Whooo this was a busy week, lovelies. I've gotten to a very interesting part of the story, post-Liberio, and I got a second wind with writing. So the story's coming along well and I can't wait to see what you all think of the following chapters. We're slowly approaching the last two arcs (Marley and then the Rumbling) and things are kind of heating up for our characters. But I'll stop ranting for now, and let you get on with reading!
As always my lovelies, go ahead and enjoy this chapter and don't forget to toss me a little review, to let me know what you think~ ;)
P.S. All Attack on Titan characters belong to Isayama Hajime. I only own my OCs.
33. We need a break
~ 851 ~
"So there you have it. Erwin thinks we need a break..."
Having silently listened to Natalie as she gave him the short version of what she had discussed with Erwin in his office, Levi at last looked over from where he had been grooming his mare.
"Maybe we should do as he says. You're not exactly getting any better by staying here."
"But can we afford to do that now?" she sighed, handing Ada another apple and patting her muzzle.
"...Maybe. It'll take at least a week or more until this whole mapping operation is ready to go. We could take a few days off."
Finishing up he wiped the water off his hands and stepped out of the pen to the redhead.
"You need a distraction." he said, cradling her face in his hands and pressing a kiss to her forehead. "You're stressing out too much about things we haven't even faced yet. These constant nightmares are going to break you, sooner or later. You need to forget that you're a soldier, at least for a few days... maybe it'll help."
"Um... Captain? Maybe I can help with that."
Sasha's voice startled both of them into noticing the girl had come in through the back door of the stables, carrying an armful of hay for her steed. While Levi stepped back from Natalie, the redhead offered him a sympathetic look before turning back to Sasha.
"Well, you see..." she went on, flustered that she suddenly had the attention of both of them. "There's going to be a festival in my village next week. I was already thinking of how to ask the Commander for permission to invite everyone on the squad, so... m-maybe this will help."
"...I don't see why not." Levi at last replied, after what felt like forever of staring down the girl until she shifted on her feet uncomfortably. "I'll talk to Erwin about it later."
And so the following morning as the sun was barely rising over the horizon, the stables were abuzz with their team saddling their horses.
"Why do we have to leave so early?" Jean complained with an obnoxious yawn.
"It should take at least a couple hours, if not more, before we reach Sasha's village." Armin replied, walking by with his own saddle.
"But why this early?" he kept pouting, while making sure the saddle was strapped properly to his ride.
"If you don't want to come, no one's forcing you." Levi retorted.
"N-no... I apologize, Captain..." the boy gulped, instinctively straightening his back at the sound of the young Ackerman's voice.
"We'll have a great time, you'll see." Sasha grinned, patting her mare's neck. "My parents will be so happy to have us there. I wrote to them a couple of months ago and they're eager to meet all of you."
"Captain... should we take some supplies with us?" Eren asked. "I'm sure Sasha's family won't complain, but we will be imposing on them with a lot of extra mouths to feed; even if it's only for a few days."
"Yeah. We'll stop at the market on the way out and stock up." Levi nodded. "I had Connie and Mikasa ready a cart for it."
"Captain, we finished loading the tents and blankets." Mikasa announced, having just stepped into the stables. "Sasha, are you sure your parents won't mind that we'll be showing up with so many people unannounced?"
"I'm telling you they'll be happy to see everyone." the girl waved her off.
=0=0=
The group had just approached the expansive farm, leaving behind the village and the cheers of its inhabitants. In spite of their civilian clothes, most of the villagers had recognized Sasha and thus figured out they were Survey Corps soldiers.
"It's so weird to be treated as heroes when all we do is our job." Armin contemplated aloud as the voices faded in the distance.
"People always need something or someone to look up to." Connie replied from his seat on the cart's coach box. "Besides it's not like we haven't done anything worthy of praise, right?"
"So long as you don't let it get to your head." Levi concluded. "Use it as motivation, rather than to inflate your egos."
As they arrived at the main gate and dismounted, a pair of girls came running from somewhere on the farm grounds to tackle Sasha.
