What Are Friends For?
Virulous slept in, getting up at the ninth hour of the morning. She took a quick shower and dressed in casual attire. Virulous still had some time to kill before she had to get going, so she took the opportunity to take care of household business, paying utility bills, compiling her shopping list; she was running low on household cleaning supplies. After a time, she looked at her wall chronometer and saw that it was the eleventh hour. She sat at her desk and started up her computer.
"Graggo's Eats," she said.
A map display came up marking sixteen locations scattered throughout Kaas City, with hundreds more listed all over the planet. Virulous took in a deep breath and let out a heavy sigh. Then she dialed Andronikos' frequency.
Andronikos' holographic image came up, and he spoke.
"I'm almost to your driveway. I'll be waiting in my speeder. Come on down."
"How did you know…" she started to ask the pirate, but was cut off.
"I'll tell you when you get down here. Let's not talk on holo for now," Andronikos said, cutting the connection.
Virulous became steamed at Andronikos' curt attitude with her.
"I'm really going to let him have a piece of my mind!" she vowed to herself.
Virulous reached the ground floor, and made her way through the lobby of her residential tower. In the driveway were several speeders, including a few taxi droids. A very, very expensive, candy red exotic sports speeder shot right to where she stood.
The passenger side scissor door immediately swung up and Andronikos, wearing stylish sunshades and a black Corellian leather jacket and matching black Corellian leather pants, waived her in, speaking tersely.
"Get in."
Virulous became outraged, and was about to let him have an earful, but Andronikos brusquely cut her off.
"Get in! We don't have all day."
Virulous then noticed that he was constantly checking the mirrors, and looking around. That's when she realized that his voice sounded strained. As she got into the sports speeder, she also noticed that he was shirtless underneath his jacket, sporting two thick gold chains around his neck and draped over his chest.
As she pulled her leg into the speeder and settled into her seat, the door immediately began to swing down, and Andronikos threw the vehicle into a near vertical turning climb, rocketing into the traffic lane of the boulevard in front of her block of buildings.
She immediately searched for and found the seat safety passenger restraining field switch and activated it.
"You're driving like a spice-ridden madman!" she complained, "What's the rush?! It's not like we're late for formation!"
Andronikos gave her a funny look, and as Virulous prepared to explain what formation was, she got another look at his shirtless body and saw that the musculature of his chest and abdomen were well defined. Virulous realized that she was starting to stare and quickly turned her flushed face forward when the pirate spoke.
"I haven't had to worry about being late for formation in a lot of years," he told her, wearing an ironic grin.
His remark reminded her that he used to be a soldier. She turned to look at him again, making a point to look at his face as she listened, but she had to fight her wandering eyes, jerking them back up to his profile as he faced forward, piloting the exotic sports speeder.
Andronikos was an officer in the Galactic Republic Navy. Every morning, precisely at the seventh hour of the morning, he inspected his troops in formation. Those who were late showing up for formation were given unpleasant tasks to perform throughout the remainder of the day, cleaning the freshers, picking up deathstick butts, painting the decorative landscape rocks with whitewash paint.
One day, during formation, he had an epiphany. He realized that he really hated military life. After careful planning and careful recruitment of coconspirators, he staged one of the most spectacular and violent mutinies in Galactic Republic Naval history.
Virulous had heard that he'd deserted, but she didn't know the details and wanted to ask him about it. However, Andronikos immediately got to business, peppering her with questions of his own.
"You got that holo-transceiver you called me with, last night?" he asked, emphasizing, "You got it on you now?"
"Yes, but…," she started to say but was cut off again.
"Give it here. Let me have it."
"What? Why? Who are you planning to call on it?"
"Let me have your damned transceiver! We ain't got all day!" he snapped at the Sith lord. Realizing his mistake, he added, "It's not safe."
Virulous finally realized that something was very wrong, explaining Andronikos' urgent, bizarre and, not to mention, very rude behavior.
"That better be the reason he's acting like bantha poo, or I'm really going to let him have it!" she promised herself, as she handed him her transceiver.
Andronikos spoke a command.
"Autopilot, Graggo's Eats, on The Hill," the pirate said, taking his hands off of the controls.
He then produced a device from an inside pocket of his jacket and activating the device, mashed it against the Sith lord's transceiver. He flipped her transceiver over and mashed it against his device again. When he was done, he opened the driver's side window and tossed her communicator out of it.
"Hey!" Virulous objected, "Why did you…?!"
"Where did you get that transceiver?" Andronikos interrupted.
"I've had it for years," she replied.
Andronikos became incredulous, blurting his amazement, "Years?! Really?!" Then he asked, "Did you do anything to it, recently?"
"I had it serviced, because it started to drop calls," she said.
"Where'd you have it serviced?" he asked.
"It was issued to me when I used to be an officer in the Imperial Reclamation Service. I just kept it when I got out," she said, then demanded to know, "What did you do to it with that thing, and why did you throw it out the window?!"
