"Nachos, cheese and homemade guac, coming right up!" Ashley announced as she and Bruce waltzed across the living room floor to return the rest of the team with their fancy dips.
"Yesss!" Pepper grinned, grabbing a nacho from the large bowl on the coffee table. "Guys, this looks amazing!"
"Bruce, did you really have a hand in making this too?" Natasha smirked in amusement, as she watched the two of them place the dip bowls down.
"Yikes - don't sound too surprised," Bruce frowned back at her. "I can be gentle as well, you know!"
"We don't doubt it, buddy," Tony nodded firmly, clapping him playfully on the shoulder. Ashley wiped her hands on her jeans before walking over to Steve, who was seated on one of the swivel armchairs, and carefully plopping herself on his lap. Steve wrapped his arms around her waist almost instantaneously, not even having to look up, and Pepper and Natasha couldn't help but exchange little smirks at how well they fit in with each other. "Hey lovebirds - when you finally have those weird little nature-power-soldier babies, will you name the first one after me? The name Tony is unisex, don't forget!" Tony quipped as he helped himself to a few nachos and guac. Steve rolled his eyes and said nothing, whilst Ashley squinted her eyes and cocked her head to the side in thought.
"Why would we have to name our child 'Tony'? I mean no offence, Tone - but why you, out of everyone?" she couldn't help but giggle.
"Ya know, that is a great question?" Clint chuckled back with a cold beer in his hands. "It would honestly be me if anyone, right Ash?" This time, Steve couldn't help but laugh out loud - this whole conversation was completely bizarre to him.
"Ya hear that laugh? That screams 'butt out birdbrain'. To answer your quesiton, Red - ya might wanna name them in memory of me?" Tony frowned in annoyance over Clint's cheeky outburst. Steve slammed his hand over his face and shook his head.
"In memory? Tony…you're very much alive," Ashley blinked, crinkling her nose.
"For now! Who knows where I'll be by the time you two actually get it cracking?" Tony grumbled cheekily, earning another sharp elbow in the ribs from Pepper. "Ouch? Honey, it was am extremely valid point." Before either Ashley or Pepper could respond, the elevator pinged and in walked Christie, with none other than Thor behind her.
"Ahhh now the party's all here!" Clint cheered as they both approached the group who had smiles on their faces. Christie shot them a little smirk, settling herself down on a beanbag as she usually did - but Thor wasn't smiling for once.
"Big guy, you okay?" Bruce frowned up at the concerned looking demi-god.
Thor took a large breath in before answering, already looking a little regretful.
"Today, I was made aware of the remainings of HYDRA…now there aren't many bases left, yet I know one of them holds something that I certainly need to recover," Thor explained to them all. He seemed incredibly nervous and nobody could put their finger on why. "It's…well, it's…I need Loki's sceptre." Christie's blood ran cold as she felt every single person in that room turn their head to look at her before they could stop themselves.
But she tried not to look at anyone, she was desperate not to in fact.
"So HYDRA currently has Loki's sceptre? Do we know what they're planning on doing with it?" Steve clarified, sitting up a little straighter and resting his chin on Ashley's shoulder.
"We do not, no. So I'd much appreciate if, once we dismantle the…rest of the bases, we can, uh, keep an eye out for it," Thor rounded up quickly before finally taking a seat. "Stark, I am well aware that you are now retired-"
"Are you kidding?" Tony scoffed with a daring look in his dark eyes. "I'd come straight outta retirement for this, it sounds like way too much fun! Also…what the hell would you guys do without me, huh?" Christie chewed the inside of her cheek and focussed on her hands that were twisting around nervously in her lap, internally praying that nobody bothered mentioning her.
But Thor just had to say something.
"And of course, Christie - I do not expect you to-"
"To what?" Christie laughed lightly, lifting her head again with a frown as everyone turned to look over at her again. "Join in? Thor, you don't have to worry about me. If it's…h-his sceptre we need to get, then his sceptre we will acquire."
Thor gave her a solemn nod and said nothing more.
"Bless her," Tony hummed, leaning on his fist. "Hey, Whitey - if you ever have a kid, will you call them Tony?"
Ashley, Steve, Pepper, Bruce and Clint all rolled their eyes and let out simultaneous groans, whilst Christie couldn't help but smirk at his request.
"Of course I will," she smiled at him across the room. "You might have to settle for a middle name though - particularly if it's a girl."
"I don't blame you, it is a rather hideous name," Thor hummed into his glass under his breath, making Steve and Clint stifle their laughter.
"That will suffice," Tony nodded solemnly before shooting Ashley an irritated look. "Certainly better than SOME."
