Dear Sunday friends, thank you for reading this angsty tale and leaving wonderful comments. After the sad chapter last week, we have a slight relief in this chapter. I hope you like it. Do keep your speculation and comments coming. I treasure them all! Happy reading!
Chapter Nine
Darcy woke up in a cold sweat again, as he had every morning since the death of young James. In his dreams he could not stop seeing the boy's small, cold body. He would try to help pull him from the water but was always too late. Sometimes in his dreams he would see his father too, but he was always out of reach.
Fully awake and unwilling to go back to sleep, Darcy went downstairs, where he ran into George Wickham, bragging to a maid in the corridor about telling Elizabeth lies about him. He had kept his distance from Wickham since the day of James's death. Darcy wanted to give Wickham a well-deserved beating! He did not understand why Wickham would tell such a lie to her. Darcy also felt as though something was dubious with George regarding James's death. But Darcy's father would not condone his ungentlemanlike behavour if he used his fists. He vowed to do by his father's principles from this day onwards. He straightened his coat before turning the corner in the corridor.
"Darcy," Wickham greeted with a typical smirk. The maid curtsied to her master and returned to her chore immediately.
"Wickham," Fitzwilliam said curtly.
"Do you want to play whist later? I've got my hands on some brandy," Wickham said eagerly.
"No, thank you. I've got much to do before I prepare to go back to Cambridge," Fitzwilliam, ignoring the man.
"Well you should be celebrating—all of the Bennets are preparing to leave and will be out of your life, for good," Wickham said in a serious manner.
"You certainly took care of that," Fitzwilliam murmured.
"What did you say?" Wickham asked.
"I said, 'Yes, that's the end of that,'" Fitzwilliam replied quickly. He would not waste his time with the pathetic young man. He would find a way to send Wickham away and not let him pollute the shade of Pemberley.
"Right. I'll be off then," Wickham said.
After finishing breakfast, Fitzwilliam went to the garden, where he found his mother, who invited him to sit.
"Fitzwilliam," she said, "We must speak."
"Mother, please let me speak first. I have been thinking about the things that my father taught me, and it has made me remember that there is so much more to life than wealth and society. I feel that we should be more lenient with the Bennets, regardless of what Mrs. Bennet has done. Now that we are aware that she has lied, perhaps we might watch her with a careful eye," Fitzwilliam said in a rush, pleading with his mother to hear him. The teachings of his father would remain close to his heart from now on.
Lady Anne was red in the face and thoroughly annoyed. "I say, Fitzwilliam, your father and his humility," she said in a mocking tone, "has filled you with quite romantic notions. We will not be lenient with the Bennets—I want them gone. Especially Elizabeth Bennet, as I do wonder if the girl is the cause of all of your sudden concern. Besides, I have heard that they are leaving tomorrow. It will cause some scandal, certainly," she said wickedly. Lady Anne grinned with joy after learning from Robert Wickham that the Bennet widow would cause colossal trouble to Lady Matlock. In the years she was exiled in Matlock, she hated her oh so infuriating sister-in-law with a vengeance.
Fitzwilliam shook his head. "No, Mother. Miss Elizabeth has nothing to do with it, I only think that—"
Lady Anne interjected, "Indeed, then I suppose you might not reject a betrothal to your cousin Anne de Bourgh? She is very lovely, and the marriage would be so suitable for our family."
Fitzwilliam felt his blood run cold. "Anne de Bourgh? Absolutely not, Mother."
"We can leave for Kent in a few days. You still have a week of holiday—then we shall attend balls where you might be able to announce the courtship—"
"No, Mother. I will not have this. You may want a brief control of Pemberley for now, but do not forget that I am to be of the majority in only a year hence. I shan't marry Anne, nor will I let you have your run of Pemberley!" Darcy said, raising his voice.
"Fitzwilliam! You have never spoken to me in this way! It is the disrespect that your father taught you while you were in Hertfordshire, no doubt," Lady Anne exclaimed in mock self-effacement.
"No mother, it is quite the opposite. I am very much tired of your coldness toward everything and everyone, not to mention your efforts for control of myself and Pemberley. If you are to continue your place in my life, I need you to change," Fitzwilliam said firmly.
Lady Anne ignored Darcy. "Clearly you need some time to realise that a marriage to Anne would be most prudent. We may revisit this matter." She got up then, holding her head high as she trotted back into the house.
Fitzwilliam was thoroughly exasperated with his mother's indifference and aloof nature. "Help me, Papa," he whispered.
