Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from the Inuyasha universe or any of the popular name brand apps, products, services, etc. The rest is mine.
Chapter 11
Kagome's grip on the steering wheel tightened and relaxed as she stared out at the ranch house in front of her. Was this crazy? Coming here? Wanting to spend tonight with him? Be by his side?
He had told her she should come...
Now that she was here, she was terrified and questioning everything. Maybe this had all been a giant mistake. She missed him so much though...but she just knew that they would be delving into old wounds tonight.
Knowing you were walking into that was...hard.
She took a deep calming breath and remembered what her therapist had told her earlier that day when Kagome had called her. She needed to do this. If nothing else, it would bring her closure - something she had been sorely missing. Inuyasha had been thrown back into her life, for better or for worse, and it was time she faced her past.
She leaned over and grabbed the six pack from the foot of the passenger's seat and got out, gently closing the door of her rental. The sun was just about to set - his transformation would be happening any minute now, and she wanted to be with him when it did.
As she slowly approached the quaint, white house, she could hear two voices yelling within. She couldn't quite make out the words, but she could tell that one was Izayoi. The other was a bit harder to identify, but if she had to guess, she would put her money on it belonging to Inuyasha. She had heard his mother use that tone with him once before when he had run away as a kid. The time he had walked through the creek to their house because he didn't want to do chores.
His parents had been furious...but his mother? She had really lit into him. She hadn't been able to see him for two and a half whole weeks after that. It had been the longest they had ever spent apart. Until...until now.
Whatever had happened tonight...it wasn't good.
She was just beginning to debate if she should knock, turn tail, or awkwardly wait around when the front door swung open and a very irate and flushed Inuyasha pushed past the storm door. His footsteps were heavy as he pounded down the steps and strode over to her, a snarl on his face. He took her arm and started guiding her away from the house and she looked at him before glancing over her shoulder.
Izayoi appeared in the doorway behind him, looking just as angry.
"Inuyasha! Inuyasha get back here! We weren't done yet!"
"I think we were Ma!" he snapped, pausing and whirling around on his mother, a fang poking out of the corner of his mouth. She felt his grasp tighten on her arm and she hissed at the surprising amount of pressure. His ear swiveled back on her and he loosened his grip, mumbling out an apology. "I love you Ma, but...I gotta. I just...I gotta," he reiterated, his tone softening. "I'll see ya later, ok?"
Izayoi looked like she was about to argue with him, but Toga came into view and placed his hands on her shoulders. She turned her head around to regard him with pained eyes, and he shot his wife an understanding look. Izayoi spun in her husband's arms, allowing him to pull her into a warm, comforting embrace before shifting his eyes to his son. They were solemn and worried, but Toga nodded and that was all Inuyasha seemed to need. He returned his father's gesture before pulling more gently on Kagome's arm, guiding her away from his house and around to the stable.
"Inuyasha?" she asked hesitantly, unsure of what he was planning.
"Thought we should go someplace we can't be overheard," he explained roughly. "I thought we could go to our spot at the cliffs. How does one last ride sound?"
Like she didn't want it to be the last one.
"Sounds like a good idea."
He nodded, acknowledging that he heard her, as he brought her into the stable and started saddling Bessie. It was then that his transformation overcame him, and she watched as his hair lost its brilliant silvery luster and became a dark, midnight black. She watched as his claws faded away into round, blunted tips. She watched as his ears disappeared from the top of his head to reappear on the sides of his face. She watched as he paused in work, placing a hand on Bessie's neck, his fingers twitching.
"Inuyasha," she called, tentatively touching his shoulder. She knew he hated his transformation. He had once described it as someone taking his head and dunking it into a bucket of water. His senses were dulled and he felt like he couldn't breathe until the sun rose the next day.
"I'm fine," he snapped, his tawny eyes filled with annoyance and she flinched, pulling back as if he had burnt her. "Kagome…" he sighed, reaching back for her hand and shooting her an apologetic look. "I'm sorry. I...let's start over, ok?"
She could only nod and give his hand a gentle squeeze as he gave her a small smile.
"I know you want to, but I...I don't wanna talk about it, can we just leave it at that?"
"Yeah. Sure," she smiled weakly, and he returned to his work. Once he was finished he glanced down at the beers Kagome held and gave her a wry smile.
"Beer?"
"Thought we could use it," she smiled sheepishly, causing him to chuckle dryly.
"Probably," he agreed, taking it from her when she offered it. He ripped into the cardboard and placed three beers into the saddle bag on either side of Bessie before offering her a hand. She nervously accepted it, allowing him to help her up before climbing on behind her and taking the reins.
