Note: Hi! So this is a long long chapter. Sorry about that, the next ones will be shorter. It took me a long time to write this one, even longer to edit it. Thank you everyone for the support, I wasn't expecting actually. Hope I can keep your interest going, I realize stories where Aerith "comes back" can be hard to like I guess… I'm really out of my comfort zone, but there's still a lot to come.
Warning for spoilers of the OG and language here, because Cid…
It's as if he's walking on ice over water and he needs to take careful steps not to apply too much pressure or walk through a thinner layer, afraid the ice will shatter like glass under his foot and he'll fall into the abyss.
They arrive at Edge just when the bustling of people leaving for their jobs and chores starts. Aerith looks around the streets amazed at how quickly they were able to build a city from scratch. It is far from being something close to what Midgar had been, it wasn't the intention, the houses are smaller, the neighborhoods warm and organized, a welcoming place to start a new life, unlike the soulless metallurgic mountain of buildings that had once been so familiar to them.
A lot is still incomplete, but it is already developed enough people could start having their own routines, though the unfinished side of the city is full of improvised shelters for those who don't have their houses built yet.
Cloud parks his bike under the stairs that take him up to his room complex. While he detaches his sword from the bike's compartment, a perplexed Aerith stares around the street, absorbing all of the activity, watching as it gets alive with color and movement.
"Oooh what's that?" She asks no one in specific as she looks up at a long thin pole in front of a small wooden house with tiny squared windows painted yellow and blue.
"We raise a white flag here to let people know our business is open." An elderly man with a mustache informs her at her side.
"Oh I see. We didn't have these in the slums." She says casually, continuing the conversation with the stranger.
"Aerith!" Cloud calls in alarm as he reaches her and pulls her away from the man. "People may recognize you. We should lay low for a while, just until I figure things out… about you."
"Oh?" She tilts her head.
"It's…" he pauses, his gaze drifts over her lively eyes, taken aback by how unearthly beautiful she looks under the morning glow. He had spent almost a whole year deprived of her physical presence, and though her features had been long engraved in his mind, when she's standing right in front of him, in faithful color, bright gleaming eyes, it sends him back to that first time he ever laid eyes on her and his heart skipped one or two beats. "It's all very confusing, if someone who knows you sees you, it may be a little overwhelming to them. May start a fuss or call unwanted attention." Cloud knows they wouldn't be stupid enough to try anything, but the Turks had been seen lurking around and the last thing they need right now is having to deal with them.
"I guess you're right." She says, her smile fades a little but the glimmer of her eyes doesn't. "I'm eager to see everyone again."
"I know." He places his hands on her shoulders, squeezes reassuringly. "We'll get there. But let's take it slow, even for you."
She nods, her wide smile returns to her lips. "So, are you taking me home?"
The question disarms him. He has to take her somewhere. The idea of her calling it a home makes his face warm up and he looks away from the intense mischief of her smile. Her witty personality was back with her alright.
And he knows his room is not exactly a fancy accommodation, not to mention spacious enough for two people to live in - it will be a little cramped - she certainly deserves to be someplace more comfortable, but for now, it will have to do.
"Y-yeah." He stutters in shaky resolve.
"Oooh!" She rocks on her feet, takes the swing to lean a little closer.
He clears his throat. "It's only provisory. I promise I'll find some place better for you."
"You mean for us." She says matter-of-factly, a strict conclusion to her. "I'm sure it'll be fine." She continues. "Wherever you are, that's where I want to be."
He stops and stares at her, silently. His heart twists in his chest, the warmth in her words leaves his legs numb and his tongue dry of a reply. Whatever he had done to have her back, he surely can't believe the luck he was given. With an urgent need to close the distance between them - but knowing in his heart he would never - he glances around making sure no one is watching them and takes her hand to pull her up the stairs, across the porch, into the door of his room.
It's dark inside, lonesome, almost forsaken, the only window across from them and close to the bed is shut, it turns the air a smothering heaviness.
One thing she notices is the lack of anything that makes it a home. No photos, no objects, nothing personal. Just a plain wooden wardrobe, a square empty table and chair, a single bed and another door leading to the bathroom. There were white curtains drawn on the window and that was it for decoration. It's as if no one lives there and they're renting the place for the night.