Virulous already had a bad feeling about what Andronikos was going to give as an answer, but instead he asked another question.
"Have you ever called me from that device before?"
"Yes," she said, becoming greatly annoyed that he hadn't answered her questions.
"Where and when did you get it serviced?" he asked again.
"A few days ago at the Imperial Army 3877th Communications Regiment in The Citadel," Virulous replied, with annoyance starting to edge her tone.
Andronikos had on a look of "Uh oh, we're in trouble," plastered on his face. He asked, with a look of mild dread on his features, "Have you talked to the boss with it since it's been serviced?"
"Yes," she said, with a cold sinking feeling in her gut.
Andronikos shook his head slowly at the Sith lord with a pained expression.
"You better let the boss know. Whatever you and he talked about got spied on by somebody. Somebody with enough pull to make the Imperial Army rig your transceiver is after information on the boss, and they're trying to get it through you."
"We cannot tell the dark lord about this!" Virulous protested, fear starting to gnaw at the growing knot of worry in her stomach.
"The boss has to know about this," Andronikos firmly countered, explaining, "All of your stuff, and all of his stuff has to be checked out for spytech." He added, as though thinking aloud, "I better let Khem know, too. He's got to start security sweeps of everything. Hell, I better have my own crap checked out, too."
By this time, Virulous' stomach was in more knots than her fear could gnaw on by itself, so it invited panic to join it for the worry feast. She realized this meant that her master was going to learn about her squalid living conditions.
"The dark lord cannot know that I live in that dump!" she declared.
Andronikos did a double take of his guest in the passenger seat beside him.
"Dump?" he asked, incredulous, adding, "That place is pretty high class. What are you talking about?"
"It's high class for commoners," she replied, trying to justify what she considered a dump, "but it's nothing like what a Sith lord should be enjoying, especially an apprentice to a dark lord of the Sith."
Virulous shook her head in frustration.
"What is she blowing her money on?" Andronikos asked himself. Aloud he said, "I know plenty of Sith lords who live a lot more humbly than you do, and I don't see them trying to hide it."
"They are not apprentices of dark lords of Sith sitting on the Dark Council! I am!" Virulous stressed, explaining, "It's a matter of perception."
"Maybe you need to ask the boss for a raise," Andronikos suggested.
Virulous turned to look at Andronikos as though he had an odd growth rapidly coming out from his forehead.
"Do you know whether Darth Xalek was on the dark lord's payroll?" she asked, trying to sound casual about it and failing.
"The boss isn't paying you?" Andronikos asked, in quiet disbelief, "You've been working for free all this time?"
Virulous remained silent.
Andronikos did his best to hold back, but it was too much for him, a brief snorting chortle escaped his lips. He turned his face away, but it was too late. He let loose, laughing his ass off. Virulous turned to look out the passenger side window, feeling burned with embarrassment.
"I'd make fun of you," Andronikos said, in a fit of laughter, "but then… but then… but then you'd probably kill me!" he said devolving into another round of raucous laughter. Then aloud to himself, "Oh, Stars! I'm such an idiot! When am I gonna learn to keep my mouth shut?!" he said, devolving into yet another round of raucous laughter.
Andronikos finally got a hold of himself, composing himself and wiping the tears of laughter from his eyes under his sunshades. He started to look out of the windows of the speeder and into the rear view mirrors, verifying their location and that no one was following them.
"We should be at Graggo's place in ten more minutes," he announced taking his datapad from another pocket on the inside of his jacket.
Virulous said nothing, continuing to stare out the passenger window.
"What was it you wanted to talk about?" he asked her, as a way of changing the subject.
Virulous turned from looking out the passenger side window and seriously regarded the pirate as he tapped away on his datapad, but kept silent. Andronikos immediately knew what was on her mind and, setting his datapad on his lap for a brief moment, set out to alleviate her concerns.
"No. I'm done laughing. I got my fill of laughing. Don't sweat it. I ain't gonna laugh no more. I swear it," he said, most solemnly.
"I need a good deal on a humanoid protocol droid," Virulous said, matter-of-factly.
"Really? That's it?" Andronikos asked in mild surprise, "You just wanted my help to get a deal on a droid?"
After a moment to think, he became incredulous that this was all the Sith lord wanted of his considerable talents.
"Alright," Andronikos said, nodding his head to hide his annoyance at having had his schedule disrupted over such a trivial matter. Then he asked, "D'ya need it for contract negotiations, stock market trade, communications and translations, finance management, a personal assistant, personal security?"
"I need one for housekeeping, watering my plants…,"Virulous began to say, but stopped.
She could see that he had entered into a monumental battle to keep from laughing, as his facade tightened to keep it from grinning, but it was a battle which he was quickly losing. He tried to hide his mouth with his hand as though he were thinking, but a solitary snicker finally escaped his lips and then his shoulders began to heave.
"I'm sorry!" he said laughing raucously again, and then promising as his laughter subsided, "I'll treat you to lunch. Order anything you want. It's on me."
