"What on earth happened there?" Thor murmured, sitting on the bar stool. Christie chewed the inside of her cheek uncomfortably.
"Ashley and I have never really spoken about our childhood - not with each other, anyway," she admitted with a sigh. "We're not that close…anymore."
"Ah. So she never knew that you've resented her for all this time?" Thor guessed before taking another swig of his beer.
"Nope. She was way too wrapped up in her own…tornados," Christie murmured back coldly. "She had no idea how our parents treated me verses how they treated her. She was oblivious."
"Oh Christie," Thor tutted, looking genuinely saddened for her.
"I'm used to it. I guess I should've brought it up earlier, to be fair," Christie nibbled on the inside of her lip. She expected that this day would come around - but she didn't mean for it to be her birthday, of all days.
"At least Loki let his bitterness be well known," Thor grunted to himself, already noticing the similarities between the two sibling relationships. Christie's head shot up at the mere mention on his name, suddenly remembering why she wanted to talk to Thor in the first place.
"Sh*t, yeah - that's what I wanted to say," she hissed. Thor looked at her expectedly and suddenly, Christie found herself under pressure.
"What is it?"
"I think…I think Loki's alive," she began shakily. Thor's face registered many different emotions at once. He look incredibly surprised, then reasonably uncomfortable, then utterly bewildered.
"Christie please don't do this to yourself," he finally murmured calmly. "Don't."
"No, I'm being serious," Christie insisted with a hiss. Thor's eyes flickered shut for a second before they flew open again.
"He died in your arms. His blood soaked your hands," he reminded her sadly. Christie dropped her gaze and clenched her jaw. She didn't have to be reminded - she had the same nightmare every single night. "How could he have possibly have survived?"
"He survived falling off the Bifrost, it's not completely unheard of," Christie muttered stubbornly. "I just-"
"He was stabbed; his skin went cold, his heart stopped and we watched the blood trickle from his mouth," Thor hissed back suddenly. Christie fell quiet and sat back again. She half expected his disbelief, but to this extent?
It was like Thor didn't even want to hear her out.
"What made you conclude this?"
"He said something to me before he died…and your dad said the same thing as we left Asgard… I just thought-" Christie began - but even she could hear how bizarre this was. At first she was so certain; but now that she was saying it out loud - it sounded insane and it was humiliating.
Thor was already shaking his head at her pitifully.
"I know that you are missing him," he murmured, resting a large hand on her shoulder. "But…what you're suggesting implies that he's even worse of a person than I thought. Do you think Loki would ever stoop so low as to fake a death and leave you grieving?"
"The day he died, he literally told me I was responsible for your mother's death," Christie reminded him coldly, shrugging his hand away, "so…yes. Yes I do think that."
"That's not fair. On that day, he was in mourning and hurting!" Christie's eyes squinted at Thor, unable to comprehend that he was defending him.
"Whatever Thor, that's what I think is going on. It's a hunch that I just can't budge and I thought you should know."
"He's gone, b-b-because if Mother died the same way, then how would Loki manage to…." Thor trailed off. He sounded choked up, and it suddenly became clear as to why he was so upset.
His mother had taught Loki all his tricks - so how would he survive something and she wouldn't? Now Christie was regretting mentioning it to begin with. She hopped off the bar stool and shuffled over to stand beside him, nudging his bulky arm to imply that he should let her in for a hug. Thor let out a small chuckle and lifted his arm, bringing her in with ease.
"I was just so sure," she murmured, leaning her head on his broad shoulder. Thor rested his sturdy chin on top of her head and hummed in agreement, his throaty bass rattling against her forehead.
"I wouldn't like to think he'd do something like that to you. He loved you too much to pull such a selfish stunt," he reminded her quietly. "But Christie, please hear me. You need to mourn him properly. Say no to the missions and start the healing process. We can even have a small funeral for him, if it'll help. You can fire the parting arrows and everything." Christie clenched her jaw and lifted her head, feeling the tears well up in her eyes for the first time in weeks. It really hadn't been that long since she'd held Loki's lifeless body in her arms and she knew that she'd gone back to work too quickly, but that was the only way she knew how to avoid the pain of losing him.
