Notes: Here's some dumb married Rodydeku eheheheuheue

Many thanks to CSakuraS for betaing!

Connie

Generally speaking, Izuku didn't have many worries in being married to a pilot.

People would ask him, sometimes, if he wasn't concerned about possibly losing Rody in a plane crash. It wasn't a nice thought by any means, but he knew that, statistically, the chances of Rody suffering injury or death on the job were infinitesimally smaller than the chances of Izuku suffering the same as a pro hero. So, no, that didn't worry him any more than he thought was reasonable.

And while having Rody away from home for more than half the week was difficult at times, Izuku didn't worry much about that, either. Izuku himself was kept incredibly busy with his own career too, and on the days that Rody was home, there was no sign of strain in their relationship, and they shared a perfectly healthy sex life. He had no reason to suspect that Rody would ever even consider being unfaithful while he was out of sight.

In theory.

And yet, here he was with Rody at home, just the next room over as Izuku busied himself with washing dishes, and he could clearly hear Rody engaging in a phone conversation that was... a little concerning.

"No way! Really?"

It started out innocuous enough, nothing more than an enthusiastic chat with a work friend, and Izuku couldn't help but smile at the unbridled excitement in his husband's voice.

"You mean that Connie? Dude, I'm so jealous, can you— yeah, yeah, send me a pic of her!"

...

Connie? Who was Connie? That was enough to catch Izuku's attention, but not enough to be too concerning. A little suspicious that Rody was asking for pictures of some woman—more suspicious still that he had expressed jealousy over her—but there were plenty of reasonable explanations. Maybe Rody's friend had a new girlfriend, and he was just building up his friend to feel proud of the burgeoning relationship. Rody was Izuku's husband, something as minor as that wouldn't be grounds to entertain the notion he wasn't holding up his end of their vows.

"Yeah, yeah, I just got the photos you sent! Oh man, she is a beaut, huh..."

That... was fine. Sure. There was no reason that Rody couldn't make the objective observation that a woman was beautiful. None at all.

"Man, you got that right. Talk about sexy..."

Izuku's fingers clenched around the plate that he was drying, making tiny plink sounds as cracks spiderwebbed in the ceramic. Okay... okay. That was fine too. Just a step up from calling her beautiful. Still nothing to worry about. Right.

"Don't tell me you... ohhh, shit, you lucky bastard! Man, what I wouldn't give to take her for a ride, too..."

As calmly as he could, Izuku placed the cracked plate in the drying rack before his quirk could shatter it completely. That... he was not okay with his husband talking like that. He'd have to have a serious discussion with Rody as soon as he was off the phone.

"Wh— Man, seriously?! Yeah, yeah, dude, hook me up if you can! I'd kill to have a go at her myself..."

Fuck that, the discussion was happening right now.

The rag gave a somewhat satisfying thwack when Izuku flung it onto the edge of the sink, but it still did little to ease the sickening rage churning in his stomach. He turned to stomp heavily out of the kitchen. To think that Rody, his Rody, would be so shameless to... to make plans to cheat on him! And not even trying to hide it! And to think that he would participate in passing around this Connie woman like she was nothing more than a toy, a tool, an object...!

Izuku marched into the sitting room, where Pino was flying joyous, excited circles—eliminating the very last shreds of doubt that maybe Rody was only putting on an act to humor his friend. Whoever Connie was, Rody was truly, genuinely looking forward to having his way with her. Channeling that additional stab of betrayal into fueling his anger, Izuku planted his feet in front of where Rody sat, pinning him with the fiercest glare he could muster.

"Rody," he said, tone flat and commanding, cutting off the brunet's cheerful chatter. "Hang up that phone. Now."

His husband blinked up at him, clear confusion in his eyes. "What? Why? I'm in the middle of talking with—"

Enraged even further that Rody wasn't remorseful enough to immediately cease his actions, Izuku snatched the cell phone and terminated the call himself. "I can't believe you!" he bit out sharply, voice trembling with rage and the beginnings of tears that he fought to keep from shedding. "I never would have thought— never, in this or any life, would have ever imagined that you—"

"Wh— wait, wait wait wait!" Rody jumped up from the couch, and Izuku took a step back before he could reach for him or the phone, glaring daggers. "Izuku, honey, what's going on?"

"Some nerve you have trying to play dumb!" Izuku spat, numbly aware of plastic shards digging into his skin from the phone case shattering in his hand, but that kind of pain was the furthest from his mind. "You knew that I was in the next room, you knew how brazen you were being, talking about all that with me in earshot, and now you're trying to pretend it didn't happen?!"

Rody was utterly baffled—as was Pino, and that was enough to chisel the first, tiniest chip of doubt in Izuku's furor. His husband wasn't an idiot. He would have known precisely what he was doing. So why was he so genuinely confused?

After blinking through his stupefaction for a moment, Rody held up his hands in a placating gesture. "Izuku, just— calm down for a sec. Exactly what did you hear?"

"Everything!"

"Specifically, please. What do you think I was talking about?"

Izuku grit his teeth as he squeezed the phone even tighter. He didn't want to say, didn't want to put the awful thought into words, but... if there was even the smallest possibility that Rody truly didn't know, that there was some other explanation for what Izuku had heard, then—

"You were talking about cheating on me with Connie!"

Silence fell upon the sitting room. Rody's face was slack for a beat, until he shut his mouth, drawing his lips into a thin line, trembling in a way that Izuku knew meant that he was holding back laughter. He could easily tell, even if Pino's sudden amused warbling didn't tip him off.