"After coming home from Makeb," Virulous began to explain with considerable displeasure, "I found that all of my plants had died and the place was covered in dust."
"You don't have to tell me any of that. I was just over thinking things. I forget that sometimes people just want a droid to take care of the little things," Andronikos said.
The luxury sports speeder exited the expressway traffic lanes, descending to ground level while entering a private traffic pattern just a meter above the ground as it slowed to a leisurely sixty five kilometers per hour, down from its expressway speed of two hundred and forty kilometers per hour. This allowed the passengers to admire the idyllic garden-like forest as they rode up the winding virtual road to the top of the hill.
The manicured forest park was located at the southwestern edge of Kaas City. The speeder slowed even more as it emerged from the well-tended forest-garden into a sprawling luxurious hilltop shopping center.
The hilltop shopping complex, with its famous shops, restaurants and bars, was a favorite of the city elite. Some of the more exclusive establishments had commanding views of Kaas City from their floor to ceiling windows.
At the distant city center, northeast of the The Hill Shopping Center, the enormous overpowering edifice known as The Citadel was the central focus of that fabulous view, which was much better at night when the towers of the city glittered with lights emanating from their countless windows in many different hues. At night, the city lights and lighted windows seemed like a galaxy of stars.
The exotic sports speeder pulled into a valet parking space in front of Graggo's Eats, lowered itself until it was centimeters from the surface, and shut down. The two sat quietly in the stopped speeder for a moment. Andronikos was tapping away at his datapad, while Virulous passively looked on, uninterested in what he might be doing on his device. After a brief moment, Andronikos broke the silence, as he returned his datapad to the inside pocket of his jacket.
"Have you ever thought about just asking the boss for a droid?"
Virulous looked as though he were asking her to walk bare footed across hot coals – without using The Force!
"Just tell him you want one as a bonus for all the hard work you do for him. Tell him what you told me, and he'll probably get you a top of the line model. He won't mind," the pirate promised, qualifying what he said, "I mean, be polite but firm. Politely firm. He's not tight with his money. He likes spending it."
"How can I ask the dark lord to gift me a droid when he doesn't even pay me wages?" Virulous asked, bitterly.
"I got a feeling that's probably an administrative error. The boss pays his people," Andronikos assured her.
"I cannot face him and ask that he pay me almost two years of back wages!" she agonized, explaining, "He'll laugh at me for being so weak, that I didn't have the nerve to ask for wages to begin with."
"Who says you gotta ask the boss?" Andronikos quipped, pointing out, "It's an administrative error. Talk to his accountant and get it straightened out with him," Andronikos said, reasonably.
Andronikos activated the exit system. The scissor doors swung up, allowing the pair to exit the speeder. As Andronikos walked around to the passenger side, the doors swung back down again sealing the passenger compartment tight.
With a flourish of his hand, Andronikos indicated for Virulous to proceed to the restaurant. When the two had walked past the luxury sports speeder, Andronikos picked up the conversation where he'd left off, and the speeder quietly started up and drove itself to the parking lot, to the parking space the valet parking space had told it to go.
"You'll like Yannos. He's a stand-up kind of guy. As soon as he knows that you've slipped through the cracks in his book keeping, he'll straighten it all out."
As Andronikos and Virulous entered the establishment, he removed his designer sunshades, folding it and sliding it into the breast pocket of his leather jacket. The two stopped just inside the door, and were greeted by the restaurant hostess. She guided them to a table by the almost invisible, floor to ceiling permaglass window, which offered an unparalleled view of the city from the hilltop restaurant.
Andronikos didn't want to sit by the window. He looked around the dining area.
"We'll sit over there," he said, nodding towards a booth at one of the walls well away from the window.
Virulous became disappointed but said nothing, following Andronikos to the boring booth with no view. Andronikos seemed happy, though. He took out two small devices, setting them at the center of their table and making adjustments to them until he was satisfied. The restaurant had just opened for business, and they were the first to arrive, which was just fine with the pirate. For him it meant an advantage.
The two hungry diners opened the menus offered them by the hostess. Perusing the offered lunch fare, Virulous gave up, setting her menu down.
"Order something for me," she demanded slightly exasperated, "I can't make up my mind. Everything in the menu looks so delicious."
"Do you want a heavy lunch or a light lunch, maybe something in the middle?" Andronikos asked.
"Something in the middle, I didn't eat breakfast and now I'm starving," she said matter-of-factly, "but I don't want to feel bloated."
"Can't have that," Andronikos said absently, "I hate it when I'm starving." He tilted his head up from the menu, his eyes looking up to his right, adding deadpan, "Can't say I care for feeling bloated, though. Full is nice, but bloated? No way."
Virulous didn't even crack a smile. She was too worried about what Nox would do when he found out that she allowed herself to be spied upon.
Andronikos set the menu down and waved at the hostess. She looked at one of the waiters standing at the side of the restaurant and nodded towards his table. The doors at the entrance slid open and another couple entered, laughing and chatting away. They followed the hostess to the table with the picturesque view.