~P&P~P&P~P&P~
"Mother, we cannot possibly live with Lord Radbourne!" Elizabeth exclaimed, exasperated at her mother. Mrs. Bennet informed her that Lord Radbourne was planning for them to stay at his Wigston Abbey, but Elizabeth thought the whole situation improper.
"Elizabeth, you do not have to come with us, but Jane, Kitty, Lydia, and I will be living with Lord Radbourne. He is very gracious—you should be thankful," Mrs. Bennet said coolly. She had returned to her usual callous demeanour after James was laid to rest.
Mr. Kingsway, who had been in the county on business had arrived just in time to attend James's funeral and was now helping them sort out their next living arrangements interjected, "Madam, I can arrange for more… appropriate lodgings for you all. Mr. Darcy still wanted you to be cared for."
Mrs. Bennet looked at him coldly. "A measly cottage in Swansea? Why would I waste my good humour in a savage place?"
"The estate yields nearly a thousand pounds a year…"
She cut off the solicitor mid-sentence, "There is no need, Kingsway. Lord Radbourne has offered me a grand home to entertain and be the mistress of it." She spent time with Lord Radbourne after the funeral service, which he attended. Mrs. Bennet had kept Lord Radbourne sweet on her over the last few months, knowing that he would accept her advances when the time was right.
Now was that time, and after she seduced Lord Radbourne the previous evening, he offered her accommodations at his estate as his mistress. She would be the real mistress of Wigston Abbey, except in name only. His elderly wife, Lady Radbourne, was too ill to leave her bed chamber nor to protest, after all.
Elizabeth was horrified that her mother had become a mistress so easily, and she refused to let herself or Mary live in a home that welcomed such depravity. She feared for her other sisters, even though they did not get on well. "Mother, it is not proper. We hardly know the Radbournes. I do not think that Lady Radbourne or their children, including Lady Matlock would accept such a situation either, especially after all that has happened."
"I do not care what Lady Radbourne, or Lady Matlock think—it is entirely Lord Radbourne's decision and I welcome his invitation. I cannot abide by living in a mere cottage," Mrs. Bennet said.
"Mrs. Bennet, think of your daughters," Mr. Kingsway said. "If you do not like to move to Swansea, Mrs. Gibson in London has agreed to house all of you too."
"Why would I want to cramp in my mother's smalltown house on the wrong side of London? I will have Wigston Abbey and Lord Radbourne's Mayfair town house at my disposal. I do not need any assistance, Kingsway. It is all settled. You may speak with Elizabeth if she truly does not wish to live in a beautiful estate as Wigston," Mrs. Bennet said, returning to her musings.
Mr. Kingsway sighed. This woman will ruin the girls' reputations, not to mention her own, he thought. He looked at Miss Bennet and Elizabeth who was in the room. Miss Bennet started discussing with her mother the living arrangement at Wigston. His lips thinned. His priority and loyalty were for Miss Elizabeth. "Miss Elizabeth, shall we step outside to speak?"
Elizabeth nodded and they went outside to the garden. "Where shall we go, Mr. Kingsway?" Elizabeth asked with distress in her eyes.
Besides offering the cottage near Swansea, Mr. Darcy had asked Mr. Kingsway to contact Mrs. Gibson's husband too. Mr. Darcy and the American businessman seemed to get on well during his short stay at his house some years ago. They had kept up a correspondence throughout the years. Mr. Darcy suggested that Mrs. Bennet and her daughters feel more comfortable living with Mrs. Gibson in London. Mr. Darcy would be willing to contribute to their living expenses based on his father's will. Mrs. Gibson agreed readily, requesting to be paid a sizeable monthly sum than reasonable. Mother and daughter were very much alike. Mr. Gibson, however, overruled his wife and accepted the amount Mr. Darcy's offered.
"I have already arranged for you and Mary to live with your grandmother again. Jane, Kitty and Lydia may also join you if they wish. You know your grandmother's nature, but at the very least, she will have a suitable home for you until you are married. I have met Mr. Gibson. He is an aimable fellow with a big heart. He will keep all of you safe," Kingsway said.
Elizabeth cast a downward glance. He was right. Regardless of how much her grandmother was like her mother, at least she and Mary would not have to live in disgrace. And she did like Mr. Gibson. He was very open-minded about everything. She did not know how he and her grandmother ended up together. "Thank you, Mr. Kingsway, that is most kind. I should be very grateful to live with my grandmother."
She wiped tears from her eyes and smiled up at the man, who looked to be weary from all of his dealings with the Darcys and Bennets.
