Chapter Eighteen - Chuck was right. You're a terrible liar....
Castiel disappears a moment later, leaving Dean alone with Andrea. The hunter observes her as she drinks, and he can't believe Sam ignored his warning and brought her into this. She wasn't supposed to be here, so close to Lilith. The last time Lilith came close enough, Andrea had been forced to do a spell she didn't want to and got hurt pretty bad. She was supposed to be at Bobby's, where it was safe. Now, on top of worrying about Sam doing the dirty with Lilith and possibly going dark side to try and kill the demon, he is worrying about Andrea.
"Come on, Andy," He finally says. "Let's get out of here," Outside, seeing her walking to the old car parked in front of Chuck's house, Dean frowns. "Where's your bike?"
"Back at Bobby's due to lack of maintenance," She replies.
"Leave the car, we'll come back for it later," He says, hoping to himself that they do get a chance to come back for it.
Andrea follows him to the Impala. Noticing the broken window, she looks at him. "Don't even ask," He tells her as she enters the car. As she closes the door, he studies her face. "What were you and Chuck talking about when I arrived?"
"Why do you ask?" She questions, looking at him.
"You pretty much stole Chuck's whiskey bottle. You either drink when you want to wind down and relax, or when something's not right," His reasoning surprises her not only because he's right, but also because it meant he had paid enough attention to understand those things about her.
For a second she considers lying, but then, remembering that Lilith is coming and that they might not make it out of here, she decides to tell him the truth. "Chuck was giving me some bad news,"
"About?" Dean asks.
"I finished the spell I was working on to trap Lilith, and--"
"You finished the spell? When? Why didn't you tell us?" Sighing, she turns in the seat to stare at him.
"I finished it while you were at the hospital. Then Zachariah happened. I know I should've said something, but I wanted to be sure it would work before I told you about it. Ruby was supposed to help me with that, but the bitch's been MIA. When Sam called me, I had to come. It was the chance we'd been waiting for. He told me about Chuck and his visions, and I came here to ask him if my spell would work. After all, the guy sees the future,"
"What did he say?" Dean questions, already imagining what she's going to say, from the look on her face.
"He said the spell won't work. Couldn't tell me why, but he was pretty sure about it," She pauses. "I'm sorry, Dean,"
The hunter narrows his eyes at her. "Why are you apologizing?"
"From day one I promised you guys, I'd find a way to help you kill Lilith. But I failed. With more time I could probably try and figure out what's wrong with the spell and do something about it, but right now, Lilith's coming, we're out of time, and it's my fault,"
"This isn't your fault, Andy," Dean replies. "Okay? It's not on you. We had no idea Lilith would be appearing today. You said you need time to figure out what's wrong with the spell, right?" Andy nods. "So, we need more time. We need to find a way to get out of this fucking town before Lilith comes. Can you help me with that?"
"Yeah, sure," She says, nodding again.
Andy follows Dean to the motel room.
"Come on. We're getting out of here," Dean tells Sam as they walk in.
"What? Where?" Sam asks.
"Anywhere, okay? Out of this motel, out of this town. I don't care if we got to swim, we are getting out," Dean pauses, looking around, confused. "Dude, where are all the hex bags?"
"I burned them," As Sam says those words, a chill runs through Andrea's body, and fear makes her magic wake up inside of her.
"You what?"
Despite Dean's worry and disbelief, and the situation they're in, Sam looks calm.
"Look, if Lilith is coming, which is a big 'if'--"
"No, no, no," Dean says, cutting Sam, and stepping closer to him. "It's more than an 'if'. Chuck is not a psychic. He's a prophet,"
"What?" He asks, not believing what he's hearing.
"Castiel appeared," Andrea says from where she's standing by the front door. "And it turns out Chuck is a prophet who's writing the gospel of you, the Winchester Gospel,"
Sam stares at her for a second. "Okay,"
Understanding that as agreement, Dean speaks. "Okay. Let's get the hell out of here,"
Sam surprises everyone when he says, "No,"
Dean looks at his brother. "Lilith's gonna slaughter you,"
"Maybe she will, maybe she won't," The younger Winchester replies, not giving up.
"So what? You think you can take her?" Dean demands.
"Only one way to find out, Dean, and I say bring her on. Besides, Andrea's here. She can help,"
"Sam, I--" She says, wanting to tell him what Chuck saw, but Dean cuts her off.
