At the Mystery Shack, Soos was dusting the statue of Stan with his tiny brush while Pacifica was cleaning the window, while Dipper was reading A Song of Earth and Liars by George RRRRRRRRRRRRR Martin while Melody was behind the register, monitoring the cash register.
Unbeknownst to Melody, Soos was watching her with a massive red blush on his cheeks while dusting the Stan statue. It had almost been in a year since Soos and Melody had been going out and they had been amazing. Despite the fact that they spent most of their days running the Mystery Shack.
Soos sighed so lovingly while rubbing his pocket like he was protecting something important.
"Oh Soos, you have been dusting that statue for almost one hour and you haven't been dealing with the incident outside." Soos' Abuelita commented.
"What incident?" Soos asked.
"An incident regarding a fight between some pug smuggler and your former boss." Abuelita replied.
"It's alright!!!!" Shouted Stan from outside and had the pug smuggler known as Santiago in a headlock. "Just knocking some sense into Santiago! And also, I'm finishing the battle!!!!"
Santiago then broke out of Stan's headlock and pulled out a knife which Stan laughed at. "That's cute, bringing a knife to a Stan fight."
Stan screamed and punched Santiago to the ground before doing an elbow dive on him like a wrestler.
"Nah Abuelita, Mr Pines has it covered." Soos assured his grandmother while fiddling with whatever's in his pocket.
"What do you have in your pocket, Mi nieto?" Abuelita asked her grandson.
Soos took a deep confident breath and replied, "Abuelita, I'm going to ask Melody to marry me."
Abuelita smiled gleefully and hugged her grandson. "Oh, que maravillosa!" Abuelita exclaimed. "This is most exciting news Soos. When do you intend to propose to her?"
"I wanna propose to her when the time comes." Soos replied. "I just don't know when the time is right."
"Soos, you should propose now!" Abuelita exclaimed.
"Now?!" Soos asked. "In front of the other couple?"
"They'll be an applause that appreciate your happiness." Abuelita responded. "Oh, I remember how your Abuelo proposed to me."
"Yes, you were both in detention."
"Yes, it was a detention." Abuelita confirmed. "Es mejor que no sepa la verdad. ¡Su tonto abuelo debería haber obtenido nuestros pasaportes!"
"Uh, okay." Soos sighed before walking up to Melody, who was reading some letters that were recently posted. "Uh, Melody, there's something I need to ask you..."
Soos' first attempt to propose to Melody managed to catch the attention of Dipper and Pacifica, who stopped what they were doing and started to pay attention.
"Is this it?" Pacifica whispered to her boyfriend.
"Yes, definitely, absolutely." Dipper replied.
"Y'know, you better do that when you propose to me." Pacifica teasingly suggestion made Dipper blush.
"Uh..." Dipper's response made Pacifica laugh and carefully wrap her arm around his chest and kissed him on the cheek.
Melody didn't turn around because she was still reading the letter she had opened while Soos was stuttering nervously.
"Listen Melody...We...We...We...We...Have been...Together for...Uh...Uh...Uh...A year...And I was...Uh...Wondering if we can take it to the...Next...Uh...Level on a video game...Oh Soos, you are bad when it comes to women...Melody will you marry me?"
"I can't." Melody's reply caused Soos, Dipper and Pacifica to gasp in surprise and shock. "I can't believe that we were invited!" Melody then exclaimed and happily returned around to face her boyfriend.
"Soos, we've been invited to the Northwest party!"
"What?!" Soos asked in surprise.
"Northwest party?" Dipper asked. "Wait, doesn't your Dad usually host those, Pacifica?"
"That's impossible." Pacifica commented. "My father can't host them."
"No, it says your grandfather's hosting it this year due to unfortunate failure that is Preston Northwest." Melody explained. "And that whole thing about Preston is literally on our invitations."
"Wait, our?" Dipper queried.
"Oh yeah, it's not just me and Soos that's been invited." Melody handed Pacifica and Dipper their invites. "The youngest power couple has also been invited."
Pacifica and Dipper started to look at their invites both with a raised eyebrow and confused expressions.
"Why would your grandfather invite us?" Dipper asked his girlfriend. "Doesn't he, kind of hate me?"
"No." Pacifica assured her boyfriend. "Actually, I don't exactly know. I hope not anyway."
"But why would he, no offence, invite Soos?" Dipper asked. "I mean, he isn't exactly rich."
"Oh none taken dude." Soos assured him. "Maybe he just invited me for my charms."
"Or maybe he's adding variety." Melody theorised.
"Maybe he is." Pacifica agreed. "Because, look at the guests. William Zabka, Michael C. Hall, Chip Brille and even..." Pacifica then froze when reading one of the names. "...Oh, that's surprising."
"Please don't tell me he's invited your dad." Dipper begged.
"Oh don't worry he hasn't." Pacifica assured him. "He's invited by Uncle Rick and my Aunt Linda and...My cousin Katie."
"Why is that bad?" Dipper asked.
"I...Don't exactly wanna talk about it." Pacifica replied as she choked a bit.
Dipper knew whatever the reason was, it wasn't exactly a good reason as to why Pacifica kind of choked at the mention of her other family. Sure they were all bad, but Pacifica hadn't mentioned Rick, Linda or Katie before.
"Come on fancy dudes!" Soos exclaimed. "Find your best outfit! We're going to a ball!"
"Yeah!!!" Mabel shouted as she jumped out from behind the counter.
"Sorry Mabel, you weren't invited." Soos apologised.
"Aww what?" Mabel groaned.
"But you know what..." Soos took off the fez and put it on Mabel's head. "...You're in charge little dude."
Mabel smiled. "From now on, you may refer to me as Mrs Miss Mystery!"
"That doesn't-"
"Don't! Don't question it, Pacifica!" Dipper interjected.
Meanwhile at the Northwest Manor, the one owned by Charleston Northwest, the father of Preston was looking out the window holding a glass of apple cider in his hand.
Just then, his butler, Alfred walked in looking disinterested as he usually did. "Sir, three of our guests have arrived."
"Ah, of course they did." Charleston said.
"But I haven't said who they are." Alfred responded just as Charleston walked out of his office to greet his guests.
His three guests, who had just entered the manor, turned out to be, television actor, Michael C Hall; tv personality, Chip Brille; And star of the Kung-Fu Kid, William Zabka.
All men, except for Chip, wore matching suits, while Chip was dressed in his signature yellow suit and a black tie.
"So, Michael, when do you think you and I will make that deal about my massive comeback?" Chip asked the actor who looked quite annoyed.
"Mr Brille, I will tell you when I have my resources." Michael replied, looking annoyed.
"I see, building up the big moment?" Chip queried. "Nice. But I don't have time for that. How about you Bill?"
William Zabka looked at the TV personality with a shocked expression. "Are you kidding me? I'm saving it up for the Kung Fu Kid series where my arch nemesis is the main character and I'm the antagonist?"
"Will there be a rematch between you and Ralph?" Chip asked the actor.
"There will be." Charleston interjected as he approached the three men. "I am funding it as well. It's good to see you again. I kind of doubted you'd come Michael, due to the shocking reviews for the finale of Baxter."
"Yes, they were quite horrifying." Michael agreed.
"Yeah! Talk about a whirlwind!" Chip joked.
"Hey Charleston, was it alright if I brung a plus one?" William asked the millionaire.
"It said so on the invitation." Charleston reminded the famous movie star.
"Well, Charlie boy-"
"Don't call me that." Charleston interjected.
"Allow me to meet, the new town therapist, Jennifer Bracco." William announced.
And in came in Dr Jennifer Bracco AKA Rachel P, wearing a yellow dress and had a bit of frizz in her hair.
"Mr Northwest." The therapist greeted the Northwest with a handshake but he refused it.
"I do apologise, but I don't shake hands with strangers I just met." Charleston said.
"By the way, I forgot to ask, why was bringing sheep in so important?" Chip asked the rich man.
