Chapter 1: Greene Family Melt Down Or: How Beth Greene Thought She'd Made Her Biggest Mistake, Only For It To End Up Being Her Best
If you had asked Beth Greene at the start of all this if she regretted her choice to rashly drive away from her farm that first day, she would have absolutely said yes before promptly bursting into tears. But now, years later, she knew that she wouldn't change a damn thing. That choice led her to her family. Not all by blood, but family nonetheless. That choice led her into the arms of Daryl Dixon. The love of her life and her safe harbour in a ruthless world.
It had been a hot day, unbearably so. Maybe that's why the tensions had been running so high, the sound of the air conditioner trying it's absolute hardest to cool the farm house- and buzzing obnoxiously as it did- playing as the soundtrack to the Greene family meltdown. Beth had been caught taking Nellie out for a ride off farm property alone, much to her parents' horror. By their reactions you would have thought they'd caught her shooting up heroin, or naked with a boy- equally horrible crimes in her southern and highly traditional parents' eyes- but no. Rather, she'd simply been exploring land she'd lived on since birth, on a horse she'd had since she was five. She knew that as the baby of the family she should expect smothering, but this was a whole different level.
Typically, when her parents were like this, Beth kept her mouth shut. Only ever uttering out "yes sirs" and "yes ma'ams" as they lectured her, teeth gritted tight to keep the words desperately trying to spill out trapped. It had been months of this- years. Beth was young, she knew this, but she also knew that she was rapidly approaching adulthood, her high school career nearly at its end. And yet, it seemed the older she got, the tighter her parents held the leash. Her sixteenth birthday had come and gone with her not being permitted to take her driving test; that was the closest she'd ever come to blowing up at her family… until this day.
"You're still too young." They'd said. "You're just not quite mature enough yet. Besides, why rush it when we, or Maggie, can drive you wherever you want to go?" They'd stopped her from reaching such a major milestone with smiles on their lips and patronisation in their voices. She knew they loved her, they really did, but that love caused them to grip onto her too tightly. They were suffocating her, not protecting her. Her father and Maggie were the worst of all. When they looked at her they saw not a woman a week short of eighteen, but the small girl who'd hero worshipped her big sister and clung to her father's pant leg. Maybe that's why she was unable to keep herself from yelling back this time, their patronization finally becoming too much. The words tumbling from her lips were growing more and more heated with each moment, every muscle in her body tensed with anger and her chest feeling like it was in a knot. Her mother simply sat there, shocked, as she and Maggie both grew red in the face from screaming at each other, neither holding back as they lashed out at each other verbally.
Maggie and Beth used to be a team, the definition of partners in crime. Beth would cover for Maggie whenever she would sneak out as a teenager or break curfew and, sometimes, Maggie would bring her little sister along on her late night joy rides in their father's- now Maggie's- truck. But then Beth turned fifteen and everything went to crap. Not even two days after her birthday her boyfriend broke up with her and took all of her friends with him. Beth wouldn't say he was the reason for her depression, it was more like the break up was the straw that broke the camel's back. She lost the boy she'd believed was the love of her life, as every fifteen year old girl thinks of her first boyfriend, but she also lost her entire friend group.
Her high school was small, everyone knew everyone and had since they were little. She had always thought everyone knowing everyone was a good thing, until Jimmy. He'd eventually decided that enough was enough, they'd been together long enough and it was time for Beth to let him between her legs. But Beth was a good girl raised in a traditional household. She might not have been saving herself for marriage exactly, but she at least wanted to wait until she was in love, ready, and comfortable. Especially after a lifetime of living in a house where such things were not even spoken of, much less acceptable. Jimmy didn't like that answer. At all. They'd argued until they were blue in the face and Beth was crying and then, he broke up with her. Not before ranting for two hours about how there was no reason she shouldn't feel comfortable with him and that her parts weren't so special that he had to put up with this, that is.
She'd cried for hours, refusing to tell her family what was wrong, especially not Maggie, knowing full well she might put the boy in the hospital. The next day at school was even worse, with Jimmy having told their entire class that she'd been cheating on him. The problem with the only friends you have being met through your boyfriend, is that when you break up they're always going to side with him. So weeks passed with Beth being basically shunned by the whole school in a manner she thought only happened in movies, or those over dramatic television programmes on the effects of bullying. The cruelty quickly escalated from simply the silent treatment, to girls "accidentally" dumping their lunches on her head when they walked by. Eventually it reached the point that Jimmy's friends from the football team were actually roughing her up. No one ever hit her where it could be seen by her family or teachers, they might've been hicks, but they weren't completely stupid. And, with every incident where Beth didn't fight back, and every evening she'd didn't tell her parents, her self loathing grew and she spiralled deeper into darker places.