As they comfortably stood there in silence, Tony waltzed back into the room with six large pizza boxes, like a housewife bringing food for her son and his friends.
"I bring happiness and pepperoni! And I remembered your spicy BBQ wings this time, Birdboy," he announced, placing the boxes on the centre of the shallow glass coffee table. The group grinned up at him and began tucking in, whilst Tony casually glanced over at Christie and Thor at the bar. "Why don't I have the brotherly sisterly love thing that they have?! Why am I always so hard done by?"
"Seriously Tone?" Bruce raised an eyebrow from where he'd grabbed a slice. "Christie loves you. You were the only one she hugged before she went back to Asgard, remember?"
"Yeaaah but now she's hugging Pointbreak! I'm an only child, and I don't wanna share," Tony rolled his eyes dryly, taking napkins out. "Maybe I should increase the bond with Red instead - where is she, by the way?"
"On the balcony with Cap," Natasha quickly spoke before Clint could.
"Yeah, good luck getting her attention over him," Pepper smirked before hopping up to fetch the paper plates.
Out on the balcony, Ashley had her head in her hands, trying to calm herself down before she did something stupid. "Ashley, look at me," Steve frowned, placing his thumb and forefinger under her chin. Ashley restricted his movements for a few seconds, but quickly gave in and looked up - and Steve's eyes went wide. "Oh god. No - please, not now, Ash," he murmured, swiping underneath her left eye with his thumb. Ashley sniffed as her eyes fell onto Steve's blood stained thumb and she realised what was happening.
"I'm fine, Steve," she lied, ripping her face from his hands and leaning over the balcony railings. The night air wasn't even cool, which made everything worse. Everything felt a little too close.
"I'd say one of the worst things about your mutation," Steve began, walking over to join her, "is that you really can't lie." Ashley rolled her eyes and let out a miserable sniff.
"I just…I never knew she hated me so much. Clearly I'm the only person that didn't know, in fact," she mumbled sadly.
"Woah, I don't think she ever hated you," Steve quickly frowned. "It was probably just the feeling of being overshadowed as a kid by your parents." Ashley couldn't help but scoff at his words and she turned to face him again.
"If that's the case, she should be pulling that up with them! They're only a phone call away. I would've given the world for them to get off my back and get on hers - I didn't exactly enjoy my childhood either!" she expressed angrily. "It was nothing to envy-"
"Well…and I might be a bit out of my depth, here - but I don't think she knows how to blame them," Steve admitted lowly. This took Ashley aback - she blinked at his words.
"What…what do you mean?"
"Before I went under," Steve began as he nibbled his bottom lip, "I remember finding it hard to express how I felt to my parents. They were great guys, but they weren't always the most understanding. They put a lot of pressure on me too. I told them how they had made me feel once, I was totally honest about it. My mom…she took it pretty well. But then she did something that didn't sit well with me at all."
"What did she do?" Ashley asked quietly. She was still staring at him, even though he was no longer looking at her.
"She apologised. And I wasn't expecting it, and it didn't feel right. I felt guilty for sharing how I felt, which was ridiculous and inexplicable - but it made me so uncomfortable that I promised myself never to do it again. Times were different back then though - parents were right, kids were always wrong and were meant to be silent," Steve muttered.
Ashley could tell it was still raw - he still looked uncomfortable talking about it.
"That's…not a good thing, Steve. Children should be able to tell their parents when they're upset without feeling guilty. Anyone should," Ashley stated firmly. Steve let out a little chuckle and turned to her again.
"Did you tell your parents to ease off?" he hummed. Ashley rolled her eyes, already seeing his point.
"No. I took my anger out by blasting fireballs in the garden," she grumbled back.
