Buffy and Faith watched the pre-portal versions of themselves as they fought against Balthazar's minions and argued about tactics. Each wincing at the behavior of their former selves. When they watched Faith declare that she was about to follow the vampires into the sewers, both slayers tensed.

Buffy still wasn't sure she completely understood why they had to let it happen. But Faith seemed to be getting exasperated with her inability to understand, so eventually, she decided to just pretend to.

When the original versions of themselves disappeared, they crept forward.

Buffy poked her head into the sewer opening. "They're gone and no portal. Let's go."

They jumped into the tunnel and easily dispatched the vampires that had given them so much trouble the first time around.

Moving in total synchronicity, they played off of each other and staked the vampires without effort. Once they were all dusted, Faith scooped up the amulet and smiled.

"Now what?" Faith asked as she tucked it into her jacket pocket.

"I don't know." Buffy chuckled, "so weird that we spent all that time trying to get back. Now the thought of going back to my normal routine… it doesn't sound all that great."

"Gotta get back to it, though, right? School, friends, family - Angel." She said Angel's name carefully, trying not to let it show that she actually cared about Buffy's answer.

They had spent so much time together that Buffy knew how to read Faith and her insecurities. Yet, she hadn't figured out how to respond to them. Buffy could tell by the way Faith was not looking at her that Faith was one second from leaving. There was only one option she saw to stop that.

Buffy did her best to fight off her despair and crossed her arms over her chest. "Let's go kill Balthazar."

"What?" Faith blinked, not at all expecting Buffy to avoid her question so thoroughly.

"We know where he is, right? So let's go take him out." It seemed to Buffy that she couldn't appeal to Faith's feelings. She had to try another tactic.

Faith tried to fight the grin that was spreading across her face. Her muscles tensed in preparation for battle. "Should we check in with the watchers first? What was the new one's name?"

"Don't remember. Let's just go. We can report in later." Buffy scooped up one of the discarded swords and tossed it to Faith, grabbing another for herself.

Faith grinned and followed Buffy out of the sewers and back up into the night. They made their way to the warehouse where they had found the demon before.

"Buffy?"

Buffy winced, "Angel." With her concern over Faith leaving, Buffy had forgotten all about Angel.

"You're… different." He sniffed the air around her, and she couldn't help but laugh.

"Yeah, guess you could say that." Faith had stepped away to give them privacy. Buffy grabbed her arm and pulled her closer. "We were about to take care of this demon. Wanna help?"

She didn't wait for a response before delivering a front kick to the metal door. The door, which was not designed to open inward, protested loudly before it flew through the air - knocking out three vampires before crashing into the opposite wall.

"Hey, I hear you're looking for this." Faith pulled the amulet out of her pocket and held it up.

Balthazar started screeching from his cement tub. Faith laughed and crushed the ornate item into powder. The remnants snapped and fizzled in her hand before falling to the ground.

Balthazar screamed obscenities and the remaining vampires ran towards the slayers.

They quickly fell into a pattern of destruction. Slicing limbs and heads with barely any effort. Angel had been prepared to jump in at any moment, but it was clear that he wasn't needed. He was more than a little confused at how much Buffy seems to have changed in a very short period of time.

He also did not miss the new way that the slayers were interacting.

When only the immobile demon was left, the slayers approached him carefully. Buffy poked at him with her sword curiously.

"You will regret this! I am the only one who could have stopped him!"

"Him?" Buffy asked.

Balthazar pouted absurdly. "I'm not telling."

"What are you? Like 5? Come on. Don't make us torture you." Faith said, hopped up on the edge of his tub, and jabbed him a few times with her sword.

The demon was refusing to answer, and neither slayer was all that interested in torturing him.

"What now?" Faith asked, just looking for her chance to leave.

"I guess we ask Giles what we should do?"

"I can go get him." Angel offered, and Buffy almost jumped in surprise at hearing his voice. She had forgotten all about him.

"Um, sure. Good idea."

Faith almost suggested that Buffy should go with him - he was gone before she got the chance. Now they were stuck waiting alone together, and she was sure Buffy was going to want to talk.

