[Chapter 32] A time to reflect
Brrr! Eri-chan, aren't you cold? Yuka chipped, hugging her trembling body.
Why asking? The red eyes of the girl did not leave her lunch out of her sight as she filled her cheeks with a mouthful of food.
Your legs, dummy! You never wear stockings and we're in November! She rouse her voice at her indifference.
The scolded one briefly wandered her attention to see under her desk, and after a quick inspection of her naked legs, Eri turned her bored eyes at her. I don't see your point.
Her deadpanned answer only provoked a big puff of her cheeks and a huge wave of frustration on the bubbly girl.
At her right, a kind hand patted her head. There, there. Eri, don't mess with Yuka. Sena lightly scolded her.
I'm not. I was genuinely confused. She rose her dead serious eyes.
Despite that poker face look, Mine swallowed her food and turned towards the comical robotic girl. Now, seriously, you've been very absentminded lately. What's on your mind?
Could it be a boy? Yuka leaned on the table.
Before lashing the answer she had prepared, Eri took a minute to reflect on the accuracy of her guess. What if I said yes?
Then I'll ask for details. She wiggled her eyebrows.
Then, no, it's not a boy. She resumed her meal.
Lack of sleep? Sena inquired.
Once again, they proved to be very sharp today. Yes, that one is true.
Have you been worried about something? I heard news about a couple of burglar entries in the city. Be careful with that. Her friend warned the red eyes girl as she was the only one of them living outside the campus.
God, they were on point today.O-Oh, yeah. I'm always sleeping with one eye open thanks to that. She stuttered.
Mine watched the oddness the cool girl was displaying, but she didn't think it was something alarming, as Eri feared. Instead, she kindly offered her friend a solution.If you want to sleep here one day, you should say so.
Sena quickly joined in and shared her idea.Hey, how about we have a slumber party? It's been a while since the last time.
Yeah, we can talk about Eri's secret boyfriend. She flicked a seductive look towards the black-haired girl. You can try to hide it all you want, but I've caught you watching at your PDA a lot these days.
Just when Eri thought she was off the hook, they chipped in.
All that worry from a second a ago turned into curiosity to a subject they knew their friend was going to hate. Who has you so fixed on that, huh? Sena rested her chin on her hands staring directly into the unamused red orbs in front of her.
Sometimes Eri wished she could practise one her death glares on these girls, but sadly she couldn't... because it couldn't work on them no matter how hard she tried. No one. She simply cut them off. And I've already told you that rumour about my boyfriend from Scepter 4 is a baseless lie.
Her voice did not quiver, her brows were clearly frowned, and she was not avoiding eye contact; it was one of her serious statements she always proclaimed, yet none of that was enough to convince them to drop the subject.
That doesn't explain why you've been absentminded these days. Mine said suggestively.
And what do you keep staring at on your PDA so blankly? Sena joined.
Do you want to share something with us? Yuka completed the circle of schoolgirls staring at her pouty face.
Dammit, they never knew when to quit. Not to mention they were all too intuitive when it comes to point out her small behavioural changes, even when it was for the wrong reasons.
Eri's lips kept shut sulking, while her eyes looked away from the inquiring trio, but it was too late to ignore them. They were never going to back off from this, so her chances to avoid their interrogatory were scarce.
Luckily, the school bell rang announcing the end of lunch, so she could relax her body on the chair and enjoy her victory.
Aww, saved by the bell. But this isn't over. Yuka threatened her with her plastic chopsticks.
Class went by normally with nothing worth to mention, maybe the only thing amiss was her unfocused mind which kept getting distracted during the whole lecture. That was reason enough to ruin her mood, but today she didn't feel so disciplined to scold herself.
Outside of the classroom, Eri waved her hand at her three classmates who had club activities. She was in the go-home-club, so her businesses were done for the day.
Lately she's been taking some detours before going home. The library was a cool place to do her homework and stay out of the city for as long as she could. She was still avoiding going to her apartment.
But today, she didn't feel like going there, let alone do her homework. She hated to think like this. That was her only responsibility as a student, and she couldn't fulfil it. It was so pathetic.
She wasn't feeling like herself, she feared. Her mood was dejected, gloomy and tired, well, more than usual. And the worst part is that it was affecting her academic performance. She couldn't conceive that. Not because she had half scholarship, but because she was fully committed with her studies. Not even once she's skipped schoolwork since she enrolled, and she wasn't going to start now.
It's just that... today she wasn't feeling so good.
She was going to do her homework in her home, later. But she didn't want to go there yet. Maybe killing some time around the campus would make the passing hours more amiable.
She didn't know.
