Who Will Go?
That Saturday, Robert purposely walked Isis by the home of the most trustworthy man he knew. Mathew. The only man worthy to escort Mary and Edith to Ireland.
He hadn't seen Mathew since Lavinia's funeral, which was understandable, but Robert hoped the young man still understood he was an important part of his family. He knocked on softly on the door of Crawley House while Isis gave a short bark.
Their butler, Molesley answered the door with a smile. "Hello, milord. Do come inside, please." He opened the door wider, so Robert could step into the cottage.
But Robert shook his head. "No, I do not need to come inside. I was just hoping Mr. Crawley would be available for a walk today."
Molesley nodded his balding head and disappeared. A few moments Mathew appeared at the door. He wore a proper suit, and his blond hair was neatly combed, but Robert worried he may be a bit too thin.
Was it the lingering effects of his spinal injury or Lavinia's death? Perhaps they should stop at the bakery during their walk. "I'm pleased to see you today," Robert said honestly. "Perhaps I should have come by sooner, but I've had so much…" he shook his head thinking of how complicated his life was now. Bates' arrest and struggle to make bail, his distant relationship with Cora, and most of all, Sybil's inappropriate wedding plans.
"Don't worry about it, Robert," Mathew said causally as they began walking down the path, Isis beside them. "I could have come to the House if I wished."
Robert nodded. Of course, the young man wished to be alone after his fiancée died. Robert's heart constricted at the mere thought of losing his Cora for good. Thinking of his wife reminded Robert of why he'd come to speak to Mathew. He took a deep breath, savoring the warm summer air.
"Sybil has given us an invitation to her wedding," he said carefully, as his body tightened at the mere prospect. He paused and watched Isis as she innocently sniffed a nearby bush. Robert wished he could have the tiny difficulties that his dog had. "It's seems it's very important to Cora that our family be represented at that wedding." He practically spat out the last word, still fuming that his youngest daughter had chosen to marry an Irishman. "So, I thought you perhaps you could escort Mary and Edith to this wedding."
Mathew didn't answer for several moments, and the silence made Robert feel more and more uncomfortable. Flies swarmed in his stomach as he waited for a reply.
"I think it is nice that you wish for Mary and Edith to go to Sybil's wedding," Mathew said carefully. Too carefully. More flies swarmed. "But I'm afraid it's not the right time for me to be traveling."
It was a reasonable answer. After all, Mathew had only just begun walking fully again a little over a month ago. But Robert's temper snapped at that response, just as it did constantly these days. "Right time!" he said, a bit too loudly for an earl where any of the tenants might hear. "That has nothing to do with it. It was never 'right,' but Sybil is marrying him anyway. If my daughters must go to this wedding, I need a trustworthy man to take them there."
Mathew sighed. "I appreciate your trust in me, Robert. It means a lot to me. And you know I love all the family. But with Lavinia… and everything I have to organize now…" He shook his head. "I cannot."
Robert sighed, trying to behave like a proper earl again. Of course, Mathew was still recovering from Lavinia's death. And he certainly wasn't going to beg the younger man. He patted Isis's head. "I understand, and I apologize for insisting it so rudely. I don't know what's come over me lately."
But now that Mathew had said it wasn't possible, certainly Cora would understand the girls couldn't' attend Sybil's wedding. There was no other man he would trust with his daughter's welfare.
Mathew shrugged his shoulders slightly as they continued walking. "But I think it's great gesture to allow Mary and Edith to go to Ireland for the wedding," he said, almost as if he knew what Robert was thinking and wished to make him feel guilty. "Especially as I remember your response when they announced their plans to marry."
Robert nodded, not wishing to remember that moment either. "How would you like to walk toward the bakery today?" he said causally, recalling his plan to help Mathew gain some weight.
Mathew didn't answer but turned toward the direction of the bakery.
OOOOOOOOOOO
Robert spent much of the day with Mathew, recalling exactly why the young man was so wonderful. Once again, he asked Mathew if he might join the rest of the family for dinner tonight.
But Mathew sighed and shook his head. "I appreciate the offer, Robert, but I cannot right now. I should be going home; Mother will be waiting for me." With that, he turned toward Crawley House. Obviously, the young man was still mourning Lavinia.
