Belle. "She's been really protective of Tari lately. She beat me with her stupid hammer as punishment for gloating a little bit too hard after beating Tari in Smash."

"There was also that homecoming party at Silica City," reminded Luigi.

Bubble Bass was bullying Tari by holding her rubber duck while she tried in vain to get it back from him. He was pressing against her forehead as she tried to get the duck back at arm's length. But the overweight fish bully was obviously too strong for her, and pushed her to the ground. She broke down in tears, truly believing she would never see her precious Archibald again, much to Bubble Bass' amusement.

His sadistic laughter was cut short when he heard the cocking of a shotgun, making him terrified when he realized the gun was pointed right at his face. Bubble Bass turned to find Saiko as its wielder.

"Return her duck," she demanded, "nice and slow."

"And the time SMG3 tied her to the railroad tracks," added SMG4.

Things weren't looking good for Tari as she was tied up to the railroad tracks at Kalamari Desert. The train was fast approaching, and SMG3 was just standing there…menacingly.

"HEELP!" screamed the gamer girl. "HEEEEEELP! Somebody please, help!"

Despite her desperate cries for help, no one seemed to be present to see her in danger, and the train was getting closer. She was sure that she would soon be squashed by that locomotive, and there was nothing she could do about it. All she could do was cry and beg in what she was sure were her final moments.

"Please don't do this," pleaded Tari in-between sobs.

"Why not?" asked SMG3 smugly. "It's fun."

But then, when both of them least expected it, Saiko sprang into action and slammed the front of the train with her signature giant hammer. The force of the hammer was so great that it caused the train to slowly stop in its tracks. Luckily, the speed the train was going was enough to save Tari's life—but when the train finally stopped, she was an inch from potential death.

"Thank you, Saiko," she said breathlessly.

"What are you doing?" asked her captor incredulously. "You're ruining my fun!"

SMG3 knew he made a huge mistake as soon as Saiko—still armed with her hammer—turned around with a furious face, ready to pay him back for his latest bad deed.

"Oh, sugar honey iced tea," he said quickly, knowing the world of pain he was about to be in.

"But," explained Mario, "none of that could possibly compete with what I witnessed Saiko do for Tari. I've never seen anything quite like it. It was the nicest, bravest, most amazing thing you could ever do for your friend. The defining moment of their incredible friendship. The kind deed that makes you realize that Saiko has her back no matter what. Realize that Saiko is the kind of girl you want as someone who protects you."

Saiko and Tari were eating ice cream on a park bench when something seemed to grab the former's attention.

"You got some ice cream on your face," she casually reminded.

"Oh, thanks," replied Tari as she wiped the ice cream off her face with her elbow. Her human elbow.

By the end of his story, Mario couldn't help but sob tears of joy—completely ignoring the annoyed reactions of his friends who had just described the kind deeds that were actually worth a shit. Wanting to get back to their homes already, the rest of the SMG4 crew—including Saiko, who had finally caught up with the rest of them—picked up the pace to the hospital entrance. Mario stopped crying and ran after them to catch up.

"Hey, wait for me!" he called.

When Saiko got home, all she could think about—besides Tari—was that security system she had been eyeing recently. The expensive one that had the capability of shooting unwanted intruders. With no future gigs happening anytime soon, Senbo was more likely to snatch her guitar than ever before, meaning she needed that system sooner than later. Fortunately, sooner came. The minute the young rock star saw the box for it at her doorstep, she began setting it up right away. As previously stated, with her past experience working with robots and machinery, it was easy. And of course, it was the psychotic Teletubbies that sold her the system.

After the system was set up, Saiko called the rest of her band over to her house so they could witness it for themselves. They all got there in a timely manner, eager to see what their friend's new home security—which they all already paid for—was all about.

"Konichiwa!" greeted Saiko. "Glad you guys could make it!"

"You know we wouldn't miss this for the world," assured Meggy.

"We're so excited to see your new security system!" said Shroomy in his usual cheerful manner.

"But what's different?" asked Whimpu.

Indeed, all that looked different about Saiko's house was a dial pad by her front door. But looks can be deceiving. Once the anime girl got close to her house, the roof suddenly opened up, and out of it came several giant guns pointed in her direction, which startled her band, even the ever-trigger-happy Meggy. Their worries were nullified as soon as Saiko unflinchingly entered her credentials into the dial pad, making the guns go back into the roof and opening the door, allowing bullet-free entry for her and her band.

"Woooow," said Shroomy in amazement.

"You had us worried there," said a relieved Whimpu.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" said Saiko in her usual vain manner. "As soon as I close this door, the system will reset. I sent the entry code to all your phones in case you guys need to come to my house for any reason. Remember, keep the code to yourselves. You don't want you-know-who to know about it."

"We're glad you're better-protected, Saiko," said Shroomy supportively.

"I dare Senbo to try to get your guitar now!" said Meggy confidently.

With Saiko in a good mood once more, she invited her band into her house, most likely to watch movies, order something to eat, play music for fun and not for paid gigs, or just hang out. They truly felt secure and free, with no lurkers to bother them.

…or so they thought. Just like at the emergency meeting, they failed to notice their enemy spying on them from far away—this time accompanied by his girlfriend, observing her house as part of their plan. The new security system can be seen from a mile away, so no one could miss it, especially not Senbo and Aibo. As the spying couple watched Saiko and her band enter the house from behind one of the parked cars, Senbo looked like he was about to pop a gasket in frustration, while Aibo looked unafraid, shaking her head in an armfold, as though she felt the guns and lasers were no threat to her.

"God damn it!" cursed Senbo. "First, she tells her friends about us, and now she has a security system?! Why does that stupid bitch have to make life harder for me?!"

"What?!" asked an incredulous Aibo. "You've gotta be kidding me! That's her security system?! That's the best she's got?"

Senbo was confused. He thought it was weird that the house now being upgraded with heavily-loaded guns didn't seem to bother Aibo in the absolute slightest.

"With all due respect, babe," the wannabe musician said, "how can you be so calm? This is a professional security system we're talking about!"

"You're forgetting," reminded Aibo, "the security system resets when Saiko closes the door. And if she were in a hurry, then she wouldn't have time to close the door."

Senbo calmed down when he realized what his girlfriend was talking about.

"Oh yeah," he said, "that's right. Can you walk me through the plan again?"

"Certainly," agreed Aibo. "We just need to go somewhere more secluded."

And with that, the scheming couple held hands as they walked to where they can discuss their plan for Saiko's guitar.

Meggy would soon be eating her words like Mario eats spaghetti.