Virulous' expression soured and she asked, "Why couldn't we sit at the window?"
"Because then they could snipe us from the outside," Andronikos explained, "This way, I'm forcing them to come in after us."
Virulous gave him a sardonic look. Plainly, she didn't believe him, but after a second, she realized he was absolutely serious. The waiter arrived beside their table.
"What can I get for you today?" he asked smiling.
"I'll have the roast traladon sandwich on a toasted Duros miner's roll, with a side of traladon dipping juice, deep-fried panpa root chips and house salad with Alderaanian dressing. My lady friend will have the deep fried breaded prawna with a Corellian cabbage slaw, a bowl of ladda soup, with a side of Tatoo flat bread. Bring a carafe of Ziost blend caf – hot, not iced, and two heated caf mugs."
"As always, Master Revel, your taste in cuisine and the company you keep is impeccable," The waiter said, smiling. He was angling for a nice tip later.
"Nothing but the best will do," Andronikos said, winking at Virulous.
The smiling waiter picked up the menus and turned to walk away to fulfill the order.
"I don't like being lumped together with a bunch of food as a sign of someone's good taste," Virulous said, a bit steamed, and adding with some indignation, "and just how many women do you bring to this place?"
"I bring 'em all here. What can I say? I like this place. But, yeah," Andronikos agreed, "he was kind of dumb saying all of that, but I don't want him spitting in my food or skimping on my portions because I called him on it and embarrassed him in front of a lady."
"You could have said something to him discretely," Virulous countered.
"You're right," Andronikos conceded with a hint of sarcasm, "I'll tell him to apologize to Darth Virulous for comparing her to lunch, and lumping her together with my other lady friends," he added, knowing how she would react.
"On second thought, never mind. Don't say anything," she said.
"If you say so," Andronikos replied, without irony.
Changing the subject, Virulous asked, "Do you really think assassins will come after us, here?"
"I'm not saying there is definitely someone coming to kill us," Andronikos clarified, "I'm just being careful, in case someone does come after us. I'm expecting intelligence types to come in to listen to us talk. Remember, I destroyed your transceiver after I told the auto pilot where to take us."
A couple of men entered the restaurant dressed in business suits and carrying briefcases. They looked like business executives to Andronikos. The two were shown to a table at a wall on the opposite end of the dining establishment.
"How will you know which ones are the spies?" Virulous asked, eyeing the two men.
"I won't know that," he confessed, pointing at one of the two compact devices he'd set up on their table, adding, "That's what this is for. It'll take holographic images of everyone that comes in while we're eating. I'll hand it off to Keeper, and he'll figure out who is who."
"Who's Keeper?" she asked.
"The boss' personal spy chief," he told her, and then asked, "You haven't met him?"
She shook her head indicating that she hadn't.
"Tall thin middle aged man," Andronikos said, "male pattern baldness, always looks uptight about something. He's a real stickler for rules, regulations. I think he was a general or something in the Imperial Army. He's a real spooky guy. He pops up out of nowhere and disappears without a trace.
"I hired some guys to keep tabs on him, and he always gave them the slip. Then one day, out of the blue, the boss told me to stop sending people after him and to leave him alone. It made the hairs on the back of my neck stand up. So, now I just leave him alone."
"Why should that make you wary?" Virulous asked.
"Well, obviously, he told the boss about the guys I hired. These guys are professionals, with excellent backgrounds in investigations. Some of them are in the Imperial Army's Military Police Investigations Unit." Andronikos said, and then paused for dramatic effect before saying, "He never touched them, never talked to them. So, how did he know they were working for me?"
Virulous realized a very important detail and looking about the restaurant, worriedly, whispered, "Hey! Didn't you say there might be some spies here, to spy on us? How could you talk about the dark lord's spy chief, then?"
Andronikos gave a curious expression.
"Take a look around, Shahn. Try to listen in on the conversations at the other tables."
Virulous immediately realized that she couldn't hear any of their voices. When Andronikos saw the light go on in her eyes, he explained it to her.
"All of the tables and booths have noise cancellation systems set up under them. Plus, this little toy, here," he pointed at the other tiny device set up on the table, "is a multi-frequency, multi-phasic sound scrambler. If anyone here tries to defeat the noise cancelers, they'll only get a variable pitched screeching sound, and not anything that we're saying."
Virulous reflected that the times were precariously dangerous. Andronikos was clearly taking security very seriously. The Imperial throne was vacant, and her master was vying to fill that vacancy. That meant that nearly everyone around her was a potential enemy working for her master's rivals.
"I'm not taking this seriously enough!" she thought, rebuking herself, "I'm going to get myself killed if I don't start paying better attention to what is unfolding around me!"
"How did you figure out my transceiver was monitored?" she asked the pirate.
"I'm gonna set you up with a new one with special features that'll let you know when you're being spied on," Andronikos said, as a way of answering, adding, "The boss needs to know, Shahn. The sooner you tell him the better it'll be for his security, and the better for our own security, too."