"What's so funny?" Izuku bit out, even as the anger began to lose its edge, gradually morphing into an embarrassed flush.

"I— no, I'm sorry, it's just—"

"What?!"

"Just— I—" Still trying hard to fight back laughter, but coming dangerously close to failing each time he opened his mouth, Rody pointed to his phone in Izuku's hand. "You should— Feel free to look at those pictures of Connie that my friend just sent."

"I'm not interested in seeing the woman you wanted to cheat on me with!"

Apparently that was the last straw for Rody's resolve, as he promptly broke down laughing. Izuku could feel his face turning redder by the moment.

"This isn't funny...!"

"No, I mean—" Rody fought to keep his laughter under control. "I'm sorry, just— Izuku, love, just look at the pictures and you'll get it."

Frowning, and with his ears burning with humiliation, Izuku lifted the phone and tapped in Rody's passcode. Careful of the glass splinters from the screen protector that he must have also broken by accident, Izuku navigated to the attached photographs on the most recent text messages—

Izuku's eyebrows drew together. "Wha— This is—" He was interrupted by Rody laughing even harder. "Can you quit that please?!"

"I'm sorry, your face is just—"

Anger quickly being eclipsed by mere annoyance, Izuku turned the phone around towards Rody and tapped the screen in disbelief. "You're telling me this 'Connie' person is an airplane?!"

Rody gave another quick burst of laughter. "Did I ever say that she wasn't?!"

Izuku's grip on the phone tightened again, this time out of embarrassment, and he stared down at the screen with an indignant pout. "So all of that... I got so upset, so angry over... an airplane?"

"A Lockheed Constellation, to be precise," Rody clarified, his laughter having calmed to a snicker, and he draped an arm across Izuku's shoulder to gaze at the phone as well. "Connie for short. Gorgeous plane, huh?"

Izuku frowned, burning humiliation spreading all the way to the base of his neck. If it was something important to Rody, though, he wanted to understand, so he scrolled between the three photographs that had been sent to the conversation. Gorgeous... He wasn't sure about that. To Izuku it looked like any other airplane, except that there were three fins on the tail instead of just a single one, it sported propellers instead of more modern turbines, and he supposed the shape of the fuselage looked a little different from usual, too. "Well, it looks... different, for sure."

"You got that right. A veritable beauty queen of 1940s aviation." Rody plucked his phone out of Izuku's fingers, which had relaxed now that the misunderstanding was cleared up. "They don't make anything quite like her anymore, and there aren't many left, either. This one's one of the few survivors, and not even technically airworthy without my friend's quirk activated. He was at our wedding, remember? The one who can temporarily fix mechanical issues?"

"Ah, right." Izuku did remember meeting that pilot, mostly because he later jotted down about half a page on the guy's quirk. He supposed that would grant him opportunities to see rare machines in need of repair. "So that... wasn't innuendo? When you were saying you wanted to 'take her for a ride.'"

Rody chuckled low in his throat. "Completely literal, babe. Except the part about being willing to kill for the chance." He paused. "Well, on second thought..."

"Rody."

"I'm kidding." Rody stood up straight again, placing a quick kiss to Izuku's temple before pulling away. "Sorry for making you upset, though. I'd never cheat on you."

"Yeah... I know." Izuku took a half-step back, gaze glued to his own feet. Embarrassed as he was that he had jumped to such a ridiculous conclusion, that he had essentially been jealous of an airplane, and that Rody had (rightfully) laughed at him for it, he couldn't bring himself to look his husband in the eye. "Uhh... Right, the dishes—"

"Hold on," Rody said, grabbing Izuku's wrist as he turned back towards the kitchen and pulling him in again. "We've cleared up the misunderstanding, so what's the problem now? Embarrassed?"

Izuku didn't fight the embrace but, still wanting to avoid eye contact, he opted to hide his face against Rody's shoulder. "So what if I am? I feel stupid. I accused you of cheating on me with a plane..."

"Nah, it's not a big deal." Rody laid a hand on Izuku's head as Pino settled in his curls with an affectionate coo. "If anything, I'd say it was pretty cute."

"Not really helping..." He sighed, idly plucking at Rody's sleeve with one hand, and chanced a furtive look at his face. "But... you really think that plane is sexy?"

"Did I say that? Hmm... Well, if I did, then far be it from me to argue with myself..."

Izuku grumbled. "Maybe you'd even prefer it if I was an airplane, then."

Humming in mock consideration, Rody used his other hand to lift Izuku's palm and stroke a gentle thumb across the red pinpoints of broken capillaries dotting the skin there. "Maybe an aluminum hull would help, at least. I don't care about the broken phone case, but don't go hurting yourself too, love."

The barest hint of a smile finally began to tease the edges of Izuku's lips, and he readjusted his hand to be flush against Rody's palm, their fingers entwining. "You're talking sweet now, but I'm not sure I've completely forgiven you yet for ogling a plane over me."

"Now when did I ever say I'd choose the plane over you?" Rody squeezed his hand in return. "But fine. What will it take to earn your forgiveness? Wanna punish me, Hero?"

Izuku bit back a laugh. "A punishment? Maybe I will."

"I look forward to it."

"Jeez...!"

Notes: The aviation documentary I watched the other day said (paraphrasing), "any pilot would think that the Connie is the sexiest airplane ever designed," and I immediately knew what I had to do.

Thank you to the Flying magazine, TWA Hotel, and Connie Survivors websites for helping me try to figure out why this particular airplane is so "sexy." I'm still as clueless as Deku about it, but I tried to understand, and that's all that matters.