"Akagi, why are you so keen on our headquarters?" Purifier poured the bottle of sake down her throat.
"I'm just interested in Siren Culture." I smiled forcefully. "Just like how you're interested in ours."
"I am?" Purifier asked.
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"I mean, do you like the alcohol you're drinking right now?" I pointed out. "And how about those professional massages that we got for you?"
"I suppose..." Purifier leaned back against the wall. "So what do you want to know?"
"For starters, how many of these bases do you have?" I gently pressed. "How many homes do you guys live in?"
"Well only one." Purifier stuck her glass out, to which Kaga quickly filled. "It's quite important too."
"Oh." I nodded. "Could I visit it some time?"
"I don't know..." Purifier murmured. "It is deep underwater. You guys probably couldn't make the journey there..."
"But say you surfaced-"
"That's not happening." Purifier wobbled. "Us Sirens are very protective of our home. The only possible reason that it would surface is if we were really desperate or ready to take over the world. Or maybe to release the Super Siren..."
"The Super Siren?" I leaned backwards to mask my interest.
"Ascension." Purifier took the bottle of sake and began to pour it on her head, forming a puddle of booze on the floor. "She's only twenty four percent done assembling, but we're working on her."
"What's a Super Siren?" I asked her.
"Technically, they call it an Ashen." Purifier's face heated red from the vast amounts of alcohol catching up to her. "I don't know the details, but I've heard they'll be stronger than any other Siren made before."
"And that's charging in the Siren's head quarters, right?" I guessed.
"Bingo!" Purifier snapped her finger.
"Then you've got to let me see it!" I pressured her. "Come on, we're friends, right?"
"I don't think I can do that." Purifier leaned against the back wall.
"Then at least tell us- I mean me about her." I nudged her.
"I don't know." Purifier shook her head, before starting to giggle. "Man, you been asking me so many questions! It's like I'm being interrogated~"
"That's insane." I laughed with her.
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"How about we retire for tonight." I motioned to the exit.
"Sound's good!" Purifier, on command, fell asleep on the bamboo mat.
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"Did you get that Kaga?" I asked my sister.
"Loud and clear." She showed me her notes.
"That Super Siren..." I muttered to myself.
"It sounds incredibly dangerous." Kaga finished my thoughts.
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"We have to report this to Mikasa and the Emperor." I decided.
"Alright." Kaga agreed.
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So um...
Long story short: several essays, a couple of writing contests, and just sheer laziness combined into this one overwhelming monster called *Procrastination!*
I'm sorry guys.
Disclaimer: Portland no horni in this family friendly minecraft server
Reviews:
Rick: "A massive Siren Object is rising." Frick It just hit me now lmao. Also Rip the Kaiserreich devs that have to rebuild their mod from the ground up. F
War Corgi: Now that's what we call *Clap Clap* Unintentional Historical Accuracy! But Enterprise survived the kamikazi... Wait...
Nah, I'm pulling your leg.
Severak: *Causally updates three days late* Well this didn't age well lmao.
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"Well that's another stain on my record…" Montpelier muttered to herself, twirling her fork around the assorted vegetables.
"If it helps, I've been the target of multiple restraining orders and court orders, and I'm still doing pretty well." I patted her back. "You'll get used to it."
"But Intrepid might even have a better record than me!" Montpelier complained.
"Intrepid has always had a better record than you." I bit into my dinner.
Montpelier spat out her food as she began to maniacally laugh.
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"No, I'm serious." I shrugged.
"You're kidding." Montpelier's laughs slowly became more sporadic.
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"I'm not." I stabbed my fork back into my plate as Intrepid smugly grinned. "I mean, when was the last time Intrepid got arrested?"
"When was the last time that I got arrested?" Montpelier shot back.
"Three hours ago." Intrepid smiled thoroughly savoring the moment.
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"You could have at least saved me." Montpelier argued.
"You deserved to be arrested." I snorted.
"That's true, but still!" Montpelier whined.
"I mean, that would have been an abuse of power." Intrepid was enjoying this far too much. "Personally, I think you look good in striped pajamas."
"I thank you for your flattery. I hate you for your attitude and tone." Montpelier retorted. (1)
"What else is new?" Intrepid rolled her eyes.
"I will bully you." Montpelier raised her fist.
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"What else is new." Intrepid repeated.
Just in time to prevent a brawl, Louisville knocked on the door.
"Oh, she did come." I interrupted the complicated flirting and made my way to the door.
