A/N: Officially, the next chapter is going to be the last one before my hiatus. Here's hoping it doesn't take too long. We're reaching the end of this arc and all of our shenanigans. I hope you guys had fun with this one, I certainly did :). I must be a sadist or something. Also, I chopped off all my hair (for reference, my hair was about chest length/slightly lower, and now it's above my ears). Anywho, fingers crossed for everybody in this story. They all got a target on their back at this point lol.
Thanks to Toony Kumokori, LuckyGamer, and popmordiscos1 for following and/or adding this story as a favorite!
Reviews
Hissing Mist- Oh damn, a very long review haha. Thanks :). Ah yes, the Umbra, Whiteshadow, and raindrop fight is easily in the top ten that I've written. It does kinda suck Umbra had to die, but alas, that's just how things are sometimes. Best Royal Apprentice Gang, that's quite the title for them. I'd say they deserve it. I'm not nice to my main characters, in case you haven't noticed XD. Prepare for the incoming guilt train from her. I'll take the passive-aggressive blame lol. I put her through hell. I'm so sorry Flarekitty, I love you I swear. For the drowning thing before her and Sootboi, that had more to do with Sootboi's side of it. He felt like he was drowning- and now it's Flarekitty's turn. Both literally and metaphorically, hooray! Did I mention a truck? If I did, whoops. It was probably a metaphor. Scarlet probably could've figured out everything. If she, you know… wasn't killed. Lol. Well, somebody hurt Sagepaw, you'll find out soon. Favorite snake XD. That's Cherrypaw's name now. Cherry is a pleasure to write for, as always. I just want everybody to be friends, imagine the chaos if they all got along. Cherry can't stop flirting to save her life and she got that from Jinx. Hypothetical kits between them would have pretty eyes. Honestly, side note, Flarekitty's eyes are probably my favorite. I just love silver. Oh, Cherrypaw is definitely not straight. Pan is probably what she'd identify with the most. She's also just really damn beautiful and knows how to use it effectively. Cherrysnake is fitting. (And yes, no one can measure up to Jinx.) I really miss her too. The next arc will most likely be a Forestclan arc. There's a lot of shenanigans there I need to address. Ooh, imagine a world where Cherry went with Ixora back then. That would have changed so much of this story. (For one, Berry would end up the Grand Royal instead of a Cripple.) Flarekitty is loyal to Sootboi, she can just admit Cherry is really pretty too. And Cherry can do the same. Appleshade was Cherrypaw's mother, yes. Just think of like, Cherrypaw- but turn it up to twenty on the scale. So many mind games in Forestclan. That should be fun to deal with when we go back there. Dusty Moth lol. Cherry just needs to get her confidence back, and Mothpaw's gonna have a run for his money. She actually doesn't really care about Darkpaw, but Berrypaw is a different matter and that part inside of her does care about Berry. Honestly, that little scene between them with Cherrpaw's act falling apart was my favorite part of the whole chapter. Oh definitely, Cherrypaw can wear a mask better than Flarepaw. (I don't know if that's something to be proud of.) I've long since wanted to hug Cherrypaw ever since I figured out her backstory. I wouldn't say Cherry's given up, but as Flare said, she is tired. She needs a break. They all do at this point lol. Just blame me for all their problems, it's all good XD. The running for GR definitely changes someone. Most often for the worse. To be completely honest, I usually come up with summaries before titles. But for this one, Embers and Ashes came from the main characters and vice versa. Flarepaw was originally supposed to be called Emberpaw, and Sootpaw was originally supposed to be called Ashpaw (They also looked different in my head). But I swapped them out and I think that's for the best. The title is supposed to reflect the MC's, but also the last line of the summary where everything may fall to embers and ashes. Oh snap, talk about a callback to the beginning. Shout out to the yellow butterfly. You're the real hero of this story XD. I have re-read parts of the story, but it has been a while since I read it from the very beginning. I might have to do that soon, just to get a better idea of where I want the story to go. It usually helps. (So, it looks like I'll be re-reading all of this soon. What fun.) That's actually kinda funny if Wildfire really thought that, and when he saw her he's just all like "ah crap, you're not supposed to be here" XD. A very long review indeed haha. Thanks for taking the time to do it. Funny enough, for a lot of the side characters, I never intend for them to be anything important. Sagesplash, for example, wasn't supposed to even be mentioned and whatnot. But Windy just had to go and have a sad backstory and he pushed his way to the front and I'm like cool. I guess we're doing this. But yeah, he doesn't deserve that prefix. Windy's backstory will always remain one of my favorites simply because I didn't plan for her to have a backstory and I made up most of it on the spot. Aggressively blaming me XD. Time to put on my helmet for safety. I mentioned the Valley enough times and sprinkled tidbits of it throughout the story for a reason. It does play a role in this. We might even get to see Ixora again, who knows? Cherry would probably go feral if she saw Ixora again. And the entire time she'd be trying to kill her, Ixora would probably be flirting with her cause that's just how she is XD. Well, thanks for the long review haha. It's always a lot of fun seeing someone go through the entire thing.
WhiteWinter1- It was a good one, I quite enjoyed it too. No matter how painful it was. If there's one thing you should know about me and my stories, and I can always go heavier on the angst. Tears are aplenty, don't worry lol. The grand show-off between the two will come soon enough, actually. Their final trial is coming up very quickly and I can't wait for it. Look forward to it :).
Aemilius the second- That's a nice one. Kinda funny. Man, we've come a long way huh?
Guest- Hey, if you're gonna be reviewing frequently, do you want me to use carolinaauthor/Rose instead of Guest? I can do that if you want. Anywho. I'm glad you liked it :). This arc was pretty painful, but I really enjoyed it. I kinda like the relationship between Cherry and Flare. Here's hoping they don't revert back so quickly and vehemently to hating each other. Everyone needs a hug, group hug everybody! Cloudstar and Wildfire can be excluded. We're nearing the end of the arc, so I hope you enjoy the rest of it :). Second Review: More than one review is always nice lol. I actually wasn't very good with fight scenes going into this story, but I knew I had to get better at it since a whole lot of the story revolves around battles and whatnot. I do feel a lot more confident with them now and I'm glad you love them :). I will gladly take the chocolate, thanks. I wouldn't mind reading your story, but it may take a while for me to get back to you on that because… haha, I'm actually very busy. I'm not only writing this story and working on the outline, I also actively write and work on RWBY fanfiction on ao3 (and… my chapters for those are long. You thought these were long? Yeah, no.) and on top of that, I'm also writing an original story as well that I wish to publish when I'm done with it. I'm a bit of a perfectionist with it, so I'm constantly editing and reading my own stuff to fix it up. But I wouldn't mind reading yours to get a bit of a break! I could definitely use it. (You might need to find a different way to tell me how to search for it, because for some reason FFN doesn't allow links and whatnot so all I see is '.com' written down haha. I do have my email on my profile you can send it to me there if you'd like.) Okay, I've been warned from the main series lol. I've always been curious about it, but meh. I don't really have the time to seek out each book, and last I heard, there were quite a bit.