"Big Sis!" one of them cheered. "We really missed you!"
"You didn't tell us you were coming home!" the other one grinned, clinging to the young woman.
"I thought I'd surprise you!" Sasha replied, tousling their hair. "I hope you listened to Mom and Dad while I was gone."
While Natalie had to admit she too had been nervous about showing up unannounced, it was clear that Sasha had been right. Her parents had been more than happy to meet them and offer to host the entire squad for as long as they wanted to stay.
"It's a great honor ta finally meet ye, Captain..." the girl's father smiled, exchanging a handshake with Levi. "I hope me daughter hasn't been much trouble."
"Just Levi is alright. And she hasn't... she may be a gluttonous idiot, but she certainly has her uses."
For a split second the man blinked at him, and Natalie wondered if maybe Levi should have tried putting it more nicely, before he burst out laughing much to Sasha's embarrassment.
"Couldn't have said it better meself!" he replied, plopping a hand onto her head. "But let's not stand 'ere; ye must be tired from the road. Lisa, think we oughtta get started on lunch."
While the woman nodded in agreement, Levi turned back to the rest of their group.
"Alright; Mikasa, Sasha, Armin... you and Natalie help unload the supplies and see if you can help in the kitchen. The rest of you come with me to set up the tents."
"I'll show ye a good spot to put 'em." Mr. Brause offered, following the young Ackerman to the cart to help them unload the tents and blankets. "Aletta, fetch Otto an' Egon ta come help with this."
"Yes, Mr. Brause!" the chestnut-haired girl nodded running off towards the stables, while the other team grabbed the supply crates and followed his wife towards the house.
After lunch the girls had offered to help with the rest of the animals, leaving Levi and the rest of the squad to join the two boys in the stables. While Sasha's parents had insisted they were guests, the young Captain wouldn't have it claiming they would grow lazy if they didn't work. It was only after dinner that he had given them any free time that day. And he was soon to be found sitting on the porch steps in the waning daylight, watching Natalie who had joined their squad and the kids to tell stories around a campfire. He would never be able to tell how long he had watched them in silence, looking for... well he wasn't too sure what he was even looking for. Maybe he was trying to find some sign on her face that she was, if not better already, at least on the road there. Maybe he wanted to know that she wouldn't have to suffer through any more nightmares, that he had made the right choice by getting her away from the barracks.
But then his thoughts were interrupted by movement in his peripheral vision, and he looked up to find Sasha's father smiling down at him while holding out a beer bottle. Nodding in gratitude and accepting the drink, he moved over to make room for the man to sit with him.
"Sasha's told us why ye really came 'ere." he said, and Levi had to admit he was surprised by the empathy in the man's tone. "How long's it been goin' on?"
"...I've lost track by now." the young Ackerman replied, realization suddenly dawning on him in that regard. "Months; probably half a year already. At some point, the nights just... blurred together into one incomprehensible mess."
Turning his eyes back to the redhead who had joined in the banter at the expense of Sasha's eating habits, he found himself torn between wanting to smile and feeling like that wasn't the appropriate reaction.
"It's driving me insane to know that I can't help her." he admitted, clenching his hands onto the bottle he was holding. "That I have to watch her go through this, that I can only wait until it breaks her down."
"Yer already helpin' 'er." the man replied, drawing his confused gaze. "We humans are pack animals; just knowin' we got someone there fer us can help more than ye could imagine. Knowin' someone's got our back no matta what, knowin' we got someone ta live for is what gets most of us through each day. I'm sure if ye ask 'er, she'll say the same; that havin' ye there at 'er side is what keeps 'er goin', what keeps 'er from breakin' down."
Again Levi turned his eyes to the redhead seated among his squad, a long breath akin to a sigh leaving him.
"I can't even help her with this... with all my strength and my skill."