Eventually, when the emotional pain got to be too much, or when she couldn't manage to feel anything at all- not even human- she would take a razor to her wrists. Some nights it was a punishment for being such a coward, some nights she needed to feel something other than pain inside, and some nights, the worst nights, she just needed to feel anything. Anything at all. It was one of those nights of absolute numbness, her chest feeling so horrifyingly empty, that she took it too far. A part of her quiet, and hidden so deep in the back of her mind, knew that this wasn't the answer. It tried so hard to tell her that she was going to be destroying her family and any chance she had at finding happiness. But the stronger, less rational, part of her mind just wanted the pain and the emptiness to go away.
She'd only managed to slice vertically up the one wrist before Maggie managed to kick the door open, panic and horror all over her deathly pale face as she scrambled to stop the bleeding. The sound of her hysterically screaming for their parents to call an ambulance still haunted Beth's dreams. They'd put her in a mental hospital after that, reasonably so. But it didn't help so much as add on to the trauma. She guessed it did it's job however, as she was absolutely petrified to ever have to go back and thus never hurt herself again when she got out.
It didn't matter to her family that the hospital seemed to have done its job, that she was better. They never looked at her the same again. The leash became impossibly tight and even now, years later, she wasn't allowed to be home alone. Her parents and her sister watched her every move, her every mood. She wasn't simply treated like a child, she was treated like a child who also happened to be a ticking time bomb. So this day, this fight, was the final straw. And the tension snapped.
She screamed at her mother and father, she fought dirty with her sister and, finally, she left. With a final shout of: "Fuck this!" ( a word she'd never said before and that caused her mother to grab her chest as if she'd been struck), Beth stormed from the kitchen. She ignored her father's loud demands for her to come back and snatched the keys to Maggie's truck from where they'd been sitting on a small entryway table right by the door. She tore off the porch and through the grass, dirt kicking up behind her when she made it onto the red Georgia clay path that cut through the farm they called a driveway. She could hear her father standing on the porch still shouting after her, and she just knew that Maggie was hot on her tail.
Beth ripped the driver's side door open and launched her small form into the cab of the truck, slamming the door closed behind her with enough force that it caused the metal frame to shake. Her fingers were tight with tension as they slammed down onto the lock button on her door, just in time for Maggie- who hadn't even brought herself to a stop and chose to simply body slam the vehicle- to begin frantically pulling at the handle. Beth didn't even spare her a glance as she jammed the key into the ignition and turned it with more force than was probably needed. Her blonde hair was down and wet with sweat against her throat, tendrils clinging to it as well as her face and shoulders in a way that couldn't be attractive. She'd been in the truck for a total of maybe two minutes, not nearly enough time for the air conditioning to get cold, much less cool her flesh, and her thighs were already beginning to stick to the seats.
With one final glance at Maggie, Beth's blue eyes burning with rage and hurt as she took in her big sister, she threw the truck in reverse. She surged off the driveway and into the grass, Maggie barely jumping out of the way in time to avoid being hit as Beth turned the wheel sharply before throwing the gear shift into drive. Peeling down the driveway and onto the road that ran perpendicular to it, she didn't turn around once to grant her childhood home a final goodbye as she flew down the asphalt road, relief joining that rage and hurt. She was free.
It had been Maggie who'd taught her how to drive in her final act of camaraderie. Six months after her sixteenth birthday passed with no sign of relenting from her parents, Maggie snuck into her room. Her sister had crouched by her bed and shook her awake with a grin. She hadn't looked at her in that way in over a year. There had been no sign of pity or worry in her gaze, not even a glimpse of the overbearingly protective big sister. Her green eyes had simply sparkled with excitement and mischief as she'd told Beth her plan. The two girls had giggled as they slipped out of Beth's window and onto the roof, sharing mischievous smiles as they shimmied down the big oak tree they'd used to sneak out many nights in the past. Beth had furrowed her eyebrows when Maggie didn't press the button on the fob watch to unlock the door, rather doing it manually, before she realised that her big sister was worried the beep would wake their parents. Maggie'd climbed into the driver's seat and reached across to open the passenger door for her sister, who'd climbed in all shining blue eyes and rumpled pjs.
"I can't learn to drive without being behind the wheel, Mags." They were no longer in the house, and logically her parents wouldn't hear if she spoke at a normal volume, but the words were still whispered, as was Maggie's reply.
"I'm not gonna be able to teach you how to drive in secret in our driveway, Beth. We're gonna drive into town and find an empty parking lot, start slow." And so they did, radio off and not even speaking, but totally at peace. The cool night air knotted their hair as it streamed in through the opened windows, Beth sitting full of excitement and contentment as she watched the stars shine brightly and thought she'd finally gotten her sister back.
And yet here Beth was, driving but alone and bursting with anger, at Maggie most of all. Her sister had seemed like her old self for the month it had taken her to teach Beth how to drive- the younger girl had always been a quick learner, not to mention it being a small town with no complicated traffic or anything of the sort- until reality had come crashing back in. One day Maggie stopped their nightly lessons with no explanation and turned back into her third ridiculously overbearing parent. Beth had been holding out hope that there might still be a bit of an understanding between them. Apparently she was wrong.