"She's only saying that because she doesn't want children, Tony. It's quite an empty promise," Ashley told him with a risen eyebrow.
"Empty and yet oh so full," Tony tutted.
…
A few days later, S.H.I.E.L.D. had picked up on new HYDRA base intel and was showing it to the team in the Avengers Tower's meeting room. Well, Maria Hill was - the rest were figuring out a strategy, particularly when it came to Bruce. "So am I meant to kinda just…wait? Like, hover around till you guys finally get home?" he was asking as he took regular sips of his morning cup of coffee.
"…no, you're gonna suit up with the rest of us?" Steve gave a light chuckle as if it were obvious.
"Yeah but when we're done, you guys get to come home in the jet and cool off and I…I won't even be able to fit in the jet. Unless, of course, you're all willing to twiddle your thumbs until I get over myself again," Bruce blinked as if it were obvious.
Everyone around the table immediately fell quiet, realising that he had a point.
"How do you usually snap yourself out of it?" Ashley asked him, leaning on the palm of her hand and absentmindedly stirring her hot chocolate with the other.
"It subsides on its own," Bruce mused. "He kinda just…goes."
"So how do we make it just…go…faster and on our time?" Clint blinked at the rest of the group.
"He needs a trigger word," Tony decided with an affirmative nod as he stood to his feet and began to pace, "something that we drill into your head now that, when the time comes, will wake you outta your…mood. Like…I dunno, 'pumpkins'."
"Pumpkins…?" Natasha raised an eyebrow.
"I'm sorry, does anyone else have any other smart ideas?" Tony scoffed, glancing around at the rest of them. There was a thick later of silence silence across the table as they all shrugged at each other. "Then 'pumpkins' it is!"
…
"PUMPKIN! PUMPKIIIINNNNN!" Tony yelled out as he soared beside Hulk, who was carelessly destroying and dismantling the HYDRA base piece by piece.
"Very smooth plan by the way, Stark!" Ashley rolled her eyes from where she was on the ground, spraying one of the backdoors with ice so that she could smash it open. She didn't want to burst all the doors through with fire, just in case there were delicate pieces of intel on the inside. The last thing she wanted to do was accidentally destroy them. As she blasted away Christie was covering for her, shooting any soldiers that attempted to run up on them.
"If the sceptre's actually in there, we're absolutely screwed by the way," Christie added in as she shot down another two agents. "Banner is really going to town today!"
"I mean technically…like, did Thor ever specify he needed the sceptre all in one piece?" Tony winced over the disruptive sound of Bruce's roars.
"'Tis much preferred, Stark!" Thor bellowed back as he crushed a few more of the HYDRA soldiers with his Mjonlir, working side by side with Steve a little further away from the compound.
"Let's face it, guys," Clint grunted, whilst aiming and shooting his arrows from where he was perched on the roof, "Banner really doesn't need to be at every mission."
"What? Spoilt sport! He's apart of the team too, isn't he? Why don't we leave you at home and see how you like it?" Tony pointed out with a pout whilst soaring around the destroyed half of the building.
"Yeah but there's a time and a place, Stark - and this was clearly neither. The compound is tiny and there's not even enough guards for him to be of any proper value," Steve pointed out as he used his shield as a frisbee to take out the remaining soldiers. "Well, the compound was tiny."
Natasha hopped into the ruins of the base with her torch risen, searching amongst the rubble for any sign of what was left the sceptre. Hulk finally rested and stood still, seeing that there was nothing else to smash and no more 'immediate' threats. The shooting had stopped - they had taken all of them out. Stark landed next to him and swiftly took himself out of the suit, giving him the freedom to roam around as well.
"No sign of the sceptre down here. Another dead end," Natasha sighed, settling herself in front of one of the comms systems. "In fact, looks like this base didn't hold a lot at all. Some information that we're scanning in now but…nothing fun from the looks of it, I'm afraid."
"Yeah, unless it's under all this damn rubble," Clint scoffed back as he shoved his bow back in the holster. Thor flew over and landed right in front of them with a hefty grunt before looking around as well.
"No, it's not," he muttered. "It would've been easier to spot - much easier, at that. It's too powerful to be left sitting out."
Suddenly, the back door blew open, revealing a smiling Ashley with a bored looking Christie by her side.
"Oh," Ashley's smile faltered once she had seen that everything had already been completely trashed. "Well. Uh…I guess 'pumpkins' didn't make a difference, then?"
"What can we say? Stark's clever ideas strikes again," Christie whispered under her breath, as Tony rolled his eyes and flung his head back.