"Yer bein' too hard on yerself; ye can't always solve everyone's problems, nor should ye do that. She's strong an' she'll work through this on 'er own. All ye need ta do is jus' keep bein' there fer 'er... let 'er feed off yer strength when hers weakens, an' she'll be fine."
Looking back to the man's reassuring smile, upon feeling the hand weighing on his shoulder, Levi at last nodded. The advice was sound and made perfect sense, and yet he found it so hard to let go of his need to help her somehow. Sure, he had been there whenever she had needed him those past months, but was that really helping her? If it was, why wasn't she getting any better?
Ultimately those questions kept plaguing him late into the night, even as he lied in the tent listening to Natalie's soft breaths as she slept; relishing in her warmth, in the softness of her hair, in the feeling of her body so flawlessly fitting in his arms. He couldn't tell how long he spent mulling over his conversation with Sasha's father, but he was just about to doze off lulled by the sound of crickets outside, when he heard that now so familiar gasp coming from her just before she jerked awake.
"It's alright... I'm here." he whispered, rolling onto his side to properly embrace her as she heaved for breath.
At first, she only curled into his chest, leaving him to tenderly stroke her back, only speaking just when he was starting to think she might have fallen asleep again.
"I'm sorry... that you have to go through thi—"
"No, hush." he cut her off, pressing his lips to her cheek. "Don't ever be sorry for things you can't control."
"But—"
"I love you." he cut her off again, this time managing to silence her. "I don't care what I have to do, so long as it helps you. You just focus on getting better... you just do whatever you need to do for that. And whatever you need me to do, you just tell me. Whatever you need."
He didn't know how to better stress that he was willing to do anything to help her. Again he pressed a kiss to her cheek when she moved just enough to wrap an arm around his neck, hoping he'd gotten through to her this time.
"Try to get some more sleep." he goaded her.
When he went to lie on his back, she moved again pressing herself as close to him as she could. Smiling lightly at that, though she would never see it in the dark, he reached up to the hand she was resting on his chest bringing it to his lips to kiss her knuckles.
"Levi...?" she whispered after so long that he had been certain she'd fallen asleep again.
"What is it?"
"I love you."
"If you're trying to make me blush, you should've done it during the day when you could see it." he huffed on a humorous note while gingerly trailing his thumb over the back of her hand that he was still holding, smiling again at the sound of her giggle.
"I'm being serious..." she pouted, sounding far too amused to properly scold him.
"So am I; and I don't want you to take this the wrong way."
Though at first, she hadn't reacted thinking he was just playing along with her, at his last words he felt her perking up as she realized he was actually serious.
"What is it?" she asked and her tone told him he had her full attention.
"Maybe..." he sighed, still wondering if it was a good idea to reveal the line of thought he'd been contemplating that night. "Maybe what you really need is to not be a soldier anymore. You've always been far too kind for this; what if these nightmares are just your mind's way of telling you it's seen enough death and horror?"
For a long time it seemed, they lied there in silence listening to the crickets outside, until at last Natalie heaved a long sigh.
"I wish it was that easy. You know as well as I do that they'd never let me go; not me, not Eren, not Erwin. Even if by some miracle they would let us live a civilian life... we'd be under constant surveillance until we die. Back when I graduated from boot camp, I used to think I'd one day retire and maybe get married at last, like my parents wanted. That maybe I'd find a decent man in the military to make a family with. But... even if I wasn't a Titan shifter, I've learned since then that this career is a one-way path."
Feeling his hand squeezing her shoulder tighter as she spoke, she at last smiled and turned her head to press a tender kiss to his cheek.
"Besides... if I retired, I'd probably go insane with nothing to do all day while you work from dawn to dusk." she concluded in a more humorous tone, trying to ease the weight her words had left upon them.
"If your greatest concern is being bored, I could give you something that'd keep you busy for at least the next decade and a half."
Just by the way her laugh had turned to that familiar flustered note, he could tell she was blushing, and yet she again kissed his cheek before settling back into his arms.
"I would love that, to be honest." she giggled. "A tiny Levi running around the house..."
