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Alright, and here's Remus and Patton. Sorry, I know it's been a while, but my senior year of college just started, and I have Owl House brain rot on top of it lol.

So, this is the previously-mentioned 'Patton starting to understand Remus more' thing.

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He was fine.

He was fine, he was fine, he was fine, fine, fine.

Nothing was wrong, and he was fine.

He wasn't lonely or sad or bitter or all those boring emotions that boring people felt.

No, Remus was happy and excited and sometimes angry but always excited and happy, happy, happy.

Except when he wasn't.

Now, Remus knew that Janus couldn't always spend time with him- he knew that the two of them had their roles and jobs in the mindscape, and he knew that Dee was busy sometimes; Hell, he was busy sometimes (even if Thomas didn't always like to acknowledge how many of his ideas had Remus's influence). He also knew that, even when Janus wasn't busy, he didn't have to spend all his free time with him. Janus had his hobbies, and he was friends with the others now, and sometimes Janus wanted to spend time with them instead of him (and Remus was happy for him, he really was, but sometimes it hurt a little when Janus chose them over him, and he couldn't really join them, not most of the time, so that just left Remus all alone).

Whatever loneliness he felt wasn't Janus's responsibility, and the deceitful side spent a lot of time with him anyway. Lately, he'd been spending more time with him than he had since they were children, and it was great, but somehow, the more he got, the less it felt like enough (and maybe Janus would be proud of him being selfish, but the jealousy burned sometimes, burned in his chest like acid melting away at his heart and lungs and all his organs, and it hurt, but not in the way he liked, and he couldn't even complain because he was getting what he wanted but just not enough of it). He was like a starving man who'd forgotten just how hungry he was until he'd been given a taste of food and realized that he needed more, but he couldn't get it, and it wasn't like he didn't want what food was given to him, but he still needed more.

He could see how much happier Janny was now that he had befriended the others- could see it whenever they spent time with each other, could see it in his face and his body and the way he laughed so much more freely now, and even if Dee still ran into problems with the others, things were just so much better for him than they were before.

And Remus really was happy for his friend. He was. But sometimes, he'd watch from the shadows while Janus spent time with the others (instead of him), and he'd try to pretend that he was a part of whatever it was they were doing, but he wasn't, and they didn't even see him, let alone talk to him or listen to him, and the illusion would die. Because he wasn't a part of any of it.

He didn't know what he'd done wrong.

First, his brother hated him so much that he didn't even want to be the same person anymore, and they split, and then Roman could hate him instead of hating himself (even if Roman also hated himself, but he still hated Remus, hated him, hated him, hated him). Patton feared him, and Logan dismissed him. Virgil left. The only one who didn't leave was Janus, and even then, Janus would sometimes hide away, sometimes ignore him.

And then Janus found him that day and started spending more time with him again (and it wasn't enough, but he couldn't ask for more), and Remus was so much happier than he had been in a while.

But then DeeDee also started getting closer to the others, and now Remus feared that he would end up losing him, losing him like he lost Virgil.

He still wasn't even sure what happened with Virgil.

Sure, the little emo got spooked by his antics sometimes, but wasn't that all part of the game? When they were younger, the three of them would hang out and laugh, and Virgil didn't seem to be so bothered by him back then. He'd get scared but the moment would pass, and sometimes, he'd even laugh along once he'd realized it was just Remus pulling a joke again. The Dark Sides hadn't been close in the sense that they told each other everything, but they had been close.

And then Janus and Virgil started fighting all the time, and Remus wasn't even always sure what it was about. The Light Sides mostly, he thought. Janus would yell things that mirrored Remus's own thoughts now- his fears about Virgil leaving them for the Light Sides, abandoning them, ignoring them- and Janus's fears (and Remus's) had come to pass. And then Virgil did leave and did abandon and ignore them, and even though he and Virgil barely fought during that time, the next time he saw Virgil, the man hated him. He didn't want him there, didn't even want to tolerate his presence, even though Janus had told him that Thomas should finally be able to meet him. Even though Virgil was once just like them, just like them until he left because he hated them, but Remus didn't even know why Virgil hated him so much.

Now, though, Remus feared that history would repeat itself. Dee started cozying on up to the Light Sides, and Remus hadn't said anything. He just backed off, let Janus ignore him, up until Janus realized that Remus wasn't as okay as he was supposed to be. And then Janus let him past both his literal and metaphorical walls, but he started letting the others in too, and now Remus feared that Janus would end up being taken away from him again right as he started to get him back (even if Janus never really left, but they had drifted).

But he knew that, even if Janus got taken away, even if he chose to go, he couldn't stop him- shouldn't stop him. He couldn't hold him back and keep him from being happy just because he got lonely sometimes. That wasn't fair, and he knew it, and even if Remus liked to play dirty, he wouldn't stoop so low as to prevent his best (only) friend from being happy. That- That would make him a monster, exactly the monster the others already saw him as.

He didn't think he was a monster. He knew he could be a bit much, knew he could get carried away, knew his ideas could be horrifying and gross and sometimes terrible- but was he really all that bad? Plenty of people enjoyed horror and monsters and dark humor and all the things he encompassed, and besides that, he couldn't exactly help being what was at his core. This was who he was, as much as Patton was moral and Logan was smart. If he scrubbed himself clean of everything that other people hated about him, he wouldn't be himself anymore.

And if everything that made someone up was wrong, everything a mistake…

Well, then what did that make him?