Virulous bristled on hearing her old name used so casually by the semi-retired pirate. She was going to say something about it to him, but realized it would seem silly, in light of the fact that she was working so hard to maintain her anonymity.
She wanted to remain anonymous which was why she was working so hard to hide who she was from her neighbors. She dressed in commoners' clothes, because she was living in commoners' housing. Now here she was eating in a commoners' eatery with a commoner.
"Darth Nox will become very angry with me if he learns about the lifestyle I am living," she reminded herself, shaking her head in self-reproach.
Andronikos watched her shake her head and incorrectly interpreted what it meant.
"Then you leave me no choice, Shahn. I'll have to tell him," he said gravely, his eyes judging her a coward.
"No!" she said emphatically, "I'll tell him."
It was bad enough that her master was going to learn of her humble lifestyle, but to have to have learned it from someone else would be even more shameful.
She shook her head again, telling the pirate, "The Imperial throne is vacant; our dark lord seeks to take it for himself; his enemies are looking for weaknesses which they can exploit, and I'm wandering around with my head in the clouds, worrying about my living conditions." She sighed and added, "I'm such an idiot."
Andronikos nodded his agreement, but said, "As long as you know your shortcomings and do something to fix 'em, then you'll be alright."
"I've really come low, if I need consolation and encouragement from a pirate," she said.
"You're even getting tips on how to fix your pay problems and asking for help to get a housekeeping droid from a pirate. What is this galaxy coming to?" Andronikos said, with no irony, whatsoever.
Virulous was stung by his flip rejoinder and shook her head again, in self-disgust.
"What kind of Sith lord am I? Am I that weak?" she asked herself in self condemnation.
The waiter came back, out of the kitchen, with two hot mugs and a carafe of steaming hot Ziost blend caf. Ziost blend caf wasn't actually from Ziost. It was a very strongly brewed caf with a bitter and slightly thick consistency in the Duros style. It was popularized among Imperial citizens on Ziost and spread from there, which was how it got its name within the Sith Empire.
The waiter was about to fill their mugs from the carafe, but Andronikos waived him off. As the waiter left their table again, Andronikos produced a device from within his jacket. He held it just over the liquid within the carafe and waited. A green indicator came on and he returned the device to the pocket inside of his jacket. He then picked up the carafe and poured some into both mugs until they were both a third filled.
"What if the mugs are poisoned," Virulous asked, surmising that was what Andronikos was testing for.
"That's why I asked for heated mugs," Andronikos explained, "The mugs are heated in ovens to ninety six degrees Celsius. Toxins won't behave well at those temperatures on solid, nonporous surfaces. It would be very easy to tell, if someone tried."
Changing the subject, he said, "They really should use smaller mugs to drink this stuff from."
It was his only critique of Graggo's Eats.
"We'll be lucky if we can finish two – one third mugs of this stuff," he said in anticipation of drinking the very strong brew, "It'll have us zinging off the walls by the time we're done eating lunch."
Several pairs of very chatty visitors entered all at once and lined up as the hostess greeted each pair and then quickly led each party to their tables, leaving menus at the tables with the guests. Virulous noticed that she could hear the waiters and hostess and the patrons when they first entered the restaurant but, once at their tables, their voices seemed to get sucked into some void. Virulous used The Force to sense for hatred or hostility, but she felt nothing of the sort coming from this crowd, nor from the patrons already seated.
The porter came out of the kitchen carrying a large tray with an array of dishes on it. He walked to their table and began to arrange their plates of food on to it, making sure the correct plates were set before the correct diner. He smiled, nodding at the two diners, in turn, and then walked back to the kitchen, holding the large tray under his arm.
Virulous reached for her fork, but Andronikos forestalled her.
"Hold on a bit," he said.
He produced the same device from before from inside of his jacket, and held it over each plate getting a green light each time. This time, however, he pulled the black ventilated cap off from the end of it, and touched the white felt tip of the device to the clean surfaces of each plate.
When he was done with the scans, he smiled and said, "Let's eat."
Virulous picked up one of the deep fried, breaded prawna with her fork. She nibbled it.
"Mmmmm!" she said, most delighted, taking a bigger bite.
Meanwhile, Andronikos began with a careful sip of his very hot caf from his preheated mug before arming himself with the cutlery. He cut a piece of his traladon sandwich and used his fork to lift it and dip it into the dipping juice before transferring the dripping morsel of food into his mouth. He closed his eyes and nodded appreciatively as he chewed.
"Mmm…," he said, happily.
They really know their way around good cuts of traladon," he said after swallowing his first mouthful.
Andronikos took out his holo-transceiver and placed a call on it.
"Call; Yan," the pirate said as he set the device onto the table next to his plate.
Andronikos chewed on a bite of a deep fried panpa chip as he cut another piece of his sandwich in preparation to soaking it in the dipping juice when a holographic image of a human male appeared above his device.