Still, Robert turned toward his own home, feeling as if he was missing another important member of his family.
OOOOOOOOOOO
Nevertheless, he enjoyed dinner with the family that was there for the next couple of nights. And Robert particularly appreciated that Cora was able to have after dinner beverages with everyone. It wasn't that long ago when she was still so tired that she retired to bed as soon as dinner finished.
Watching her sit on the drawing room settee and sip her tea filled Robert's heart with joy, and he truly hoped it was a step in the right direction for their relationship. "I spoke to Mathew about escorting Mary and Edith to Sybil's wedding," he said quietly to Cora a couple of evenings after he'd conversed with the young man. "But he told me that he couldn't be traveling right now, and he was still mourning Lavinia."
He sighed, and looked towards Mary and Edith, who were squabbling about something. "So, I afraid Mary and Edith won't be able to go to Sybil's wedding, after all."
"Why should that mean Mary and Edith cannot attend Sybil's wedding, Robert?" Cora asked, her words as clipped as they were yesterday morning. "Certainly, there are other options. As Mary is engaged to Richard Carlisle, I would think he would be the perfect escort. Why don't you ask him?"
Robert stared at her for a moment, wondering how that could even occur to her. "Cora, if I allow my unmarried daughters into a dangerous and unstable territory, it needs to be with a man I trust. Not with a smug man who's going to be more interested in collecting information in Ireland for his own papers than in taking care of our girls."
He shook his head and put down his teacup a bit too hastily for an earl. But she was being so foolish.
"Robert, Richard Carlisle is a nice enough man," Cora's voice said with a sigh. "He has been knighted by the king, which I think should mean something to you, and he has done so much for Mary already. Isn't it great that he's bought the estate next door to us so Mary will always be close to Downton? He will be part of this family soon, and that means he needs to be invited to events like family weddings."
Robert fumed again, becoming so cross he couldn't see properly. "Cora, Sybil's wedding isn't a 'family event'; it's an inappropriate marriage that truly shouldn't be happening. And don't begin speaking of what Carlisle has done to that estate." He shook his head, thinking of how Carlisle had ruined Haxby's traditional charm with all his modernizations.
"Well, like it or not, Robert, Sybil's wedding is happening, and she is still a part of our family, so her wedding is a 'family event.'" Cora said as her voice became icy cold. "I ache for her, but I'm trying to accept that I won't attend her wedding. I need to know she is happy and safe in some way. I love her too much to do otherwise."
With that, she placed her teacup on the table and stood. She had the same expression on her face that he hadn't recognized during their row yesterday. Robert was beginning to think that it meant she was extremely cross. "I'm going upstairs, but don't follow me. I don't wish to see you at all until tomorrow, at the earliest."
With that Cora left the drawing room. Mary and Edith stared at their mother as she left, leaving the entire room silent.
OOOOOOOOOO
Rolling over on the other side of the narrow bed a couple of hours later, Robert tried again to sleep in his silent dressing room. But naturally, it was no use. The bed was too small, the room was barely hospitable, and there were no soft noises of anyone else's presence.
To make matters more terrible, this room reminded Robert far too much of Jane. This was the room where he'd brought the poor sweet maid into, kissing her desperately. In fact, he could almost still feel the young widow's lips on his. What was worse was he'd planned on doing far more than kissing.
He shook his head violently against his awkward pillow, trying to remove the dishonorable thoughts from his head.
Still, thinking of Cora wasn't much better. How could she believe that smug Richard Carlisle could escort Mary and Edith to Ireland? He seemed to be obsessed with showing off how much money he had and how eager he was to be united with the Crawley family, and he worked with newspapers, making his living by telling other people's secrets.
Robert couldn't trust that man further than he could throw him. He still couldn't believe that jerk was engaged to Mary. He could still see Carlisle lifting his hat as he said goodbye, with his eyes looking too smug, as if he had power over everyone. Granted, he was rather wealthy, and an Englishman, so Robert knew he was scores better than Branson. But Carlisle wasn't good enough for Mary, and certainly not enough to trust his unmarried daughters in Ireland.