"I'll get another plate for her." Intrepid walked to the kitchen. "She should have told me earlier, I would've made more."
"You've already made enough for an entire week." Montpelier commented.
"It'll be gone fast." Intrepid reached for a plate as I walked in front of the door. There seemed to be some hushed whispering on the other side. Did Louisville bring a friend? That's sweet of her. I wonder who she could be?
I brushed my clothes once more to look good, and then moved to open the door.
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I froze in shock.
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"Hel-" I ran forwards and hugged Yorktown, bringing us both to the ground.
"Portland!" Montpelier jumped from her chair.
"HOw d-did you survive?" I coughed out in a hoarse voice.
"I'll tell you about it." Yorktown squeezed me, slowly getting up.
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"Not even a greeting?" Hamman raised an eyebrow.
"You know I love you." I rubbed my hands affectionately on her hair. "Come on in!"
I stepped aside from the doorframe and invited them to enter. A bewildered Montpelier followed suit.
"Nice house you've got here Portland." Yorktown unbuttoned her shoes at the welcome mat. "Your living room is gorgeously furnished! It gives some snazzy coffee shop feels. And something about the walls just makes it… snap."
"Perhaps it's because it's finally clean." Hamman snorted. "You're becoming less of a slob now. Good for you, Portland!"
"I did that." Montpelier claimed, moving to introduce herself.
"Not by yourself." Intrepid arrived from the kitchen.
"My name's Montpelier." The cruiser gave out her hand. "Pleasure to meet you."
"Yorktown." The Carrier shook it. "Likewise."
"That's Yorktown?" Intrepid nearly dropped her two steaming hot plates of dinner.
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"Yeah?" I scratched the back of my head.
"Portland, that's the Yorktown." Intrepid ran up to her. "Name's Intrepid. I have a plane I might want you to sign. Also maybe a couple of shirts and a model ship, could you wait here?"
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"Sure?" Yorktown struggled to comprehend what was going on.
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"Oh, and thank you for greeting me too." Hamman quipped. "My name is Hamman, I'm also a famous decorated war veteran and it's so nice that you all respect me so much to say hi. Nice to meet you too. I hope this friendship has nothing but the good will and fellowship from you all."
"Here, why don't you have something to eat?" I nudged the destroyer as she satirically shook her own hand.
"Sure." Yorktown pulled the destroyer along with her.
"Don't you dare put me in a booster seat." Hamman glared.
"Autograph this, please?" Intrepid brought out a souvenir plane.
"Why do you even want it?" Montpelier rolled her eyes.
"Don't you know who Yorktown is?" Intrepid exclaimed.
"Ooh." Yorktown handed a plate to Hamman. "Stroke my ego."
"So this is what happened in flight school." Intrepid recited. "Basically, Yorktown was the first pioneer of naval aviation. Her prototype as the first purpose built carrier gave valuable insight in newer riggings and how to minimize damage. Furthermore, she invented several advanced carrier fighter control techniques that are still used to this day!"
"The Thatcher Weave was a stroke of genius." Yorktown smugly grinned.
"Don't bathe her in this much praise." Hamman warned.
"What about my war participation record?" Yorktown puffed out her chest. "Surely I'm one of the most highly decorated martyrs, right?"
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"You were a very good base example for our Naval Aviation fighting tactics." Intrepid avoided the question.
"But what was I known for?" Yorktown ignored the red flag. "Surely I was credited as a major contributor in the Battle of Midway?"
"We were just kicked around by a Siren-turned Sakura ship." Hamman recalled.
"Shhh." Yorktown put a finger over her mouth.
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"All the credit went to Enterprise." Intrepid admitted.
"Then what about Coral Sea?" Yorktown wouldn't give up on her trivial legacy.
"What's Coral Sea?" Intrepid asked. (2)
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"What?" Yorktown narrowed her eyes.
"The Government censored our loss there." I explained to her. "I thought the same thing as well."
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"So I'm not mentioned at all..." Yorktown gloomed.
"You were a very great naval theorist and big sister." Intrepid consoled her.
"And you're still alive." I added on, carefully hijacking the conversation. "Speaking of which, how did you guys survive?"
"Go for it Hamman." Yorktown reached for her spoon and took her first bite.
"Okay." Hamman leaned back and stretched. "So basically, it all started at Midway. Yorktown and I were both walking back to Pearl Harbor with the rest of you when a ship grabbed our legs."
"I remember that." I nodded cautiously along.