"Oh, I needed some wool, I like it fresh and warm." Charleston replied intimidatingly while the sound of sheep screaming and the noise of what appeared to be that of flames.
Meanwhile, Soos was driving in the truck driving in his truck, dressed in a fancy suit. While Melody was in the passenger seat dressed in a green dress, while Dipper and Pacifica were both in the back seat with Dipper wearing a whit suit with a black coat and a bow tie which was obviously tied by Pacifica. While the blonde Northwest girl was in her favourite emerald dress.
Both Soos and Pacifica were both worried about two separate things. Pacifica was worried about seeing her cousin again while Soos was fumbling the engagement ring in his pocket.
"Wow, my second fancy party in a year." Melody commented.
"Uh Huh." Soos responded.
"I mean, I was this close to going to one of the old Northwest balls with my ex boyfriend who was a magician since he was entertainment." Melody explained. "And I think he might've burnt your mom's face."
"Well, that explains the plastic surgery." Dipper's joke caused Pacifica to glare at her boyfriend which he noticed and raised his hand in defence. "Sorry."
"Just don't joke about my mom, okay?" Pacifica asked, rudely.
"Pacifica, you okay?" Melody asked her employee. "You're usually cool with us riffing on your family. I mean, this is as strange as seeing Soos not keeping an eye on the road!!!!"
Soos screamed and swerved the car and passed a blonde haired girl with a blue dress and pink hearts on her cheeks and bright blue eyes.
"Sorry little dude!!!" Soos shouted from the car.
"That's okay strange human gopher!!!" Shouted the girl. "This isn't the first time I've almost died! I'm quite used to it!!!"
"Soos, are you okay?" Melody asked her boyfriend.
"Well, I've been called worse." Soos replied.
"Not that, you're sweating like crazy and fumbling something in your pocket, what's wrong?" Melody asked her boyfriend.
"Just, I'm at a party with Michael C Hall." Soos lied. "I don't know how I'll react towards him due to how bad the Baxter finale was."
"Well, don't be." Melody requested to her boyfriend, gently. "I'll make sure you don't run into him."
"Thanks Melody." Soos said, smiling.
"Look, sorry for yelling at you." Pacifica apologised. "I just, feel scared about seeing my cousin again."
"Why?" Dipper asked. "Is she bad?"
"Dipper, I don't wanna talk about it." Pacifica responded.
"Pacifica, how bad can she be?" Dipper asked. "I mean, she is your cousin after all."
"Dipper, it's a day I've started to not like to remember." Pacifica replied sadly.
"Pacifica, I may not know about relationships, but I know they're built around honesty." Dipper said to his girlfriend gently. "Please Pacifica, what's so bad about Katie?"
Pacifica looked outside of the window, pulling a face of shame. "It's not Katie, it's me." Pacifica replied.
"What did you do?" Dipper asked.
"It was four years ago at my parent's annual parities, one which happened to have my grandfather." Pacifica replied. "My younger cousin Aaron, turned one and my Uncle Rick and Aunt Linda arrived along with Katie, their daughter. While Aunt Linda was waiting on him to say his first words and my Uncle Rick was complaining about technology, I was told to play with my cousin by my parents, who were busy playing polka with my grandfather, William Zabka and Michael C. Hall. My parents were massive fans of Baxter. My cousin Katie, wasn't like any other girls..."
In a flashback, a bored 10 year old Pacifica was on her phone while a 7 year old Katie, a girl with brown hair, a red dress and glasses was showing her cousin her laptop of all the movies she has made.
"...My cousin Katie, didn't have a lot of friends. She had film. She watched a lot of movies, heck, I think she watched every movie that's ever come out. I mean, she's seen 9 Mile, Finding Bemo, Dangerous Weapon, Lump Fiction, you name it. Anyway, she was showing me the movies she made."
"This is Passion of the Dog, Monchi was very compliant to it despite the torture scene. Don't worry he wasn't harmed." Katie explained.
"Yeah. So glad your pig was okay." Pacifica said sarcastically.
"Actually, he's not a dog, we think anyway." Katie explained.
"Do you have any more films?" Pacifica asked sarcastically. "I am so invested with what films you have."
"Sounded sarcastic, but I'll show it to you anyway." Katie said before pulling a disc out of her pocket. "I call this one Catch Dog If You Can."
"Oh boy, sounds intriguing." Pacifica said sarcastically.
"Yeah. Monchi plays the role of a swindling con-dog while I play the witty FBI agent trying to trace his whereabouts." Katie explained.
"Wow, you made that film?" Pacifica asked, pretending to sound impressed. "I mean, it's no wonder you don't have any friends."
Katie then stared at Pacifica looking heart broken at her cousin's harsh words. "W-w-"
"Don't start, blubbering your lips at me like that." Pacifica snapped at her heart broken cousin as she snatched the movie out of her hand. "This will never get you anywhere in life! This will only get you bullied by people, by being a stupid dork! I mean, why can't you be like me?! I'm hot and have lots of friends! And I have guys swooning over me due to my hot looks. Beauty is all that matters..." Pacifica then threw the disc on the floor and crushed the DVD with her foot, leaving Katie devastated. "...Not this stupid movie life!"
Katie stared at her blonde cousin in sadness and then turned around and ran out of her room, crying her eyes out.
"I never felt guilt for that moment until now..."
"...I just hope she forgives me." Pacifica regrettably looked out of the window while Dipper only stared at her girlfriend, not angry, but feeling a hint of sympathy for poor Katie and also, his girlfriend for feeling this much shame.
In the front seat, Melody was giving Pacifica an assuring look. "Pacifica, I think she'll forgive you."
"I doubt it." Pacifica said sadly.
"Relax dude." Soos assured Pacifica. "She'll forgive you. Heck, her family's like the most normal out of the Northwests."
Suddenly, a car flew in front of them like it just jumped a successful ramp, causing Soos to slam on the breaks aggressive and hard.
Soos, Melody, Dipper and Pacifica froze in shock and surprise at the surprise vehicle.
"WHO DRIVES LIKE THAT?!" Melody screamed.
Pacifica sighed. "That would be the Rick Mitchell Special."
"Huh?"
"My uncle Rick." Pacifica sighed.
Meanwhile, the Mitchell family, including Rick Mitchell, wearing his glasses and a flannel suit and tie was driving like a madman while his wife Linda, whom was wearing a purple dress, was reading a map.
"Okay Linda, which way now?!" Rick asked intensely.
"Well, due to your stupid special, the map is upside-down!!!" Linda screamed.
"Turn it!!!" Rick screamed.
"I don't know which way's the right way!" Linda screamed.
"Katie, are we gonna die?" Four year old Aaron asked his 11 year old sister.
"Aaron...If we do, then I wanna say you were right about dinosaurs having feathers." Katie said.
"Ha! Who owes me 12 dollars?!" Aaron asked, not caring about the threat of death.
"Linda!!!!" Rick screamed.
"I'm trying to find the location!" Linda screamed.
Just then, Rick drove through another ramp, causing the car to fly and then land in a perfect parking space.
The family started to pant heavily before Rick laughed like a maniac. "And that was the Rick Mitchell Special, baby!!"
"Rick...I'm gonna throw up." Linda panted.
Outside, Charleston walked down the steps to greet his daughter, who was throwing up with Aaron patting her on her back.
"Well, well, well, if it isn't my idiot son-in-law." Charleston groaned.
"Hey Dad!" Rick happily shook Charleston's hands.
"And don't call me dad." Charleston said. "I've only invited you because Linda isn't a disgrace compared to Preston."
"Aww, that's sweet." Aaron said.
"Hello Linda." Charleston greeted his daughter.
"Hi Dad." Linda greeted before throwing up again with Charleston looking away in disgust.
"Still better than my son."
"Aww, that's mean!" Aaron exclaimed.
"And am I to assume, you're Aaron?" Charleston asked the young boy.