Remus hadn't exactly noticed what he was doing while his thoughts raced, raced like three blind mice after the butcher's wife got to them, but he had apparently left his room. He'd apparently found his way to the Dark Side's common room, a room they practically never used anymore because Virgil was gone and Janus hid away in his room, leaving it as essentially just one more place for Remus to conduct his various experiments.

Apparently, he'd broken something because there was shattered glass all over the floor, and apparently, he'd started crying because his cheeks were wet.

And apparently Patton had come over to this side of the mind palace for some reason, because there he was, standing in front of him and gripping his hands and staring at him with a look that was just so concerned.

"Remus? Do you hear me?"

Right then, something had gotten loose in Remus's head, and he wasn't quite able to stick it back in the right place just then, so for a little while, he just stared at the moral side.

Patton frowned.

"Let's… let's get this glass cleaned up, okay, kiddo?"

And then Patton turned to leave, but somehow, Remus's hand shot out and gripped onto the sleeve of his shirt, all without him telling it to, even allowing it too.

"Remus?"

Patton turned back to him, the concerned expression returning.

It was then that Remus's mouth remembered how to use words, though the question he asked wasn't exactly the one he wanted, or at least, not entirely.

"… Why are you here?"

It came out sounding more accusing than he had meant it. Sure, he wanted to know why Patton was here in this location since it was unusual, but he more wanted to know why Patton was here- standing in front of him and holding his hands and looking at him like that.

Patton tilted his head, and Remus wasn't sure what to make of the way his expression shifted.

"I came to ask Janus something, but I heard glass shattering, so…," he trailed off, looking away for a moment.

And it was stupid, since Remus knew Patton had no reason to seek him out (quite the opposite), but some tiny little thing inside of his chest stung aa little bit when he heard that Patton was there to talk to Janus. Of course he was, of course he was- that made sense! But that tiny thing in his chest had apparently hoped for something different.

"Are you okay there, kiddo?"

Remus wiped his cheeks, trying to erase away the emotions that no one else needed to see.

"Of course I'm fine!" he replied, forcing his voice into its normal cackle. "Just felt like breaking some shit!"

He saw Patton's mouth twitch at the use of the curse word, and even though the other man didn't verbally call him out on it, it shone out from his face like a beacon of disapproval.

It shouldn't have hurt as much as it did.

"… Remus, I…," he started. "I think we both know that something's wrong here, and you don't have to tell me what it is, but we do need to at least clean up the glass before you get hurt."

Of course something's wrong!

"Nah, it's fine, it's fine!" Remus denied, ignoring the way tears were slowly falling down his cheeks again. "I don't really care if it cuts my feet up! Maybe it'll dig into my heels and tear my skin up into little bits until my legs just end in blood little torn up stumps because the glass cut it all up! Except I'm wearing my boots, so it probably won't, but I could take them off, or I could just eat the glass as a snack. It's better than potato chips, you know! Cuts up your insides and makes them all messed up!"

He couldn't stop his mouth from running off with the thoughts that were practically bursting from his head. Even when he saw Patton's face grow pale, he just kept going, almost getting a sort of sick satisfaction from the way he knew it bothered the more squeamish man. Only almost, though. Part of him did feel bad about it, especially since that part seemed to recognize that Patton was actually trying to help.

But then, despite Remus's string of rambling, Patton's face grew determined, and before Remus could even register what was happening, Patton reached his arms out and pulled him into a hug.

Remus froze in the embrace, his mouth finally deciding to shut up, as Patton's arms started constricting him, but in a nice way.

And then Remus let out a little squeaked sob- and where did that come from- and Patton's arms grew tighter.

"It's okay, Kiddo… It's okay…"

He wanted to tell Patton that it wasn't okay. He wanted to scream about how it wasn't okay that everyone hated him, that everyone wanted to leave him, leave him alone, that it wasn't okay that he was crying and breaking things and whatever else because he was so lonely. He wanted to tell him that it wasn't okay because it wasn't. He wanted to tell him that he wasn't okay, that he wasn't going to be because the only things that ever seemed to change just threatened to make things worse.

But he couldn't say any of that because he was crying, crying in Patton's arms, crying as he carefully led Remus away from the glass, crying as he was gently pushed onto the couch, and crying as Patton sat down next to him, ignoring the fact that the couch was covered in any number of mysterious substances.

And once Remus's sobs eventually settled down into sniffles, Patton took him by the hand and looked him in the eyes.

"I… I think we need to have a little talk, Kiddo."

And that was definitely an understatement if he ever heard one, and Remus wanted to simultaneously scream at him and start crying again and pull him back into another hug and so many other things, conflicting things.

But Patton was looking at him, and he wasn't shying away, not right then, and he was sitting on the couch Remus ruined in the room he'd covered in shattered glass and who knew what else in the side of the mind where dark things wandered. And in a sudden burst of clarity breaking through his sadness, he realized that maybe, just maybe, this could be the beginning of a good kind of change.

One where he might not feel so alone.

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Well, that ended up pretty angsty. I hope I conveyed what I was trying to do here with Remus's character well enough? Idk, I usually don't have this much trouble writing him, but I also usually focus more on Janus in these things, so hopefully this works.

At this point in the story, Janus is spending more time with Remus, and the others have already started tolerating him more, but sometimes, even if you technically have someone to talk to, it's still lonely when it's only that one person, and you obviously can't take all of their time. Better to have a few friends, I guess?

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