Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from the Inuyasha universe. The rest is mine.

"Putt putt is just as good as bowling," Souta reassured everyone as they left the bowling alley, all the lanes already taken.

"You sure kid?" Inuyasha pressed. "We could come back later or another day."

Souta shot him a look to say that he didn't think they'd make it to another outing. When Inuyasha returned to the Higurashis, Kagome radiated with irritation and jealousy. She wouldn't look at him the whole way to the diner, and hardly spoke more than a few words to him.

Guess it was different knowing he was dating, and seeing him kiss someone else while sober.

God it was so damn satisfying seeing her upset over this. Even though she had no damn right to be upset…and they both knew it.

"Nonsense, we're all here now…and Souta graduated today. We should do something as a family today," Mrs. Higurashi insisted, rubbing his arm. Hearing her call him family, even though he would never really be family, was nice. It warmed his heart.

He glanced over to Kagome and noticed that she was pointedly looking anywhere but at him.

"I guess we're heading to putt putt then," he replied, keeping his eyes on Kagome. "Shouldn't take too long anyways," he continued, trying to reassure her, and that made her look up at him, glaring.

"Do you have some exciting plans tonight you're looking forward to?"

"Not that the moment…but that could always change."

She was practically bristling. Fuck he loved it! He loved knowing that she was jealous of Kikyo. It made him feel like there was a part of her that wished she had never ended things. That she still wanted him. Even if she didn't.

Even if…even if he didn't.

Because he didn't still want her. Not really. Not like that. Not in his life…But…they needed to talk about it. She couldn't keep acting this way - it wasn't fair to Souta.

"Why don't you two go on in," Inuyasha encouraged when they got they had made their way to the indoor, space themed putt putt establishment. "We will catch up in a second," he reassured Souta and Mrs. Higurashi, grabbing Kagome's hand and pulling her around to the side of the building, away from prying eyes and ears.

"Inuyasha, what are you doing," she hissed, and he just smirked back at her.

"You're jealous," he stated, practically preening.

"What?" she replied, blinking hard as if she had misheard him.

"You. Are. Jealous," he repeated, and she furrowed her brow in confusion.

"What are you talking about? Jealous of what?"

"Kikyo."

"Why would I be jealous of her?"

"Because I kissed her," he replied, shooting her a knowing look before sighing. "I thought we talked about this…"

"We did. And I'm not. I'm happy for you. You seem happy with her," she whispered and he blinked hard. This wasn't what he was expecting. Her words were going against everything his nose and eyes had been telling him.

"I…am." He thought he was, at least…It was hard to say. He wasn't sure he really knew what happy meant anymore. He had been happy with Kagome…but he had never felt that way again. Was it even happiness? Did he even know what that felt like anymore?

"Good," she smiled weakly, cupping his cheek. "That's all I've ever wanted for you."

"I…"

He didn't know how he felt about that. Her jealousy he enjoyed. He knew how to process that. This…this he didn't know what to do with. He took a subtle, tentative sniff and was baffled when he couldn't detect any trace of her lying to him.

What had she been jealous about then?

"Why?"

She raised both of her eyebrows at his question, clearly surprised.

"What do you mean why?"

"Why do you want me to be happy? You haven't wanted to see me in seven years. Why do you care if I'm happy or not?"

She snatched her hand away from him, looking like he had just slapped her.

"I…" she began, swallowing hard. "I thought I was doing the right thing. For both of us. At first it was just…the thought of seeing you again hurt. Everything was too raw…What I did to you," she shook her head, unable to look him in the eyes. "Then too much time had passed, and I didn't know what I would say to you even if I did see you. I didn't know if there was anything left to say…and I thought I would just be hurting both of us again."

"And you wouldn't have seen me this time if your car hadn't broken down."

"Not intentionally…No…But that doesn't mean that I don't care about your happiness Inuyasha," she insisted, her voice firm. "I'll always care about you, and I'll always want you to be happy."

"You shouldn't have left then."

She looked away from him, unable to meet his eyes.

"You know I had to…"

"You didn't though! You didn't need that fancy ass degree to do what you're doing. You could have done it all from here! We have a damn paper, don't we?"

"That's part of the problem, Inuyasha…you never could see beyond this little town."

"And that's bad how?"

