Disclaimer: I do not own any of the material appearing in this story.
BGM: Keelhaul Key (Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door)
"There we go, Kupo. Aloe-soaked bandages! This will help with the itching, kupo."
"Thanks." Sora smiled as he walked out. "Alright, let's go!" He said and with a nod, they would head off toward the bridge… but as they crossed, Noire would notice something.
"Huh?" She looked down, seeing some kind of ice power up underneath the bridge. "What's that?" She wondered as she went underneath the rope and landed on the ground, picking it up. It felt cool to the touch as soon as she picked it up.
"What even is this?" She wondered as she put it in her pocket and went to rejoin the others, then she spotted a wedding ring on the ground. "What…?" She tilted her head, picking it up as well as she rejoined the others.
"This is what we had found." Bobbery said, staring at a wall. "These rocks… they should mean something." He added. "Plus, there's this hole in the wall that is in the shape of a small skull."
"Are you suggesting there's something behind this wall?" Sora asked.
"I'm certain of it, boy." Bobbery said. "Now if we can just figure out a way to get inside, we're golden."
"Can we just carve a rock into a skull and call it good?" Luigi asked.
"Yeah, like that "football" you "chiseled" from a stone?" Mario teased.
Luigi sweatdropped. "Uh… well…"
"Wait a minute!" Vivian said. "I recall seeing something like this earlier… be right back!" She said and then went underground, and then Flavio shot out of the ground.
"WAAAAH!" Flavio yelped as he landed on his back. "Ooof…" He grunted as Vivian popped up. "What is the meaning of this? I was drinking away the back pain I received from Bobbery landing on me!"
"I landed on your head."
"My back was in pain too!"
"…Are you just going to drink all of the Chuckola Cola?" Noire asked with a hint of an annoyed tone.
"No! We share drinks in this crew… and all of you are sharing your drinks to me, so fair is fair!"
"Oh sure, this is coming from the guy who wanted to split the treasure 99-1." Vivian said.
"WHAT?!" Noire yelled.
"Somehow, I'm not surprised." Bea said.
"Oooh, maybe we can flip it around!" Aerith said. "We get the 99% and he gets the 1%!"
"WHAT?! Now hold on a minute!" Flavio said.
"Why? You said this crew "shares", right? So we share our drinks, and you share your treasure." Aerith smiled.
"…You drive a hard bargain, woman… if I was still captain of the ship, I'd be throwing you off the plank!"
"Just like you did when the first sign of danger arrived?" Aerith smirked, causing Flavio to sweatdrop.
"Well, I… uh… okay, why did you drag me here!"
"You have a skull shaped rock we could use." Vivian said. "It's for the hole in the wall."
"The jewel? Pffft! And why should I do away with it?"
"Because if you don't, you'll drink up all the Chuckola Cola and we'll die of thirst." Noire pointed out.
"It's called rations!"
"It's called greediness!" Noire aimed her sword at him, the tip of the blade just inches from his face. "Now are you just going to leave us here high and dry or are you going to give us that so-called jewel?"
"Alright, alright… fine… maybe just for a little bit." Flavio said, handing it to Vivian. "But only for a little bit!" He warned.
"Thank you~!"
"Well, that was easy." Sora said as Vivian put it inside the hole and then the two statues nearby lit up. "…Okay…?"
"Well… good luck figuring this puzzle out!" Flavio said.
"Simple. You hit the big guy four times and you ground pound the little guy three times." Koops said.
"WHAT?!"
"I mean… if we're not hearing Sora fudging up a shanty, we hear you singing about hitting and groud pounding some statues." Koops pointed out.
"I really should've written it down…" Sora sheepishly rubbed the back of his head as Luigi hit the bigger statue four times while Mario ground pounded the smaller statue, and then a plank opened up on the wall underneath the bomb symbol.
"Hoist me up there!" Bobbery said as Sora threw him up, then he walked into the hole. "BOMBS AWAY!" He yelled and then exploded, destroying the wall.
"Ah yes, very good!" Flavio said. "Now I can-… wait a minute, WHERE'S THE JEWEL?! YOU FOOLS, YOU BLEW IT UP AND-" The jewel landed next to him. "…Oh! Never mind. Carry on!" Flavio said, picking it up and ran off.