But Buffy didn't want to talk. She could feel Faith pulling away from her, and she had no idea how to bring her back. Just like she had been doing for months, she avoided the conversation because she knew how it was going to end. Buffy opted to wait in strained silence, deciding that would at least delay Faith leaving.

The slayers stood side-by-side against the wall. Their positions mirrored, arms crossed, and their eyes locked on the floor. The demon continued to blather and rant - but no one was paying attention to him.

Fifteen minutes later, Angel returned with the watchers. Buffy tried to listen to them and respond to their questions, but her mind was firmly stuck in what was going to happen next. The sound of a struggle behind her just managed to break through to her awareness.

Buffy turned to see that Angel was struggling with some unseen force and being dragged back towards Balthazaar. Buffy hesitated, but Faith did not. She took a running leap and drove her sword into the enormous demon's face. He didn't even have time to scream before he was dead.

The room was left in stunned silence.

"I guess that settles the debate on what to do with him," Giles said dryly.

After a few moments, the new watcher began asking questions relentlessly. Mostly about why they had deviated from his well-crafted plan. The slayers rolled their eyes and left the building together.

They were walking for several minutes before it occurred to Buffy that she had no idea where they were going. She wasn't even sure who was following who.

"Alright, I'm outta here." Faith stopped walking and said after she had the same realization.

"Wait, really?" Buffy knew it was a long shot, but she'd really hoped that the slaying would be enough to get Faith to stay.

"Yeah, B. I told you…."

"Right, OK." Buffy tried to school her features. There were a lot of things she thought she might be able to say to convince Faith to stay. But none of what she could say would change the fact that Faith didn't want the same things she did.

"I'm not trying to hurt you."

"I know." Buffy did her best to hold her tears in. "Just..." She started and then stopped. "Just know that I'll miss you, and if you ever want to come back - you'll always be welcome."

Faith couldn't maintain eye contact. She nodded slightly to indicate that she heard what Buffy had said.

"And look... I know I messed everything up..." Buffy grunted, she never imagined she'd be on this side of unrequited love. "If you do decide to stay, I won't bother you. We might have to do slayer stuff together, but I promise that it will be on your terms."

Faith didn't react, and just for a moment - Buffy hated her. Buffy hated Faith for not admitting how she felt. For not even being willing to try.

It was only a moment, though. Buffy loved Faith too much to hold on to that anger. She knew Faith was afraid. And she knew that despite everything they'd been through, it wasn't enough for Faith to trust her.

More than anything, though, Buffy hated herself. She hated herself for being too weak to show Faith how she really felt. If she had, maybe they wouldn't be here right now. If she had tried, at least she would know. Now she was left with doubts. Was Faith just pretending all this time? Was all that contact and sleeping together just some sort of twisted game Faith was playing?

If it wasn't a twisted game - didn't that mean that Faith was being hurt now too? Buffy added that to her list of things to feel guilty about. She knew that Faith didn't know how to care about someone or how to react when someone cared about her. Maybe Buffy could have convinced her if she had just been brave enough to try.

It was too late now. Faith was leaving, and Buffy was left with countless regrets and nothing she could do about any of them.

Buffy couldn't take Faith's silence anymore, so she turned and walked away. Every step away from Faith was another crack in her heart.

The next two weeks of Buffy's life were pure hell. Everyone kept asking her about what happened, but she didn't feel like talking about it. She might be willing to share their adventures if Faith was with her, but without her, it just seemed so pointless.

Her intent had been not to even say anything about their travels. It wasn't even clear to her how it happened, but everyone seemed to know that something had changed, and she eventually ended up blurting it out.

The new watcher was particularly tedious. Trying to get her to explain, in painstaking detail, every aspect of each dimension.

The worst of all of it was the nights. Buffy had gotten so used to sharing a bed or at least a room with Faith that she couldn't sleep alone. She had tried slaying to exhaustion, but that never worked. Even when she barely managed to drag herself home, as soon as she lay down to sleep - she was wide awake.

After the first few days, she gave up on trying to sleep and simply stayed out all night looking for vampires to kill. Eventually, that stopped serving as a distraction. She started hallucinating that Faith was with her. She'd toss a vampire in the direction of the imaginary Faith like she had done hundreds of times in the past few months.