"The situation with your mother will be a scandal, no doubt," Kingsway said delicately. "But you must remain the strong Elizabeth Bennet I have always known."
Elizabeth felt steadier on her feet now. "Thank you, Mr. Kingsway. Will you write to me with any more progress regarding the accident?"
"As soon as I have learned more. If you would like, you and Miss Mary may accompany me back to London where I can assist with your move back to the Gibson Townhouse," Kingsway offered. He had become very fond of Elizabeth in their years of correspondence. She grew to be a resilient, strong young woman and he wanted to help her as much as he could.
"I would be much obliged," Elizabeth said with an appreciative smile.
"I plan to visit Master Darcy before our departure. Shall you accompany me to say goodbye?" Kingsway asked.
Elizabeth narrowed her eyes, replying, "No, but thank you. I do not wish to speak to Master Darcy."
Mr. Kingsway wanted to ask further but thought it better to leave the young people be. Instead, he departed from Elizabeth, heading back into the house where he would tie up any loose ends with Mrs. Bennet. Kingsway was relieved to finally see that George Darcy's name cleared. Mrs. Bennet withdrew the fake will and more. He thanked the Lord to finally finishing his dealings with Mrs. Bennet. However, it saddened him to see the irritation on Elizabeth's face when he mentioned Fitzwilliam. Kingsway prayed that whatever was between the pair would pass with time—he wished to see at least one of their fathers' final wishes fulfilled.
~P&P~P&P~P&P~
Mr. Kingsway came to visit Darcy that afternoon. Kingsway informed Fitzwilliam that Elizabeth and Mary would be going to live with the Gibsons again, accompanying Kingsway on his departure. Fitzwilliam was happy to hear this, as he did not want Elizabeth and the shy Mary embroiled in their mother's newest disgrace and scandal.
Mr. Kingsway also suggested that he go see Elizabeth before she left. Darcy knew that she would perhaps not want to see him, but he had to make amends, as he had no idea when he would be able to see her next.
On his drive the Dowager house, Darcy reflected on all of the time he spent with Elizabeth. All of their play and merry times during their youth. All of the times that she supported him over the years, especially the night that their fathers passed.
How could I have been so foolish? Darcy asked himself. Elizabeth's words at the night at the pond were true—she had been no less than a friend to him for so long and in his anger and despair he pushed away the one person he was closest to. Not only did he push her away, he ridiculed and shamed her for years without provocation. He was so ashamed of himself.
Darcy could not help but also think about Elizabeth's beauty and what that stirred in him—what it had always stirred in him, since he was old enough to understand. She was eighteen now and lovelier than he had ever seen her. Her green eyes glowed with brightness and intelligence, and her curls were the loveliest shade of chestnut, enhancing her complexion.
"But I was only ever a brother to her," he said aloud to himself. Elizabeth had scarcely even hinted that she might return his feelings and he should certainly not expect for her to return them now, after all that had passed.
Yet Darcy realised that he could not live without Elizabeth in his life and would have her as a sister or perhaps even just as a friend. That would be more bearable to not have her at all.
He arrived at the house, which was bustling with servants who prepared the family's belongings for their imminent departure. He requested to meet with Elizabeth.
"Yes, Master Darcy?" Elizabeth asked, looking at him in irritation, when she came down to the parlour.
"May we speak in the garden—for privacy?" Darcy said, pleading.
Elizabeth looked at him for a moment and then nodded, walking to the far back garden of the house where would not be seen by her mother or sisters.
Darcy spoke first. "Elizabeth, I am so sorry. For everything—treating you so despicably since our fathers died because of my own pain, calling you such horrible names, not believing your discoveries about the accident, leaving you when I promised I would not. I am so sorry, Elizabeth," he said, eyes fierce with apology.
Elizabeth had not expected this. She expected him to argue with her one last time before their final departure. "I—I do not know what to say, Master Darcy."
"Please, call me Fitzwilliam. Forcing you to call me such was merely foolish pride," Darcy said, drawing closer to her.
"I do not know if I can trust you again, or if we may ever be close in the way we were. I am sure you have heard about Mother's decision to become Lord Radbourne's mistress. With this scandal, it would likely be unwise for you to associate with me," Elizabeth said, face flushed with shame.
"I-I hope you find it in you-to trust me again someday, Elizabeth," Darcy stammered. "I know that you hate me now, but I will never hurt you again. I vow to follow Father's teaching from now on. I will spend the rest of my life proving that to you. We do not have to return to what once was, but perhaps you may just count me as a friend?" Darcy asked, taking her hand.