"He's… something, I'll give him that much." Nocturne said.
"He's getting on my nerves." Noire said.
"I think he's getting on all of our nerves." Bea said as they walked into the cave.
End BGM
BGM: Pirate's Grotto (Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door)
"Oooooo! Oooooooo!"
"I… think we went into the wrong cave." Luigi said.
"No… I think we're in the right one." Bea said as they worked their way down the first area by dropping down a few ledges and then they went into the next area where they were met with Embers and Lava Bubbles, not to mention there were spikes rising up from the ground and there was a destroyed boat that had a lever on it.
"Hmm… I wonder…" Noire mused, pulling out the item in her pocket. "Does this work on these guys?"
"Hmm?" Bobbery turned to Noire. "Ah! I've heard about that item… it supposedly is very cool to the touch and if you use it, you're practically immune to fire attacks."
"Really?!" Noire's eyes sparkled.
"I think it's a spray…" Bobbery mused. "Try and spray it on us." He requested as Noire did so, where an icy mist was sprayed out and the misty particles landed on everyone.
"Oooh! A little chilly!" Nocturne said. "Achoo!"
"Alright, let's get rid of these guys!" Sora said as they proceeded to do just that while Bea went over and grabbed the lever.
"Can we get past these spikes?" Koops wondered.
"Let me try something." Sora said, firing a Blizzaga as a line of ice lay on the ground as he hopped on it and sped off… only for the spikes to rise up halfway. "YAAAAGH!" He yelled as he was launched back and landed near the others. "Nope… that won't work…"
"Maybe… stopping time?" Aerith guessed.
"Oh!" Mario nodded, pulling out the Emerald Star and throwing it on the ground, stopping the spikes from moving. "Let's-a go!" He said as they hurried across and then time resumed right as Bobbery stepped off.
"Phew, barely made it." Bobbery said as they went into the next room where they were greeted by Bullet Bills from some Bill Blasters. Bea would punch a Bullet Bill… only for it to explode in her face.
"Oooh!" Aerith winced. "Are you okay?!"
The smoke cleared as Bea coughed out some soot. "…I was honestly expecting that to turn around by blunt force." She said, blushing a little.
"Well, that's the problem… you don't know your own strength." Mario pointed out as Noire, Luigi and Koops nodded in agreement.
"Maybe if you tried kicking it?" Aerith suggested.
"Nah, I got it." Sora said, using Reflega on the two of them as they bounced away and went inside the Bill Blasters where they exploded.
"That's better." Bea said, wiping her face as they went into the next area where they would see a waterfall, a gate and a device where they could open up a metal gate. Bea would hook it onto the device and she rotated the lever as it would rise up from the water.
"Ooooooo! Oooooooo! Tuuuuurn baaaaaaack!"
"How about "just move forward"?" Aerith smiled as they would hop across the watery gap and went on.
"I dunno… I think "Keep moving forward" has a better ring to it." Koops said.
"Oooh, catchy!" Vivian said.
"That's… something I should've heard a long time ago." Bobbery said as they went into the next area where they were bombarded with Parabeetles but Noire and Sora would block the Parabeetles and knocked them down to the ground as they would then walk out the door and would see spikes shooting out of the wall.
"Oh, lovely!" Luigi sweatdropped.
"Ah, that's not so bad… we can crawl under." Mario said as he would duck down and would start crawling, but would notice some spikes were poking out to where they couldn't safely crawl through. Mario sweatdropped and backed away. "Or not!"
"Let me guess, sharp spikes poking out in the crawlspace?" Luigi asked.
"Yup."
"Welp… that's a bummer."
"Not for long!" Sora grinned as Mario would throw the Emerald Star down to stop the spikes as they hurried through and then time resumed for the spikes to resume poking out of the walls.
"Phew!" Noire smiled as they walked ahead, wandering around a Bulky Bob-omb meandering around as they would go into a shipwreck and found the last black treasure chest.
"That's the fourth hero…" Aerith said.
"Yup." Sora nodded as they walked over to it and without saying a word, Sora would unlock the chest with his Keyblade and opened it up.
"Zzzzz…"
"…Uh, hello?" Noire asked.
