And for part two of my update! Don't worry about the walker fights, that's in the next Woodbury chapter, I promise...Thought this one was longer than it actually ended up being, but still it is what it is...
"Rick?" Daryl said as he knelt in front of Rick trying to get his attention and failing. "You with me?"
"He's in shock," Tea said taking the baby from Maggie. "I don' even think 'e can hear ya right now, D."
"Let me see the baby," Hershel said, prompting Tea and Carl to walk over to him.
"What are we gonna feed it?" Daryl asked, trying not to freak out all over again at the sight of a baby in Ania's arms. "We got anything a baby can eat?"
They had to keep this baby alive. It didn't matter how, they just had to. The two of them shared a look, both understood the determination and agreed to do nothing less than give their lives if that's what it took to keep this little baby girl alive and well. They both had felt a sense of longing at the thought of having a child, and that pull was now being felt towards the baby nestled in her arms. Might not be their baby, but this baby was going to be adored, looked after, and well cared for as long as they lived, which was going to be a long ass time. Tea held the baby just a little loser so that Hershel could take a look.
"The good news is she looks healthy. But she needs formula," he told them, looking to Daryl. "And soon or she won't survive."
"Nope. No way. Not her," Daryl said, freaking out over the thought of losing a dreamed of baby on top of a real baby. "We ain't losin' nobody else. I'm goin' for a run."
"I'm stayin', I can' leave Rick, Carl, Phia, or the baby," Tea told him to which he only nodded and kissed her on the forehead.
"I'll back you up," Maggie said, needing to do something to keep Lori's sacrifice worthwhile.
"I'll go too," Glenn said.
"Okay, think where we're goin'," he told them. "Beth," he motioned for the young blonde and walked off.
Whispering to her, he said, "Kid just lost his mom. His dad ain't doin' so hot. Phia's mom's missin' and Ania's dead on her feet and prolly in a lot a pain right now."
"I'll look out for them, though I'm not sure how much Tea will let me help her," Beth told him sincerely.
"Just tell 'er I told you to."
Tea was still standing next to Hershel, looking down at the baby in her arms. It needed to be bathed and properly swaddled. Thank the gods for all the babysittin' I did for me colleagues back in Atlanta, she thought. They didn't have diapers at the moment, but they had enough towels thanks to the laundry that she could make makeshift diapers. After dealing with the reusable kind, making a diaper out of nothing would be easy.
"Oscar, Axel, ya gonna be on fence duty," Tea told the men, coming to her senses and getting back into leader mode, thankful Daryl seemed to be stepping into the co-leader role nicely now that Rick was out of it.
"Too many pile up," he explained for her, "we got ourselves a problem. Glenn, Maggie, vamonos."
The sound of metal clinking on cement caused them all to look over. Rick had grabbed the ax and was storming his way up into the cell block, undoubtedly heading for the tombs. Maggie went to stop him, but Tea called out to her.
"Jus' let 'im go, Mags," she told the woman, handing the baby to Carl. "More important things ta worry 'bout. Oscar, Axel, get the damn gate."
"Come on, we're gonna lose the light!" Daryl impatiently yelled at them.
"There's a Piggly Wiggly on 85," Glenn suggested while he, Maggie, Daryl, and Tea were running toward the cars.
"No, the baby section's been cleared," Maggie said. "Tea's had us looking since she found out about the pregnancy. We've got a couple blankets and a few sets of clothes, but that's it."
"Is there any place that hasn't been completely looted?" Daryl asked as he took his crossbow off.
"We saw signs for a shopping center just north of here," Glenn said.
"Yeah, but there's too much debris on the road," Maggie said. "A car will never get through there."
"I can take one a ya," Daryl suggested, not even phased at the idea of riding with a dude behind him. The baby was more important.
"I'll go," Maggie said quietly.
Glenn went over and whispered to her as she and Daryl walked to his bike. He attached his crossbow to the makeshift mount they'd made on either side of the rear hub specifically for their weapons. She pulled out his poncho, knowing it was getting chilly out. Pulling it over his head, Tea leaned in and gave him a quick kiss before he mounted and started up the bike. She gave him another kiss Maggie and Glenn walked over and then stepped back beside Glenn. They both watched as their lovers rode out of the prison before silently returning to the courtyard above.