"Right, and Christie never had that option," Steve sighed, finally reaching his conclusion. "She bit back all her feelings, whether it be out of fear, worry, respect, it doesn't matter. What matters is that now, she's an assassin. If this isn't making sense to you Ash, then I don't know what will." Ashley dropped her gaze ashamedly.
Fair play.
"I just miss when we used to be friends," she mumbled longingly. "It was great for a few years…but it got weird once we both started to hit puberty, and that's way before I'd even moved out. Christie hardly ever spoke."
"Well, maybe today's the day you fix that," Steve decided, standing back up straight again. "You're twenty-five today, it's a new era. She's here now, and she doesn't come down here often. I'll go and get her and you can tell her how you actually feel." Ashley's eyes grew wide in horror and she shook her head, reaching out her hand to stop him.
"No, Steve-"
"Ashley, there's no point waiting any longer," Steve sighed lowly, looking her dead in the eyes. "Hey - if you do this now, I'll bring in the present that I got you." Ashley's anxious eyes faded into excitement and a little smile grew on her lips.
"What? You got me a gift?" she swooned.
"Yeah, but you'll never know what it is unless you do this first. Deal?" Steve held out her hand for her to shake. Ashley bit down on both her plump lips before giving an affirmative nod.
"Deal," she smirked, shaking his large hands in hers. Steve nodded and let go before slipping back into the apartment, leaving Ashley stood there a complete bundle of nerves, dreading the conversation ahead. What was she meant to do? Apologise for something that technically wasn't even her fault? These were the thoughts running through her mind as she went to sit on one of the balcony chairs.
Within moments, she heard the balcony door slide open again, and Christie was soon seated opposite her with her leather jacket slung over her shoulders.
"Hi," she shot her sister a brief smile which Ashley quickly returned.
There was an awkward silence, filled only with the sound of cars in the streets below.
"Steve said you wanted to speak to me, by the way. I'm not just sitting here for fun."
"R-right," Ashley cleared her throat and sat upright, pushing her perfectly done hair out of her face. "So…what Clint said kinda… freaked me out." Christie stayed silent, so Ashley had no choice but to continue - but she wasn't so diplomatic this time. She was already running out of patience. "For god's sake, Christie, talk to me! I had no idea I was this huge arch nemesis of yours until Clint brought it up?!"
"Oh Ashley, stop with the dramatics," Christie snapped.
"Dramatics?" Ashley repeated hollowly.
"Dramatics, yes. First of all, you should never listen to Clint. That guy talks out of his ass," Christie stated firmly, ticking the points off her slender fingers. "Secondly, you're not my arch nemesis? Where are you getting that from?"
"Christie," Ashley sighed. "If you felt this way about how our parents treated you-"
"Don't. Don't go there," Christie quickly cut her off midway. "Don't start this conversation if you're not ready to deal with it head on." Ashley fell quiet and clenched her jaw. She could see that Christie was already on edge and the last thing she wanted to do was push her over.
But still - she just had to know.
"Chris, what the hell happened to you in that place? In Asgard? You weren't like this when I last saw you."
Christie's features softened for the first time in what Ashley was sure had been years. She had never seen her break that exterior before. The question clearly caught her off guard.
"What…what does Asgard have to do with anything?" she managed to scramble a few words together to ask.
"Look, you've clearly changed. I don't care what you did as a kid, I care about what you're doing now," Ashley told her calmly.
"Of course you don't care what I did as a kid," Christie shook her head bitterly. "Why the hell would you care? This is exactly what I mean about starting a conversation you can't finish! Life was just so easy for you, wasn't it?"
"Easy?" Ashley repeated in disbelief. "You really thought I was their favourite? Really, Christie? Were you that oblivious?"
"Were you?" Christie shot back. There was nothing but venom dripping in her voice and pain building in her eyes. Deep down, under all that unspoken anger, she knew that she was upset at the wrong person. This had nothing to do with Ashley; she could only grow up in the environment that her parents had moulded.
She was being bitter towards the wrong person and she had to stop herself before it got too far. She knew the type of person this could turn her into and she was freaking out.
