Chapter 22: What it Means to be Human

A/N- Hey guys! I'm back on schedule! Before reading I just wanted you to be aware that this chapter's going to be a little different because of what happened in the last chapter. So instead of just hearing from Kit's POV, we'll be hearing from other's POV as well. Hopefully, it's clear who's POV is who's. I'm testing this out so let me know if you liked this or not. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: I do not own Doctor Who, it belongs to BBC

Shine a light- Banners

Light will lead the way, will set you free

'Cause I'm only looking for a little peace

And when the night falls

Oh, call on me

Just don't forget to show me some mercy

Please, please, please! He begged in his head as he watched the white dot blink across the screen.

"The vault is sealed," Van Statten announced.

The Doctor stood up and dialed Rose phone. Someone picked up after a couple of rings.

"Rose? Kit? Did you make it?" He asked frantically.

There was a long pause. "Yeah, Rose made it," he heard Kit say on the other line.

The Doctor let up a sigh of relief. It was Rose who he was most worried about. Kit was a fast runner. He knew she could make it without a doubt but Rose was slower. If she made it then that meant they were both safe.

"You two need to get up here to Van Stattens office. We can decide what to do there," he told her.

It was silent on the other end again. "Yeah sure, there's just one problem."

"What's that?"

"I'm kinda stuck on the other side of the door."

He froze. It wasn't possible. There was no way that Rose made it but Kit didn't. He felt like he couldn't breath. She was stuck with a Dalek. A twelve-year-old girl was stuck with a death machine.

"You didn't make it," was all he could say.

"Guess I wasn't as fast as I thought I was," she tried to joke but it fell flat.

"How?"

"Oh you know, doing something stupid again."

"Kit—"

"Don't. Whatever you're about to say, just don't. I don't blame you or Rose. Sometimes shitty things just happen. Anyways, I've been in worse situations. I'll be fine… at least for a bit."

"Kit, you don't understand—"

"Yes I do, Doctor, I really do understand."

No you don't! He wanted to shout. How could she possibly understand what was going to happen? She was going to die and it was his fault. He needed her to understand that but there was a thought. A thought that has bothered him for sometime; maybe she did understand.

"Shit!" Kit exclaimed suddenly, snapping the Doctor out of his daze.

"What? What is it?"

"It's here." There was a pause. "Look Doctor, if I do die just know, I—I'm—I'm sorry. I know this won't make any sense but it will. I don't hate you. I could never hate you."

Before the Doctor could ask what she was talking about, he heard the Daleks say exterminate. There was a loud zap noise and then nothing. He took his head piece out of his ear.

His vision started to blur with tears. "I killed her."

"I'm sorry," he heard Van Statten say.

The Doctor snapped his head to him. He was angry, beyond angry. He was angry at the Dalek, angry at Van Statten but mostly he was angry a himself.

"I said I'd protect her. She was only here because of me, and you're sorry? I could've killed that Dalek in it's cell, but you stopped me."

"It was the prize of my collection!" Van Statten tried to justify.

"Your collection?!" The Doctor barked. "But was it worth it? Worth all those men's deaths? Worth Kittredge? Let me tell you something, Van Statten. Mankind goes into space to explore, to be part of something greater."

"Exactly!" Van Statten stood up. "I wanted to touch the stars!"

"You just want to drag the stars down and stick them underground, underneath tons of sand and dirt, and label them. You're about as far from the stars as you can get," the Doctor argued then grew sad again. "And you took her down with you. She was twelve years old."

Suddenly the elevator behind him opened to reveal Rose and Adam. Rose eyes were red and buffy. He could tell that she had been crying.

"What happened?" He asked them. "How did Kit not make it?"

"It was my fault," Rose muttered. "I wasn't fast enough and Kit—she wouldn't—I told her to leave me behind! I told her to go but she was too stubborn. She made sure I got to the door but it slowed her down too much."

The Doctor wasn't sure what to say or feel. Part of him wanted to keep being angry and yell at someone but it was no one's fault but his own. Another part of him wanted to laugh. Of course Kit would do something like that. It was in her nature just like it was in his. She had to do something so stupid.

Before he could speak, a new voice interrupted him. "Open the bulkhead or Kittredge dies."

...

Kit stared at the closed bulkhead. She closed her eyes tight and breathed deeply. She was stuck.

Was this a bad idea? Yes. Did she regret doing this? Kind of, yes. But would she do it again? In a heartbeat. She didn't know what was going to happen to her but what she did know was that Rose didn't deserve to die. Or maybe Rose was suppose to die here and she just messed things up. She really wished there was some kind of rule book for this. Now she was possibly going to die instead.

It might not kill me, she thought.

She still had one thing going for her and that was Rose DNA. A Dalek taking human DNA had it change it somehow. It could feel compassion and love or at least she hoped. There was also a big possibility that her DNA didn't do anything to this Dalek and these were her last moments.

Rose phone that she still had in her hand started ringing. She knew it was the Doctor. She took a deep breath in and answered it.

