Prompt: Send in (mouthless emoji) + a word for a short drabble, headcanon, or one-shot written in first person based on that word.
I received this prompt just as Lorde's new album art was released. For those who haven't seen it, let's just say that it's kind of NSFW and my roleplay Shelly is currently on the warpath.
He was punishing me. That had to be it.
Maybe it was because I destroyed his Halloween special. Maybe it's because I hate weed. Maybe it's because I wasn't the son that he actually wanted. Maybe he just hated me.
I had long ago muted "lorde" on all of my social media, but somehow, I couldn't avoid seeing pictures of my dad's bare ass every time I opened my browser. Of all the album covers he could have chosen, he decided to go with THAT? He was doing this to get back at me for not helping out with the Christmas special. That had to be why he was ruining my life yet again.
I knew that there was a God. I had seen Him in person once. I couldn't help but wonder why He was allowing this to happen. As if it wasn't enough that He made me look like a fucking ogre?
Somebody named "Authoriteh6969" had just sent me a DM on Coonstagram. I opened it only to be assaulted with… "her" ass again.
I should have known better. I had already received the same message from "kewwwn420" and ClYdE_fRoG_RuLeZ" earlier today.
I turned my DMs off and threw my phone across the room in a fit of rage, not even caring as it crashed into the wall and shattered into a million pieces.
The entire world was determined to fuck me over.