His chest tightened at the thought of his girls in such a dangerous place as he rolled over once again. Images of the drunken louts that filled that place flashed through his mind before he could stop them, doing who knows what to his daughters. And what of all the cowards in Ireland, trying to wage war against England?
That nonsense in Ireland was exactly why Bates couldn't be released on bail yet, no matter how many times Robert asked.
Why couldn't Mathew have agreed? Robert knew Mathew would've watched over Mary and Edith closely, and even kept an eye on Sybil, despite how rebellious the girl could be. After all, Sybil was fond of Mathew, too. And if Mary and Mathew had grown closer because of the trip, and Mary decided to wed him instead of Carlisle, what was the harm in that? It could've been the one good part of Sybil's wedding in Ireland.
Sighing, Robert remembered Mathew's sorrowful, sincere face as he'd told Robert "no" today, and he felt guilty once again. Mathew had still only recently lost his fiancée, and it was unfair of Robert to expect him to travel if he wasn't able to do so.
There was no way Mary and Edith could go to the wedding if Mathew couldn't escort them; why didn't Cora understand that? She was normally so great at understanding him, even things he couldn't explain. Robert already explained how dangerous Ireland was, and how he needed someone he trusted to go with them.
And yet, Cora had refused to listen. Did she begin to comprehend how inappropriate Sybil's wedding to Branson was? Would she ever try to understand him again? Would they ever be as close as they once were? Or was Robert destined to live the rest of his life with a cool marriage, spending all his nights in this bloody dressing room?
Jane's phantom lips touched his again, as he ached for someone to comfort him, but Robert shoved them away from his mind.
Robert rolled over again, staring at the dark ceiling, remembering Cora's words tonight about how much she loved Sybil. Could she possibly think Robert didn't love their youngest girl? After he'd given Sybil his blessing to go to Ireland and marry Branson, and even gave some money and the use of his motor, despite how many times Sybil stabbed and stomped on Robert's heart as she insisted on marrying the Irishman. Despite what a laughingstock he'd be in the House of Lords for doing so.
Despite his own father's lecture in his head on how inappropriate Robert was being.
On the contrary, his heart desperately wished to pull Sybil back to Downton and into the safety of his arms. But that wasn't an option, and there wasn't anything he could do about it. Still, Robert could refuse to allow his other daughters go to that dangerous, unstable place.
And yet, this dressing room was somehow dangerous and unstable, too, as memories of Jane continued to dance through Robert's subconscious, once again breaking free into phantom images of the former maid, smiling at him.
Standing up, he grasped his pillow and a blanket and headed down to the library. Certainly, that room would be safer for him. But tomorrow, something had to change.
OOOOOOOOOOO
Waking up just as the sun rose, Robert groaned at his sore back. The library settee wasn't meant for sleeping, at least not for him. The number of changes he was expected to accept these days, both physical and emotional still overwhelmed him. He grumbled again as he picked his pillow and blanket.
Still, Robert hurried back to the dressing room before Carson stirred. Sleeping in his dressing room would cause enough gossip between the servants; he didn't want to think of the talk if they knew he'd slept in the library.
Obviously, Cora's additude concerning Sybil and Branson was because of her Americanism, and that was completely unacceptable here. Still, from her perspective, Robert supposed she might just be trying to show her loyalty to their family.
That same deep loyalty he'd always loved about her.
And speaking of unacceptable, how was what he'd done with, and to Jane acceptable? Given the night he'd suffered, Robert knew he still had a lot to make up for his mistake.
He'd start by finding another worthy gentleman to escort Mary and Edith to Sybil's wedding. Mathew would have been ideal, but there were others that would be suitable.
Reaching the dressing room just before Carson knocked, Robert smiled and placed his bedding back where it belonged. Another one of his shameful secrets was safe. "Come in, Carson," Robert said, taking a deep breath.
OOOOOOOOOOOO
After Carson was forced to play valet because Bates was still unlawfully imprisoned, Robert had breakfast and took a long walk with Isis. All along, he attempted to think of a suitable gentleman to escort Mary and Edith to Ireland. It must be a man who would be wiling to attend such an inappropriate wedding but at the same time honorable enough to take care of his vulnerable daughters.