"Rose? Kit? Did you make it?" He asked frantically.

"Yeah, Rose made it."

She heard him sigh in relief. "You two need to get up here to Van Stattens office. We can decide what to do there."

Kit bit her lip. "Yeah sure, there's just one problem."

"What's that?"

"I'm kinda stuck on the other side of the door."

He didn't say anything for a good minute. "You didn't make it." It wasn't a question.

"Guess I wasn't as fast as I thought I was," she tried to joke.

"How?"

"Oh you know, doing something stupid again."

"Kit—"

"Don't. Whatever you're going to say, just don't. I don't blame you or Rose. Sometimes shitty things just happen. Anyways, I've been in worse situations. I'll be fine… at least for a bit."

"Kit, you don't understand—"

Kit wanted to laugh. "Yes I do, Doctor, I really do understand."

She could suddenly hear faint noises behind her. She turned around to see the Dalek rounding the corner. She sucked in a breath.

"Shit!" She cursed.

"What? What is it?"

"It's here," she replied.

Watching it make its way towards her was making her hope of surviving dwindle down. What would happen if she died? Would the Tardis erase the Doctors memory of her altogether? Would her Doctor know she was dead? It was hard to think that if she did die she would never be reunited with her Doctor. She would never be able to tell him how sorry she was.

She looked at the phone in her hand. She still could apologize. The Doctor would remember eventually or at least she hoped he would.

She put the phone back to her ear. "Look Doctor, if I do die just know, I—I'm—I'm sorry. I know this won't make any sense but it will. I don't hate you. I could never hate you."

The Dalek was now right in front of her. Kit straightened her back. She wasn't going to look weak. The Dalek wasn't getting that satisfaction.

"Exterminate!"

Kit shut her eyes waiting for the pain to hit but she never felt it. What confused her more was that she heard the zap of its gun go off but she felt nothing.

Kit opened her eyes slowly. She moved her fingers to make sure she was in fact fine. When she opened her eyes fully she saw the Dalek still in front of her.

Kit smiled widely. "I'm alive!" Then she frowned. "I'm alive? Why am I alive?"

The Dalek didn't say anything for a moment. "I… do not know."

"You don't know? How do you not know?"

"Something is wrong."

"I'd say. I've never seen a Dalek not kill."

"I will still kill you! It is my purpose!" It yelled at her.

"Then do it!" She shouted back but the Dalek didn't move. "You can't do it, can you… because of Rose."

"Rose?"

She grinned and started to circle the Dalek. "What do you feel right now?"

"Sadness."

"And?"

"Fear."

She stopped in front of it. "Man, you most hate that. Daleks? Feeling? Pretty sure that's blasphemy to you guys."

"You are mocking me! Do not mock me!" It shouted shooting everywhere but her.

Kit just laughed. "And I'm still alive. Can you guess why? Why you feel? I figured it out, did you?"

"Rose Tyler," it said slowly. "She gave me life from her DNA."

"And you're feeling what she's feeling. The fear and sadness for me. She doesn't want me dead…oddly enough. Which means you don't either. You know what that means? You're turning human!" She smiled.

"Silence! You are safe for now but not forever."

Her smile dropped. It was right. Eventually it would fight Rose feelings and when it did, she was dead.

She tried to cover her panic. She shrugged. "Fine, you'll kill me but then what? Huh? It's not like you can get out of here. You're stuck… both of us are."

"No."

"No?"

"No, I am not stuck."

She raised an eyebrow in question. "Pretty sure you are, Buddy."

"Watch," was all it said.

It turned its eye piece up and Kit looked up as well to see a video screen on the wall. She had no idea what it was planning. It moved behind her and pointed its gun into her back. The video screen turned on to reveal the Doctor, Rose, Adam and Van Statten.

"Open the bulkhead or Kittredge dies," it warned.

She saw the Doctors eyes light up. "You're alive."

She shrugged. "What can I say? I'm like a cat, I got nine lives."

The Doctor grew serious. "I thought you were dead."

"Yeah, me too."

"Open the bulkhead!" The Dalek interrupted.

"Don't, Doctor!" Kit argued. "Listen to me. Its turning almost human-like. It won't kill me, not yet at least."

"Silence!" It yelled at her and pushed its gun harder into her back. "What use are emotions if you will not save the child you care so deeply about."

There was a long silence and nobody moved. "I killed her once. I can't do it again," the Doctor finally said.

The bulkhead opened shortly after. The Dalek pushed her forward. She really hoped the Doctor knew what he was doing.

...

The minute the video turned off Van Statten snapped his head towards the Doctor. "What do we do now, you soft hearted fool? What the hell do we do?"

"Kill it when it gets here," Adam suggested.

"All the guns are useless, and the alien weapons are in the vault," Goddard pointed out.

"Only the catalogued ones."

"What are you taking about, British?" Van Statten demanded.

"My office, I might have something that could be useful."

"Whatever we're doing, we need to do it now. Kit's waiting for us," the Doctor jumped in.

