Blaine was lost to his own thoughts as well, playing a game with himself, questioning how delighted and over the moon he should be inside and how much of it he could safely let out without scaring Kurt away.
I cannot believe this. I had the biggest crush on Kurt in high school. I mean, what gay guy wouldn't? He was sexy as hell up on that stage, and his voice was to die for, so clear and beautiful. I could have watched him all day. I spent my entire eighth grade year being so thankful that that show came out in October. I had most of the year to watch him and obsess over him. Well, "obsess" is a weird word. So is "watch," I guess. I just couldn't get enough of him.
I would see him sitting on the floor of the hallways with that notebook in his lap, furiously scribbling between classes and over the lunch hour. He was always writing something. I wonder what came of that, why he's doing photography for my dad and not writing. He should have my job. I just thought he was so cute back then. I was jealous that someone was going to get to take him to prom that year, and then I was overjoyed when I went to that restaurant with Sam on the night of prom and he was in there, eating with his dad, not dressed for prom in the slightest. I dreamed about him that night.
I wonder why he's back here. I know I heard that he left that year, got out of Lima. So, besides his dad, why is he back? I should ask. But what if it's a sore subject? What if he doesn't want to talk about it? The last thing I want is for him to quit, not when my dad so clearly needs him. This is my chance to get to know him. Who knew I'd have that option all these years later? I don't want to risk us never getting to know one another. I think I need to keep my elation on the down-low for now. It'll be hard, but I'll just have to stick it out.