"Ol' Feng, I have a question."
Shi Qingxuan rapped the boy, Li Nianqi, on the top of his head. "Call me Shizun!"
"...Shizun," said Li Nianqi, lips thin, "I have a question."
"Yes?" Shi Qingxuan smiled encouragingly.
"If we're climbing this hill to 'test our determination', why do we keep having rest stops?"
"The first lesson is patience!" And also your Shizun has a bad leg and can't walk very far.
"First lesson's to not learn cultivation from crazy beggars," muttered Li Nianqi's brother, Li Shijiu. Li Nianqi snickered. Li Shijiu had been dubious about the idea from the start, but had come along to help his brother navigate, since Li Nianqi had bad eyesight to the point of being nearly blind. The two boys had been recruited to help Ning Mo with the cooking now that Soup Night had become a more regular thing, and Shi Qingxuan had trouble not finding their youthful high spirits annoying.
"I'm sorry," said Shi Qingxuan. "Wasn't it you who BEGGED to be taught? Even when I...this teacher said it would be difficult? I promise I'm committed, you said. I'll do anything. And now look at you!" Honestly, this kid. If it wasn't for him, Shi Qingxuan could have been having a nice quiet lesson with Yu Yanli. But no, he had to make a fuss and get everyone excited. And now he was complaining, and they hadn't even started yet!
"Yeah but..." The boy rubbed his head where Shi Qingxuan had hit it. "I thought you meant like...having to carry heavy boulders or meditating under an icy waterfall or something. Not just...sitting around!"
"Meditation is just sitting around! Get used to it!"
"That's very deep, Shizun," said Sha Lizhong, with a mild smile.
Yeah, yeah, laugh it up, thought Shi Qingxuan. He Xuan found the idea of Shi Qingxuan teaching a cultivation class hilarious, and had insisted on coming along to watch. But even if Shi Qingxuan wasn't the world's best cultivator (or...any sort of cultivator) they had been properly trained, and just because that training had been a couple of centuries back didn't mean they couldn't remember the basic gist. They wouldn't be up for teaching high level cultivation, but the odds of any random person having the capability to develop that level of power was basically zero. So it was fine!
Cultivation schools had specially trained teachers who weeded out the few with potential from the many untalented applicants, and even then most cultivation students failed (of course, Shi Qingxuan was proof that this weeding process wasn't entirely reliable). Neither Shi Qingxuan nor He Xuan had the training to recognise spiritual potential, so the odds that any of these random beggars could develop cultivation was incredibly low. And if someone did start gathering spiritual energy, it should take them months to reach the Qi condensation stage, which was plenty of time to find a qualified instructor to teach proper control and so forth.
Shi Qingxuan had explained the odds to all their would-be students, but that hadn't stopped a group of curious beggars from following along from the temple. They'd lost about half the class along the way, but the remaining students seemed determined to learn whatever Shi Qingxuan was willing to teach. And why not? Cultivators acted so mysterious and high and mighty, but they were just people. A normal mortal like Shi Qingxuan had lived for centuries amongst the world's most powerful cultivators and gods without anyone noticing the difference. Even if all Shi Qingxuan achieved today was to demystify cultivation for a few other normal mortals, that was worth doing.
After a few more rest stops they finally made it to the top of the hill. Shi Qingxuan rubbed their aching hip and decided that next time, they were training somewhere flat.
They settled themself into a cross-legged position, wincing as their broken leg complained at this further indignity. "Now sit," they said. Everyone sat, and after a few moments of chatter settled down to quietly wait for their next instruction. Nice. It had been a while since Shi Qingxuan had gotten to enjoy bossing around an obedient crowd. Time to stop being Ol' Feng, loveable beggar, and return to the role of Shi Qingxuan, enlightened cultivator. They didn't look as impressive as they had in the old days, with their ragged clothes and disheveled hair, but they were still the same person. They could do this.
"To begin with, we will practice our breathing," said Shi Qingxuan. "Take two long breaths and one short." They demonstrated for a few cycles of breath.
"You messing with us, Ol' Feng?" asked one student, dubiously. "That looks kinda silly."
"Shizun," they corrected, sharply. "You think I have the energy to waste time messing with you lot? I could be having a nap right now! But you all wanted to learn cultivation! So breathe!"
"Ok, ok, I'm breathing!"
After a few more grumbles everyone was breathing properly, or close enough. "Now," said Shi Qingxuan, "While keeping your breath the same, let yourself relax and become nothing." They kept their eyes closed, and tried to radiate peace and calm. "You may experience a tingling sensation, but don't fret, that's just spiritual energy entering your body."