"So we were both pulled into the water." Hamman took a sip of water before continuing. "But somebody put a mask on us. My memory was pretty hazy at that point, so I don't know exactly what happened, but I do recall going unconscious. When we woke up, we were greeted by Kaga and-"
"KAGA?" The utensils fell out of my hand.
"Yeah, Kaga was also fighting the Sirens with us." Yorktown jumped in. "Why did you ask?"
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I sputtered in shock. "The Sakura Empire is fighting the Sirens?"
"Yes." Yorktown nodded. "Did you not know that?"
I dropped back into my chair. Well this changes everything! A peace treaty with the Sakura Empire would actually work now! If the Sakura were still actively fighting the Sirens, we could use their manpower and weapons to help us attack them!
"Can you tell me more about the Sakura Empire and the Sirens?" I asked for her to repeat it once more.
"The Sakura Empire and the Sirens are in a state of war." Yorktown told me. "At Midway, the Sirens betrayed the Sakura Empire and crippled their fleet there. Kaga told me that."
"What else did Kaga say?" I pressed for information.
"That actually ties in with the purpose of our visit." Yorktown mentioned. "Kaga and our old base were just recently destroyed, and we heard that you had kicked the Sirens out, right?"
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"Do you want to stay here?" I inferred.
"That would be greatly appreciated." Yorktown bowed. "We have some plans on how to defeat the Sirens though."
"Really?" I leaned closer.
"Yes." Yorktown nodded. "Kaga and Akagi found out that all Sirens require a battery to survive. Cut the battery, and the Sirens fall apart."
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"So there's a weak point in every Siren, and we have to target it?" I rubbed my chin. Since when did Sirens have a weak point? They seemed be invincible. And to us, they probably still are.
"That is technically possible." Yorktown admitted before shaking her head, "But that would be too unfeasible. No way would the Sirens ever show their weak spot in battle, much less let us hurt it. There's one other way we can prevent them from recharging, though."
"What is it?" I held in my excitement. Now we were getting somewhere! The Sirens do have a weakness that we would be able to target!
"Well, just like all batteries have to be charged, so do the Sirens." Yorktown explained. "Kaga found out that if we shut down or destroy the main way they get energy for their weapons and superstructure from, the Sirens would be rendered useless."
"Well then, what does this charging port look like, and how many do we have to destroy?" I reached for a notepad and prepared to jot down Yorktown's answers.
"There's only one place where Sirens can get refueled." Yorktown pointed a finger upwards. "But that's nearly impossible to wreck as of now."
"What do you mean nearly impossible?" I encouraged them. "As long as there is a will, there is a way!"
"That's not really true." Yorktown checked my optimism. "After all, it is hidden somewhere on the ocean floor."
"Oh…"
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"Wait." I froze, remembering Louisville's report from earlier in the day. "Was this … dark black charging station designed to surface?"
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"I mean, they were only planning to bring the structure to the surface so that it could be used in offensives in the worst case scenario." Yorktown shook her head.
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"Wait." Yorktown caught on. "Why did you know that it was going to surface?"
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"I think we may have found their headquarters." I recalled.
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"Where?" Yorktown reflexively leaned forwards before recomposing herself and sitting back up.
"Several of our scouts mentioned that some monstrous black object rose up from the sea and began to attack them." I explained.
"Well that can't be good…" Yorktown muttered to herself. "That would imply that the Sirens are ready to attack…"
"Ready to attack what?" I shivered. "Us? Azur Lane?"
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"Let's leave that for another day." Intrepid finally interrupted us both. "Perhaps at a later time. We should eat first before we discuss war-plans!"
"But this is serious!" I shook my head violently. "This report could threaten all of the-"
"Well this report should wait after dinner." Montpelier stamped her foot down. (3)
"Yorktown, back me up." I turned to the carrier. Yorktown just looked stunned.
"Maybe tomorrow." Yorktown dazedly glanced at Intrepid and Montpelier. "Yeah, later..."
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"Fine." I conceded.
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"Indy?" I creeped forwards in the murky black hallway. Broken bits of scrap metal and bones clumped along the corners of the pathway. A dimly glowing green light twinkled at the end of the tunnel.
"Indy?" I repeated once more. I shifted my rudder out and brought my turret forwards. The silent click of my armament bay combined with the clang of my dropped magazine echoed forebodingly as I realized that I had no more shells left.
