A/N: Of course I'm back with a new story right when school starts again and as if I don't have a whole novel to edit and a whole bunch of other fanfic stories I haven't gotten to :)
Either way this should be nothing new to me or anyone else. However AOT has truly consumed me recently and season four Eren has my heart so of course I had to write an Eren/Oc fanfic after discovering there are very few stories out there to fulfill my need. So please enjoy!
P.S: If any of my twilight fanfic readers are here, pretend you didn't see this story. (Jk i'll update soon I'm almost done with the next chapter).
Chapter One
Year 854
The Marley military headquarters in Liberio was always a sight to see even after all these years that Lilith Roth had been granted access inside. The floors were checkered marble, walls made of the finest wood, and carpet the plushest material. A prime example of the amount of finances put into their military while the Eldians barely saw a dime.
A reminder why she despised the men before her.
Lilith wasn't sure when she'd begun to hate the brass- commanders, generals, and the military personnel of Marley. Perhaps it'd begun the moment she volunteered as a warrior candidate all those years ago. Or maybe the day her mother had died. No. It'd probably been the day she did become a warrior- the day that started her lifelong torture.
"You did well." Lilith closed her eyes at the sound of the voice.
Her hands clenched behind her back at the useless compliment. Though Lilith had indeed helped successfully win the war for Marley, she hadn't done much. The past year had been nothing but a test, a trial and error to see if she was worth keeping alive or not. And while she did indeed prove herself, she knew this was only the beginning.
"You passed all of the tests conducted since your return earlier. Our scientists are rather boastful in your flying colors." General Russel continued on, eyeing her from the head of the table. "You might as well be an authentic titan shifter. That devil Ymir must be rolling in her grave."
Lilith forced a smile to her lips, bowing her head slightly to allow the light of the room to catch on her fiery hair. "Thank you, General." When she straightened back up dozens of prying eyes stared back at her from the long table she stood in front of.
The older man hummed slightly, his severe face scrunching in thought. "And what of you?" At her silence he went on. "What do you think of your performance the past year?"
If there were simple words to describe it, Lilith didn't know. The Mid-East War had been a long four years. And while Lilith had only spent a year or so stuck in the scrimmage of it, she had felt it's toll. Had suffered nightmares because of what she'd seen- what she'd done.
"I don't believe I'm certified to answer that, sir." At his frown, Lilith made sure to keep her chin high. To not fumble in the face of these men.
"Really? Well Commander Magath here believes you did as well as seasoned warriors. Even in comparison to Zeke Yeager and Reiner Braun."
The man in question sat towards the middle of the table, arms crossed over his broad chest. When he caught her eye, his head bobbed to nod at her, dark cropped hair shining in the light at the action. As if to say 'agree'.
Lilith tried not to grit her teeth. "He thinks too highly of me."
The general eyed her darkly from where he rested his face on top of his holded hands. From her angle she could make out where his greying hair was thinning, combed over in a poor attempt to hide it. She wondered when he would finally retire, or hopefully die. Perhaps in her lifetime if she were lucky.
She could only hope though. It wasn't like he was ever in the frontline, always hiding behind helpless Eldians while they gave their lives for a country that would never fully accept them.
"I see." He said finally after a long moment. "Then I believe we're done here. You may return home. I know it's been a long day."
"Thank you, General." Her hands moved by muscle memory, offering a salute to the men in the room before beginning to head towards the door.
It was only then, when her booted feet had barely made it to the doorway, that a voice rang out once more. "Lilith." She turned back to the aging man with a blank stare. "Your ability is still to be kept under wraps. We've already informed the rest of the soldiers. You're our best chance at taking enemies by surprise and the less word gets out, the better. We may need you again soon enough."
For the war against Paradise.
His unsaid words were obvious enough. It had been four years since the undercover invasion to the Eldian island, and since then there had been strain on what would happen next- who would make the first move and when it would be.
And Lilith would be their trump card. A new titan unlike any others. One made not by Ymir's will but by experiments to replace the captive female titan stuck on Paradise. Something unnatural.
Lilith glanced over the faces of the men looking at her expectantly. All dark and self fulfilling. Greedy in their use of her. Only Commander Magath looked away at the sight of her, eyes lowering to his hands.
"Yes, General."
"You're dismissed."
Like she was being chased out, Lilith left without another word out of the room, passing by Marleyan soldiers eyeing her distastefully and out of the building entirely. When she made it outside, the sun was already far beyond the horizon, the air nipping at her heels and the moon silent over her. For a moment she allowed herself a moment to finally still, gulping down a deep breath like she was deprived, her shoulders slumping as if under a weight.
