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"Dyad's Blessing, Dyad's Curse"

By EsmeAmelia

Chapter 49

Poe stared bleary-eyed out the window at the city bathed in soft early dawn light. It probably wasn't a good idea to get up so early when he'd barely slept the night before, but what was the point of staying in bed when every time he closed his eyes he felt himself back on the interrogation table, those invisible hands prying through his mind . . .

He shuddered, knowing that he should try to sleep more so he'd be clear-minded for yet another day of negotiations, but was it really clearing his mind to keep going back there? Caf – he'd just need a good amount of caf and he'd be fine, right?

But caf didn't fix problems like their great hero apparently being in love with that monster.

He let out a long exhale, fogging up the window. Everyone deserved a second chance; he liked to think that he believed that. Hell, he'd even accepted General Hux's help of all people. Sure, he'd only helped them because he wanted to bring Kylo Ren down, but still. If he could accept Hux's help, surely he could accept Ben's help, especially since Rey kept insisting that Ben was truly changed.

Except Hux didn't torture Poe the way Kylo had . . .

"Poe? Are you okay?"

Poe gulped. "Sorry, Finn," he mumbled. "Didn't mean to wake you."

He felt his friend's comforting arm wrapping around his shoulders. "The dream again?"

Poe gave a hesitant nod, glancing at the carpeted floor. "I do wanna believe Rey that he's all changed, but . . ."

"I know," said Finn, stroking his shoulder. "I've got my doubts too."

Poe yawned, his head drooping to rest on Finn's shoulder. "I wanna do the right thing, you know . . . but 'm not sure what the right thing is . . ."

Finn took a deep breath, his shoulder gently rising and falling under Poe's head. "Well, keeping quiet about Rey's relationship with Ben is probably one of the right things."

Poe closed his eyes, feeling like he could fall asleep standing up in Finn's arms. Maybe the dream wouldn't return if he did. "Sorry things didn't work out with her."

"What?"

"C'mon, I saw the way you looked at her." He yawned again. "Sometimes we fall for people who just don't love us back. Happened to me with Zorii . . . it'll probably happen to me again."

"All right, I think we should go back to bed."

"Don't wanna," Poe mumbled, though by now he was more asleep than awake.

"Well you don't want to fall asleep during the meeting, do you?"

Poe didn't answer, but he also didn't protest as Finn led him back to bed.

. . .

Again Ben was led to the prison counselor's room where again both the counselor and breakfast were waiting for him. "What's going on?" he asked as soon as the guards removed his binders, though there was a sinking feeling in his stomach that this had to do with last night.

The counselor Krain was giving him a way-too-friendly smile. "Ben, don't worry. We all care about your well-being."

Ben couldn't stop his teeth from grinding. "This is about last night, isn't it? You think I'm crazy!"

"No, you're not crazy," said Krain, keeping that calm demeanor. "Your mind is simply using a coping mechanism."

"Coping mechanism?"

"Yes," Krain said with a nod. "It's nothing to be ashamed of. This construction in your mind could be a result of the immense guilt that you're feeling."

"Construction in my mind?"

Now the doctor was looking him in the eye, his yellow eyes wide with sympathy. "Ben, I know this is difficult to hear, but your mind needs to know the truth in order to heal. You're not the first person here to suffer hallucinations . . ."

"I'm not hallucinating!" Ben yelled, though in the back of his mind, part of him wondered if seeing Rey's parents leave counted as hallucinating.

The counselor let out a sigh through his nose as he looked at his datapad. "Ben, last night a guard saw you talking to that Jedi Rey and wrapping your arms around nothing." He looked back up at Ben, seeming to put all his effort into making his face compassionate. "She wasn't here last night, Ben. Your mind is creating visions of her."

Ben wanted to leap out of his seat and storm out of the room – the effort to keep himself from doing so caused his hands to shake in his lap and his upper arms to tense up almost to the point of pain. "I'm not delusional," he said, forcing himself to sound as calm as humanly possible. "You can prescribe all the medications you want, but it won't stop Rey from appearing to me."

"All right," said Krain. "Can you explain why that is?"

"You won't believe me," Ben said in a hard voice.

"Well why don't you explain anyway?"

Ben took a deep breath, feeling the guards' stares on him, sensing them preparing to shoot him in case he tried anything. He couldn't tell anyone about the dyad . . . he'd be institutionalized for sure . . . but then again, was a mental hospital really any worse than where he was now?

"Fine," he said in a sharp voice, "I'll tell you. The Force has me bonded with Ben and he appears to me periodically."

"Bonded with Ben?" Krain asked quizzically, tilting his head.

"I . . . AUGH, not again!" Ben leaned forward, squeezing his head as if that would fix his memory. "I'm . . . my parents are . . . I'm not Rey, I'm NOT!"

. . .

"Friend!" D-O squealed when he and Rey reached Ben's cell. He rolled as close to the forcefield as the guard would allow and craned his neck up to look at Ben.

"Hey, D-O," said Ben, smiling at the droid. "How are you doing?"

"F-Fine," said D-O, rolling back and forth. "A-are you all right?"

Ben sighed, looking up at Rey with a forlorn expression. "Rey, did you have one of those memory lapses today?"

Rey frowned, not wanting to think about how when she was repeating her name to herself at breakfast, she had briefly thought My name is Ben as if it were the most natural thing in the world. "Yes," she admitted, "it was just for a moment, but I thought I was you."

Ben's mouth hung open slightly. "I had a lapse too – I'm guessing we have these lapses at the same time – but mine was in front of the prison counselor." His breath was shortening as he gazed into her eyes. "Now he thinks I have disassociation and wants me to have hypnotherapy!"

"Hypnotherapy?" Rey exclaimed in a low whisper. "What did you say?"

"I said no, there's no way I'm gonna let anyone hypnotize me!" Ben's voice grew into a loud snarl, his eyes narrowing as if the counselor was here with them. "I'm not letting more voices into my head after what Palpatine and Snoke pulled and how I let them lure me into . . . into . . ." He broke into a sob, burying his face in his hands.

Rey gulped, wishing she could get rid of the forcefield and give him a hug. "Ben, hypnotherapy wouldn't be like that." She sucked in a small gasp as an idea suddenly came to her. "What if . . . what if we both had hypnotherapy together?"

Ben slowly looked back up at her, his glistening eyes apparent even through the forcefield. "What?"

"Just hear me out. We don't know how to control this thing, the Jedi texts have no answers, and the Jedi ghosts aren't telling us anything. Maybe going into an altered state of consciousness together will help us find answers."

"An altered state of consciousness," Ben spat. "Like meditation? I've never been good at that."

Rey gave him the softest smile she could manage. "This would be different – and I'd be with you." She held out her hand as if asking him to take it. "We'd be together."

"Together," Ben murmured, slowly reaching out his own hand. Their hands stopped at the forcefield, but Rey concentrated on sending him calming thoughts through the Force of their hands actually touching.

"H-help you," D-O said.

Ben closed his eyes, steadying his breath before opening them again and gazing into Rey's eyes. "All right," he whispered, his voice still trembling, "I'll do it."