"You've lived here for a whole year?" She asks in awe, the sad emptiness of the room bleeds into her heart.
"If you can call it living." He says while rolling up the shutters on the window, letting the light greet the room and the air lift the stiffness, tries to make it a little more pleasant though he's aware it's hard to. He sets his sword on its usual place against the wall.
She winces at his remark and he catches the rueful look on her face. The reality of his loneliness strikes at her coldly.
"I…" he starts. "I haven't been in a good place with you gone." His eyes are distant, deprived of emotion as they travel back to the hollow life he has had after she had died. It feels strange, thinking about it that way now that she's there.
"I wish I hadn't…" her voice dispels into a whisper as her gaze drops to the ground. The words get lost in the bitterness of her departure.
"Hey." He doesn't think when he reaches for her, bare fingers lift her chin up to cradle her cheek in his covered palm. He holds her face carefully, afraid she'll break under his touch. Blue eyes that glow a light green search the blank emerald of hers. "It's okay now."
But it wasn't. Not when she doesn't know the purpose of her return yet and the ghost of her death fills her with an unyielding doubt she might be called back just like she was sent there. It's a powerful kind of ache in her chest, a mixture of extreme joy she's back and with him but at the same time an excruciating sadness that she might have to leave again, that her return will only be a short passage. It broke him the first time, she can't think of what it will do to him a second one.
"We probably need food." He says and his voice makes the tears she realizes had welled up in her eyes, hold back.
"Probably?" She asks swallowing down the knot in her throat. "I'm starving mister." She's able to cover the tremble of her voice.
Something about the title she uses makes the corners of his lips rise and his chest warm with a feeling he can't quiet name… nostalgia maybe, it's been so long since the day they jumped roofs in the slums. Bodyguard contracts, SOLDIER scouting, the arms of a hero, all of that faded with time.
"I have to take care of that but…" he hesitates. "I can't leave you alone."
"I can come with." She sing-songs. "Promise I'll behave."
"Too risky."
"I'll wear my hair down?"
He raises an eyebrow. The cheekiness of her never ceases to amuse him, it's like they never left the slums.
"You don't happen to have any clothes that'll fit me that are not pink do you?"
"I don't know, I'll have to check." He rolls his eyes. The air feels much lighter.
"Haha. Don't think I haven't noticed the ribbon?"
Confusion flickers over his face and he tilts his arm slightly, self aware of the thin pink band strapped around his bicep, barely covered by his t-shirt sleeve.
"That's right." He grazes his fingers over the fabric's smooth surface. He doesn't need to wear it now, the meaning of it lost the minute she appeared.
As much as he doesn't want to loose sight of her, it's better if she stays inside. "I'll only be a minute." He rushes to the door and his stomach turns with apprehension. "Don't go anywhere." Please.
She nods and as he closes the door, his eyes linger on the bright smile she sends his way.
The second the door clicks to a close, he's washed over by a sense of emptiness that drains all the blood off his face. It's uncomfortable, it's devastating. He needs to hurry back. Fortunately there's a small food stand by the corner of the complex that he uses to get meals from.
Aerith sits down on Cloud's bed, slides her hand through the softness of his sheets. She's not pleased to leave his side either but she understands that until her presence is made known to the people who know her, she shouldn't walk around so easily.
She stands up to push the curtains on the window aside, the view is to a street in the back, more houses and the deserted pastel-cream dry lands they had rode through, in the distance around the new city. She can't help wondering why there is no greenery anywhere, no trees, no plants, no crops, no indication of anything growing or blooming.
Midgar was dry, smog-dark and deprived of plant-life but there were some trees on the streets, as few as they might have been. Not to mention the slums where she grew her flowers. Even the outskirts were filled with weeds growing into the metal roots of the city. She lets the curtain fall thinking it might just be her impression and the lack of perspective the window provided.
She falls back on his bed, wonders about what could have possibly brought her back to the living side of the planet. The last thing she remembers before she met Cloud in the church is a voice. A calm, comforting voice that somehow had eased the pain in her stomach, now a stained numbness.