The fact is that her legs started walking aimlessly around the hall. There was no place in her mind, her eyes were looking at her feet as they go to make the mystery more surprising. The destiny was not important, really.
Students were moving around too, maybe she should look where she was going to not bump into anybody, but her trained body developed some instincts that got that covered, so she didn't worry over that; she had a lot on her plate already.
Walking inside a roofed bridge connecting the buildings, she could see from the windows the outside of the facility, and a vast green campus filled her view. Everything was neatly on place as always. It was relaxing to see so much order and peacefulness. No one cared about chaos or destruction in the world, everyone fooled around now that classes were over.
Blissful ignorance. If only she could be like them. Waking up in this bubble island, outside of the world, going to class on time, taking care of the groceries inside the island, fooling around with her careless friends, and going back to sleep in the dorms.
Yes, that seemed like the best plan. This campus was in an island of its own, with no contact with the exterior. No one except students or teachers could enter. It was the safest place for her. That sound like a dream, the perfect solution to her problems.
But life wasn't so easy. The rent of a room in the dorms was highly expensive. In order to pay for that, she'll have to give up on food till the day she graduates.
And it's not like she's never thought about asking for a full scholarship. She was an excellent student, and her grades were always high. The thing is that to do that, she'd need to hand in some papers she doesn't have. Her enrolment was done... clandestinely, thanks to a person who owned her a favour, so she cannot rely on him again and jeopardize her fragile school life.
If only she had enough money, she could pay for everything and be done with it. But her resources are scarce, and she doesn't have a stable income; what she stole from them is what she has.
Blinking a couple of times, Eri woke up from her busy mind and briefly observed where she was. Without her knowledge, the schoolgirl ended up walking on the green grass outside of the building.
For a few seconds, Eri styed there without doing anything. One hand was holding her schoolbag over her shoulder and her head hanged low, staring at the ground. It was the sound of her own name what broke the spell and forced her to redirect her eyes.
A boy stood awkwardly a couple of meters away from her. Her eyes barely recognized his presence, but she followed him either way. Despite being alone, she didn't register what was going on until he confessed to her. Her nonchalant features were painted with the warm colours of the sunset, it also granted a nice gleam to her reddish eyes, turning them more orange and less darker. Nevertheless, her reply contrasted her exterior with a cold apology.
Indifferent to the recent event, she restated her walk, same pace, no destination. However, her mind worked a lot while her body behaved automatically. She wondered what was so great about her that this guy might find so alluring. She used to slit people as a job. He didn't know that, in fact, he didn't know anything about her. She didn't recall having a single conversation with him before, so why was he infatuated by her? Well, maybe she was at fault for not hearing a single word he said; she shouldn't complain.
Her feet carried her towards the other building, rising in every step of the stair. On her left, the windows of the hall displayed a view of the athletics club, but her eyes found her shoes more interesting.
Lost on her thought by the window, Eri shifted her head once more when her name was called. It was a teacher this time. He asked her to take a pile of papers to the council room. She did as she was told because it wasn't a big deal, besides, she could walk some more.
Ever since the start of her second year, teachers and students started looking at her as a good student. It made her proud, honestly. Being praised and having a good reputation for carry out her responsibilities made her feel satisfied and fulfilled. It was weird how something so simple made her feel like that; she was just doing her job as a student, albeit, she still like doing it.
This time a mix of colours in the sky caught her eye. She could see pink, that didn't happen every day. It was hypnotizing, so much that she forgot where she was walking.
Ouch!
The collision against another student sent papers flying around the hall. It wasn't that hard, yet it managed to send her ass to the ground. She combed her messy hair half-hardy; it wasn't a concern how her hair looked like, but it was important to get it out of her face so she could see the damaged she caused.
No one was hurt, although the other student let out a small groan when she fell as well. Both started picking up the papers scattered on the ground. Eri made no attempt to rise her eyes from the mess, nor she apologized.
On the other hand, the other student did hand the documents to her after she was done picking them up. That's when Eri met a despiteful stare waiting for her to see it.
She rose an eyebrow when she recognized that face, in fact, she recognized the other two students behind the one crouching on the floor. Oh boy, that glare was going to make a drastic turn in a few seconds.
And just like she predicted, the look she was holding against her vanished and was replaced for a horror look.
It's been a while since she's seen those bullies. Wonder how they were?
W-We're sorry!
Quickly handing her those papers, the leader rose from the floor and the three girls flee from the scene in record time.
That was a swift meeting; Eri was still on the floor, observing quite amazed by their speed, even when her features denied her such level of expression. They seemed pretty nervous to be around them. Right, that was because she beat their asses long ago. She even showed them her knives under her skirt. Wow, now that she thinks about it, that was savage of her. She was putting her own identity at risk only because she was pissed. It was incredible how her foul mood could lead her to make an irrational decision.