"Hey! If it isn't my favorite career criminal giving me a call to con me out of something!" the man on holo said, laughing.
"Says the man who's been skimming from the boss' pot," Andronikos shot back, smiling as he chewed.
Virulous raised an eyebrow on hearing that, as she sipped a spoonful of her ladda soup.
"Awe! Come on, Andro! You know jokes like that are off limits!" Yannos complained, having lost all traces of his good humor, "What did you call me for, to get me kil… fired?!"
"Alright, alright. I get it. It was cheap shot. I was just joking with you. Take it easy, will ya?"
"One of these days, Andro, your jokes are gonna have a very negative effect on my health."
Virulous nodded her concurrence with Yannos, Nox's chief accountant and money manager, as she bit into another deep fried breaded prawna.
"Look, I'm sorry. O.K., I got this bad habit of running my mouth. I even get myself into hot water from time to time. It's a bad habit of mine. I'll be more careful when I joke around with you, next time. Yeah?" Andronikos said, sounding genuinely conciliatory.
Virulous could only shake her head as she thought about all the times she's wanted to really teach the pirate a lesson for running his mouth, but his apology to Yannos was so sincere, that she felt she ought to give him a little slack.
"Yeah, sure, Andro," Yannos said, guardedly, waiting for Andronikos to drop the hammer on him.
"Say, Yan, I called because I wanna ask a couple of questions, and then maybe ask you for a favor," Andronikos said as he bit into another pampa chip.
"I don't know Andro. If I can help, I'll be happy to do that favor, but don't try asking for anything unrealistic," Yannos said, waiting for Andronikos to strike.
"Hey! You know me! I'm the voice of reason," Andronikos said, eliciting a laugh from Yannos and a smirk from Virulous.
"You remember Xalek?" the pirate asked.
"Yeah. Quiet guy. Very serious about everything. A shame that he died," Yannos said.
"Yeah. Xalek was bit odd, but he was honest," Andronikos, said, adding to Yannos' description of the dead Sith lord. "I liked him. He stuck to business. Didn't take things personally, most of the time."
"Yeah," Yannos agreed absently, as he wondered what Andronikos was getting at.
Virulous was waiting for the pirate to say it was her fault that Xalek had died.
"Virulous was there the day Xalek was killed in a battle with the Jedi. She got pounded that day, too. Those Jedi were no joke. The boss was broken up about Xalek, but he was impressed with Virulous," Andronikos said.
"O.K., Andro. I get it. You wanna say that Xalek was a standup guy. Personally, all I ever saw in him was a cold, calculating killer who really worshiped the ground our employer walked on. Why don't we save a little bit of time and you get to the point?"
"The point, Yannos, is that Xalek is still drawing a payday. Why is that?" the pirate asked, finally springing his ploy.
Yannos said nothing.
"Virulous was fuming about the boss not paying her for her work," Andronikos continued, "She was gonna let him have a piece of her mind about not getting paid all this time," Andronikos lied, "I was trying not to laugh at her. I asked her, 'why'd you wait all this time to say something?' You should have seen the look she gave me. I thought I'd finally done it and crossed the line with her."
Andronikos was plainly having a good time putting Yannos on the spot, and poking fun at Virulous at the same time. Virulous was giving him the 'I'm gonna destroy you' look, as Andronikos liked calling it.
"Can you imagine what the boss would think of his chief accountant and money manager if he promised to look into it and found that Xalek was still getting paid?" Andronikos said, as though he were gossiping to a friend about the misdeeds of another friend, then he asked, "And what are you gonna tell the boss about Virulous' pay going to another account that she didn't know existed?"
Andronikos paused to see what Yannos would say. Yannos remained silent, while Virulous, who also remained silent, had plainly become livid, as she focused on the holographic image of that thieving Yannos.
"I think the boss would totally get the wrong idea about you, Yan," Andronikos said, adding, "Lucky for you, I talked her out of talking to the boss. I told her I'd have a word with you and have it all fixed. I told her, 'it has to be some kind of administrative error. Yannos is a good guy. He'll fix it right up.' So, she's letting me handle it. Am I your friend, or what?!"
"Yeah, Adnro," Yannos said, very tightly. "You're a blasted good friend."
Although his tone of voice indicated that he'd like to make Andronikos disappear, Yannos knew he couldn't do anything to the murderously vicious pirate. Andronikos had him in a bind.
"What do you want?" Yannos asked brusquely.
"Let's see," Andronikos said, taking another sip from his mug of caf. "Xalek was making forty K…"
"Thirty five K," Yannos corrected.
"Thirty five K per month," Andronikos conceded. "He's been dead, twenty two months, and Virulous hadn't been paid since she started working for the boss about twenty three months ago. So, you owe her eight hundred and five K in back pay."
"She's owed five hundred seventy five K in back pay," Yannos corrected, then clarified, "She was drawing twenty five K per month, Andro."
Andronikos made a face as though he was scandalized at what he'd heard.