His hand landed on her waist and she ignored the way her body practically sung at his touch. She tried to at least. It felt good, his hand...the way it held her firmly, pressing her back to his chest. The way it kept her in place.
It...it felt right being in his arms. Even if it was only for a few minutes. She leaned back into him as he began trotting Bessie out of the stable and she felt him stiffen for a second and she quickly apologized.
"It's fine," he weakly reassured her, his posture relaxing slightly as he pulled her closer. Their bodies fit together perfectly. She could feel the heat of him against her back, the thin cotton of his button down and her t-shirt doing nothing to prevent her from noticing it.
When they had been dating, she used to joke that they had been made for each other. That was how perfectly their bodies and melded together. Now, it was just yet another reminder of how horribly things had gone wrong.
They were silent as they made their way to the cliffs, each lost in their own thoughts. Kagome couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking about. Was he regretting this? Did he think this was a mistake? She hoped he didn't...and that this wasn't.
She took a deep, calming breath and she felt Inuyasha's hand twitch on her. He felt that. Probably heard it too, over the sound of Bessie's hooves.
"Are you ok," he asked gently, craning his neck to try and get a better look at her.
"Yeah," she breathed shakily, turning around to give him a nervous smile. "It's just...the last time we were out here, things didn't go so well…"
She regretted it as soon as she said it. She was sure he was already thinking about it...but his eyes darkened and his jaw twitched.
"No...they didn't," he agreed coldly as their spot came into view.
It was as beautiful as she remembered it. The cliffs towering over the still, glassy water of the lake. The field of wildflowers dotting the grass with specs of vibrant colors, visible even in the darkness. The small fire pit they had built years ago still stood, looking rather well maintained, and he had gathered enough firewood to last several nights. The only thing new was the log they used as a bench. She assumed the old one had rotted away long ago. Perhaps turned into firewood for the pit?
That thought gave her pause. The pit did look well maintained. And there was a new log to sit on. Did he come out here frequently?
He dismounted from Bessie, drawing her attention from her thoughts as he held out a hand to help her down. She accepted it swinging a leg over the mare's back to step down. Inuyasha silently led Bessie to the post he had installed to keep Suzzie from wandering off and secured her reins to it. She busied herself with removing the beers, trying to distract herself from the sudden anxiety she felt in the pit in her stomach.
It wasn't helping. She felt like a mess.
Inuyasha bent down to pick up a red backpack she hadn't noticed in the darkness before, swinging one arm through a strap. He turned to regard her, raising a brow to silently ask her if she was ready. She quickly moved to his side, allowing him to lead her over to the pit.
"The clearing looks good," she commented as he put the bag down, opening it.
"Good," he nodded, lighting a match. He expertly flicked it into the fire pit, igniting the logs within it.
"You came out here earlier today, didn't you?"
"What gave you that idea?" he asked wryly, and she blushed, looking away. "Sorry," he sighed. "Just...bad at this. With you."
"I am too," she whispered as the fire crackled to life, and she sat down on the felled log.
"It's why we're doing this...right?" he questioned, clearly looking for reassurance as he sat down on the log a few feet away from her.
"Yeah," she let out slowly in a burst of air. "It is."
She bent down to pick up a beer and Inuyasha's eyes widened, starting to tell her to not open it yet, but it was too late. The fatal metallic 'click' of tin against tin rang out through the clearing, and the can sprayed beer all over her. She squealed as the foam struck her, soaking her shirt as Inuyasha scooted backwards, holding his arm up to shield himself as best he could.
"Fuck!" she yelled, standing and shaking her hands, trying to dispel the amber liquid.
A low chuckling slowly filled the warm night air, and she turned to look down at Inuyasha. He held a hand up to his mouth, his eyes twinkling in amusement as his torso shook, his laughter slowly gaining volume and strength.
She looked down at herself - she was completely soaked and sticky and she hated it...but...it was funny. The whole night had this giant, awkward tension to it. This was so stupid and preventable and of course it would happen and...she didn't know why...but it was hilarious.
Giggles slowly bubbled up from her, until she too was laughing hysterically, her hands clasped over her mouth as his were. Her knees buckled and she collapsed back down onto the log, allowing the release of tension to consume her until finally, they were both gasping for air and wiping away the tears spilling down from their cheeks. Their faces were red - flushed from the strength of their laughter.
"I tried to warn you," he finally grinned, and she rolled her eyes, a smile still tugging the corners of her lips up.