"Zzzzz…"
"Wow, he's knocked out cold." Mario said.
"Zzzz… mememememe…"
Bea would shake the chest. "Hey, up and at 'em!" She said.
"Zzzzz…"
"Wakey wakey~" Aerith smiled.
"Zzzz…"
"Shall I explode to wake him up?" Bobbery asked.
"I got a better idea." Noire said. "Oh mister fourth demonic hero… wake uuuup~!"
"Zzzz… five more minutes, mother… zzzz…"
Noire's eye twitched, pulling out a megaphone and put it up on high volume. "HEY DOOFUS! WAAAAAKE UUUUUP!" She screamed as everyone covered their ears.
"WAAAAAH!" The demon jumped out of the chest. "WHAT! What is it that you want! Can't you fools see that I'm trying to get my beauty sleep here!"
"Well, that's one way to wake him up…" Sora winced, rubbing his ear with his finger.
"WHAT? I can't hear you!" Nocturne yelled.
"…Wait a minute, I'm free? I'M FREE! WEEHEEHEHEHE, FOO-"
"Yeah yeah, we know… mister "hero", we met your friends and they "cursed" us when in reality, they helped us out in the long run." Sora said.
"…Beg your pardon?"
"Yeah, we met three of you guys." Koops said.
"Aaaand it proved to be beneficial!" Vivian smiled.
"Aaaah shoot… so you've been through this song and dance before?"
"Yeah… although, I'm curious." Mario said. "If you guys are the heroes of the past, then why are you so… hostile?"
"I was gonna ask the same thing." Luigi asked.
"Well, if you're stuck in a chest for a thousand years, you too would lash out on anyone that opens the chest." The demon pointed out. "It does bad things to your head, man! It ain't pretty. You can thank that Shadow Queen for that… cursing us and we've been enchanted to act all mean and "curse" you, then we fade away…"
"But none of us are cursed." Bea said. "If anything, it's just power ups."
"Indeed… it's more to stick it to her than anything." He said. "What we wouldn't give to watch that demon perish…"
"Then "curse" us." Noire said. "We'll be the ones to destroy this demon behind the Thousand Year Door."
"The seal is weakening… and the Shadow Queen is powerful. Do you have what it takes?"
"We do." Aerith said. "All of us have faced someone powerful before. Xehanort, Sephiroth, Eternatus-"
"Technically, Gloria and Hop took care of that one." Bea mumbled. "But I might have helped out…"
"And… I don't know what Noire faced… probably some flamboyant stalker guy who exposed her cosplaying secret." Aerith shrugged.
"Uuuuh… does an alternate version of me taking down Rei Ryghts count…?" Noire sweatdropped as they all looked at her weirdly. "Don't ask… it's complicated."
"And we've taken down stronger bad guys other than Bowser!" Mario added with Luigi nodding. "So how bad the Shadow Queen actually be?"
The demon, or in this case, hero, chuckled. "I suppose you are right… but perhaps I should give you a boost here real quick." He said as the shadow cast over Sora and Aerith.
"Wha…?!" Aerith said in surprise.
"For you, spike haired boy… I curse you with THIS!" He yelled as Sora had transformed into his Final Form, and then into his Limit Form.
"Ah, cool!" Sora grinned, turning back to normal.
"As for you, lady… I sense Holy Magic within you. So I will curse you with THIS!" He yelled as Aerith transformed as Sora would see her in in an elegant white gown, angelic wings popped out of her back as her eyes glowed a white aura.
"Whoa!" Sora exclaimed.
"I curse you with… Holy form!"
Sora raised an eyebrow. "Holy form? Really?"
"I… am honestly not sure what to call it. You got any better ideas?"
"Um… Celestial form!" Sora said.
"How about… Blessed form?" Aerith suggested.
"Yeah, okay, that works." Both of them agreed.
"…Is that all of them?"
"Actually, I don't think Noire had been "cursed" yet." Sora said.
"Who's Noire?"
"The one with the Megaphone."
"Got ya." He said as the dark void expanded and grabbed a hold of Noire.
"WHA?! Why was I dragged into this?!" Noire yelled. "For the record, cursing me would be overkill because I have HDD!"