As things devolved further, she started barely winning her fights. After a scary near miss, she realized she had to stop letting her misery win. It wouldn't do any good if she died while Faith was gone with no way of contacting her.

Sunnydale needed a slayer, even if she was a broken-down shell of a person - she still has a job to do.

As Buffy tended to her wounds, it occurred to her how ridiculous she was being.

She was completely hung up on someone that she didn't even know. Sure they had spent almost every moment of the past year together - but they didn't spend any of that time talking.

She didn't even know Faith's last name or if she had siblings or anything else about her. How could she be this upset about someone she knew so little about?

When Buffy closed her eyes that night, she was determined to get her life back on track. Besides a brief interaction with Angel, she hadn't spent any time with anyone else since she'd been back.

It was time to remember how to be Buffy again.

As she approached the library the next day, all her carefully thought-out plans from the previous night vanished from her mind.

The sound of Faith's voice reached her through the door, and she froze. She was torn between wanting to run into the library to confront Faith and needing to run away.

Opting for neither, she slowly pushed into the library and dropped into a chair. Trying to ignore Faith and just wait until she was done talking to Wesley.

"You ready?"

"Huh?" Buffy was surprised to hear Faith's voice and feel her gentle touch on her shoulder.

"Training - are you ready?" Faith asked and cocked her head.

"What?" Buffy was completely dumbfounded and couldn't make any sense of what Faith was talking about.

Wesley chimed in, "It is time to resume training."

Buffy looked at him as if he had two heads. "Training?!" She took an aggressive step towards him, and Faith jumped between them.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Chill out."

Buffy scowled and shoved Faith away. Since entering the library, she had been reminding herself over and over that Faith was just her co-worker now - they were nothing to each other. That mantra wasn't working very well. Between being exhausted and repressing all of her feelings - Buffy snapped. "Fine. Let's train." With that, she unleashed all her frustration in one violent burst.

Faith just barely blocked Buffy's attacks, retreating and rolling to the side to get space. Buffy didn't let up even a little and leaped to Faith's new position to continue the onslaught.

"Buffy! I must insist you stop right this moment!" Wesley yelled, but Buffy ignored him.

She landed a solid blow to Faith's ribs, the grunt and look of shock on Faith's face finally got her to stop. She dropped her hands and backed away.

Without a word, she turned and left the library - ignoring the calls of her name.

"What the fuck?" Faith caught up to her in the hallway, grabbing her and spinning her around. "What was that about?"

Buffy sighed. Her anger was gone - all she felt was sad. "Sorry - I just…. I'm sorry." She turned away from Faith and started walking again. Much to her annoyance, Faith kept pace with her.

"Are you going to the Bronze tonight?" Faith asked in a very abrupt change of topic.

"No." Buffy was too frustrated with herself to be really paying attention to what Faith was trying to do.

"Hanging with your boy?"

Buffy stopped walking and tilted her head at Faith. "I told him to leave. He's in LA now." Buffy winced at the memory of her talk with Angel. She had been too focused on Faith to really explain to him her reasoning. And now she didn't even know how to contact him to try to explain further.

"Oh." Faith furrowed her brow.

"I told you I was going to. You didn't believe me?"

Faith looked down at her feet and shrugged. "Just figured you'd come to your senses once you saw him again."

Buffy huffed and started walking again.

"Why don't you come to the Bronze then?"

"Not really in the mood." The last thing Buffy wanted to do was go to the Bronze. Faith being back meant she could get back to her nightly patrols. That was all she could think about.

"OK, yeah. I get that." Then Faith paused and tried to look disinterested. "Well, if you change your mind - I'll be there. Maybe we could… I don't know… hang out."

Buffy was thoroughly confused. She thought she had begun to understand a little bit of how Faith thought, but this really wasn't making sense. It occurred to her that this entire interaction was a hallucination.

Faith seemed to be real and solid enough, but nothing she was saying seemed like the Faith she knew. Then she remembered that she didn't know Faith at all. so maybe this wasn't weird at all. "Sure, I'll think about it."

Buffy didn't miss the hint of smile Faith tried not to hide. "Cool - then I'll see you there… I mean - if you decide to come."

