Hello! Hello from like forever! Okay I'm making no promises to when I will continue posting. I have received soo many requests to finish posting, I mean the story is done. This is just me dealing with FFN being inconsistent AF with its software. Oh and in good news, I finished my Bachelors this summer. I am so happy!

So here we go!

Nina-Present

My head aches when I wake up and it's cold, so cold I can see my breath. The ground beneath me is hard and rumbles, making me shake. Bolting upright, I try to understand where I am. There's large wooden crates and containers. It smells stale and the air is thin. "It's okay," Taka tells me. It's only now that I notice she's sitting next to me with something white and fluffy covering me.

You lied to me. I try to scoot away from her. She looks different now, more like Dr. Rinata, with stripes under golden eyes, fangs and now her pointed ears are apparent. Where am I?

On a plane. He's taking you back to Japan. Her fingers tremble as she signs and the entire time, although she's talking to me, her eyes are in one of the dark corners of the plane.

What does he want?

You made him mad.

It wasn't a lie what I wrote.

Taka shrugs, making me feel nervous. But it was his life.

Who are you? Are you really his daughter?

She nods her head and exhales, pulling me against her chest. I'll tell you everything. My brother found you in Lover's Park when you were five. He called me down from the castle, I'd never been out of it before…he told me to take you away, to somewhere else, where my father couldn't find you. He knew you…Tsukimaru knew Rin—

It's too hard to let her continue. Instead I get up and approach Dr. Rinata. He sits leisurely, leaning against the wall, breathing deeply with a sad look on his face. Take me home.

"Why would I do that?" he scoffs and then pats the ground next to him.

My shoulders start shaking from the cold. Huddling in on myself, I start shivering in earnest, down to chattering teeth.

"Don't blame me if you get sick." Then I see the large fluff hanging off his left shoulder. "You're cold. Sit with me."

Why are you doing this? I'm trying to be brave but I feel a knot forming in my stomach and fear is a bitch. Even though I met him ten years ago, he was never like this. You knew even then didn't you?

"Of course I did," he answers coldly.

You sent me away…

"You expected me to fall in love with a fifteen year old? I'm not that depraved." He rolls his eyes, but then takes my hand and yanks me down. "I said sit," this time he signs too. "You don't understand what you have done."

He wraps the white fur around me and pulls me into his chest. It's an odd feeling, warm and home, which makes me feel so confused. Don't expect me to fall in love with you. I just want to go home.

"You wouldn't know what real love is if it bit a hole through your middle. What you wrote, the lies you told…" he becomes distant, nearly making me feel guilty. But I know what I've remembered. "You have no idea what love is."

And you do? You cheated on her and she was dumb enough to go back to you.

He doesn't answer me.

You went after her again when you said you wouldn't. You brought her back into your home!

He keeps ignoring me.

Aren't you going to say something?

"No, he's going to be stubborn and quiet now." Taka comes closer and sits with us. He tightens his grip on my shoulder and then I feel his nose in my hair.

What are you doing? Stop it! I try to push his face away but he grabs my hands and smells me again.

"Dog demon. Smell is important to us. You smell like her." Taka stares off to the side and then says in a whisper, "I'm sorry." Twiddling her thumbs, she continues, "I didn't want to just put you anywhere. I knew what you meant to my father but I didn't want to hurt my mother either and you were really cute."

Your mother is a home wrecker! My entire life is a lie because of you! And how did you stay with me if…oh no…no no no….Lucy? I reach out and touch the fur around her shoulders with my hands. I would remember that fur anywhere.

Taka shrugs and then flicks tears from her eyes. "It wasn't really my mother's fault. It was but it wasn't…she was young and stupid. She'd tell you that herself if she were here—"

Great the heifer is still alive. Don't think I'll fall in love with you.

"And make me cheat on her?" he laughs morosely. "I will not break my bond to Natsuki."

Does she know about me?

"Yes," he says quietly. "And I told her I sent you away. She doesn't know about the other conversations or that I have visited you."