With a twinge of nostalgia, they repeated the words of their own shizun, from all those years ago. Now they'd all sit and breathe for a while, and then Shi Qingxuan would lead them all home, and hopefully there'd be soup.
"Ol' Feng," said Li Nianqi. "I'm not feeling anything!"
"Patience," said Shi Qingxuan, keeping their eyes closed, and staying doggedly calm. "Empty your mind. Breathe." See, He Xuan? they thought. I'm totally calm and in control, just like a real cultivation teacher. Which I am!
Li Nianqi let out a deep sigh, and went back to breathing. Time passed. Shi Qingxuan emptied their own mind, and let their thoughts drift. They hadn't meditated in a while themself, and even if it didn't give them spiritual energy it was a good way to clear their head.
"Ol' F...shizun?"
Shi Qingxuan opened their eyes. A fair chunk of the class had wandered off while their eyes were closed. "Yes Ol' Bao?"
Ol' Bao rubbed his knobbly knees self-consciously. "I'm not feeling any tingling, but my joints are starting to ache. Would it be alright if I lay down, instead of sitting?"
"Of course," said Shi Qingxuan. Lying down wasn't an ideal position for connecting to the universe, but being in pain wasn't exactly helpful either. "And if any point you feel like you've learned enough, you are welcome to leave."
"Nah," said Ol' Bao. "It's a nice day, and being out here with you all is companionable."
"Then you're welcome to stay," said Shi Qingxuan.
"Much appreciated," said Ol' Bao, settling himself comfortably in the grass.
"...um..." said another voice. "I'll be off, then, Ol' Feng. This was kinda interesting? But..."
"Fine, fine," said Shi Qingxuan. "This teacher appreciates the time you spent as their student. Does anyone else want to go before we return to our meditation?"
One of the brothers nudged the other, and they had a whispered argument about who'd complain to Shi Qingxuan. "Look," said Li Nianqi, "I'm trying to be patient, like you said. But how much longer will it be before we can actually do anything?"
"If you have the potential to cultivate," said Shi Qingxuan. "You should enter the Qi condensation stage within a few months to a year."
"A month? My work shift starts in half a shi!"
"After that," continued Shi Qingxuan, "you will build your core for at least a decade or two, and if you are very lucky you may be able to perform significant feats of cultivation some time before you die." They had explained all this at the start, but apparently this kid had been too excited by visions of flying on swords to pay attention.
"Decades...What about all those gods who ascended in their teens?"
"Those with the potential to become a god are beyond lucky," said Shi Qingxuan, very aware of He Xuan seated a few steps away. "And almost impossibly rare. You'd have better luck wandering around hoping to stumble across a pile of gold."
"Oh. So how do I know if I have any potential?"
"You sit and breathe," said Shi Qingxuan. Sorry kid, if there was a shortcut to immortality, everyone would have it. Well, Shi Qingxuan had taken a short-cut, but not one they'd encourage anyone to emulate.
"I've been breathing all my life!" complained Li Nianqi, "What's the point in doing more of it now?"
"You have to empty your mind," said Yu Yanli, who had been sitting so silently that Shi Qingxuan had almost forgotten she was there. "At least, that seems to be working for me. It's like ants under your skin when the energy builds up, right Shizun?"
"Uh," said Shi Qingxuan. They'd never actually felt it themself, they'd just heard other people talk about it. "Yes! That's, uh, you becoming one with the universe." They hadn't expected their teaching to actually work, at least not so quickly. Back when they were a student, it had always taken new apprentices at least a couple of months to feel anything during meditation, if they ever did. Was Yu Yanli progressing so quickly because she was older? That was the opposite of what they'd expect. And...a little concerning.
"It's a bit like how I feel when I really get into dancing," she said, dreamily. "When the music is flowing through me... Oh, is that why cultivators do all those posed movements? To flow with the energy of the universe?"
"Indeed," said Shi Qingxuan, who'd always enjoyed the exercise but otherwise found such movements pointless.
"I don't feel anything like that," said Li Nianqi, sadly. "I thought maybe being blind would give me extra powers, like in the stories."
"It would be nice if the world worked like that," said Shi Qingxuan. "But in my experience it generally doesn't."
"This is boring," said Li Shijiu. "Let's go see if that cute waitress is back at the noodle place."
Li Nianqi looked torn, but after a few tugs on his arm was persuaded to stand up to go. "Yeah, sorry Ol'...Shizun," he said. "Thanks for teaching us, I guess, but this isn't what I thought it would be."