She presses her hand flat against the place where she had felt the cold metal piercing through her, she's too afraid to take a look. The memory of the blade dripping with her blood blurs her vision. She strains her mind but she can't remember anything else after that, it's only darkness and a suffocating void that starts creeping up her veins, turning her stomach upside down, tightening her chest. Nothing, she feels nothing from the time she had been away, a complete loss of time and space.
She glances at the door, taking short and fast gasps for air, the blood pounding in her ears, heart thudding in her chest and her legs feel so heavy they immobilize her still; Cloud is taking too long. What if she goes outside and tries to find him? Her hands wrap around the skirt of her dress so tightly her knuckles turn bloodless white. It's out of the question, she can't even move from the same place she's sitting on. Desperate tears fall down her cheeks. Hurry back.
As soon as Cloud reaches for the door his mako enhanced abilities alert him something is wrong as he senses the accelerated beat of her heart rate. He quickly tosses the food aside and rushes to her.
"Breathe." He says firmly, his hands land on her shoulders. He bites down on his lip, that seems a little redundant, it's exactly what she's trying to do. He knew he shouldn't have left her alone, and he curses inwardly at his recklessness. His body shakes in anxious alarm as he watches her struggle for air, but he needs to show her he's calm. He takes a deep, slow breath. A strong but graceful hand jumps from her shoulder to her cheek and he strokes her cheekbone with a thumb in a soothing slow rhythm.
"Come on, with me." He pleads and she follows, focusing on him, she takes a shaky breath with him, a long uneven exhale and the vivid blue of his eyes start grounding her back. Brighter than the sky itself, the blue hues of the mako in them reach the tight grip causing her panic. She begins to deepen her breaths as she inhales and exhales at the same time as he does until her heart starts fluttering back to a moderate pace and her lungs even her breathing to normal. He lets out a heavy sigh before he sits next to her in relief. What a stupid thing to do, never again, he won't leave her again, he thinks, he's been too long without her to risk everything so stupidly.
"Thank you." She says weakly, her anxiety now fading as there were no more spiraling thoughts of the nothingness she had experienced. "I tried to remember…"
He locks his arms around her and as he holds her carefully against his chest, he feels the life in hers, blood pumping rhythmically, synchronizing with his own.
"I won't leave you again." He voices his thoughts, the steadiness in his tone cloaking his trembling worry.
They eat the food Cloud had thrown onto the table and afterwards Aerith crawls into Cloud's bed saying she's too tired. She closes her eyes and falls fast asleep, once again.
He spends the rest of his day watching over her, making sure she's breathing slowly and naturally. Eventually, the tiredness of his sleepless night catches up to him and his eyes become too heavy to remain open. His mind too foggy to keep awake. His thoughts start smothering him with visions of the forgotten city and the anxious steps he took to reach her while green eyes aglow descend from the sky. His head falls to his hands, a migraine mildly pounding, he grits his teeth. She's here, he screams silently at himself. He lays down next to her, if he's going to sleep he'll make sure he holds her against him, he'll be able to notice if there are any changes about her if he's close.
Laying an arm over her waist, his fingers intertwine in hers and he buries his face in her hair. She's warm and smells of flowers. It soothes the ache in his heart. He tries to fight his eyes, afraid the moment he wakes the day had been nothing but another dream but though his mind begs for him to hold on, the scent of lillies lulls him into a deep sleep he hasn't had in years.
He tries to swim up but the ice thickens above him and he drowns before he can come out for air.
Cloud wakes up in a jolt the next morning, eyes opening wide being dragged from his sleep by the agonizing fear for her absence. But she shifts softly next to him and all of his muscles relax as he watches her sleeping peacefully, close, so close he feels her warm even breath on his chin, her bare feet brush his legs. It's safe there under the covers with her, an uncommon feeling of comfort, different to what he had known until now. He runs a hand through his hair, rubs his eyes and sits up on his edge of the bed. A gentle knock on the door steers his gaze away from her.
Rushing to it so whoever it was wouldn't insist on knocking, he cracks the door just so that he can peek at who is on the other side.
Ruby eyes narrow slightly in demand for answers.