"I am." Aaron confirmed. "Do you want to talk to me about dinosaurs?"
"Well, here's my summary of their reign." Charleston said with a cold smile. "They lived and then died when fate decided to hit them with the mother of all asteroids."
"That's one of the theories." Aaron said, sounding not insulted by his grandfather's harsh words. "Some say it was due to volcanic eruptions due to a sudden change to the Earth's climate. One of the earliest examples of Climate Change."
Charleston laughed at his grandson. "I already like this one. Better than my disgrace of a granddaughter."
"Hey!!!" Katie exclaimed as she got out of her car holding a video camera. "That's harsh!"
"It's okay Katie." Aaron assured her. "You're my favourite sister."
"I'm not talking about you, Katie! I'm talking about my disgrace of a granddaughter, Pacifica." Charleston explained.
"Hey!" Charleston turned around and saw Pacifica approaching him with Dipper, Soos and Melody not far behind. "Quit calling everyone a disgrace!"
"Ah, Pacifica." Charleston smiled at his granddaughter. "Good to see you again."
"Is it?" Pacifica asked.
"Pacifica!!!" Linda exclaimed as she ran up to her and hugged her despite the vomit on her lips. "It's so good to see you again! Sorry, I've got vomit on my lips. All because-"
"The Rick Mitchell Special." Pacifica interjected.
"That's right my dear niece!" Rick exclaimed as he hugged his niece along with his wife.
"Rick, not too hard!" Linda shouted. "I think I-" Linda's cheeks then swelled up and she escaped her husband's grasp and ran to the nearest trash can.
"Well, this is a pleasant sight." Dipper sarcastically said.
Rick unraveled herself from Pacifica and patted his son towards her. "Aaron, this is your cousin, Pacifica."
"Hi there." Aaron greeted. "I have questions: Weren't you the mean cousin who destroyed Katie's film? Do you want Katie to forgive you? And how would you like to talk to me about dinosaurs?"
"Uh...Well...I..." Pacifica then grabbed her boyfriend and shoved him towards her little cousin. "...How would you like to ask my boyfriend about dinosaurs?" Pacifica then moved her way out of her boyfriend and went to approach Katie.
"So, you like dinosaurs?" Aaron asked.
"I guess." Dipper replied. "I've faced two of them."
"Did they have feathers?" Aaron asked.
"What happens if I haven't?" Dipper asked his girlfriend's cousin.
"Then I will go on a rant that will last 600 paragraphs." Aaron's reply caused Dipper to awkwardly walk into the house to enjoy the party along with Soos and Melody.
Katie was fixing the reel on her camera while being approached by Pacifica. "Hey Katie."
"Oh, hey Pacifica." Katie greeted back sternly before walking away.
"Katie, I just wanna say I'm sorry!" Pacifica exclaimed.
"A Northwest, saying sorry?!" Katie laughed. "As if!" Katie then walked away from the already guilty Pacifica.
Linda then approached her niece and gave her a sympathetic look. "You regret your actions years ago, huh?"
"What gave it away?" Pacifica asked.
"I knew." Linda replied while wiping away some of the vomit off her face. "You just need to give her time to forgive you for what happened. She'll come around. I mean, the Mitchell's don't tend to forgive people. Sometimes it takes like, 8 weeks for us to forgive. Heck, it only took Rick 7 weeks to forgive Michal C Hall for the season finale of Baxter."
"Hey, it wasn't 7, it was only 6." Rick retorted. "And if I see Michael, I'm going to nod and pretend that the Baxter finale didn't happen."
"Charleston!" Michael exclaimed as he walked out of the house. "I think we're out of that specific kind of water I like!"
Rick then narrowed his now red bloodshot eyes at Michael C Hall before clenching his fists and then sliding over the hood of the car like an action hero. "MICHAEL C HALL!!!!!"
"Uh oh." Michael said before throwing his glass away and running inside.
"Get back here!!!!" Rick shouted while chasing the TV actor with his wife far behind.
"Rick Mitchell get back here!!!" Linda shouted.
Charleston then sighed in annoyance. "That's my son-in-law. Disgrace."
Pacifica walked inside her grandfather's mansion which looked more grander than the hall of her house. There was a massive ice sculpture statue of Charleston that stood around 19 feet tall, a chandelier with tons of lights, a red carpet with a picture of a young Charleston along with a younger Linda Mitchell and what appeared to be a little boy with a face covered in red so you couldn't tell who it was. But Pacifica knew it was her dad.
Pacifica looked around for Katie but the place was bustling with a lot of renowned guests. Including John Cruise, Katee Shackoff, Ryan Goslow and Bryan Schmenolyds all chatting about an all star cast movie they're about to do together.
Pacifica continued to look around for Katie while Soos was standing by the punch fountain along with Melody.
Melody moved her glass to the fountain so her glass can be filled with the red liquid, while Soos was drinking a can of Pitt Cola nervously, while fumbling the wedding ring in his pocket.
Soos sighed in nervousness and started to sweat profusely. He opened the can and drank all the cola in one gulp and then ate a tiny cheesecake and then a large slice of cheesecake all while Charleston watched him in the background.
"I can't believe he's gonna be the next contender." Charleston whispered to himself.
"Yeah tell me about." Chip interjected, sounding like he was agreeing with what Charleston said while spitting out an olive. "I couldn't believe he was a contender for my mouth."
Meanwhile, Pacifica was looking around the hall for Katie but she couldn't catch a glimpse of her at all.
Dipper walked up to his girlfriend and placed an unbroken hand on her shoulder. "Hey, you okay?" Dipper asked.
"I can't find Katie." Pacifica replied. "She probably still hasn't forgiven me. Wait, I thought you were hanging out with my cousin."
"Well, he's now talking about dinosaurs with William Zabka." Dipper replied as he used his unbroken arm to point where the two were.
Aaron and William Zabka were discussing about dinosaurs while standing by a dinosaur skeleton.
"And one thing about the Jurassic Zoo movies I can't stand are, they get everything wrong about dinosaurs." Aaron complained.
"And it's not just the scientific advisor they should've fired..." William continued. "...They should've fired the guy who did the continuity. I counted more mistakes in that movie than the ones in The Next Kung Fu Kid."
"Look Pacifica, as your boyfriend I think you need to take your mind off of this." Dipper said. "She'll come around eventually. I'm pretty sure of it."
"I hope so." Pacifica responded while looking saddened.
Dipper's ears then widened once he started to hear what appeared to be a slow song and smiled. "Hey, how about a dance?"
Pacifica stared at her boyfriend with a wide eyed reaction to his question. "Dipper, what about your-"
"My arm." Dipper then removed the cast from his arm and revealed that it was now unbroken. "Thought I'd surprise you."
"Wait, you could've tied your bow tie all along?!" Pacifica asked, shocked and angry.
"Actually, even with two unbroken arms, I can't." Dipper replied.
"But...Still a great surprise." Pacifica commented as she took Dipper's hand.
Meanwhile, Soos was still fumbling the wedding ring in his pocket, not noticing Melody listening to the music playing in the background.
Soos sighed, he knew it was about time he asked the big question. "Melody, is it alright if I ask you something?"
"I know the question and it is a yes!" Melody exclaimed.
"Really?" Soos asked in surprise. "Aww that is wonderful news."
"Well, it's just a slow dance Soos. Not exactly wonderful, more mundane really."
Soos' happy smiled turned into a smaller smile and then took Melody's hand to have a slow dance.
On the dance floor, Melody and Soos & Dipper and Pacifica started to dance slowly on the dance floor, hand-in-hand.
Soos was looking nervous while dancing with his girlfriend, who he really wanted to be his fiancé more then a decent conclusion to Battle of Thrones or a box of nachos with some very gooey melted cheese.
"You okay Soos?" Melody asked her boyfriend. "Your hands are wet? Did you dip your hands in the punch fountain or are you sweating because it's hot? I mean, it is so hot!"