Songmistle (Guest)- Well, it ain't entirely safe for raindrop to be here XD. Do you want her to die or become a prisoner? Besides, even if they leave, who's to say that's gonna stop me from messing with them? They can't escape from me that easily lol. We are almost done with this arc though, so we will be saying goodbye to Stormclan for a little bit as we jump somewhere else. Nothing wrong with liking calm moments. They're really necessary. I sense it, don't worry haha. Hope you had fun. Thanks for the questions, I'll probably make a note of them.
LuckyGamer- All of the chapters! Lol. Honestly, I don't entirely know. As I've said, the outline isn't completely fleshed out (I'm going to be doing that really soon though), so the line-up I have might change and some things might be taken out and some things might be added. BUT if we are going based on what I have noted down, I'd predict about 60ish chapters? 61, technically, including an epilogue. That's not including any backstory chapters I will probably write in the future, though. So yeah. A lot more. Hope you're in it for the long run, and if not, I hope you enjoyed it anyway :).
KyubiMaster9- Pack your bags, gang, we're leaving! XD. We'll see what they decide soon enough, never fear. Ah yes, the hashtags. #SagepawSurvives everybody. This story does have a lot of fight scenes, huh? There's still so many more left too, never fear. Ah yes, that was a good one. I enjoyed letting her beat him up for a bit lol. Oh, Willowflame is livid looking down on everything, trying to find a way to come back to life just to beat him up haha. If that's something you guys really want, I wouldn't mind making a chapter detailing the full history/systems of the clans. I might do a final Q&A as well, we'll see. Sadly, no. There haven't been any Nobles who have made it to the rank of Grand Royal- but only recently have Nobles even been allowed into the running. (I'd say three generations ago.) And actually; all three, Blazestar, Foreststar, and Stormstar do have descendants. The rule that GR's aren't allowed kits came after them, so they did actually have kits of their own. This is why Wildfire (and Flarekitty, Sagepaw, and Flamepaw) are said to be related to all the past Grand Royals. It's their legacy. They're not only related to the previous Grand Royal, Lionstar, but they are in fact related to every Grand Royal of Blazeclan- including Blazestar… But, as Mousepaw mentioned before, this lineage got ruined with Wildfire's line, since Redstar was chosen instead of him. And now it all depends on Flarepaw, if she chooses to restart that tradition and become Grand Royal, or if she follows her mother's legacy instead. (But aside from Blazeclan, yes. There are descendants of the other original Grand Royals.) Great question!
Rainbow Badge (Guest)- They really have come so far. I'm so proud :). Family road trip lol. Crimsonpaw is meant to be the outgoing one, yes. (Also, the email that I had all those notes of the fan-submitted characters was deleted, so now I have to go through all the reviews again to find them. How fun.) That sounds like a wonderful idea lol. In an alternate universe, that could have been a reality if I wasn't so mean. Leafstar and Willowflame could have been the best moms and Whiteshadow would have been the best dad. That would have changed their lives completely for the better. I like Wildfire too just because of his capabilities and significance in Flarepaw's life. (Sometimes the worst villains are your own family, you know?) Sleekwhisker is a cool name. Nightstone is a good one too because of his counter to Sootblaze. I'm happy you like the antagonists of this story. (Most of them, Sagesplash has got to go.) I would never just kill Wildfire like that. If he's gonna go down, he's gonna go down fighting. So many questions, hopefully you'll find out about them in the next Forestclan arc. Again, in an alternate universe; those romances could have happened lol. I'd say Sootblaze doesn't have romantic chemistry with anyone else because before Flarekitty, he never really cared for romance. He was always just the protector/big brother to everyone. A perfect case of the jock and the nerd XD. Incredibly intimidating sword lady lol. Mothpaw is blackmailing her because he basically knows all of her secrets and the things she hides from the rest of the clan (or flings with Jinx, saving a rogue and hiding them on clan territory, being half-clan, etc). Midlife crisis at twenty XD. I mean, accurate. Ripplewave of all Med Cats needs a pay raise. Cloudstar would definitely get in trouble for that. Your love for Drippingpaw makes me laugh, I didn't expect someone to fall in love with her so much. That would be interesting though. Shadepaw's a good bro, I should include him more. Flarepaw v Gingerpaw is also a good one. It was meant to be low stakes, but Cloudstar is a petty boy. Some of the Royals carried him back lol, he was okay. He doesn't have a permanent head injury, just a bunch of shame. I wish I had the iconic confidence of Emberpaw. Oh dear, the chaos she could've caused. Amazing. Alternate universe. Hope you continue to enjoy it!
Thanks to everybody who reviewed, followed, and/or added this story as a favorite!
Let's get started!
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Stormclan
…
"Come with me then."
Those were not words Windpaw had been expecting. She was so used to Rainpaw leaving without any semblance of a goodbye, she just expected this to be the same way. They would have to return to camp and her love would simply walk off in the opposite direction, never to return. Never to see her again.
Because she wasn't anticipating them, the words threw her for a loop. She recoiled in bewilderment and out of the corner of her eye, she could see Bluepaw doing the same. Their eyes were drawn together, copper and dark green, and there was equal surprise shared between them.
Honestly, she didn't even know why they hadn't thought of that possibility.
But to just… Run away from it all…
Rainpaw grew nervous then, perhaps even registering the words she just said as well, and she cleared her throat and scrambled back a step, shaking her head. She expected the words I'm joking to come from her, but Windpaw knew better.
This was not something Rainpaw would take lightly.
"I…" Rainpaw mumbled, taking a second to gather her thoughts before she took in a deep breath and faced the two of them. Windpaw couldn't quite help the small spark of pride that warmed in her chest. The blue-furred she-cat was not backing down despite how undoubtedly nervous she was. "I mean it. Come with me."
Her gaze drifted between the both of them, not lingering on any of them for longer than the other, "Both of you."
"Rainpaw, we can't just…" Bluepaw began before trailing off, his brow furrowing in thought. Windpaw understood.
We can't just leave?
Of course, we can.
What was stopping them anyway? Loyalty to the clan? Hilarious. Sure, the Windpaw of a few moons ago might have wanted to stick around to gain Sagesplash's favor, to get on his good side, to become something he could be proud of- but things changed. She was no longer the young kit wanting attention and love from a father who didn't know how to give it to anyone. She no longer cared for his approval on any matter of her life.
As for Fernclaw… Well, her mother had yet to approach her again, working on herself as she claimed. Windpaw could see it from afar though, the progress she was steadily making. Sure, she was becoming more isolated from those she was only friends with because of Sagesplash, but now, Fernclaw was realizing who was really there for her. If anything, she wasn't losing anybody, only gaining a peace of mind and realness from her world of fakeness.
But still, whatever progress her mother had made was not enough for them to start stemming their relationship together again. It was safe to say Windpaw didn't care for her approval either.
As for the rest of the clan…
She didn't care.
The title of Grand Royal only seemed like an empty promise. It would ruin everything that she had now regardless, and without wanting to gain it for her parents rather than herself, there was no real reason for her to continue trying to reach it anymore. (Stars, her father would be so disappointed in her… It made her almost want to stick around just to fail on purpose to rub it in his face that he didn't control her.)