It was only then she allowed her facade to drop, ignoring the stare of the guards at the gate further ahead when she released a shuddering sigh.
Like a ghost she could still feel the prick of needles entering her skin, of her limbs being pulled apart and her body dissected. Feel the warmth of her blood leaking and her tears falling. And then like a mirage, a gust of wind blew past her and Lilith was reminded of where she was and let it go in the breeze.
When she left the military headquarters, she didn't spare it another look back as she stepped out it's gates.
At night Liberio was nearly deserted. An empty place with buildings towering over her and too much silence. It was already a small town as it was, but in the darkness there were nothing but shadows and the whisper of the wind, even worse inside the internment camp.
The Marleyan guard at the gates had recognized her the moment she made it there, taking in her red arm patch and letting her through without a single word. Lilith seemed to shrink at the sight before her, watching the metal gates open to reveal the empty street, no one awaiting her like she was sure it had been earlier for the others.
She could still hear Gabi's loud scream when they'd finally all stepped foot off the train, the rest of the children just as happy. While Lilith was sure the others were the same, her fellow warriors had been more subdued.
Pieck's slight smile. Zeke's dry humor. Porco's grinning face. Reiner's thoughtful gaze.
Happiness hadn't been the right word to describe them. It was relief- at the simple fact that they were still alive, content to be home and see their family while Lilith dreaded it. Dreaded what awaited her back at the military headquarters and the empty house when she finally got to her apartment.
Walking down the silent streets only solidified the empty feeling in her chest. Made her feel numb when she finally did come across her simple apartment and opened up the door expecting to find darkness.
"Ah, there she is!"
Lilith stilled at the doorway, warm light engulfing her from lit lanterns and a fire cracking in the hearth. Before her, in the dining room were four figures, all sitting around her table with drinks before them and smiling faces facing her. The rest of the Warriors.
"About time you got here." Porco waved at her from his spot closest to the fire.
Lilith blinked. "What are you guys doing here?" She questioned, mouth slack at the group resting casually in her apartment.
"We wanted to surprise you." Pieck said, smiling at her warmly. "Welcome home, Lilith."
At the sound of those words, all other questions seemed to leave her mind. It didn't matter any long why they were there or how they'd even gotten inside. Only those words remained as a glossiness began coating her eyes, hand falling away from the handle of the door. When was the last time she'd come home to anyone and heard that?
Lilith had never considered herself an emotional person usually. But this…
She tried to keep her voice even. "I'm home."
When she closed the door she didn't bother hiding the soft spill of tears, wiping them away when she faced her companions again. They were aware enough not to comment on it, instead allowing room for her at the table with more words of greeting.
"Hopefully you don't mind us barging in." Reiner commented, bringing the glass before him to his lips. In the dim light the dark circles around his eyes seemed to be more prominent. "I bought some leftover food as recompense from my family's dinner earlier."
"Thank goodness." Lilith faintly muttered, leaning back in her seat. "I'm starving."
"I hope you bought enough for the rest of us, Braun." Porco warned, arms crossed to take in the blond haired male.
"Why would I have done that if you already ate?"
Lilith turned to Pieck to ignore the bantering men. "How did you get in here?"
"I crawled in through the window." Pieck said, bringing her hand up to whisper behind it, "But it was Zeke's idea in the first place for us to come."
At the mention of the older man, he was beside her now, having returned from where she'd seen him disappear into the kitchen. He placed a cup before her, one of the nice clear ones she kept for company, his glasses glinting when he looked down at Lilith. "Actually it was my idea to stop by and check on you when these three caught wind and followed me here."
"Come on, Zeke. You're already the war chief, at least let us take some credit this time too." Porco drained the remaining contents of his glass before grabbing the liquor bottle to refill his and Lilith's.
"Hm, that's true." Zeke made his way around the table to find his seat. "Though I suppose it worked out better this way in the end."
"I agree." Lilith ignored the way Zeke's gaze lingered on her. "This was definitely a surprise but a good one. Thank you guys for taking the time away from your family to come here."
The sincerity had to have been obvious behind her words because the group seemed to soften at them, lifting their glasses to clink them against Lilith's own.
"Were you guys waiting long for me to come back?"
"Not necessarily." Reiner said from beside her. He took another sip of his drink, relaxing more as the liquor fell down his throat. "We knew it would probably take a while so we planned it accordingly."
"Did everything go well?'" Pieck asked, fingers laced around her own glass.
Despite herself, Lilith didn't- couldn't- meet her face. "I doubt I would be here right now if it hadn't."