"Whoa, Yan! Darth Virulous is gonna get really steamed when she hears that she was drawing ten K per month less than Xalek. When she finds out that you were stealing her… I mean, that her pay was accidentally diverted to an account that isn't hers…"
"Alright! She's drawing thirty five K, same as Xalek!" Yannos surrendered.
"And she's due for a raise," Andronikos added, "so starting next month, she gets forty K per month."
Virulous put her fork down with a look of utter astonishment at Andronikos, as it finally dawned on her that Yannos had been stealing from her master, from DARTH NOX, and that Andronikos was blackmailing him over it.
"The dark lord is going think that I'm mixed up with these two stealing from him!" she thought in silent panic.
"She's getting the thirty five K. That's already a ten K pay increase, and it's back dated to her date of hire!" Yannos said frustratedly, adding officiously, "If she wants another pay increase, she needs to talk to the boss about a raise."
"Awe! Come on, Yan! How are you gonna explain to the boss how Xalek's been getting paid when he's been dead all this time?" Andronikos asked reasonably, while making a veiled threat with his next question. "Is the boss gonna find out that Xalek's financial accounts had all been closed, but his pay was being deposited to an account created after he died?
"If the boss finds out, then I know Virulous won't get her pay raise – and neither will I," Andronikos said, finally spelling out what he wanted in return for his silence.
"But how did Andronikos learn about all of this?!" Virulous asked herself, "If the dark lord asks me my part in this, I'll just say that I was fixing a pay problem. Any theft is the work of this Yannos person and of this pirate!"
"You blasted gizka waste puddle….," Yannos growled out at Andronikos.
"A five thousand a month pay increase isn't that big a deal, Yan. You've been pocketing Xalek's and Virulous' pay all this time. Besides, you're an accountant. I'm sure you'll find creative ways to get Virulous and me our pay raises, and still keep skimming off the boss' pot," Andronikos said reasonably.
"Let's go over this, so that we're all clear about it," Andronikos said, "Virulous gets eight hundred and five K lump sum back pay. Starting next month, Virulous gets a five K monthly pay increase, and effective immediately, I get my five K monthly pay increase. Finally, you get to figure out another way to skim off the boss."
"That lump sum is gonna be awfully hard to cover up, Andronikos."
"You know what just occurred to me, Yan?" Andronikos asked, as though it were an idle question, "What if the boss was looking into all of this and found out that Xalek and Virulous were actually drawing two paydays a month?"
"O.K., Andro. You win. I'll do it like you said."
"You're the best, Yan!" Andronikos said, as if Yannos were doing him a great favor, "That's what I really like about you; you really know how to lookout for your friends!"
"Blasted shining Stars, Andro!" Yannos replied, ruefully, shaking his head. "If only I had fewer friends like you!"
"Awe, come on, Yan. Don't say that," Andronikos said, as though his feelings were hurt, but he wore a huge predator's grin, adding, "I could have gone straight to the boss and told him all about your pot skimming. Did I? No, I didn't. I talked it over with you, instead. Right?"
"Yeah," Yannos grudgingly admitted.
"Don't that make us friends, Yan?"
"Not exactly the kind of friends I'd like to have, but I get your point, Andro."
"I'll have Virulous give you a call with her account details so that you can start sending her pay," Andronikos said, before cutting the connection.
Andronikos looked up at Virulous, sitting across the table from him with that predator's grin still on his face.
"You're pay problem has been fixed. Now we find you a droid."
"How did you find all of that information?" Virulous asked, shocked. "It's not possible that you took a wild guess and got it right," she said aloud, but to herself, "Unless you used The Force."
Andronikos took on a quizzical expression as though he couldn't understand how Virulous couldn't figure it out. He pointed to his datapad on the table beside his holo-transceiver.
"I researched it. Well, I hired some slicers to steal his pass codes and stuff, I installed a backdoor admin account, so even if he changes his pass codes, I'll know what those are. Anyway, I accessed his data bases a long time ago and figured out how he was skimming money from the boss. So, when you told me you weren't getting paid, I logged into his databases and dug around until I found it."
"Why haven't you told the dark lord?" Virulous demanded, "He could ruin our master financially, and greatly weaken him in the eyes of his rivals and enemies on the Dark Council."
"I've been keeping an eye on him. So, far everything he's done has been small time. He hasn't tried to do anything destructive, like that. If he tries it, I'll know about it and activate a kill code that'll lock him out of his accounts before he can hurt the boss, and then I'll take him out," Andronikos said.
At that moment, Virulous came to realize that it was Andronikos who was the greater threat to the dark lord, but she said nothing else. Instead, she took out her datapad, and a blank credit card. She transferred fifty thousand credits to the card and slid it to Andronikos.
Andronikos slid it back, not knowing how much was on it, telling her, "Hey, don't sweat it. This one's on me."
Virulous slid the card back and speaking firmly told the pirate, "I do not want to owe you any favors. I do not want to be indebted to you. Take it. There's no telling what you'll demand I do to repay your favor."