"Can't go wrong with another curse, bibbity boppity BAM!" The demon yelled as Noire glowed and found herself in a new outfit, complete with a lance and a dark aura surrounding her hands. "Henceforth, you are cursed with… the Black Knight form!"
"Huh, ya know what? I could get used to this." Noire said, changing herself back to normal.
"Now then… I will finally rest and hope the Shadow Queen is dead for good…"
"We won't let you down." Sora said and then the demon disappeared.
"Well, I guess he wasn't so bad then." Luigi said as they nodded and then headed off where they would spot a boat panel.
"Huh? What's this?" Vivian wondered.
"Looks to be some kind of… platform of sorts. Probably a docking station." Bobbery said.
"A docking station? Please… who would want to drive a boat all the way through this mess?" Noire rolled her eyes.
"Hmm…" Sora mused and then the Diamond Star came floating out as it took a dip into the water and formed into a Diamond Speed boat. "Whoa!"
"Ooooh!" Aerith grinned.
"Now that's a way to travel!" The Mario Bros said in unison.
"What was that you just said?" Bea teased.
"Oh… shut it." Noire mumbled as they got on the boat as Sora would take control.
"Do you even know how to drive?" Luigi asked.
"I mean, I've steered a ship before. How bad can it be?" Sora grinned as he looked down. "This is just… like… how to… control… a… uh… huh…" He sweatdropped.
"That's a negative." Bobbery said.
"No no, I got it… uh… what's an… ignition?"
"Oh for Lastation's sake, let me take the wheel." Noire said, pulling him away and then getting the boat to start as it roared to life, then they took off.
"Oookay, that works too." Sora said, rubbing the back of his head.
"…Wait, we could've done this without needing Flavio." Nocturne said.
"But then we wouldn't have met this wonderful guy!" Vivian pointed to Bobbery.
"Ah, quite the flatterer, are ya?" Bobbery said with a blush as they would soon reach the gate they opened earlier and would soon reach an area where the waves would be coming for them.
"Ack!" Noire yelped, steering her way around the waves. "Hang on! It's gonna be a bit bumpy!" She said.
"Ooooo! Ooooooooo! Tuuuuuurn baaaaaaack!"
"Kinda hard to turn back!" Noire exclaimed as she weaved through the waves until she drove into a tunnel.
"Hey, I think I hear something!"
"Yeah, me too!"
"OVER HERE!"
"What the?" Sora wondered as they got closer as they saw several shipwrecked Toads.
"Heeeey, that's a glamorous boat!"
"Shiiiiinnnnyyyy…"
"That's shinier than silver eyes! …Why did I say that?"
"Got room for one more?"
"Uh... I think we can get a few of you on board." Noire said. "Just don't-"
"EVERYONE GET ON BOARD!" A Toad yelled as they all dove for the boat.
"-DO WHAT YOU'RE ABOUT TO DOOOO!" She yelled as they started to weigh them all down.
"One at a time!" Bobbery yelled.
"This doesn't feel right!" Nocturne yelled, a bit muffled.
"Mama Mia!" Mario exclaimed. "Luigi? Luigi!"
"Mmmph! MMMMPH!"
"I think we lost him!" Bea exclaimed.
"DO WE LOOK LIKE A YACHT?!" Noire yelled, trying her hardest to get to a docking station, and once they did, the Toads hopped out of the boat.
"Gaaaah!" Luigi said, covered in footprints. "Why me...?" He groaned as they got out, then the Crystal Star reformed and went back in Mario's pocket.
"Thanks for saving us! Now... how do we get out?"
"Uh, we're working on it." Sora said.
"Wait a minute..." Vivian spoke up, noticing two Piantas in the crowd. "You're those two Piantas from the pier!"
"And you're that broad who kidnapped us and brought us to the boss!" Frankie pointed out. "What the hell, woman! You could've just asked us nicely and we would've gone with you!"
"...I did."
"You did?"
"Yes!"
"Hey, your boss is looking for you." Vivian said. "He seems pretty upset that you're kissing up on his daughter or something."
"Gah! He is?"
"Oh daddy..." Francesca groaned.
"Yeah, so if you could come with me, we can get this settled."
"Oh... baby cakes, maybe we oughta go check up on the boss..."