So, what was stopping her from running off with what was undeniably the most important part of her life?
Fear…
Her eyes drifted off to the side, into the forest, past the forest now. To the distant horizon, to the unknown world.
Life in the clan gave her security. She knew her place here, she knew what role she played. She knew where to hunt and how to hunt the things here and where the best places to be were.
But out there? In a place that had no rules other than the rule of survival?
Windpaw had never left Stormclan territory before. She had played with the idea many times, sure, especially when Rainpaw had been taken as a kit. That she would just up and leave to look for her.
And now, faced with the opportunity, it made her want to laugh because it was ridiculous she was this cautious. (Would she have faced the same fear long ago? Or would the bravery of recklessness and ambition bring her enough courage to trek into the world with no rules?)
Stormclan territory was all she has known her entire life, has watched it change as the seasons came and went, has explored it over and over and over again.
But into the wild world?
She didn't realize how comfortable she felt with the rules and structure of clan life until now- given the chance to enter a realm where all of that was gone.
After all, Rainpaw had entered that world and returned forever changed in some irreversible way. That world had torn her apart from the inside out and what she was now was merely a cruel amalgamation of who she once was. She did what she had to do to survive- and it hurt her. It broke her. She's alive now, sure, but she's different.
Would the world do the same to Windpaw?
Would it rip her apart too and stitch her back together haphazardly? Would she change in some irreversible way?
Apparently, the two of them had been quiet for so long. Rainpaw let out a sigh, a quiet, sad chuckle.
"I know, I know," she mumbled. "It's a lot to take in. A-And I don't want to make it seem like I'm asking you to choose between me and becoming a Grand Royal… I know how important it is to the both of you. I just… I've never been given the chance to ask before, so I'm asking now. You don't have to say yes- and you don't have to worry about me either. I'll be fine."
"Will you?" It slipped from her tongue before she could try to stop it and Rainpaw met her gaze evenly, a smile on her lips. (Sad, always sad. What was it going to take to make her happy again?)
"I guess we'll find out," Rainpaw shrugged casually and it sent a spark of what could only be irritation or indignation down her spine. For things like this, for matters like this to be taken so nonchalantly.
It should only be treated with the utmost importance.
(Perhaps it was a defense mechanism. Perhaps it was just an act. Just a mask.)
"It is a lot to take in," Bluepaw spoke up this time, his ears flat against his head, brows forever furrowed in deep thought. There were so many emotions flashing across his face it nearly gave Windpaw a headache trying to discern them all. Confliction and concern and fear and sorrow and, and, and… "I don't know… This is our home, Rainpaw, we can't just abandon it. It would be damning everybody after us with someone like Cloudstar or- stars forbid, Cloverpaw be chosen after us."
That's right.
If both of them just left like that, someone would need to take over the role of Grand Royal apprentice.
With Specklepaw dead, it would automatically be given to Cloverpaw as the next best candidate. She was the only Royal apprentice that had enough training for it, and Drippingpaw was too young and-
Drippingpaw.
Windpaw grimaced to herself. As much as she hated to admit, she was not without any ties here entirely. She could care less about her parents and the rest of the clan, but her half-sister… She would be abandoning her.
And Bluepaw was right. Stars forbid that she leaves her sister in a clan run by Cloudstar and Cloverpaw. She wouldn't stand a chance at surviving. Windpaw could picture it now; Cloverpaw taking over- and because she was so hellbent on gaining vengeance for her dead best friend, there would be battle after battle after battle against Blazeclan.
Revenge was an all-consuming fire, and should one continue to feed it, it would eventually grow too big to contain.
Cloverpaw would be turned to ash by it, and the rest of Stormclan would follow with her.
And if Windpaw knew Cloverpaw like she thought she did, the other she-cat wouldn't care whatsoever. She would lead Stormclan to its doom without remorse.
Some part of her didn't want Drippingpaw to be caught in the crossfire of all of that.
Damn you, she sighed, Damn you for making me care about you after all.
It's not as though she tried very hard to deny it. She was too occupied with everything going on to truly put up her defenses against Drippingpaw wiggling her way into her heart. And now that she was aware of it, Windpaw didn't have the will to try and pry her out.
Except to remove herself entirely from the equation…
Come with me then.
To stay out of fear and loyalty, or to go out of love and devotion. Which side was stronger?
Fear and love were two sides of the same river, divided really only by a stream of labels and predicaments.
"I understand," Rainpaw muttered and a part of her was disappointed and sad that her love seemed to have been expecting that. Expecting them not to take her offer. She took in a deep breath, keeping herself contained by some force of will. "Like I said, I just wanted to give you the option. We've never had it before, so… I don't know. I wanted this to be different."
Different from the last few times. Being taken and being ordered.
This was Rainpaw's choice now. (Granted, even that was probably a stretch. It was either leave or face Cloudstar's wrath.)
"We have to think about it," Bluepaw murmured and Windpaw huffed in frustration.
"There's no time." If only the world could pause long enough for them to think and weigh the options. Stay or leave, stay or leave, stay or leave. She didn't know what to do.
"Whatever the case, I think you should decide quickly."
The three of them froze. That was a new voice. Familiar as well, Windpaw turning off to the side to find-
"Drippingpaw?" She blinked before her lips pulled in a scowl, standing up and taking a step in her direction. "You've been listening this whole time?"
Damn it. If her sister reported this back to camp, then Cloudstar would send everyone after them. To stop Rainpaw before she could escape from his clutches.
"I didn't mean to!" Drippingpaw took a step back to counter her approach, cowering a bit to show she wasn't a threat. Her tail lashed nervously and her shoulders drew up defensively. "You all are just really loud…"
"That doesn't give you the right to- Oh you know, whatever," Windpaw grunted, nervousness beginning to choke her. "Go back to camp and don't tell anyone what you heard… Please."
"I won't," Drippingpaw eased quickly, glancing off in a general direction before taking the risk of approaching. Windpaw allowed her, making sure to stay between her and Rainpaw. Her sister came closer, muttering in a quieter voice. "I came to warn you. Cloudstar is… very mad, and he's looking for you all. He's gonna start sending a patrol out. So, if you're going to leave, you have to leave now before they start searching."
"Damn it," Bluepaw growled beneath his breath, taking that as a cue to stand up as well. Rainpaw took a second to tilt her head back, closing her eyes and just… breathing. Taking in the last remnants of her home- because while Bluepaw and Windpaw were indecisive, she didn't have any other options but to leave. Either way, with or without them, Rainpaw was leaving now. "What I would give to have more time… We'll think about it on the way to the border, we can take you there safely, Rainpaw."
For a second, it almost looked like Rainpaw wanted to argue, opening her mouth before deciding against it and simply nodding. She pushed herself to her paws, a subtle wince to her features, a tightening of her jaw. The motes of pain made Windpaw want to find a way to stop time altogether.
For Rainpaw to leave was already painful.
But for her to leave while injured and fresh out of battle was a whole different kind of torture.