"No Melody, it's not that." Soos responded.
"What is it, babe?"
"Well...I...I...I...I...I...It's a question that really needs asking." Soos stammered while looking away nervously.
Dipper, still slow dancing with a guilt filled Pacifica, gave Soos an encouraging nod while still keeping his hands on Pacifica's.
"Listen Melody, we've been together for about a year and I was wondering if-"
"If you'd like to come with me." Charleston interjected.
"Huh?" Soos reacted.
"Mr Ramirez, I insist you come with me." Charleston insisted. "There's something I need you to do."
"What?" Soos asked.
"Stop dancing with your girlfriend and follow me." Charleston requested.
"But Mr Northwest-"
"Soos, it's okay." Melody assured her boyfriend. "Just tell me what it is when you get back."
Soos sighed. "Okay Melody. I will."
"Come on Soos, this is important." Charleston requested.
Soos let go of his girlfriend and then followed Charleston off the dance floor and up the stairs and walked through the towering doors.
Inside the study were heads of what mammals, reptiles and amphibians. And there were rows of display glasses all over the study with objects that included a metal boomerang with a dark sword, a purple stone that was glowing and a brown Stetson & whip.
"Wow, those are amazing artefacts." Soos complimented.
"Majority of them are fake." Charleston responded before motioning Soos to stand where he is.
The head Northwest walked towards his towering chair and sat on it while drinking some apple cider from a martini glass.
"Woah dude, that's a ginormous seat." Soos said. "I mean, that's bigger then my stomach."
Charleston grinned. "You're quite the observer aren't you?"
"My Abuelita always said I had a keen eye for description." Soos commented.
"She's right." Charleston said. "But not a lot."
"Huh?" Soos asked.
"Question Soos: Did you even notice the lines on my carpet?" Charleston asked.
Soos then noticed the lines on the carpet that looked similar to the shape of a trapdoor. "Wow, it looks like a trapdoor."
"That's because it is." Charleston said before pulling a lever.
Soos froze in fear and then the trapdoor below him opened, but instead of going through, he got stuck due to his large belly.
Soos pulled a massive smile. "Ha! Thank you nacho cheese and junior yum yum meals."
"Yes. Your unhealthy diet really saved you this time hasn't it?" Charleston laughed.
"Not the first time, dude." Soos replied.
Charleston then pulled a stick of butter from his pocket and then approached Soos. "How much does the suit cost?"
"It's not cheap dude." Soos replied.
Charleston grinned and then tore the suit off of Soos, leaving him only in his pants. He then started rubbing the stick of butter all over Soos and that managed to make Soos to slide down the trapdoor.
Charleston towered over the trapdoor and grinned sinisterly. "That butter will help you get a little...Shall we say, crispy?"
Meanwhile on the dance floor, Dipper and Pacifica were still slow dancing, still hand-in-hand. Dipper was trying his best to smile to encourage his girlfriend to lighten up, but Pacifica was still feeling all the guilt in the world.
Dipper knew it was pointless, he knew Pacifica was too down in the dumps to be cheered up by his attempts.
"Pacifica, do you wanna stop?" Dipper asked his girlfriend.
"Dipper, I wish I could." Pacifica responded. "But I still can't get the thought of Katie's wails of distraught. How can I be cheered up when Katie is here and she really needs a sincere apology out of me?"
"Pacifica, I know she'll forgive you." Dipper assured his girlfriend. "She might take some time to forgive you, but she will. I mean, it took me time to forgive you for being the Northwest that you were before."
"I guess you're right." Pacifica reluctantly agreed. "But what happens if I can't find Katie?"
"Well, we're passing her dad, let's ask him." Dipper suggested.
They danced passed Rick and Linda, who were both dancing hand-in-hand with Rick grumbling.
"I am gonna kill Michael." Rick grumbled. "I am gonna kill him the same way he killed the Double Killer in the season 4 finale."
"And now, Katie Mitchell presents: Rick Mitchell tries to kill Michael C Hall!!" The voice of Katie announced out loud.
Pacifica looked up and noticed her cousin Katie was filming her father from upstairs, poking her camera through the balcony.
Pacifica let go of Dipper and started to run upstairs to see her cousin with reluctantly Dipper following from far behind.
But before Dipper and Pacifica could get upstairs they had to get pass the dancers, who were busy slow dancing.
"Excuse me." Dipper and Pacifica said in unison.
"Please out of the way." Dipper requested as he pushed his way out of the dancers. "We need to get upstairs."
"Out of the way, I need to apologise to my cousin." Pacifica requested.
"You did nothing to me." Pacifica looked up and noticed her little cousin Aaron and famous actor, William Zabka, sitting next to a dinosaur skeleton.
"No, not you, Aaron." Pacifica informed her cousin. "I don't think I've done anything to you."
"No you haven't." Aaron confirmed.
"Pacifica, it's hopeless." Dipper commented as he caught up with her. "There's too many people."
"What should we do?" Pacifica asked.
"Maybe I can help." William Zabka offered to the couple.
The couple then stared at the actor like he was suggesting something crazy.
"Mr Zabka I don't think beating people up with Kung-fu is a good idea." Dipper commented.
"Oh no, I'm not gonna beat them senseless." William then gave the couple a trustworthy smile. "Trust me."
William then stood up and then shouted, "Hey, who wants to bet that they can beat me in a fight?"
Everyone stopped dancing and then started throwing money at him which he caught before tearing off the sleeves off his uniform and then unbuttoning some of the buttons, to make him look like a Kung-fu master. "Hai!"
One of the dancers screamed and tried to charge at Zabka, but he kicked the man in the face before he could charge at him.
William Zabka then made a loud scream that sounded like a Kung-fu star, ready to beat up anyone who will come towards him.
"Kids, run upstairs." Dipper and Pacifica ran up the stairs while William caused the distraction.
The actor looked at Aaron and said, "Aaron, this is how we did it back in 1984." William then screamed and started charging towards the incoming challengers.
Upstairs, Katie was looking surprised by how quickly things escalated. "Oh. I guess Rick Mitchell Trying To Kill Michael C Hall is off the table." Katie coughed. "Now, Katie Mitchell presents: William Zabka vs Everyone. Starring, famous martial artist: William Zabka!"
Katie continued to film William Zabka, single handedly beating everyone who was charging at him. But unbeknownst to Katie, she was being approached by her cousin and her cousin's boyfriend.
"Hey, Katie." Pacifica greeted with a gentle high pitched voice. "I wanna-"
"Uh Huh." Katie interjected. "Busy filming William Zabka kicking butt."
"He is good at it." Dipper responded while watching the martial artist with an impressed look on his face.
"I know, right?" Katie reacted.
"Listen Katie, do you have enough footage?" Pacifica asked her cousin. "We need to talk."
Katie sighed. "Actually, yeah. Watching a man in his late forties beat up a bunch of people will get boring after a while."
Katie stopped recording and then walked down the corridor so she can privately speak with her cousin.
Pacifica started to follow Katie, with Dipper close behind her, trying to give her some support.
"Do you need support?" Dipper asked his girlfriend.
"I think so, actually." Pacifica replied.
They stopped at a ginormous painting which had Charleston sitting in a ginormous chair with a young Linda standing next to him and also, a cutout picture of a moustache-less Preston Northwest.
"Wow, they must hate my uncle." Katie commented.
"Katie, you and I need to talk." Pacifica said.
"Yeah. I know you're gonna ask me if I've listened to you and started thinking beauty is everything." Katie guessed.
"Katie, it's not like that." Pacifica assured her.
"Well, what is it?" Katie asked her cousin with her arms folded. "I don't have time for this."
"Time for what?" Dipper asked. "You're not going anywhere, right?"
"Not yet." Katie replied. "I just wanted to say that."
"Katie, what I did four years ago, that was absolutely awful of me to do." Pacifica started. "I really wanna say, that I am so sorry."