"You did," Kagome agreed, looking down at her shirt. "Ugh!" she moaned. "I'm going to be sticky all night!"
He didn't say anything in response, and when she turned to him to make another comment, she felt it die on her tongue. He was slowly unbuttoning his shirt, peeling himself out of it.
"Here," he offered, removing himself from the garment and handing it to her. "Why don't you wash yours in the lake and put this on instead. Don't think it got too wet," he grinned cheekily. She gave him a warm, grateful smile, reaching out to take his shirt. Her fingers lightly brushed against his, and she felt the butterflies return to her stomach at the brief contact.
"Thank you...won't you get cold?" he was in nothing but a white tank top now, and while they did have a fire, and while it was summer, she was still worried. He shrugged off her concern, insisting he would be fine.
"I'm not gonna get sick from being out here in just this," he smirked, tugging at his shirt. "Take it. Get cleaned up, and don't worry 'bout it, kay?"
"Ok," she blushed, stepping behind the log to walk over to the lake. "No peeking," she called lightly over her shoulder as she reached the lake, but she didn't hear a response.
Fuck - she was soaked! She quickly peeled herself out of her shirt, letting it drop to the grassy ground before working on her bra. It too fell to the ground, and the summer air kissed her bare skin, making her arms break out in goosebumps.
She dropped to her bare knees at the edge of the water, cupping her palms and dipping them in to gather water and clean her damp skin. She shivered lightly as a breeze caressed her exposed skin, and quickly moved on to dunking her shirt and undergarment into the water. She did her best to rub them clean and remove the beer, but it was hard to tell how clean she was really getting them without light. She just had to guess they were done, wring them out, and call it a day.
Well.
Night, really.
She slipped into the shirt Inuyasha had lent her, buttoning it until she reached the waistband of her shorts, and tied the excess into a knot. She knew he was larger than her but...she was swimming in this! It had fit him so well too...It was just another reminder of how much he had changed over the last seven years.
She shook her head, dispelling negative thoughts as they began to creep into the corners of her mind, and gathered her clothing to lay out by the fire. When she returned, Inuyasha's cheeks were bright red, and he refused to look her in the eye.
He totally peeked.
She mentally sighed as she laid the clothing out. She couldn't really get too mad...She would have done the same if their roles were reversed, and it wasn't like it was anything he hadn't seen before. Besides, she doubted he could really see that much in this light anyways.
Kagome heard him mutter something under his breath as she laid her bra out (she thought it might have been fucking hell?) and reached into his back pocket, taking out a flask. He quickly unscrewed it, tilting his head back and taking a long, deep swig from the bottle.
"Here," he offered when he was done, holding the flask up for her. When she didn't immediately take it, he rolled his eyes and waved it again, tilting the bottle from side to side. "Drink some."
"I…" she hesitated, and he sighed in exasperation.
"What's the matter? Don't wanna drink from the same bottle? Scared of my germs? My tongue has been down your throat before, ya know..."
"As I recall, more than just your tongue's been down there," she mumbled, and he arched an eyebrow.
"See? Might as well then. This is easier to swallow anyways," he smirked, and she tried not to choke.
Jerk had a point.
Like hell she was going to admit that though...but she did want the flask. She snatched it and downed some of the liquor, her throat burning as the whiskey touched it. She handed the flask back to him, rubbing her lips with the back of her hand when she was done.
"You brought whiskey with you?"
"Thought we could use it," he shrugged, a smirk tugging the corner of his lips up as he repeated her justification from earlier. "It's a lot less explosive than beer. I, um...I also brought marshmallows? If you wanted to roast some..."
"Depends - did you also bring chocolate and gram crackers?"
His smirk morphed into a wide grin and he grabbed his old, high school backpack, handing it to her. She opened it and saw that he had brought more than just stuff for s'mores. He had potato chips in her favorite flavor, a mad libs book, a deck of cards, uno, gummy bears, and a bunch of other stuff...He had really prepared.
His bag was packed with all of the things they used to love doing together as kids when he became human. Minus the video games. He had to have brought this out here sometime earlier in the day and the heat might not have been good for the electronics. Still...he went through a lot of trouble to get this ready.
Her heart melted a little at the thought.
He always was a planner. The night he proposed to her was no different. He brought her here, and they had a picnic by the fire. It wasn't anything extravagant - just some simple sandwiches he had made because they traveled well. When they were done, he handed her the newest wooden puzzle box his father had made, daring her to open it.