Regardless, they didn't have time to fret. Bluepaw gave a small nod to Drippingpaw as they wandered by, Rainpaw following close at his side to no doubt talk things through with him. Windpaw sighed, meeting the dark blue gaze of her sister and merely tipping her head aside as she began walking off, an indicator to follow.
To her surprise- and hidden delight she would never admit out loud- Drippingpaw followed beside her, ears perked and alert. Helping them.
Her sister was too good for this world. She didn't understand everything going on with them, but she could sense something was wrong and knew that Cloudstar was not the one to trust here.
Bluepaw and Rainpaw talked amongst themselves, so to give them some semblance of privacy, Windpaw focused her attention on her sister. Side-eyeing her, she could see freshly covered slashes of claws, a bite-mark or two. They didn't look all too crippling, the one at her shoulder making her limp a bit. She let out a small puff of air.
"It was pretty reckless of you to try and fight her," Windpaw surprised herself by being the first to speak. If Drippingpaw was as surprised, she didn't outwardly show it, merely letting out a snort and rolling her eyes.
"How was I supposed to know who she was?" The calico grumbled, a hint of a pout to her face. "I haven't been to a Gathering- and the only Grand Royal apprentice I've trained against was you and Bluepaw. No one told me who to look out for, I didn't expect her fighting style to be so…"
Frustration splashed across her face and Drippingpaw looked like she wanted to growl.
"Annoying?" Windpaw supplied with a chuckle.
"Yes!" Her sister exclaimed, grumbling. "I mean, who just dodges everything? She was so fast- even in the river. I thought that would at least slow her down."
"That's Flarepaw for you," she couldn't help but chuckle, something like guilt beginning to stir in her stomach. It made her uncomfortable, her fur prickling against it, but she shook it off.
Did Flarepaw make it back to camp to be treated? Or was she somewhere in her territory, bleeding out? No. They didn't do too much damage in regards to that, Rainpaw's preferred method had been attempting to drown her.
Why do I even care? She shouldn't. Flarepaw was fine.
It would probably take more than them to try and kill her.
"Word of advice; avoid that one if you ever run into her," Windpaw brushed aside, and the more she openly talked to her sister, the more it just felt like they were taking a casual stroll. They weren't taking Rainpaw to the edge of the territory for her to leave. They weren't trying to escape Cloudstar's unhinged anger. They were just… here. "At the very least, don't grow frustrated when you can't hit her. When you get frustrated, you get reckless, and strikes made with abandon are the easiest for her to dodge."
"Have you fought her a lot?"
"Now and then. Four times… Five times? I forget," she shrugged, wincing when that action made her own forgotten wounds fester. Right. It wasn't just Rainpaw who was injured. Flarepaw had done a real number on her and Bluepaw- but they had been too much for her in return. "I hate to admit it, but she's pretty good."
"Better than you?" Drippingpaw drawled, a hint of a tease in her voice.
Windpaw scoffed, "No one's better than me."
"Is that why you're so hurt?" Her sister pointedly looked up and down her body, whiskers twitching. "She even got your face!"
Up ahead, Rainpaw's ears flicked, flattening as she sent a glance to them over her shoulder, her pace speeding up.
"That wasn't…" Windpaw began before shaking her head, swallowing lightly. "Nevermind. Just… don't attempt to fight someone stronger than you. I might not be there to save you."
"Oh, so you do care about me?" Drippingpaw let out another chuckle, but this one felt… emptier. Resigned.
Windpaw instinctively wanted to say I don't and continue to play it off. Continue to pretend that Drippingpaw wasn't doing a better job at getting close to her as she expected. Continue to feebly attempt to push her away without any real reason.
But instead, she found herself saying, "You're my sister. And you know our family, so I don't have to explain why it's so hard for me to show it… but I do care about you, minnow."
"Huh," Drippingpaw hummed in observation. Quiet for a few beats, her eyes remaining on the two ahead of them. Rainpaw and Bluepaw had steadily gravitated closer together, both of them leaning against each other. For support, or perhaps for comfort- she couldn't quite tell. Windpaw wondered if she could ever have something like that with the she-cat beside her… but she knew she wouldn't be able to if she left now. The calico muttered after a moment, "But you care about her more."
"Why must you try to make it into a competition?" Windpaw couldn't help but roll her eyes. "Is it not enough knowing I love you?"
"It is," Drippingpaw said with a hint of a smile in her voice. "That's not the point I was trying to make."
"Then what was?"
"I'm saying, you love her. Right?"
"I thought it was obvious."
"It is. The rest of the clan doesn't like it."
"I hardly care about what the rest of the clan thinks, in case you haven't picked up on that."
"I've picked up on that too," her sister giggled before shaking herself out, focusing. Another beat of silence, before- "You should do it."
"Huh?" Windpaw turned her head in her direction. Drippingpaw met her gaze with a brilliant smile.
"You should go," she gave a one-shoulder shrug. "I saw what you were like without her the last time she was gone, and you were just so… Dull. She makes your world colorful, and she's giving you the choice to go with her… What's stopping you? I thought someone like you would jump at the chance."
"I…" Windpaw gaped for a moment, making sure to keep her voice down so it was just the two of them. "I would've thought you would convince me to stay for you. What about your efforts to not make me hate you?"
"You just admitted to caring about me. I think I already won."
"I can care about you and hate you at the same time," Windpaw jerked her chin, indicating to the tom up ahead. "I do it with Bluepaw."
"I heard that," Bluepaw muttered and she couldn't help but snicker.
"Keep your ear out of my conversation if you know what's good for you."
"I'd try, but you're obnoxiously loud."
"Only for you, Bluepaw," she winked even though he wasn't looking in her direction. He probably sensed it though, if the annoyed grunt was any indication.
"I want you to be happy," Drippingpaw cut in, bringing her attention back to her. There was a shade of somberness on her face, a hurtful color. But honest. "That's all I really want. You're my sister; and above all else, I want my sister to be happy… even if it's not here with me. You're miserable here without her. I'll be missing out on getting to know you more, but… I think I'll be okay with that."
"Would you actually?"
"I already know a lot about you. The good and the bad," her sister beamed, taking a step to bump into her side lightly. "I like what I know. It's enough for me. So, I don't know if I was one of the reasons that made you hesitate, but if I was, I just want to say that you don't have to worry about me."
"One of the reasons," Windpaw admitted with a sigh, her eyes trailing around. They were getting closer. The trees were beginning to thin out, the terrain beginning to alter. Soon enough, over the next bend, they would be right at the edge. Off in the direction Rainpaw was taken the first time- toward the mountains in the far, far, far distance. Beneath her breath, she confessed, "I'm also scared."
"You?" Drippingpaw widened her eyes. "You're not scared of anything."
"I'm scared of a lot," she chuckled, melancholic. "I just know how to hide it. To survive here, you need to learn to put on a mask and hide everything away."
"That's stupid."
"Such wise words from you, huh?"
"I mean," Drippingpaw shook her head, backtracking. "If you hide everything all the time, how will everyone know the real you? How can they like the real you if you don't even show it?"