"Frankie, are you nuts?! No! The boat is almost here!"
"We can come back to it after we check up on the boss. It'll be a snap!"
"...Frankie, do you love me?"
"Of course I do, doll face!"
"Then we shouldn't let daddy worry. You and I both know he doesn't like our relationship, so we're eloping whether he likes it or not!"
"...Ya know, you're not wrong. I like my head, thank you very much."
Vivian sweatdropped. "Okay, I've heard enough." She said, grabbing the two and yanking them down into the shadows.
"Ooooh, that's right..." Frankie mused. "Still, YOU COULD'VE WARNED US YOU WERE ABOUT TO TAKE US TO THE UNDERWHERE!"
"Do I look like the harbinger of death to you?" Vivian sweatdropped.
Noire would look down at their hands, noticing Frankie didn't have a wedding ring on but Francesca did. "Hey, you looking for this?" She asked, tossing it to him.
"My wedding ring!" Frankie exclaimed, taking it. "Thank you!"
"Wait, you dropped it?!" Francesca yelled.
"One of those ghosts must've taken it from me."
"So you let them take it! I thought you loved me."
"I do!"
"...Then say it to me."
"I love you!"
"Not good enough! You need to say it ninety nine more times!"
"NINETY NINE?!" The heroes yelled, as even Bea and Bobbery looked appalled.
"Woman, you're killing me here!"
"I'm not hearing anything!"
Frankie sweatdropped. I knew I should've dated that chick from Delfino... He thought. "I love you, I love you, I love you-"
"Leeeet's-a just keep-a going..." Mario said.
"Agreed!" The others said as they booked it out of there.
"WAIT! WHAT ABOUT US?!" The Toads yelled.
"I love you, I love you, I love you-"
"How spiteful can a woman be...?" Koops asked.
"Apparently... that level." Aerith said, scratching her head.
"I know I can be catty, but I'm not that bad!" Noire mumbled.
"Glad Daisy is not like that." Luigi said.
Or Kairi. Sora thought.
"What's a ship doing in here?" Bobbery wondered as they walked further.
"Hmm, do you think the Crystal Star could be in here?" Luigi asked.
"One way to find out." Mario said as they hopped onto the ship and walked inside.
"Oooooo! Ooooooo! You have ignored my waaaarniiiiiings. There is no other waaaaaaay... come closeeeeer..."
End BGM
With a nod from everyone, plus one nervous Luigi, they walked into the next room, finding themselves in a room filled with treasure, including the Sapphire Star.
"Oooooo! Oooo... What am I doing! Pirates do not moan!"
BGM: Cortez's Theme (Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door)
A skeleton head popped up in front of them. "I am Cortez, once a feared pirate treading these waters but is now cursed upon this island! And you... YOU ARE AFTER MY TREASURE!"
"Wait, you got the wrong idea!" Sora exclaimed.
"Y-Yeah, can we talk this out?!" Luigi agreed.
"SILENCE! I will purge you from this land until you are nothing but BONES! AVAST YE!"
End BGM
BGM: Boss - Cortez (Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door)
"We have no choice but to fight him!" Bobbery said.
Cortez grew arms and a spine, holding two scimitars. "Have at thee!"
"HOLD IT!"
*Record Scratch*
Noire would walk up front, tapping her foot impatiently. "Do we look like thieves to you?"
"You are after my treasure!"
"We're here for that!" Noire said, pointing to the Sapphire Star. "We're collecting these Stars for a good cause." She said as the Crystal Stars came up.
"Oh, there's more of them? And they're for a good cause?"
"Yes."
"I'm gonna be honest, I was planning on throwing that one into Davy Jones' locker. It was just an eyesore."
"There we go."
"However! I desire a trade."
"A trade, you say? Then what is it?" Noire asked.
"I desire a red jewel. It has been taken from me and the heart of this ship." Cortez said. "Without it, this ship cannot move."
"Wait, are you talking about a red jewel that is shaped like a skull?" Mario asked.
"That'd be the one! Have you seen it?"
"Yes, actually. It's in the hands of-" Noire trailed off, her eye twitching. "In the hands of... of..." A fiery aura surrounded her. "OH, THAT NO GOOD SON OF A..." She turned around, storming off. "Bobbery, I could use you for a second!"