Tea took the baby back from Carl and led them inside the commons and over to the above ground fire pit she'd had Daryl grab from one of the stores when they'd gotten the clothes. The shopping center they'd ended up at still had a few things for summer, like grills and charcoal, so Tea had grabbed a bunch of that, too. In the end, the car had been loaded with clothes, blankets, and the fire pit in the back with every bag of charcoal she could find in the backseat. Apparently, she had a plan to keep people warmer this winter, and it involved charcoal and fire pits.
"Beth, get some wata boilin'. Not a lot, jus' 'nough ta make a bottle when they get back and give Little Lady a bath," she told the girl, not willing to set the baby down for a second. "Phia, Carl, Imma need ya ta get me some towels from the laundry, okay? As many wash clothes and hand towels as ya can carry, a couple larga ones too. Can ya do that for me?" she asked the boy gently. "Glenn, I want ya on watch. Oscar, Axel, I need ya at the gates and on the perimeta. Need ya doin' double duty standin' watch at the gates when they get back and ta clear out as many walkas on the fence line as ya can," she told them men, handing them each a knife from her stash and ushering them out. "Hershel?"
"Is there anythin' we can give her 'til they get back?" Tea asked him. "She has ta live, Hershel. I can' lose her. Not when," she was unable to finish the sentence as she thought about what could have been as well as the way she and Lori had been at the end.
"You can give her your finger," Hershel told the vulnerable woman. "But we don't have anything here she that can help her survive aside from comfort."
"I had ta ask," she said, silent tears streaming from her eyes.
"What's wrong, child?" Hershel said, noticing that there was a pain in her eyes as she looked at the child.
"Daryl thought...with how I've been sick. We were kinda hopin'. And we aren' and that's fine and good, but now there's a baby here and I don', I can'," she just shook her head not really knowing what she wanted to say.
"It's difficult, hoping for a child but not getting one," the man told her. "I understand that well. My wife and I, we tried for years for Maggie. Gave up before we found out we were expecting. There were a lot of times we thought she was and were hopeful."
"I didn' even realize how much I wanted it 'til I saw her," Tea admitted quietly, looking at the babe in her arms. "I thought it was a good thing I wasn', gave me and Daryl more time ta think it ova and all that. It hurt ta think the possibility was gone, but it wasn' anythin' like it is now. Seein' 'er. It's like me heart's been ripped from me damn chest an' bein' stomped on. An' I feel guilty 'cause I wasn' on good terms with Lori. And for T-Dog. If I'd jus' a paid a bit more attention ta me surroundin's, he'd be here. Everythin's pilin' up and Daryl's not here ta keep me from crashin' and the baby is and I jus', I jus'."
Her breathing hitched as she broke down, holding the baby close as Hershel wrapped an arm around her. She was exhausted, he could tell. Running on fumes and doing her best to take everything in stride. In his opinion, this was what made her a better leader than Rick. While Rick pushed himself to the brink too, it wasn't the same as when Tea did. Rick pushed himself when it came to security; whether it was keeping the group safe or maintaining a perimeter he'd exhaust himself and was always the last to eat or sleep. Tea, on the other hand, pushed herself in every way without backing down. He remembered when she'd gone nearly three days without sleep to help Carol during the winter simply because the woman had rolled her ankle. Instead of delegating Carol's responsibilities to others, she'd taken up the extra duties on top of everything else. She probably would have stayed up even longer if it hadn't have been for Daryl throwing her over his shoulder, literally, and taking her back to the storage unit they were sharing. Her compassion and her intellect, as well as how strongly she felt about the group, drove her to work harder than Rick, and Hershel noticed.
"Tea?" Beth called from outside the cell. "The water's ready for a bath and Carl and Sophia just got back."