She couldn't turn into Loki.
"I clearly was oblivious - and I'm genuinely sorry," Ashley suddenly murmured back. Christie snapped out of her thoughts and looked over at her again to see that she was crying. Not blood this time, but hot, thick tears. She was crying for her, not because of her - and that was all Christie had to see.
"Oh you're such a flipping drama queen," she rolled her eyes, but with a little forgiving smile. "Ashley, I swear I don't hate you. I never have. I resented you, but none of that is your fault. It's down to the bald prick we call a father. I'm sorry for offloading so suddenly." Ashley gave her a tearful giggle in response and quickly dabbed under her eyes. "I'm sorry you had to find out this way, too, on your birthday. I shouldn't have let all these years by without raising it."
"It's not your fault," Ashley sniffed back, "we weren't even together for majority of our teens. We were doomed for failure."
"Fantastic point," Christie raised her brows and leaned back. "I swear, it all started from when Dad said that I wasn't allowed to go to his flipping special school."
"Count yourself lucky, Chris. After all that's happened, I've still somehow ended up here with you. It's like I can barely stay away, huh?" Ashley giggled tearfully, making Christie laugh. "You do still mean so much to me. I just hated the idea of you disliking me when I literally adore you so much, you know? You were the first person I ever showed my mutation to and I remember how in awe you were…until coming here, I'd never seen that face on anyone else. You're the only person that thought I was the best thing in the entire world." Christie swore under her breath as she felt a tear dribble out of her eye, causing her to swipe it away quickly.
"Ugh. You're such a b*tch for making me cry," she hissed. "I…I do love you, too. And I was extremely concerned when Heimdall said he couldn't see you."
"You mean when I read away to the forest- wait, who is Heimdall?" Ashley sniffed.
"He's a golden eyed all-seeing guy from Asgard- nevermind, you genuinely wouldn't believe me," Christie grinned back. Ashley smirked and rolled her eyes.
"Speaking of Asgard-"
But Christie still wasn't having any of it.
"Please, Ash. Not on your birthday," she begged, staring at her in sincerity. Ashley gave a deep sigh, half expecting such an answer, but nodded reluctantly.
The small progress they had made was more than enough for now.
"Fine, fine. Thanks for this though, I feel a lot better." She gave a genuine smile to Christie and received one back.
"You're welcome, consider this a birthday present - now would you come back inside? You're bumming this party out," Christie tutted as she leapt up. Ashley let out a short laugh and stood up as well. "OH! Speaking of - what is happening with you and Steve? Are you the lucky girl out of the millions that want him that he actually wants back?"
"Please, don't. That's what Clint has been teasing me about all this time," Ashley shuddered as they both walked back into the living room, soon face to face with the chatting and eating group again. Bruce glanced up to see them enter and his eyes lit up.
"Heyyyy there they are," he grinned, making everyone turn around too. Ashley grabbed Christie's slim wrists and practically galloped over to the hot pizzas excitedly.
"Look Chris, spicy meat feast! Our favourite!" Ashley sang as they approached the coffee table.
"Thank f*ck for that, I haven't eaten all day," Christie breathed as she took a seat.
"Meat feast is your favourite?" Tony clarified, raising a sceptical brow from where he was lounging lazily beside Pepper.
"Yeah, what's yours?" Ashley frowned at him before tucking in.
"Tuna salad," Pepper hissed, making Ashley, Clint, Natasha and Jane all pull a face of disgust.
"On pizza?!" Christie blinked rapidly as Bruce gave her a saddened nod.
"He calls it a taste-"
"It is a taste sensation!" Tony sassed as he reached for another slice. Whilst the group started to bicker with him, the elevator door pinged open, and out walked Steve with a large white bowed box in his arms.
Ashley's mouth dropped.
...
next chapter tomorrow cos it's not long enough to wait a week for - also, sorry this had a bit of a loose end to tie up with christie - it's all for a good reason but this is still ashley / x men / avengers based, don't worry!