"Aye!"
With Flavio...
"Aaaah, nothing tastes better than a delicious Chuckola Cola!" Flavio chuckled as he let out a loud belch. "Alrighty! Time for another-"
BOOM!
"FLAAAAAVIIIIIOOOOOOOOOO!"
"...Suddenly, I feel like I'm in danger." Flavio said as he would peek from the crate and see Noire on the war path, along with an army of Toads and an exhausted blue Pianta behind them along with a happy female Pianta behind her.
"Uh oh! She's on the war path, kupo!" The Moogle exclaimed.
"Ah, Noire! Happy to see you alive and well. What can I do for-" Noire grabbed Flavio by the collar. "Yipe!"
"You need to come with us. Now."
"Why is that?"
"Because Cortez demands you hand over that red jewel you have immediately!"
"Hahahaha, I suppose that can be arranged... if you do me a small favor."
"And that would be?"
"I desire a Whacka Bump, made from the finest of Whackas. See if you can fetch me one and then maybe I'll hand it over."
"Oh, okay, you want me to sort your laundry while I'm at it!"
"Oh, that would be swell!"
Noire snarled, immediately heading over to a tree and yanked off an apple, then she came back. "You see this apple?"
"Yeah? It looks like a Honey crisp, why?"
"Why? Oh, I'll give you a reason why." Noire tossed it up in the air and swiftly slashed the apple a few times, where she snapped her fingers as the apple split into many pieces.
"One slice for each of us?"
"No. That is going to be you if you don't HAUL YOUR ASS OVER TO CORTEZ IN THE NEXT FEW MINUTES!"
Flavio paled up. "C-Cortez, you say...? L-Lead the way then...!" He gulped as Noire grabbed his arm and dragged him away, grumbling to herself.
Within seconds, Noire threw Flavio into the Captain's room. "Found him!"
"Ooof!"
"So, you have my red jewel, amigo? You stole it from me!"
"Ack! C-C-C-Cortez!" Flavio yelped, trying to hide behind Bea but she would side step away from him.
"Admit it! You stole it."
"Now now… let's not draw conclusions so suddenly! This has been a family heirloom!"
"So your ancestors have stolen it from me!"
"Aheheheh… my grandfather mentioned that his grandfather saw this jewel lying around on an island so he took it for himself…"
"Yargh… one of my men was having it cleaned. He must have dropped it without realizing it… rrrrgh! And I told him to take extra care of it too! When I find the one responsible for that, I'll kill him!"
"But he's a ghost." Luigi pointed out.
"I'll revive him and KILL HIM AGAIN!"
Luigi sweatdropped. "Ooookay…"
"So… I propose that we do a trade!" Flavio said. "I hand you the jewel, and you give me 99% of your treasure and I'll leave you with 1%."
An anime tic mark appeared on Cortez's head and sluggged him. With his hook. "DO I LOOK LIKE AN IMBECILE TO YOU, YA GREEDY BUFFOON!" He yelled as Flavio hit a wall.
"Mmph! Alright alright alright! 98-2!"
"No!"
"…97-3?"
"We split it 70-30! And you best pick a god and pray to know who gets the thirty percent… amigo."
A shiver went down Flavio's spine. "U-uh… um… noted!"
"Personally, I'd say 90-10." Vivian said.
"Yaharhar! I like that even better!"
Flavio sweatdropped. "Oh dear…" He groaned as he pulled out the red jewel and slowly gave it to him… when suddenly there was a loud explosion and the whole area rumbled.
"What in blazes…?" Cortez wondered.
"Everyone!" A voice called out as Pa-Patch came running in. "Terrible news! This island is being… holy moly, is that Cortez the legendary pirate?!"
"Yes, it is. Now what is it, lad?" Bobbery asked.
"This island is being attacked by a hostile ship! To make matters worse, Four Eyes is manning the ship! …Though he's calling himself Lord Crump, and he has Storm Cloud with him! …Though it's… Thunderbolt… I think…? Whatever the case, those two are attacking the island!"
"Hmph! They are attacking my home, are they?" Cortez narrowed his eyes. "Amigo! The jewel! Do not drop it!"