Katie stared at her cousin with a sympathetic look before doing her best to not smile and then started laughing her head off wildly.
The laugh was so overlong and loud that Dipper and Pacifica took brief awkward glances at each other.
"Pacifica Northwest, apologising?!" Katie laughed. "Yeah right!"
"But I am serious!" Pacifica exclaimed. "I'm sorry I tried to ruin your dream."
"How do I know Mom and Dad didn't tell you that?" Katie asked.
"Hey! I haven't heard from them until today." Pacifica argued.
"How do I know they hadn't paid you with all the money in my Dad's bank account?"
"Your dad has a bank account?" Pacifica asked. "I honestly thought you might've lived in a shack."
"Yup! There's classic Pacifica Northwest." Katie retorted.
Pacifica froze and then sighed. "Katie, these one year of my life have been rough on me. I stood up to my parents, I almost died at the hands of a ghost, I almost got my scalp cut off because of crazy miniature golf ball people, I survived an apocalypse, I lost the mansion, I worked at the Mystery Shack to make ends meet, I turned out to be a member of a secret society dedicated in wiping out a dark entity from destroying the sun, I also almost died at the hands of vampires and there were a lot of occasions where I almost died." Katie stared at her cousin in wide eyed disbelief leading Pacifica to cough awkwardly. "On a positive side..." Pacifica then nudged Dipper on the arm. "...This is my boyfriend, Dipper."
"Hi." Dipper greeted.
"And...A bad life is supposed to make me feel..."
"I don't want you to feel anything!" Pacifica exclaimed.
"And how much are you paying this poor guy to be your pretend boyfriend?" Katie asked.
"Hey, I don't get payed for it!" Dipper protested. "I mean, do I look like I have money up my sleeve?" Just then, a dollar note poked out of Dipper's sleeve, causing the Pines boy to tap on it to make it disappear into his sleeve. "That money is in my sleeve for a totally unrelated reason."
"Look Pacifica, you trying to gain an apology out of me is commendable, but it won't work." Katie scolded her cousin. "Did you even care about how that film would've helped me get into film school? It took me three days to film and 6 hours of my blood sweat and tears! Face it Pacifica, you haven't changed!" Pacifica stared at her cousin, feeling a tad bit guilt filled while Dipper just placed a hand on her shoulder to give her some comfort. "Pacifica, you will never change. And I will never believe it, even if we get into a life changing adventure!" Katie placed her hand against the ginormous portrait and it caused it to open wide and then started to fall down a staircase.
"Katie!!!" Pacifica exclaimed as she and Dipper started running down the stairs to follow her cousin, who was continuing to tumble down the stairs.
But instead of the bottom, Katie stopped somewhere between the 10th and 12th step. Dipper and Pacifica stopped on the step Katie was on and pulled her up.
"Are you okay, Katie?" Pacifica asked.
"Wow, a Northwest showing concern." Katie laughed. "How strange."
"Katie, please." Pacifica pleaded.
"Alright, I'll stop." Katie said. "For now." The Northwest rolled her eyes at her cousin's sarcasm.
"Hey girls, where are we?" Dipper asked as he looked around the stone walls which had claw marks and pictures of Bill Cipher. The girls looked around with curious intrigue at this bizarre, magnificent location of the manor.
"What is this place?" Katie asked.
"I haven't even been here before." Pacifica said.
"I mean, this is an Carolina Jones level of discovery." Katie commented. "Well, I might say maybe Temple of Gloom."
"Should we like, go explore it?" Pacifica asked.
"Look, whatever it is, I'm pretty sure it's nothing." Dipper replied. "It can't be that serious."
"Dipper, last time I found a secret location in a Northwest house, it changed my view on them." Pacifica reminded her boyfriend. "Who knows what grandpa is hiding."
"I bet it's treasure." Katie said before realising what her cousin mentioned. "Wait, what were your family hiding?"
"The fact they're double crossers." Pacifica replied. "Come on, let's go."
The three started to walk down the stairs with Dipper holding a torch that was stuck on the wall to act as a source of light.
They continued to walk down the spiral staircase which was as long as a monster truck ramp. They continued to walk down the stairs where there were more pictures of Bill Cipher pierced along the walls. A sight that made Dipper and Pacifica a little bit uncomfortable.
"You two look uncomfortable by that picture." Katie noted. "It's just a funny human triangle with a bizarre top hat and one eye."
"Well, believe me Katie, you wouldn't wanna meet him." Dipper commented as they continued walking down where they noticed more pictures of Bill Cipher and even a statue of said dream demon.
"I don't know what to say about this Dipper." Pacifica said nervously.
"Uh...Your grandfather knows the demon that tried to kill us last summer?" Dipper reacted with a raised eyebrow. "I mean, I'd pretty much know what to say about this."
"Woah, you guys must've drank too much cactus juice to be seeing that." Katie commented. "Like in the best episode of Av-"
Suddenly, Katie was interrupted when she, Dipper and Pacifica heard a loud clang once they got to the bottom.
"What was that?" Pacifica asked.
"A loud metallic clang." Katie replied. "I mean, I knew you Northwests were stupid but I didn't think you were that stupid."
Pacifica sighed. "I hope you're not like this in 7 years."
"Can't make promises." Katie said.
Dipper, Pacifica and Katie walked through the gate where they saw armour, gold, pictures of bearded men making false deals with people, a rock with the name 'Mewni' written on it and a red shirt with a bit of white on it saying 'Worn by Nick Frost.'
"These are some strange artefacts." Katie commented. "I mean, this is definitely like Carolina Jones."
"Actually too much." Dipper said, pointing to what appeared to be a golden idol with a warning sign stuck on it.
They continued to carefully walk down the tight corridor trying to find who else is down here.
"Hello!" Pacifica exclaimed. "If there's any monster down here then...Don't eat us!"
"No offering one of us as a sacrifice?" Katie scoffed. "I thought that's what a Northwest would've done."
Pacifica groaned. "Not every Northwest is the worst person who exist."
"Actually, they all are." Katie argued.
"Please you two, don't do this." Dipper pleaded.
"Katie, I get you're angry about all this and I'm sorry." Pacifica apologised. "But I have really changed. I mean, I'm a lot nicer to people then I usually am."
"As her boyfriend, I can confirm." Dipper interjected.
"Yes!" Pacifica confirmed.
"Pacifica, quit your lying." Katie said. "I know a Northwest isn't sorry. Heck, I bet they don't even apologise even after punching someone in the face."
Suddenly, someone popped in front of the three, causing them to scream and Pacifica to punch the person in the face.
The sudden appearance caused everyone to pant wildly, with Dipper somehow keeping ahold of the hot torch in his hand.
They looked down at the unconscious body in front of them and it turned out to be none other then television actor Michael C Hall. A sight that caused the three to gasp in shock.
"Pacifica, you just punched Michael C Hall." Dipper said.
He woke up groaning and sat up to get a good look at his attacker and sat up straight, feeling dizzy over the unexpected attack.
"Oh my gosh!" Pacifica exclaimed. "Michael C Hall! I am so sorry! This isn't for the Baxter finale! This was because you startled me!"
"It's okay." Michael assured her. "Least I was punched by a little girl then a crazy fan."
"Oh, you mean my dad?" Katie asked. "Yeah, I have him grumbling on video. And he said some pretty gruesome stuff."
"That is worrying." Michael said. "Well, it's more worrying that you're related to him. No offence."
"It's okay." Katie assured him.
"Mr C Hall, what are you doing down here?" Dipper asked.
"Hiding from her crazy dad." Michael replied. "It took me ten minutes to hide from him. Heck, he even chased me with a stuffed beaver wielding a chainsaw. And I gotta ask, who would get that stuffed?"
"Sounds like an awesome thing to have stuffed." Katie said.
"If you're Baxter Gordon." Michael retorted.