"I told you before. Andy's not a means to an end. She's not some tool for us to use. You know Lilith's after her, and you remember what happened last time that bitch came for Andrea," Sam looks from Dean to Andrea, and she doesn't miss the way he regards her.
"Fine, I don't need her anyway," He replies. "I can take Lilith on my own,"
"Sam…" Dean begins, and his tone makes Sam understand that this is more than him trying to protect Andrea.
"You think I'll do it, don't you? You think I'll go dark side,"
Much to their surprise, Dean doesn't deny it.
"Yes! Okay? Yes. The way you've been acting lately? The things you've been doing?" Sam looks at his brother, startled. "Oh, I know. How you ripped Alastair apart like it was nothing like you were swatting a fly. Cas told me, okay?"
"What else did he tell you?" Andrea doesn't say anything, knowing this ain't her business, but from where she stands she has a clear view of Sam's face and he looks worried, almost… scared.
"Nothing I don't already know. That you've been using your psychic crap, and you've been getting stronger. We just don't know why, and we don't know how,"
"It's not what you think," Sam assures, now looking relieved, which confirms Andy's suspicions that he is indeed hiding something. Something that's bad and big enough that apparently not even Castiel knows about.
"Then what is it, Sam?" Dean questions again. "'Cause I'm at a total loss," With that, he grabs his bag and nods at Andrea. She opens the door at his gesture, and steps outside. Dean stops and looks back. "Are you coming or not?"
"No," Sam says. Andrea sees the way Dean's face twists with frustration. He hesitates for a moment, but then he shoves his bag on the couch by the door, slamming it behind him.
Unsure of what to do, she stays where she is, as Dean passes her and walks to a vending machine at the other side of the motel. Wanting to give him a moment, she doesn't follow him. Instead, she goes back inside the room. Sam doesn't say anything as she enters, and sighing, Andy speaks. "Look, I know this is none of my business, but you should talk to Dean,"
"We just talked," He replies dryly. "Didn't you see how well it went?"
"That's not what I'm talking about. I don't know what it is that you're not telling him, but you should tell him, Sam. He's your brother. He deserves to know, and I'm sure he'll understand,"
With that, Sam finally faces her. There's a small smile on his lips, but he doesn't look amused. On the contrary. He looks angry. "Two weeks of being a fake wife in a fake marriage and you're a Dean expert," He says, snorting. "You and Dean being an item now doesn't give you the right to intrude in my life and tell me what to do, Andrea. I thought you wanted to kill Lilith as badly as I did, but it's clear you don't. As you said, this is none of your business, so why don't you go after Dean, and leave me alone?"
Knowing that anything she says will only make matters worse, she walks out without saying another word. Walking towards the vending machine where she'd last seen Dean, Andrea's surprised to see Castiel there, talking to him.
"Then the most fearsome wrath of heaven would rain down on that demon," Castiel says. "Just so you understand... why I can't help,"
"Thanks, Cas," Dean says much to her surprise.
The angel briefly looks at her and turns to Dean again. "Good luck,"
As he disappears, Andy looks at Dean. "What was that about?"
"Cas told me what we need to do to get rid of Lilith. You in?"
"Of course! Should I call Sam?" Dean looks across the parking lot, before shaking his head.
"Nah. It's better if it's just the two of us, come on."
As she waits for Dean to get Chuck, Andrea quickly makes three hex bags to hide them from demons. Just as she's tying up the last one, Dean emerges, dragging Chuck behind him.
"Get in," The hunter says in an unfriendly voice. "You got the hex bags?" He asks her.
"Here," She says, giving Dean one of the small pouches. "No demon will be able to feel us coming," Turning around on the front seat, Andrea hands another one to Chuck. "Put this in your pocket or something," At his hesitation, she rolls her eyes. "It's just to hide us from demons, don't worry. There's a big bad douche watching over you, remember? I wouldn't be able to hurt you even if I wanted,"
"Dean said he would shoot me if I didn't come," Chuck says fearfully.