"Ha! My hands are made out of sandpaper. Nothing falls from my grip!" Flavio said.
"Except for being the captain of the ship…" Koops snarked as Flavio gave him a glare and handed him the jewel.
"Ah yes, my ship roars to life again!" Cortez said as he handed the others the Sapphire Star. "Now then…let us have ourselves a grand return!"
Outside…
"Sink this entire island to the ground! No survivors!" Crump yelled. "Get the Crystal Stars from their cold dead hands!"
"I've a bad feeling about this." Lightning said.
"Nonsense, Thunderbolt! It's not like-"
"You dare attack my island? You have some nerve, amigo!"
Right on cue, the rocks shattered as Cortez's ship sailed out of the rocks.
BGM: Boss - Cortez
"WHAT THE?!" Crump yelled. "Bah, whatever! Fire at that ship! It's not like they'll-"
Suddenly, the ship surprisingly jumped into the air and hovered over Crump's ship. "…Jump….?!"
"That's a good idea." Lightning said as she dove into the water.
"…Mother." Crump whimpered as the ship landed on the bow of the X-Naut ship, acting as a catapult and sending Crump and some X-Nauts flying toward the island. "YAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"
"Amigo, did you just make this ship jump?" Cortez asked.
"What? Like it's difficult?" Sora shrugged.
"…Teach me your ways, amigo!"
"That's enough ship jumping for me…" Noire groaned.
"Attention crew mates! Have yourselves a battle against these interlopers!"
"And we'll take care of that loser!" Sora said, looking toward the island and then Airstepping toward it.
"Hey! Wait up! We want a piece of him too!" Noire said, immediately going into her Black Heart form and picking up Bea and Aerith as she flew over toward the island while the others were taking care of business on the X-Naut ship.
End BGM
"Rrrgh… that tears it. Get me Magnus Von Grapple!"
"But sir, there's still a few bugs we have to iron out!"
"DID I STUTTER!"
"N-no sir…"
"Then get me my mech!" Crump ordered as the X-Naut let out a sigh and then pressed a button as Magnus Von Grapple 2.0 materalized. "Buh huh huh huh!" He chuckled as he turned around as he saw Sora, Bea, Aerith and Noire approaching them.
"Alright Crump! You want another butt stomping?"
"I don't recall getting my butt handed to me by you!" Crump said.
"Yeah… but this time, Thunderbolt isn't here!" Sora pointed out.
"True, true…" Crump nodded. "But never mind that!" He would then get into his mech. "BEHOLD! MAGNUS VON GRAPPLE 2.0! Now with 50% more lethality!"
"I say it's time we test our our new abilities, wouldn't you say?" Aerith smirked.
"I'm so with you there." Noire said.
Bea pulled out the Fire Flower from her pocket, crushing it with her hand as she absorbed it. She immediately jumped into the air and glowed brightly. Her hair grew longer down to her lower back, her eyes became yellow, red sleeves appeared on her arms while metal chainlink gloves appeared on her forearms and went up to her elbow. A white chestplate appeared on her chest as a Mega Stone appeared in the center as red pants appeared on her legs as the bottoms of the pant legs turned yellow to represent flames as shoes made out of iron formed on her feet.
Bea landed on the ground and cracked her neck. "So… this is what it feels like to be a Blaziken." She said to herself as she got in her battle stance, where Noire would go into her Black Knight attire, Aerith going into her blessed form and Sora going into his Limit Form where he summoned the Oathkeeper.
"You think that should impress me! HA!" Crump chuckled. "Have at you!"
BGM: Magnus Von Grapple (Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door)
Magnus Von Grapple aimed and fired rockets at them, but they would quickly avoid it as Noire would run over and swung her spear, stabbing it a few times before she was kicked away, but she would stab the ground to stop herself as Aerith clapped her hands together and raised them up, as a massive storm cloud appeared over Magnus Von Grapple's head as massive Thundaga-like lightning bolts struck him from above.
"Rrrgh! Get a load of THIS!" He yelled, as the X from the mech would fly off and start rotating as it would fly at them, but they would roll out of the way as it returned as Sora ran over and used Zantetsuken while also slashing away, and then Dodge Rolled out of the way.