You are such a liar.

"I am what I have had to be. Something someone who only thinks about themselves wouldn't understand," he bites out. Tilting his head to the side, he tells me, "We're nearing Japan."

I am not selfish.

"Nina," his voice breaks and pulls my chin up. There is something so warm and familiar about his eyes and now I know why. He swallows and pulls my forehead to his, "there is so much you don't know."

I know enough….

"If that were true, you wouldn't have written what you did. And you Taka," he takes his daughter's hands and kisses her knuckles. "Was this your revenge?"

"Do you hate me, Daddy?"

"Never my, little one. You will always be the apple of my eye and the comfort sent to me after her death. Whether this human understands that or not."

He's infuriating. He makes no sense and answers little. How am I supposed to see him differently if he never answers?

He's taking me to a forest off the western coast of Japan. He said it was once his family's lands, centuries before and when he said centuries he tells me that it was around seven hundred years before. His father died in these lands and they were taken over by Kensaku, Natsuki's father, but after everyone died during the illness that wiped the demons from this world, he became something like a demon emperor in Japan. He speaks endlessly about the small battles that were fought, how Natsuki and his sons Tsukimaru and Taiyomaru were in constant danger. I feel my anger flaring at the mention of Natsuki. I slap at his wrist to get his attention. He wouldn't let Taka come. He made her go back to his home in the sky, whatever that means.

"Oh if only you had actually learned to speak," he mocks me and I slap at it again until he stops and turns around.

You're still with her aren't you? Where are you taking me? I sign frantically. I'm used to having my interpreter with me.

"Slowly," he says the word so slowly, as if I can't hear him.

I ask again, signing carefully, making sure he understands what I'm asking.

"Which question do you want answered first?" he says so smugly, I want to hit him.

I can't believe you! The words come like lightening off my fingers. You are such a pig! What do you think is going to happen? That I'm going to be stupid enough to love you like she did?

He rolls his eyes and continues leading me through the forest, completely ignoring me. I hate him even more now.

I slap his shoulder and then wince, because I feel like I just hit a rock.

"Has anyone ever told you, hitting a Japanese youkai is a bad idea." He chuckles as we move through the forest and the leaves and I almost trip on my own two feet.

"You made a choice Nina, to make a public mockery of my life, to make me look like a monster."

You are a monster! I sign so languidly, I know he sees it.

"No…you cannot understand!" He turns on me, eyes red around the edges.

I cringe at the pitch at his voice, wanting to shrink back, because I can see the flames of his yoki coming off his shoulders. You cheated on her, you chose someone else over her!

"You are an entitled brat! Let me guess you watched Cinderella and thought that Prince Charming would pick you up and there would be no problems? That every relationship is perfect and no one ever fights? No, I know, you judge me by your pathetic human standards, not understanding what I am." He pulls me in front of a tree and I nearly lose my shit when a face pokes through the trunk. It's old and wrinkled and has bulbous eyes that make me want to run.

Oh my god… I try to back away, only to feel Sesshomaru's hands on my shoulders stopping me.

"Oh my god…" the tree echoes my shock and limbs wrap around my face, tilting it to the left, to the right and up and then down. "Rin…well not Rin but my goodness. I wasn't sure you would find her Sesshomaru."

For whatever reason that makes Sesshomaru laugh and it's a deep, throaty sound, like a baritone. "Did I know about her before the great Bukoseno?"

The tree sputters, releasing my head. "No," he glares at Sesshomaru and I start laughing too. "Why have you come?"

He made me. I stupidly sign to the face and then wonder if he can actually understand me.

"You forced my hand. I did not ask you to publicly humiliate me." Sesshomaru's voice sounds like a dog barking.

I didn't ask to be the incarnation of your dead lover! Is it my fault I don't worship the ground you walk on so stupidly like she did? You were a terrible mate.

"Lover."

Whatever. I dismiss him. I had to do something with the memories. Did you think I wanted to do nothing but dream of you? Live your life, your pain, the miscarriage, the lost memories, the nightmares.