Buffy shook her head and watched Faith walk away. A tiny bit of hope growing inside her that Faith decided not to leave after all. She had no delusions that this meant they would be friends or anything more, but she might at least have her slaying partner back.

Buffy approached the Bronze slowly, just as she was about to enter - she caught movement out of the corner of her eye. Someone or something had slinked into the alley. Without hesitation, Buffy headed into the side of the building to make sure it wasn't a vampire.

The alley was empty when she arrived. It occurred to her that she really did need to find a way to get some sleep. While her nightly slayer sessions might read otherwise - she did not want to die.

The alley entrance burst open, and a couple fell out of it. They were laughing and giggling as they made out a few feet from where Buffy was standing. She took just a moment to verify that they were both humans before slipping into the door. Her plan was to sneak in and see if Faith was even there. Then she would decide whether to stay or not.

Buffy stood in the darkened hallway for a few moments. She saw Faith leaning against a post, her eyes fixed on the entrance. Any time a new person would enter, Faith would get an excited glint in her eye, only to lose it as soon as she didn't see who she was looking for.

Buffy watched her for a while, wondering who Faith was expecting to see. When Faith's eyes widened with excitement, and she took a step towards the entrance - Buffy followed her gaze to see Willow and Xander entering.

Buffy frowned and wondered why Faith was so excited to see them. She almost turned and walked away, but she noticed that Faith's smile deflated again.

A man approached Faith, but she ignored him. The man didn't relent, and Faith shoved him away.

"I'm waiting for someone. Now fuck off." Faith said through clenched teeth.

"How about I keep you company while you wait." The man said and leaned closer. Faith grimaced and was on the verge of punching him in the face.

"Hey, Faith. Sorry, I'm late." Buffy came to her rescue, and the man sneered before finally walking away.

When the man left, Buffy wasn't quite sure what to do next. She only interfered because she didn't want Faith to get into a fight. She still wasn't sure Faith had actually invited her here. "I'm gonna go say hi to Willow. Do you want to hang with us while you wait for your date to show up?"

"My what?"

"Your date - you said you were waiting for someone."

"Oh…" Faith practically choked out. Buffy had no idea how to interpret her reaction. "I'm fine here. Go ahead."

Buffy deflated. She had briefly hoped that Faith was actually waiting for her. Looking over at Willow, her spirits sunk even further. Willow would ask her questions she didn't feel like answering.

The truth was that she missed Faith. She missed the adventure of the past few months, and now that she was back in her everyday life - it just seemed too hard to function without Faith by her side. She had given up on the idea that they could be girlfriends, but she had hoped that they'd at least be friends.

As the reality that Faith didn't even want to be her friend became impossible to ignore, Buffy fell even further into despair. She couldn't even be mad at Faith - it wasn't her fault that she didn't like Buffy. The only thing they had in common was slaying. They were basically co-workers, forced together by circumstance.

"You OK?" Faith asked, "You kinda spaced out for a bit."

"No, I'm not." Buffy sucked in a breath. Then she looked at Faith again, hoping to see something there, but there was nothing. Faith was back to staring expectantly at the door. "Nothing changed for you at all - did it?"

"What?"

"With how you feel about me. You still hate me." Buffy shook her head and walked away - heading towards the back so she could hopefully escape without Willow noticing her.

"Buffy!" Willow's cheerful voice called out to her, and she tried not to let her disappointment show. Buffy tried to remind herself that she wanted to reconnect with her friends.

"Hey, Will." Somehow, she managed to plaster a fake smile on her face and changed direction to meet with her friend.

"I'm so glad you decided to come tonight! It's been so long since we hung out." Willow grinned and tugged Buffy towards the table where Xander and Cordelia were waiting.

Buffy sat down and tried to smile and engage with her friends, but it wasn't going well at all. All she could think about was Faith.

"So when are you gonna spill some details of where you were?" Xander asked.

"It's not that interesting. I'd rather just forget it ever happened." Buffy hoped they would just drop the questions. If they would stop asking, maybe she really could forget. Then she could remember how to be Buffy again.

"Was it that awful being stuck with Faith for all that time?" Willow asked, and Buffy quickly shook her head.