Bea closed her eyes, pounding her fist into her palm as an aura surrounded her as she took a deep breath, and then reopened them. "Now I'm focused." She said as she charged ahead as she jumped over, her foot catching ablaze and unleashing Blaze Kick.
"Mmmph! Alright, let's see if you like this!" Magnus Von Grapple would suck up some trees, berries, Cheep Cheeps and even coconuts as he would then proceed to shoot them like missiles, but Noire formed a dark barrier to block the attacks… and then the "ammo" suddenly turned into darkness.
"Let the shadows swallow you up!" She said as she snapped her fingers as they were shot back at Magus Von Grapple.
"Rrrrgh! Like a few palm trees will do much damage!" Crump said as Sora unleashed Sonic Rave on him before unleashing Ripple Drive on him, then Aerith raised her staff up high as a meteor came down and slammed into Magnus Von Grapple. "Gaaaaagh!"
Bea would flex her muscles, feeling herself powering up. "Alright… Bulk Up followed by…" She closed her eyes as she felt herself surrounded by fire as she opened them and then charged at Magnus Von Grapple with a Flare Blitz at blinding speed, striking the mech.
"Waaah!" Crump yelped as he retaliated with firing missiles but Sora would reflect them back while Bea jumped back while holding on to her shoulder.
Damn… that's gonna hurt for a while… She winced as Noire slammed her spear into the ground as dark tentacles would come out of the ground and pummeled Magnus Von Grapple before they disappeared after a few seconds.
"Rrrgh… alright… Now let's get ready for the grand finale… WHERE ALL OF YOU WILL PERISH!" Crump yelled… but then his machine started to malfunction. "Wha?! …Oh no, don't tell me these bugs are ruining everything!"
Sora pulled out the Sapphire Star. "Now let's see what this bad boy can do!" He said, as it started to glow… and before they knew it, massive cheese wheels would appear everywhere on Magnus Von Grapple, including a few of them next to Crump.
"Buh… wha…?"
Sora would feel a tug on his hair as he looked up to see Remy having appeared on his head. "Oh hey little chef! Got some food for ya!" He said as Remy nodded, turning around and whistling as he and the girls turned around to see Remy's entire colony running toward the cheese.
"Whoa! Where did they come from?!" Sora said.
"AAAAAH!" Noire shrieked, immediately jumping away as Aerith would grab Sora and Bea as the rats ran past them. "Gross! Ewwww!" She said as Remy jumped off of Sora and began to make quick work on the cheese and… funnily enough, Magnus Von Grapple.
"Get off of me, you pests! I DO NOT WANT THE BUBONIC PLAGUE! GET OFF OF ME!" He yelled as one of the rats pressed a button by accident while munching on the cheese.
"Self destruct sequence activated. One minute until detonation."
"SELF DESTRUCT WHAT NOW?!" Grodus yelled as he looked at the button in question, then spotted another one next to it.
"Press this button for an extra powerful "oomph" to your attacks. - Thunderbolt."
"Thunderbolt, you haven't let me down!" Crump said, punching the button.
"Self destruct sequence quickened. Five seconds until detonation."
"WHAAAAAAAAAT?! …Meep."
BOOOOOOM!
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Crump yelled as he was launched into the stratosphere, complete with a star shining brightly in the sky.
Amazingly though, the rats were somehow unharmed from the explosion as they all waved harmlessly at Sora before disappearing.
End BGM
"Ya know what… I'm not gonna question it." Noire said as they all nodded as they went back to normal.
Lightning watched Crump fly into the sky. "I see he's found my present…" She smirked with a small chuckle.
"Our leader has lost! Let's get out of here!" An X-Naut exclaimed, picking up Lightning from the water as they hightailed it out of there.
"Good riddance, ya scurvy dogs!" Cortez exclaimed. "AND NEVER COME BACK!" He yelled as Sora and the girls walked back to the others.
"So… you ready to head back?" Sora asked.
"Yeah! I'm ready to get off of this island." Noire said as they all climbed aboard Cortez's ship.
"Alright, next stop… Rogueport!" Cortez exclaimed as they set sail for Rogueport.
They don't call it Sweet Feast for nothing.