"Indy..." I called out with no real purpose anymore. The fractured pieces of previous ships began to pile up the further I walked. A myriad of the scratched-in hull numbers of the forcefully dismantled lined the burgundy chipped walls.
"Portland?" Indy's syrupy voice faded in the darkness.
"Indy!" I waded through the sea of debris. The ocean of remains slowly subsided as a distinct outline of a figure manifested before the green light. At last, I saw the perfect milk chocolatey skin right in front of me. "Oh thank goodness! You're safe. Let's get home, I don't like this place."
"Can we get home?" Indy was vulnerably sitting on her knees, legs splayed out. "I'm scared…"
"Don't worry!" I took advantage of the situation and began to curl my hand around Indy's slimy hair. "Everything's going to be-"
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Wait.
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Slimy?
That's not right. Indy's hair is a soft silky…
Indy's skin began to peel off. Her heterochromic eyes dulled into a lifeless black before dilating into sickening yellow.
"What's wrong?" The sugar in her voice putridly rotted. "Isn't everything fine?"
Tentacles bursted out from her backside as I stumbled backwards, pointing my ammoless weaponry at the Siren.
"Portland?" It smiled.
I jumped out of my sleep and slammed my head against the top of the bunk bed.
"Dear Indy…" I rubbed my forehead before reorienting myself. That was horrible… Since when could I no longer control my dreams? I really could have used a p*** photo shot dream right then.
I cracked my knuckles before sleepily opening the door and walking to the living room.
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"How did you do that?" Yorktown whispered in a hushed tone in the kitchen.
"It just takes a lot of practice." Intrepid boasted.
"That's actually amazing!" Yorktown nearly shouted. "I was with her for a whole year and I could not even get her to do a single healthy or normal thing! And the Indy doll! Oh my god Portland would never let me clean it and it was just straight up filthy! How did you even get her to wash it?"
"Just a little intellectual prowess." Intrepid flexed. "I'm sort of like the parent of the group."
"You're actually insane." Yorktown walked out of the kitchen, bringing a tray of breakfast with her. "Oh hello there Portland! Didn't know you wake up early these days."
"It's an acquired habit." I decided to pretend I didn't hear their gossiping. "So, are we going to talk about the Sirens later?"
"Sure." Yorktown nodded before turning to Intrepid and silently mouthing "Oh my god, she's responsible now!"
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"Which one's mine?" I asked, looking at several cups of coffee.
"This one." Yorktown handed me a mug. "It's your favorite. The Indy Special!"
"Okay." I took the mug and downed it all in one go.
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And then I promptly regurgitated the liquid.
"Portland, are you okay?" Yorktown quickly brought me a towel, panicking. "I must have messed up the recipe! Maybe it was four creamers?"
"It wasn't four creamers, but something must have been wrong." I wiped my mouth free of the liquid sugar. In no way was that the Indy Special. Or at least it didn't feel like it. I haven't had a sugary coffee in a long time though...
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"...Well at least that's a good wake up call." I laughed it off.
"I'm pretty sure that the recipe and preparation was right." Intrepid muttered.
"I must have messed up somewhere." Yorktown took responsibility.
"Maybe." Hamman yawned as she walked into the room in Montpelier's nightgown. "Morning."
"Good Morning." Yorktown passed her a plate of eggs.
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"Say, you're the head of the Eagle Union now, right?" Yorktown broke the silence.
"Yup." I reached for a strip of bacon before being stabbed by Intrepid's territorial fork.
"I would have sworn that you would have placed Indy in your dorm, or at least have her live in stalking distance from you." Yorktown noticed. "Where is she now?"
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"Indy is dead." Intrepid responded.
"Oh dear God!" Yorktown rushed to me, wrapping me in a suffocating embrace. "It's okay, Portland. Everything's going to be fine."
"That's right!" Hamman consoled me as fast as she could. "Indy might still be out there! Don't give up hope and-"
"No, it's really fine." I gently tried to push them away.
"I'm so sorry for your loss." Yorktown continued onwards. "I know Indy must have been like a sister to you."
"No, It's actually fine." I laughed it off. "Indy died a while ago. I got over it…"
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Did I say something weird?
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"You got over Indy?" Yorktown trembled.