"Good thing you're here, then,"
They drive in silence for some minutes, until Dean speaks. "When we get there, I want you to stay in the car, Andy,"
Andrea stares at him for a moment. Realizing he's serious, she remembers having this same conversation with Sam, not very long ago. "No. I'm not staying behind,"
"Damn it, Andy. Now's not the time to be stubborn,"
"I'm not being stubborn. I'm being practical. You need me. We don't know if Lilith's alone in there and we don't know if your plan is going to work. If anything happens, I'm your best chance at getting out of there in one piece,"
"How are you going to do that without the spell?" Dean questions.
"Please, Dean. That's not the only spell I have to use against her,"
Before Dean can say anything, Chuck suddenly laughs in the back seat, making them look at him.
"Jeez," The prophet says, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. "You're even a worse liar than I wrote you to be,"
"Excuse me?" She asks, and Chuck laughs again, continuing.
"I mean you gotta know by now that there's nothing you can do against Lilith, other than--"
"Shut up, Chuck!" Andy says loudly and angrily, stopping him. "You don't know what you're talking about," When he doesn't say anything else, she glares at him one more time, before turning back.
Looking straight ahead at the road, she pretends not to feel Dean's eyes on her. Soon, they reach the motel. Just as she's walking out of the car, Dean's by her side, a hand on her arm. "You sure you don't wanna stay here and wait?"
"You know I can't do that, Dean," She replies, ignoring the feelings his green eyes are awakening inside of her.
"I know," As he says that, something changes on his face. "So don't get too mad at me, ok? Cas!" Dean calls, and the angel suddenly appears by his side. Just as Andy's about to speak, the angel touches her forehead and everything goes dark.
Dean holds Andy in his arms as she passes out. "Thanks, Cas," The angel nods, and without a word he disappears again. Dean puts Andy in the back seat, and shutting the door he looks at Chuck. "Ready to do this?"
Everything happens rather quickly after that. Dean opens the door and pushes Chuck inside the room. Mere seconds later, the ground beneath her feet starts shaking, like in an earthquake, and at the same time a blinding light bursts inside the room. When the light disappears seconds later, Dean, Chuck, and Sam are getting back to their feet and there's no sign of Lilith.
Back to the Impala and ready to get the hell out of town, Sam notices Andrea in the backseat. "Is she okay?"
"She won't be when she wakes up, that's for sure," Chuck replies from behind him. "Can you two get me home? I'd very much like to drink myself to sleep,"
As Andrea is still knocked out in the backseat of the Impala, Sam drives her car. They're halfway to Sioux Falls when she jumps awake, confused and breathing heavily. It takes her a few minutes to recall and understand what had happened. "Let me out," Andrea says with an angry voice.
"We're almost at Bobby's," Dean says. In response, Andrea just opens the backseat door, with the car still moving. Dean hits the breaks and turns to look at her, but she gets out without saying a word as the Impala stops. "Andy, come on. Get back in the car,"
"Or what? You're gonna ask Castiel to knock me out again?" Andrea yells. She's fuming with rage at his actions, not believing he had actually asked an angel to put her down like that.
Seeing the Impala pull over some meters ahead, Sam pulls over too. "What's going on?" He asks, getting out of the car, trying to understand why Dean pulled over.
Andrea looks at him, anger in her eyes. "Your brother's an idiot, that's what's going on," She pauses and the memory of the way he'd spoken with her earlier that night is like fuel to her already ignited fire. "You're both idiots,"
"Can we just talk about this?" Dean asks, now out of the car too.
Walking up to Sam, Andrea sees the keys of Bobby's car still in the ignition, so she passes the young Winchester, and enters the car.
"Wait, what are you--" Sam's words are cut off by her turning on the car. Backing up enough not to hit him or the Impala, Andrea drives away without another word.
It takes only a few minutes for her phone to start ringing non-stop. She turns it off. Had she wanted to talk she wouldn't have left. They should just take a hint. Missing her bike like hell, Andrea just drives aimlessly. Initially, she drives because she's angry at Dean for taking her out of the equation like that, thus risking everyone's lives. But after some time, her mind drifts away. It was probably the only thing she missed from the time she spent running, the way the road silenced her thoughts, worries, and fears, allowing her to just… be.
She drives through the night. Sunrise surprises her, and it makes her realize how far she is. For a brief second, a voice in her mind taunts her with the idea of not going back. It would be so easy to leave it all behind and just… disappear. Get on the road and drive until she gets lost.