"Are you in some kind of trouble I should know about?" Tifa folds her arms to her chest, starts tapping her foot impatiently on the wooden floor of the porch. "I mean, you got everyone worried the other night when you barged out of the bar and then you spend a whole day… what? Hiding? Cloud come on!" She tilts her head trying to look into what he's secretly hiding inside his room as he keeps the door almost shut on her.
"Tifa." He quickly sneaks out, barely opening the door enough for him to slide through. "I know I'm a fuck up. But you have to listen to me." He pushes her gently away from the door.
"It's exhausting Cloud, I'm exhausted. I get you're hurting." She sighs heavily. "She was our friend. We're all hurting but—"
"Tifa." Her name comes out in an impatient hiss, he realizes, didn't have to let out so harshly. "I need you to see… someone and tell me you see her too."
"What?" She blinks in confusion. "What are you talking about?"
"Look… either I've gone crazy… I don't know, completely." He fidgets on his feet. "Or this is real." And though he knows it is, he still feels the tight clench around his heart that maybe this could all be a product of his own twisted imagination, and it prevents him from fully acknowledging that this is his new reality.
"You're kinda scaring me here." She places a palm on his cheek. "Do you need me to get you help?"
"I need you to… come inside." He grabs her hand and pulls her back towards his room. He closes the door behind them and the faint morning light slanting through the woven curtains on the window makes the raven-haired woman blink her eyes in adjustment to the dimmed ambience of the small place.
She turns her attention to the slender silhouette of a person sleeping on her side on Cloud's bed. Confusion strikes her like a thunder bolt that Cloud is with someone? The way he had shut down his heart to everyone fills her with an unbelievable curiosity about who could that person be.
The sheets covering her body make it hard for Tifa to make out who she is so she steps closer to the bed. Extending a hand, she pulls the sheets carefully down to take a better look at her face. The second she sees her she drops the bedclothes and claps her hands to her mouth to stop herself from screaming, her eyes open wide in total shock as she steps backwards until there's no more room to cross and her foot bumps against the wall behind her. Of all of the possible people she could have thought of the brief seconds it took her to reach the bed, nothing could have prepared her for that.
She turns to Cloud, her eyes immediately pooling with tears, her hands don't pull away from her mouth.
"So you see her." He whispers quietly watching his friend's reaction.
Tifa drops to her knees next to the bed, lifts a hand to softly brush the Cetra's cheek, her tears now streaming down her face.
"How is this possible?" She murmurs as she rests her chin on the mattress.
The hushed commotion makes Aerith stir gently in her sleep, her eyes flutter and squint in the sunshine streaming softly in through the window, casting light and shadow on the moving shape of a person kneeling at the side of the bed. She sits up rubbing her eyes until they're fully open in quiet awe.
"Aerith." Tifa's quavering voice chokes on a sob. Her shaking legs lift her up and before the green-eyed Cetra could say anything, Tifa wraps her arms around her neck whimpering uncontrollably against her.
Aerith smiles and tightens her arms around her friend's shaking body, she buries her face on Tifa's shoulder while her own eyes fill with tears of joy. They hold each other for a long, long moment of tears, trembling hands and bittersweet laughs.
Tifa pulls back, covers Aerith's cheeks with her palms holding her gaze to her face. Her eyes wide in disbelief.
"How long have you been here?" Tifa asks in between sniffles.
"I met Cloud at the church the night before."
"The night you left the bar?" The raven-haired girl turns to Cloud, sitting back next to Aerith.
He nods.
"But… how?" Tifa asks. The memory of Aerith's body sinking down into the lake still too unbearably vivid in her mind, she reaches for her hand to push the vision away.
"I… I don't know." Aerith shakes her head. "I can't explain what happened."
"This is… this must be some kind of miracle." Tifa's eyes can't stop looking at the Cetra, scanning her every feature, every movement, every inch, in recognition of her friend. "There must be an explanation for this."
"What matters is she's here." Cloud says adamantly.
"Well, yeah… but..."
"Whatever it is, she just got here, we can think about that some other time." Cloud sighs impatiently, he worried this would happen. The minute their friends saw her, they would shower her with questions about her return. It is legitimate, given the situation, but exhausting.
