Shout out to Disney and Square Enix for making this fantasmic game series, the How It Should Have Ended crew for the hilarious and awesome videos that I am homaging here, and Spiderfan626 for the chain of fanfiction stories with this premise, from which the bulk of my inspiration came from. I hope you enjoy and get a good laugh.
If you haven't already, please be sure to check out my previous installments in this series, "How Kingdom Hearts Should Have Ended", "How Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories Should Have Ended", "How Kingdom Hearts II Should Have Ended", and "How Kingdom Hearts: 358/2 Days Should Have Ended".
Master Eraqus and Master Xehanort are holding Terra and Aqua's Mark of Mastery exam. The light orbs were suddenly corrupted by darkness, and Terra, Aqua and Ventus promptly destroyed them.
Eraqus: That was unexpected. But one must keep a still heart even in the most trying of circumstances. You both performed commendably. However, before we can proceed with the next part of the examination, I feel that we need to investigate how this could have happened.
Terra: Is anyone here beside us?
Aqua: Not that I know of.
Eraqus: Xehanort, you use darkness quite liberally. Might you know anything about how this happened?
Xehanort shifts about and stammers nervously, unsure of how to cover this one up.
HOW KINGDOM HEARTS: BIRTH BY SLEEP SHOULD HAVE ENDED
Terra, Aqua and Ventus have just met up at the Keyblade Graveyard.
Aqua: You're [Ven] here too?
Ventus: Xehanort wants me and Vanitas to fight and make some kind of "c-blade".
Terra: Xehanort told me to come here, saying that he would destroy you both.
Aqua: Well, we're together now and we're safe for the moment. I suggest that we leave, quickly.
Terra: Good idea.
They don their Keyblade armors and fly into the sky on their Keyblade Gliders. Master Xehanort and Vanitas begin their approach two seconds later.
Xehanort: What? Where are they? They should be here.
FFWD
Master Xehanort and Vanitas stand across from Terra, Ventus and Aqua.
Xehanort: Behold. These lifeless keys used to be full of power, united with the hearts of their masters.
Ventus: Can you hear him?
Aqua: No. He's too far away.
Terra: I don't really care. Warp!
Terra casts Warp, causing Master Xehanort to instantly and unceremoniously vanish into a rift that seals up, much to Vanitas' confusion.
FFWD
Vanitas jumps off of the cliff to attack Aqua. Terra runs after him. Master Xehanort teleports in front of him to block his path. Rather than stop, Terra holds his Keyblade and points it forward. Master Xehanort only has a second to realize what is going to happen before Terra charges into him, impaling him through the heart with the Keyblade and running straight off of the cliff with him.
Xehanort: I immediately regret my decisioooooooon!
BUT THIS IS HOW IT REALLY SHOULD HAVE ENDED
Terra, Ventus and Aqua have just defeated the Trinity Armor in Radiant Garden.
Terra: We have a dangerous task ahead of us. I don't want you to get hurt.
Aqua: And what is this dangerous task, Terra? It doesn't sound like what the Master told you to do.
Terra: It might be a different route, but I'm fighting the darkness.
Aqua: I'm not so sure. I've been to the same worlds as you, and I've seen what you've done. You shouldn't put yourself so close to the darkness.
Ventus: Listen to yourself, Aqua. Terra would never—
Terra: You mean Princess Aurora? You're right. I was weak and let an evil fairy put me under her control with a spell so I would steal the princess' heart for her. [Still Frame flashback to Maleficent using her sleep spell on Terra]
Ventus: I knew that witch was lying!
Aqua: I'm sorry I doubted you.
Ventus: Then that old lady was definitely lying too, right?
Terra: What old lady?
Ventus: I ran into an old lady with a basket of apples in Dwarf Woodlands. She said that you threatened her for information on Master Xehanort. [Still Frame flashback to Ven giving the apple back to the old hag]
Terra: I didn't see any old lady. The only people I met on that world were Snow White and the queen. The queen had a magic mirror, and she said she would let me ask it about Master Xehanort if I killed Snow White for her, but I refused. [Still Frame flashback to The Evil Queen giving the heart box to Terra]
Aqua: The queen? The dwarfs said that she disguised herself as a beggar woman and put Snow White in a sleeping curse with a poisoned apple. [Seeing Ven and Terra's horrified expressions] But a prince woke her up with a kiss. [Still Frame flashbacks to both the dwarfs' funeral for the apparently dead Snow White and then to The Prince carrying her in his arms]
Ventus: That explains it.
Terra: So, you said you ran into the boy in the mask?
Ventus: Yeah. He showed up in my room and told me to hurry or I'll never see you again, that you'd be a different person. Then we got into a fight in a desert. How did you know his name?
Terra: Master Xehanort told me about him. He said that he created Vanitas from the darkness in your heart after you were hurt in an accident. I also found out that Vanitas was in control of the Unversed.
Aqua: What?!