Not one to back down from a challenge, she got to work, twisting and pulling until she finally got the top off, and gasped when she saw the ring box. He plucked it out, dropped to one knee and…
She mentally gave herself a shake. She didn't want to dive into those old memories. Not yet, anyways. She wanted to wait until they were more ready than they were now. They were hardly on good speaking terms. Just jumping in...it felt like a mistake.
"S'mores sound great," she grinned, taking out the marshmallows and metal coat hangers. He reached back over to his backpack, taking out the chocolate and graham crackers. "Here," she offered, handing him a coat hanger with a skewered marshmallow.
"Thanks," he replied quietly, the barest hint of a smile tugging at his lips as he kneeled closer to the pit. She watched him lower his marshmallow near the flames to toast it, and she joined him.
She lowered the marshmallow into the pit beside his and turned to look at him out of the corner of her eye. The light from the fire flickered over his features, bathing him in warm oranges and golds. She absently watched as he rotated the hanger, expertly browning his marshmallow. A certain softness she hadn't seen in years graced his being, and she found herself entranced by his beauty.
There really was no other word for it.
He had always been, and would always be, the most beautiful man in the world to her. Yes, he was rugged and a manly man...but at times, when he let his guard down...he was simply beautiful.
"Kagome!" he yelled, and she shot him a confused look as he grabbed her hanger in a panic, bringing it out of the pit. She had been so caught up staring at him, lost in her thoughts, that she didn't notice it had caught fire. He started rapidly blowing on it, trying to put out the flames. "Well...I hope you wanted it burnt to a crisp?" he tried, sighing in relief once the fire was out.
"Not really," she cringed, her words coming out in a mumble. Fuck! How could she let herself become so distracted? She absently noticed him glance from her marshmallow to his perfectly golden one, and he traded hangers with her, ignoring her protests.
"I don't mind a little charcoal," he shrugged, taking out the graham cracker and chocolate.
"Since when?" she replied, suspiciously.
"Since I decided I didn't," he shot back, raising a brow, challenging her to argue with him. Instead, she just slumped down and shot him a grateful smile.
"Thanks, Inuyasha."
"It's nothing," he shrugged, assembling his s'more and biting into it. He choked a little and took his whiskey back out, taking a few swigs. How that helped, she had no idea, but it must have.
"I guess I take after my dad," she absently mused. "Remember that time we all gathered out back in our yard? Your parents and Sessh came over for dinner after we just started dating?"
"Wait...Are you...Are you talking about Sugar Daddy?"
"You remember!"
"Woman, how could I forget!" he barked out a laugh. "Fuck...Your father almost scarred me for life!"
Her grin only widened at the light sparkling in his taupe eyes.
"We were what," she continued, "Only thirteen? And we were talking about something that completely distracted him."
"Probably football," Inuyasha supplied, and Kagome nodded enthusiastically, agreeing. Their fathers were both huge football fans - nothing could distract her father like football. Except baseball. Or basketball...but she remembered that it was fall. School had been in session for a while at that point.
"Next second we hear Mama yelling that his marshmallow is on fire. And we were sitting on the other side of the pit..."
"He starts waving it around like a madman, not realizing that when he swings it back just the right way-"
"-It'll come shooting off the end, catapulting towards us? Thank God you had some speed on you! He almost hit you!"
"Pretty sure the tip of my ear got singed," Inuyasha joked lightly.
"Oh stop - it did not!"
"But it coulda!"
"If it did, he wouldn't have given you the speech after," she smirked.
"Oh fuck...That speech…"
"I hope this taught you a valuable lesson, son," Kagome imitated. "If you hurt my daughter, I can turn anything into a weapon and come after you."
"A flaming marshmallow though?"
"He was creative," she shrugged. "Almost as creative as your dad calling him Sugar Daddy for the next five years."
"I think he just liked saying he was going to meet up with his 'Sugar Daddy' when we went on dates," Inuyasha grumbled.
"Maybe…" she agreed, watching him finish off his s'more. "They absolutely used us as an excuse to go on man dates."
"Can you blame them," Inuyasha snorted. "We wanted to go to the movies together. Alone. They wanted to grab a beer. Without kids. It was a win win."
"Mmm...especially when the 'big game' was on. Do you know how many times I freaked out thinking I was going to get in trouble going out with you on a school night?"
"Please! Pops was the one telling me to ask ya! Kept pestering me about it until I did it. 'Hey son...why don't you ask Kagome out on Thursday next week?'," he imitated. "'But I have school the next day - won't I get in trouble?' 'You let me deal with your mother. Just ask her out.'"