"Michael, do you know what this place is?" Dipper asked.
"I don't know." Michael replied. "But I found something that will intrigue you. Something bizarre."
"What?" Pacifica asked.
"Follow me." Michael requested and then Dipper, Pacifica and Katie started following the man.
Katie then thought back to what her cousin said to Michael earlier after she punched him in the face. 'Sorry.' Something she thought she'd never hear her cousin say so generously and sincerely. Was it an act? Or was it genuine?
Back upstairs, William was still beating up the party guests by disarming them of their weapons and knocking them to the floor effortlessly.
A random party guests tried to stab him with a broken glass bottle, but he quickly kicked him in the chest and knocked him to the ground.
"You're gonna need a body bag." William quipped before performing a roundhouse kick on another guy. "You're gonna need a doctor." William then kicked another challenger in the place where it hurt the most. "And now I need a quip doctor."
William looked around the hall and saw so many guys and women groaning, due to failing to beat the legendary William Zabka. "Gosh, I don't know my own strength."
William sighed and then sat next to a saddened Melody, who was eating a miniature cheesecake. "Hey Aaron, did you get that?"
"Sorry, I was busy filming the dinosaur skeleton!" Aaron exclaimed.
"You know what, that's actually cooler!" William shouted before turning to Melody. "You okay? Not a fan of martial artists?"
"Actually I am." Melody replied sadly. "Although, I'm not a karate person. I think it's the boring version of martial arts."
"I agree." William said. "By the way, why do you look so down?"
"Well, Charleston Northwest called my boyfriend up to him after he was trying to ask me something." Melody explained. "And, he's been gone too long and it's worrying me. I hope Charleston hasn't done anything mean to him. Because if he does, I'll probably call the police on him since I don't exactly like killing."
"I'd kick his butt if I find out what he did to the lamb I gave him." William said. "Because that was a rent-a-lamb. Anyway, don't be so down, I'm sure he's fine."
"I don't know." Melody said sadly. "I'm worried he might not come back because I kind of got a question to ask him." Melody then reached into her dress pocket and pulled out a wedding ring. "I'm asking my boyfriend to marry me. I know it's too soon to ask this question, I mean, it's been one year since me and him got together."
"Wow! Not the one year part, but breaking the rules on proposing." William commented with a smile. "I love breaking traditional rules. Heck, I even tried to get my first girlfriend to be the one proposing, but no...She expected it to be traditional. I wasn't Robert Redford, I was William Zabka. I couldn't afford a wedding ring. I was busy funding The Next Kung Fu Kid which I think was a good investment until the reviews."
"Should I go check on Soos?" Melody asked. "I should go check on Soos." Melody stood up and walked up the stairs to find her boyfriend who could be her fiancé.
"Hey Aaron, you wanna talk about more dinosaurs?" William asked.
"Nah! My sister's and parents are missing." Aaron replied. "I'm gonna go look for them."
"Okay. See ya!" William replied.
Aaron jumped off the table and followed Melody up the stairs to find her sister and parents.
"Okay, does anyone else wanna go down?" William asked while cracking his knuckles and looking around the hall like he was looking for someone. He then paused and realised he was missing someone. "Wait, where did my plus one go?"
Meanwhile, Dipper, Katie and Pacifica followed Michael C Hall through a small gate which looked rusted and older then Grunkle Stan.
"And before you react, don't question why there's electricity down here." Michael requested before flipping on the light switch to reveal all sorts of pieces of paper all over a table. And some of the cylinders had a statue of Nathanial and Charleston, basically the previous Northwests.
"What is this place?" Pacifica asked. "I don't even remember this."
"Well, you didn't check every nook and cranny." Michael said. "Take a look. I found a lot of interesting stuff."
Katie, Dipper and Pacifica started looking at the pieces of paper with intrigue and curiosity, not knowing what they could be.
Dipper found a piece of paper that said 'A massive history of the Northwests tax evasion and how we evaded them.'
"Wow. This would make an interesting piece of evidence." Dipper commented.
"Honestly, I always knew they evaded taxes." Michael explained. "I mean, I pay my taxes but the Charleston said he'd stop funding Baxter if it continues."
"How many TV shows do the Northwests fund?" Dipper asked.
"The ones they like." Michael replied as he started looking at the history of Northwest tax evasion with Dipper.
Dipper was sweating nervously as he continued looking at the paper, not because of the history of tax evasion with the Northwests but, Dipper was actually a fan of Baxter and he was nervous about being in the same room as Michael C Hall.
Dipper sighed. "Look, I'm not gonna pretend to let this slide, I'm a huge fan of Baxter."
"And you wanna kill me for the Baxter finale and...Wait, how old are you?" Michael asked.
"13." Dipper replied.
"And your parents let you watch Baxter?" Michael asked in surprise.
"Yeah. I was a huge fan of the quadruple killer storyline in season 4 and also, your performance in that season was absolutely-"
"Hey babe!" Pacifica interjected while looking at pieces of paper with Katie. "Try not geeking out."
"Sorry sweetie!" Dipper yelled back before cringing. "Sweetie?! Why did I say that?"
Michael stared at Dipper and Pacifica with a surprise look on his face and then a brief chuckle. "Wait, you're dating Pacifica Northwest?" Michael asked.
"Yes." Dipper replied.
Michael smiled in disbelief. "Come on! I doubt that's true!"
"It is." Dipper replied. "I mean, I never thought this would happen. A ghost hunting obsessed geek from California dating a rich girl from Gravity Falls."
"Wait, you're from California?" Michael asked.
"We're in Oregon for the summer." Dipper replied. "Me and my sister, anyway."
"So, Pacifica's your summer romance?" Michael queried.
Dipper smiled. "Something like that."
Michael sighed, like he was worried about disappointing Dipper. "Do you hope it will last?"
"What do you mean by that?" Dipper asked.
"Dipper, I wish for the best of you, but like with me and Jennifer Carpenter, summer romances don't last forever."
"Huh?" Dipper reacted. "But I thought you and Jennifer Carpenter were married."
"We weren't." Michael said. "It was a sting to creep out a few journalists."
"Um...Oookay?"
While Dipper and Michael continued looking through the documents, Pacifica and Katie were also looking at the others stuck in piles upon piles of paper.
"Wow, your family sure has a lot of disgusting history." Katie commented. "Even Nathanial's waste shovelling manual." Katie then stuck her tongue out in disgust and threw it away.
"Yeah, I reacted the same way when Dipper and his sister exposed my family." Pacifica chuckled. "I can't believe it felt so long ago when we hated each other."
"Look, you can tell me about your love life some other time." Katie interjected. "I wanna ask: Do you mean it? The apology."
"More then anything." Pacifica replied. "Katie, I wish I could stop myself from breaking your film, I really do. Ever since I found out you were coming to this party, I couldn't help but think back to when I destroyed your film. Katie, I'm sorry I ruined your dreams of becoming a filmmaker."
Katie sighed. "Pacifica, I want to forgive you, but...An apology this late will probably take time for me to get used to. But, why made you apologise and try and be nice?"
"Well...It probably started when Dipper's sister shared a taco with me and taught me sharing." Pacifica replied. "But, Dipper, my real boyfriend, came along." The Northwest looked behind herself and smiled lovingly at her boyfriend, who smiled back at her, his cheeks turning red. "He helped me change who I thought I was."
"Aww, that's sweet." Katie said. "I mean, that's amazing that you have a boyfriend."
"Yeah. I mean, I hope it lasts." Pacifica said.
"Why? Is he not from around here?" Katie asked.
"Piedmont." Pacifica replied.
Katie sighed sadly. "You know what they say about summer romances. They don't last...A silhouette?"
"Huh?" Pacifica reacted. "That's not how the-"
"I know, but look at this." Katie replied as she pulled a piece of paper from the pile.