"Everyone must find their own path," said Shi Qingxuan, with a calm smile. "Enjoy your noodles." But under their smooth Shizun persona, they were ever so slightly worried.
"He Xuan," they sent to his array. "Can you touch Yu Yanli, see if she really is collecting spiritual energy? And if so how much?"
Sha Lizhong sat, unmoving, taking two long breaths and one short, as if Shi Qingxuan had said nothing.
"You do it," he sent back. "I'm becoming one with the universe."
"What if she's about to have a Qi deviation and explode?" they replied. "You're the one with actual power!"
"You're the one who insisted on teaching cultivation. Take responsibility."
Ugh. Fine!
Shi Qingxuan used some of their remaining spiritual power to make standing easier, and limped towards their students, trying to look calm and teacher-ly.
"Good, um...posture," they said to one student, patting her on the shoulder.
"Uh huh," said the student, going back to her book. Well, at least she wasn't causing trouble.
The next student flinched back when Shi Qingxuan touched him, but was otherwise unremarkable.
They didn't bother giving Ol' Bao any advice, since he'd fallen asleep. But they touched his head to be on the safe side, and thankfully felt nothing but unwashed hair and a few stray leaves.
When they touched Yu Yanli they couldn't quite stop themself letting out a little gasp. "Um. You, uh, doing ok there, Yu Yanli?" they asked, in as steady a voice as they could manage.
"Yes, Shizun," she said, with a gentle nod.
"Hahaha, that's great," they said, while sending He Xuan a panicked "AHHHHHH SHE HAS SO MUCH SPIRITUAL ENERGY HOW IS THIS HAPPENING?"
"Because someone decided to teach her cultivation," he replied, unhelpfully. "Even though they knew it was dangerous."
He Xuan had pointed out the very small possibility of one of Shi Qingxuan's students being a secret prodigy, with the potential to gather a dangerous amount of energy before they had a chance to learn the necessary control. But Shi Qingxuan had dismissed this as just more of He Xuan's usual gloomy catastrophising.
"Yes, yes, you were right," they sent to his array. "Happy?"
Sha Lizhong's calm smile got a little broader. Smug bastard. "Shizun," he said out loud, in a shy voice. "I hate to interrupt the lesson, but shouldn't we start heading back? It's getting late."
Hearing He Xuan shyly call him 'Shizun' gave Shi Qingxuan a very odd feeling they didn't have time to examine right now.
"Yes, very true!" they said, loudly. "Thank you for your time, everyone, but that's the end of the lesson! This teacher hopes you all had fun!"
Yu Yanli opened her eyes and smiled. "I did! I feel fantastic!" She stood up and bowed to Shi Qingxuan politely. "When we get back, should I keep meditating by myself, so my Qi, uh...condenses?"
She didn't have that much spiritual energy, not even as much as Shi Qingxuan had right now, but with her lack of training she was far more dangerous, like a loose bag of gun powder vulnerable to the slightest spark. And the more energy she gathered, the worse that danger became.
"Um...no!" said Shi Qingxuan. "You shouldn't because...you should take a few days off! It's important not to strain your, uh, core." They didn't like lying to her, but they liked the idea of stressing her into a Qi deviation even less.
She nodded. "When should I start again?"
"I'll let you know," they said. "You're doing very well, though!"
She nodded, and started heading back with the others. Shi Qingxuan noticed Sha Lizhong following a few steps behind her. Good, he'd be able to keep things under control if she went into deviation. But that would just save the people around her. Keeping her safe from the power Shi Qingxuan had unleashed within her...she needed a teacher as soon as possible. Shi Qingxuan could try teaching her control themself, but considering they weren't trained for that, or even a real cultivator, they could end up doing more harm than good. Shi Qingxuan's stomach roiled with guilt and worry.
Just as they were about to leave to join the others, they realised they weren't alone.
Shi Qingxuan walked over to Ol' Bao, still sleeping peacefully in the grass. "The lesson is over," they said, gently shaking his shoulder. "Wake up."
"Hmm?" said Ol' Bao. "Oh, are we done?" He laughed, "Am I an immortal yet?"
"No, but looks like you had a nice nap."
"Hey, yeah, I did!" he said, sitting up slowly and rubbing his face. "Best sleep I've had in ages. That breathing thing was very relaxing. Thanks, Ol' Feng, maybe you cultivators know a useful thing or two after all!"
Shi Qingxuan smiled. At least some good had come of all this. "This teacher is glad to have helped."