"You never told me your dad was the one getting you to do that!"
"It's not like he had to twist my arm, Kagome," he smiled wryly. "It worked out pretty well for both of us. He got to go out with your dad...and...I got to go out with you. Like I said. Win win. Pretty sure our moms caught on and got in on it too. I remember coming back once and Ma was more than a lil' tipsy."
Kagome snorted, imagining her mother telling Izayoi to bring over the fancy cheese because she had the merlot, and he let out a full bodied laugh at the imagery.
She loved hearing that laugh. It felt like ages since she had made him laugh. She wanted to do it again, and soon they were trading stories, all starting out with "do you remember when..." or "remember that time you…". It was nice. It felt like old times. Comfortable. Like she hadn't broken his heart right here, in this very spot...giving him back his grandmother's solitaire ring with tears in her eyes.
They eventually settled into a companionable silence, just staring into the flickering flames before them. Inuyasha would occasionally add another log to the pit, sparks flaring up into the darkness around them as he introduced the new wood.
"I didn't handle it well," Inuyasha confessed, the quiet timbre of his voice breaking the silence. He had moved down onto the grass, his legs spread out in front of him. His fingers absently toyed with the lid of the flask, slowly twisting it this way and that.
"What didn't you handle well," she prodded, her voice matching the quiet, contemplative tone of his.
"Us," he whispered, propping a knee up and tilting his head back to stare at the night sky. "You leavin'. I could have been more supportive...Coulda encouraged you more. Done more to show ya I loved you and trusted ya...Believed in your dreams...But I was just...so fucking hurt, Kagome. You don't even understand. You didn't even tell me you were applying to college. Ya just fucking did it."
"And I needed your approval?"
"You never needed my approval to do anything," he replied wryly. "But...fuck, Kagome. Ya didn't even include me! You didn't tell me you were even thinking 'bout it. Ya just did. And then you sprung it on me. Do you know how deeply that cut me? That you wouldn't confide in me? Tell me what ya were thinking of doing? I coulda been better...And...And I know I said and did shit that wasn't right...but I just...You were cutting me out of your life, Kagome!"
"I know," she whispered, moving off of the log to sit beside him on the ground. "It wasn't fair to you. I could have been better too, Inuyasha. I just...I needed to leave. I needed to get away from this place. It was so hard when Gramps had a stroke...and then Papa had a heart attack not even a month later...Inuyasha I was so broken."
"And I couldn't help fix you," he whispered, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes. "I wasn't enough..."
"No one was enough. I had to ruin my life to see how broken I was," she whimpered, taking his hands into hers as she watched a few glimmering tears roll down his cheek, and she felt her own throat tightening. "I had to lose you to see I needed help, and I needed to leave Montana and put some distance between myself and their deaths. Everywhere I looked, I saw them and it hurt that much more. Papa had always encouraged me to be a writer. You know that..."
"Yeah," he breathed. "I do. Thought I did too."
"You did...but you wanted me to be a writer here. I wanted to see if I could do more. I felt like I was honoring his memory, if I did this. He always told me to pursue my dreams."
"And your dreams didn't involve me," he choked, turning his head away from her.
"Of course they did!" she insisted, her vision blurring. "I just wasn't ready...Inuyasha, if you had waited to propose until after I graduated from college, I would have come home and married you and...and I would have been satisfied."
"I could have waited for you until after you finished," he snapped, turning to look at her. His cheeks were wet. His chest heaving. "Damnit, Kagome...I would have been happy with a long engagement! I didn't think we were going to get married the next day! If you wanted to wait a few years, I would have waited! I loved you so fucking much...I wanted you. I would have given you the goddamn moon! I just didn't know how else to show you I supported you, because you're right. You were pulling away and I didn't know how to fix us. I...I would have done anything for you, Kagome. Anything."
She couldn't have held back the tears even if she had wanted to...and she didn't. She let them fall freely down her cheeks, pooling at her chin to drop onto his shirt.
"I know. We...we could have been better to each other. We were children, trying to be adults. We couldn't do it. We weren't ready...we were too young, Inuyasha."
"Yeah, we were…" he agreed, taking his hands back from her to wipe his cheeks, allowing her to do the same. He unscrewed the cap of his flask and took a long, deep swig before handing it to her, absently staring into the fire.
She took it and drank, the warm amber liquid burning her already tight throat. God...it fucking hurt unleashing seven years of locked up pain...But she had known going into tonight that it would and she was proud that they were finally talking. This was what they should have done seven years ago...but they hadn't been ready. She had meant it when she had said that they were children trying to act like adults.
