Snowball Effect

by Tiffany Park

Once upon a time in his youth, Angeal posed as the centerfold for an obscure porn magazine. When he made SOLDIER First Class, Shinra decided to erase its history for PR reasons. A few years later, Reno and Rude find an old copy in a used bookstore and purchase it so it can be safely destroyed. This results in many more complications than if they'd just left it to molder there.

18. Discovery 3: Reno's Vexation

Chapter 18: Discovery 3: Reno's Vexation

Reno and Rude walked back to the Shinra building from another fruitless, frustrating patrol under the plate. The latest tips about AVALANCHE had failed to pan out again, and they had nothing to show for their search. At least they'd gotten a little exercise away from the stuffed suits and stuffy offices, Reno thought with irritation.

And they weren't stuck tearing apart every damned mailroom, peon's desk, and air vent in the Shinra building. That had been a true exercise in frustration. The only useful things to come of the porn hunt had been the placement of a number of new surveillance cameras and an increase in the mail department's budget. That made the mail supervisors happy, but the Turks were still empty handed.

So the search continued. That magazine had to be somewhere. It couldn't have just disappeared into the ether with no trace. Sooner or later, they'd find it. Reno was certain of that. Turks never failed their missions. Even stupid missions.

He and Rude passed by a twenty-four hour drugstore that sold everything under the sun: soap and shampoo, unlocked PHSs, snacks, socks and other casual apparel, hardcopy books and magazines—the whole gamut of whatever anyone might need at any hour, day or night. It was surprisingly busy. Packed, in fact, with a short line of people waiting outside the door to get in.

"Weird," Reno commented. "Whaddaya suppose the rush is all about?"

A woman walked out of the shop, her face buried in an oversized, garishly colored tabloid newspaper.

Rude stared hard at her as she passed by and brushed against him without even noticing the contact. At least Reno thought his partner was staring hard. It was sometimes difficult to tell through those sunglasses.

Rude said slowly, "I believe that tabloid is the big draw. The Midgar Mirror."

"What?" Reno pivoted, but the woman had already disappeared into the crowded street. An awful lot of people seemed to have tabloids tucked under their arms, he noted suspiciously. He turned toward the drugstore just as a man walked out, also concentrating upon a tabloid. "What's the deal with the tabloids? Are all these people here for the Mirror?"

"I'd say so," Rude replied, sounding like he might actually be a little concerned. He waylaid the man. "Sir, could you show my partner the front page of your newspaper?"

"Buy your own copy," the man snapped, but when he looked up at Rude's no-nonsense, intimidating countenance and saw Reno swinging his mag rod over his shoulder, he gulped. "Um, here." He held his copy of The Midgar Mirror out so both Turks could get a good, unobstructed view of the cover page and headlines.

"Veld's not going to like this," Rude said in a masterpiece of understatement. He ran his hand over his bald head and rested it against the back of his neck.

Reno felt like he might explode then and there. "Oh, for fuck's sake! Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuuuuuuuck!"

Taking advantage of the outburst, the hapless passerby clutched his tabloid to his chest and scurried away.

Rude had to restrain his partner from burning down the drugstore.