Hmm. Windpaw didn't offer a response. It was a simple way of thinking.
She had shown the real her and was punished for it. The real her was unwanted; by her parents, by her mentors, by the rest of her clanmates. The only one who accepted her had been Rainkit and then she was taken and ruined- so maybe it was Windpaw's fault in a way. So, trying to fit in had been her go-to, and when that inevitably didn't work, she created another part of her that would push everyone away first before they could do the same. Another mask.
Honestly, she didn't even know who was truly behind it all.
How could she show the real her if she didn't even know who the real her was?
"I don't think you should be scared," Drippingpaw picked up when it became obvious she wasn't going to answer anymore. Her sister gave her a comforting smile, "Because you'll have her, won't you?"
She's right. Copper drifted over to Rainpaw. As long as they had each other, there was nothing to fear. She would have Rainpaw's back and Rainpaw would have hers.
The world could throw whatever it wanted at them and they would face it together.
Can I really just… leave?
Leave everything behind… My home, my legacy, my family, my rank.
All it took was a single step.
But as with everything, that first step was always the hardest.
At last, they arrived at the clan's border. The open world stretched far and wide, the far distant mountains only a mere speck on the horizon that Windpaw had to squint to see. The four of them spread out along the treeline to the endless plains. A majority of the snow had melted already- no trees to block out the sunlight there- and if she wasn't just seeing things, she swore the grass was the greenest she had ever seen before. It looked rather strange to her.
A world without trees, without rivers, without dense vegetation.
It was terrifying and mesmerizing to look at.
They all held their breaths, Drippingpaw stepping back to give them some time and privacy, staring off into the distance with a curious expression. There was a small smile on her face, and her eyes closed as she breathed in the incoming air. Windpaw wished she could be as relaxed.
The first step was always the hardest… but Rainpaw merely let out a small breath before taking it. She stepped past the treeline, officially crossing the border, before pausing and turning to face the two of them. She gave a tight smile, a shine of tears in her eyes.
"Rainpaw," Bluepaw muttered, his voice cracking before he cleared it, ears drooping and shoulders slouching. "There's… There's a lot I have to do here. I can't just… leave on good conscience knowing the rest of Stormclan will be stuck with tyrants. I love you, and I don't want to say goodbye to you… but I have to stay. I-If I stay, I can make Stormclan better so that, maybe one day, you can come back. You can be home."
"Stormclan has never been my home," Rainpaw responded, her voice tight with held-in tears. "It was just you two… but I know you, Bluepaw. You love the clan as much as you love me… You love the territory because… it's where mom grew up. So, I get it. You can't just leave."
"I'm sorry," Bluepaw sniffled, breath shuddering as he exhaled. "I'm sorry, I want to-"
"I know," Rainpaw took a step forward, half on Stormclan territory and half in the free world. She brushed her muzzle against his, nuzzling closer as she embraced him tightly. "I know. You don't have to apologize. You want to make Stormclan a better place and I know nothing is going to stop you. It's okay, I love you. It's okay."
So, that was what he decided. Bluepaw was going to stay. To face Cloudstar head-on and make Stormclan a place where they didn't always have to let extreme vengeance get to their heads. It could be a peaceful place. He was tired of fighting, and hopefully- if this recent battle was anything to go on- a majority of the clan would be as well. They would realize their mistakes and grow cognizant of just who they were taking orders from.
If all went well, Bluepaw would be able to become the next Grand Royal without Cloudstar trying to stop it.
After all, a Grand Royal's power was only as strong as the number of clanmates backing them up.
She had little doubt Cloudstar would lose support as a leader because of this fight- Bluepaw just needed to step up and continue that momentum.
But could he do it alone?
Stay or leave. What should I do?
Rainpaw took a step away, brother and sister staring at each other for a moment longer before Bluepaw nodded and she stepped away from him.
Finally, her love turned to her, and Windpaw was faced with the question yet again. Her entire life, their entire lives flashed before her eyes so quickly it made her heart stutter.
"Hello! My name is Rainkit, what's yours?"
"I've already decided that you are my new best friend."
"Hey, friend!... Let them hear. What's so wrong about that?"
"You're not okay, are you?... Sorry, sorry, but my mother always does that when I'm crying. Cleaning away the tears so they don't stain, she always says."
"I'll be there for you, always. You want to know what as?... Your soulmate."
"Even if we are separated, it won't be for long."
"I still think I'm dreaming. I never knew if I would make it back or not. I gave up wishing after a while."
"Alright then. Worry about me, Windpaw. I'll worry about you."
"I hope you can find them."
"I have you here. It's never cold with you around."
"From now on, I'm going to make decisions that I want to make. It's my turn to do what I want… Starting with this."
"Will you go on a journey with me?"
"I… I'm not normal. I can never… I don't deserve to be normal after what I've done."
"I was going to tell you, I wanted to tell you… but I didn't want you looking at me like the monster I am. I didn't want you to fear me. I never… I never wanted you to find out this way. I didn't want you to leave me."
"I was… just thinking about how lucky I am. To be here, with you. In this den, in your nest."
"You have my word that I won't go down without a fight. I'll drag myself back if I have to."
"I… I made it back. I tried going as fast as I could, I swear, but-"
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry."
"I want you to keep me for yourself."
"Wind- You have a brother… You should have told me."
"What if that's what it takes? What if that's the only way to win?"
"For once, it wasn't. I swear it wasn't. I… I would remember."
"You always do… You're my soulmate… You've found me."
"You told me not to leave your side. So, I'm not going to."
"You're scared of me… Why? Why? Because when Cloudstar wants somebody dead, he comes to me- don't you ever wonder why?... What don't you understand by now? I'm a monster, Windpaw; they've made me into a monster and there's nothing I can do to correct that because everyone keeps telling me to do it all over again. And I can't talk to you because- because I'm selfish and I can't lose you and I'm just so sorry this is who you get from me."
"No, you love Rainkit. Not me. You love the one who I used to be and who I can never truly be again."
"How can you see me- how can you know me when I don't even know who I am!?"
"I don't- I don't want to be a monster. I don't want to kill her, I don't want to kill anyone."
"It's… It's over?"
"I… I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to, I-"
"I know a place… Everyone just calls it the Faraway Valley. It's past the mountains… I don't want to, but…"
"There's no time, Windpaw. There's nothing we can do."
"Come with me then."
"Windpaw?" She blinked, returning to herself as Rainpaw's voice became crystal clear, her love shuffling the weight between her paws in a nervous manner. She must have been quiet for too long, but can anyone blame her? Rainpaw must have taken her silence as some sort of answer, her smile soft and sad. Always, always sad. "...Goodbye."
The first step was always the hardest.
So, Windpaw was going to take it.
"Yeah," she breathed out before abruptly turning to her side, shoving Bluepaw in the shoulder- and because the tom wasn't expecting it, he fell over. Windpaw stood tall, grinning down at him as he shot her a confused glare. "Goodbye, Bluepaw."
"Wait- what?" Bluepaw gawked… as did Rainpaw. Drippingpaw, off to the side, stifled her giggles.