"There's more out there than this! And I needed to see it before I settled down to become Mrs. Takahashi, and Papa and Gramps…" she trailed off, shaking her head, sighing. "Why is it so hard to believe that I still care about you? Maybe we don't have what we used to have, but I still care about you, Inuyasha. You still mean the world to me. You're the love of my life."

His eyes scanned her face - his breath catching in his throat.

You're.

You. Are.

Are. Not were. Not past tense.

No. That's fucking present tense.

He didn't think she meant to say that. It probably wasn't even true…But…That didn't keep his heart from betraying him and aching and wishing it were.

How fucking pathetic was that?

He closed his eyes, sighing.

He wasn't doing this again…and he wasn't going to pretend that it was a possibility to reclaim what they had.

"Ok," he whispered. "You too, you know."

"Me too what?"

"The love of my life, Kagome. You always were."

Putt putt had been going well enough so far. After their little chat, they rejoined her mother and brother, grabbing their putters and balls. Kagome volunteered to keep score, and no one was going to fight her for it.

Souta did remarkably well, getting the ball into the hole on par or under par almost every time. Mrs. Higurashi took her time, trying to make each move count, whereas Kagome was all over the place, almost as if she was intentionally trying to lose. He on the other hand, was failing miserably because she was constantly distracting him.

Not intentionally…but she was. She was all smiles and sparkling eyes and sweet melodic laughter and it was…it was just fucking distracting as shit, ok?

All it meant was that as they started the final hole, Souta was probably going to win…even though it was a hard last hole. You had to somehow maneuver your ball through an asteroid field before sinking it into a "black hole" on top of a small hill.

The kid made it in at par, and he swore that Souta had been here more than a few times to have succeeded so easily. During his turn however, he heard Mrs. Higurashi whisper to her daughter that the owner of the establishment, Hojo, had been staring at her since they had arrived. Hojo had moved here a few years back, for reasons he honestly didn't give a shit about.

"You should talk to him before we leave," she whispered to her daughter as Inuyasha began to line himself up, doing a few test swings with his putter. "Maybe give him your number?"

He didn't mean to do it. He really hadn't…but before he could find his self-control, he was seeing red and he had slammed his putter into the ball, sending it hurtling across the course and lodging itself in the wall.

"Inuyasha?" Kagome gasped, her eyes wide as he dropped the putter.

All he could do was blink in response as what he had done slowly sank in.

Oh…Oh shit…Oh fuck!

"Inuyasha, what the hell!" she snapped, and he nervously turned to face her, her tone already making him defensive. "It's called Putt Putt for a reason! You're supposed to tap it not hit it to the damn moon!"

"First of all, the moon is back that way," he began, pointing in the opposite direction of where he had hit the ball, towards the moon themed hole. "Second, I don't know what you're talking about - that was me tapping it, woman!" he continued indignantly, trying to fight off the blush staining his cheeks from embarrassment.

"The hole in the wall would disagree! Apparently you wouldn't know how to tap something if your life depended on it!"

"Yeah? Well I did a great job up until now, didn't I?"

"Hardly! Your record begs to differ," she scoffed, shaking the scorecard.

"My 'record' is fine! It's no worse than yours!"

"Ha! I'm definitely doing better than you, buddy," she countered as Souta's snickers slowly gained volume until he was doubled over, howling. The pair turned to look at him, as Mrs. Higurashi covered her mouth with her hands, completely mortified by the duo. It was only then that they realized that everyone there had stopped to stare at them. Everyone in the whole town would hear about this before dinner.

Perfect. Just fucking perfect.

He blamed Hojo. Fucker just couldn't keep his eyes to himself, could he?

"Do you two even realize what you're saying?" the older woman whispered, frazzled, and the pair blinked hard before realization slowly washed over them. Kagome slowly turned bright red while he just stood there and smirked.

He hadn't, but he did now…and his "record" wasn't half bad.

"I think we should call this a day," Kagome groaned, rubbing her temples, and everyone agreed, returning their gear to the front desk where he apologized and promised to come back the next day and fix the damage.

Just because he didn't like Hojo didn't mean he wasn't a little remorseful for what he had done. He was pretty sure his mother would make him anyways.

As they were leaving, he couldn't help himself, however.