"Do you know of such a gentleman, Isis?" Robert asked his dog as they walked through the trees. His back was still sore from sleeping on the settee, but he took comfort that with all the changes occurring simultaneously, they were the same trees that grew there when he was a boy.
Isis panted at him, wagging her tail. Then she eagerly began sniffing each tree. Just as she always did. Robert wished everything were so simple.
"If only Mathew would agree to take them. That would be the best option, wouldn't it, girl?" Robert said as Isis kept sniffing.
Sighing, he reminded himself that Mathew had a perfect right to be unable to go because he was mourning Lavinia. He couldn't imagine how painful it must be, to lose a fiancée like that, just days before the wedding.
He needed to find someone else to escort Mary and Edith to see Sybil.
OOOOOOOOOOO
Returning home, Robert picked up the telephone and asked for Evelyn Napier. The young man wasn't as honorable as Mathew, but he was a close friend of the family and had always been quite fond of Mary. He supposed Evelyn could be trusted.
Unfortunately, Evelyn wasn't available. His father, Viscount Branksome informed Robert he was still in France. It seemed the war wasn't quite over for everyone. "I'm sorry to hear that," Robert said with a sigh.
"Don't worry too much, Lord Grantham," the Viscount said firmly. "Evelyn is fine, but some of our soldiers still need help, and my boy is heavily involved in the diplomacy. It sounds rather complicated, but I know he's doing a great thing."
"Indeed," Robert said, nodding even though Viscount Branksome couldn't see him over the telephone. He certainly couldn't fault Evelyn for continuing to use his talents to serve England.
Hanging up the telephone, Robert reviewed all the gentleman he knew, trying once again, to think of a suitable man to take care of Mary and Edith in Ireland. If only so many fine gentlemen weren't killed in the war…
Finally, he rang Lord Wooster, hoping that his son, Jonathan would be able to go. But the baron's response was incredibly disappointing. "You wish my son to escort your daughters to Ireland? For Lady Sybil's wedding to an Irishmen? I mean no disrespect, Lord Grantham, but you do realize how impossible that is."
A few weeks ago, Robert would have agreed with the man wholeheartedly. The very idea that Sybil would marry that… Fenian, a man who used to serve Robert while he seduced his daughter under his nose, made Robert's stomach turn. But today, he refused to hear it.
"I don't see why," Robert said, almost barking his words. "My daughters wish to attend their sister's wedding, so I'm trying to find a way to make that happen. I realize it's impossible for a titled man, but I see no reason why a man such as your son cannot go with the ladies." His heartbeat faster and faster as he became more and more cross.
"Lord Grantham," Lord Wooster said with a sigh, as if Robert was the one being unreasonable.
"That is quite enough," Robert said slamming down the telephone before he could stop himself. Naturally, his temper was still much too short, and sleeping on the settee had not helped.
There had to be a gentleman somewhere in England who could and would escort Mary and Edith to Ireland.
OOOOOOOOOOOOO
Robert tried speaking to Lord Gillingham, also known as John Foyle, but his son, Anthony, informed Robert he was too poorly to even answer the telephone. Naturally that meant his son had to stay nearby.
Before he could attempt to speak to anyone else, it was time for luncheon. It was an awkward meal, as Cora was still sore at him from last night, refusing to meet Robert's eyes over the table at all. Meanwhile, Mary and Edith switched between bickering and giving their parents rather odd looks. Robert could barely taste Mrs. Patmore's expertly crafted cucumber sandwiches.
Between the tense meal, his sore back, and the pressure of finding someone to escort Mary and Edith to Sybil's wedding, Robert had enough. He had to do something.
Picking up the telephone one more time, Robert's heartbeat faster again for quite a different reason. He asked the operator for the number of Sir Richard Carlisle's office.
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
OOOOOOOO
Ever since Robert had told Cora he wouldn't allow Mary and Edith to attend Sybil's wedding without Mathew escorting them, Cora had been in a fog full of hurt. She couldn't even look at Robert during luncheon and she'd escaped to Rippon for the entire afternoon.