"You heard me," Windpaw scoffed, hesitating only a second longer before taking her first step off of Stormclan territory. It felt like all the chains and thorns holding onto her, wrapped around every part of her body, began to evaporate as she entered the free world. She paused a step in front of Rainpaw, turning around to speak with the tom who was slowly getting back up. "Try not to mess up Stormclan even more… Although, at this point, I don't know how much worse it can get."
"Wait, wait, wait," Bluepaw shook his pelt out, his eyes wide for a moment before his smile began to appear. "You mean…"
"You…" Rainpaw's quiet voice drew her back to her love, Windpaw softening at the sheer surprised expression on her face. As though she had been expecting her to stay as well. "Y-You want to come with me?"
The corner of her lip twitched upward as she stepped closer to her, nuzzling the top of her head with a slow inhale, "If you'll have me."
"Why would you…"
"Because you're my soulmate, silly," Windpaw let out the breath of a laugh, holding her gently. "I've lost you before and I'm not going to let you slip away again. We're in this together."
"But, the clan."
"You're more important," she whispered into her skin, trying to chase off the trembles that ran through her love's body. "I can't lose you."
"What about your rank? I-I don't want to ask you to choose between me and-"
"It's never been a choice between you and my rank. There's only ever been you, Rainpaw," she pulled back enough for their eyes to meet. "It'll only ever be you again and again and again. I want to come with you, I want to be with you- no matter where that is. Okay?"
Rainpaw looked between copper as if expecting her to take it all back, and when Windpaw didn't, a teary smile blossomed like the stunning flowers that would soon bloom during the incoming Newleaf season. She lunged forward for another tight embrace, a delightful laugh sounding from her, and Windpaw only remained a steady support for her.
She didn't need to be scared of the world or whatever they were going to face. So long as Rainpaw was right by her side, everything was going to be fine.
Her eyes found Bluepaw's again, drifting off to the side where Drippingpaw was sitting a step away with a smile on her face.
"Windpaw," Bluepaw began, "you-"
"Yeah, yeah. I'll take care of her," she cut him off with a purr. "I promise I won't let anything happen to her."
"I was actually going to say you two make sure to watch out for each other, but thanks."
"Why, Bluepaw. It sounds like you're worried for me too."
"I am," her rival turned friend didn't even bother pretending anymore. His fears were for both of them, his love was for both of them. "I care for both of you. So please, watch out for each other."
"Of course," she muttered, perhaps a bit blown away by his words. Bluepaw never admitted to such- and neither did Windpaw for that matter. Their relationship was a strange one, but she wouldn't have it any other way. "You should be careful too. I still think Cloudstar is going to have it out for you."
"I'll handle him," Bluepaw narrowed his eyes, his ears flattening. "And when I take over Stormclan, I'll make it safe enough for you to return. Give me… two seasons at the most."
It always shocked her just how little time they had left as apprentices. Soon enough, they would be warriors.
Well, would have been.
Were they technically rogues now? She didn't entirely know.
Just wanderers.
"I'm not going to say goodbye," Bluepaw shook his head, his expression gentle as he looked at the two of them. "So instead, I'll just say see you later. Please, come home again."
"We will," Rainpaw stepped out of her embrace then, going over to give her brother one last hug. "I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you too," Bluepaw returned it vehemently.
Windpaw watched the two of them before her eyes drifted off toward Drippingpaw again, who seemed to be buzzing with some kind of energy. She rolled her eyes and better faced her sister, opening herself up.
"Come here, guppy."
The calico she-cat was all but a blur as she raced toward her, Windpaw let out an oomph as she was nearly tackled aside.
"Careful there, we're both injured."
"I don't care," Drippingpaw held her tighter and this was the first (and last) time she'd be hugging her sister. How sad. "Please, be careful. I would really like to be able to see you again in the future."
"I'm reckless, not stupid," Windpaw couldn't quite stop herself from nuzzling into the top of her head. Her sister was a lot smaller than her, not quite gaining the height of Sagesplash. "You best be careful as well. I don't know what's going to happen from now on. I can only predict a lot of chaos from this."
A Grand Royal apprentice leaving was unprecedented. (She didn't even think that had ever happened before.)
She grimaced to think of the uproar Bluepaw and her sister would face for the next few weeks.
Drippingpaw pulled away from their embrace, grinning, "I'm tough. I actively sought you out, didn't I?"
"That you did," Windpaw batted at her ears playfully, a soft smile to her lips. "That you did."
The grey-furred she-cat turned then, facing Bluepaw. It was a bit awkward, neither of them quite big on embracing each other.
So instead, Windpaw merely bumped her shoulder against his, Bluepaw rolling his eyes and reciprocating the small gesture.
"Don't go and do stupid things, alright?"
"It's my brand, Bluepaw."
"Be serious for once."
"I am," she chuckled. "I solemnly swear I won't do stupid things."
"Thank you."
"In return, you have to do me a favor."
"Huh?"
"This little brat," she tipped her head to Drippingpaw. "Watch out for her for me."
"Aww, you care about me, sis," Drippingpaw cooed and Windpaw scowled.
"Don't make me take it back."
"I'll do my best," Bluepaw chuckled, meeting her sister's eyes before pleading, "but please tell me you're easier to deal with than Windpaw."
"Hey!"
"Don't worry, I'm the nice sister."
"Alright, now you're bullying me," Windpaw huffed before turning aside, brushing past Rainpaw with a grumble. "Fine, I'm leaving. Screw you guys."
"We love you!" Drippingpaw called as the two began walking off toward the open plains. So much room, so much emptiness. So much freedom. "Be careful!"
Windpaw couldn't help but smile to herself, falling into step with her love and instinctively twining their tails together. Rainpaw looked at her, still imagining for her to change her mind- so, Windpaw pressed even closer to her, licking her cheek as they went up a small incline. The hills in the open space were tiny, the land mostly flat.
They walked in silence for a bit, more and more tiny hills, before they mutually turned to look back toward Stormclan territory.
Bluepaw and Drippingpaw were blurry from this far away. And they were only going to get farther and farther until they disappeared. The willow trees, too. Her home.
No, she looked at Rainpaw beside her, and after a long moment, Rainpaw turned to meet her gaze as well. The two of them, staring at each other with disbelief and a new world all around them. She's my home.
As long as I'm beside her, I'm home.
"So," Windpaw breathed out, a tremble to her voice, the weight of endless possibilities taking the air from her. "What do we do now?"
Rainpaw smiled, bright and free, "Whatever we want."
Whatever we want.
They had the freedom to do so now.
The weight of responsibility, the chains of her rank, the looming presence of the clan…
All of it, gone.
And now, it was only them.
Windpaw and Rainpaw.
And a world just for them.
"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go."
…
Blazeclan
…
When he first arrived into camp with an incredibly injured- possibly dying- Sagepaw, Sootblaze had wanted to keep an eye out for anybody suspicious.
His eyes had instantly gone to Wildfire, but the tom hardly even paid him any notice, merely a passing glance- and because Sootblaze was more preoccupied with getting Sagepaw to the Medicine Den, he couldn't dwell on it for long. Which was a shame, he thought for sure Wildfire would have some sort of reaction that would condemn him.