Pacifica and Katie started to look at the piece of paper with intrigue and fear at what it could be. There were four silhouettes of what appeared to be in a lizard in a suit, a teenager wearing a backwards cap, a female silhouette with a crown shaped like horns and an armoured person.
"What is that?" Pacifica asked.
"I don't know." Katie replied. "But it looks like a piece of paper is missing."
"Hmm. Yeah, it does." Pacifica agreed, noting the ripped section on top.
Dipper and Michael soon started to look over the paper with the same intrigue as the cousins.
"Wow. Looks like a piece of art." Michael commented.
"I'd say, more comic booky." Dipper commented.
"Like the Revengers?" Katie asked.
"Exactly." Dipper confirmed. "I mean, it's got the cool shadowed silhouettes of the four main players and an explosive background. Like the awesome superhero movie it is."
"Hmm."
Suddenly, the four heard the sound of what appeared to be snarling and fire coming from a gate.
"What is that?" Pacifica asked.
"Is that a beast wielding a flamethrower?" Dipper asked.
"Sounds a lot like that cheesy B-Movie, Flamethrower Wolf." Katie commented.
Dipper then stared at his girlfriend's cousin in surprise. "Uh...How many movies have you seen?"
"Approximately, 889." Katie replied.
"Jeez, and I thought Baxter finale haters had no life." Michael commented.
"Okay, me, Pacifica and Katie will check what that noise was." Dipper said. "Michael, you try and find the piece to that paper."
"Okay. I am good at puzzles anyway." Michael mentioned.
"Good for you Michael." Dipper commented. "Girls, let's go."
Dipper, Pacifica and Katie started to walk towards the gate, getting ready to face whatever comes their way.
"Is it strange that Michael hasn't made an attempt to stop us?" Katie asked.
"I mean, my skills have been publicised on the Gravity Falls paper." Dipper mentioned before walking into the gate with the girls.
Once they left, Michael pulled a sinister, Baxter style smile. "Good luck Mr Pines, you're gonna need it." Michael then pulled a questionable look. "Hmm, that seemed too sinister. Come on Michael, Baxter's over."
Meanwhile, Soos woke up on a Sandy ground, shirtless and covered in something greasy and slippery. He looked around and saw that he was in some kind of arena with many seats for public attendees.
Soos then licked his shoulder to taste what it is and then squinted his eyes intensely. "Oily butter. Doesn't taste good."
"No, it doesn't."
Soos looked up and noticed a podium where Charleston stood over him holding a glass of apple cider in one hand and a bag of popcorn in the other one. "You're obviously wondering why you're here."
"Uh yeah dude." Soos said. "Could you give me a shirt? I don't wanna look unpresentable when I'm proposing to Melody."
"You're not going to have a shirt." Charleston replied. "Because, I just wanted to ruin that fancy suit."
"Look dude, I'm all for walking down mysterious spiral staircases and surviving the apocalypse, but getting stuck in and falling through a trapdoor is where I draw the line, dude."
"Is it?" Charleston asked. "Soos, you're here for your skills."
"Well, seeing as I'm not wearing a shirt..." Soos said, looking down on his shirtless form. "Do you want me to play music with my body?"
"Soos, that's-"
"Okay." Soos then started to play Straight Blanchin by slapping his stomach repeatedly. Causing it to make ripples that briefly hypnotised Charleston, but he somehow snapped himself out of it and threw the cider on Soos.
"Soos! You're here for your skills against taming beats." Charleston explained as chains started clanging and loud tremors made the ground shake. Startling Soos that he turned around in an instant to trace the noise. "I have heard from a source of mine that you somehow tamed a dragon..." The clanging of chains and the thumping of feet got louder and louder with every step that was made. "...And lived. And if you can tame one dragon..." The steps then grew louder as it approached the gate and then...A bright orange dragon burst through the gate, roaring. "...Then you can tame another."
"Uh dude...What should I do to tame it?" Soos asked.
"You need to tame it so it can be a part of my army." Charleston replied.
"What happens if I don't?" Soos asked.
"Well, then you'd end up like Nick and Simon over there." Charleston pointed to two skeletons. One was facepalming himself while the other looked annoyed.
"Oh my gosh!!!!" Soos exclaimed. "You burnt them?!"
"No, they just starved themselves!" The dragon with a female voice surprisingly interjected. "They just gave up and died."
"Wait, you can talk?" Soos asked.
"All dragons that aren't Bilcome can talk." The dragon replied. "And if you think you I ate them, no, their corpses just rotted away."
"But did they die like this?" Soos asked.
"No, I sometimes mess with their arms so I can believe they died in a comical pose." The dragon replied. "Hey, watch this."
The dragon walked to the two skeletons and moved the skeleton of Simon's arm and pointed his finger straight and stuck it up his skeletal nose. "And, something I kept missing the opportunity to do." The dragon then grabbed Nick's skeletal arm and stuck it behind his butt, making it look like he was scratching it.
Soos then laughed. "I know these poor dudes are dead, but that is hilarious work."
"Aww, thank you." The dragon said. "I mean, dragons like Middle Finger and Palnuts find me-"
"Soos! Quit listening to the dragon's life story and tame it!!!" Charleston demanded.
"But I-"
"Do it!!!" Charleston demanded.
"Look, you might as well try." The dragon suggested. "He usually wants a show."
"Alright." Soos sighed before roaring and running towards the dragon, who fired a stream of fire to the right of Soos, probably intending to miss the current Mr Mystery.
Soos then tried to get on the dragon's back by climbing up the tail, but the dragon flung Soos off her tale, sending him flying to the wall and crashing into it.
"Ow." Soos said.
"Oh no, I am so sorry." The dragon apologised.
"Don't apologise, destroy him if you must!" Charleston demanded.
"Alright." The dragon groaned. "Even though I won't."
Soos stood up and then charged at the dragon, hitting her in the chest. "Ow! That's my chest!"
The dragon tried to slice Soos, but he performed a roll and picked up a shield to defend himself from the fire.
"Oh my gosh!" The dragon exclaimed. "This is the first time someone has picked up a shield to use against me!" The dragon then took a deep breath and fired a massive stream of fire towards Soos, who used his trusty shield to block the fire.
"Dude, your making the butter on my body sizzle." Soos said.
"I know and it smells delicious." The dragon said. "Sorry, I'm afraid I have to-"
Suddenly, before the dragon could get the chance to eat Soos, Melody and Aaron fell from the hatch in the ceiling and on top of the dragon, who groaned in annoyed pain. "Ow!"
Melody was laying on the floor while groaning due to falling for quite a while. She then noticed her boyfriend, who looked at her in surprise.
"Soos!" Melody exclaimed happily before running up to him and hugging him.
"Melody, you're here." Soos happily exclaimed.
"Yeah. Soos, why do you smell like a piece of fried chicken that's sizzling?" Melody asked. "And why are you covered in butter?"
"Short story." Soos replied.
"Hey Melody, I'm on a dinosaur." Aaron said happily.
"Dragon." The dragon replied.
"Well, you're technically a dinosaur." Aaron pointed out.
"That is true." The dragon agreed.
"What are you doing, dragon?!" Charleston shouted. "Get back to burning them alive if you have to?"
"Even your own grandchildren?!" Shouted the voice of Katie Mitchell, who walked in the arena with Dipper and Pacifica.
"Grandpa!!" Pacifica exclaimed. "What the heck?!"
Dipper then sniffed the air. "Wait, why does it smell of deep fried butter?"
"Sorry, my fire does that." The dragon replied.
"Oh my gosh!!!" Katie exclaimed in surprise. "Is that a dragon?!" Katie then started shaking her cousin wildly at the amazing sight before them. "Pacifica, it's a dragon!"
"Honestly, I've encountered a lot of dragons so this is not all that surprising." Pacifica responded.
"Enough!!!" Charleston demanded. "Soos, I need the dragon tamed soon and if it isn't, then you and the others around you will die!"
The dragon sighed. "Look, I'm really sorry about this."