A certain silence followed the words, though Porco didn't allow it to last long, shifting in his seat. In front of the fireplace, his hair looked more fiery than usual, closer to Lilith's own shade. "Well," he began, offering her a grin, "not like we had anything to worry about anyway."
"That's right. We know how competent you are." Zeke agreed, though Lilith caught the tone of his voice the other overlooked- the worry lining his words. She didn't allow herself to linger on them.
"Exactly." Lilith urged her lips upward. "Now Reiner, where's that food you mentioned? I haven't had your mother's cooking in ages."
The rest of the night seemed to pass in a blur at that. Lilith had forgotten how fast time flew when enjoying oneself, laughing and basking in stories. The complete opposite of only days ago when they'd been in war, surrounded by carnage and death.
It was times like this that Lilith cherished. That she wished would never end even when the clock struck past midnight and Porco was so tipsy Pieck offered to walk him home with Reiner. Only Zeke remained after, offering to help clean up after the three of them had left and the sound of Porco's incoherent babbling was gone.
Zeke was swift in his actions, helping wipe and put away the leftover glasses and plates after Lilith had washed them. It was a quick job, even though there were more dishes after Lilith had ended up sharing Reiner's food between Porco and Pieck at their lit up expressions.
"You didn't have to stay, you know." Lilith mentioned from her spot leaning against the counter, observing the older male put away the dishes in their rightful places.
Despite being over a year away, Zeke still didn't need to be told where anything went. Lilith herself was faintly surprised none of the others had caught on. Though even if they had no one seemed to mention how accustomed he appeared around her apartment. How he knew where all her utensils were without having to be told along with her plates and cups.
"Why not?" Zeke finished putting the glass away, turning to her with a small smile. For a moment it seemed strange seeing him out of uniform after the past year. The same had gone for the others after seeing them in civilian clothing earlier. It seemed to give color to them compared to the usual white they wore, Zeke's own green pants and grey top giving him a more handsome appeal. "It's been a while since the last time we were able to be on our own and talk."
Lilith could barely keep count of the amount of times Zeke had come over to check on her or keep her company over the past four years. Lilith supposed her apartment had almost become like a home away from home for him, his visits perhaps more for himself than they were for Lilith like he always made it seem. It was why Lilith never denied him. Not after all he'd done for her.
"Maybe I don't want to talk."
"Too tired after today?"
She ignored his words, knowing the truth of what he was insinuating. "I'm fine."
Zeke sighed, coming to stand before her. "I don't believe that."
The kitchen seemed too small then. No way for her to escape with him in front of Lilith blocking her path. "Zeke-"
"How were the tests?"
Lilith tensed at the question, quickly forcing herself to relax. She knew she didn't need to be like such with Zeke, not him of all people, but Lilith couldn't help it. Despite being the only one out of the Warriors who truly knew the extent of what she went through regularly, Lilith didn't want to let on how much it affected her.
Still it did. The amount of needles entering her body, the forceful shifts into her titan, the experiments to see her regeneration were still similar to the other shifters. They all took their toll. Though Zeke didn't need to know that.
His spinal fluid and tissue may have been the main component to help her become a titan shifter, but he didn't need to feel more guilty than he already did. He already blamed himself often, especially in the beginning years after his return from Paradise once he saw the extent the Marley scientists put her through. Experiment after experiment. Being turned into a pure titan and back into a human until finally they got it right.
It had been a breakthrough but Lilith was still in the experimental phases. There were still a large amount of factors that were unknown with her titan and if she were fully the same as other shifters. Though from everything so far it seemed as such and if it continued on, then there would be armies of titan shifters soon enough.
Through it all Zeke had given her all his support. Had come over more times than she could count when he brought her back from despair.
Lilith promised herself she wasn't like that anymore however. She wouldn't run into his arms and cling to him like she had at one point. She was no longer weak, she convinced herself.
"Obviously it went fine like I-"
"But how were they for you?"
Lilith held her tongue. "Horrible." She said simply. "What else is new?"
"Lilith…" Zeke stepped forward, slowly, like approaching a wounded animal. Her teeth grit at the action. "Talk to me. Let me help."
His arms came around her, pulling her to his chest. She barely passed his shoulders, his larger figure engulfing her nearly whole. Lilith closed her eyes.
"There's nothing you can do." Her voice came out in a strangled whisper. "We can just be glad I passed them and move on."
And that was what Lilith would do, leaning her hand on Zeke's chest, ignoring the burning in her eyes and clenching her nails into her palms.