Andronikos developed a sour expression as he reluctantly took the credit card.
"You're a lot smarter than Yannos. I'll give you that, but my help never comes cheap," the pirate said as he waived the credit card over his datapad. "I know what stuff is…. worth," Andronikos' sour expression and tone of voice changed, "and it looks like you know what stuff is worth, too."
"Good," Virulous said, sounding relieved, "I won't have to tell the dark lord about his crooked accountant and that you've been blackmailing him instead of telling him about it."
"I'm glad that you have a perfect understanding about that, Shahn," the pirate said dryly.
Virulous had had enough. Bolting to her feet she pointed an angry finger at Andronikos.
"I am Darth Virulous, apprentice to Darth Nox, Dark Lord of The Sith! What do I have to do to get you to respect me as such?!"
Andronikos had never wanted to laugh so hard in his life. She was so short, that he hardly had to look up at her as she stood angrily pointing a finger at him from the other side of the dining table. He looked down at the table in front of him, so that he wouldn't have to see the hilarity of it.
"You know what a clown I am," Andronikos said, realizing how dangerously close he was to crossing the line with her, "I'm always disrespectful. I mean, I even call Darth Nox, 'Boss.' Don't I?"
He reminded himself that she had nearly killed him at least once, and did everything she could to restrain herself from killing him on another occasion, while she cut off his air supply to make a point. Andronikos looked up again and saw anger and humiliation on her facade.
"I just remembered you saying, on the ship, how much you was gonna miss your old name," Andronikos said, thinking fast, "So, I was using it just so that you could hear it again. I was trying to be nice this time." Andronikos pointed at the device on the table, adding, "Remember, no one else can hear what we're saying at our table."
Virulous was reminded of this and looking around the restaurant, saw that a few of the patrons were idly looking at their table. Their lips were moving as they commented, but she could hear nothing. She resumed her seat. The women gave her sympathetic looks, and shifted their eyes towards Andronikos, revealing their disdain for the scoundrel.
It was obvious to the other diners, that Andronikos had said something to upset her and they thought of him as a cad, but they had no idea that she was a Sith lord seated amongst them. She realized that if they knew she were Sith, they would have quickly and quietly escaped the restaurant, not wanting to get caught up in a Sith lord's wrath.
Virulous considered Andronikos' position and after a moment to reflect told him what she thought.
"The dark lord permits your familiarity with him, because it suits his interests. What do you think his interests will be if he ascends the throne and becomes Emperor? Do you think Emperor Nox would permit you to call him 'Boss' anymore? Do you think he will allow you to enter his presence so freely and not kneel before him?
"At that time, he will demand more from you. Are you prepared to give him more? If not, where in the galaxy do you think you'll be able to go to escape his reach?"
She could see that Andronikos' eyes had changed, but there wasn't fear in his eyes, only the twinkle of mischief.
"I already had that talk with the boss," he told Virulous with a smug grin, "I convinced him he won't need a small time criminal like me to do dirty jobs for him anymore. He'll have the full capacity and all of the resources of Sith Intelligence, and the Imperial military at his command," he said smiling, adding, "He's gonna let me retire. All I'll have to do is kneel at his feet and say, Darth Nox, Dark Lord and Emperor over all Sith and the Empire, and my Emperor in front of you, Khem and everybody."
After watching an instant of disgust flash across her face, he asked Virulous, "What about you, Darth Virulous? What are your plans for retirement? Or are you gonna ask for his old seat on the Dark Council?"
"The dark lord may be plotting to kill me," she said, darkly as she lifted another deep fried breaded prawna to her mouth and glumly took a bite. "I don't know why. I'm loyal to him and obey his every command," she said to Andronikos. Thinking about the Sith Code, she thought to herself, "I'm obedient because I'm weak. I don't have the power to free myself."
"I don't know about all of that," Andronikos said. "The boss seems to be taking a liking to you. Khem Val likes you, too."
Virulous' eyes bugged open on hearing that, asking with great incredulity, "Khem Val likes me?! Ha!" Then real mirth struck her, forcing real laughter out of her.
"You meant he'd like me for dinner!" she said, laughing at her own joke.
"Well, he hasn't said anything about eating you in a good while, at least not to me," Andronikos replied, smiling at her joke, "You can tell that he trusts you around the boss, too. He's stopped shadowing you whenever you go talk to the boss," Andronikos observed, qualifying his observations, "I don't know. Maybe I'm just reading too much into it."
"Do you like me?" Virulous asked, tempering her pointed question with a smile.
"Only when you're not trying to kill me," was Andronikos' unhesitant and pointed reply, also delivered with a smile. Then he added, "Hey! Aren't I having lunch with you, helping you with your pay problems and helping you get a droid? What are friends for?"
Virulous tipped her head towards the pirate seated across the table from her, smiling and masking what she thought.
"He just tried to bind me into his debt!" she thought. Aloud she repeated, "What are friends for?"
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