But now she'd returned for dinner, and the fog of hurt was even more intense. Especially as Robert stood next to her in the drawing room while they waited for dinner.
"Mary, Edith I've arranged for Richard Carlisle to take you to Ireland for Sybil's wedding," he suddenly said, cutting straight through Cora's fog, leaving her completely shocked.
"Oh, Papa, that's so wonderful of you," Mary said, walking directly to him to look him in the eye. "I know it's difficult, but I really need to see her again before she marries."
Still recovering from the shock of Robert's announcement, Cora finally looked at her husband for the first time since last night. His face shone of love. For Mary and Edith, and even for Sybil, as much as he still struggled to accept her decision. And for Cora.
"So, I'm to play chaperone for two happy engaged couples in Ireland?" Edith sighed, shaking her head.
"If you could actually manage to catch a man, perhaps you wouldn't need to do so," Mary said calmly, but with the air of dismissal she'd always used when speaking to Edith.
Cora thought about saying that since the war had finally ended, social events should be starting again and perhaps she could find a nice gentleman in the next few months. But before she could do so, Robert sighed. "You will be a chaperone for Mary and Sir Richard, Edith, but more importantly, he will make certain you are all safe. Ireland is unstable at the moment, and I'm afraid it might be dangerous."
Cora's heart clenched with worry about Sybil as Robert mentioned the dangers in Ireland again. Her youngest daughter had already been there for over three weeks, and she intended to live there permanently.
Just then, Carson entered the drawing room, bowing as he did so. Their soft chatter and different emotional responses ceased. "Dinner is served," their butler said in his deep voice, just as he always did.
OOOOOOOOOO
Dinner was much more pleasant than luncheon, as Cora's fog of hurt had disappeared, and Mary and Edith even managed to chat semi – pleasantly as they discussed their plans to attend Sybil's wedding.
Robert met Cora's eyes across the table as she nibbled on her chicken, gazing at her with love and an extra expression she couldn't place. She smiled back, overjoyed he finally decided to love Sybil enough to allow some of her family at her wedding. Not only that, but he realized what a fine gentleman Sir Richard was and how appropriate it was for Mary's fiancée to attend such an event.
Still, Cora wished she understood the subtle look in his eyes underneath his love. It ate at her heart that she could no longer read Robert's face and body language like a favorite novel. Trying to focus on Mary and Edith's happy chatter, Cora took another bite of chicken.
But she couldn't help but sneak glances at Robert.
OOOOOOOOOOO
"… And I will definitely wear my blue day dress for the wedding," Mary said in the drawing room while Robert had a cigar. Meanwhile, Cora and her two older daughters continued speaking of wedding plans.
"That sounds wonderful," Cora said, knowing exactly what dress Mary had in mind. It was a medium blue silk dress that suited Mary's coloring well. Still, pain gnawed at Cora's heart, wishing she could be choosing her own dress to wear to Sybil's wedding.
Edith sighed. "Then I suppose I shouldn't wear my blue dress. Perhaps the pink floral one instead."
Mary sighed in return, obviously annoyed, but at least she didn't snap at her sister in response. Of course, their love for Sybil was the one thing that had always united them.
Just then the door opened, and Cora immeadiately looked at Robert, studying his face, trying to understand the hidden meaning. As he met her smile, his gaze tender but his eyes questioning just a bit, she finally remembered.
It was the way Robert looked when he was searching for approval. It rarely appeared on his face, as her Robert was stubborn and used to getting his way, especially after he became the earl. In fact, the only two people he ever looked at that way were his Papa and Cora.
The knowledge welled up inside her as Robert sat down on the settee while Mary and Edith continued to discuss their plans for Sybil's wedding. She felt valued. Incredibly valued. Returning Robert's gaze, she smiled, thinking of how endearing his eyes were when he looked like that. Then she purposely sat next to him and nodded slowly, hoping he understood.
She approved of what he did tonight. For Sybil. For Mary and Edith. And behind it all, for Cora as well.