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Oh dear Indy. Wha-What just ha-ha-happen..? Did I just d-denounce the holy church of Indy? Preposterous! I'm the head priest, and that would be hearsay. But I had gotten over Indy... No, I couldn't have possibly done that. Just earlier today, I had a dream about her. But was that dream about Sirens or Indy? I used to be able to lucid dream on command about Indy; if I lost that skill, am I losing my faith in Indy? But my belief in her still stays strong. Indy is our savior! But even though she is dead? Even- no wait, the correct move as the head priest is to deny Indy's death as our holy savior wouldn't have been killed from the likes of Siren scum. But I should have thought that in the first place without hesitation. Perhaps my faith is wavering. But if my faith was wavering, then why do I still exalt her? Just the other day, I proselytized her word and skimpy clothing to several non-believers in the officer corps. But was that just routine or a real sermon? It had to be a real sermon. But did I teach with the passion that I used to do? The officers did seem a bit bored. No, that can't be right. The officers had to be paying attention. Anybody who forgets about Indy is going to burn in hell with the devil and the fake Indy. But would I go to hell then? I'd almost gotten over Indy, after all. I need to mount my faith on the rock of Indy's luscious succulent buns and melt into her tenderly smooth skin as I slowly grip from inside her undergarments, tearing apart her bra as I pin her to the ground, devouring on the sweet nectar as she moans in the delight of my ravaging of her petite little body before I-
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"Okay." Yorktown wiped the drool off my face. "Never mind. She's still crazy."
"Hmm?" I tipsily grinned whilst savoring my wondrous day dream.
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"In business news, we still need to get more people for the raid Portland had mentioned." Montpelier snapped her fingers. "I'm assuming you guys are in?"
"Well, I suppose we can't back out now." Yorktown smiled.
"Yeah!" Hamman pounded her fist against her open hand. "Time to slap some Siren butt!"
"Butts…" I groaned euphorically.
"For the love of…" Montpelier slapped her head before turning to Yorktown. "She was so productive and you just reset her to 1933! All this progress, gone to waste!"
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"Sorry about that." Yorktown sheepishly chuckled.
"Intrepid, it seems like Portland is incapable of making an announcement in this state." Montpelier announced. "You're coming with me to do it."
"But I wanted to spend the day with Yorktown." Intrepid pointed out. "She's a war her-"
"I said, we are going." Montpelier stomped a foot on the ground.
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"Fine." Intrepid let Montpelier pull her along.
"You better fix her by the time we get back!" Montpelier shouted before exiting the room.
"Okay." Yorktown shouted back before the door abruptly slammed shut.
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"Are you sure that's possible?" Hamman pulled on Yorktown's sleeve. "If there's anything I remember about Portland, it's that we can't alter her when she's depressed or horny."
"Well… if we could get her to become a horny monster, then we can get her out." Yorktown cracked her knuckles. "How 'bout we go for a swim."
Footnotes:
(1): Tsunderes in a nutshell
(2): Coral Sea DEEZ NUTS! HA GOTEM!
(3): On a side note, I want Montpelier to step on me now...
TMI? TMI...
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"Just you wait until Portland figures this whole thing out!" Bluegill growled. "You'll be begging for your life and groveling on the ground."
"Who's in the cage, me or you?" Independence crossed her arms. "Now be a good girl and shut up."
"I will personally see that you get executed by a gruesome death once I get out." Bluegill promised.
"Then you're never going to get out." Independence wiped her hands before tossing a bread crust at the submarine. "You should be lucky that you are alive."
"Oh, you can't kill me." Bluegill scoffed. "I'll be a pain for as long as you- mmphhh!"
"Now honey," Independence tightened the gag. "I have a very important meeting with Anti-Portland resistance members. You're gonna have to be quiet for a bit."
Bluegill stuck her middle finger up.
"I'll make sure to chop that off if you don't cut it out." Independence glared as the door creaked open behind her.
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"Oh, hello Baltimore." Independence smiled. "Pleasure seeing you here!"
"This is only for business matters." Baltimore reminded her. "I never said I was going to help you at all. I was just merely interested."
"Well interest is good enough for now." Independence compromised. "Welcome to the National Reclamation movement!"
"I never said I was joining." Baltimore repeated.
"Fair enough." Independence nodded before checking her watch. "It should be time for her to arrive though."
"Who's her?" Baltimore asked.
"Why obviously, a counter rebellion won't work without powerful allies." Independence explained. "This double agent is by far the most influential one in the Eagle Union now."
"I doubt that." Baltimore called the bluff.
"Well, you're in for a surprise." Independence pointed behind her. Bluegill collapsed to the floor in shock. Though muffled, you could hear a distinct "You're with her?!"
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"Baltimore, meet our Carrier." Independence welcomed her in.