And there she was, the Tea everyone knew, the leader. Hardly anyone knew what she looked like breaking down as far as Hershel knew, only him and obviously Daryl. There was no trace of her tears left on her face and the only sign of distress he could see was the redness in her eyes as she held the baby close and walked out of the cell. Hershel understood enough about her condition to know that her mind just didn't do emotion if there was something to concentrate on, but it was still a little off-putting to see. Watching her go from full on sobbing to simply taking a breath and wiping her face seemingly fine was like watching a caterpillar cocoon and turn into a butterfly in the span of a minute. Beautiful, awe inspiring and terrifying all at once. That was an excellent way to describe their female leader.
~x~
Glenn was outside digging graves when the inmates walked up. He had to admit, Tea was right about them being useful, especially right now when Rick was out of it, Tea was busy with the baby, and Daryl wasn't here. He and Beth were the only ones really able to keep watch without these two. But that's how Tea had convinced him and Maggie in the first place. Of course she had managed to predict a scenario like this, albeit not an attack from a living person. 'What if walkas get inta the prison and we gotta scatta? What happens if we lose people? We gonna sit with our asses hangin' out or are ya gonna trust me and bring those men inta the fold ta help keep us safe?' Damn if she was right.
"How's the perimeter look?" he asked them quietly.
"We got the walkers spread out," Axel said. "Need help?"
Glenn just looked at the man before walking back to the grave. They had no clue what he had just lost. T-Dog had been a brother, Lori a sister, and Carol had practically been everyone's aunt or mom with how she took care of them. He'd spent nights on watch with T-Dog and had learned how to sew from Carol. They were gone and this man had asked if Glenn wanted help? He was barely controlling his anger, let alone everything else that was going on in his head.
"Your friends," Axel said. "They, they were good folks."
"They were family," he said, giving the man a hard stare; over the winter, they'd all taken Tea's hard stance on family.
"I think had one friend like that my whole life," Oscar said. "You got a whole group. Sorry you lost 'em."
Glenn still couldn't say anything. The loss was hitting him too hard, and the looks on Rick, Carl, and Sophia's faces were heartbreaking. Tea wasn't faring too well either, and all this happening after she'd been sick with a stomach bug that never seemed to end. It was overwhelming and he wasn't sure what to do or how he could handle the situation if Rick and Tea both were down. So many thoughts were swimming in his head that he didn't know how to get them out. God, this is what Tea feels like? he thought, remembering how she'd described the reason she sometimes wasn't able to talk. 'How can ya talk when ya got bees buzzin' 'bout in ya mind, mixin' all ya thoughts 'til ya can' make heads or tails a 'em?' she asked him. Yeah, that's definitely how he felt at the moment. He saw Hershel coming to stand at the gate and gave the shovel to Axel.
"I need two more," he told them before walking over to Hershel. "Rick?"
"Still inside."
"Okay, I'll get him."
"Be careful," Hershel warned him. "Tea thinks he might be in some sort of psychotic breakdown. Said he might not realize who you are and if that happens to tell her."
"Okay," Glenn sighed, looking back at the inmates. "A third of our group in one day."
"'Cause of one asshole," Hershel agreed.
"Part of me wishes that we'd killed all the prisoners on sight," he admitted, knowing both Maggie and Tea would be upset with him if they ever found out.
"Axel and Oscar seem like good guys," Hershel said. "And you know Tea wouldn't have spoken up for them if they weren't."
"You know, when the evacuations started," Glenn told the man with a heavy breath, "T-Dog drove his church van to the home of every senior he kenw just in case they needed a ride. He saved my ass a thousand times. He wasn't just a good guy. He was the best."
"Got bit closing the gate, sacrificed himself to get Tea and Sophia to safety, Carol too until they got separated. If he hadn't done that," Hershel left it hanging.
"It could have been Maggie," Glenn finished for him. "It's wrong, but I'd trade any number of people for one of ours any day."
"I'm pretty sure Tea shares that sentiment," Hershel told him as he held the lad's hand through the fence before letting him walk away.
Glenn walked into the tombs, following a trail of walkers. All of them had skulls that had been split open. There had to have been nearly two dozen walkers on the floor before he heard any sound. It came in the form of raspy breaths, and as he shone his light into the room, he damn near jumped at the sight in front of him.
