Hello my loves. Here is the first chapter of this *hopefully* funny fic. Who's in the mood for some horny teenage Edward? This is going to be told completely from his POV.
Summary: Edward Cullen has a massive crush on teen model and actress Izzy Marie, but there's something familiar abut the new girl Bella Swan that he can't quite put his finger on.
Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters within, I just enjoy putting them in funny situations.
Stroke up. Twist. Stroke down.
Stroke up. Twist. Stroke down.
"Oh Edward, your cock is just so handsome. I can't wait until I get to put it in my mouth." The blonde haired, brown eyed vision of beauty moaned breathily in my ear.
Stroke up. Twist. Stroke down.
"Baby you have no idea how great that sounds, but your hand feels wonderful." I groaned, squeezing my eyes shut and throwing my head back against the pillows.
Stroke up. Twist. Stroke down.
"You're so big I can barely fit my hand around you."
Stroke up. Twist. Stroke down.
"Don't stop baby. I'm so close."
Up. Twist. Down.
Up. Twist. Down.
"Edward look at me."
I forced my eyes open and gazed into her dark ones.
"I love you Edward."
I came with a yell and lay there dazed and panting.
"EDWARD!"
The shout made me jump and my fantasy popped, leaving me alone in my room with my cock in my hand and a soiled magazine open in my lap. Izzy Marie, the object of my fantasy, gazed out at me from the open pages while a puddle of my jizz dribbled down her neck.
If only it was a real pearl necklace I could give her. She would look so regal. I'm sure my granny left dad some in her will. I wonder what he done with them? Maybe gave them to mom as a gift or something. Actually I'm not sure granny ever wore pearls. I tried to conjure up a picture, but I had to vigorously shake my head as the nauseating image of my dead old nan sporting a porn worthy pearl necklace swam to the front of my mind.
"EDWARD!" The yelling outside of my door continued along with the pounding of tiny fists upon the wood.
I bit back the vomit that was threatening its way up and tucked myself back into my jeans. I wiped off the magazine, distorting the ink as I did so. Shame. I closed it up and shoved it under my mattress with the others.
"What do you want Alice?" I growled, unlocking and throwing open my door, almost making her topple in. My twin was nothing more than a pain in my ass most days, but I loved her any way and loved pissing her off even more.
Alice righted herself and smoothed down her hair before glaring up at me. What my sister lacked in height she made up for in personality and style. "Where is it?" She demanded, holding out her hand and tapping her well manicured foot.
"I don't know what you're talking about Alice. Where is what?"
"You know exactly what I mean. Where is my copy of this months Teen Vogue?"
"I haven't seen it short stuff. Maybe you left it at Rosalie's." I shrugged, knowing full well I just shoved it under my bed.
"Don't lie to me Edward. I know for a fact I left it on the coffee table downstairs and now it's not there." She huffed, trying to get around me and into my room.
"Alice I don't have it." Lies. Lies. Lies. "Maybe mom threw it away when she was cleaning. Have you asked her?"
"Yes and she said that you were flicking through it while you were eating your lunch. So where is it?" She succeeded in pushing me out of the way and started rummaging through my desk and night stand.
"Alice, if you don't leave I'll tell dad I caught Jasper feeling you up underneath the bleachers during the last football game."
She gasped and spun on her heel. "You wouldn't!"
"I would."
"Ugh you're the worst twin ever!" She cried, stomping her foot and exiting my room. I closed the door behind her and made sure it was locked again.
I tidied up the small mess Alice had made and flopped down on my bed. I may be a dirty, horny teenage boy, but I like to keep my surroundings clean.
I rolled over, sitting up and flicking on my TV, turning it straight to the celebrity news channel.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not one of those gossip mongers who has to know everyone's business, but I would watch anything for the chance to catch a glimpse of my favourite teen model and actress.
Izzy Marie has been acting since the age of three when she starred as the daughter of the main man in a family sitcom. She's practically grown up on screen. Her biggest break came when she was cast in the lead role of a young teen drama at the age of thirteen. Since then her career has bloomed. She's walked runways as a model, starred in big action films and the love interest in a high budget rom com. I've been her biggest fan since I realised girls don't really have cooties. I've read all of her magazine interviews and watched all of her tv ones too. I own all of her movies and tv shows on DVD. I wouldn't call myself obsessed, just a die hard fan.
"Annnnd we're back with some breaking news." The female presenter said to the screen. "Actress and model Izzy Marie has decided to take a five year break from the industry so she can finish up her education and earn a degree." My head snapped up and my eyes zeroed in on the tv as her beautiful face was displayed on the green screen behind the reporter. "We have footage of her little interview which took place just moments ago in London." The reporter was replaced with a recording of Izzy standing behind a podium lined with microphones. She was sidelit by the glorious UK sunshine coming in the windows and her golden hair shone brightly, making her look every part of the angel everyone knew her to be.
"Good evening everyone." I glanced at my clock. The UK was eight hours ahead of us here in Washington State, meaning that it's almost six in the evening there. "Thank you all so much for coming out. I just wanted to let you all know that I appreciate all of your support, it means the world to me and I hope I will continue to get it when you hear what I have to say next. I'm going to take a five year break so I can finish my education. I want to graduate high school like a regular teen and I also hope to earn a degree in that time frame too. I need something to fall back on when you lovely lot have decided you've had enough of looking at my face." She smiled brilliantly as the small crowd laughed along with her.
"What do you plan on studying?" One reporter asked her.
"You know, I haven't decided yet. I'm just going to focus on my last year of school and hope to draw inspiration from that."
"Where are you going to school?" Another called out.
"I'm weighing up my options at the moment. I have a few lined up. There's also the possibility of studying abroad. I've always loved Italy and who doesn't like pasta?" She grinned, making the reporters laugh again. One of her body guards approached her and whispered something in her ear, making her nod in response. "I'm sorry to have to cut this short, but I've just been informed I have a plane to catch. Thank you all again for taking time out of your day to come and listen to me waffle on. I hope to see you all real soon. Don't forget me, because in the famous words of the Terminator, I'll be back." She waved to the crowd and stepped down off of the little platform amidst a sea of camera flashes, disappearing behind a curtain at the back of the room.
"There we have it viewers, Izzy Marie will not be gracing our screens in anything new for the next five years. Let's hope the industry doesn't forget her."
I felt the remote slip from my fingers as I flopped backwards onto my bed. I blankly stared up at my ceiling. My heart felt like it was struggling to pump blood around my body.
How was I going to cope with not seeing my favourite star in anything new for the next five years?
So what do we think? Horny Edward got everyone's attention?
I have plenty more antics for him to get up to. Want more? Just click that follow button.
Much love my darlings x