XXX

There was a knock on his door.

"Hey, DeeDee, you okay?"

Remus.

Hearing his friend on the other side, Janus quickly tried to wipe his eyes, to hide the fact that he had been crying, even if he knew it was a lost cause.

"I'm fine, Remus," Janus called back, cursing the sound of his voice.

"You sure, Dee? 'Cuz Virgil just came to tell me that you got into an argument with the dumbasses," said Remus. "And you don't sound like your usual snakey self."

Janus rubbed his eyes again, tears soaking into the fabric of his gloves.

"Virgil wasn't even there," he pointed out as he stood.

"Yeah, I think he asked Daddy about it."

He leaned his forehead onto the door for a moment, taking in a deep breath, before straightening himself up and pulling it open. Behind the door, Remus stood, his stance casual, even if his expression was concerned.

"You wanna talk about it?" Remus offered.

Instead of answering, Janus gestured for Remus to come into the room. Remus immediately accepted the invitation, flopping onto Janus's couch as Janus closed the door. Then, he sat himself next to Remus, not quite leaning against him, and buried his face in his hands.

"Sometimes, I really regret opening up to them," Janus admitted, his voice heavy.

"Hm?"

Remus tilted his head, waiting for Janus to elaborate.

A deep breath in.

"I just- They treat me like a child now, Remus! Every time I get upset, they act like I'm just throwing a tantrum and I need to be settled down!" Janus explained. "But Roman and Virgil spent weeks manipulating me, and now Roman just ruins my blanket and acts like I can't even be upset about it!"

He lifted his face out of his hands, looking up at Remus.

"It just… It kinda makes me wonder how sincere their apology for that whole thing was, at least on Roman's end. I do feel like Virgil's been trying, as surprising as it is, but your brother…," Janus continued. "I feel like he's nice to me as long as nothing goes wrong, but as soon as it does, it's somehow my fault. And Patton's been trying longer than the rest of them, but he's still biased against me! Roman was the one who did something wrong, but he scolded me because I had the audacity to get upset!"

Janus crossed his arms across his chest, laying back into the couch more. Remus, meanwhile, also crossed his arms, humming as he kicked his feet through the air a bit.

"Well, if they're being jerks, you don't have to spend time with them," Remus suggested. "Like, make them see what they're missing, maybe?"

This, however, only made Janus grimace, his emotions conflicted.

"But I like spending time with them," Janus sighed quietly, averting his gaze. "At least, when we aren't arguing. It's just- I don't just forget about the argument as soon as we're done arguing. Even if they treat me nicely later, I'm still going to remember what they did today, you know?"

He turned away, shifting awkwardly.

"And I know that works both ways. It's not like I've never said or done anything to hurt them, but I've been trying really hard not to behave like that for a while now, and," Janus paused. "It sucks when they don't reciprocate, especially after we had our little heart-to-hearts. It's not fair to put reconciliation on only my shoulders when we've all had a hand in past injuries."

Then, Janus turned his gaze back toward Remus.

"All I wanted from him today was an apology," spoke Janus, his wobbling voice growing softer. "And I couldn't get it."

Remus was quiet for a moment, thinking things over as he tilted his head back and forth.

"Well, Roman can be an asshole sometimes, Janny," Remus said. "And sometimes, telling him that he's wrong triggers an argument before you can really even explain why he's wrong. And I mean, Roman is kind of an idiot, but I think he feels bad about some of this stuff later. But in the moment, he isn't always being reasonable."

"If he feels bad, he sure doesn't act like it."

"Yeah, 'Cuz he's prideful," Remus explained. "He hates apologizing, so he's only gonna do it if he does something pretty bad. Ya know, like manipulating you. Plus, Virgey was a part of it, so he was probably kinda forced into apologizing. But unless someone makes him, he doesn't usually do it. He'd rather just stew with his guilt instead of trying to fix what he did."

Remus put his hands up.

"Which is kind of an asshole move, too, but…," Remus trailed off for a bit. "At least he's not a complete asshole, I guess? I don't know, I'm not trying to defend him here, but if you do want to spend time with him and the others, maybe try telling them what you told me? Maybe they don't even know that they're being assholes… Actually, does that make them even bigger assholes…? I dunno, I'm not exactly great at advice. I'm a lot better with literal assholes."

By the end of his rambling, Remus sounded uncertain, but Janus still got the idea that Remus was trying to help.

"I did try to tell them," Janus protested. "At least, some of it."

"Well, what'd they say about it?"

"… I think I stormed off before they said anything."

"Dee."

"I know," Janus huffed. "But this isn't the first time we've had this kind of conversation, and I'm tired of explaining and trying to get them to understand. At a certain point, it's easier to just give up."

Remus suddenly held a finger up, gaining an excited look about him.

"Or, we can confiscate their kneecaps until they cut their crap," Remus suggested.

Janus just shrugged. Remus lowered his finger and mimicked the action.

"Seriously, though, if they're being assholes, then fuck 'em," Remus told him. "But I know you're friends now and whatever, so if you don't wanna do that, give them a chance to fix it, I guess? I mean, I really would go with the kneecaps thing, but I get that isn't really your style."

"… I guess so."

"Okay, good," Remus nodded. "Now, do you wanna do something? I can go grab some horror movies if you wanna have a movie marathon."

"Okay."

XXX

Yeah, so, I really hate it when someone does something and then doesn't even bother apologizing. 'Cuz sometimes, that is literally all I want from someone when they do something wrong and I can't get it. And I love Roman, but I do think he's the kind of person whose pride gets in the way of him apologizing (based on what happened in 'Accepting Anxiety'). He seemed to only force himself to tell Virgil how important he was because he had to, and if he wasn't kinda forced at first, I don't think he would have ever befriended Virgil.

Idk, mini character discussion over? Sorry for the ramble.