"No, it was fine. If she hadn't been with me, I never would have found my way back here."

"Well, you must be glad not to have to spend all your time with her anymore." Willow offered, and Buffy tried not to scowl. It wouldn't do any good to explain that she'd spend all her time with the other slayer if she could.

"Yeah, sure." Then she puffed out her cheeks. "I'm gonna head out. You guys have a good night."

"But you just got here!" Willow lamented and reached for Buffy's hand.

"Yeah, I know - I just… I have to finish patrolling and get back home." Buffy hoped her smile looked genuine. "I'll see you guys tomorrow."

With that, she escaped out of the Bronze and leaned against the wall of the alley, trying to get her feelings under control.

"I was waiting for you." Faith's voice called out from the darkness.

"You were?" Buffy tried not to let any hope creep in. She didn't know what Faith was trying to do, but she wasn't going to let this mean anything. Faith was probably just trying to make things less tense between them.

"Yeah… I was." Faith moved closer. "I don't hate you."

"Maybe - but you don't like me either." When Faith didn't try to argue that point, Buffy started to get irritated. it felt too much like Faith was intentionally trying to hurt her. "What are you even doing here? I thought you were going to leave Sunnydale?"

"Changed my mind." Faith shrugged.

Buffy rolled her eyes. Mostly she was annoyed with herself for being bitter. It was childish and ridiculous. She had told Faith to stay. She couldn't be mad at her for doing it.

"I thought you wanted me to stay?"

"I did - I do." Buffy quickly corrected. Despite how upset she was - she still thought Faith was better off staying in Sunnydale and letting Wesley be her watcher.

"Cool. Well… do you want to check out my new place?"

"You've got a new place?"

"Yeah - I mean, it's not that great. It's a lot better than that shitty motel."

Buffy smiled, "sure - I'd like to check it out."

Faith grinned and started walking, and Buffy followed. Buffy was enjoying getting to spend time with Faith, so she restrained herself from asking questions. Not wanting to say anything that might start a fight and call an early end to this night. Though she was about 90% sure that this wasn't even happening. It wasn't the first time that she imagined Faith was with her since they've been back.

"So here it is." Faith said as she unlocked and pushed the door open. It was a pretty nice-sized studio apartment. It was sparsely furnished, but as Faith said - it was a lot better than her motel room.

"Wow, this is really great." Buffy offered honestly. Faith having an apartment seemed like proof that Faith was going to stay in town.

"Yeah, it's not bad. Will and Xander helped me pick some stuff out."

Buffy thought that maybe her head was going to explode. Not only had Faith been avoiding her, but instead, she had been spending time with her friends. "Oh wow," Buffy said, or at least she thought she said it. It was possible she was in some kind of waking nightmare, so she couldn't be sure of anything.

"Yeah, I'm gonna have a housewarming party this Friday. Just gotta see if Wes will give me an advance on my allowance." Faith chuckled to herself and flopped down on the couch. She picked up a video game controller and slid on a headset.

Buffy watched her with confusion for a few minutes before continued to scan the apartment, trying to figure out why Faith brought her here. Her eye caught something unusual poking out from under Faith's pillow. When she realized what it was, she clenched her jaw painfully. White-hot daggers of pain shot through her stomach.

Without indicating what she saw, she abruptly turned and headed for the door, opening it and finding herself standing outside. She glanced back into the apartment to see if Faith had noticed that she left. Faith was engaged in her game and clearly did not notice or care about where Buffy had gone.

Buffy walked home dejectedly, even more determined to keep her distance from Faith than before.

The rest of the week passed without incident. It was Friday afternoon - Willow, Oz, Xander, and Cordelia are hanging out in the library waiting for Buffy to finish her training with Giles. Faith was with Wesley and expected back any moment.

Buffy executed an especially violent maneuver and broke the staff Giles had been training her with. "Sorry." She said without much emotion and dropped into one of the chairs.

Buffy wasn't even sure why she continued to train with Giles at all. Giles wasn't even officially her watcher, but Wesley appeared to have no interest in training her. After that first attempt at training together, the suggestion was never made again.