He covers my hands, cupping them in his, then brings them up to his lips, and I swear my heart skips a beat. It's one thing to dream about his mouth on my body, another one completely to actually feel them. I shake my head, because I don't want him to do it again, but he smirks and raises an eyebrow, kissing the back of my left hand. "You do not understand…not the time that we lived in, or who she was. Do not," his voice breaks, he chokes and looks away before he swallows the first sign of emotion I've seen on him, "Leave Sakura out of this. My baby, my daughter, the one I…" and then he stops completely and turns back to the tree. "Bukoseno," he raises my hand and presses it against the tree. "Is there enough of her left inside of you to speak to Nina?"

I want to ask how the tree is speaking English but then his vines stab through Sesshomaru's chest, blood drips through his grey sweater as he falls to his knees. I try to catch him but he stops me as the same branches, rise, dripping in his blood to twine around my shoulders and then it burns and I fall against a splattered, warm chest and the world turns white.

Please review as always! OOO what's about to happen?

Okay up Next Rin-Present that should give everyone a clue as to what is about to happen.

Review Responses:

Diaza: Yeah so go read something else. If I haven't made myself abundantly clear yet, I do not write the typical sessrin. I'm on 3 block lists. Like at this point if that doesn't tell you I don't treat SessRin the way everyone else normally does I don't know what to tell you. There are 800 stories on Ao3, there are 5,400 on FFN, there's 51 on Wattpad. Read something else. I write all Drama all the time.

Vilbern: Oh the angst! My favorite thing to write. Which reminds me, aren't you writing something gifted to me on AO3? How do I go about getting an update? Unless it did update? I haven't figure out how to get alerts for AO3 yet. Hope you are well.

liz80: OOO Now you see where he's going and why! I'm excited, I really need to finish posting this.

Luin-Fanel: Aww thanks for missing me. I know I was so consistent before. The Pandemic really did a number on my ability to post. I agree with not liking how Yashahime is portraying Rin. Even though they now said she's 18 and she held Sess's sword to her neck, I still don't like it. We never see her outside him, which is important to me that she stands on her own. And also like okay kill her, but why not go to Kagome? Rin was friends with the inugang. I'm not watching this season because I have these stories and others.

Mechine: So many questions! I think Taka is just mad at both parents. I don't think from the start she ever liked being cooped up like a porcelain doll. She didn't get to be someone because everyone took her choices from her. You shall see soon what happened.

Missbbadass: First off I love your username. It's wonderful. Second off you're welcome! I hope you liked this one too.

RYHT: Hello! I know your reviews are from earlier chapters but just so you know i saw them and thank you!

Alubaco: Welcome to the madness. Yuki makes everyone Mad. I swear she does it on purpose. I agree that perhaps we've gotten too used to the typical sessrin stories and this fandom isn't a big angsty fandom. I've been exploring others and angst seems more acceptable in other fandoms. Which is fine, Sesshomaru has always been morally ambiguous. I definitely did not and still do not like Yashahime. I may do a rewrite at some point but at the moment whenever I think of it, I think of my first two installments and I already wrote big bad villain hates hanyou...So I don't know.

Guest: I know right? So close what is wrong with me? Finish posting! Don't worry not forgotten. I'm just eaten alive by real life.

Help: Yes I will keep updating. I really only have a few chapters left to post. Hopefully I will find the time. I'm taking a momentary break working on originals to give my fanfics some love.

Anonymous: I've considered turning this series into a high flying fantasy/romance but I don't know. Maybe at one point I might. We shall see. I have so many original ideas. I have checked on season two of Yashahime and it's still just not for me. I need more depth to my characters. I need it established firmly that Sesshomaru cannot beat Zero or Kirnmaru on his own. I would have liked to see Rin suggest taking her to Kagome. And I also need Rin to stand on her own, separate from Sesshomaru as a character. So I'm glad they're trying to fix all the issues with Season 1 in S2 but it's still just not for me.