Unfortunately, Wildfire was a better actor than that.
When he had entered the den, Roseberry had taken one look at who he had on his back and her expression went alarmingly blank for a handful of seconds. Long enough for him to start growing worried, and he was just about to snap at her to stop standing there and do something- because Sagepaw's faint breaths had decreased on the journey to camp- when she summarily kicked everybody who had been lingering around there out. It was clear to the scattered injured cats who would be her top priority, everyone standing aside as Sootblaze came to lay Sagepaw against the offered nest before trailing out.
He was also kicked out of the den, despite his complaints. At least until things settled down for a bit, and he was also ordered to go and clean his own wounds.
So, despite it all, he left Sagepaw in the care of the Medicine Cats and Flame- who was surprisingly helping out everybody there. (Well, at least those who were willing to accept help from a rogue.)
Sootblaze was exhausted. The desire to find his nest to sleep in was overwhelming, every ache in his body pulsing in a way that he wished his heart would stop so the blood could cease to flow. But then he would be dead and that wouldn't be a good thing.
Finding the rest of the Commoners had been his only hint of relief through it all. They were all huddled by the Nursery, their usual spot, each of them carefully checking in with one another and immediately bombarding him when he arrived.
He sagged against Brightstreak while Swiftleaf immediately set about cleaning off the blood from his pelt, Ravenflight berating him for taking so long to return. Owlpelt was silent, beginning to nod off but startling awake whenever someone tapped him. Apparently, he wasn't supposed to fall asleep for a few hours, the head injury giving all of them a scare- but he assured them he was fine. Just tired, like the rest of them.
In hushed voices, he told them about Sagepaw. The state he was in, who had been responsible for it.
Perhaps he shouldn't assume so quickly it was automatically Wildfire, but come on! All of them knew from the very beginning that vile tom had it out for his own son during this battle.
Granted, none of them had actual evidence except-
Rowanpaw.
Rowanpaw had been there, right? "I tried to stop it," those were his words. If he had been there, then he would be their only eyewitness.
...But getting Rowanpaw to stop being so scared of Wildfire and outwardly go against him was a battle for another day. Sootblaze was tired of fighting right now, all he wanted was to rest.
He slipped into the Nursery just to show his face to Feathersong, who breathed the heaviest sigh of relief upon seeing him there and holding him for a long moment. Lilykit and Thistlekit were fast asleep and just the sight of them there, so warm and safe and asleep, made all of his wounds that much more detrimental.
"Thank you," Feathersong whispered to him, nuzzling close despite the lingering stains of blood and the stench of battle on him. "Thank you for keeping your promise. Thank you for being careful."
He felt like crying for some reason, holding them back and simply nodding against her shoulder before he rejoined the others outside. See, he wanted to say to himself, looking around at the other Commoners as they licked each other's wounds clean. He helped them as well, They care about you.
They love you.
Sometimes, he needed a reminder so he could keep fighting. So this was nice.
The energy in the camp wasn't… somber, per se. The best word to describe it all was tired. Nearly everybody had some sort of injury on them, doing the same thing as the Commoners with cleaning each other up, murmuring to themselves. Groups gathered together with the usual divisions, all of them waiting for the remainder of their clanmates to return.
Flarepaw isn't here. He looked around many times and she still hadn't appeared. His nerves were beginning to grow, anxiousness feeding some energy back into his bones and muscles and making him antsy. The other Commoners were beginning to grow weary as well, especially when Ravenflight explained the predicament she had been left in.
But Flarepaw could handle two Stormclan cats in their own river. She was strong, she would be okay.
...Yet, she still hadn't returned- and his heart felt like it was going to burst when Whiteshadow and the group from the main border returned and she still hadn't. Leafstar was their personal escort, and perhaps it was telling the general level of exhaustion in camp that no one made a fuss about an enemy clan's leader wandering about their camp. (Sure, the High Ranks shot her baleful looks, but none of them spoke up.)
So now, after however long it took for him to run around and check on everybody he wanted to check on, to take a second to relax and get himself cleaned up, to realize Flarepaw hasn't returned yet- Sootblaze figured he was allowed back into the Medicine Den. If only to offer his help, or even to persuade Sagepaw not to leave.
Flarepaw needed her brother, she couldn't lose another one.
"I thought I told you to leave, Commoner Sootblaze." They were the first words spoken by Roseberry, who didn't even glance up at him as he entered.
His ears flicked back, flattening against his skull as he grumbled, "I just want to help."
"And the best way to help your friend is to stay out of the way."
"Fine," Sootblaze gritted his teeth, plopping himself down by the den's entrance. "I'll just be right here then."
"Flame," Hollypaw spoke up, completely ignoring his presence. "More pressure here."
"O-Okay," the rogue listened, and despite his stuttering and nervous air about him, he seemed comfortable doing as he was told. Brows furrowed in determination and concentration on the placement of his paws.
"Is he… I mean," Sootblaze mumbled and couldn't quite find the words to finish his sentence. Is he okay? Is he going to live? Is he going to leave just like Thornblaze and Mousepaw? There were so many cuts, so many wounds, so much blood still despite however long it's been since the Commoner dropped him off. But his flanks were still moving, slow and tiresome, but moving. That had to count for something, right?
He couldn't find the will to continue speaking.
Come on, Sagepaw, golden-yellow remained on the broken body of a tom he had never truly seen injured before. Sagepaw had always been so assured of himself. Not having the cockiness of a High Rank, but knowing exactly what he was capable of and proud of himself for it. You gotta pull through.
We still need you.
Now, he suddenly feared for Flarepaw to return right now- when nothing was certain and not even the Medicine Cats could make any promises. If she saw her brother in this state… If Sagepaw didn't make it…
No, stop. Shut up. He was going to be okay, he's going to be okay.
He had to.
His eyes drifted around the den, trying to always find something to do so he could at least help instead of sitting here uselessly. Do something, do something! But what could he do? This was not his world and though he had a bit of experience when it came to cleaning and patching up basic wounds, those were mostly his own.
"What can I-"
"Nothing, Sootblaze," Roseberry muttered with a huff, despondent. It made his stomach clench, already expecting for her to say this was a lost cause, but she didn't. She just shook her head again, concentrating. "There's nothing you can do."
"Perhaps there's one thing," Hollypaw added after a second, her eyes lifting for half a second from Sagepaw up to him and down again. "Where's fireball?"
"Flarepaw?" Sootblaze frowned to himself, glancing over his shoulder as though that alone could make her appear. He shuffled the weight on his paws nervously, "I don't know. She hasn't come back yet."
(He swore, for the fraction of a second, Roseberry froze in all manner of movement after his words before continuing.)
"Well, you can make sure she's not alone when she finds out," Hollypaw continued undeterred. There was a flicker of a frown on her face as she added, "She's going to need someone."
"Is he- he's going to be okay, right?" He finally found the strength to ask his question. Breathing life into a horrible possibility. What if he made it a reality? I take it back, I take it back!