"Rick?" The man was breathing heavy and covered in blood as Glenn cautiously approached. "Everybody's worried about you. You shouldn't be in here. Come on out." Rick just stood there before looking down. Maneuvering around him so that he could see his eyes, Glenn called again, "Rick. You don't have to do this all by yourself. Okay? Our cell block's cleared. We'll just close off all the doors again. Rick, why don't you just come out with me?" he asked the man softly. Rick's eyes hadn't quite focused on him at all since he walked into the room. "Okay? Rick?" he made the mistake of touching the man.
Rick had him against the wall and was practically growling in his face. Glenn had his hands up in surrender; so this was what Tea meant by be careful. He kept his hands up as Rick stared at him, looking at him from various angles as if trying to figure out who he was. Eventually Rick grabbed him by the back of his neck and practically threw him towards where he'd come in from. He didn't even say anything to Glenn, just gave him a look before walking away.
Glenn practically ran back to the cell block to find Tea, "He's not doing so hot."
"What happened?" Glenn gave her a summary of what happened and how Rick had behaved as she sat nodding her head, "I feared that would happen."
"Do you want me to take the baby so you can go talk to him?" Glenn asked.
"No," Tea said immediately. "There's no damn use in talkin' ta him right now. It's a brief psychotic disorda and I ain' got any meds ta sedate 'im or help 'im through it and I can' 'xactly lock 'im up. 'Specially not in here. So alls I can do is let 'im go through it right now and when it shows signs of gettin' past the rage-fueled psychosis and inta the grief-fueled, then I can be a help. It ain' gonna last foreva, Glenn. Few weeks at most, less 'e's a family history with psychosis. Then it's all up ta his brain ta decide how long it'll last, or if it comes back. But ya can take the Little Lady for a bit while I go check on the kids."
She had him wash his hands before handing the bundle over, telling him to let the babe suck on his finger if she started crying. It wouldn't work forever, but it was working for now. Carl, Sophia, and Beth were in Beth's cell drawing. Tea had made it her mission to keep them all provided with art supplies so that at least they had something they could still be imaginative with. It made her happy that when things were looking so down, the kids could at least still draw and color.
"How ya doin'?" she asked them.
"We're alright," Beth answered.
Tea nodded her head before pulling Carl out of the room by himself. Giving him another hug, she asked, "Ya wanna talk 'bout it?" He shook his head no. "Ya wanna hold ya sista?" Another no, but he was holding onto her and shaking now. "Ya jus' wanna stay like this for a few and then go back ta bein' the big strong man ya showin' ta the girls?" A nod of his head had her hold him just a little tighter to her.
A few minutes later, he pulled away from her, wiped his eyes as they stood for a minute or two longer, and then they went back into the room as if they had just been talking. She pulled Sophia out of the room and, just like with Carl, immediately pulled her into a hug.
"How ya doin', Phia?"
"Do you think my mom's alive?" she asked timidly.
"I know it. Ain' no damn way she's gone. She's got too much ta live for and she ain' eva leavin' ya if she don' have ta," Tea told the girl seriously. "Ya can stick with me 'til she gets back, but ya don' even for a second give up on 'er. Ya rememba how much it hurt when ya thought she gave up on ya?" Sophia nodded her head. "Don' be doin' that ta her. Got it?" Another nod. "Good. Ya wanna go back ta drawin' or ya wanna get some rest? Ya look right awful snookered."
"Do you ever talk normal?" Glenn quipped from beside them as he came over to check on Beth himself.
"What? I can' help that I liked a lot of British shows. 'Sides, accents are hot. Nothin' like a good British accent ta get ya goin'," she said with a wink at him, watching as his cheeks tinged pink.
"So what about Daryl's accent?" Beth asked innocently.
"Sexiest a 'em all," was the immediate reply.
~x~
Daryl and Maggie pulled up to the day care and shut the bike off. As they dismounted, Daryl warned, "Company's close. Stay tight."