Though he said nothing more, he found that her words stayed with him long after she had at last fallen asleep again. He found himself trying to imagine what it would even feel like to hold a child and to know that it was his own flesh and blood, to know that he and Natalie had made that child together. In some ways it felt like a daunting task; it was one thing to visit the children at the orphanage and a whole other to actually raise a child.
'But if I have you with me... maybe...' he pondered, focusing again on Natalie's soft breaths. 'My mother did it by herself for years; at least I'd have an easier time because I wouldn't be alone.'
Of course, it would have to remain a dream for who knew how long still. But for once he found himself hoping with all his being that they would both live long enough to see it come true. If nothing else, he at least wanted to ensure that happiness for Natalie regardless of the cost; regardless of what he had to do to get to that point.
~ oOo ~
It was almost the end of their vacation in Sasha's home, and there was palpable excitement on the air as everyone in the village hurried with last-minute preparations for that night's festival. The girl's parents had volunteered their pasture, as it was a large enough space for everyone to gather together. While Mr. Brause and Levi along with the boys were helping the villagers set up the last tables, Natalie had gathered the girls along with Sasha's mother and spent the day helping to prepare enough food for everyone.
"Sasha... come here, I want you to try something." the redhead called, having hung back to cook one more dish after everyone had finished that evening.
"What, what?" Sasha grinned, hurrying over to the stove. "Whoa... that looks really good. What is it?"
"Rice pudding... I haven't made this for quite some time, but Levi liked it back then. I thought I'd surprise him. Here, how does that taste?"
Shoving a teaspoon of the white dessert into the girl's mouth, she watched as Sasha's expression went from surprise to a blissful smile.
"It's so nice and gooey..." she nodded. "I didn't expect it to be sweet, but it's really good."
"Good; looks like I haven't lost my touch." Natalie chuckled going back to stirring carefully in the large pot. "I made enough for everyone here. It should taste even better when it's cooled down."
"I can't wait! Oh, but you should go change if you were planning to wear anything else tonight. You and the Captain are going to be the main attraction on the dance floor."
"Bold of you to assume Levi would ever be caught doing that. He'd rather roll around naked in the mud, I assure you."
"I had no idea that's the kind of fantasy you have about me."
The young Ackerman's amused voice startled both of them into looking at him as he leaned in the doorway with his arms crossed. To her credit, Natalie had just finished preparing the pudding and managed to cover the pot before he could see it.
"It wouldn't be the weirdest thought I've ever had about you." she retorted without missing a beat, prompting him to arch a brow.
"Speaking of thoughts... are you thinking of spending the entire night in the kitchen?"
"Maybe... why?"
"Because I want some attention tonight."
While Natalie's reply had been in good humor, the seriousness in his tone left her hopelessly blushing while Sasha hurried out of the room trying – and failing – to hide her grin.
"You shouldn't say things like that around them... it'll make them uncomfortable." the redhead scolded him.
"I need some entertainment once in a while, since I'm stuck babysitting these brats."
Given that he had turned sideways to watch as Sasha ushered the two younger girls upstairs to change, the sensation of Natalie kissing his cheek caught him off guard.
"You really do love them, don't you?" she smiled, giggling at his eye roll. "It's alright, you don't have to say it; I can still see it."
He had just opened his mouth to retort, when she kissed his cheek again and walked away leaving him to sigh in amused resignation.
'At least you're getting better.' he mused, grateful that his idea to get her away from the soldier's life for a bit seemed to be working; at the very least she looked better rested and was more energetic than she had been recently.
While before she had usually woken up a few times every night, now it was only happening once. He could only hope that going back to the barracks wouldn't undo all the progress she had made, otherwise, he was resolved to talk to Erwin and find some way to have her retire. He was even resolved to not wait anymore for a peace that they might or might not have been able to achieve. If he had to marry her and have a child with her, to force her to retire from the military, he was resolved to do it. He would do whatever was necessary to make sure she wouldn't break down.