"I wouldn't advise it," The voice startles Andrea and she slams the brakes, violently stopping the car. With a hand on her chest, she turns around to find Castiel in the backseat.
"Holy fucking Mary! Are you trying to kill me?!" She yells. "You scared me to death, Castiel!"
The angel stares at her with his inquisitive and disturbingly blue eyes. "I assure you you're not dead and you are not dying,"
Sighing, Andrea rolls her eyes at his words. "It's just a saying," Pausing, she stares back. "What are you doing here? Did Dean send you to knock me out again?"
"I did not knock you out. I made you fall deeply asleep. And no Dean did not send me,"
His words make her tense up. "Why are you here, then?"
"You needn't fear me, Andrea. I'd never harm you," Castiel says in his deep voice.
"All of my experiences with angels were extremely unpleasant, so sorry if I don't trust you,"
Unsure of what to say to that, Castiel returns to the subject that had made him appear to her in the first place. "You're running away because you're angry at Dean for what he asked me to do, but I assure you he only did it because he was worried about you,"
Crossing her arms, Andrea replies. "First of all, I'm not running. Second of all, what a hell of a way to show his worry, leaving me unconscious and defenseless! Anyone could've gotten to me in that car! Even humans!"
"You were not defenseless, Andrea. Dean asked me to watch over you and take you to Bobby in case something happened," The angels' words take her by surprise.
"He did?" Andy finds herself asking.
Castiel nods. "Dean is a very complicated man, but he cares for you. Deeply," When Andrea doesn't say anything, the angel speaks again. "You're confused and afraid," He says, reading her. "Why?"
"None of your business, wings!" Andy snaps. "Stay out of my head,"
"I apologize if I upset you. It was not my intention. I came to check on you, and I overheard your thoughts about leaving. You should go back. The Winchesters need you. Dean needs you,"
Andrea shakes her head. "You sound like Zachariah," Something she can't name appears in the angel's usually expressionless face at the mention of Zachariah.
"I am just telling you the truth," Castiel replies.
"Well, you don't have to worry. I'm not leaving, I promise. It was just a crazy idea. I'm going to start heading back,"
Castiel nods, looking satisfied. "Good. I'll leave you to it, then. I know you dislike angels, but should you ever need help, you can call me,"
Again surprised by his words, Andrea nods. "Uh, thanks, I guess,"
With another nod, he disappears as suddenly as he'd come. Taking a deep breath, Andrea turns the car around and starts driving to Sioux Falls. Having made a stop for gas, food, and some minutes of rest, she arrives at Bobby later that night.
The older hunter is at the door when she gets out of the car. He sees her looking around. "They're on a job in Minnesota," Bobby says, answering the question she hasn't made. "You okay, girl?" He asks when she cracks her neck, stretching beside the car.
Andrea nods. "Nothing sleep won't cure,"
Alone in bed sometime later, Andy can't take Castiel's words from her mind. He cares for you. Deeply. Could those words mean what she thinks they meant? Or was she just reading too much into the confusing words from a being that has zero experience of human emotions?
In the morning, Andrea is finishing her yoga when she hears the familiar rumble of the Impala. Cursing herself for being too lazy to do her practice in the usual spot, doing it on the porch instead, she's folding her mat when the car stops in front of the house.
Sam gets out first, and although his legs seem to be heavy and he's walking somewhat slowly, he doesn't say a word as he passes through her and walks inside the house. She looks after him as he slams the door, wondering what happened.
"Ignore him," Dean says, sounding completely tired. Andy looks at him for a second, unsure of what to say to him. "Good to see you came back," He continues, finally breaking the silence. "You were so angry that for a moment I thought you wouldn't," There's a sarcastic edge in his voice, enough to make her defensive.
"I had and I still have every right to be pissed, Dean. You shouldn't have done what you did," She says.
Dean shakes his head. "I did what I did because, in spite of how much you want to get yourself killed, I'm actually tired of burying friends and losing people I care about. We just lost someone, and if you want to get mad and go all fast and furious on me for not wanting to bury you too, sue me. I'm not talking about this right now," After everything that had happened with Adam, the last thing he wanted to do was argue with her.