Maggie pulled the fence open and Daryl walked in, keeping an eye out for walkers. They hadn't exactly gone in the front door, so Maggie used her gun to bust open a window. She looked around as Daryl climbed into the room, taking a moment to look at all the names on the wall, pausing when he saw all the children's names. He walked the opposite direction Maggie was going as they scouted the place out. Walking into another room, he spotted a little doll that reminded him of Sophia's back at the prison, tucked away on her bed, and grabbed it up. The baby would need a toy.
The sound of scratching alerted both Maggie and Daryl and they cautiously moved towards each other, meeting in the middle where they had heard the scratching grow louder. It was coming from the kitchen. Daryl held his flashlight in his mouth as he slowly opened the half door and took position by the fridge. He motioned for Maggie to open the door next to the entrance of the kitchen; it was either a shelved cupboard or a walk in cupboard, but something inside it was moving. Daryl took aim as Maggie stepped over. It took a moment for her apprehension to subside enough for her to open the door. An opossum hissed at them as Daryl fired his bolt.
"Hello dinner," he mumbled around his light, earning a disgusted look from Maggie.
"I'm not putting that in my bag," she told him.
"Tea would," he quipped.
"Yeah, well, Tea's a freak," she sighed.
"Don't fuckin' call her that!" Daryl growled at her, taking to large steps in her direction as his anger flared.
"Jesus, Daryl, sorry!" she said a little scared, forgetting how defensive the man was any time anyone said something negative about Tea, even if it wasn't meant overly negatively. "You know I didn't mean anything by it other than that Tea ain't like most women."
"Tea ain't like most people," he said.
"True, she's definitely got an interesting way of thinking," Maggie said. "Shoulda heard the argument she made for the inmates."
"Same way as me, I s'ppose," he mumbled, still a bit miffed at the young woman.
"Argued that if an attack happened, we could use a couple extra sets of hands looking out for the group," she shrugged. "She made it sound much more compelling."
"Yeah, she's got a way with words," he grumbled.
"Are you okay?"
"M'fine," he gruffed, allowing the silence to fall between them again; Maggie should have known she wouldn't get him to talk. It seemed like only Tea could get Daryl to open up.
He wasn't fine and he knew it. Daryl was on edge being so far away from Ania after everything. But he had to make sure that baby was taken care of. Not just for the baby, but for Ania and for himself. She'd finally been able to admit it, even if it had just been in a look. That she'd longed for one just as much as he had after he got scared. Now they had a tiny baby they needed to take care of and that longing had just grown exponentially. And he had to go back to that prison and see her carrying that babe around some more. He wasn't sure which was worse, the longing for a baby or the longing the image of her with one in her arms caused.
Unfortunately, they couldn't get too much from the place, but a few large cans of formula, some reusable diapers, bottles, a few pacifiers and the doll and opossum from Daryl was enough for now. They'd have to make a run tomorrow for there to be anything that could last at the prison. It was well past dark when they finally got back. Glenn was watching at the guard tower as Axel made noise to get the walkers' attention while Oscar opened the gate. They'd left the ones behind open so that the motorcycle could go straight through.
They both practically ran into the commons, Daryl momentarily pausing as he heard Ania singing softly to the baby that was beginning to start fussing more than her finger could comfort. She had wrapped the girl in a fuzzy blanket, and was swaying side to side to the rhythm of the song she sang. For a second, his mind conjured up an image of a green eyed, dark haired baby nestled in her arms before it returned to the blonde and blue eyed child that was actually there. As Maggie called to Beth, he went straight to Ania, throwing off his poncho and setting down his bow.
"How's she doin'?" he asked her.
"Fuckin' hungry and startin' ta fuss up a storm," Ania said.
"Give 'er here," he said, carefully taking the babe from his lover's arms.
Tea was more than happy to hand the crying baby over. Crying was never something she enjoyed and as much as she enjoyed holding the baby when she was calm or she could get she to stop fussing quickly but when it was crying like a banshee? Nope, get it out of her arms. But the irritation at the baby's cries were thrown out the window as she got a good look at Daryl with the baby in his arms. Her breath was lost to her when the baby started cooing at him. When Beth handed him the bottle and he started feeding her, Tea damn near jizzed in her pants. How the hell can one man be so damn perfect? she thought to herself. Daryl locked eyes with her then, a proud smile on his face as he held the baby in his arms. If her breath had been lost before, she simply didn't know how to breath now. She decided that this was his best smile, and that one way or another, she would do anything to get him to smile like that again.