By the time the stars had come out the pasture was filled with laughter and music, though only a few more daring couples had yet to take up the dancing endeavor. Most seemed content for now to sit around the tables, enjoying the food and drinks. Many of the younger ones, however, had gathered around the table where the squad was seated, eager to hear about the battle at Shiganshina. To Natalie's and Levi's relief, Sasha was more than happy to tell their squad's part in the story along with Connie and Jean. But at last, the girl's father intervened to send away their admirers and give them a chance to actually enjoy the cheery atmosphere.
"We should've brought Erwin with us." Natalie stated in jest, poking at her food.
"And put him through this?" Levi retorted with a humorous huff. "I already owe him enough; this would be a lifelong debt."
=0=0=
For some time now, Natalie had been engaged in conversation with Mikasa trying to find out why the girl seemed so nervous and fidgety that night. But with the brunette insisting she was fine, Natalie could only guess by the subtle looks she kept throwing to the dancing people that she'd been hoping Eren would dance with her. However, with the boy nowhere in sight, she had tried goading the girl into finding him and asking him to dance, only to realize Mikasa was far too shy for that.
'Fine... if you won't do it, I will.' the redhead shook her head in amusement.
She'd just gotten to her feet, thinking to find that idiot so she could tell him to stop being an idiot and ask Mikasa to dance, when she was startled to bump straight into Armin as she turned to leave the table.
"Uh... um, I'm sorry." he said hastily, reaching to grab her arms and steady her.
"Don't worry, Armin. Have you seen Eren around?"
"I think he was talking to Connie on the porch." the boy replied, speaking again when she made to leave. "Um! W-would you... I mean..."
Confused as to what he wanted to say, Natalie turned to properly face him barely holding back a chuckle at his reddened cheeks.
"I'm... uh, I was wondering if... y-you'd like to d-dance? I mean... I noticed you haven't danced all evening and I was wondering if... you'd want to try it." he at last blurted out, and internally Natalie felt so incredibly bad for Mikasa whose face said it all.
'I mean... I can just pass by Eren and send him to ask her.' she contemplated for a moment, before reaching to grab Armin's arm and pull him along with her. "Sure! I'd love to!"
Telling him about her plan once they were out of earshot of Mikasa, she and Armin took advantage of the crowd to sneak up to the porch where Eren and Connie were seated, watching the clear sky.
"Where are you two off to?" Connie asked upon seeing them.
"The dancing ring." Natalie winked, before reaching out to tousle Eren's hair. "Speaking of dancing... why are you here and not over there, asking Mikasa to dance?"
"Huh? She wouldn't want to dance..." the boy sputtered when she gestured towards their table.
"What do you mean she wouldn't?" Armin chimed in. "Did you forget she really liked dancing when we were kids? Yes, she's more serious nowadays but I don't think she doesn't like that anymore. You should ask her; I'm sure it would mean a lot to her."
When he hesitated and tried shrinking into his shirt with a blushing pout, Natalie grabbed him by the ear and pulled him to his feet.
"Ow, ow, ow, ow! That really hurts, Natalie!" he complained.
"Then stop being an idiot and go ask her. I mean it... otherwise, I'll just send Jean to dance with her. It'd be a pity for her to spend the whole night sitting down. Even Sasha's dancing, for crap's sake!"
"Alright, alright! You're tearing my ear off!"
"It'll just grow back, don't worry." she retorted.
Rubbing his ear when she released him, he walked away with a pout heading for the table. Yet upon arriving there and seeing Mikasa nursing a cup of tea as she longingly watched the dancing couples, he felt even worse for not doing it sooner.
'Natalie's right... I really am the biggest idiot sometimes.' he berated himself, walking over to her seat and startling her when he weighed a hand on her shoulder. "Hey... let's dance."
For a moment she only blinked at him as though unable to comprehend his request, before he saw the blush spilling across her face; and he had to wonder why he had never noticed until then just how cute she looked like that.
"I—"
"Come on!" he cut her off, not wanting to give her a chance to refuse. 'I'd rather die than let that horseface dance with you.'
