As the morning light begins to peek through Sherlock's bedroom window, he can't help but to groan as a sliver of it hits his eyes. Turning away, he suddenly realizes there is a warm lump next to him on the side that he has turned to. His eyes fly open and take in the sight before him. Molly Hooper. In his bed. Sleeping. Next to him. Blinking furiously, he rubs his face, clearing his mind, allowing the conversation of the previous night to re-fill his brain.
God, he could have sworn that was all a dream. Had he really confessed all to that to her? Did he really /invite her/ to his bed? Oh, God. "ALERT ALERT- HUGE MISTAKE", his brain screams at him, the imminence of Molly's assumptions of his newfound softness only mere moments away.
Just as he quiets his mind to an acceptable level, he sees Molly's wide, warm, brown eyes staring at him, their noses inches away from one another. He blinks rapidly again, realizing he had zoned out during his panic and hadn't noticed that she had awoken.
"M-Molly", he stutters, caught off guard.
"Sherlock", she whispers, clearly reading his facial expressions. She begins to sit up, as to make an easy getaway from his bed, but something inside him just wouldn't let her leave so easily.
"No, wait", he can hear himself saying, before wrapping his arms around her middle and pulling her back down against him. The second she had moved; he had missed the feel of her warmth.
"Damn, why the hell had he reacted that way?", he wonders. Sure, he had admitted that he loves her, but that doesn't mean he can be everything she wants or needs. He can't love her the way she expects. This isn't fair to her.
"Let her go", the small voice in his head pressures him. "You will never be good enough to be hers. You aren't cut out for that sort of thing. It's not your area, and never will be. Give up while you can."
Molly blushes pink and looks into his eyes. "What's wrong? You look...conflicted. Even if it has to do with me, you can tell me anything, Sherlock. I should hope that you know that by now. So out with it."
Of course, she had seen right through him. She always does.
"Nothing. It's nothing, Molly."
"Sherlock", she says in a light yet warning tone.
He rolls onto his back and looks at the ceiling, sighing heavily. "When I first woke up, I thought that I had dreamt that entire conversation yesterday. So when I noticed you were next to me, I was a bit surprised. That's all."
"Oh...well, I can get up. But you kind of...didn't let me."
"Right…yes, well...er..."
"Sherlock, just say what you're thinking. I'm not some fragile porcelain doll that will smash if you tell me the truth. I never have been. I promise."
"You know how I feel after everything we discussed yesterday. But I don't want you to be disappointed. Molly, I'm clearly not a usual man. I don't want you to have any expectation of what could or may transpire, if we saw to it that there was something more significant between us...and I don't want to hurt you again."
"Sherlock, we could figure things out. You and me. Whatever that may be."
"Molly, I love you. But I'm just not sure I can love you the way you want to be loved. And for that, I know I am not good for you. I know you've always dreamed of a stable, ordinary family."
"How do you know what I want and what I've always dreamed of? Okay, I admit that for the longest time I did think I wanted everything ordinary. A nice husband, house, kids. And in a way, yes, I do what that. But I quickly realized that ordinary men just aren't for me. I tried that with my past boyfriends, and especially Tom. Hell, I almost married him until I asked myself what the hell I was doing. Because yes, he was sweet, but I did love him the way you should love someone when agreeing to marry them, so I'm glad I took it back. Sherlock, I'm not the most ordinary of women, so I know now that I don't want just any ordinary man."
Sherlock feels his heart skip a beat at her words, knowing that she means it was always him for her. He clears his throat and for once in his life, can't think of a single word to say.
Molly gives him a moment to process and hugs him close, cuddling him gently as she lies her head on his chest, listening to his strong and steady heartbeat.
"Would you like me to make some tea and scrounge up whatever you have here to form a decent breakfast?"
"Mm...in a moment", he mutters, gently nuzzling her nose into her hair, quite enjoying their closeness in ways he never thought he could have.
She nods softly and bites her lip, rubbing his chest with her palm softly. "I like that you aren't ordinary. I've always liked that about you. You're different and I love that. I don't want you to have to change. Not for me or for anyone, only for yourself, which you have done. You've changed so much for the better in recent years. You're softer, kinder, but you're still just as brilliant and sharp. You are an improved version of yourself, and if I haven't told you before, I'm proud of how far you've come. I really am. No matter what the future brings."
"I'm still unsure that I'll be capable of being what you want or expect. But if you'd humor me, I'd like to try. I am trying. But I want you to know that I aspire to be more. If you'll have me."
Molly looks up at him and smiles softly, cupping his cheek. "I'd love a chance to prove to you that a relationship would be mutually beneficial in our own unique way as well. If you promise you'll stop pushing me away and tell me how you're feeling more often. I know that's difficult for you. All I ask is that you make an effort to let me in. You know I'd never hurt you."
"I do know that…and...yes. I think I'd like to do that. Starting now?"
"I'd like that."
"Good."
"Good", she giggles softly, cuddling him. "So, breakfast?"
"Breakfast", he smiles, allowing her up and following her to his small kitchen.
.
.
Once they have finished, Molly shows Sherlock the flyer that she plans to put up outside of Speedy's that day, asking for a new general manager to oversee operations. She's got the day off and was planning to stake out the bakery to see if anyone applies. Sherlock smiles weakly, visibly upset about the passing of his beloved landlady and friend. The pain isn't so easily dissipated, despite knowing that death comes to all at one point.
"I'm sorry...maybe I shouldn't have shown you..."
"No. No, I think that's a good flyer. What must be done, must be done. We can't have the café go under just because of grief. She'd come back to haunt us", he chuckles softly.
Molly smiles and kisses his cheek. Sherlock just so happens to turn his head and their gazes lock, mere centimeters away from each other. Emotions swirls between them and they both lean in at the same time, finally sealing their years' worth of repressed feelings with a tender turned heated kiss, hands in hair and gasping breaths between lips.
Once they have pulled away for air, they stare at each other shocked about what had just transpired, but also very thrilled.
"Molly..."
"Sherlock..."
He smiles shyly and strokes her cheek. "That was um, that was good. Very good."
Molly grins and her cheeks turn pink, the way he secretly adores. "I agree."
"Want to try some more?"
"Oh God yes", she giggles, wrapping her arms around his neck and pressing her lips to his once again.
The spirit of Martha Hudson shakes her head happily, a sappy grin on her face. "They'll be just fine...all of them", she muses to herself before turning towards a brilliant white light and allowing her soul to dissolve into it, towards eternal peace.