"She got a name yet?" he asked Carl as Tea came to stand beside him, one hand on the small of his back, the other gently rubbed the baby's head.
"Not yet," Carl replied. "But Tea's been calling her Little Lady. And I've been thinking about names. I was thinking maybe Jesse? Or Carol, too. And Andrea, Amy, Jacqui, Patricia, or...Lori. I don't know."
"Yeah," Daryl sighed, looking down at the baby. "Huh? Ya like that? Huh? Little ass-kicker. Right, that's a good name, right?" he looked around the room earning chuckles. "Little ass-kicker, you like huh? You like that sweetheart?"
~x~
They lay together in bed later that evening, images of Ania holding Little Ass-kicker flooding Daryl's brain. His arm was holding her tightly to him, unable to think about anything other than the past 24 hours and everything he'd felt. He'd felt as if he lost a child with her, felt as if he had lost her. They'd both become friends with Carol the last couple of weeks, and now she was gone, too. They had Sophia sleeping on their top bunk, the little girl didn't want to be alone and Ania wouldn't let her out of her sight anyway. She felt guilty for not keeping Carol safe and so, like she had on the highway, she took the little girl under her wing. And then those images, those damned images, just wouldn't stop playing in his mind. Could be mine in her arms one day, he thought as he looked down at her sleeping face.
He watched her sleeping often. Insomnia had been an issue he dealt with long before the apocalypse, but now at least he had something he wanted to watch the hours away. The mask of indifference she wore during the day melted away into a relaxed, small smile every night. She would regularly rub her face against his chest before breathing deeply and sighing, making him squeeze her just a little tighter every time. Daryl still couldn't believe that she was his. Twelve years his junior, a woman of learning, of the law, and he held her in his arms every night. If Merle was here, he'd surely have an aneurysm. Neither of them were worthy of a woman like Ania, yet he had her. Sometimes it still felt like a dream to him.
The baby cried in the night and she jerked awake. She sat up, quickly leaving the bed and heading to Beth and Hershel's cell. Tea knew that Beth was eager to do something in the group, seeing as she had the least experience in fighting. But the girl was only seventeen and a baby was a lot of responsibility. Tea didn't even notice Daryl leaving the cell behind her until she had the baby in her arms. She turned around and saw him readying a bottle. She smiled as she changed the diaper to a dry one, thankful Maggie had grabbed some disposable ones for night time and humming softly to the little girl. Daryl came over to her and offered to take the baby and feed her, but Tea wasn't quite ready to stop holding the little thing. Got myself some competition, he thought peacefully, smiling as he watched his woman and the baby.
"You're good with her," he commented.
"So were ya. Damn near made me ovaries explode," she told him, not even bothering to blush because it was true.
"Should see yourself with 'er," he replied, his gaze soft and tender.
"Ya should get some sleep."
"You need it more."
"We both need it," she chuckled, rocking the babe as it ate.
The little girl fell asleep as she finished the bottle, Tea carefully bringing her up to her shoulder and burping her. After getting two good belches from the babe, she returned her to the box they were currently using to bed the girl. Hand in hand, she and Daryl returned to their cell and laid back down.
"You think," Daryl started, but wasn't sure he wanted to continue the question, simply letting his hand splay out across her stomach.
"We got time," she answered him anyway. "Ya ain' even fordy, D. Ya got 'bout anotha twenny years at least ta knock me up so long as ya dick don' go limp. Let's jus' call this a practice run."
He chuckled at her, "Practice run? You gotta be shittin' me. Already got 'mom' written all over you."
"Yeah? Well, I can say the same thing ta ya, Daddy D."
"Don't," he rasped out, the sound of her calling him that heading straight to his growing erection.
"I'll save that one for a lata date, then, yeah?" she smirked up at him as she leaned in and captured his lips for a searing kiss before nestling down in his arms and falling back into a blissful sleep.
Updated 9/8/21