Rose shook her head in disbelief. She couldn't believe what she was hearing. They were planning to kill. Sure, she expected this from Van Statten. She even could understand Adam but the Doctor? She didn't think it was possible. She knew this alien was dangerous but for the Doctor to just easily agree to kill was scary.

"Wait, hold on," Rose finally cut in. "We can't kill it; I won't let you."

The Doctor didn't look happy with this statement. "That thing killed hundreds of people!"

"Killing isn't going to make up for those death," Rose retorted.

"It'll give me peace!"

Rose watched him in absolute shock. "Killing would give you peace? I thought you were suppose to save lives not destroy them!"

The Doctor didn't waver. "I've got to do this. I've got to end it. The Daleks destroyed my home, my people. I've got nothing left."

Rose was starting to understand the Doctors anger. Still, she knew killing this thing was not the right way to move on.

"What about what Kittredge said? She said it was turning human-like."

"So?"

"So maybe we can talk to it. Reason with it," Rose suggested.

"Reason with it? Rose, Dalek aren't ones to reason with."

"Maybe most but what if this one's different. What if we don't have to kill?"

"And what if you're wrong and this gets Kit killed?" The Doctor snapped.

Rose bit her lip. He was right. What if she was wrong? What if Kit was wrong about it turning human-like? It's not like she really knew this alien. Maybe that's how it always acted.

An idea popped in her head. "We compromise then."

"What?"

"We try reasoning with it first but if that doesn't work, then we do it your way."

The Doctor pinched the bridge of his nose. "I don't know, Rose."

"Would you have killed it before the war? Or would you have tried a different approach?"

"I—it's complicated."

"What's so complicated?"

The Doctor's face started to crumble and his anger was disappearing into sadness. He looked tired all of a sudden.

"The war—I couldn't—I wasn't—Oh, Rose. They're all dead."

Rose took his hand. "But will killing it really bring them back?"

They stared at each other a long moment until the Doctor gave her a soft smile. He squeezed her hand.

"Rose, I am so happy I met you."

Rose smiled back. "Me too."

"Sorry to ruin this heart warming moment," Van Statten interrupted. "But a death machine is still wondering around. What's the plan already?"

"We do Rose plan. We'll try to reason with it but if it can't be reached then we destroy it." The Doctor turned to Adam. "Show me what you got."

Van Statten huffed. "This should go well."

...

"So what's the plan?" Kit asked as they went down the hall. "You kill me and the Doctor, then what? You kill the rest of the world?"

"Yes," it replied simply.

"Ah, I see. Can't see how that would fail," She muttered. "But what about after that? Just keep killing till every race is gone?"

"Yes."

"And then?"

It stopped and Kit turned to watch it. "And…then?"

"Yeah, then what?"

"Then the Dalek have finally won," it said proudly.

"But there aren't any Dalek left, it's just you."

"Then—then—"

"Then you'll be completely alone."

It didn't reply back. She had got it. It had been questioning itself for a while. She wanted it to keep questioning. It could change the way it thinks about killing and she might be able to get out of this alive.

"Keep moving," it told her and pushed her with its gun.

Kit frowned. She guessed she didn't get it to question enough. It seemed to still have a plan in mind. They walked on for a bit long before Kit started to get annoyed.

"Where are we going?" Kit demanded.

"Up," it replied and Kit saw the elevator in the distance.

"And once we're up?"

"Exterminate Van Statten!"

Kit haulted in her tracks. "What?"

"I will kill Van Statten for what he did to me."

"You can't."

"And why not? He does not deserve to live."

"I agree that Van Statten is a shitty person but you can't just kill someone over it!"

"This is my purpose."

"But it's not anymore. Don't you see, you're changing into something more then just a mindless killing machine."

"You are wrong."

Kit snorted. "You and I both know that's not true. I'm sure you can feel it. Feel it stirring inside you. The feeling of humanity. Tell me, does it burn?"

She couldn't help but mock the Dalek. It felt good. After years of being afraid of them, it felt good to have the upper hand. Was it fair? Probably not. This Dalek was confused. She should try to help it, not tease the thing. Still, maybe if she provoked it enough it would realize that killing was bad.

"No, it does not burn. It is…cold."

"You feel cold?" Kit questioned.

"Yes, cold but the death of Van Statten will bring warmth," it concluded.

"Oh, Buddy, that's not how it works…trust me."

"I do not understand."

"For humans, killing doesn't make you feel warm. You'll just get colder. So cold that it'll get into your bones and you'll think you'll never be warm again," she confessed.

The Dalek didn't say anything for a moment. "You sound like you know this from experience."

"Maybe but it's none of your business!" She snapped.

"Fine. If I cannot become warm through killing anymore, then what do I do?" It pleaded.

Kit shrugged. "I don't know. I can't tell you, that's up to you. What do you want? What do you think will make you happy?"

It was silent and just stared at her. "Freedom."

"Freedom?"

"Yes, I want freedom. I—I want to feel the sun."

Kit couldn't believe what she was hearing. She knew it was turning human but she had no idea how much.

"Okay, let's give you freedom."