"E-Eren!" she gasped as he pulled her to her feet and towards the dancing ring. "Wait, I..."
Before she could get a chance to gather her thoughts, she found herself face to face with him among the dancing couples. And then when he stepped forth to wrap an arm about her waist and pull her even closer, her mind blanked and the music was drowned by her heartbeat.
"Eren, I don't know the steps..." she mumbled, barely even remembering how to speak.
"Well I don't either, but that never stopped us before, did it?" he grinned cheekily, though Mikasa could swear she saw a hint of blush coloring his cheeks. "Just go with it; don't think."
She barely had enough time to put a hand on his shoulder when he swept her up in the lively rhythm, and the world around them became a blur of colors. At first, she couldn't even hear the music, completely lost in the moment: in his smiling eyes, in the firmness of his hand on the back of her waist, in the way he squeezed her fingers as they weaved between the other pairs. Then finally a surge of happiness overtook her and she found herself smiling back at him. It was so strange... it felt just as it had whenever they would dance together as kids, and yet it was a completely new experience – like they were the same, yet different people. Gradually her heartbeat settled as she grew used to the new closeness between them, and she could now clearly hear the music and the laughter, could clearly see the other dancers around them – at one point she could have sworn she'd spotted Natalie and Armin nearby.
"Great job, Armin!" the redhead grinned, seeing Eren and Mikasa passing by them during the dance.
"Well... it's not like it wasn't true." he replied with a timid chuckle. "Hannes-san and the other guards used to play music sometimes when they were lazing about. Eren and I would always find Mikasa there, dancing for them. They used to dance together fairly often back then; it was always great fun to watch."
Blinking as he realized he'd gone off on a tangent, he offered her an apologetic smile.
"Sorry... I didn't mean to talk so much..."
"Don't be silly. It's always good to hear about nice things like that."
He would have replied, but as they passed by the edge of the ring again he spotted Levi seated at their table with Sasha's father, watching them. With how fast they were moving he couldn't properly read the expression on the young Captain's face, but he dearly hoped he hadn't overstepped his boundaries.
"Looks like she's feelin' better these days." the older man smiled.
"I think she is; at the very least she's sleeping better." Levi agreed. "I'm hoping she'll keep getting better even after we go back."
"I'm sure she will when she's got a good man like ye at 'er side."
With the music at last winding down for the moment and the dancers joining the rest of the crowd in applause, he watched as Natalie and Armin returned to the table soon followed by Eren and Mikasa.
=0=0=
"Huh? Where's Levi?" the redhead inquired as she approached the table with the tray of desserts.
"He said he wanted a bit of quiet." Mikasa replied, gesturing towards the forest just at the edge of the field.
"Figures he'd leave just when I'm trying to do something nice for him. Well, here... I hope you'll all like it."
"What is that?" Eren scrunched up his face in confusion when she set the tray down.
"Dessert. Help yourselves, there's enough for everyone."
"I've been waiting for this all night!" Sasha grinned, hurrying to grab a bowl and a spoon.
"So what is it actually?" Jean asked, poking at it with his spoon.
"It's rice pudding; I haven't made this in years, since before you all joined the Survey Corps." Natalie replied with a wistful smile, looking over all of them. "The last time I made it, was after my brother's death. I'd been having a really hard time accepting that he was gone, and I'd treated my squad very poorly for months. But they never gave up on me... and neither did Levi. So I wanted to apologize to them somehow. I'm glad I could make it for a happier occasion, for my new squad. Think of it as... my thanks for everything you've done; for how much you've helped both Levi and me after we lost our team. For how smart and gentle you all are..."
At that she reached over to gently tousle Armin's hair, looking past him afterward to Mikasa.
"For how skilled and loyal you all are..." she continued, her gaze trailing over to Eren. "For how brave and strong you all are. I know Levi isn't good with words, but you can be sure that he feels the same as I do about you. We both would've been in a much darker place without all of you on our team."