"You know Kagome, I've never had any complaints about my tapping skills…"

"Yeah? Well there's a first for everything."

He was almost afraid he'd have to carry Souta to the car.

He did walk with them back to where they parked, but declined their earlier invitation to drop him off at the auto shop to pick up the sedan.

"I think I'm just gonna walk. It's nice out," he reassured them, giving Souta a hug before whispering into his ear that he had hidden a case of beer in the stable for him. The boy immediately hugged him that much harder, voicing his thanks and his promise to be careful sneaking it out. No one wanted to get in trouble with their respective mothers…but it was tradition to go with your friend group into the woods and drink yourself stupid the night of graduation. He didn't want Souta to have to mooch off of others, and he would have plenty to share with a case. Maybe even a few leftover?

Eh. Who was he kidding.

It wouldn't make it to sunrise.

He had gotten so shitfaced with Kagome the day they graduated…He hoped Souta wouldn't do anything as stupid as them. After they left their friends, he and Kagome had gone to the cliffs drunk off their asses and he stripped down to their underwear. He picked her up, and ran as fast as he could, jumping off the edge and diving into the lake below.

It had been exhilarating…and incredibly stupid. They could have died, but when you're drunk off your ass…

That night had been amazing though. When they resurfaced, letting out hollers and whoops of joy, he remembered taking her face between his hands and kissing her deeply. Passionately. To the point where they both struggled to breathe.

Their hands glided over their skin…heat radiating off of their palms as they explored the familiar terrain of their partner. He remembered her legs wrapping around his hips, pulling him a bit further down into the water, and his ears folded down flat, trying to stay dry. Eventually, under the light of the moon, they decided to return to shore. He could still vividly remember her rising out of the water like some damn Goddess. Her black hair curled around her shoulders in long tendrils. Her white, lacy undergarments left nothing to the imagination, and he remembered watching the sway of her hips as she, somehow, gracefully rose from the water and walked onto the shore.

He stared at her for a moment when she turned around. Her nipples had pebbled into hard peaks, and he remembered watching a bead of water roll down from her shoulder to the valley between her breasts…and another from the hem of her bra down the planes of her stomach to the top of her panties. He could distinctly see the shape of her sex through the soaked white fabric…and that was all it took before he was on her, pulling her down.

Their mouths were hot, their tongues battling each other. Their teeth scraping against their flesh. His hands pulled her breasts free from the confines of her wet bra so he could taste her wet skin. His fang drew delicate circles around her hardened tips, his tongue quickly soothing its path. Her hands slipped below the waistband of his underwear to tug his hardened length as his fingers pulled the crotch of hers to the side to find her bundle of nerves. They groaned together in need, their hands working together in unison. He peppered kisses and nips across her chest as their hands continued to pull each other closer and closer to the nirvana he so desperately wanted them to achieve, but it wasn't enough. He stopped her, whimpering into the crook of her neck how he desperately wanted more than this. He wanted more than her hand or her mouth.

He wanted her. Wanted to be one with her…had asked her if she were ready to go further…and to this day he swore she was going to say yes when he heard the irate sound of his brother yelling at him.

Fuck that hadn't been fun.

He dove down on top of Kagome to give her a chance to try and shrug back into her bra as Sesshomaru loomed closer. He yelled about how bad it reeked, and responsibility, and asked them what the hell they were thinking, and berated them about staying out so damn late (it was almost four in the goddamn morning!), and how he was being an irresponsible little prick! His mother was back home, worried sick out of her mind, and had sent both him and his father to go look for him.

Yeah…that night had landed him in a world of trouble.

Somehow he doubted Souta would be as foolish though.

When he let go of Souta, he hugged Mrs. Higurashi, thanking her for her including him in all of the fun, and he parted by telling her he'd see her the next day, bright and early, as usual.

That left Kagome…

He was at a loss. Did he hug her? Shake her hand?

What?

"Inuyasha…can I talk to you for a second before you go?"

"Yeah…" he replied awkwardly, letting her take his hand and pull him away from her family and over a few cars.

He felt apprehension pull in the pit of his stomach when she decided they were far enough away, stopping to look him in the eye. He watched her fists clench and unclench at her sides as she seemed to try and figure out what the hell she wanted to tell him.