OOOOOOOOOOO
For the next two weeks, Robert discussed the arrangements for Mary and Edith's trip. He bought train and boat tickets, he booked rooms at a hotel in Dublin, and he spoke of when Sir Richard would arrive at Downton.
Meanwhile, Cora fluctuated between appreciating that her Robert was allowing the girls to go, and anger and pain that she would not be going as well. A couple of afternoons, she retreated to the quiet drawing room while the rest of the house was a flurry of orders and activity. There, Cora embroidered a special handkerchief for her Sybil with her married name stitched on to it.
It didn't make up for not attending her wedding, but it was something to celebrate Sybil's marriage. Certainly, her daughter would appreciate it, wouldn't she? Her mind briefly flashed back to Sybil, rejecting all the perfume, make – up, and jewelry she'd been given before she'd left Downton.
Studying the light green embroidery thread that had already stitched "Sybil." Cora continued, beginning the name "Branson." Her daughter would understand the sentiment that the handkerchief was given. Of all her children, Sybil always understood Cora the best. And she had agreed to take that one brooch, to remember them all by.
Still, as the day approached when they would leave, Cora knew her tiny gift wasn't enough. Would Sybil truly understand why Cora wasn't at the wedding? Would her daughter begin to comprehend how much Cora wished to be there? How cross she still was at Robert for being so narrow – minded? How she would have gone no matter what Robert said if it weren't for the fragile state of their marriage?
The day before they left, Cora finally penned a letter, explaining the circumstances. *
OOOOOOOOOO
The next day, Cora watched as Mary, Sybil, and Sir Richard Carlisle prepared to climb into the motor for their journey. "Please give Sybil this small gift from me," Cora told Mary softly, handing her the package which included the handkerchief and letter.
"Yes, Mama," Mary said in her prim way.
"And you'll have to tell me everything about the wedding," she said, looking from Mary to Edith and back to Mary again. "What the church looked like, Sybil's dress, the people who were there…all of it." Cora said, anger welling up inside her again that she was not going.
"Yes, Mama," Mary said again, almost rolling her eyes. She probably wished her mother wasn't so sentimental again, but Cora couldn't help it. Especially not today.
"We will, Lady Grantham," Sir Richard said as well, lifting his hat in response, as he often did. It was nice that Robert had finally accepted Sir Richard was the perfect gentleman to escort their daughters to Ireland. And of course, he'd agreed right away; Sir Richard had already shown he would do anything to please Mary and take care of her.
Taking a deep breathe, Cora reminded herself that if anyone was to blame that she couldn't attend Sybil's wedding, it was herself. If only she hadn't neglected Robert so much during the past year…
Then she embraced both Mary and Edith tightly as Mary sighed, "Mama." And the three of them climbed into the motor.
Finally, she turned to look at Robert, who had stayed silent during the entire exchange. At least he didn't block the way of the motor this time. But as she studied him closer, Cora realized his stance was all wrong. His shoulders were slightly slummed, and his eyes were down; it was as if he were uncomfortable in his own skin.
Automatically reaching her hand to his arm to comfort him, she reminded herself how difficult this was for him. Not only had Sybil chose to wed an Irish servant, the worst possible choice as far as he was concerned, but it happened on top of so many other changes. One after another.
As Cora had written to Sybil, Robert hated change; he always had, and he needed Cora to guide him through them. But she'd done nothing to ease him into any of these changes since they'd begun.
Certainly, with Cora's help, he'd eventually accept Mr. Branson as a full member of their clan. After all he was always so loyal to their family.
His eyes met hers as soon as he noticed her touch, and he managed a smile. It reminded Cora that she needed him, too. "Would you like to go into the library and read a bit of Morte d'Arthur? It was a novel they'd begun reading before the war started but had been forgotten over the past few years.
Robert paused for several moments, and Cora's heartbeat faster, wondering if he would reject her. But finally, he nodded.
And as they turned to go inside, she felt him grasp her arm himself. Almost as if she were a lifeline.
*Cora's letter can be found in chapter four of my story "Love and Freedom." (Both stories exist in the same universe, and I'm trying to write them, so they complement each other.) A more abridged version of said letter can also be found in my first DA fic, "The Letter." Both stories are written from Sybil's POV.