She capped the flask and handed it back to him, staring absently into the fire.
This was a start.
But they were far from over.
They needed to go further.
Deeper into the pain of their past.
It was time he knew the truth. He deserved to know the truth. Even if he cursed her. Despised her after. Even if he...Even if he hated her for the rest of her life.
He needed to know.
"I...I need to tell you something, Inuyasha," she began shakily, and she watched his eyes turn to her as his head continued to face ahead towards the flames. "That night I came back from college over Thanksgiving break," she choked out, not needing to say more. They knew the night she was referring to.
It was the night she broke up with him.
He brought her here. To their place. Planned a romantic evening with her with warm cider and thick blankets and gazing at the stars...Told her about the plot of land his parents had given him - them - to build a house. It was their engagement present to them. A spot halfway between the home she had grown up in, and the home he had grown up in. He showed her the plans he had been working on for it...And she...She ended them.
"What about it," he asked roughly.
"I...I thought I was telling you the truth but...I wasn't. I never cheated on you."
There. She said it.
She saw him flick his gaze to the fire for a moment before returning stare at her out of the corner of his eye, and she took a shuddering breath before continuing.
"I was out of control when I got to college. I was drinking almost every night. Struggling in all of my classes. Constantly partying. It's a miracle I didn't lose my scholarship.
One night I went with Ayame...she was my wolf demon roommate, at the time, to a party. I don't remember it. Or what I did...but I woke up with just a bra on in another guy's bed, and a naked frat guy was passed out next to me. I didn't know until I came back from break that I didn't...that we didn't sleep together. We didn't even touch.
Ayame told me. Said she never smelled him on me in that way. But it...it was too late by then. I ruined us. I'm so sorry, Inuyasha. I...I never meant for it to get so bad. I started seeing a therapist a few weeks later when I finally accepted that I needed help, because I was just so fucking broken."
He was silent, gathering his thoughts, playing with the flask again, and it was killing her inside. She could feel her heart beat harder and harder the longer he remained silent. Oh God...what had she done? What was he thinking? What was going through his head? Did he hate her? Could he forgive her? Maybe this had been a mistake. Maybe she should have never-
"I know you never cheated on me."
His words were so soft, she almost thought she imagined it.
"Y-you knew?"
He raised a hand and tapped his nose.
"Of course I knew. You said it happened two days before. You think I wouldn't have known?"
"T-then why-"
"-You wanted out. I loved you so much...but I wasn't gonna to keep you a prisoner in our relationship. I meant it when I said I thought that proposing would help. It was the last thing I could think of, and I had tried everything at that point. I loved you so fucking much, Kagome. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. I wasn't lying about that...But...I didn't know what to do anymore.
You came to me with this story about cheating on me...I had to let you go, and pray that one day, you would come back. What's that sayin'? 'If you love someone, set them free. If they come back they're yours; if they don't they never were'. That's why I waited for four years. I thought you needed your time to live your life...and then when you were ready, you'd come back to me, and we could find a way back to us. I was wrong."
"Inuyasha…" she breathed, the tears flowing freely down her cheeks.
"Why didn't you tell me? You could have called me as soon as you found out it wasn't true. We could have talked. We could have tried to make it work still...If you knew, why did you just...let me go?"
"I...I don't know. I was still so broken...and that last conversation was so bad Inuyasha…" she whispered brokenly, her salty tears slipping into her mouth. "I wasn't ready when I found out the truth. I couldn't, I...I…"
He knew. All this time he knew. And he let her go because she was that bad. He thought it was the last thing he could do to help her.
Because he loved her that fucking much.
He leaned over and pulled her into his arms, rubbing her back.
"We both fucked up," he whispered into her hair. "We fucked up so badly."
"We did," she sobbed. "I'm so sorry, Inuyasha. I'm so sorry…"
"Me too, Kagome. I...Me too..."
A/N: Oh hai! Plz dun shoot meh? We shoot meh I can't provide the smoots later today. Cause I still have OLR smoots to post. But later.
Also, voting has started over at the Feudal Connection at Tumblr! If you like this piece, please consider voting for it! It's been nominated for best AU and best angst! If you're ho hum about this one, but like A Heart's Abduction, that one has also been nominated for best AU! I'm you're meh about everything, check out who has also been nominated and vote for their thing instead! You'll help make someone's day. Voting closes May 13.
Until next time!
-LL