Buffy's nightly patrols had been getting progressively more pointless as well. Most of her time was spent worrying that she'd run into Faith. On top of that, she was only encountering one or two newbie vamps. It was becoming more stressful than it was worth.

She was vaguely aware that something big was going down, but only because she had overheard Faith and Wesley discussing something. As soon as they noticed her, they quickly changed the subject, and Buffy couldn't bring herself to ask. If she was needed, they would have told her.

"I'm bringing chips!" Xander offered excitedly.

"I'm on soda." Willow checked another item off her list. "What about you, Buffy?"

"What about me?" Buffy hadn't been paying attention to their conversation at all, but she perked up at being included in something.

"What are you bringing to Faith's tonight?"

"Oh." Her spirits dropped.

"It can be something easy - we've got ice and cups left." Willow hovered her pen over the paper. "Which can I put you down for?"

Buffy puffed out her cheeks and tried not to show too much of a reaction. "I wasn't invited." She took a sip of water and stood up.

"Of course you were! How could you not be?" Willow frowned in confusion.

"I'm sure Buffy is used to not being invited to things." Cordelia offered helpfully. "I haven't invited her to all kinds of things."

"Thanks for the support," Buffy said sarcastically.

"Well, if you're not going, then neither am I!" Willow proclaimed and crossed her arms over her chest.

Buffy chuckled, "I appreciate the solidarity - but it's not necessary. Besides, you're bringing soda."

"But.. but…" Willow blubbered.

"Will, really. It's totally fine. Someone had to patrol anyway. You guys have fun tonight." Buffy stood up and stretched. In a bizarre way, she was looking forward to a quiet night alone. In the bizarre way that she wasn't at all looking forward to it and really wished the Hellmouth would open up and swallow her. When it didn't happen after a few more seconds, she said goodbye to her friends and left the library.

She heard Faith and Wesley just as she was almost to the exit, even though she knew it was completely childish - she ducked into a classroom to let them pass without being noticed. She waited a few minutes before slipping out and taking the back way home.

"Hey, mom," Buffy said when she made her way upstairs.

"Hi, Buffy! I'm surprised you came home." Her mom was busy moving around the room, clearly getting ready for a night out.

"What? Why wouldn't I come home? I do still live here, right?"

"As far as I know - I just thought you'd be helping Faith set up the party." Her mom was sliding in her earrings, and Buffy was gawking at her.

"You know about the party?" Buffy was sure now that she must be trapped in a nightmare. It was the only thing that made sense.

"Well, yeah. I know it's probably a little weird - me hanging out with a bunch of teenagers. But I thought I should make an appearance. I am curious about her apartment."

Buffy's brain completely froze, and she couldn't manage to respond. She followed her mom like a zombie into the kitchen as she mindlessly watched her grab her keys and purse.

"Oh, come on! It's not bad, is it? I'll only be there for a few minutes. Just to say hi."

Buffy rubbed her temples as she tried to remember how to speak. "It's not bad at all. You should stay as long as you want."

"I wouldn't want to cramp your style."

"I don't think that will be a problem," Buffy said before exiting the kitchen and heading up to her room.

"I'll see you at Faith's!" Buffy's mom called up the stairs. Buffy sighed and rolled her neck. The sun would be down soon, and she'd be able to get back to what she was best at.

The plan had been to slay her misery away. To take out her frustration on the many creatures that plagued Sunnydale. Unfortunately for Buffy, she couldn't find any of them. She wandered around for two hours - not finding a single vampire or lesser demon.

So that's how she ended up on the roof across from Faith's apartment. Watching the party that was in full swing carrying on without her. Nobody - including her mother seemed to care that she wasn't there. Buffy watched until the last guest finally left at 2 am. Faith's smile never dropped, and as hurt as Buffy was, she didn't begrudge the girl her happiness.

Finally, when Faith sat down on the couch and turned the tv on - Buffy decided to head home.

Nothing improved for Buffy over the next week. Nobody, including her mother, commented on her absence from the party. The only time she saw her friends were while she and Faith were training in the library.

Her training wasn't really much of anything anymore. She mostly sat and stared at books she was supposed to be reading. Pretending to read at least meant she could avoid watching Faith. She started coming to fewer and fewer sessions, and when no one called her on it - she stopped going at all.