"Geez, enough... you're gonna make me cry." Jean retorted, trying to mask a sniffle by scratching his nose.
"I mean that's what a team is for, right?" Connie replied. "Without you and the Captain, most of us would probably not even be here tonight."
Though she smiled at that, the redhead said nothing more only picking up the last bowl and teaspoon and walking off to let them enjoy the treat. Heading out to where Mikasa had directed her, she slipped into the shadows beneath the trees. After a few dozen steps she at last came to a small clearing, finding Levi seated on a log watching the moon with only the buzzing of nightly insects and the dull hum of slow music to fill the silence.
When she stepped into the grass sprinkled with white flowers, he noticed the bright yellow shawl draped over her shoulders and turned his eyes to her.
"Running away fro—?" she began in jest, silenced when he raised a finger to his lips.
When he stood and reached out to her, she approached and placed her hand in his, a curious twinkle playing in her gaze. With the other one, he took the bowl from her and set it down onto the log, before moving her arms around his neck and wrapping both of his about her waist to pull her flush against him. With how his eyes were shining so mesmerizingly in the moonlight, it took her a minute to realize they were swaying to the rhythm of the music. And she could only laugh when she understood he had intentionally wanted them to be alone, so he could dance with her. Wrapping her arms properly around his neck, she leaned her forehead against his and closed her eyes to let him sweep her up into his pace.
"Thank you..." she whispered. "If I'd known, I would've worn a better dre—"
"You're already perfect." he interjected.
Squeezing her a bit tighter and leaning back just enough so he could press a kiss to her forehead, he rested his cheek against her skin when she lowered her head onto his shoulder. It seemed like forever since they had been able to truly share such a tender moment, where they were again in their own world, where there was only them. And as they swayed together, long after the music had quieted down and they'd been left with only the crickets to serenade them, he found himself recalling things he hadn't thought of in such a long time.
Never had Hange's words rung more true than they did now, it seemed to him. Natalie really had survived some of the most impossible odds for his sake. He wasn't alone in that hellish world, he had that someone that so many people never found in their lifetimes; and she was such a beautiful human being... and she was his.
Sooo today's replies for my lovely reviewers :D
1. MordredVisor - As always love, thank you so much for taking the time to leave feedback! And please don't ever apologize for being busy! Real life isn't always fun, but it always comes first. The story will always be here when you have the free time to check it out :D
(ch. 33) - Yes, he proposed! Haha I was trying not to spoil that this was coming, hence my attempt at a cryptic reply when you last mentioned them getting married. As for Natalie, it wasn't so much that she didn't care about marriage, because she did. She did want to marry him, because for her that's what she was raised to know was the normal outcome for a couple. So it wasn't that she didn't want it, or didn't care about it. She just had enough empathy to put herself in Levi's shoes and try to see things from his perspective. And she thought he wouldn't ever want or need a paper, or a ring, to say that she belongs to him and that he belongs to her. So that's why she didn't say anything to him and settled for leaving it as just a nice little daydream of sorts.
But, as we all know Levi is nothing if not caring and empathetic just like Natalie is. And the reason he did propose to her, as he said, was because he knew it was important to her (thus, it became important to him as well). He didn't do it because he needed to be married to her, because he never felt any need for official validation for their feelings or their relationship. He always knew that she loved him and that he loved her and it was enough for him. But finding out that she did consider that important is what made him decide that he would go through with it, for her sake. Without spoiling anything, it'll be made apparent in a more direct way in the following chapters just how much Natalie means to Levi, so keep an eye out for that ;)
Now moving on to Erwin, it was imperative that he did at least one transformation before he was put in a situation where he NEEDED to turn. Because, as we've seen with Eren, Titan shifters have some trouble controlling their Titans during the first transformation. So I figured that the deserted beach was the perfect place for him to test it out, because no one would see it. So he got to do a test-run on his powers and is still Paradis' secret weapon.
So these are my replies for today. Cheers, lovelies~ ( ˘ ³˘)❤