Ventus: Master Xehanort… Oh! That reminds me. You guys should see this.
Ventus pulls out Xehanort's letter to Eraqus and shows it to Terra and Aqua.
Aqua: Where did you get this?
Flashback to Ven arriving in Dwarf Woodlands and noticing the paper fall from his person. He wonders how it got there, then he notices a piece of Scotch tape attached to the paper and turns it over to see that the back reads "KICK ME". Hiding behind a rock, Vanitas snickers. Cut back to the present.
Terra: Master Eraqus was going to name us both Masters without an exam?
Aqua: Then Master Xehanort convinced him otherwise and pointed out the darkness he saw within you. Then those light orbs were suddenly corrupted by darkness.
Ventus: We really should have looked into that.
Aqua: And Maleficent said that she had spoken with Master Xehanort, but she never said what he told her.
Terra: I'd pieced that together as well.
Aqua: What could this all mean? Is it possible that maybe…
Ventus: Master Xehanort is evil?
…
Aqua: That kind of makes sense.
Terra: I can't believe I believed him.
Aqua: To be fair, the Master did trust him.
Terra: Should we tell him?
Aqua: I think that's a good idea.
They fly back to The Land of Departure together and explain their findings.
Eraqus: I should have known. He was obsessed with understanding the Keyblade War. He even blasted me with darkness when I argued with him about his intentions.
Terra: So you invited him to our graduation?
Eraqus: I suppose that explains the corrupted light orbs incident.
Aqua: So what should we do now?
Cut to them in the Mysterious Tower along with Master Yen Sid, Donald, and Goofy.
Yen Sid: As I feared. Xehanort has indeed gone astray.
Eraqus: Xehanort intends to use Ventus and Vanitas to forge the c-blade. I'm not quite sure how Terra fits in yet, but it can't be anything good.
Aqua: We have to stop him.
Yen Sid: Patience. We are not yet ready.
The Star Shard brings Mickey to the study.
Yen Sid: Okay. Now we are ready.
Mickey: Ready for what?
Yet another offscreen explanation later, cut to the Keyblade Graveyard where Master Xehanort and Vanitas have convened.
Vanitas: Shouldn't you be tied up with that surfer guy?
Xehanort: Terra never showed up, so I got bored and left. I expected a falling-out between him and the other apprentices. I wonder what happened.
Terra: Looking for us, Master Xehanort?
Master Xehanort and Vanitas turn to see Terra, Ventus, Aqua, Master Eraqus, Mickey, Donald, and Goofy, all of their weapons at the ready. Terra, Ventus, Aqua, and Eraqus activate their Keyblade Armor.
Xehanort: This isn't good.
Cut to the Wayfinder trio at the Superhero Café with Superman and Batman.
Aqua: So we defeated Master Xehanort and Vanitas—Terra finishing the job on the masked boy so that the c-blade wouldn't be forged—and eliminated all of the remaining Unversed.
Terra: Master Eraqus said he was willing to reevaluate my worthiness of the Mark of Mastery, but I realized that I need to figure out the balance of light and darkness in my heart so that it can't be exploited.
Superman: See, Batman? That right there is the value of communicating.
Batman: Hey! I'm great at communicating!
Superman: Oh, really?
Batman: [leans in toward Aqua] Hey. I'm Batman. You wanna know my secret identity?
Aqua: I sense great darkness within you.
She summons her Keyblade, causing Batman to back off.
Batman: Okay! Jeez!
Waiter: Miss, would you please put your weapon away?
Aqua: My apologies. [Dismisses her Keyblade]
Superman: You should probably work on your whole "Destroy all darkness" thing.
Aqua: What do you mean?
Batman: Well, everyone has darkness in their hearts. Terra has a lot of it, for example. It all depends on how you use it. Like, Xehanort and Maleficent used the darkness to hurt and manipulate people. But I use the darkness to scare and fight criminals to protect the innocent. I'm the Dark Knight, but I don't let darkness corrupt me, and I stay on the right side of the line. Because I'm Batman.
Terra: That's very wise. Maybe I could take a note from that.
Batman: I don't see why not. You already look a lot like me in your armor.
Ventus: You really do.
Superman: So, what's next for you?
Ventus: Well, since Master Xehanort and Vanitas were defeated, Master Eraqus is willing to let me explore the worlds.
Aqua: With my or Terra's supervision, of course.
Superman: Well, it looks like the future's looking bright for this generation of Keyblade wielders.
Meanwhile, at the Villain Pub, Master Xehanort and Vanitas sulk at the bar. Palpatine uses the Force to refill Xehanort's drink.
Palpatine: But how could my plan possibly have failed? Gain the boy's trust, let him grow distant from his teacher and companions, and lead him to the Dark Side. It was too simple to fail!
Xehanort: He and his friends talked about their issues like sensible people.
Palpatine: I see. So, does this mean you don't want me to use your "body-hijacking" plan?
Xehanort: No, go on ahead. I'm sure it will work out.
THE END