Furthermore, look how they ended up. They got the message across thoroughly. That was far from caution, that was plain fear.
That got her thinking, if they got like that from seeing her knifes, how would they react if they heard about the terrible things she's done in the past?
Perfect. Now she got more depressed.
Sighing, she rose from the floor and resumed her walk.
...-_
When and how exactly did she get on the terrace of the school, she'd like to know, but not now. The sunset was about to end, and she was mesmerized. Truth is anything could have absorbed her absolute attention in the weak state she was in, but the sky did look pretty.
There was a little bit of everything, bright yellow on the horizon, orange above it, a lot of pink in the clouds, and a vast brushstroke of blue at the top of all. The fact she was in an island allowed her to watch it with no buildings in the middle; it was just the sunset and the sea. She was lazily resting her upper body on the railing, sluggishly doing nothing more than staring.
It was worth a picture. Eri didn't use her camera often, but this was a good excuse. From her skirt, she held her PDA in front of her and snapped a photo. It was a nice shot, but nothing compared to the real thing, yet she kept admiring the picture with no thoughts on her mind.
Ahh, it was happening again; she was staring at her PDA. Her eyebrows frowned revealing her inner feeling. It was upsetting to feel so awkward for looking at a piece of technology on her hand. She could easily throw it into the sea, why was she suddenly feeling so powerless in front of it?
Ugh, it was more pathetic to pretend she didn't know the answer to that. Scrolling down her PDA, she went to the contacts section and there it was, the reason behind her low spirits. The lazy mind of the teen read the name on the screen of her PDA. Totsuka Tatara.
Till this day she was impressed about how that man singlehanded got her to exchange numbers without extortion, furthermore, how he wanted to exchange numbers with her in the first place. After hearing about her background, anyone would have taken a little more time before deciding something like that. Not only he didn't judge her, but he also supported her from the side line, respecting her decision and everything.
That didn't sound like Totsuka at all, yet, since that night on the terrace, she didn't hear anything, not even a greeting message as she was hoping from him. Apparently, he was really committed to fulfil his word. Go figure.
But that was exactly what was consuming her thoughts. Totsuka knew about her life now, like a small number of the red clan and blue clan too, but this was Totsuka. He decided to give her his number to call him, but why would she need to do something like that? She didn't need his help nor she wanted it. After all, look how she ended up.
She lightly growled at his stupid name on the screen. Thanks to that meddling dumbass her confidence started disappearing. How could it be? She's never felt bad about herself before, but today she couldn't stop pitying herself. How humiliating.
The worst part was that her friends were right, she's been staring at her screen for hours without doing anything else, and she's been thinking about him all this time. Her cheeks warmed up with frustration. If Yuka could hear her thoughts, she'll be wiggling her eyebrows at her, but she'd still be wrong. She wasn't thinking about Totsuka like that, she just couldn't stop repeating their conversation over and over again. It was the first time she confessed her life from the very beginning to someone. Scepter 4 investigated her on their own, she only confirmed what Kusanagi found out, and Anna used her power against her will. Totsuka was the first one she opened up to.
It was embarrassing.
She couldn't concentrate in class, her paranoia did not lessened, and now she was more restless as ever. Everything worsened since they talked that night. And he was responsible for this. After all the damage he did to her he expected her to call him? As if.
...
Absentminded, Eri observed the written name in front of her. All of a sudden, she snapped out of her thoughts and shook her head.
Wait, no. She shouldn't even think about that.
That night she said all those things because she was confused and tired; it was a mistake. Maybe she was... vulnerable that time, but now she wasn't anymore. She didn't need no one's help because if she did, that would mean she's still... vulnerable, which she wasn't.
She's just... tired.
One more time Eri deliberately turned her eyes at those characters; she bit her bottom lip intensively while her eyelids dropped worriedly. Then she shut them and junked her PDA out of her vision.
The biggest sigh left her parted lips, her eyes were still closed. She needed to calm down if she wanted to sound indifferent. Damn, this was taking all her willpower. Once the phone tone stopped and the person on the other end picked it up, she opened her mouth.
Are you free right now?
A/N: Gosh, that was a long break, I'm glad to tell you that I finished my classes for this year, so I'm free. This was a short chapter and if I'm honest, I had almost all of it since I uploaded the latest one, and to top it all, it's a transition chapter, so nothing interesting happens here. Sorry.
Also, we're on chapter 32 and there's still NO romance at all. I know I said it was going to be slow-peaced, but damn, even I'm surprised about how long it's taking me to get there. I know what you might be thinking, and it's true; I'm a liar.