"Inuyasha," she finally began, "I wanted to tell you this at some point today, but I never really found a good opportunity for it. I…do you remember how I told you I was asking my boss if I could work from here for a while?"

"Yeah," he nodded, crossing his arms over his chest in an attempt to ignore the twisting in the pit of his stomach.

"Well…I can stay for three months. Provided I can keep up with my workload from them. Summer is the slow season with double issues and…"

…and he stopped paying attention as she continued to ramble. She was staying? Or at least coming back for a little bit? He knew he could handle a few weeks, but three months?

Where the hell did she work that would let her stay here for three months? In a different time zone no less! He felt lightheaded. Were his ears ringing? He thought his ears might have been ringing.

"…so I wanted to know if we should work out a schedule or something? If you wanted to avoid seeing me? I know you start in the morning - what time do you normally leave? Inuyasha? Are you listening to me?"

"Um…yeah," he breathed sighing, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Whatever you want."

"That's not what I'm asking, Inuyasha," she smiled weakly. "What do you want to do?"

She was leaving the decision completely up to him, huh? Letting him decide if he wanted to see her, or pretend she didn't exist?

Well…she hadn't existed for the last seven years. And they were barely civil as it was.

"I leave sometime around ten."

"Ok then," she nodded. "So…I guess unless I run into you as you're leaving, this is…This is goodbye?"

"Yeah…I think so," he replied slowly, disliking the bitter taste in his mouth - the awkwardness of the words felt coming off of his tongue.

"Ok then…" she repeated, not sure what to do with herself now, but he saw the look in her eyes. He knew she wanted to say something, but was holding herself back.

"What is it, Kagome," he gently prodded, and a lite blush dusted her cheeks. "What do you want to say?"

"I…Nothing, really. I just…" she sighed, pushing her hair behind her ears as she looked down at their feet before finally gaining the will to say what was on her mind. "I really am happy for you, you know. With Kikyo. Happy that you're happy. I really do want that for you, and even though she was never my favorite person—"

"—Why didn't you like Kikyo?" he interrupted, and her brows rose in surprise.

"…Really?"

"Yeah. I mean, I never paid her much mind, but you…You never liked her. Could never figure it out."

"Because she was always trying to take you away from me," she smiled wryly.

"Huh?" he blinked. "I mean…I remember one time she tried to kiss me—"

"—She what?"

"Oh come on…" he sighed. Why couldn't they leave things on at least somewhat amicable terms? "Kagome, it was years ago and we ain't together anymore…"

"Oh I know," she ground out. "But why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I freaked out on her and she told me she wasn't and…Why does this even matter now?"

"You're right. It doesn't. She won in the end anyways, it would seem."

He knew it! She was jealous! She still wanted him!

Wait…He couldn't…No - she didn't. She was just acting this way because of their past. It was nothing more than a knee jerk reaction. Still…his felt his heart begging to believe it and for him to make it better somehow.

He subtly sniffed the air and looked around, and when he was sure no one else was there, he hooked a finger under her chin, tilting her face up as he leaned down to press another last kiss to her lips. It was sweet and chaste and lingering…and it made his heart ache that much more.

God this had been a mistake…It felt like every time he saw her, he was kissing her goodbye. Even if that wasn't true. Two out of three times wasn't a good record.

Fuck! What the hell was wrong with him?

Why couldn't he…Why was he acting like this?

Kissing Kikyo, kissing Kagome…This wasn't like him. He felt his mind and his heart fighting for control over his body and it left him doing stupid shit like this.

Why was he constantly needing to remind himself that he was over her? That she meant nothing to him anymore?

When he pulled away from her, he could smell the sadness and confusion in her sent as well as he could see it on her face.

"There. Now you're even," he explained, and she chuckled bitterly, crossing her arms over her chest as she looked away from him.

"Yeah…I guess we are."

"Yeah," he agreed, not sure what to do with the ache in his chest now. Guess it was a good thing he was walking. Some time and some air would do him some good. "You take care, Higurashi," he smiled weakly, and she looked back up at him and took his hand, giving it a light squeeze.

"You too, Inuyasha."

A/N:

Putt putt was my sad attempt at humor and inspired by and written for Clearwillow just like the rest of this damn story because it's an ode to Carra…let's be real guys. Let's just call it what it is and own this…