"We've had to officially use the last of the herbs," the black-furred she-cat murmured, her eyes roving over Sagepaw's body. "I just hope it's enough."
It's not a yes and it's not a no.
Sootblaze was going to have to accept it anyway.
I'm sorry, Sagepaw. If only I had come sooner…
What good would that have done? If it really had been against Wildfire, was Sootblaze even strong enough to face him? Certainly not in the condition he was in at the moment, but what's more… If it hadn't been Wildfire, and instead just a Stormclan apprentice, they would have definitely not shown any mercy.
He had to talk to Rowanpaw. As much as he hated it, the Royal apprentice was his only way of figuring out what exactly happened.
"You know what, Rowanpaw? Choose a side and stick to it."
Which side would Rowanpaw choose?
What reason would he have to choose them? After all, they were always the ones losing, always the one getting hurt, always the one failing to predict what Wildfire would do next. They were stuck playing catch-up, stuck playing this game- and Wildfire was the creator of it. He made the rules, he set the stage, he created the limitations.
Rowanpaw was only out of his radar because he was working for him instead- but the moment he stopped…
The Royal apprentice was growing timider and timider as the days went on, so unlike how he presented himself previously. He was afraid, that's all he was. A coward who did terrible things because he didn't want to be the one getting hurt.
Perhaps that made him smart instead of brave.
(Or perhaps he really was just a coward.)
Sootblaze couldn't stay here any longer. He had to do something. Whether it be talk to Rowanpaw and try to convince him of something or go out and find Flarepaw…
Both decisions were taken away from him regardless.
Because Flarepaw came back.
Injured and bleeding- so much blood, so much blood- but still alive and there were so many questions he had immediately, but…
There were more pressing matters.
He almost didn't want to let her inside. She was clearly already hurt, hurt very much actually, why should he worsen that by showing or telling her more horrible news?
But Gingerpaw was insistent, and just this once, Sootblaze gave in and obeyed.
...And immediately regretted it.
Because the instant Flarepaw registered who exactly she was looking at, it looked like she stopped breathing altogether. He had felt his world crash down many times, but seeing it in real time in silver eyes made his heart begin to break. Mistake, mistake, mistake.
You shouldn't have shown her.
Withholding this information probably wouldn't have helped either. This was the lesser of two evils.
"Flarepaw," Roseberry paused for a moment, meeting the eyes of her kin sternly. "I swear to you that I'm going to try my best here, I won't let him leave without a fight. Please, go to your den here and get yourself cleaned."
"Roseberry…" Flarepaw mumbled, and even where he stood beside her, it was difficult to hear. He could see the cracks starting to form on her composure, on her very being, and he so desperately wanted to hold her together and continue holding her until it was over. She could break in his embrace, he promised to keep the pieces nearby so nothing was lost.
"I promise I will do my best," the Medicine Cat made her oath. "Please, I don't want you to see this."
"Sootblaze," Hollypaw's voice caught his attention, making him jump and turn in her direction. She nodded toward the path deeper inside the Medicine Den, the trail that would lead to the personal dens for the Grand Royal apprentices. "Get her out of here."
It was all the permission he needed as he carefully stepped closer to her. Half of him wanted to approach to save her from this sight, but the other half was afraid of hurting her even more. Stars, what did she fight to make her look like that?
It was the most injured he had ever seen Flarepaw- and this was including a fox attack she fought on her own.
He took another step but froze when she took one away from him, not taking her eyes away from her brother on the nest, but she bared her teeth.
"No," a low growl rumbled in her chest, but it was ruined by the emotions beginning to choke her up. Tears formed a glimmering sheen in silver.
"Flarepaw, please," he spoke gently, taking another step toward her. She took one away, backing up into the wall, and he took in a deep breath before stepping in her line of sight. "Please, don't fight me on this."
She'd probably win anyway.
"Sootblaze," there was a warning and there was a plea in her voice and he heard both of them loud and clear- taking another step anyway until he could pull her into a gentle embrace at first. She struggled, trying to tear away from him, "No, please. I can't- I can't leave him. Not again, not-"
"I know," his hold became firmer, her struggles weak. Her wounds must have taken their toll on her if even someone like him could overpower her at the moment. "But you don't need to watch this. Please, let's go."
"I can't," Flarepaw quivered against him, her forehead pressing into his shoulder, the muscles in her body tight as though physically trying to restrain her sobs. "I can't."
"I know," he murmured in a voice that he hoped was soothing. He didn't realize he was beginning to get choked up as well. "If you can't, I will for you."
Sootblaze turned her aside, positioning her toward the path, allowing her to lean against him, and half-pulling her along as they walked. Her attempts at resistance were much too weak, and only once she tried to wrench away from him to go back- but he stepped in her way and guided her along.
Her breaths were ragged by the time they arrived at her personal den. It felt a lot like coming home and it made him a little queasy how his mind could see this place as a sanctuary. It had felt like forever since they were last here…
He wished it could have been longer.
Sootblaze stood at the entrance of the den for a handful of seconds as she stumbled her way to her nest, shoulders drawn tight and the whisper of a sob on her exhales. Still, she didn't break down, and that made him ache all the more for her.
"Was it him?" Flarepaw suddenly turned in his direction with frightening clarity in her gaze, the fur that wasn't matted down with blood beginning to bristle, her jaw clenched and fangs bared. "Was it him?"
"We don't know yet," he padded over to her as passively as possible. "We don't know. But we'll figure it out, I promise. Right now, please… You're bleeding."
"I don't care," her claws pricked at the mossy nest beneath her. "I'm going to-"
"Please," Another step, and he was right there. Within reach. It would take nothing for her to claw him and push him aside to set out on a warpath. Even in her injured state, she'd find the strength to rip Wildfire apart limb by limb. "Please, clean your wounds. We will deal with everything after."
"I was supposed to protect him," Instead of taking a swipe at him, Flarepaw took a step and leaned into him. It nearly made him topple over, his own wounds crying in aggravation, but he ignored them to hold her up. "I promised- he was… I should've…"
"He's alive," Sootblaze whispered into the top of her head, holding her close. The natural scent of wild roses was so faint beneath the blood and the strange freshness of the river's water. "He's going to be okay."
"You don't know that," her voice cracked and he could sense the impending shatterment. He held her tighter. I'm here, I'm here, I'm here. He wasn't going to let her fall apart. "You don't know that, he could-"
"Stop," he cut her off gently. "He's going to be okay."
"I can't lose him." Now, the tears came, the trembles in her body were catastrophic. He wondered if the force of her sobs would be enough to make her bleed all over again. "I can't, I-"
"You won't," he murmured, but it sounded like a lie from his lips. "I promise."
He's going to be okay.
He has to be okay.
They couldn't lose him.
Please, he begged the world as Flarepaw broke down in his embrace, holding him just as tightly as he held her. Please, don't take anyone else. Not right now.
Not again.
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A/N: Pain, hooray! Or, some happiness I guess? Next chapter will be the last of the Stormclan arc, this arc in general I suppose, so fingers crossed everybody!
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Question of the Day
Which sad moment has been the most impactful to you?
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~Wolfcreations21