"I'm sure I'll end up discovering why I was given a second chance." Aerith smiles at Tifa. "And when I do, I'll make sure to honor it the best I can."
"I'm sorry if I'm being too insistent on the matter. I don't even have the words to describe… how I feel right now." Tifa squeezes her friend's hand softly, her lips can't stop smiling. "Marlene is going to… oh! When you're ready, come by the new Seventh Heaven. They will all be thrilled to see you again."
"I will! I'm excited to see them too!" Aerith nods, the cheerfulness of their voices echo through the walls.
"I'm kind of in a hurry right now. I just came to check on Cloud." Tifa stands up, looks around the small room. "You know you both can always come stay with us."
"Yeah…" Cloud replies, but the way he looks away so nonchalantly shows them he's not interested in the idea. "Don't tell the others yet. We'll swing by later."
Tifa nods and glances one last time at Aerith, smiles kindly at her, wiping tears away from her face, before leaving them. The room falls back into a quiet silence.
"Question. Did you and Tifa…"
"No! There's nothing there. There never was." He quickly replies, too eager into her unfinished question, his face flushes in awkward discomfort.
"I was going to ask if you guys had a fight or something." She giggles lightly. "But that's nice to know, I guess."
"Sorry, I thought you meant…" he trails off, the wide smile she gives him sends him off-guard, makes him loose his train of thought, he looks away.
"Cloud." She calls in gentle yearning. "Show me your hands."
"Huh?" He mumbles, he had forgotten about his hands. Kneeling on his bed in front of him, she reaches for them, her touch is smooth against the roughness of his. She slowly and carefully unrolls the bandages off his palms, runs delicate fingertips over the blood stained surface of the light fabric.
He winces when she reaches skin and the medical band detaches off of raw flesh. It's worst than he thought, his head wasn't thinking clear the last time he covered the wounds. They're much swollen, bloodier.
"It's from building." He says almost apologetically.
To his surprise, she kisses his palms, slow, grazing her lips over open blisters and purple bruises, leaving silken-soothing traces of warmth on his damaged skin. Almost unbelievably, under the mysterious kind of Aerith's magic, the dark marks on his hands, the disordered cuts across his palms start fading, healing in gentle suppleness as she continues to kiss them better, in every sense of the phrase. The mild pain giving way to regenerated tissue.
He stares at her in utter bewilderment, she amazes him in every way but his muscles tense at how unreal this all seems. One cruel long year she was gone when the next minute she is right there in front of him. Her eyes flit to lock up on his as she holds his hands in hers. A never-ending emerald, bright, caring. If there's any a better time to kiss her… the first night had been an impulse, too long he had ached for her touch, had been deprived of it, same as she had. But now… now he just wants… He bends down, slowly, slowly closes the worlds between them. Heart beating like a ticking bomb. His breath hitches against her warm lips as he brushes them lightly with his; half open gleaming blue eyes don't want to miss an inch of her.
There's no delicate way to let their friends know about Aerith. It defies all logic, the very laws of nature, but logic is something none of them tries to grasp, not in that situation.
"You ready?" Cloud turns to her.
Their hands clasp together tightly as they exchange glances. She takes a long breath building up the courage to climb up the stairs to the entrance.
Tifa is behind the bar when she sees them come in, elbows bent over the counter in eager expectation. As she smiles widely at them, Barret, who sits with his back towards the door, turns around to look at whoever is coming in. They amusedly watch as his jaw drops and he has to lean against the counter not to fall flat off his stool.
"No way!" Marlene shrieks jumping off her chair and runs towards them, arms wide open as she plunges into Aerith's extended arms. The Cetra takes the little girl in her embrace, spinning her around as she happily giggles and tightens her arms around her neck. "I missed you." Her innocence fills Aerith's eyes with tears. She doesn't question or shies away scared, she welcomes Aerith back as if she had been gone a day, as if they'd known each other for years.
"Holy mother of Ifrit's fucking son, fuck me to Corel and back, shit!" Cid's raspy voice interrupts the girls' reunion as Aerith hurriedly presses her hands over Marlene's ears once she placed her back on the floor.
"What he said." Vincent calmly says as both of them walk into the bar. A smile spreads across his lips, something none of them had ever seen.