"Look dude, you gotta do what you gotta do." Soos replied.
"Well, I don't exactly wish to be tamed." The dragon explained. "I wish to be free."
"How long have you been here?" Soos asked the dragon.
"Is no one going to explain why a dragon is talking?" Aaron asked as he got off the dragon.
"Aaron, in this town, weirdness is the answer." Dipper replied.
Aaron then pulled a smile. "That somehow doesn't and does make sense."
"I have been here for all my life." The dragon explained. "I have been here since 1972 and everyone who tamed other beasts, tried to tame me, but couldn't. Heck, they didn't even wanna listen to me because….Well….I'm a dragon."
"That's terrible." Melody commented.
"I mean, I may be a dragon, but I don't wanna eat people." The dragon explained sadly.
"Really?" Dipper asked.
"Yes." The dragon replied while licking something. "Why would you not believe me?"
"Because, you're licking me dude." The dragon then realised that she was holding Soos in her hands and licking him.
The dragon placed Soos back on the ground and dusted him off with her foot. "It doesn't help when you smell like a corn dog."
"Nah, it's okay dude." Soos said. "One time, I smelt like fried chicken for two weeks that I started eating my hair, nails and even my own lips. Boy, was Abuelita in an awkward state when she explained my condition."
"I'm sorry, how do you smell like fried chicken?" Katie asked.
"Enough!!!!!" Charleston exclaimed. "I am growing impatient! Soos Ramirez, you will tame this dragon so I can use it as a source of travel!"
"I'm sorry, why do you want me as a source of travel?" The dragon asked.
"Because I'm sick of typical air travel." Charleston replied. "It's too crowded and when I'm in First Class, it's usually crowded. But when I'm with a dragon, I can be on my own and let the breeze be my only company. That and I can also burn the place where they filmed Battle of Thrones due to that awful finale. Tame the dragon, Soos! Tame it!"
Soos stared at the dragon, who looked sad that she'd have to be forced to kill an innocent human being. Soos then got a look at the chains the dragon was tied to and then picked up a random axe. Soos, fearing he might not make it out alive, handed the engagement box to Melody.
"Soos, what are you doing?" Melody asked.
"Open it if I don't die." Soos replied before running up to the dragon and hitting its chains with the axe.
The dragon stared at the kind man, unsure how to feel about the unexpected generosity of this kind stranger. "Th-Thank you." The dragon gave Soos a smile before turning towards Charleston and growling at him.
Charleston, instead of cowering like his son, only stared at the dragon in her eyes as it flew up towards him.
"My name is Kya, daughter of the Elliran Toranya, mother of dragons." The dragon said. "And you, Charleston Northwest will be punished for you crimes."
"Really? Tell that to my 39 lawyers." Charleston retorted while pointing towards 39 well dressed men and women, holding briefcases.
The dragon groaned, knowing that she couldn't defeat 39 lawyers. "And I thought mosquitoes were more heartless." The dragon flew down to Soos, who was still staring at the dragon in awe.
"Soos Ramirez, you have saved me from imprisonment and I thank you for that." Kya said.
"Anytime dude." Soos said. "So, does that mean, you're in my debt?"
"Yes, it does." Kya replied. "Even if I have to clean your toes, it will be a worthy debt to pay."
"Alright, see ya dude." Soos said.
Kya then smiled and turned to Charleston. "Hey Charleston, what would you say to property damage?"
"What do you mean by that query?" Charleston asked.
"This." Kya roared and then burst a hole through the ceiling with a fireball from her mouth, causing debris to almost fall on the humans in the arena, but they quickly ran for cover to make sure they didn't get hit in the head.
"What are you doing?!" Charleston exclaimed. "If you fly up there, you'll destroy a chunk of my home!"
"That's the idea." The dragon said before roaring, flapping her wings and then, flying upwards through the ceiling and then, crashing through the hall floor; catching the unconscious humans and placing them carefully away from the hole; and then, out of the ceiling, destroying the chandelier on the way out and out of the house; Into the night.
"Nooooo!!!!" Charleston exclaimed. "That beast better not have destroyed my study! I have meeting in there!"
Charleston then started to walk away from the standing podium to his study to have a meeting with someone.
Dipper, Soos, Melody, Pacifica, Katie and Aaron looked upwards at the hole in the ceiling, over the incredible experience that had just happened to them.
"Uh…….Will this change our lives by any chance, Katie?" Aaron asked his sister.
"I…..I…I…Maybe." Katie replied awkwardly. "Unless there's a robot apocalypse and we somehow save the world, then maybe."
"Alright, now that problem is out of the way…" Soos started. "…Melody…." Soos then took a deep breathe, now ready to ask the big question. "…..there's something I need to ask you."
Soos turned around and then saw Melody on her knee with an open ring box and inside, a beautiful diamond engagement ring. A sight that was surprising to Soos since it wasn't exactly common.
"Soos Ramirez, for the last 365 days, you had made me the happiest woman in the world." Melody said sincerely. "Well, I wouldn't exactly say in the world, I mean, there isn't a happiest woman in the world contest. Well, I think you know the question I'm about to ask, Soos Ramirez, will you marry me?"
Soos was so overwhelmed with joy that tears had started to form from his eyes while Dipper, Pacifica, Katie and Aaron were patiently waiting for Soos' answer to the question that had been asked.
Soos then smiled and happily replied, "Yes! Yes!! Yes!!!!"
Melody stood up while Dipper, Pacifica, Katie and Aaron applauded over the news. Melody happily placed the ring on Soos' finger and then the two, shared a passionate kiss with each other while there were loud cheers coming from above them.
They looked up and noticed Linda and Rick staring down at them looking happy. "Woo!! You go girl!!!" Linda exclaimed. "That's a thing everyone's still saying, right?!"
"Mom, Dad!" Katie shouted.
"Katie, are you and Aaron okay?!" Rick shouted.
"We're fine Mom." Aaron replied. "We met a dragon."
"Aww, Pacifica's cousins also have wild imaginations." Abuelita interjected, who suddenly popped out from behind one of the arena seats.
"Wait, Abuelita, we're you following us?" Soos asked.
"I like to see you happy, Soos." Abuelita replied.
This piece of information caused the kids to look at each other in discomfort. "Uh….."
"Anyway, I am here to say, that wedding will be in 6 weeks." Abuelita explained.
"Six weeks?" Melody queried. "But, we just got engaged. It's gonna take a lot of planning and-"
Abuelita then laughed. "Oh Melody, I have already made arrangements. We're gonna be having it at the Mystery Shack and I already sent out invitations."
"You're joking right, Abuelita?" Soos asked.
"Soos, you know I never joke." Abuelita replied.
Everyone stared at Abuelita with surprise expressions and then awkwardly looked at each other, all wondering if Abuelita is what she is.
But then, Mabel popped out of nowhere and screamed, "SUMMER WEDDING!!!!!!!" Startling everyone around her.
Epilogue
Charleston walked into his study covered in dirt from the debris that almost fell on him. He walked towards a bottle of apple cider and poured himself a shot in a martini glass. He drank it as quickly as he could, unaware of the guest that was behind him.
"Hello Charleston." Said the voice who drank some Mewnian swamp water. "You're late." The figure walked out of the shadows to reveal to Charleston it was Toffee.
"And who might you be?" Charleston asked.
"A guest."
"But I didn't invite you."
"No, but you invited my disguise." Toffee replied.
"What?"
"Shall we start?" Toffee asked. "Listen Charleston, I don't have a lot of time so I'll cut to the chase: I need a file on the three remaining horsemen on my list."
Charleston looked at Toffee with a knowing look and sighed. "It's come." Charleston then reached into his drawer and pulled out a file and handed it to the evil lizard, who took it and instantly started to read it.
"Hmm…." The lizard contemplated while reading the list. "…The first one might be hard. I don't suppose you have a DNA sample of this, Mason 'Dipper' Pines?"