Andrea waits for him to grab his bag from the trunk, and when he's at the porch, she speaks again. "It wasn't about me getting killed. You didn't know if your insane archangel plan would work, Dean," She says in a quiet voice. "If something had gone wrong, I would've been your only chance of getting out of there alive and yet, you left me passed out in the car,"
"Okay, let's do this right now, then," Dean says, dropping his bag on the floor. "Not about you getting killed, you say? What do you think would happen after you turned yourself over to Lilith, uh?" Surprise appears in Andy's eyes and he shakes his head at that. "Yeah, I figured that was your plan the second Chuck called you out on your lie and I wasn't going to let you trade your life for ours. I told you before, that's not how we do things,"
"You could've explained that to me instead of having an angel do the equivalent of roofing me," She argues.
"I had no time to sit and chat, alright? Lilith was in there, trying to get Sam to make a deal with her. I had to do something. To stop him, and to stop you. But then again, I wouldn't have needed to do anything if you weren't so determined to get hurt or killed!" He yells, exasperated. Running a hand over his face, Dean continues. "I promised you we would work this out, and nothing would happen to you, remember? I'm trying to keep that promise,"
She remembered well the day they talked after Alistair found them in the cemetery. For some time she believed his words. But then real life gave her a wake-up call and Andrea could no longer pretend things would be okay.
"Don't," She replies a moment later. "You should have never done that promise, Dean,"
"Why not?" Dean demands, crossing his arms.
Regretting her words and ignoring the way she feels her heart tightening inside her chest, she takes the easy way out. "It doesn't matter," She says.
"What? Of course it matters! Damn it, Andy! I'm trying my best to keep you safe. To keep us all safe. You just need to stop trying to get captured or killed and help me!"
It's not about me being killed, this isn't about me at all, I'm trying to keep you safe! She wants to scream, to make him understand, but she knows saying that, telling him the truth about what she's doing and why will only make things more complicated and Dean won't understand at all. Swallowing down everything she wished she could tell him, Andrea takes a deep breath. "Look, I appreciate what you're doing. I shouldn't have freaked out as I did, okay? I'm sorry. I exaggerated. Can we pretend this never happened at all?" She asks, offering him a small and docile smile. Andrea turns around to leave, but once again, Dean stops her with her words.
"Chuck was right. You're a terrible liar. I can see it now. The serene face, the humble smile, the fake acceptance. You're still mad as hell at me, aren't you? But I made a question you don't wanna answer and that's why you want to let this go," His tone isn't as angry as before, and he sounds almost thoughtful as if finally understanding something for the first time. "It's the same way you lied before when I asked you about Zachariah's dream life. Why did you lie to me?" For a brief second, Andrea actually thought she'd broken free from him, but now his words are like a siren calling her, pulling her under the water just as she was about to come out for air. "Answer me, Andy! I'm fucking tired of everyone lying to me! Tell me the truth for once!" He demands, making sure to block her way and prevent her from walking away again.
She curses herself for letting the situation get out of control. Had she kept a better hold in her emotions, none of this would've happened. "It doesn't matter, Dean. I can't do this. We can't do this. You and I need to focus on doing whatever it takes to stop Lilith, and this, whatever it is will only make everything worse," She pauses to take a deep breath, trying to get at least a modicum of control over the raging storm inside of her. "We're literally living in the apocalypse. It's life and death," Andrea runs a hand over her face. "We can't do this," She repeats.
As usual, even though this is the closest Dean got to getting a real and honest answer from her, Andrea's words are vague and evasive. Tired and disappointed, he finally steps out of the way, leaning against the wall. "If this is how you wanna play this," He shrugs.
As she hurries past him without saying a word, Dean shakes his head and sighs. He stays out there for just another moment before going inside for a shower to wash away this shitty day and some much-needed rest.
Andrea runs to the back of the house, and lights a cigarette, hoping it will help her calm her heart and ease her mind.
Suddenly, she hears the kitchen door open. "You alright, girl?" Bobby asks.
"No," She finds herself saying.
"Well, you know this is your fault, right? That boy upstairs really likes you,"
Not looking back, she shakes her head. "It doesn't matter, Bobby," She says, echoing the words she told Dean a few months ago.
"One day you're gonna find out that is what matters the most. And one day, you're gonna have to open your heart for someone," He pauses, clearing his throat. "I just hope when that day comes, it won't be too late," Bobby closes the door and leaves Andrea alone with her loneliness