She let him hold it for a short while before letting go. "I do not truly hate you, Fitzwilliam. I do not think I ever could," Elizabeth said with a sad smile. "But what change your mind, about me?"
"Seeing James's small, cold body shocks me to the core. Life is short and unpredictable. What if-what if I lose you too?" Darcy choked back his tear and continued with his muddled explanation. "You are the only true friend I have ever known. I have made a few friends in the university but I am never completely at ease with them, as I am with you."
"I suppose it might be nice for us to be friends again. It has been lonely, these past years." Elizabeth murmured, looking to the woods ahead of her.
Darcy's heart broke again, understanding he was the cause of much of her pain and loneliness. He dared himself to do more. Taking a few more deep breathes, he drew forward to embrace her gently, heart pounding at touching her again. Darcy held her for just a few moments before letting go.
"I am sorry again, Elizabeth."
She turned to him, surprised to find tears in his eyes. "I forgive you, Fitzwilliam. We need not speak of it further."
"Right," Fitzwilliam said quietly and then he smiled, spreading a first genuine smile since his father's death years ago. His heart soared. They would be friends again! It was the first step. He would work towards making her feel for him, like a man and a woman. "Please write to me while you are in London, Elizabeth. I will leave you my address in Cambridge too."
"Yes, I shall. We might need a third party—I do not know if my grandmother should like letters coming from you. The same might be said for your mother," Elizabeth whispered. Her heart had been pounding in equal measure. The touch of Fitzwilliam was nearly too much, her heart in war with her rational mind.
"I am sure Kingsway would help us. Perhaps we might funnel our letters through him, and he could forward them to the other person?" Fitzwilliam proposed, thrilled that she agreed.
"That sounds like a very good idea. I shall ask him during our journey to London," Elizabeth replied. "Does this mean you believe that there was more to the accident?"
Darcy swallowed before replying, "I do. Will you tell me all of your findings?"
They sat down on a bench in the beautiful garden, watching the sun set beyond the trees as Elizabeth told him all of her and Mr. Kingsway's research over the past few years—the carriage maker, the servant at the carriage stop and the farmer. Darcy listened and nodded as he digested the information.
"I see," Fitzwilliam said uneasily. "I will assist you in any manner that I can. Please write to me with whatever Kingsway finds."
"Of course, I will," Elizabeth said. They sat in silence now, years of animosity between them slowly unravelling. Count me as a friend, he said to her. Should I take that mean he does not view me as more than that? It does not matter now, Elizabeth supposed. Her mother's decisions to become a mistress of the elderly Lord would make her completely unsuitable, especially for someone as wealthy and connected as Fitzwilliam. They might be sitting together, but there was an invisible gap, more enormous than River Derwent, between their lives and situations from this day onwards. She must be content as being a friend of Fitzwilliam.
"Thank you, Elizabeth. I do not think there are words great enough for the apology I owe you," Darcy said.
"I am pleased that you will be living with your grandmother again."
Elizabeth agreed, "Yes, Mr. Kingsway was such a help, securing that for Mary and me. To be sure, anywhere would be better than Wigston Abbey."
Fitzwilliam hesitated, before saying, "Elizabeth, you must know that Wickham's words were lies. I truly fought against my mother's coldness to have you all remain."
Elizabeth looked into his earnest eyes. "I believe you. I figured that out not long after we had argued about it. The more I thought about the matter, I recalled that Wickham was particularly irritated about your admonishment in the forest and might perhaps have been waiting to seek retaliation."
"Yes, I am certain you are right. I truly want nothing more to do with the man, or my mother, for that matter," Darcy said seriously.
"It is getting late, Fitzwilliam. It might be unseemly if we are discovered here alone… No matter how long we have known each other," Elizabeth said, blushing.
"I do not wish to leave you," Darcy said to her.
"Believe me—I do not wish for you to leave either. It saddens me that we have only just made our way back to friendship and now we must part."
Darcy gazed deeply down into her green eyes. "Do not be saddened. Our friendship shall continue, no matter our distance."
He badly wanted to kiss her farewell but refrained from doing so. It would ruin our newfound friendship if she thought that I desired her in such a manner, especially when she does not feel the same, he thought.
"Shall I ever see you again?" Elizabeth asked, tears gathering in her eyes.
Darcy allowed himself to brush the hair away from her brow, memorising every inch of her lovely face. He took her hand and pressed his lips to it, savouring the touch of her.
"You have my word, Elizabeth."