The internment camp's military hospital had always been a sad place. Not only because of the memories Lilith shared there, but simply because of the men and women sent to recover within its walls. All crippled, both mentally and physically, a shell of their former selves.
Lilith eyed the courtyard from her spot by the window, taking in the scenery of the war's most recent victims littered around. Nothing changed, even a year later. There would always be those suffering because of the wars Marley pulled them into, thousands of Eldians paying the price.
"Sad, isn't it?" At the sound of the voice, Lilith turned to the familiar face before her.
Doctor Fischer hadn't changed within the last year, his brown eyes heavy and hair balding just slightly more than Lilith could remember. "These are just a few of the more healthy shipments of soldiers that came in yesterday." He turned to her with a sad smile. "You should see- well I suppose you know how many of them look."
"I do." Lilith turned back to the window. "It was horrible."
Flashes of bodies sped by her vision. Missing limbs and bloody where they laid out on the floor wailing.
A hand on her shoulder pulled her out from the vision. "I'm glad you came, Liilith. I know you just got back yesterday but I knew you'd be by soon enough."
"Of course. I'll come by to help as much as I can while I'm back on leave."
At her words Doctor Fischer smiled.
Lilith couldn't be sure when exactly she had started volunteering at the hospital. It was just something that happened from one day to the next. But for the past few years she'd dedicated her free time to help around with patients who the nurses couldn't all juggle at once. It was a personal task for her, one not many knew she did unless they saw her first hand at the hospital themselves. Even Zeke knew little of it, though it had been mentioned in passing at one time or another.
The staff were often overly fond of her, though Lilith thought that had something to do with the fact that she was a warrior. Still and yet they were all kind to Lilith, assigning her patients throughout the days to help spend company with or to wash and feed them. Small things that at the end of the day helped Lilith herself- made her feel human again despite the beast hiding beneath her skin.
"You're growing into such a fine woman Lilith. A beauty too. Your parents would be proud." The older man patted her head softly.
"I hope so." She sucked in a soft breath to ease her chest. "Is there anything you need me to do right now?"
"You can go outside and tend to some of the patients. Try talking to them or play a game. I know how good you are with them." The doctor paused consideringly. "Though there is one I would like you to talk to specifically. You see that one on the bench? With the wheelchair?"
Her golden eyes followed his line of sight out the window to a brown haired figure sitting on a bench further away. "Him?"
"He's one of the new patients that came yesterday. Lost his eye and leg in the trenches and seems to be suffering from amnesia. On top of that the nurses are having a difficult time getting him to talk." Lilith frowned at the story. "Perhaps you can get him to, even if slightly. It's best that the patients talk to us so we can help them as much as we can."
"That shouldn't be a problem." Lilith offered him a nod. "I'll get right to it."
Doctor Fischer put his hands into his white coat. "Thank you Lilith. Don't work too hard though. You did just get back yesterday."
"I won't, doctor." Lilith offered the older man a wink before strolling away down the hall and out the front to the courtyard.
The sun was bright that day, Lilith's long green skirt swaying around her hips as she made her way outside, waving and greeting nurses and patients along the way. Ahead of her the figure from before became more prominent, a bandaged face covered by brown hair turning to her slightly. She allowed her attention to shift down his physique, catching sight of his missing leg, his pants tied to avoid the fabric swaying around.
When Lilith finally stopped before him, she was struck by the single eye staring back at her. A bright green color that shone so brightly the dark shadows under it contrasted harshly. Hidden behind bandages, his other eye was obscured from sight, though it did nothing to ruin his features. His face was young, though seemingly older with a thin mustache and goatee, brown hair hanging limply around him. Lilith thought he was handsome, would be more so though if he were properly groomed.
"Hello." Lilith softly greeted with a smile. "Do you mind if I join you?"
The male didn't respond, though it didn't bother her much. "I'm Lilith Roth. And you are?"
The man didn't return the smile, didn't so much as pay her much mind. Only allowed his single eye to sweep over her, from her red hair to her new boots and then to the red arm patch around her bicep where his eye stayed fixed on. And then finally met her face, as if truly taking it in and said simply, "Eren Kruger."
A/N: And there you have it!
I have the only feeling Porco would be like Colt when he drinks, though not as bad obviously so I couldn't help but throw that in. But them drinking together would certainly be hilarious.
Also lets talk about how I'm kinda tempted to add some Zeke romance into this but I'm hesitant.
Either way I hope you enjoyed this! First few chapters will start off slow, especially the romance component (This will be a slowburn) but I'm very excited about the direction I'm going with this.
Please like review and follow/favorite!