Beth knew her family meant well, but she also knew that if she didn't get out of that house then she would go insane. Her eighteenth birthday was a week away, she'd lay low until then, let herself calm down, and then head back home as a legal adult. If things didn't change then she'd get a job instead of helping out at the farm so she could start saving money for an apartment.
Satisfied with her plan and having made sure that her dad's truck, he'd gotten it after giving this one to Maggie, wasn't behind her, Beth let herself relax. She rolled down the windows and, while the air wasn't exactly cool, it still helped take some of the heat off her skin. She knew her pale hair would be a mess when she finally stopped but she didn't care, enjoying the feel of the wind buffeting it and her loose plain grey tank too much. Beth had never been the reckless type, the only time she'd ever broken the rules was when Maggie used to drag her along on her more safe adventures. And yet here she sat, having technically stolen her sister's truck to run away for days with no money, no clothes, and no food. Crap. With a sigh she signaled to turn right and pulled into the parking lot of a gas station only ten miles from the farmhouse, deciding she at least needed to pick up some water bottles and cheap snacks to make it through the next few days.
Beth smiled gently at the man behind the register. She'd managed to find enough change in the seats and on the floor of the truck to buy some snacks and a few water bottles. The man was obviously tired, bags prominent under his eyes, but he managed to give her a small smile back. The sun was hot on her skin as she shoved the door to the convenience store open, the bell dinging above her head. She was staring down at the bags in her arms, wondering how she was going to manage to ration the minuscule amount in a way that it will last her the week till her birthday, rather than watching where she was going. As a result she ended up colliding with a hard chest and sprawled on her ass, her snacks flying from her grip.
"Ah, shit." A thickly southern accented voice drawled out just before a large outstretched hand appeared in her line of vision. "You alrigh'?" She took the hand without looking up, snatching her bags from the floor.
"Yeah, I'm okay! I'm so sorry, I wasn't lookin' where I was goin'." She smiled brightly as she looked up and her breath caught in her chest when she finally saw who she'd just body slammed. He was tall and broad, his arms roped with muscles that obviously came from surviving rather than hitting the gym or steroids like most of the boys at her school. He had close cropped brown hair and stubble on his chin and around his mouth. His eyes were cornflower blue and belayed his concern for her as he looked her up and down as if searching for an injury. When his brows started to furrow she realised she'd been staring at him for too long and flushed in embarrassment. "I didn't hurt you did I?"
He snorted and rolled his eyes, rubbing the back of his head. "Nah, you weigh 'bout as much as a kitten." Her face turned even redder at the comparison and she began fidgeting with the handles of her plastic bags.
"I really am sorry, I should've been lookin' where I was goin'."
"Don' worry 'bout it." He shrugged and gave her what she suspected was meant to be a smile before striding off to the counter and asking for a pack of marlboro reds. She stood there watching him for a few moments without even really realising she was doing so, but when the cashier sent her a weird look she shook herself from her stupor and pushed out into the Georgia heat.
She headed to her truck and unlocked the door, tossing her bags up to the passenger seat before climbing into the driver's seat. She settled in, closing and locking the door, and turned to look at her makeshift bed in the backseat. Maggie had kept blankets and pillows back there for stargazing in the truck bed. At least that's what she'd told their parents, but Beth suspected that she and her boyfriend tended to use them for something a bit more R rated than that. She'd originally tried sleeping in the bed of the truck the night before, but the heat and the mosquitoes had ended up being too much. She'd caved after about an hour and moved into the cab of the truck, stretching out as much as was possible along the back bench seat. She sighed at the disarrayed blankets and turned back around, leaning her head against the headrest. Honestly, sleeping in the backseat of a truck was still better than dealing with her family's suffocating, overbearing, ridiculousness.
She reached across the centre console and started rifling through the bags from the convenience store, deciding she better take stock and decide how best to ration. She wasn't able to afford much so the next few days were going to be a bit rough, but she'd survive. She watched the man she'd rammed into earlier exit the convenience store, his long legs crossing the parking lot with ease as he joined an even rougher looking man beside two motorcycles. He tossed the older man the pack of cigarettes he'd just bought, one already sticking out of his mouth and burning at the end, and sat down on the motorcycle that must've been his. He sat there, bringing the cigarette back and forth from his lips, and she sat there watching him, admiring him. He was the kind of guy her father would shoot when she brought him home, the kind her sister would chase off the farm with a knife. But that wasn't why she was attracted to him, no matter how badly she wanted to get back at her family. There was something inherently masculine about him. He was rugged and dangerous, but there was something in his eyes that told her he had a gentle soul.
Her fair skin flushed a vibrant red when she realised he had looked over in her direction at some point without her noticing, and was now staring back at her with furrowed brows. She quickly ducked her head, hair curtaining her face and providing a sense of privacy. Without looking up she started the truck, reversing out of her spot and zooming out of the parking lot and away from the embarrassing situation she'd somehow found herself in faster than she probably should. Especially since she was driving without a license. She grimaced at that thought and forced herself to focus on the road ahead of her and not how angry she was at her family or the strangely alluring man she was speeding away from.